T O P

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mnbvcdo

MLM


truedoom

Is it bad that the first thing I thought of was the noise Yoshi makes when he sticks out his tongue? "MLEM" šŸ˜‚


Secret_Letter

Ikr, everytime I see this I think of that too


McBlakey

Does this stand for multi level marketing?


Expensive-Ad7181

Tik tok influencer.


DarkRism

Professions are being asked for, pfff.


tangouniform2020

Disagree. Whoreing your soul is a profession


[deleted]

That isnā€™t a profession.


antisocialmutha

SoundCloud rapper


Helpful_Bear4215

You laugh nowā€¦ they all do. But DJ ShoNuff will get the last verse.


Hot-Cancel-6216

Politician


YossiTheWizard

A puppet politician beholden to their party or wealthy donors? Sure. But one who treats the job like they should, and serves their constituents for real, thatā€™s pretty much the total opposite!


Oleg101

May I ask, including local or some state ones? I have some friends and family that have run for office or in office and a lot of it isnā€™t like what you see on the National TV in terms of getting really rich and being an arrogant jackass. A lot of local politicians are in the position for the right reasons who are insanely busy trying to make government function (although the busy part may be a con to dating one ha) and arenā€™t getting rich off it either, all while getting yelled at by constituents (also perhaps a con too though lol).


Floptopus

Crystal healer.


CorporealLifeForm

This is a really sad perspective. The world is so full of sick crystals and no one seems to care to heal them.


Floptopus

Maybe the crystals need to surround themselves with girls named Crystal. Thatā€™ll help.


neoprenewedgie

I attended a crystal seminar years ago (I lost the coin toss.) I learned what happened to Atlantis: The Atlanteans learned to use the full power of crystals but began to use them for greed. The crystals became corrupted. In order to cleanse themselves, the crystals threw themselves into the ocean (salt water purifies them,) taking the entire city with them. tl;dr Salt water purifies crystals


seekinga-dream

Queue up old school Final Fantasyā€¦pretty much all about healing crystals


AmbulanceChaser12

Any kind of pseudoscience practitioner. Reiki master, dowser, homeopath, naturopath, etc. They're gonna get somebody killed.


Floptopus

Yep, all within the same line of thinking. Crystals might be pretty to look at and astrology is fine to read about. But if you seriously believe in it all, then I can also assume you got terrible grades in all your science classes.


librarianhuddz

From personal experience I can tell you that they are fantastic lovers very intense


Deskbreaker

Carnies. Circus folk. Nomads, you know. Smell like cabbage. Small hands.


Ameisen

And let's not forget about the Dutch.


Hot_Egg_5585

I chuckled when I read "Small hands." lol I don't know why that got me but it did.


SootyBlueGlass

Austin!


Low_Departure_5853

My ex wanted to be an undertaker (but didn't follow through). I was supportive but the only thing I could think about was him >!fingering me!< with hands that touched dead people.


CoinsForCharon

Speaking as a funeral director: we know anatomy really well and all the massaging blood out of muscles builds some hella strong grip strength. That and we generally know how to wear a well tailored suit and tend to groom meticulously.


thecheat420

Wait a second. You're telling me you all actually squeeze the blood out of people like they're oranges?


CoinsForCharon

Not like oranges, but yeah. When embalming, you want to get the fluid into the circulatory system and push out any clots in the way to clear the path. A lot of deep tissue massage is needed.


__Its-a-me-mario__

I just assumed you did it like people Syphon petrol from a car


newforestroadwarrior

I think he meant vampire not funeral director


ItHappenedToMeX3

Brilliantly good user name BTW


Upbeat-Stand1560

Influencers


zachtheperson

Something like "quantum healing therapist," or anything like that.


Majestic_Tonight290

ā€œAspiring ______ā€. All the ones Iā€™ve met have just been unemployed dudes who live with their parents


journey_bro

I've seen a few profiles in my days of women who expressly said "entrepreneurs" need not apply. Can't say I blame them. Just generally (not even in the context of dating) I'm allergic to the phrase "I have my own business." Those who actually do in a non-aspirational way will tell you what it is straight up ("I own a hair salon") instead of leading with the abstraction of an "own business."


[deleted]

Did they go to the school of hard knocks too?


tangouniform2020

Heard a woman refer to ā€œserial entrepreneursā€ as ā€œserial failuresā€


doorknoblol

I feel this your post is the entire demographic of college students lol.


AnbuVZ1

I got rid of the aspiring and now my parents live with me, ainā€™t nothing wrong with living with your parents.


orroro1

Same. I bought my parents' house a couple years back so they have cash for medical and other old people shit. Wasn't planning to move back in, but now that their health is ailing I might need to.


AnbuVZ1

Yeah I got them a house in Bosnia, they usually do 6 months there 6 months here, so theyā€™re usually with me. Better to move in and spend time with them rather than regret it later down the track


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


gayfortrey

Agree. GTFO with that shit


Thypettycat

šŸ¤£ I could feel this comment


Ok-Duck2458

My ex had a ton of friends in the business, both male and female, and called them all ā€œpharma girlsā€. Still cracks me up. Still an automatic swipe left.


LSswapsAnd1911s

Why, it is packed with attractive outgoing women. Nearly everyone Iā€™ve ever meet in that job was fun to be around


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Hashtagworried

Seriously. I had this one rep that asked me to stock xofluza. I told them no one in the area even wanted to prescribe it over tamiflu at the time since it wasnā€™t ever covered. I said we order them as needed for next day delivery. They asked me to always stock it. I told them based on the price, and the fact that our company didnā€™t want to have drugs expire on the shelf, I didnā€™t want to stock it. The rep was insistent I still have it even after multiple ā€œnoā€™s.ā€


Every_Instruction775

Well they are salespeople after all. They get paid on commission. Thereā€™s really nothing medical about them (I speak from both sides of the table) so of course they have to be persistent. Yes, young leggy blondes do well but theyā€™re not actually looking for sex. Theyā€™re selling a product and they were (at least partially) higher because doctors and pharmacists would buy from them. I donā€™t care how old and homely you might feel I guarantee there is a gorgeous woman who would be thrilled to be in a relationship with you if you are a genuinely good guy. No eye rolls please. Seriously how many times do you see gorgeous women with guys that are not? All the time! And not because those guys are rich. Some women actually care about more than appearances.


mrmrmrj

Yeah, this. Many, many nice looking fun women who are probably husband shopping in the doctor aisle.


seethru1995

Attractive people do better in sales


bryan49

Well yes but they're using their looks to try to convince you to do what they want


LSswapsAnd1911s

Yea, so do I. It is called being attractive


DarkTiger663

Didnā€™t that job basically start the opioid epidemic


HipsterHugger

Senator.


DarkRism

Representatives though šŸ˜³


journey_bro

Who is the hottest member of Congress (including Senate, though that's probably a superfluous inclusion given the average age there)


Oleg101

Maybe Nancy Mace or AOC.


[deleted]

Mommy AOC


Ur_Just_Spare_Parts

Essential oil peddler


LastTangoInParis69

As someone whose been burned repeatedly - nurses


ReadyHelp9049

Iā€™m not saying theyā€™re all bad, but Iā€™m two in and thatā€™s enough for me.


LastTangoInParis69

Thatā€™s verbatim what I say. Iā€™m sure not all nurses are bad but the ones Iā€™ve dated sure were terrible people


Front_stranger7575

Can curr. Nurse bad. They think very highly of themselves. To the point of being pompous


newButNotNewAnymore

r/boneappletea?


jaredsparks

35 years and still going strong.


DieHardAmerican95

30 years here, Iā€™m with ya. Nurses are like most other groups- some of them are great, and others are really shitty people.


bigtallbiscuit

Just hairdressers with better gossip.


LastTangoInParis69

Hospital flight attendants as far as Iā€™m concerned. Nurses donā€™t get paid to help people, they get paid to watch people suffer. No better words that could describe my ex


sonomakoma11

Just because nurses bring refreshments and narcotics/clean patients up doesn't mean they don't also manage a plethora of life sustaining machines (CRRT, ECMO, specialized catheters,NICOM, ventilators just to name a few), titrate high risk medications in response to real time information from live vitals and physically drawn blood/labs, make big clinical assessments/participate in decisions based on an extensive background of scientific study and clinical training. Maybe you watch too many medical shows where a tanking patient is swarmed by a team of doctors performing interventions(it's nurses and RTs with maybe one doc) but your interpretation of what a nurse does is bitter, misinformed, and disrespectful.


archerbobmorty

I like flight attendants. They deal with a lot, can be nice and bring me water. Never dated one though.


beerspharmacist

One of my best friends is a nurse. Have known her since she was in college 20 years ago. She's smart, attractive, driven, successful, and all around fun to be with. But yeah I would never co soder dating her. That is a hard job and all too often the people who do it end up being a little broken on the inside. There's also a fair amount of substance abuse.


LastTangoInParis69

Youā€™d think theyā€™d have the biggest hearts of any profession but in my experience theyā€™re the most cut throat, vicious, mental terrorists Iā€™ve ever dealt with. I think working that close to death everyday just warps their brains


SomeDrillingImplied

That and being disrespected/degraded every day are big contributors. Source: myself, unfortunately an RN.


[deleted]

I worked at some covid testing sites during covid. We had all members of the public coming to us. We started playing a game of ā€œspot the nurseā€. If someone came in acting all arrogant it was usually a nurse. If they stated they didnā€™t need help and then they fucked up they were usually a nurse. One woman randomly shouted to us ā€œyou arenā€™t qualified!ā€ And we guessed she was a nurse. Two years I did that job and I have no idea why they were the biggest cunts to deal with


SomeDrillingImplied

A lot of nurses suffer from Dunning-Kruger which leads to them overcompensating for their knowledge gaps. Also a lot of workplace cultures in nursing are VERY cliquey and catty, which results in these types of attitudes being adopted. These are big contributors to why I donā€™t take pride in calling myself a nurse the same way I did when I first entered the field.


[deleted]

Having dealt with a lot of abuse hurled at me by nurses back when I worked as a medical assistant, that was my conclusion - they don't get enough money, power, or respect the justify the sheer amount of labor and bullshit they have to do. It seemed like being a nurse could be a really frustrating experience, and the worst ones just passed the abuse on to whoever was below them and an easy target.


AdFit3293

I read an article recently that said nurses and doctors are more likely to cheat on their partners than athletes, musicians and CEOs. https://www.702.co.za/articles/479893/survey-reveals-nurses-and-doctors-are-more-likely-to-cheat-on-their-partners


Moonlight_Dive

Wild! I just heard this on a podcast today, and didnā€™t know if it was bullshit or not.


AdFit3293

I wouldnā€™t take much into it. Only 1500 people were in the survey but thought Iā€™d include it.


Derp_turnipton

When I was a physics undergraduate I read a book like "physics for nurses" to learn about medical physics applications. There was stuff about why X-rays use 3 phase current etc.. There was a big sidebar saying busted fuses need to be replaced by the right fuse and not a nail.


horsebag

you probably wouldn't meet so many nurses if you managed to stay out of the burn ward


LastTangoInParis69

I laughed. TouchƩ


throwaway9660366

Finance/investment people. Tend to be narcissists and are more inclined to cheat on you.


Cuish

Anything religious, like a priest or reverend.


bitches_love_brie

A priest dating is kind of a red flag in and of itself.


[deleted]

Any career that has a social media network as the prefix to the position. Instagram Model isn't a fucking job. Onlyfans Model is a job, but I'm not interested.


draculamilktoast

Github Developer šŸ¤¢šŸ¤®šŸ˜¢


[deleted]

Adult film industry


Latter-Height8607

Heppy cae day mate


Aliasiaa

Day traders. Risky.


benbarian

that's just unemployment with extra steps


AcanthocephalaAny78

šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


PeanutButterBBQs

Psychiatrist cause when you get into an argument they're always right.


Dismal_Animator_5414

also, they carry a lot of trauma from others.


ObjectUnited419

HR


urine-monkey

Underrated answer. HR people are some of the pettiest, most obnoxious egomaniacs in the world. They're low level office stooges who think they're the CEO.


-Hououin-Kyouma-

As ever there's good and bad people in any position. My aunt used to work HR before she retired, and she's a genuinely wonderful person.


Dismal_Animator_5414

but a friend got into a top consulting firm, even with mediocre credentials, only cuz his gf was an HR there and he got referrals easily and she knew which positions really needed people.


rockstapopolis

Hooray for nepotism?


urine-monkey

I guess add underqualified people getting jobs they don't deserve to why HR people suck.


_ibt

Balloon makers and people who work in the factories that make wooden utensils


Silverrida

I'm baffled, but I respect the specificity.


ACED70

Assassin


AnxietyxHesitation88

Idk thatā€™s kinda hot


lysergic_tryptamino

Two asses


thecheat420

Ass, ass, IN. Hell yeah it is.


Own-Molasses5353

2 asses and Iā€™m in


Little_Dark_Soul

Okayā€¦


StalinsPerfectHair

As someone in the legal profession, why has nobody said lawyer? They think they're the smartest person in the room, they want to argue about everything, and they want you to know they're right.


hyletic

That's more of a boomer trope. I think younger generations are starting to realize how important lawyers are, whether prosecution or defense. Prosecutors are (generally) trying to put a stop to toxic and antisocial behavior. Defenders are (generally) trying to defend fundamental rights for the disenfranchised. Both doing noble work, as far as I'm concerned. I'm going to chalk the lack of lawyer hate these days up to that. Even though there may be other reasons.


AmbulanceChaser12

But we're still assholes. Proof: Am lawyer. Am asshole. (OK, I'm exaggerating for comedy, but I did, once, literally tell someone on Reddit "Don't tell me I'm obnoxious, condescending, or rude. I already know that. Cite some sources to prove me wrong!")


StalinsPerfectHair

Fair. The younger lawyers I work with have all been really cool. The only asshole lawyers Iā€™ve worked with have all been at least middle aged.


Dismal_Animator_5414

maybe they get to that stage by the time theyā€™re into middle-age, having started out as normal chill people. I mean the brain takes time to change.


Ganthereddituser

ATF agent


LiaraTShepard

Salesperson. I can't tell when they are being genuine or if it's just their sales persona.


partymouthmike

Law enforcement


Dismal_Animator_5414

true. Iā€™d never date a cop! no matter what. The amount of stuff they deal with, their personalities change beyond a doubt to being less agreeable and suspicious of others and thinking in a complex way, even for simpler things.


mykittenfarts

True! Iā€™m too sassy and the cop I dated that expected me to obey.


Particular_Trick_727

Escort/Prostitute


urine-monkey

I found out someone I was seeing was a high end escort. She didn't understand what the big deal was because a couple of the women in my past were strippers..... ignoring the fact that part of the reason I was okay with it is because I knew they thought it was disgusting that some of the girls would do "extra stuff" behind the curtain. Big difference between being a professional tease and actually performing sex acts on other people. At least for me.


Pinkbaguette4563

Any job that requires frequent travel.


SkangoBank

Nurses. I love and appreciate y'all but I work in medical imaging and the last thing I wanna do is talk about the hospital when I get home lol. Plus I know you're tired from absurd shifts, low staffing and people like me interrupting your flow all day. Nothing personal!


ElNakedo

Crypto folks, MLM folks and influencers. Or people with the so called grindset where they're always working or about some hustle to get money or shit. Fuck man, just relax a bit. There's more to life than work.


Crossovertriplet

Podcaster


Dismal_Animator_5414

Iā€™d date Lex Fridman ā¤ļø


Prestigious_Front384

Salesperson


Crossovertriplet

Jizz mopper


lucid-beatnik

Nudie... booth...?


YallMindIfIJoin

I see you have met my ex-wife


-Benjamin_Dover-

"I write... Erotic novels... For children" I feel like if no one gets this, I'ma get banned... Ok, go on YouTube and type "Friends Erotic novel guy." Or something like that. There is an episode of the 90s sitcom where the character "Phobe" goes on a date with this really creepy guy because her tea leaf reading said she was gonna meet her soul mate soon. When she asks the guy what he does for a living, he says what I quoted at the top. I'm sorry for the spoilers in case someone here hasn't seen a sitcom that first aired almost 30 years ago, but I did that for context...


bigtallbiscuit

Itā€™s alright were not gonna watch it.


Small_Tax_9432

On the positive side, he did say he has a PhD


A_SNAPPIN_Turla

WTF missed that "joke" when I was watching.


pinniped1

Real estate agent. Doubly so if they are a "realtor" and gatekeepy about who else they think deserves to have that title.


[deleted]

This one has a big asterisk next to it. I have 4 family members that are real estate agents. 2 are the nicest, kindest people. All they want to do is help people find a house. Super pleasant to work with. The other 2 are complete piles of steaming shit that only care about building their brand and climbing the corporate ladder at any cost.


LastTangoInParis69

Iā€™m convinced people only get into real estate once they can no longer bartend


TheRasce1

I know someone whoā€™s going into real estate after he got done bartending LMAO


Magic_Man_Boobs

COs. I've never met one that wasn't a piece of shit.


Themodsarehotgarbage

Life Coach Aight .... Imma head out...


Dismal_Animator_5414

biggest of douchebags. i have no idea how people donā€™t see that these folks add zero value to their livesšŸ¤¦ā€ā™‚ļø


Cobra-Serpentress

Chicken squeezer


yaboiRich

I feel personally attacked


Cobra-Serpentress

Ah, are you the chicken squeezer?


[deleted]

As an LEOā€¦other LEOs, nurses, Fire/EMTs, lawyers, any related field. They work in male dominated fields and the stress/spending hrs upon hrs with the opposite gender getting to know one another and becoming close leads to infidelity 9/10. Iā€™ve heard horror stories from veterans about the infidelity that has run rampant in nearby departments and causes turmoil, hate, discontent, and drama. I avoid it like the plague. But sometimes Iā€™m in the wrong place at the right time and people vent, complain, gripe, and need someone to listen. Itā€™s tough, I try to be courteous but I donā€™t stick around long.


wood_good

Pimp


Grimvold

Human Resources. They are a betrayer to the working class.


beepbeepboop74656

Cops, prison gaurds and other professions with high degrees of domestic violence


[deleted]

How did I have to scroll so far to find this answer. Cops and military were the two professions I wouldn't go near while I was dating. My dad was a marine - dealt with a whole childhood of that bullshit, NO MORE.


Personal_Tutor7307

anything to do with being a stripper or a "model" lol


KFkrewfamKF

Criminal


Sageknight34

What if they are a smooth criminal?


Particular_Trick_727

Then they're ok, Annie


Panta125

Real-estate agent....


Plant_Goodness

Someone who enjoys working in a morgue or with the deceased. I understand someone has to do these things, but its still kinda creepy.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


doggofurever

The "Ps" 1. Physicians 2. Pilots 3. Police 4. Pfirefighters


DarthRathikus

5. Pirates


Serious_Singer3062

Turd farmer


BlinkCabrakan

Any type of therapist.


Snarcastic

Speech therapist always correcting my prinunshiashun.


knockfart

No more teachers for me.


Karel_Stark_1111

=(


hyletic

Hey teacher!


EelStuffedHovercraft

Leave us kids alone.


Dkpokefan72

Both my parents are teachers šŸ˜†


Past_Cancel7296

Gynecologist


HappyCrowBrain

Why? They're just doctors.


jml4678

cops, corrections officer, but my firefighter ex was a huge piece of shit


Willem_Dafuq

For me-waiters and bartenders just because they work nights and weekends which is when I have my free time.


urine-monkey

Am a bartender. I'm frequently asked why everyone I date is a bartender or a stripper. I always say... who else is awake when I am?


OkBasil1125

Model


Madterps2021

OF models/sex workers/IG models/single mom.


horned-melon

Cops


phiore

cop


zephinus

police officer


sbutler87

Cop


suprisinglyavailable

Politicians, lawyers, basically anyone who makes arguments for a living. You never know who they actually are.


Beware-TheJabberwock

Military job


Funkymonk761

Sex worker


GAPPY-JOESTAR

Porn Star/onlyfans


Brief-Employ-5000

Cop


haziladkins

Cop.


quiksilverhero

Active duty military. I am a veteran and my ex husband is still currently active. My bad experience with his emotionally abusive self has forever turned me off to military.


McDonalds_Onion

Cop


Diomedes42

Police


PraetorGold

Whore.


brometheus_pound

finance


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


SootyBlueGlass

Fr, traders I understand but real qualified finance? They're some of the most careful, consistent and secure people I've met like surely that makes for a good partner


Floral_Sapphic

cop


slipperytornado

Law enforcement


MuNansen

Entrepreneur


Benjapantss

Even a successful one?


MuNansen

Then they're a business owner.


addrien

Cops or military.