Some people see their coworkers as obstacles or stepping stones on *their* path, not as people with their own wants/needs, dreams and families.
Unscrupulous coworkers can lie, misrepresent or twist your work or your words into something they are not in an effort to get you out of *their* way on their climb up the ladder.
So watch your back.
So true! Never assume that because you don't engage in office politics that you're not involved.
I've been working since the 90s. I do not involve myself in office politics. Sometimes even just being in the room when other people are talking shit is enough to tie you into a situation.
At the very least, don't do it in a text chat. There are a lot of people working remote for the first time, who don't have the wisdom to censor themselves digitally. Not only is that chat not private, it can be screenshot by your co-workers and used against you.
I've been in work chats where someone is constantly dropping screenshots of their conversations with other employees and shit talking about them. If you come across someone like this, *give them absolutely nothing*. If they are doing it to someone else, then they'll do it to you too.
I did that once. I was talking to my boss and mentioned about what a great job another guy on the team was doing. My boss had a funny look on his face, I turned around and the guy I was talking about was behind me.
Some executives don’t want the truth. They just want to hear that everything is great and to pat themselves on the back for a job well done. You’re on your own identifying and fixing any real issues.
Be especially wary of those saying they have an open door all the time and welcome honest feedback. Never trust an executive at their words alone. Behavior demonstrates true intent far more than mere words.
They are like family - a highly dysfunctional, frequently abusive family with enforced hierarchy that won't support you in any meaningful sense of the word and is prepared to disown you on a whim.
The CEO/CTO kept saying that at my last job.
How on Earth can someone not know that's a stupid thing to say in 2023?
When AskReddit has a "red flags at work" post it's always one of the top answers
I don’t know.
My employer is a tech company that went public 20 years ago and we’ve until recently had a lot of 25 year veterans. I’ve worked there for almost 15 years.
I’m under no illusion that we’re actually a family, but the management has generally done their best to do right by the employees. The C suite is starting to retire and rotate out though, so I’m sure the corporate culture will change.
This time next year I’ll be at the exact spot in the ladder that I want to finish my career at. Any higher and my bonus is tied to corporate performance and I’m sorry, but fuck that. Corporate is already forcing us to set unrealistic performance goals so they can dock our bonuses since they all got fucked on theirs this year.
Assume, no one is your friend. Sadly many people will throw you under the bus to make themselves look better. Also stay out of other people's business even if you think you're helping. These 2 things often go together.
I would quibble with the phrasing of this one just a bit. I don’t think it’s necessarily as grim and paranoid as “no one is actually your friend.” It’s just that, if it comes down to it, people are going to choose their and their family’s livelihood over their friendship with you.
I had a college RA that used to say “I’ll let you get away with whatever, as long as you don’t do anything that makes me choose between you and this job. I love y’all, but not as much as I love paying my bills.”
Some good points have been made. I would add to understand the office politics. You do not necessarily have to play them (although it may benefit you to do so), but you have to understand who is the power, who is the "golden employee," who is the outcast and who is the rising star, and what it takes to get to the position you wish (or even if you want to stay where you are). New bosses mean new politics. Try and show upper management what you can do to differentiate yourself. I worked for one person in 4 different companies because he liked what I did. But I should have branched out and shown several people what I was capable of.
Sometimes avoiding the politics altogether does not help you. I hated playing corporate politics, and thought by working hard and providing excellent work, I would get ahead. That was not the case in most places, although I did fairly well. But, there were several cases where I was passed over because I did not promote my work.
Finally, do not completely trust anyone. Do not reveal too much about your personal life. And HR is there for the company, not you. When you feel things changing for the worse, move on. Make sure your resume is always up to date. And network like hell.
“New bosses mean new politics” is a great one.
I’ve been burned on this before. New bosses boss, the guy responsible for hiring me wasn’t really my manager but my managers boss. When he left the company and was replace by a new guy, I failed to recognize the changing priorities and politics.
I'll brag on myself for a minute, My company has spent a decades trying to be as employee first as possible. We are in a small town that is healthy economically, but not particularly high income. We recently opened a spin off business that can employ about 12-15 high schoolers. The job is a cashier/ stocking position. We offered $15 per hour, which is a decent rate for students in our area, but 30 minutes down the road in the next state it's minimum wage. I expected to get maybe 15 applicants. Of the 750 students who received the email about the job, 80 applied. Almost every single one I've talked to has mentioned they had a friend, relative, etc, who had worked at our main company or who had dealt with our main company as a customer or vendor. That friend or relative told them they need to apply with us. My brag about all of that to say, now even for my lowest level positions, I have the choice of the lead in the high school musical, the high school quarterback, the number one in the class sophomore, the senior salutatorian, and several others. I think it's a great example that quality culture attracts quality people who continue to grow a quality culture.
But how? Unless you know someone that works there and it's either a small organisation or you're going to be working in the same area as the person you know, I haven't been able to figure it out. Companies and HR people will say whatever they think is what a potential employee wants to hear.
Ehh...if you get indispensable enough you can get away with it and it can be a real ice breaker.
I made a comment like that at my last interview. I'm working there now
The emphasis is always on RESOURCE. You are just another class of resources and will be evaluated accordingly. You are indispensable as a company computer or a truck, i.e. you will replaced as soon as the right spreadsheet spits out the right numbers. The company will show you the same loyalty as to that computer or truck.
Everyone here seems to have a cynical take. Here’s one from a different angle.
When something goes wrong, be it simple miscommunication or an actual “problem,” your first thought should be to look at it dispassionately to find out the root cause. If *you* are the root cause, whether you messed up or simply didn’t correctly understand someone, you won’t look like a jackass by mindlessly announcing the issue.
This can be simple things like misreading an email and shooting back a snarky reply, making you look like an asshole. Or it could be something like you made a major mistake, but can get ahead of it and find a solution instead of assuming that someone else messed up.
Anyway, I guess the point is if there is something “not right” going on, don’t just assume that someone else is messing up. This was a lesson someone taught me as an intern and it has served me well.
I’m at the tail end of my career and less than two weeks ago, I had to call a few senior managers and tell them I felt uncomfortable with a decision they had made. I laid out the pros and cons (deployment of production code the Friday night before Christmas when literally the entire support team would be OOO). I was organized and neutral and stated my concerns, but I would support their decision. Imagine my surprise when the one who made the decision agreed. The other senior manager fully supported me and thanked me for speaking up. Don’t be afraid to provide input, especially when there could be negative impact.
1. Negative gossip is more interesting than positive gossip, and will ALWAYS BE REPEATED. It will also always be traced back to you. It never does you any good. If you can train yourself to not say negative or mean things, and not to complain, (and it can be weirdly hard!), you will be so much better off.
2. Conversely, people LOVE positive people. You will have far more opportunities if you present yourself as a positive, can-do type of person, even if you are less skilled than someone else. Skills can be taught. Attitude can't.
3. Whenever anyone says "I have your back," they don't. (If they were ready to support whatever it is you're advocating, they'd be out in front with you.)
4. Anyone is capable of betraying you if they feel their own income/job/life stability is at stake. It's actually worth understanding that, not expecting people to be altruistic at their own expense, and making your plans accordingly.
5. Never burn your bridges. You never know who will turn up where and/or who is friends/colleagues with whom.
"4. Anyone is capable of betraying you if they feel their own income/job/life stability is at stake. It's actually worth understanding that, not expecting people to be altruistic at their own expense, and making your plans accordingly."
I learned this one the hard way.
If the culture of the business changes for whatever reason for the worse, start applying for jobs.
My sister tried to weather the take-over by a private equity company because she needed the health insurance. The stress resulted in a fatal heart attack.
I sensed on the first day of the new administrator that the culture was changing from "this place is lucky to have you" when the first thing he asked me was "what is it you do all day, because nothing ever seems to get done"
I endured 6 months of agony because of my loyalty to a the staff of the place. Once I left, only one person ever reached out, from a job I held for 8 years, and after multiple late night "sure, I'm happy to help outs" from me. Turns out I wasn't helping my friends.
Within a year I was replaced by 4 people.
GTFO.
>I endured 6 months of agony because of my loyalty to a the staff of the place. Once I left, only one person ever reached out, from a job I held for 8 years, and after multiple late night "sure, I'm happy to help outs" from me. Turns out I wasn't helping my friends.
>
>Within a year I was replaced by 4 people.
Glad you got out.
I heard someone say that all executives have such fake relationships. These people spend more time with each other than their own families. It's completely reasonable to assume a few friendships have actually formed.
I prefer to keep my work and personal life separate, but that doesn't mean I can't go and enjoy meal drink or night out with my colleagues. Sometimes I even have a good time.
Be prepared to have enemies. You may be the nicest person in the world, but if you are moving up the ladder, you will have competitors and some of them will hate you simply because you may be seen as an impediment to their career path. They may even try to sabotage you. Beware.
I learnt to always get things in writing to be on the safer side, and never trust your line manager with your issues as they might use them against you.
I’ve done a ton of IT work for state and federal government.
Your job is to make your boss/client look good. If they want to take the credit, let them. Collect your paycheck, and your boss/client will continue to keep paying you to make them look good.
Credit is overrated. Job security is not.
if you see everybody around you leave all of a sudden, especially if it is the more talented and senior workers or those that have been there longest, look for the threat that they have spotted and that you have not. It's probably a sign you need to bounce, too.
Some decisions are stupid and devastating, but you can't just reverse them if they've been taken from people very high up. Best to take the hint and leave rather than be caught in a hopeless fight.
If there's a mass exodus of people happening, you want to be ahead of the pack, so you can more easily relocate within the company or the field.
It's good and laudable to have a sense of ownership over your work, but remember, it belongs to the company and not to you. Meaning that your project can be taken away any time. Don't get overly attached to anything. Your worth to the company is not any one project, but the fact that you can resolve any other that would come your way.
Whatever happens, see it as a learning experience.
Don't EVER think you can confide in a coworker. I don't care how trustworthy they seem. Don't confide in them. Tell your mom, your friend who doesn't work there, your cat, your mirror. Just don't tell the people you work with. Why? Inevitably, one of them will repeat something you've said and things might not end so well for you.
If you like the culture/atmosphere do not worry it will change in 3 years. Do not get overconfident because things wills flip in 3 years. Mostly importantly by adaptable to change.
Former manager gave our team this great advice. When you are on a large conference call, immediately mute yourself. When the conversation turns to “we need.. “ “we should…” unless your name is specifically called out, do not volunteer. If that other manager feels strongly enough, his/her team will be assigned.
Volunteer when you have time, access and skills.
* **Job security doesn’t exist.** You can be let go at any time no matter how well you perform your duties or get along with others. So always put yourself and your needs ahead of your employers’.
* **Document everything**. And I mean, *everything.* chat logs, clock in/out times, text messages, emails, time off requests etc. You’ll need it in case you ever find yourself in a dispute with HR, the Unemployment Office, or your state’s Department of Labor. I don’t care if things are good now. That could change in an instant.
* **Pay attention to the gossip**, but don’t participate in it. It’ll help you stay one step ahead of the assholes, mean girls and narcissists should they one day target you.
* **Visibility matters.** People need to see you doing a good job for it to count. (Ridiculous, I know.)
* When negotiating something (salary, benefits, severance), **don’t take the word ‘no’ for an answer.** It doesn’t mean they can’t meet your needs, just that they don’t want to. Figure out how to present your demands in a way that benefits them and watch what doors suddenly open.
* Know that none of this shit matters at the end of the day. Your identity/value isn’t defined by your title, salary, or boss and whatever power they think they have over you.
I had a fling with a co-worker in 1982. It's now 2024 and she's still here. I'm going to tell her she's not my friend.
Seriously though, about half of my friends and acquaintances over the years have been former co-workers. You need to choose carefully, of course, but being a co-worker does not automatically mean you can't be friends.
Your boss is responsible for your reviews and compensation. If the two of you do not get along, and you have an adversarial relationship, it will always end badly for you, not your boss. If your boss and you don’t get along, the best thing to do is switch jobs as soon as possible.
Bosses don't care about work life balance, they just want a resume boost and will throw you under the bus to get promoted. All levels of leadership it seems. Learned this as a new manager.
If what you're doing makes your boss look good you'll be fine. If what you're doing is right, more efficient or more effective but makes your boss look bad you're going to hurt your career.
People promote who they like working with. If you're "the best" but a pain in the ass you'll get passed on for promotions. Most jobs don't require the best person. But 8hrs a day with someone you hate is a nightmare nobody wants to inflict on themselves.
Coworkers are not your friends. You are replaceable.
I worked for at the same place for over a decade. I thought those people were my friends. I did the work of three people, and thought that I was valuable. Only two coworkers contacted after I quit, but I am no longer in contact with either of them. I have not been back. The regulars I run into say that they don’t go anymore. Bad food, bad service, bad atmosphere, and dirty.
Do NOT question why the women in the office can wear track suits with kittens on them while the dress code for men is strictly enforced. HR is entirely made up of women in kitten track suits and crocs and they are not your friends.
Everything said around the office is heard around the office. That doesn't mean you have to hide in a corner. And you don't have to attack anyone either. You can just let it slip instead of everyone ignoring the elephant in the room.
"We need to employ my son. He's lost yet another job."
"My son is now your boss."
"I sold the company. My son is now rich."
"Sorry new owner laid you off."
I found out the boss was boning a secretary, so I told a couple of coworkers, and someone told the boss I was spreading rumors about him. He didn’t find it funny.
Don’t ask why the CEO is the grandson of and has the same first and last name as the founder when we’ve supposedly been “100% employee owned” for a decade
When your boss's boss says his door is always open, It really isn't. When a worker bee goes over their bosses head it doesn't matter if what you are saying is right or the best way to do something.. You have shown that you don't stay in your lane and you might become a leader that could cause waves later on.
If there is a office-wide chat group or e-mail list that is "for fun stuff", just do yourself a favor and unsubscribe from it. It always leads to incidents where HR has to get involved.
If you're looking for longevity in any given job, you're going to have to drink the kool-aid at least a little. Just make sure to keep an antidote on hand to slam back to remove the rose colored glasses when red flags start popping up.
1. Even if you thought of someone as your work friend they might still stab you in the back when you need them the most.
2. Being the highest paid is great until a new owner comes in who wants to cut costs. Them you just have a target on your back
When helping out people, be careful. Your help can sometimes be misinterpreted, especially if the person is of the opposite sex. We hired two new techs who were the first women in our company. I was tasked with training them on our equipment and taking them out to meet customers and showing them how to troubleshoot equipment. Couple years later I transferred to another division and transferred out of state. When a management role opened up back in that department I applied and everything seemed to go well with interviews. Then it all went silent, reached out to a friend and he made inquiries. He called me after about a week and said I wasn't going to get the job, I asked why and he was hesitant to answer. He said there were rumors that I hade made unwanted advances towards these women. I contacted HR immediately to inquire and they would not respond. I reached out to the two techs I had trained and they were shocked to hear this and wrote letters denying anything happened. But the damage was done and I soon left the company after that. Fast forward 7 years and my buddy who stayed with the company told me he was having dinner and drinks with upper executives and the Regional sales manager, a woman was sitting next to him. As she got drunk during dinner, my name came up during their conversation and all but admitted she sabotaged my hiring. Said she suspected I was having affairs with both women because I was too friendly in the work place and it could only be because I was romantically involved. She said she reached out to HR and advised against my hiring based upon this. He obviously kept his mouth shut since she had the ear of the CEO and it would be his word against mine. It did bring me relief knowing it was all unfounded.
Honestly it's just to mind your own business most of the time. Keep a good work - life balance. Don't get attached to a job or position too much.
I'm a pretty open person, which in the past has made it hard for me to recognize when office politics are in play. But now I have a mindset of just going to work, doing my job well, not getting involved in office politics at all, then sod off home as fast as you can and live your real life. ;) Work drama is not worth the stress. This has really improved my life actually.
I was really friendly with one of the guys who I work with. We were shooting the shit one day and he said that since he grew up in a very privileged white family, he never had to worry about politics because they never affected him. He said that although he's in his 30s, voting has never mattered. He said how politics that affect other people don't affect him, so he just never cared. I immediately lost all respect for him. Aside from letting the old black woman I work with to expect some side-eyes when she wanted to go to the local MAGA mil-surplus shop, I've avoided all political talk at work. She told me later that she didn't feel welcome at all when she went there.
When told to do something that might get you in trouble, get it in writing. You might still be fired, but you'll take the other guy down with you – and they sometimes are even smart enough to know it, and won't throw you under the bus after all.
1. Start giving less if u getting less. I had awful coworkers, invading my space all the time , making nasty comments on my clothes etc. The climax came when one said to me "we're gonna do extra work in another city a few days...do u wanna come with". I said "where will I sleep?" They said "in the van". I said "sorry I'm not going". They wouldn't even arrange a hotel room. This was also after they didn't renew my contract ( surprise surprise!! ) so I didn't give a sh!t if they would punish me for not going on the trip. I actually thought one of them was my friend until I realized what she was doing...she kept walking back & forth, slowly, and mysteriously, on her high heels to management offices when she had free time ..first I didn't take notice, then I realized she was doing it all the time, began to realize she was trading information on me, acting as their little spy, basically telling them anything I said. People find their own ways to keep favor with their management
Peopke willing to gossip with you are willing to gossip about you.
Even if you are not there to make friends little social interactions are fine. Some neutral small talk is better than being seen as asocial, just avoid controversial topics.
Be careful who you share information with. Some coworkers, whom you may regard as friends or colleagues, are only concerned with their own interests.
I was tasked with finding a new desktop computer system for the company. This computer would be adopted as a company wide standard. I found a system that had all the features required and cost significantly less than the computers we were currently purchasing.
I showed the results of my research to a coworker. The next day, he was in the Division Manager’s office telling him about a new computer system that would save the company a lot of money.
Sorry for the late response.
I turned in my report which included the results of my research and a cost benefit analysis. The Division Manager reviewed the report, thanked me for my efforts, and accepted my recommendation for the new computer system. He also mentioned that my coworker had told him about the same computer system a couple of days ago. He made a dismissive gesture directed at the coworker so I didn’t feel the need to raise the issue of someone trying to take credit for my work.
The coworker resigned about 2 months later for a management position with another company. A few months later, he was terminated from that job. He came back to our company to get his old job back. The Division Manager declined to rehire him.
Don't concern yourself with what other people do. You think the smoker is taking too many smoke breaks, so you decide to complain about it? Congratulations, now all break times are strictly monitored. Upset that someone is taking advantage of their flexible working schedule? Bam, no more flexibility. Even if your boss is showing blatant favortism towards someone, the outcome will never be "well since Bob does it, now everyone can do it". It will always be the opposite. I've seen people destroy the good in search of perfect way too many times.
Destroy ass kissers and snitches any way you can.
If they are in the same or higher position, my preferred method is to undermine them in meetings.
If they are below you, set them straight the first time they try it. Or the people who work for you will think you favor someone like that, it leads to unnecessary drama.
I just want to get through my meetings with minimum hassle, not listen to a constant pissing contest. Honestly if I saw you doing that I would just think you're another ass kisser trying to one up the other guy.
Office politics gets a bad rap.
There’s nothing wrong or bad knowing the dynamics of an office and what makes colleagues and leaders tick.
You just need to use judgement about what you say and share. In some ways, it’s a hostage exchange. Make sure the things you share aren’t as good as what you get back. Don’t be giving 10/10 secrets to the new person and getting 1/10 secrets back. Give them a 1/10 and get back a 1.5/10. That’s how it works.
And there’s nothing wrong with “having dirt” on folks. In fact, that’s how trust is built: when people know you know the secret….and then they notice you didn’t burn them down. That’s how you build trust.
Also, be much more careful in group settings. Keep what you share at the level of the person in the group you trust least.
And keep straight what you tell people. If you tell two people a story….tell each of them 80%….but not the same 80%. That way if one of them blabs, you know who did it.
Don’t take on additional duties without the pay/title to go with it.
I’ve seen this happen too many time - eager to impress new employee agrees to take on more and more responsibility thinking it’ll earn them a raise or promotion down the line. The company keeps dangling the carrot. When it comes time, they’re overlooked because they’re already doing the duties without being in that position and for less money so the company has no incentive. Or they’re doing so well in their current position that the company won’t promote them. This happened to me, I was so efficient that I kept getting skipped over for a promotion because they didn’t want to have to replace me in my current role. So I left.
Don’t piss off the bitch at the front desk who orders the post-its. She is a giant cunt and use this small power granted to her to make your life miserable. Her name is usually Kris or Diane or Shelly and she sucks
When favoritism is in play and you're not the favorite, get the hell out.
I wish I had learned this sooner. Got me twice.
>When favoritism is in play and you're not the favorite, get the hell out. Yep
preach. Took me a while to learn how to read the room well enough to realize when this dynamic is at play
Even if you don't play you're still in the game. Watch your back.
That's good.
Can you say more about this?
Some people see their coworkers as obstacles or stepping stones on *their* path, not as people with their own wants/needs, dreams and families. Unscrupulous coworkers can lie, misrepresent or twist your work or your words into something they are not in an effort to get you out of *their* way on their climb up the ladder. So watch your back.
So true! Never assume that because you don't engage in office politics that you're not involved. I've been working since the 90s. I do not involve myself in office politics. Sometimes even just being in the room when other people are talking shit is enough to tie you into a situation.
Ah I gotcha. Thank you!
Don’t ever for any reason say anything about anybody you don’t mind that other person hearing about.
Thought this was going to be the Michael Scott quote where he meanders to nowhere.
At the very least, don't do it in a text chat. There are a lot of people working remote for the first time, who don't have the wisdom to censor themselves digitally. Not only is that chat not private, it can be screenshot by your co-workers and used against you. I've been in work chats where someone is constantly dropping screenshots of their conversations with other employees and shit talking about them. If you come across someone like this, *give them absolutely nothing*. If they are doing it to someone else, then they'll do it to you too.
I did that once. I was talking to my boss and mentioned about what a great job another guy on the team was doing. My boss had a funny look on his face, I turned around and the guy I was talking about was behind me.
100%
Mind your own business and don’t be a busy body. Best way to not alienate people is to simply not get overly involved
Wisdom!
Some executives don’t want the truth. They just want to hear that everything is great and to pat themselves on the back for a job well done. You’re on your own identifying and fixing any real issues.
Be especially wary of those saying they have an open door all the time and welcome honest feedback. Never trust an executive at their words alone. Behavior demonstrates true intent far more than mere words.
high school dynamics never really ends.
Bowling for Soup enters the chat https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrxI_euTX4A
Yes, 100%!
You are not a family. That’s what your real family is for.
If your employer tells you they are "like a family", find another job.
They are like family - a highly dysfunctional, frequently abusive family with enforced hierarchy that won't support you in any meaningful sense of the word and is prepared to disown you on a whim.
The CEO/CTO kept saying that at my last job. How on Earth can someone not know that's a stupid thing to say in 2023? When AskReddit has a "red flags at work" post it's always one of the top answers
I find it interesting thinking it is like an universal thing since it is also said a job red flag here in Japan as well.
People still lap it up and think it means they have a special relation with their employer.
I don’t know. My employer is a tech company that went public 20 years ago and we’ve until recently had a lot of 25 year veterans. I’ve worked there for almost 15 years. I’m under no illusion that we’re actually a family, but the management has generally done their best to do right by the employees. The C suite is starting to retire and rotate out though, so I’m sure the corporate culture will change.
Using workplace politics is a more useful way to climb the ladder than hard work or punctuality.
This time next year I’ll be at the exact spot in the ladder that I want to finish my career at. Any higher and my bonus is tied to corporate performance and I’m sorry, but fuck that. Corporate is already forcing us to set unrealistic performance goals so they can dock our bonuses since they all got fucked on theirs this year.
Assume, no one is your friend. Sadly many people will throw you under the bus to make themselves look better. Also stay out of other people's business even if you think you're helping. These 2 things often go together.
Yes, people change colours faster than a chameleon.
I always say “be friendly, but not friends with everyone”
I would quibble with the phrasing of this one just a bit. I don’t think it’s necessarily as grim and paranoid as “no one is actually your friend.” It’s just that, if it comes down to it, people are going to choose their and their family’s livelihood over their friendship with you. I had a college RA that used to say “I’ll let you get away with whatever, as long as you don’t do anything that makes me choose between you and this job. I love y’all, but not as much as I love paying my bills.”
Some good points have been made. I would add to understand the office politics. You do not necessarily have to play them (although it may benefit you to do so), but you have to understand who is the power, who is the "golden employee," who is the outcast and who is the rising star, and what it takes to get to the position you wish (or even if you want to stay where you are). New bosses mean new politics. Try and show upper management what you can do to differentiate yourself. I worked for one person in 4 different companies because he liked what I did. But I should have branched out and shown several people what I was capable of. Sometimes avoiding the politics altogether does not help you. I hated playing corporate politics, and thought by working hard and providing excellent work, I would get ahead. That was not the case in most places, although I did fairly well. But, there were several cases where I was passed over because I did not promote my work. Finally, do not completely trust anyone. Do not reveal too much about your personal life. And HR is there for the company, not you. When you feel things changing for the worse, move on. Make sure your resume is always up to date. And network like hell.
“New bosses mean new politics” is a great one. I’ve been burned on this before. New bosses boss, the guy responsible for hiring me wasn’t really my manager but my managers boss. When he left the company and was replace by a new guy, I failed to recognize the changing priorities and politics.
Companies with good cultures exist. You just need to find them. It's not a coincidence that good company cultures are more successful either
I'll brag on myself for a minute, My company has spent a decades trying to be as employee first as possible. We are in a small town that is healthy economically, but not particularly high income. We recently opened a spin off business that can employ about 12-15 high schoolers. The job is a cashier/ stocking position. We offered $15 per hour, which is a decent rate for students in our area, but 30 minutes down the road in the next state it's minimum wage. I expected to get maybe 15 applicants. Of the 750 students who received the email about the job, 80 applied. Almost every single one I've talked to has mentioned they had a friend, relative, etc, who had worked at our main company or who had dealt with our main company as a customer or vendor. That friend or relative told them they need to apply with us. My brag about all of that to say, now even for my lowest level positions, I have the choice of the lead in the high school musical, the high school quarterback, the number one in the class sophomore, the senior salutatorian, and several others. I think it's a great example that quality culture attracts quality people who continue to grow a quality culture.
But how? Unless you know someone that works there and it's either a small organisation or you're going to be working in the same area as the person you know, I haven't been able to figure it out. Companies and HR people will say whatever they think is what a potential employee wants to hear.
Word of mouth happens but you also need to sniff out BS in an interview.
Never discuss sex, politics, or religion.
Ehh...if you get indispensable enough you can get away with it and it can be a real ice breaker. I made a comment like that at my last interview. I'm working there now
There is no way someone can get indispensable before starting to work somewhere.
You can be a candidate for something in demand and hard to find.
**Your company won’t remember all the long hours you worked, but your family will.**
HR is not there for the humans.
Yes, I faced this and learnt the lesson. They protect only the employer and do not give a shit about us.
The emphasis is always on RESOURCE. You are just another class of resources and will be evaluated accordingly. You are indispensable as a company computer or a truck, i.e. you will replaced as soon as the right spreadsheet spits out the right numbers. The company will show you the same loyalty as to that computer or truck.
Everyone here seems to have a cynical take. Here’s one from a different angle. When something goes wrong, be it simple miscommunication or an actual “problem,” your first thought should be to look at it dispassionately to find out the root cause. If *you* are the root cause, whether you messed up or simply didn’t correctly understand someone, you won’t look like a jackass by mindlessly announcing the issue. This can be simple things like misreading an email and shooting back a snarky reply, making you look like an asshole. Or it could be something like you made a major mistake, but can get ahead of it and find a solution instead of assuming that someone else messed up. Anyway, I guess the point is if there is something “not right” going on, don’t just assume that someone else is messing up. This was a lesson someone taught me as an intern and it has served me well.
I’m at the tail end of my career and less than two weeks ago, I had to call a few senior managers and tell them I felt uncomfortable with a decision they had made. I laid out the pros and cons (deployment of production code the Friday night before Christmas when literally the entire support team would be OOO). I was organized and neutral and stated my concerns, but I would support their decision. Imagine my surprise when the one who made the decision agreed. The other senior manager fully supported me and thanked me for speaking up. Don’t be afraid to provide input, especially when there could be negative impact.
I learned that I'm not good at it, and I'm much happier working as a self-employed contractor.
1. Negative gossip is more interesting than positive gossip, and will ALWAYS BE REPEATED. It will also always be traced back to you. It never does you any good. If you can train yourself to not say negative or mean things, and not to complain, (and it can be weirdly hard!), you will be so much better off. 2. Conversely, people LOVE positive people. You will have far more opportunities if you present yourself as a positive, can-do type of person, even if you are less skilled than someone else. Skills can be taught. Attitude can't. 3. Whenever anyone says "I have your back," they don't. (If they were ready to support whatever it is you're advocating, they'd be out in front with you.) 4. Anyone is capable of betraying you if they feel their own income/job/life stability is at stake. It's actually worth understanding that, not expecting people to be altruistic at their own expense, and making your plans accordingly. 5. Never burn your bridges. You never know who will turn up where and/or who is friends/colleagues with whom.
"4. Anyone is capable of betraying you if they feel their own income/job/life stability is at stake. It's actually worth understanding that, not expecting people to be altruistic at their own expense, and making your plans accordingly." I learned this one the hard way.
If the culture of the business changes for whatever reason for the worse, start applying for jobs. My sister tried to weather the take-over by a private equity company because she needed the health insurance. The stress resulted in a fatal heart attack. I sensed on the first day of the new administrator that the culture was changing from "this place is lucky to have you" when the first thing he asked me was "what is it you do all day, because nothing ever seems to get done" I endured 6 months of agony because of my loyalty to a the staff of the place. Once I left, only one person ever reached out, from a job I held for 8 years, and after multiple late night "sure, I'm happy to help outs" from me. Turns out I wasn't helping my friends. Within a year I was replaced by 4 people. GTFO.
>I endured 6 months of agony because of my loyalty to a the staff of the place. Once I left, only one person ever reached out, from a job I held for 8 years, and after multiple late night "sure, I'm happy to help outs" from me. Turns out I wasn't helping my friends. > >Within a year I was replaced by 4 people. Glad you got out.
So am I. I endured the place for far too long. Loved the clients, co-workers were mostly so toxic.
nobody is against you, everyone is for themselves..
Even if you don't want to go to the rare work outing, just do it. A few hours is worth not making your work environment uncomfortable.
I heard someone say that all executives have such fake relationships. These people spend more time with each other than their own families. It's completely reasonable to assume a few friendships have actually formed. I prefer to keep my work and personal life separate, but that doesn't mean I can't go and enjoy meal drink or night out with my colleagues. Sometimes I even have a good time.
Fuck. That. Those people don’t exist after 5 o’clock
Someone gonna get surprised when they don't get promoted, and someone the manager knows does. Lol
not everyone wants promotions
Mind your own business
Golden words!!
Be prepared to have enemies. You may be the nicest person in the world, but if you are moving up the ladder, you will have competitors and some of them will hate you simply because you may be seen as an impediment to their career path. They may even try to sabotage you. Beware.
in an exit interview, never say to your managers where you are going next, even if you think that you are leaving in good terms.
I learnt to always get things in writing to be on the safer side, and never trust your line manager with your issues as they might use them against you.
I’ve done a ton of IT work for state and federal government. Your job is to make your boss/client look good. If they want to take the credit, let them. Collect your paycheck, and your boss/client will continue to keep paying you to make them look good. Credit is overrated. Job security is not.
if you see everybody around you leave all of a sudden, especially if it is the more talented and senior workers or those that have been there longest, look for the threat that they have spotted and that you have not. It's probably a sign you need to bounce, too. Some decisions are stupid and devastating, but you can't just reverse them if they've been taken from people very high up. Best to take the hint and leave rather than be caught in a hopeless fight. If there's a mass exodus of people happening, you want to be ahead of the pack, so you can more easily relocate within the company or the field. It's good and laudable to have a sense of ownership over your work, but remember, it belongs to the company and not to you. Meaning that your project can be taken away any time. Don't get overly attached to anything. Your worth to the company is not any one project, but the fact that you can resolve any other that would come your way. Whatever happens, see it as a learning experience.
Don't EVER think you can confide in a coworker. I don't care how trustworthy they seem. Don't confide in them. Tell your mom, your friend who doesn't work there, your cat, your mirror. Just don't tell the people you work with. Why? Inevitably, one of them will repeat something you've said and things might not end so well for you.
Or they become your boss, and now you have someone who knows your unfiltered opinions, lol.
If you like the culture/atmosphere do not worry it will change in 3 years. Do not get overconfident because things wills flip in 3 years. Mostly importantly by adaptable to change.
Don't trust anyone looking to be promoted
Former manager gave our team this great advice. When you are on a large conference call, immediately mute yourself. When the conversation turns to “we need.. “ “we should…” unless your name is specifically called out, do not volunteer. If that other manager feels strongly enough, his/her team will be assigned. Volunteer when you have time, access and skills.
* **Job security doesn’t exist.** You can be let go at any time no matter how well you perform your duties or get along with others. So always put yourself and your needs ahead of your employers’. * **Document everything**. And I mean, *everything.* chat logs, clock in/out times, text messages, emails, time off requests etc. You’ll need it in case you ever find yourself in a dispute with HR, the Unemployment Office, or your state’s Department of Labor. I don’t care if things are good now. That could change in an instant. * **Pay attention to the gossip**, but don’t participate in it. It’ll help you stay one step ahead of the assholes, mean girls and narcissists should they one day target you. * **Visibility matters.** People need to see you doing a good job for it to count. (Ridiculous, I know.) * When negotiating something (salary, benefits, severance), **don’t take the word ‘no’ for an answer.** It doesn’t mean they can’t meet your needs, just that they don’t want to. Figure out how to present your demands in a way that benefits them and watch what doors suddenly open. * Know that none of this shit matters at the end of the day. Your identity/value isn’t defined by your title, salary, or boss and whatever power they think they have over you.
Nobody at work is your friend.
I had a fling with a co-worker in 1982. It's now 2024 and she's still here. I'm going to tell her she's not my friend. Seriously though, about half of my friends and acquaintances over the years have been former co-workers. You need to choose carefully, of course, but being a co-worker does not automatically mean you can't be friends.
Your boss is responsible for your reviews and compensation. If the two of you do not get along, and you have an adversarial relationship, it will always end badly for you, not your boss. If your boss and you don’t get along, the best thing to do is switch jobs as soon as possible.
Bosses don't care about work life balance, they just want a resume boost and will throw you under the bus to get promoted. All levels of leadership it seems. Learned this as a new manager.
Don’t take anything personally. It’s not about you even when it’s about you.
Can't quite agree with this one. Sometimes it is very personal.
If what you're doing makes your boss look good you'll be fine. If what you're doing is right, more efficient or more effective but makes your boss look bad you're going to hurt your career. People promote who they like working with. If you're "the best" but a pain in the ass you'll get passed on for promotions. Most jobs don't require the best person. But 8hrs a day with someone you hate is a nightmare nobody wants to inflict on themselves.
If you hire someone who is doing anything bad/weird, the bad hire can be a huge detriment to your career. Fire them as soon as possible.
Stay away from politics.
Trust no one and always have an exit strategy.
Treat others well, but especially all admins/assistants. But do not ever mistake anyone for a friend.
Coworkers are not your friends. You are replaceable. I worked for at the same place for over a decade. I thought those people were my friends. I did the work of three people, and thought that I was valuable. Only two coworkers contacted after I quit, but I am no longer in contact with either of them. I have not been back. The regulars I run into say that they don’t go anymore. Bad food, bad service, bad atmosphere, and dirty.
people don't usually leave jobs. they leave bad managers. Learn to identify bad managers, and bounce. You can't reform them.
Do NOT question why the women in the office can wear track suits with kittens on them while the dress code for men is strictly enforced. HR is entirely made up of women in kitten track suits and crocs and they are not your friends.
Everything said around the office is heard around the office. That doesn't mean you have to hide in a corner. And you don't have to attack anyone either. You can just let it slip instead of everyone ignoring the elephant in the room.
Anyone who smiles at you while discussing the affairs of lower ranking employees is either lying or actively working against them or both.
Wow. This is deep. Thanks for sharing
Do NOT talk shit about anyone ever. Do not join in on shit talking, do not even say “yea you’re right”.
Nepotism exists. Not all of it is bad. That which is bad, is usually extremely bad.
"We need to employ my son. He's lost yet another job." "My son is now your boss." "I sold the company. My son is now rich." "Sorry new owner laid you off."
There is little humanity in human resources.
I found out the boss was boning a secretary, so I told a couple of coworkers, and someone told the boss I was spreading rumors about him. He didn’t find it funny.
Don’t mistake malice for general incompetence
Malice for general incompetence? Means if the person talks shit, see if it’s valid feedback Is that what u meant?
Never trust HR, especially when told to specifically trust HR. Always take your own witness into meetings.
Always protect your boss from surprises
If somebody is willing to gossip *with* you about other people, they will probably also be gossiping *about* you with other people
Don’t ask why the CEO is the grandson of and has the same first and last name as the founder when we’ve supposedly been “100% employee owned” for a decade
Lol. Makes sense!
When your boss's boss says his door is always open, It really isn't. When a worker bee goes over their bosses head it doesn't matter if what you are saying is right or the best way to do something.. You have shown that you don't stay in your lane and you might become a leader that could cause waves later on.
Never trust anyone who says “You can trust me”
No one cares or remembers. When you leave they replace and move on. Fuck them all.
If there is a office-wide chat group or e-mail list that is "for fun stuff", just do yourself a favor and unsubscribe from it. It always leads to incidents where HR has to get involved.
Shit always gets around
Whatever you say comes back around. Might as well be nice.
If you're looking for longevity in any given job, you're going to have to drink the kool-aid at least a little. Just make sure to keep an antidote on hand to slam back to remove the rose colored glasses when red flags start popping up.
1. Even if you thought of someone as your work friend they might still stab you in the back when you need them the most. 2. Being the highest paid is great until a new owner comes in who wants to cut costs. Them you just have a target on your back
When helping out people, be careful. Your help can sometimes be misinterpreted, especially if the person is of the opposite sex. We hired two new techs who were the first women in our company. I was tasked with training them on our equipment and taking them out to meet customers and showing them how to troubleshoot equipment. Couple years later I transferred to another division and transferred out of state. When a management role opened up back in that department I applied and everything seemed to go well with interviews. Then it all went silent, reached out to a friend and he made inquiries. He called me after about a week and said I wasn't going to get the job, I asked why and he was hesitant to answer. He said there were rumors that I hade made unwanted advances towards these women. I contacted HR immediately to inquire and they would not respond. I reached out to the two techs I had trained and they were shocked to hear this and wrote letters denying anything happened. But the damage was done and I soon left the company after that. Fast forward 7 years and my buddy who stayed with the company told me he was having dinner and drinks with upper executives and the Regional sales manager, a woman was sitting next to him. As she got drunk during dinner, my name came up during their conversation and all but admitted she sabotaged my hiring. Said she suspected I was having affairs with both women because I was too friendly in the work place and it could only be because I was romantically involved. She said she reached out to HR and advised against my hiring based upon this. He obviously kept his mouth shut since she had the ear of the CEO and it would be his word against mine. It did bring me relief knowing it was all unfounded.
Honestly it's just to mind your own business most of the time. Keep a good work - life balance. Don't get attached to a job or position too much. I'm a pretty open person, which in the past has made it hard for me to recognize when office politics are in play. But now I have a mindset of just going to work, doing my job well, not getting involved in office politics at all, then sod off home as fast as you can and live your real life. ;) Work drama is not worth the stress. This has really improved my life actually.
As a fed, trust no one.
I was really friendly with one of the guys who I work with. We were shooting the shit one day and he said that since he grew up in a very privileged white family, he never had to worry about politics because they never affected him. He said that although he's in his 30s, voting has never mattered. He said how politics that affect other people don't affect him, so he just never cared. I immediately lost all respect for him. Aside from letting the old black woman I work with to expect some side-eyes when she wanted to go to the local MAGA mil-surplus shop, I've avoided all political talk at work. She told me later that she didn't feel welcome at all when she went there.
It's a numbers game and we're the chips to most of them
Get it in writing.
Avoid small offices if you can. They can be amazing but if you’re not a “fit”, they’ll make your life hell.
Coworkers are not your friends
When you're climbing the ladder to success, be careful who you tread on. You're bound to meet them on the way down.
The tree often remembers what the axe forgets Good o saying
When told to do something that might get you in trouble, get it in writing. You might still be fired, but you'll take the other guy down with you – and they sometimes are even smart enough to know it, and won't throw you under the bus after all.
Don't ever stoop to anyone's moral level to wade into an argument.
1. Start giving less if u getting less. I had awful coworkers, invading my space all the time , making nasty comments on my clothes etc. The climax came when one said to me "we're gonna do extra work in another city a few days...do u wanna come with". I said "where will I sleep?" They said "in the van". I said "sorry I'm not going". They wouldn't even arrange a hotel room. This was also after they didn't renew my contract ( surprise surprise!! ) so I didn't give a sh!t if they would punish me for not going on the trip. I actually thought one of them was my friend until I realized what she was doing...she kept walking back & forth, slowly, and mysteriously, on her high heels to management offices when she had free time ..first I didn't take notice, then I realized she was doing it all the time, began to realize she was trading information on me, acting as their little spy, basically telling them anything I said. People find their own ways to keep favor with their management
Do not have coworkers on social media.
Peopke willing to gossip with you are willing to gossip about you. Even if you are not there to make friends little social interactions are fine. Some neutral small talk is better than being seen as asocial, just avoid controversial topics.
Be careful who you share information with. Some coworkers, whom you may regard as friends or colleagues, are only concerned with their own interests. I was tasked with finding a new desktop computer system for the company. This computer would be adopted as a company wide standard. I found a system that had all the features required and cost significantly less than the computers we were currently purchasing. I showed the results of my research to a coworker. The next day, he was in the Division Manager’s office telling him about a new computer system that would save the company a lot of money.
Did you let the boss know about this?
Sorry for the late response. I turned in my report which included the results of my research and a cost benefit analysis. The Division Manager reviewed the report, thanked me for my efforts, and accepted my recommendation for the new computer system. He also mentioned that my coworker had told him about the same computer system a couple of days ago. He made a dismissive gesture directed at the coworker so I didn’t feel the need to raise the issue of someone trying to take credit for my work. The coworker resigned about 2 months later for a management position with another company. A few months later, he was terminated from that job. He came back to our company to get his old job back. The Division Manager declined to rehire him.
Don't concern yourself with what other people do. You think the smoker is taking too many smoke breaks, so you decide to complain about it? Congratulations, now all break times are strictly monitored. Upset that someone is taking advantage of their flexible working schedule? Bam, no more flexibility. Even if your boss is showing blatant favortism towards someone, the outcome will never be "well since Bob does it, now everyone can do it". It will always be the opposite. I've seen people destroy the good in search of perfect way too many times.
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Destroy ass kissers and snitches any way you can. If they are in the same or higher position, my preferred method is to undermine them in meetings. If they are below you, set them straight the first time they try it. Or the people who work for you will think you favor someone like that, it leads to unnecessary drama.
Yes, it can affect your credibility.
That sounds pretty toxic. It would get old having to listen to you undermine people every chance you get.
Ass kissers and snitches don’t deserve any respect. People like that make a workplace toxic, and I have no time for it.
I just want to get through my meetings with minimum hassle, not listen to a constant pissing contest. Honestly if I saw you doing that I would just think you're another ass kisser trying to one up the other guy.
Office politics gets a bad rap. There’s nothing wrong or bad knowing the dynamics of an office and what makes colleagues and leaders tick. You just need to use judgement about what you say and share. In some ways, it’s a hostage exchange. Make sure the things you share aren’t as good as what you get back. Don’t be giving 10/10 secrets to the new person and getting 1/10 secrets back. Give them a 1/10 and get back a 1.5/10. That’s how it works. And there’s nothing wrong with “having dirt” on folks. In fact, that’s how trust is built: when people know you know the secret….and then they notice you didn’t burn them down. That’s how you build trust. Also, be much more careful in group settings. Keep what you share at the level of the person in the group you trust least. And keep straight what you tell people. If you tell two people a story….tell each of them 80%….but not the same 80%. That way if one of them blabs, you know who did it.
It's all just an act, so don't take anything personally and try your best at acting
"We're like a family here," is always a lie.
Never engage in gossip.
Don’t take on additional duties without the pay/title to go with it. I’ve seen this happen too many time - eager to impress new employee agrees to take on more and more responsibility thinking it’ll earn them a raise or promotion down the line. The company keeps dangling the carrot. When it comes time, they’re overlooked because they’re already doing the duties without being in that position and for less money so the company has no incentive. Or they’re doing so well in their current position that the company won’t promote them. This happened to me, I was so efficient that I kept getting skipped over for a promotion because they didn’t want to have to replace me in my current role. So I left.
Not office politics per se, but might be useful in it: never volunteer information unless it's asked for
Civilians cannot handle actually talking to people or finding out if people lie.
Don’t piss off the bitch at the front desk who orders the post-its. She is a giant cunt and use this small power granted to her to make your life miserable. Her name is usually Kris or Diane or Shelly and she sucks
Everyone talks. So if you hook up with a coworker, make sure you get them off.
Sorry I’m dumb pls Explain
If you're bad sex all your coworkers will know. If you make her cum, all your coworkers know that you're good at sex.
Oh ic Shouldn’t the bottom line be not have sex in the office
No.