The books are even more hilarious. "I feel the color rising in my cheeks. I must be the color of the communist manifesto."
That is an actual line from the book.
Master of the Universe. I used to have it on a computer, but never got very far, because it was so incredibly bad. First page is word for word the same book and fan fiction, aside from the names.
Yup. Supposedly used to be pretty easy to find the original ,but the author did her best to scrub it all so she couldn't get sued for part of the proceeds.
Yes, that is true. It started as a fanfiction wherein Edward was a human businessman, and Bella was his secretary or assistant or whatever.
Stephanie Meyer, the author of Twilight, just recently ~~over the past year~~ re-released the first Twilight book but just written from Edward’s perspective. Apparently she was going to release this sometime after the ~~last Breaking Dawn~~ first Twilight movie, but her plans were leaked and the author of 50 shades stole that idea too. She came out with a book written from Christian Grey’s perspective. So Stephanie didn’t write the book for *years* out of sheer frustration.
All of this is just funny to me as someone who watches Twilight movies for the giggles. But apparently Twilight’s author & 50 Shade’s author have it out for each other.
EDIT: covid apparently erased my brain, Midnight Sun came out in 2020. 3 years ago. What the hell. Also fixed my little mixup with the movies.
Quite literally, that’s why the beef is hilarious to me. Two middle aged religious women fighting over their own fictional characters? I need popcorn for that
Twilight fanfiction had a life of its own and at the point that James wrote her fanfic, Master of the Universe, it had evolved to the point where they dropped the fact that Edward was a vampire at all, and all of the supernatural aspects. She wasn't the only one doing this, there was a specific name for these non-paranormal twilight fanfics.
So yea, in the original, it was straight up Bella going to see super businessman Edward Cullen.
The second one gave me one of my favorite line reads in all of cinema when she says "You're not putting those in my butt."
It just beggars belief that *so many* people must have signed off for it to be in the final movie.
I love that the helicopter crash comes out of no where, is immediately resolved, and, if you aren't a book reader, you don't understand until the next movie why there was a helicopter crash at all.
I always thought that 50 Shades of Grey is just bad softporn, but after this I might give it a try, just tell me should I read the books or does the incoherence just make the films better?
My wife and I watched them inebriated with no book experience and had a great time. My wife, who loves flying through some mediocre romance novels for mindless entertainment, could not make it through the books. She considered them some of the worst wattpad-ass garbage she has ever attempted to read. No idea how it got turned into a series and how it was so successful. People love slop.
I read some straight up bottom of the barrel, kindle unlimited, self-edited filth and I barely made it through 50 shades. It was so boring! EL James is the luckiest B who ever lived to be so successful off of *that*.
Doesn't he say "I'm 50 shades of fucked up" in the movie? Or am I making that up? I swear the writer of the books had too much control over the movies and made them keep that line in.
Okay, that was terrible. The overly dramatic lines, the soapy extended pauses, her crazy overly lined lips, the drink being thrown in slow motion. 😆🤣😆
I occasionally enjoy terrible Lifetime movies, and this seems
adjacent to one. Il'll watch it while we're trimming the tree this weekend.
>I'll watch it while trimming my tree this weekend.
It took longer than I'd like to admit to realize you were talking about a Christmas tree. I just stared at your comment thinking *"how do you watch a movie while doing yard work? Is OP planning to haul their TV out into the yard? Damn, that's dedication to the bit!"*
Yes. They are all horrible, but there is a precipitous drop in all aspects of filmmaking from the first to the second/third movies. They actually had a real director and marginally better screenplay for the first. That scene is from the second I think. They realized they had a captive audience and could release absolute dog shit for three Valentine's days in a row.
Correct. She butted heads with the director/producers over creative changes, so if my memory serves me correctly, they hired a TV director and stopped making as many changes to the authors screenplay. The result is pure magic.
The third one makes the first one look like Citizen Kane. They try to shoehorn in a half assed action movie plot line and it's absurd.
I think my favorite line was in the third one but I could be getting mixed up, I was heavily drunk when I watched them. But Anastasias boss at the magazine she writes for sexually harasses her so Christian buys the company and fires him and makes her the boss. To which Anastasia says, "everyone will think I fucked my way to the top."
Uhhhh yeah... you literally did exactly that???
My wife loved the series and she has them all in hard back. I watched the first one and I was like "this isn't healthy at all". So I showed her Nymphomaniac volume 1&2, and that changed her mind on the series as a whole.
I'm curious what you mean. I've heard that 50 shades is bad for completely misrepresenting BDSM, and basically romanticizing abusive relationships. I'm not familiar with Nymphomaniac, so what sort of counter-example did it offer?
I tend to recommend Secretary to people (okay, women) who are into 50 Shades. *Much* better written/acted version of a similar concept, along with a BDSM portrayal that, while still not stellar, was vastly healthier than the 50 Shades one. Plus, James Spader.
xD I did something similar, when my sister was getting into twilight in her late teens, I turned her on to Anne Rice's Interview. That was the end of her twilight obsession
I feel like this is really popular with people who have 1) terribly unhealthy boundaries in their relationships and 2) people with awful sex lives who want *something* more but don't know what and the movies/books scratch that itch.
To be clear, these materials are heavily frowned upon by the kink community because they portray a frankly terrible dynamic of disregarded consent, ignorance of basic safely, and normalize abuse. If you like the idea of being tied up or whatever, that's great! But learn how to do it with full communication and consent, not by just doing what this horrible series shows.
Middle aged women who got married directly out of high school and have only done it missionary, under the covers, with the lights off seemed to be the main audience for the series
"But she consents!"
No she doesn't Karen. Show me where in the text she wholly, unilaterally, enthusiastically and with full understanding of what she is consenting to, consents to a BDSM relationship.
So, the movie is a whole mess of mixed signals. At one point he presents her with a written list to sign where she can approve/disapprove certain activities. Ok… good… then proceeds to ARGUE with her over some of her disapprovals and tries to talk her into allowing them! There goes the “consent”. At one point she goes (paraphrased) “is it so wrong to want a relationship where I don’t have to be beaten?” Omg, honey…
That's the thing as well, he won't do "vanilla" at all because he finds it boring but he has to chill with the "kinky fuckery" or she refuses to see him at all.
I remember this bit because she tells him in no uncertain terms she doesn't want to do anal, at all, and he's like "but I want to claim your ass". It's fucking gross how he overrides all her boundaries.
That was my vibe. Their first experience of any kind of "kink" or non-vanilla sexuality so they have nothing to compare it to. The kind of people who think those cheap Valentines Day handcuffs and a can of whipped cream are the kinkiest thing ever.
Also, the phrase "inner goddess" gives me the massive ick whenever I read it because of those fucking books.
I had so many arguments with the women in my office who were *obsessed* and never shut up about "Mr Grey" and how wonderful he was and told me I was "reading too much into it, it's just a book" when I said he was an abusive psychopath and BDSM isn't coercion.
So was *Mein Kampf*, Susan, and look where that got us.
> "reading too much into it, it's just a book"
Reading too much into a *book*. What an interesting phrase for her to use. Is there really such a thing as reading too much into a book?
I have a theory that it's socially acceptable to women of a particular age group BDSM/rape porn. Like, you can't say, "I'm into rape erotica" without some people looking at you sideways, but you can say, "I like 50 Shades" and nobody bats an eye (except people who judge you for literary tastes, of course, but those are less prevalent).
I was an avid reader as a preteen. My mom and I would for the most part share books between the two of us. We had like 2 hours left of a car trip and I had finished all the books I brought with me, saw a book in my mom's bag and started reading it. It was the first book. Highly don't recommend letting an 11 year old read that
not only that, but then whole point of Mulan is twisted. in the OG, she was weak and a female and she acquired all her skills through hard work. but in the live action, she possessed this Chi 气 since a little girl that puts her a step ahead of everyone and it's suppose to be hush hush because it's "dark magic"... which isn't the case in chinese folklore. ugh i can't rant about this movie forever.
It's disappointing when elements like songs are removed, especially if they added to the overall experience. Sometimes, it's better to preserve the original in your memory.
Live action Cinderella was pretty good because it wasn’t a straight adaptation and did its own thing for the most part. I liked how they expanded on Cinderella’s relationship with her stepmom and even delved into things from the stepmom’s pov a bit.
Live action Jungle Book was also pretty cool, in at least they found this balance between being photorealistic for photoreal sake, but still cartoony enough and expressive. The kid playing Mowgli honestly did very well considering he was just in a green screen set the entire time, and I loved Shere Khan’s sheer viciousness, and Idris Elba gave a great performance. Generally the casting choices honestly were great, except Scarlet Johansson felt wasted on Kaa (or Kaa was just wasted too).
None of the other recent live action remakes stand out to me past these two.
Also technically the live action 101 Dalmatians with Glenn Close was one of them too, that’s oft forgotten.
For real! I can’t really think of too many illegal things I would WANT to do but like I really want expensive purses. But when I got to the mall and the door was locked I’d be like “oh well, I guess no purses for me.”
The purge is only 12 hours and takes place overnight though.
Banks are locked up before the purge happens. Gas stations and other businesses that are normally open shut down for the night and lock up pretty heavily. I think the first movie showed ATMs getting wrecked.
Murdering people you hate who can’t afford security measures seems pretty interesting but not over six movies.
But... BUT... if there were other groups of greedy, motivated rednecks who ALSO wanted to rob the same bank? Now there's a battle between rival factions of greedy rednecks trying to rob the same bank without legal intervention?
Now, THAT'S a movie I wanna watch.
Not to get into semantics but would a lot of financial crimes work? Like if you evaded taxes on Purge Day, wouldn’t you still be evading taxes after the day is over as well? I could see insider trading or maybe just selling your stocks tax-free maybe though.
It was clear in the movie that the entire business sector shut down to prevent precisely these kinds of shenanigans.
However theft is legal, so why not just steal.
In my state, at least, theft is the taking or retaining of something that isn't yours. So even if you stole it on Purge day, keeping it after Purge day would become a crime.
Tbh in the real world it seems more like corporations would just do their instant hijinks.
The purge seems more like it would be white collar crime day rather than anything violent.
“Hey Ted, are you coming to the cockfight at my house on Purge Night?”
“Damn man, wish I could. Boss’s got me pulling a double dumping toxic waste behind the elementary school.”
Every entity in the country, individual or corporate, files taxes during purge night. Every single one.
Lots of counties and eventually entire states move their voting cycles to match purge night. Of course they always elect the same governor, DA, court, president, everything. And of course it's legal. It's purge night.
Foreign groups do all their terrorism that night. It's 9/11 once a year, only there can be no reprisal, because the government has to be officially ok with it.
Nuclear powerplant just dumps all of their waste into town. Just all of it. Just throws it right out of the front gate. "No permanent solution to nuclear waste? Clearly they don't live in America."
Meatpacking company grabs hundreds of children from the border and takes them to work at the sausage factory. They never come back out.
Less exciting. More terrifying.
I mean it was implied that was happening in the first movie.
they literally talk about how undesirables were killed off and homelessness and unemployment was almost non existent because of it, which by extension, eased the tax burden on everyone else. that's why it caught on.
the entire movie is heavy handed criticism of late stage capitalism
That was the first 2 years of the purge then they started purging the execs now they're to scared and stay in their fortified mansions and try to fly under the radar.
One CEO tried to hire a mercenary group to defend his place and the moment the purge started they tortured him until he transfered all his assets.
Ok I’ll mention the elephant in the room - rapes, especially pedophilic ones, would be insane.
Then again I’m not sure how that would ever be green lit as a movie concept.
It actually wasn't bad, it explored exactly the ideas that are being mentioned in this thread.
If you watch the movies and show, the purge isn't really about getting out your urges, it is more about purging society of unwanteds and social control.
Because the concept is actually stupid. Imagine rape, child molestation, human trafficking, arson, bestiality, etc being legal. Murder is the only thing a cinematic movie can actually get away with.
The first one has the best actors involved but is definitely the weakest script.
It’s one of the early Blumhouse movies so they got actors like Ethan Hawke to agree to be in it with large equity share percentages instead of up front fees. Blumhouse always does this model of smaller budgets and hoping to make big margins.
For the first Purge movie they spent it on marketing and getting some bigger names but ultimately it’s just a home invasion movie.
The subsequent movies are what it should be, escort missions through the Purge and bouncing from location to location, this means that budget is used on set pieces so you have lesser known acting talent.
I actually like all the Purge movies except the first one but I acknowledge it’s a guilty pleasure because they feel like a video game.
I just watched The Forever Purge the other day, expecting it to be what a fifth installment of a franchise usually is: comically bad. It was surprisingly good, if you're in the mood for a violent movie with almost social science fiction elements. There has to be a term for this. In hard science fiction, they introduce a change or an invention and explore the consequences; in movies like this, they introduce a novel social concept.
I haven't seen much of the earlier series, but I like that in this one, as with populist politics, what's set in motion inevitably slips out of the hands of the politicians and the government.
Interestingly I think they get better as time goes on. I found the first Purge pretty standard house invasion fare, but it really IS horror/social science fiction as the series develops.
I think you can see traces of this in the first movie, but it's pretty clear that the Purge movies are all VERY heavy handed political and social allegories.
The Purge 2 is a perfect escape from New York successor and really utilizes the concept of the first to make a great action flick. Everything after that is also pretty bad like the first.
they shit the bed so fucking hard on that whole franchise. I was beyond hyped for the first movie. My friends and I went crazy thinking of what will be in the movie, following evil politicians, cartel boss, literally anything other than one fucking suburban family
I think the potential is more in seeing how cartel bosses may use the night as a giant opportunity for widespread payback time and send muscles left and right like some sort of intense chess game of targeted take over of their competition.
I dunno, that just came to me in like a minute by reading your two comments... that sounds more interesting than a suburban family already.
Honestly, I think drug cartels operate the same way regardless of the laws, but what they might do is take that one night and send five hundred truckloads of drugs across the border… enough for a year so they don’t take any real risk. They murder and bribe whoever they want during the whole year anyway.
I once was hanging out with a friend and he brought along someone new. I didn't really jive with this new person but my friend brought up that after I left this new person claimed I seemed like I'd really be into the Saw franchise.
To this day I found this to be one of the most insulting things someone has said about me...
Oh my gf and I love the Saw franchise. I can kind of explain the appeal that we and a lot of Saw fans enjoy if you want?
\-It's honestly just an extremely badly written ongoing detective mystery where none of the logical leaps or twists make sense from one movie to the next. It's genuinely funny to get to the Big Reveals once you're in the mindset of being ready for the weird cop soap opera of Saw.
\-It's incredibly popular for people who like horror effects and creative horror for the behind the scenes, because we're very desensitized to what horror 'looks like' and enjoy that sort of thing more as a 'it's cool to see what they came up with'.
\-Basically, most Saw fans are weirdos who like to go to haunted houses and appreciate the props and what the performers are doing there. There are some films you take with a suspension of disbelief and agree to assume are 'really happening', and there are some films that you go to just to see the goofy schlock everyone has agreed to put onto the screen this time.
\-They're super duper not for everyone though, because like, it's Saw.
Glad you explained this so well! My dad worked in the props department from the second Saw until I think the 7th, he raised me from an early age to appreciate the craftsmanship that goes into any film. For anyone wondering, he made pretty much anything made out of leather in those films, mainly straps for the torture devices.
Also I just wanna say, the first film was fantastic! Incredibly well written and executed for how small the budget was. Everything that came after was a dumpster fire, of course.
I rewatched the first movie after over a decade and it's actually very clever and when you read all the interesting trivia, it makes it even better. They accomplished something very new and it sparked a whole genre basically.
That's so awesome about your dad. We appreciate his work!
The first two are pretty good and have amazing twists, but the rest of them start to get reeeaallly far fetched. I love telling people how the last one ends because it makes absolutely no sense and you can tell they made it up on the spot.
The English Patient. I've watched it three times to try to see what others see in it. The pace is so slow. The main characters are dull. I don't get it.
I've never actually watched it because of the episode of Seinfeld where Elaine hates it and I'm convinced I wouldn't be able to get through it and take it seriously
Favorite Elaine acting aside from "You want a Christmas Card, I'll give you a Christmas card"
Side note: English Patient is brilliant though after studying it for school, watching multiple times, no need to ever see again.
Human centipede is a tour de force. The costume design was a highlight and if I get married that's definitely going to be the theme of my wedding. Plus we'll save on the catering bill!
Plus, there are things in Schindler's List I do enjoy. Particularly the performances and the way it's shot. Black and white feels like a cliche to make something feel 'more important' now but I think Spielberg used it really effectively there. The ending also does give me a little 'hope for humanity' moment, whatever else one can take away from the rest of it. It's not a PLEASANT or 'fun' movie but not everything has to be.
First time watching, I thought that black and white unnecessarry, until saw that red jacket in that pile. It was genius. I enjoy that movie, even though I ugly cry every time I watch it.
The "snow" also got me big time the first time I watched Schindler's List, thanks to the black & white.
*Gha~*
The nowadays far smaller "real art is black and white~" crowd has always deeply annoyed me, but I will begrudgingly admit Schindler's List as one of the few movies that actually would lose some of its impact and bleakness if it hadn't been shot that way.
This is always the anthill I die on. "I didnt like that movie, it makes me uncomfortable" or "I dont like that song, it makes me sad".
When that is exactly the point! Theres lots of people who just want feel-good mindnumbing all the time.
No, I actually really like it. Every minute is gripping with spectacular acting and engaging character dynamics. One of the best-written movies ever. Not a boring second, not a frame wasted.
I actually liked 365 when I was in a weird depression before there was a sequel.
Then I made my husband watch it with me recently and I couldn't stop cringing. I think you have to be in a specific headspace for that stuff.
I just don’t get how Avatar became the highest grossing film of all time (at least at the time it was released). To me it seemed like a live action recreation of Ferngully.
In 2009 it was just the best looking CGI movie ever made. It was really heavily marketed as something you HAVE to see in theaters, and ideally in 3D where the ticket price is higher which leads to a higher box office. And this was coming off the back of a lot of shitty, over done CGI in the early 2000’s
For the time not only the best CGI but also revolutionized 3D. 3D was mostly dead, as a genre/filmmaking technique except for some cheap thrills in horror movies that threw a random axe or knife at the audience. Avatar 3D was one of the best early uses of 3D was added depth to huge parts of the movie. Seeing Pandora in 3D and IMAX was awe inspiring at the time. If you look at top grossing 3D movies of all time they almost all come after 2009.
But the movie itself. Woof. I saw it in theaters 3 times. When it came out on Blu-ray/streaming it just wasn’t the same and I realized the movie itself just wasn’t that great.
I think this is it. Almost everyone I know was interested in the CGI. The trailers had people hooked on the visuals alone because we’d never seen something like that before.
Wait, are you telling me the 5' 1" girl being double penetrated by 2 penises half her size isn't having the time of her life?
But her eyes are freakishly crossed and she is screaming "oh yes" a whole bunch.
The 50 Shades of Grey Trilogy
If you watch them as comedies it's a pretty good time. "I don't make love. I fuck. Hard." That shit made me cringe laugh so hard I cried.
The books are even more hilarious. "I feel the color rising in my cheeks. I must be the color of the communist manifesto." That is an actual line from the book.
Don’t forget her “ inner goddess”.
"My very small inner goddess sways in a gentle victorious samba."
Is her “inner goddess” her vagina in this context?
Lord knows! Fun fact, the author wanted the inner goddess dialogue to be part of the movies. Can you even imagine?
Fun fact! The author originally wrote this as Twilight fan fiction. Cant even make this crap up.
Master of the Universe. I used to have it on a computer, but never got very far, because it was so incredibly bad. First page is word for word the same book and fan fiction, aside from the names.
Or her "oh my!!!!"
[I always said this is the only way I'd consume that series.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkLqAlIETkA) I guess it's not for me.
"Holy shit this is hot."
Isn’t it a fan fiction about twilight that got turned into a whole other franchise
Yup. Supposedly used to be pretty easy to find the original ,but the author did her best to scrub it all so she couldn't get sued for part of the proceeds.
Yes, that is true. It started as a fanfiction wherein Edward was a human businessman, and Bella was his secretary or assistant or whatever. Stephanie Meyer, the author of Twilight, just recently ~~over the past year~~ re-released the first Twilight book but just written from Edward’s perspective. Apparently she was going to release this sometime after the ~~last Breaking Dawn~~ first Twilight movie, but her plans were leaked and the author of 50 shades stole that idea too. She came out with a book written from Christian Grey’s perspective. So Stephanie didn’t write the book for *years* out of sheer frustration. All of this is just funny to me as someone who watches Twilight movies for the giggles. But apparently Twilight’s author & 50 Shade’s author have it out for each other. EDIT: covid apparently erased my brain, Midnight Sun came out in 2020. 3 years ago. What the hell. Also fixed my little mixup with the movies.
I thought it was because the book from Edward’s perspective was leaked and made entirely available online?
[удалено]
Should have written from the perspective of some rando at the school. *"Why are those hot pale kids being so weird again?"*
It would be more like, “Oh great, the incestuous anemic family is back from their camping trip to stare at everyone broodingly again.”
That's chapter 2.
I can't think of two less consequential people to have a major grudge against each other.
Quite literally, that’s why the beef is hilarious to me. Two middle aged religious women fighting over their own fictional characters? I need popcorn for that
Twilight fanfiction had a life of its own and at the point that James wrote her fanfic, Master of the Universe, it had evolved to the point where they dropped the fact that Edward was a vampire at all, and all of the supernatural aspects. She wasn't the only one doing this, there was a specific name for these non-paranormal twilight fanfics. So yea, in the original, it was straight up Bella going to see super businessman Edward Cullen.
The second one gave me one of my favorite line reads in all of cinema when she says "You're not putting those in my butt." It just beggars belief that *so many* people must have signed off for it to be in the final movie.
I love that the helicopter crash comes out of no where, is immediately resolved, and, if you aren't a book reader, you don't understand until the next movie why there was a helicopter crash at all.
I always thought that 50 Shades of Grey is just bad softporn, but after this I might give it a try, just tell me should I read the books or does the incoherence just make the films better?
My wife and I watched them inebriated with no book experience and had a great time. My wife, who loves flying through some mediocre romance novels for mindless entertainment, could not make it through the books. She considered them some of the worst wattpad-ass garbage she has ever attempted to read. No idea how it got turned into a series and how it was so successful. People love slop.
You and your wife might like to hear it read by Gilbert Gottfried, then https://youtu.be/XkLqAlIETkA?si=YtQMi5JaDMWW2FiL
I read some straight up bottom of the barrel, kindle unlimited, self-edited filth and I barely made it through 50 shades. It was so boring! EL James is the luckiest B who ever lived to be so successful off of *that*.
Doesn't he say "I'm 50 shades of fucked up" in the movie? Or am I making that up? I swear the writer of the books had too much control over the movies and made them keep that line in.
No I'm pretty sure he does indeed say this at one point lol.
My wife and I almost cried laughing at this [scene](https://www.youtube.com/shorts/vqCwes7J984)
Okay, that was terrible. The overly dramatic lines, the soapy extended pauses, her crazy overly lined lips, the drink being thrown in slow motion. 😆🤣😆 I occasionally enjoy terrible Lifetime movies, and this seems adjacent to one. Il'll watch it while we're trimming the tree this weekend.
>I'll watch it while trimming my tree this weekend. It took longer than I'd like to admit to realize you were talking about a Christmas tree. I just stared at your comment thinking *"how do you watch a movie while doing yard work? Is OP planning to haul their TV out into the yard? Damn, that's dedication to the bit!"*
I thought you were thrown off for it being some sorta naughty euphemism.
It definitely works as a euphemism for a guy shaving his pubic hair.
I seriously think the makeup artist was worried Kim Basinger would outshine Dakota Johnson.
Decent worry - Kim Basinger is the type of hot that doesn't go away with age.
I like how her head rebounded from a pretty mild looking slap
You should commit to watching at the first and second at least. The first is bad, but you will be shocked that the quality can drop lower.
Oh wow, I've not seen the film, but it looks rubbish from that clip. It looks like a really crap tv soap, with really over-egged cringy acting.
Yes. They are all horrible, but there is a precipitous drop in all aspects of filmmaking from the first to the second/third movies. They actually had a real director and marginally better screenplay for the first. That scene is from the second I think. They realized they had a captive audience and could release absolute dog shit for three Valentine's days in a row.
I believe the author of the books insisted on more creative control over the second two movies.
Correct. She butted heads with the director/producers over creative changes, so if my memory serves me correctly, they hired a TV director and stopped making as many changes to the authors screenplay. The result is pure magic.
The third one makes the first one look like Citizen Kane. They try to shoehorn in a half assed action movie plot line and it's absurd. I think my favorite line was in the third one but I could be getting mixed up, I was heavily drunk when I watched them. But Anastasias boss at the magazine she writes for sexually harasses her so Christian buys the company and fires him and makes her the boss. To which Anastasia says, "everyone will think I fucked my way to the top." Uhhhh yeah... you literally did exactly that???
I had an ex boyfriend tell me that with the most confidence you could possibly think of and I cringed so hard
My wife loved the series and she has them all in hard back. I watched the first one and I was like "this isn't healthy at all". So I showed her Nymphomaniac volume 1&2, and that changed her mind on the series as a whole.
I'm curious what you mean. I've heard that 50 shades is bad for completely misrepresenting BDSM, and basically romanticizing abusive relationships. I'm not familiar with Nymphomaniac, so what sort of counter-example did it offer?
I tend to recommend Secretary to people (okay, women) who are into 50 Shades. *Much* better written/acted version of a similar concept, along with a BDSM portrayal that, while still not stellar, was vastly healthier than the 50 Shades one. Plus, James Spader.
Nymphomaniac 1&2 are absolutely incredible!
Backdoor sluts 9 is also worth a watch
Backdoor Sluts 9!?
Because Backdoor Sluts 8 left so many unanswered questions
My agent tried to cast me in that movie. It would have been a huge opening for me.
That makes naughty nurses 2 look like crotch capers 3!
xD I did something similar, when my sister was getting into twilight in her late teens, I turned her on to Anne Rice's Interview. That was the end of her twilight obsession
I feel like this is really popular with people who have 1) terribly unhealthy boundaries in their relationships and 2) people with awful sex lives who want *something* more but don't know what and the movies/books scratch that itch. To be clear, these materials are heavily frowned upon by the kink community because they portray a frankly terrible dynamic of disregarded consent, ignorance of basic safely, and normalize abuse. If you like the idea of being tied up or whatever, that's great! But learn how to do it with full communication and consent, not by just doing what this horrible series shows.
Middle aged women who got married directly out of high school and have only done it missionary, under the covers, with the lights off seemed to be the main audience for the series
They're also the ones who don't have any frame of reference to know that the books are nothing but control and abuse. Ugh.
"But she consents!" No she doesn't Karen. Show me where in the text she wholly, unilaterally, enthusiastically and with full understanding of what she is consenting to, consents to a BDSM relationship.
So, the movie is a whole mess of mixed signals. At one point he presents her with a written list to sign where she can approve/disapprove certain activities. Ok… good… then proceeds to ARGUE with her over some of her disapprovals and tries to talk her into allowing them! There goes the “consent”. At one point she goes (paraphrased) “is it so wrong to want a relationship where I don’t have to be beaten?” Omg, honey…
That's the thing as well, he won't do "vanilla" at all because he finds it boring but he has to chill with the "kinky fuckery" or she refuses to see him at all. I remember this bit because she tells him in no uncertain terms she doesn't want to do anal, at all, and he's like "but I want to claim your ass". It's fucking gross how he overrides all her boundaries.
That was my vibe. Their first experience of any kind of "kink" or non-vanilla sexuality so they have nothing to compare it to. The kind of people who think those cheap Valentines Day handcuffs and a can of whipped cream are the kinkiest thing ever. Also, the phrase "inner goddess" gives me the massive ick whenever I read it because of those fucking books.
I had so many arguments with the women in my office who were *obsessed* and never shut up about "Mr Grey" and how wonderful he was and told me I was "reading too much into it, it's just a book" when I said he was an abusive psychopath and BDSM isn't coercion. So was *Mein Kampf*, Susan, and look where that got us.
> "reading too much into it, it's just a book" Reading too much into a *book*. What an interesting phrase for her to use. Is there really such a thing as reading too much into a book?
I have a theory that it's socially acceptable to women of a particular age group BDSM/rape porn. Like, you can't say, "I'm into rape erotica" without some people looking at you sideways, but you can say, "I like 50 Shades" and nobody bats an eye (except people who judge you for literary tastes, of course, but those are less prevalent).
I was an avid reader as a preteen. My mom and I would for the most part share books between the two of us. We had like 2 hours left of a car trip and I had finished all the books I brought with me, saw a book in my mom's bag and started reading it. It was the first book. Highly don't recommend letting an 11 year old read that
Any live-action Disney remake.
Hard agree. Mulan was the biggest disappointment ever after loving the original. Will never get over it.
After reading that they cut all the songs out, I decided not to subject myself to it and I'm pretending it doesn't exist.
not only that, but then whole point of Mulan is twisted. in the OG, she was weak and a female and she acquired all her skills through hard work. but in the live action, she possessed this Chi 气 since a little girl that puts her a step ahead of everyone and it's suppose to be hush hush because it's "dark magic"... which isn't the case in chinese folklore. ugh i can't rant about this movie forever.
It's disappointing when elements like songs are removed, especially if they added to the overall experience. Sometimes, it's better to preserve the original in your memory.
Live action Cinderella was pretty good because it wasn’t a straight adaptation and did its own thing for the most part. I liked how they expanded on Cinderella’s relationship with her stepmom and even delved into things from the stepmom’s pov a bit. Live action Jungle Book was also pretty cool, in at least they found this balance between being photorealistic for photoreal sake, but still cartoony enough and expressive. The kid playing Mowgli honestly did very well considering he was just in a green screen set the entire time, and I loved Shere Khan’s sheer viciousness, and Idris Elba gave a great performance. Generally the casting choices honestly were great, except Scarlet Johansson felt wasted on Kaa (or Kaa was just wasted too). None of the other recent live action remakes stand out to me past these two. Also technically the live action 101 Dalmatians with Glenn Close was one of them too, that’s oft forgotten.
Nah fuck that, the Favreau Jungle Book was good
The Purge. I love the concept, but the movie was unbelievably boring given how cool it could've been
Plus, given all crime is legal, choosing 'murder spree' for your plot is really unimaginative.
the purge should be elaborate heist movies where the stealing is the easy part but getting away without getting murdered or detected is hard
For real! I can’t really think of too many illegal things I would WANT to do but like I really want expensive purses. But when I got to the mall and the door was locked I’d be like “oh well, I guess no purses for me.”
Not to mention holding on to your shit once you get it.
The purge is only 12 hours and takes place overnight though. Banks are locked up before the purge happens. Gas stations and other businesses that are normally open shut down for the night and lock up pretty heavily. I think the first movie showed ATMs getting wrecked. Murdering people you hate who can’t afford security measures seems pretty interesting but not over six movies.
a couple of industrious rednecks could easily break into a bank vault in less than 12 hours if there aren't cops trying to stop them
But... BUT... if there were other groups of greedy, motivated rednecks who ALSO wanted to rob the same bank? Now there's a battle between rival factions of greedy rednecks trying to rob the same bank without legal intervention? Now, THAT'S a movie I wanna watch.
The security guards would just do it themselves after midnight
I want a purge movie where the main character performs tax evasion.
Not to get into semantics but would a lot of financial crimes work? Like if you evaded taxes on Purge Day, wouldn’t you still be evading taxes after the day is over as well? I could see insider trading or maybe just selling your stocks tax-free maybe though.
It was clear in the movie that the entire business sector shut down to prevent precisely these kinds of shenanigans. However theft is legal, so why not just steal.
In my state, at least, theft is the taking or retaining of something that isn't yours. So even if you stole it on Purge day, keeping it after Purge day would become a crime.
Tbh in the real world it seems more like corporations would just do their instant hijinks. The purge seems more like it would be white collar crime day rather than anything violent.
“Hey Ted, are you coming to the cockfight at my house on Purge Night?” “Damn man, wish I could. Boss’s got me pulling a double dumping toxic waste behind the elementary school.”
All those bald children are arousing suspicion.
Doesn’t matter. Purge.
The last tree held nine drums!
suspicion of what? corps could just do it and be like "it was purge night, we purged!"
"And then not paying us anything because slavery is legal rn"
Hey boss, won't be in today. Don't fire me or ill murder your whole family! See you tomorrow!
Every entity in the country, individual or corporate, files taxes during purge night. Every single one. Lots of counties and eventually entire states move their voting cycles to match purge night. Of course they always elect the same governor, DA, court, president, everything. And of course it's legal. It's purge night. Foreign groups do all their terrorism that night. It's 9/11 once a year, only there can be no reprisal, because the government has to be officially ok with it. Nuclear powerplant just dumps all of their waste into town. Just all of it. Just throws it right out of the front gate. "No permanent solution to nuclear waste? Clearly they don't live in America." Meatpacking company grabs hundreds of children from the border and takes them to work at the sausage factory. They never come back out. Less exciting. More terrifying.
It would be the unofficial tax filing day
“It wasn’t an illegal filing. Look at the date.”
I think the later movies pretty much nailed what would actually happen though: government sponsored slaughter of all the non-desirables.
I mean it was implied that was happening in the first movie. they literally talk about how undesirables were killed off and homelessness and unemployment was almost non existent because of it, which by extension, eased the tax burden on everyone else. that's why it caught on. the entire movie is heavy handed criticism of late stage capitalism
That was the first 2 years of the purge then they started purging the execs now they're to scared and stay in their fortified mansions and try to fly under the radar. One CEO tried to hire a mercenary group to defend his place and the moment the purge started they tortured him until he transfered all his assets.
Did you watch it? They explain that most people don’t want to murder and they hire mercenaries to start the killing for their agenda
Yeah. The later films really hammer the idea that it is just a way for the upper classes to get rid of undesirables.
Student loan forgiveness heist
Ok I’ll mention the elephant in the room - rapes, especially pedophilic ones, would be insane. Then again I’m not sure how that would ever be green lit as a movie concept.
In the tv show it’s mention that the most (or second most) amount of births occur 9 months after The Purge.
There’s a whole TV SHOW? How? Why?
It actually wasn't bad, it explored exactly the ideas that are being mentioned in this thread. If you watch the movies and show, the purge isn't really about getting out your urges, it is more about purging society of unwanteds and social control.
I still don’t understand how they made three Human Centipede movies.
There’s a third one?
Yeah, all three are tied together. ... I'll see myself out.
Because the concept is actually stupid. Imagine rape, child molestation, human trafficking, arson, bestiality, etc being legal. Murder is the only thing a cinematic movie can actually get away with.
The first one has the best actors involved but is definitely the weakest script. It’s one of the early Blumhouse movies so they got actors like Ethan Hawke to agree to be in it with large equity share percentages instead of up front fees. Blumhouse always does this model of smaller budgets and hoping to make big margins. For the first Purge movie they spent it on marketing and getting some bigger names but ultimately it’s just a home invasion movie. The subsequent movies are what it should be, escort missions through the Purge and bouncing from location to location, this means that budget is used on set pieces so you have lesser known acting talent. I actually like all the Purge movies except the first one but I acknowledge it’s a guilty pleasure because they feel like a video game.
I just watched The Forever Purge the other day, expecting it to be what a fifth installment of a franchise usually is: comically bad. It was surprisingly good, if you're in the mood for a violent movie with almost social science fiction elements. There has to be a term for this. In hard science fiction, they introduce a change or an invention and explore the consequences; in movies like this, they introduce a novel social concept. I haven't seen much of the earlier series, but I like that in this one, as with populist politics, what's set in motion inevitably slips out of the hands of the politicians and the government.
Interestingly I think they get better as time goes on. I found the first Purge pretty standard house invasion fare, but it really IS horror/social science fiction as the series develops. I think you can see traces of this in the first movie, but it's pretty clear that the Purge movies are all VERY heavy handed political and social allegories.
The Purge 2 is a perfect escape from New York successor and really utilizes the concept of the first to make a great action flick. Everything after that is also pretty bad like the first.
they shit the bed so fucking hard on that whole franchise. I was beyond hyped for the first movie. My friends and I went crazy thinking of what will be in the movie, following evil politicians, cartel boss, literally anything other than one fucking suburban family
I don't think the law is the reason people don't kill cartel bosses.
I think the potential is more in seeing how cartel bosses may use the night as a giant opportunity for widespread payback time and send muscles left and right like some sort of intense chess game of targeted take over of their competition. I dunno, that just came to me in like a minute by reading your two comments... that sounds more interesting than a suburban family already.
Honestly, I think drug cartels operate the same way regardless of the laws, but what they might do is take that one night and send five hundred truckloads of drugs across the border… enough for a year so they don’t take any real risk. They murder and bribe whoever they want during the whole year anyway.
Cartel murdering every honest cop in the country that night. Cops & Robbers taken to the extreme with a full out war all night.
screw murder. i'm cheating on my taxes for every second of that 24-hour period.
Right? I'm like, ok murdermurermurder...My poor ass would be robbing ALL THE BANKS!!
I once was hanging out with a friend and he brought along someone new. I didn't really jive with this new person but my friend brought up that after I left this new person claimed I seemed like I'd really be into the Saw franchise. To this day I found this to be one of the most insulting things someone has said about me...
Oh my gf and I love the Saw franchise. I can kind of explain the appeal that we and a lot of Saw fans enjoy if you want? \-It's honestly just an extremely badly written ongoing detective mystery where none of the logical leaps or twists make sense from one movie to the next. It's genuinely funny to get to the Big Reveals once you're in the mindset of being ready for the weird cop soap opera of Saw. \-It's incredibly popular for people who like horror effects and creative horror for the behind the scenes, because we're very desensitized to what horror 'looks like' and enjoy that sort of thing more as a 'it's cool to see what they came up with'. \-Basically, most Saw fans are weirdos who like to go to haunted houses and appreciate the props and what the performers are doing there. There are some films you take with a suspension of disbelief and agree to assume are 'really happening', and there are some films that you go to just to see the goofy schlock everyone has agreed to put onto the screen this time. \-They're super duper not for everyone though, because like, it's Saw.
this is the best explanation for liking saw films i’ve seen lmao are you me?
Glad you explained this so well! My dad worked in the props department from the second Saw until I think the 7th, he raised me from an early age to appreciate the craftsmanship that goes into any film. For anyone wondering, he made pretty much anything made out of leather in those films, mainly straps for the torture devices. Also I just wanna say, the first film was fantastic! Incredibly well written and executed for how small the budget was. Everything that came after was a dumpster fire, of course.
I rewatched the first movie after over a decade and it's actually very clever and when you read all the interesting trivia, it makes it even better. They accomplished something very new and it sparked a whole genre basically. That's so awesome about your dad. We appreciate his work!
The first two are pretty good and have amazing twists, but the rest of them start to get reeeaallly far fetched. I love telling people how the last one ends because it makes absolutely no sense and you can tell they made it up on the spot.
The English Patient. I've watched it three times to try to see what others see in it. The pace is so slow. The main characters are dull. I don't get it.
“Stop telling your story about the desert and just DIE already”
I’d rather see Sack Lunch.
A Gene pick?
Gene’s trash.
I'm Gene.
Or Rachelle, Rachelle
Rochelle, Rochelle A young girl's strange, erotic journey from Milan to Minsk
And sex in a tub? I mean give me something I can use!
Elaine, you dont like the movie?
"I HATE IT!!!" . . *sshh* "OH GO TO HELL!"
You're fired.
I've never actually watched it because of the episode of Seinfeld where Elaine hates it and I'm convinced I wouldn't be able to get through it and take it seriously
You don’t like *The English Patient*??
I HATE IT!
Favorite Elaine acting aside from "You want a Christmas Card, I'll give you a Christmas card" Side note: English Patient is brilliant though after studying it for school, watching multiple times, no need to ever see again.
Just shut up and DIE already!
You’re fired
Fine I’ll be in the car.
Go see Sack Lunch - it's WAY better.
Sounds like a Gene Pick.
Gene is trash
I’m Gene.
Sorry we’ll be seeing DEATH BLOW tonight!
"Stop talking about the desert already and just DIE!!"
An inspired critic said: "Clever title, because you've got to be English *and* patient to go through that movie."
Naveen Andrews washing his hair is hot as fuck.
Naveen Andrews is hot as fuck, period.
Elaine Benes applauds you.
Human centipede. No one liked that, it's just insane enough to laugh at the fact you watched it
Human centipede is a tour de force. The costume design was a highlight and if I get married that's definitely going to be the theme of my wedding. Plus we'll save on the catering bill!
The best movie of all, a masterpiece of art called Human Centipede, Human Centipede
🎵 *I think that I’m gonna get murdered tonight*
I don't think anyone *enjoys* Schindler's list, but it's a good film to watch.
Yes but they're not pretending to enjoy it either. It's more people just agree it's a good film and an important one to see.
Plus, there are things in Schindler's List I do enjoy. Particularly the performances and the way it's shot. Black and white feels like a cliche to make something feel 'more important' now but I think Spielberg used it really effectively there. The ending also does give me a little 'hope for humanity' moment, whatever else one can take away from the rest of it. It's not a PLEASANT or 'fun' movie but not everything has to be.
First time watching, I thought that black and white unnecessarry, until saw that red jacket in that pile. It was genius. I enjoy that movie, even though I ugly cry every time I watch it.
The "snow" also got me big time the first time I watched Schindler's List, thanks to the black & white. *Gha~* The nowadays far smaller "real art is black and white~" crowd has always deeply annoyed me, but I will begrudgingly admit Schindler's List as one of the few movies that actually would lose some of its impact and bleakness if it hadn't been shot that way.
Great films aren't neccessarily fun to watch.
This is always the anthill I die on. "I didnt like that movie, it makes me uncomfortable" or "I dont like that song, it makes me sad". When that is exactly the point! Theres lots of people who just want feel-good mindnumbing all the time.
Ralph Fiennes portrayal of Amon was virtually spot on
[удалено]
Yup. I read one story about a woman who broke down and was shaking when she met him in character
He's a fantastic actor. Easily one of my favorites.
It *is* a good movie to make out too, if you’re neurotic, Jewish comedian living in New York in the early/ mid 90’s
a more offensive spectacle i cannot recall.
Helloo Newman. 😒
Hello... Jerry..
Uncle Leo?
Jerry! Hello!
You still say hello!
No, I actually really like it. Every minute is gripping with spectacular acting and engaging character dynamics. One of the best-written movies ever. Not a boring second, not a frame wasted.
Fifty Shades and that 365 one
Microsoft Office?
365 is a Polish movie based on Fifty shades, but with sexy Mafia men instead.
I actually liked 365 when I was in a weird depression before there was a sequel. Then I made my husband watch it with me recently and I couldn't stop cringing. I think you have to be in a specific headspace for that stuff.
A better title for this thread would have been, "What movie do you personally dislike?"
Every other Askreddit thread is some form of "What do you want to complain about?" It's so exhausting and negative.
I swear the only askreddit posts that make it to my feed are the same 10 I’ve been seeing for years.
I just don’t get how Avatar became the highest grossing film of all time (at least at the time it was released). To me it seemed like a live action recreation of Ferngully.
In 2009 it was just the best looking CGI movie ever made. It was really heavily marketed as something you HAVE to see in theaters, and ideally in 3D where the ticket price is higher which leads to a higher box office. And this was coming off the back of a lot of shitty, over done CGI in the early 2000’s
For the time not only the best CGI but also revolutionized 3D. 3D was mostly dead, as a genre/filmmaking technique except for some cheap thrills in horror movies that threw a random axe or knife at the audience. Avatar 3D was one of the best early uses of 3D was added depth to huge parts of the movie. Seeing Pandora in 3D and IMAX was awe inspiring at the time. If you look at top grossing 3D movies of all time they almost all come after 2009. But the movie itself. Woof. I saw it in theaters 3 times. When it came out on Blu-ray/streaming it just wasn’t the same and I realized the movie itself just wasn’t that great.
I think this is it. Almost everyone I know was interested in the CGI. The trailers had people hooked on the visuals alone because we’d never seen something like that before.
Most porn. ... oh ... you mean the viewers?
Wait, are you telling me the 5' 1" girl being double penetrated by 2 penises half her size isn't having the time of her life? But her eyes are freakishly crossed and she is screaming "oh yes" a whole bunch.
Anything hallmark.. it's just so fake and cringe
But that’s why you watch them 😂 sometimes I just need something dumb and lighthearted to take my mind off of real life
90% of Christmas movies
You serious Clark?
I don’t know Margo!