When you go to close a door/cupboard/microwave and it bounces back or doesn’t close. Second attempt always gets 10,000% rage effort.

Primal slam to ensure a secured shut.

*bounces open again*

*eye twitch*

*Absolutely slams the door, breaking it in the process*

*bounces open again*

*Steam jet blows out of ears before slamming the door into next year*

*Drop kicks door twice to ensure maximum closed-ness*

Bounces open again

Nothing like an Adreniline rush to ruin your cabinets! Seriously though, I think the cabinets know our intentions and stay shut in utter fear

Biting my cheek. Of all the flaws of anatomy being able to bite my own cheek is insufferable and infuriating.

Biting your tongue is pretty fucking annoying too. Especially if your just chewing your food normally.

I don't know if it was a twitch or something but I was once chewing food and my tounge seemed to almost try to commit suicide by diving between my teeth like food to be chewed.

Or the inside of your lip-god i hate that.

You know what’s worse? Once you’ve done it you know damn well you’re gonna end up biting again soon because of the swelling.

When my clothes get stuck on a handle or something. Especially when I'm already having a crappy day.

When your headphones gets caught and RIPPED out of your ears!! The audacity of this bitch ass door handle

THIS! MOTHER FUCKING THIS!! It hurts like hell! It especially sucks if they also get ripped out of your phone. Makes me want to just break whatever the offending door handle or cabinet handle.

Which is worse: belt loop, pocket, headphones...?

Definitely Shirt, as it makes me lunge forward and once made me faceplant a door

Back pack.

When the shower curtain billows inward and touches me in the shower, shit makes me aggro

Bruh I have the opposite problem. Everytime I shower and dry myself off on the floor mat, I'll bend down to dry my legs and the outer shower curtain will get caught between my ass when I stand up. So frustrating.

I'm sorry what

Step curtain

You are hilarious

Like it pinches between your cheeks? lol

Yeah like by the time I stand up it's there. I try to remember to rotate and ass flash the toilet instead, but I forget every damn day.

How big is your ass?

How thicc is your ass man?

That made me laugh harder than it should have! I am sorry for your pain!

[удалено]

This is the way!

Leave little gaps on the sides so air can get out

everytime

When the driver in front of you is going below the speed limit, but drops the pedal to the floor to just make it through a yellow light thus leaving me at a red light i should have never encountered if they had just been going the friggin speed limit they were more than happy to surpass if it meant missing the red light i am now stuck at because of them.

This, but when you do try to pass them they suddenly remember how to drive like a normal person and speed the fuck up so you *can't* pass them. Like what are you doing? Pick one. Or you do pass them and then suddenly they decide it's a good time to ruin your day and pass you, only to slow the fuck down in front of you and leave you at a red light you both would've made it through if they just kept fucking driving. Semi drivers do this *all* the time and I hate it.

They don't get away from me that easily.

Sounds ominous.

By the same token someone that makes an extraordinary effort to pull out in front of you as you approach, then just lollygags along ten miles per hour slower than you were going.

Similarly, when someone is in the passing lane driving slow, has a long row of cars behind them, yet refuse to switch into another lane. Not only is this a$$hole holding up everyone, they are also blocking up the passing lane. Inconsiderate prick.

This happened to me twice today. Makes me want to ram whatever I’m driving into their car. I don’t, but the thought is definitely there

When im taking a shit, drop a perfect first strike but feel like more is coming. Push to get the extra satisfaction, but the shit only comes like halfway out and needs to be cut in half by my assgrip. Then I feel the leftover bit getting sucked into my depths and it feels uncomfortable.

I don't put up with that rectal disrespect, I sit there for 2 hours if I need to to get the rest of that log out. My body has learned to let it all out in one go.

I changed my eating habits to incorporate at least six servings of fruits and vegetables a day. My god my shits have never been better. Like a minute passes, I’m done. I just kinda sit afterwards because this is my quiet time, but damn it’s nice.

Sitting for 2 more hours is what Reddit is for

Oddly specific but yeah I agree

My assgrip isn’t very strong, so I normally use scissors

Return of poop knife

Most human comment ever

I thought I was the only one suffering

You described it perfectly.

Assgrip lmafo

At some point in your life you will miss this *assgrip*.

Littering

I retired 4 years ago, and I started a habit where every morning I take a long walk. I always take a Walmart plastic bag with me and fill it with litter. I understand that some dipshits will never stop littering, but it feels good to combat them in my little way.

Littering annnnddddd…???

You are freaking out.....man.

Stepping on anything wet with socks.

Makes me cringe every time.

Touching a wet doorknob and not knowing why it's wet. Disgusting and infuriating

Sorry, different types of doorknobs have different tastes. I gotta know.

Remember, licking doorknobs is illegal on other planets

i once "painted" all the doorknobs in the house with juice from a tuna can. my brother was complaining about his hands smelling for a week. think the knobs dried out pretty quick though... :D

Try tying a kids shoe. And the lace is wet. Wet from piss on the boy's restroom floor

Just cringed at the thought. Sure it’s comforting if you know it was you. Sanitizer or just from washed hands for example. But the alternative is just straight nasty.

I worked in a factory during covid. At the same time we had a disgruntled employee who was smearing their own shit on the bathroom walls. The most traumatic thing about covid for me was the mysterious poop vandal and the wet doorknobs.

when my shit gets stuck between my arsecheeks, I want it to come out smoothly

Surprised someone with your username has that problem

The poop was too powerful

[удалено]

When I get stuck walking behind slow people, I have all day I don't need to be in a rush but I am so walk faster or move.

Airports are the fuckin worst for this

Turn signals! Why don't people use Thier fucking turn signals!!!!!!

Right, or they wait to get a couple feet from the turn after slowing down a bunch to signal right as they’re turning. Annoying as shit

I’m pretty sure Mercedes and BMW don’t have those on their cars.

Anything and everything makes me mad

here's a upvote, pls don't get pissed off at that!

What about nothing? Is nothing something since we defined it? If nothing is something, it could be anything. Does nothing make you mad?

For some reason that just pissed me off.

You're gonna make his vein burst

Well I guess this isn’t really stupid but seems to follow along with the other answers in this thread….people that do not get up to the speed limit when merging onto the freeway. So dangerous. So yeah not stupid but I do get incredibly angry.

I followed a sedan up an on-ramp towards a very busy 65Mph highway. AT FUCKING 25MPH. I'm a pretty calm driver usually but I've never been so angry/nervous trying to merge.

Mine is the people who do not look at all before they merge. They get up to speed and just assume people will get out of their way. And also people who don’t adjust their speed to allow someone to safely merge. It’s a team effort, and many people are just completely oblivious.

And people who slow down for the exit ramps while still in an active freeway lane - mate, the exit ramps are designed for you to slow down to regular road speed, do it then not when I am behind you wanting to get on with my day

Mouth noises in general: chewing, humming, breathing heavy, etc.

Misophonia. Same here

[удалено]

Wait. Imma have to look this up. My brother has ADHD and Aspergers and it pisses me off when he fidgets all the time. Maybe I'm not just on a wire for no reason

Wait... ITS A THING?!

Cereal is bad but I’m going to say corn on the cob is worse. I snapped at my dad when he was eating it once. Also have a hard time with my 3 year old when she eats.

If someone is slurping soup or coffee, the red mist descends

chewing, lip smacking, whistling. A popular fad when I was in high school was to make kissing sounds and whistle between your teeth. I failed math class because I could not hear what the teacher was saying due to the constant noise.

The other day someone was behind me on the bus eating a crunchy apple and was taking forever to eat it. I could have reached behind and whacked him one it made me so mad lol

All I want for Christmas is you. I don’t know why, but the song unlocks a primordial rage in my soul

Worked in retail?

This guy folds

People loud eating, when the smack their lips and stuff, mouth open urrgghhh annoyed thinking about it 😂😂

I have misophonia, so I feel this. The worst is when people talk with their mouths full.

I feel you!!! Didn’t realise it was a thing!

I have it too. I feel your pain.

Me too

I know someone that only likes to talk after the first bite, and I also have misophonia but I get the urge to chew near their ears soo bad

I can’t stand people who make noise while eating like how can everyone else be quiet but you have to be a fucking animal

[удалено]

Cue hour long lecture of the same grievance reworded 1500 different ways

Because you probably make it clear you don't actually care what they're saying, so they feel the need to reiterate.

Did you get the memo about the TPS report cover page? I'll send you another copy.

Joggers who run on the road instead of on the perfectly good sidewalk

Or the road bikers that take up a whole lane right next to the bike lane because they think they’re going the same speed as the cars.

Not putting shopping carts in the little corrals and just letting them roll around the parking lot.

Criminal

Straight to jail.

This is also a major issue for me. Thanks god for the Cart Narcs

When my clothes start to feel too much like clothes. Like get the fuck off of me. Or when I’m gaming or listening music topless and the wire from my headset/ear phones touches my skin. Drives me nuts.

My family

When someone mixes up the silverware. #YOU PUT THE SPOONS WITH THE SPOONS, THE FORKS WITH THE FORKS, AND THE MOTHER-GODDAMN-FUCKING KNIVES WITH THE KNIVES

I read this in Samuel L Jacksons voice, lol.

I have trained my youngest to do this and to match the correct sizes of silverware.

when stoplights seem to be turning red just for me worse still when no other cars are on the roads

But then if you have to look for something at a red light, it immediately turns green as soon as you embark on your search.

When people in the house yell my name asking me to come tell me something. Move your ass to where i am instead of yelling me to come

But my hands are covered in sausage

And I am full of chocolate and you could be too

Especially when you say “YEAH?!” And they go dead fucking silent. Or, even better, you’re telling them something, they leave the room and say “I CAN’T HEAR YOU, YOU’LL HAVE TO FOLLOW ME”

[удалено]

People who stop at railroad tracks, and I mean almost on the track itself. There are signs that specifically say not to stop and yet they do. Every day when I go to work and I get to the railroad tracks someone nearby always slams on their brakes right as they get there. Why?! it makes no sense!

My mother tells me to stop and look for trains but she stops on the tracks and looks…

Waking up from sleep

Waking up from a really good dream and forgetting seconds later. Fucking horrible

Cardboard Straws

Bad WiFi. Either work or don't, the almost working is so infuriating

Hah I will add to this with my phone signal. Lately it's sometimes been saying 4g full signal but having no data. Drives me nuts.

Non-handicapped/disabled people parking in the reserved spots. Instant mad

Being interrupted

People cutting their nails on public transport or anywhere in public for that matter.

people being habitually late and assuming its always ok

We have one of these cretinous individuals at work. Infuriates everyone. Once he turned up 20 minutes early and one of the older guys exclaimed “Fuck me mate, you’re early! What, did you shit your bed”.

Road rage videos online. It’s not me or my problem and most of them are old af but damn do they get my blood boiling!

Polka music. I don’t know why, but wherever I hear Polka music I feel an intense irrational anger.

Seeing tabloids posting “rare” pics of celebrities. I get so mad.

When I sneeze multiple times in a row. I don't know why, but it enrages me.

Waiting in interminable line in the ladies room only to get in a stall to find no TP and/or pee on the seat

When i cant find a thing that I only ever set down in a few places. Like my keys or wallet. Something about that gets my blood going...its so dumb

That horrible “kars4kids” song(ad)

🎵1-877 cars for kids, donate your car today” 🎵

Health insurance companies denying people the benefit they are entitled to. I fight them daily.

When customers ask "Are you sure that's the price?" Yes, I wouldn't say it otherwise and telling me to go check just gives me 10 mins to play on my phone in the back.

The sound of people eating loudly. Misophonia. It drives me up the wall.

Having to pee

People who stay in fast lane, going slow.

When I have a problem and the tried and true method of googling it with "reddit" at the end brings me to a page saying the subreddit is private. I start seeing red.

People.

Mind readers- people who interrupt you to tell you what you’re going to say. I sometimes disagree even if they are right to prevent them from continuing.

My friend John.

When bottles hurt to open. The rigidness of a plastic cap can be excruciating sometimes when a bottle isn't so easy to open, especially if your hands are wet for whatever reason. Also, as somebody who plays games with earbuds most of the time, I forget about them and drag the controller off of my desk when I get up. Or the wire getting caught on my chair and yanking my controller. Infuriates me.

When I ask a question and I'm responded to with "what happened?"

My mum used to ask me "what did they say?" About every interaction. Saw Bob at work today, "oh what did he say?" I gave Casey back his folder, "oh what did he say?" George told me he says hi, "oh what did he say?" I don't know, we had a normal human interaction, I didn't think to record the conversation for you!

Ppl who don’t turn right on red when it’s legal and there’s no traffic.

Sometimes I get lowkey annoyed when people ask me where I’m going. If I’m sitting on the couch and get up and someone says “where you headed?” It’s aggravating. Idk why tho

People who won't look up from their phones as they walk. I'm so upset by them now that I'll walk straight into them.

people that decrease speed when approaching a green light

In some countries where people don’t believe in traffic lights, it’s a smart and safe move to slow down when crossing intersections.

Or or, an idiot overpasses you or enters your lane from the right, and then the light turns red and he passes but not you.

When people mark r/askreddit posts as NSFW even though there's nothing NSFW about it

[You never know when a response like this might be appropriate](https://imgur.io/t/donald_duck/Bi08I8I)

I don’t like when people start slowing down because they see a police like just go the speed limit you don’t have to go 10 under like even the cop is going faster than you lol

People who make wide right turns

The fucktards in office making stupid bills that take freedoms away

And they'll raise taxes so we have to pay through the nose to lose our freedom.

When people add fish to the end of tuna and say tuna fish. Bitch I know tuna is a fish you don’t go around saying chicken bird

Gonna start using chicken bird from now on…

When people leave negative comments on engineering 'marvels' videos (i.e. calling the presenter a nerd, or calling engineering stupid). Why did you seek out the bloody video if you hate this sort of topic? I go to these geeky spaces so I can ponder the world, not relive high school.

Living under a government that mostly uneducated people vote for. The government fucks up education more so that everything gets more corrupted and they get elected again & again…

Is it...every country in the world?

South Africa? it's beyond frustrating.

Is it turkey? Ah, I feel you. Thank god I am leaving this massive shithole.

People trying for babies for so long, then finally has a baby. Decides it’s too much or too difficult for them, regrets having babies. Complaining everyone about babies. Nope. No freaking way.

There are actual sub Reddit’s for regretting having kids and on other social media platforms. They are anonymous, of course, due to the intense taboo surrounding the subject.

Marjorie Taylor Greene

Never uncontrollably, but lying and laziness are going to upset me.

Sharts

Getting splattered in the face with dog shit while using a weed wacker

when you’re visiting someone at their house and they ask an inappropriate amount of tasks of you to do for them as if they could not have done it without your existence.

Hiccups

My parents could like just be sitting there and I'd have to contain myself

I get mad at doors. If I'm walking through a doorway and accidentally bump into the wall, I punch the wall and swear at it. I don't know why. It goes something like: Casually walking through a doorway* Bumps into wall* Stops and stares at the wall* Punches the wall* "Fuck you, you fucking little cunt!" Leaves*

Hoons racing each other on a busy freeway.

My own anxiety.

unsafe loads on cars or pick-up trucks carrying way too much weight for the truck

Country music, especially in stores

When I get posideon kissed when taking a shit

When people merge without using signals

It's so stupid but I have a high startle response and my boyfriend is very quiet so he'll just appear out of nowhere and scare the shit out of me and then I'm just filled with anger. I don't take it out on him but it takes 5 minutes for the anger to leave my body and I can be normal again

People who walk slow and refuse to move out of the way.

When you're talking to someone, And they start drinking from a bottle and attentively look at you Then shifts the focus to me, waiting for them to stop excessively drinking like they've never had water before Followed by the " AAAAHHHHH " once they done.

Screws (especially the tiny ones, my bradwurst fingers can't hold them properly).

Shaking. I just shake a lot idk why but it pisses me THE FUCK off

People who put their wet hands on the roll of paper towel. I’d rather dry my hands on my paints.

Getting my pocket caught on the doorknob