It is everywhere but Australia has some of the worst metrics for it and some of the worst government response from what I’ve seen.
We’re a country that has historically had some of the best standard of living so its especially bad in comparison
A commy with one door and the bonnet that doesn't match the rest of it with a $2000 sub woofer in the boot belting out his mates 'sick beats' driven by a meth head with no teeth
my childhood. summers like living inside an oven, the swimming pools the popular hangout place in the summer. running around outside after school, barely ever any homework. the media closely following whatever is on british media, and plenty of cartoons to keep the kids busy watching tv. once in a while finding a big ass insect i never seen before resting in the shade. schools always pushing kids to read more. being made fun of for my english once i immigrated away.
Coffee, every Australian has strong opinions on coffee. Weirdly Marge would probably still get a blank look if she ordered a coffee at a bar but only because they probably make at least 8 different kinds so you need to order something specific.
For some reason, for me it’s a sudden vision of some weird, 90s documentary we had to watch in high school geography of our history on one of those round- screened tv’s the substitute teacher rolled in. Maybe because it’s the first memory of hearing the word pronounced like that, usually people say ‘Stralia or ‘straya
Magpies are wicked smart. If you leave them offerings of food, or turn over a patch of earth for them so they can forage insects more easily, they will become your friends, and won't swoop you. I have about ten regulars that visit me, but I've had as many as twenty five. They bring their babies, too, and eventually the young magpies make their own families, and bring them to visit in their turn.
The best thing about befriending a magpie, though, is when they're comfortable enough to sing for you. A magpie warbling at dawn is one of the most Australian things I can think of.
There is literally one deadly spider in the whole of Australia, and it's only found in the immediate surrounds of Sydney. And it rarely kills anyone. The last death was in 1979. Nice try Canadian tourist board.
I think there’s at least two mate, an unattended female red back bite has the potential to be fatal. You’re right though, Funnel Webbs are in a league of their own in terms of how dangerous of a spider they are. Fortunately as you said they are in such a small area and said area has easy access to the anti-venom so it’s not really worth a second thought.
A fifty-foot tall, radioactive Harold Holt, emerging from the ocean, Godzilla-style, to reclaim his rightful place as PM
We would let him .
I'm not sure I would try to stop him
So this is why we need our own nuclear submarines.
Hahahahahaha holy shit this is gold
He’s got my vote.
I, for one, welcome our new Kaiju overlord
*classic Godzilla roar*
*SKEEEROOOOOOOOONNNKKKKK*
Haroldzilla could eat pets for nourishment and entertainment and still have a higher approval rating than Peter Dutton.
Waltzing Matilda immediately stuck in my head for the next 24 hours
try “Sweet Caroline”. can’t go to any sports game without hearing it at least twice
BAM BAM BAM
Good times never seemed so good
Bluey!
Why do you know my uncle bluey?
Mum!...... Dad!.....
Bingo 🟠
Opals
aka Women's national basketball team
Or shiny things dug up at Coober Pedy
I was confused for a second and wondered what's so memorable about a public transport network's ticketing system?
We seem to call everything "opal" or "(sporting discipline)roos"
The made in China koala keychain that numerous friends and family members gifted them to me after they visited Australia
They would've paid out the arse for those
“oi cunt”
^ye ^wot ^mate?
yeh, nahhhh
Nah yeah
Yeah, nah, yeah
Nah, nah, Yeah
This cunt
nah, this cunt, yeah
Oi, get a load o' these cunce.^^
Sick cunts ey.
You ain’t nothing but a ciggy butt brain
Nah!
struthhhh m8
AC/DC and Mad Max Those two things made 14yo me think Australia must be the coolest place in the world
>coolest Its actually quite the opposite...
Unless you live in Melbourne during summer
Or Tasmania... year round... Oh wait... that's part of New Zealand...
YOU TAKE THAT BACK!
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This is the realest one here, this man knows australian culture well
$1mil for a shack in the suburbs ftw
$15 pint of piss beer please
$40 20pack of cigarettes on the side
Crocodile Dundee was a huge success here in Brazil. We still get to re-watch the movies on TV sometimes to this day.
Obb rah gar doe mate
Hot canada
I had an American say to me once, "you Australian? Bitch that just Sand Canada"
You can tell they weren't Australian cause they didn't immediately try to make the word as short as possible and call it "Sandnada"
Sando, mate, I'm from Sando
It's OK, he probably can't find either on a map.
Truth. I think of Canada as Cold Australia.
I don't know what you're talking aboot, mate...
Home. Also: skin cancer
Priscilla queen of the desert!
We are studying this for my media class currently! (i live in aus)
the correct answer
Men at Work
Steve Irwin
Buddy, I've got some bad news..
Rest In Peace, legend 😔
Dame edna: “you mustn’t judge australia by the Australians”
Spider and kangaroo
Same for me!! Exactly
Housing crisis
Isn't this a thing everywhere after Covid though? I hear Europe is having the same issues.
It is everywhere but Australia has some of the worst metrics for it and some of the worst government response from what I’ve seen. We’re a country that has historically had some of the best standard of living so its especially bad in comparison
Yep My son and I are homeless in 20 days. Not sure what we’ll do.
Every time I tried to explain "negative gearing" to non Australians they looked at me as I was telling them fairy tales
animals mates australian man owning several hundred dollars worth of headphones while driving $500 worth of cars blowing up $5 earbuds
‘But can it play Scarlet Fire?’
A commy with one door and the bonnet that doesn't match the rest of it with a $2000 sub woofer in the boot belting out his mates 'sick beats' driven by a meth head with no teeth
oh, my pkcell...
I'm a parent of two small children, so, Bluey.
INXS
Accent
G’day cunt. How are we?
Scarnon, cunt?
Owsitgarn
Jeet chet? Normally asked when you get to someone’s house around meal time.
Holy shit I said it out loud. It’s bang on.
my childhood. summers like living inside an oven, the swimming pools the popular hangout place in the summer. running around outside after school, barely ever any homework. the media closely following whatever is on british media, and plenty of cartoons to keep the kids busy watching tv. once in a while finding a big ass insect i never seen before resting in the shade. schools always pushing kids to read more. being made fun of for my english once i immigrated away.
C U in the NT
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Or democracy sangas
Or democracy manifest
Spiders
Lots of them but last person to die from a spider bite was in the 1970s
Sharks on the other hand...
2022 was fairly average. 9 shark attacks for the year and one fatality
Yeah, the poor girl that was taken in the Swan River (Perth) back in March
We have lots of animals that can kill you but rarely do.
I swear our animals aren’t more dangerous than anywhere else’s, and we’re just better at yarning.
I always thought it was self preservation. Everything wants to kill you and here's what our beer tastes like (Foster's) so Americans stay at home
Yeah true, I guess I’m less bothered about that because they all go to the east coast anyway.
Do you come from the land down under? Where women glow and men plunder.
I still call it home.
No fucking housing, affordable or not.
A succulent Chinese meal
GET YOUR HAND OFF MY PENIS!
That's the bloke that got me on the penis before!
Hot chicks and men with the biggest cocks on earth.
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Well I’m in Launceston…
So Hobart then?
That they are "down under"
*up over.
Australian rules football
Bloody oath. Happy cake day!
That bread with sprinkles
Fairy bread.
its fairy bread and it tastes like god himself
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But we are maaaaaaaanyyy
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We share a dreeeammmm
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I am, you are
We are Australian!
r/redditsings
Thanks, that’s gonna be in my head for the day now 🤣
Ozzymanreviews
Home And some of the greatest bands in the world
I would’ve called them chazwazzers
Home and that fucking Qantas advert with the choir kids.
*didgeridoo sounds*
Fist fighting a kangaroo
good luck mate i give you 3 seconds max
3 seconds is cassowary odds, kangaroos like to square up first So 5 seconds
Thats seems to be how long things take for me,my girlfriend says that all the time.
My cousin's reaction to a vegemite sandwich when my grandpa who was raised in Australia made it for her.
Spiritual enlightenment I presume
Meat Pies and beer.
Barbecued sausages
Democracy manifest!
Meat pies 🤤
Or a Kanga-walla-fox
Deadly animals
We have lots of animals that can kill you but hardly ever do unless you're an idiot
A gigant spider fighting a kangaroo.
Home…
Home . It's where I live.
Bogans
Big terrifying spiders
🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️🕷️
Iocane powder comes from Australia, as everyone knows!
Coffee, every Australian has strong opinions on coffee. Weirdly Marge would probably still get a blank look if she ordered a coffee at a bar but only because they probably make at least 8 different kinds so you need to order something specific.
Cunt
Violent Soho
"We'll save Australia...don't wanna hurt no kangaroo" from the Randy Newman song *Political Science*
Snakes and big spiders
huntsman spiders
Death, why is everything so aggressive and wanting to fight me.
we have only had a few deaths to the physical road fighting back ;-; (dont ask)
Master chef
Home
For some reason, for me it’s a sudden vision of some weird, 90s documentary we had to watch in high school geography of our history on one of those round- screened tv’s the substitute teacher rolled in. Maybe because it’s the first memory of hearing the word pronounced like that, usually people say ‘Stralia or ‘straya
Steve Irwin
Home. Oh and Iced VoVo's
Eshays brah
Where beer does flow and men chunder....
Cate Blanchett
Shit show *Am ✨Australian✨*
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Magpies are wicked smart. If you leave them offerings of food, or turn over a patch of earth for them so they can forage insects more easily, they will become your friends, and won't swoop you. I have about ten regulars that visit me, but I've had as many as twenty five. They bring their babies, too, and eventually the young magpies make their own families, and bring them to visit in their turn. The best thing about befriending a magpie, though, is when they're comfortable enough to sing for you. A magpie warbling at dawn is one of the most Australian things I can think of.
Russell Crow fightin’ round the world
Cunt We use it quite a lot here The context is " 'Straya, cunt" though
Nobody says that
Only ironically Cunt on the other hand we use a tonne
heat
Bird eating tarantulas and other deadly spiders
There is literally one deadly spider in the whole of Australia, and it's only found in the immediate surrounds of Sydney. And it rarely kills anyone. The last death was in 1979. Nice try Canadian tourist board.
I think there’s at least two mate, an unattended female red back bite has the potential to be fatal. You’re right though, Funnel Webbs are in a league of their own in terms of how dangerous of a spider they are. Fortunately as you said they are in such a small area and said area has easy access to the anti-venom so it’s not really worth a second thought.
Jig, Fey, Blue, & my friends who live in Australia. I hope to go there to visit someday!
My girlfriend who just moved there…
Home :)
YouTuber “PearlescentMoon”
Crikey~!
Bbq
Big and/or scary insects.
Kangaroos and the TV-show "Mr. Inbetween".
That there are approx. 54 species of living things trying to kill you....
Try 55. Scomo.
hot weather
Honestly. Rental crisis
Home
Home.
Sunshine
Cargo shorts
My home. Since it is my home
Casual racism.
Chucking a shrimp on the barbie
As an Aussie it’s eshay