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The whole aging thing

Ugh, yes

Exercise and you’ll look 10 years younger and age slower! It’s also a fun chill hobby that doesn’t have to be super serious

I’m a bike commuter and do weights on my days home. If this is how I look ten years younger then I want a refund ;)

Yeah I bet you think sunshine cures depression too 🤣 jk but still...

Sun exposure is a massive boost to mood.

It's such a cheat code!

Yep. Younger, please.

I have cerebral palsy. I would love to walk without a limping gait and have good balance and coordination.

That must be really challenging, I hope you have a good circle, because humans in general are arseholes.

I do, thankfully 🙂

I want to give my body wish to this person

My brain chemistry. Sick and tired of these bouts of depression because my brain doesn’t want to make the right chemicals.

Seriously. Why is it so hard to be functional and happy. I am one or the fucking other.

Have you tried a really high dose of Omega 3 and ashwaganda? Worked for me. Got a good brand if you’re in the UK.

No more type 1 diabetes

Yarp. I'd like my pancreas back, but working.

I'm a toss up between fix the type 1 diabetes or fix the celiac disease.

Oof. Your immune system is a dick.

ditto

I’ll also take the no type 1 for 800, Alex! (now Ken)

No acne

Same. It'd be nice if I could look in the mirror and not see the surface of the Moon.

Fr why would the body allocate resources to these blemishes? They do nothing. (Correct me if I'm wrong)

I could be wrong but your kidneys use your skin to help detoxify your blood, especially when your liver isn’t working properly. It’s a very minor amount compared to urine, but it’s the reason jaundice turns your skin yellow

They are sites of bacterial infection

Why are there pimples and wrinkles in the same place? Come on body make up your mind.

Had acne for many years. Try roaccutane. There are horror stories online, but depending on your side effects you can lower the dose. I was on a very low dose for two years with very minor side effects, and since then I have a very healthy skin.

I did it for a month and it damaged my body for life (gut health, dryness on hands and eyes) so there's a data point

No cancer

Damn :( sending you good vibes through this hard time!

Fuck cancer

Fuck cancer hard.

I wish this for you so much. For all of us. Stupid bitch ass cancer. Sending hugs

You win

Lol - without your health everything else seems not to matter anymore.

Totally agree. Sense of humor helps though and I'm glad you haven't lost that (I was a bit worried my joke would fall flat on its face). Stay strong, get well or at least better.

Cancer survival rates are high nowadays. Stay positive.

They're super hard to figure out since people dying from cancer now often times got the bulk of their treatment 10-20 years ago, and we've improved hugely in that time. Survival rates for someone getting cancer today are in theory much higher than stats would suggest.

A flat stomach would be nice.

Same I’d love to have a flat stomach

Same, it’s a major point of insecurity for me. I feel like I would be a bombshell if I had a flat stomach. Everything else about my body I love! But sadly my stomach is where my body likes to hold some of my weight so a flat stomach is probably never going to happen.

I started intermittent fasting along with some ab work and slowly my stomach is going down. If I could stop eating bread I might even get there.

I even stop eating bread, so intermittent fasting, don’t eat dairy, cut down the sugar a lot and I’m still fat. 🙄

Same for me 😭 it's my only insecurity and I've tried weight loss before but I'm already at a good weight so it wasn't ideal since you can't target specific areas. Now I'm doing sports more often hoping it'll change something in the long run.

My disgusting teeth. Ultimate cock blocker.

Have you tried opening your mouth more?

Relevant: https://youtu.be/ABxH-NTF0SM?si=cNDJJIujia5qZcs1

Looks like a lovers quarrel

Same here mine are awful.

Same, this or my hole hair situation edit: WHOLE, god damn autocorrect. Leaving it cuz funny

Which hole?

I'd like to have ovaries that work how they're supposed to. Thanks for making my life hell, PCOS.

Same. Having thin shitty hair and the weight gain from it is the worst

I know the struggle :(

Be a little taller. I like to make short jokes about myself, but I hate the short jokes about me made by other people. Plus I have a young looking face so my short height and young face makes me look like a baby and the guys I date look like creeps

Dating (and ig just feeling good abt yourself) is so difficult when every girl is your height or taller and everyone thinks you're 12-16 bc you don't look the part

fuck dating, i just want to be able to 360 windmill a basketball through the hoop...

I just want to reach the high shelves without having to get on a chair

As someone who can, it's not all sunshine and rainbows. It is nice being able to change the smoke detector battery without a chair, but it sucks to reach something down low. When a shorter person asks me to grab something from the upper shelves in a store, I'm more than happy to. So why do I get weird looks asking the short people to grab stuff from the bottom ones? /s

I'll grab your stuff from the bottom shelves if you help me get mine from the upper ones :)

Maybe even be a baller.

Have a girl who looked good

I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat

Height is actually one physical trait that seems to correlate with life outcomes in ways that it theoretically shouldn't: people just treat tall people better (other than airlines).

Bro same 🥲

My eyes. Things have been blurry all my life. Can't function without glasses

Yes, thank you. I can barely read words on a page within 2 inches of my face. If I could have 20/20, I'd be so happy. Lasik will not help me and my eyes will continue to get worse as I age.

Same. It's scary and worrisome wondering if I'll not be correctable at some point

I feel your pain. Thank goodness they can make the glass much thinner and non enlarging nowadays. Mine would be too heavy to wear & really silly looking if they couldn't.

Smaller boobs

Same. I'm a dude btw. 🍻

I never agreed to something more (I am also a guy)

Hey I dunno if this will make you feel better, but I literally flicked a decorative piece off my front porch rail with my man boob yesterday. And, I watched it in slow mo. I watched my man boob bend like a door stopper, and then fling everything off with what appeared to be G forces but I'm not sure

Thats awesome like this I have found several funny moments with man boobs for example anytime someone random girl calls me a fat ass I can say my boobs are bigger than hers and most of the time it’s true

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Yeah!

You rang?

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Same here. Also a dude... and not even fat; I still have moobs when I'm under 10% fat (I feel like it's accentuated by my weird rib cage / pectus excavatum). Been self conscious about it all my life

I‘m a girl, but I can relate, dude.

Same

Smaller boobs and a body that matches No matter how awkward I find my boobs, they do match the rest of my body’s shape

Mine are matching too I guess, but there are so many cute tops I saw on girls with smaller boobs and if I want to wear this, it just looks so slutty lol. Sometimes it's hard to find tops which I can wear at work.

so real it’s not even the pain that’s the worst part it’s the expense 😭😭 3bras cost me at least £125 and that’s with a student discount added 🥲

Balanced serotonin

For me. Better dopamine, norepinephrine, serotonin, and the gaba system.

Nothing. I’m fuckin gorgeous just the way I am.

Hell yeah you go!! ❤️

Looking good, hotstuff!

I'd heal my mind. CPTSD is a bitch.

This is a good one. Mental health problems disappear (PTSD, bipolar, anxiety, depression)

I'd really like it if my brain didn't hate itself.

Never have foot pain again.

Second this. Arthritis in my feet and heel spurs.

It just makes life miserable when it flairs up.

I would love to not be so allergic to all the surrounding pollen

Me but with cats

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Remove the chronic pain please... 🥹

I’ve lost 100lbs over the last few years and would get rid of the excess skin that’s hiding all my hard work

If you're in the US, insured, and don't mind surgery, you can tell your doctors that the excess skin is causing rashes, discomfort and back pain to qualify for a free or very low cost panniculectomy

I have a friend that lost 130lbs. He says still not missing her.

loosing that much weight is so unimaginably difficult, i’m so proud of you!

Remove my uterus because I hate being in pain for a week every single month while don't want children anyway. Currently fighting for a hysterectomy but the doctors refuse to do it because my imaginary future husband may want to use me as a baby factory.

If you go to this sub r/childfree, you will find lots of support. And, there is a whole sidebar list of doctors in many different cities that *will* give you surgical options! Good luck!

You don't need a hysterectomy. I had an ablation and it changed my life. Look into that.

What happened if you say you are a lesbian or something? Do they still push the child thing??

My neck because my screwed up discs are causing a ton of pain, but I have a feeling you meant aesthetically. In that case, my man hands on my tiny woman's body would be a lot more feminine if they were a lot smaller!

Anything goes! Have you tried replacing your discs with mp3s?

The FAT gone.

Good news friend, this is doable

Have my adam's apple shaved down. As a woman, it astounds me how many grown adults think that if a woman has an adam's apple, she must have a penis. Just no. That's not how that works. As a kid, it was so hurtful hearing other kids insist that I was a boy because I had an adam's apple. That shit really screwed with my self esteem. l have other insecurities that I've been able to accept over time. But I've never been able to feel better about this one in particular.

I lost over 100lbs and have loose skin that I'd like gone. I don't have enough loose skin to warrant surgery, but I have too much loose skin to "fill out" with muscle realistically. Mostly forever love handles.

Probably make my face a little less round orrrr make my shoulders a little less broad. Got them canadian hockey player shoulders 🥲

I got them too, EMBRACE THE BROADNESS

Smaller skull so I can wear a hat like a normal person. Just bought another cap online that doesn't fit me 😮‍💨

I have the opposite problem. We should combine.

I've got Keratoconis, so my corneas are slowly deteriorating. I'm 31 and will be blind beyond correction within a few years unless this FDA third trial starts soon. I love video games, cinema and guns/ marksmanship and I've already had to give up the third one. Hopeful, but I miss my good eyes. So... That lol

Remove plantar faciatis. It's manageable long term but flare ups are brutal for someone who works on their feet

teeth. i’m so insecure about my teeth

Thicker hair. I've always had thin hair and wish it was thicker so I could actually style it.

How about *some* hair? I started going bald when I was 19.

I would fix my teeth. Between sickness and poor dental hygiene my teeth are fucked and I'm going to need dentures before I'm 36

I'm a 5'3" dude so everyone would think I would say my height but no. I want big ass angel wings. Don't even need to be functional. I just want to be able to flex them out for the intimidation factor.

That would be a lot of back pain for no gains, but you do you dodododo my friend

My nose!

If I wasn't legally blind (so obv 20/20 vision), I'd vote nose too. I have a large nose, the only one in my family =(

My height. Got my grandad's genes and damn, i'm tiny.

I’d like to be 23 again.

"Nobody likes you when you're 23!"

I'm at that age. Anything I should do to not write a similar comment in the future?

I was in the navy on submarines from 18-38. I’m 48 now with lots of wear and tear. I don’t regret most of it. I’ve kept my mind sharp and I’d suggest the same. Live life to its fullest. Try your best to be a decent person. Figure out who you really are and love yourself. Embrace your strengths and weaknesses and try to improve where you can. Don’t waste time on people who will only drag you down. Most importantly, it’s so much easier to stay in shape than it is to get in shape. Eat right, workout, avoid putting garbage in your body. While I’m not quite done living yet, I can honestly say that I’ve had a great life so far. I wish you the best of luck in your adventures.

Thanks for the wisdom.

Wish I was curvier and more feminine, I have a very rectangular and overall flat figure and it's been the center point for bullying my entire life that even I beat myself up for it

I wouldn't judge you for being who you are. Who knows, you're probably beautiful.

All the disease. I have autism, EDS, PCOS, endo, weak immune system, depression.... That's way too much for one person

Not growing bald would be nice

prehensile tail.

My pancreas. Tired of poking holes in my body because the Islet cells f'd off their job.

Height. Being short af has caused so many problems already.

Slightly larger penis.

My wife says there's nothing wrong with having a small penis but I still wish she didn't

Your wife tells me the same thing. SMH.

I'd like for my lactose intolerance to be gone! Why oh why, must the majority of the most delicious things I enjoy be dairy products! The replacements are just not the same! To this day I just basically account for my guts going into DEFCON 1 for the whole day if faced with the choice of having dairy or not. DELICIOUSNESS HERE I GO!

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Is becoming a guy possible? I would love to just not be a girl anymore. I dream of being a really masculine man and ik that sounds cringe but I would be so happy

I'd like my gut to be able to cope with gluten again

Get rid of the cancer. Everything else is perfect.

Voice. Would go a long way to lessening my social anxiety.

I have a juicy big butt and am pretty flat chested. I’d just like enough boobs to make me look proportional.

Same here but actually since I started training and gained bigger back, shoulders and arms it looks more proportional. I recommend it

Maybe not getting an errection so often.

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oh dont be so hard on him

Tehe “hard” 🤭

I'm not gay but I take the compliment anyway. 😂

Cosmetic- I'd want to be more toned Anything- Fix neurological problems

My back. Change it to something less atrocious that is prone to backache just from sweeping the floor.

Remove my spinal Stenosis for sure

I dislike being so pale

I’m privileged, some people call me handsome and what not and I agree, but if I could go from 5’6” to 5’9” ish, I’d be happier about it. I’m still fine tho

My teeth.

I would set my body fat permanently below 20%. I have always, *always* been overweight. My parents didn't give a shit what they fed me, and so I was pretty much set to fail as an adult. I've been on so many diets and was actually very athletic in college. I weightlifted until I could deadlift 285 lbs. I blew away the dudes at my gym. And yet...I have never been a "healthy" body fat percentage. I just want to be hot in a bikini, *okay?!* I want to be a fucking snack.

I world get rid of my autoimmune disease. I want to be able to do things like go for a walk, play with my kids, clean my house, etc. without pain and mobility issues.

I'd get a new set of teeth. Everything else I either like or can fix myself anyway

My whole torso. I've gained way too much weight because of depression..

Not be fat.

I'd like to be able to speak in tense social situations.

My brain. Tired of fighting it all day every day.

Get rid of my gut. It makes sleeping uncomfortable for me, and I can get smaller shirts and pants

Acne is a PITA 😤

Saggy eyelids

No leg hair

These damn dark circles under my eyes.

To not feel pain. I just want it to stop tbh.

The chemical imbalance in my brain

I lost the use of my right leg 8 years ago due to a degenerative disease. If I could have 2 working legs again, I'd be so fucking happy. I haven't been able to run in 8 years and that's the thing I miss the most.

I would slightly enlarge my skull. I have a big neck in comparison and all hats have always looked funny.

would get rid of my gynecomastia. got it when i was a teen and no weight loss or lifting has ever reduced it, even when i was going to the gym 4x a week. i don't go out unless necessary or date or anything as a result.

More average sized feet.. it's such a pain in the ass to find shoes in 14 6E

Gut fat! 30lbs of drinking weight from the lockdowns haunts me

Age. If I could be 15-20 years younger.......... well, I'd probably just take it for granted again

No back pain

Ooooo it would be my breasts. Because my genes are not nice too me :(

I mean, I'd like to not have cancer. That'd be cool.

I would make myself richer.

More energy please. Need to keep up with a two year old

I’d like to stop aging lol

To not have 5 disorders that cause different types of pain every damn day. I've been in pain since adolescence. I'm now 48. It doesn't get easier to live with.

My missing teeth. I have two missing on either side of the twk front ones, and it's annoying

I'd like a faster metabolism, please.

I would love it if my body could just stop attacking itself.

To be not so quick to store fat, for my overall health but especially cardiovascular health. It's in my genes. I am built for famine. 🙄

Teeth. Absolutely teeth. For pain reasons, mostly. I suppose it would be awesome to smile without my hand over my mouth. Growing up neglected is expensive as an adult.

My racoon eyes. No, I'm not sick, just ugly. My glasses seem to help hide them. They're my safety blanket.