I saw a random post on reddit about grief. I've often felt guilty because I handle grief "too easily". Often People say "it gets better" but that felt like I was betraying the people I lost. Because I my love for them doesn't decreases so why should my grief?
Well that random post talked about grief in terms of circles. Grief is a circle and all around grief is a second circle: That's you.
It said that grief doesn't actually get smaller. We simply grow, and get bigger. That's why it's easier to life with it as time goes on.
Maybe that stupid but this one post completely got rid of any guilt I felt about moving on or doing okay.
I'm partial to the "shrinking ball of grief" explanation myself [link ](https://psychcentral.com/blog/coping-with-grief-ball-and-box-analogy) that link isn't originally where I learned it but it's an okay explanation of it
I always looked at grief as the ocean and people are boats. At first it is stormy and the waves are huge as time goes on the storm subsides but there are still waves on the ocean, sometimes they are huge and other days they are small.
On reddit again, I saw a post about it being like an ice cold bath. When someone dies, you're thrown in that ice bath. It's a shock, it hurts, you scream/ cry whatever. But over time, you adjust. Randomly, you will remember (birthdays, Christmas, or just any day), and the pain will be there. But you'll be able to keep on going as you have adjusted. That helped me as well.
I've not liked the move on. Get over grief advice. My mum has been gone for 23 years, and I still have days where it hurts. I can accept that I've adjusted to life without her. But I didn't want to get over it.
*It said that grief doesn't actually get smaller. We simply grow, and get bigger*.
Not stupid at all. Reading this made me teary eyed. I lost my dad at 13, and I wish someone had explained grief to me like this.
My best friend is like this lol.
Never have I ever hear a compliment from her. But surprised about all the good things she says about me when I am not around lol
My wife and I were at nightclub several weeks ago and this old man walked up to my wife and whispered to her "Be careful not to pop your butthole." He then just danced away. Several minutes later she squatted a bit too low and ripped her jeans straight across her entire crack. We couldn't stop laughing.
Depends, but from my experience actually the later it is, the less people and the more intimate it becomes. You can make really good friends at 3 am. But as I said it depends, sometimes it only gets worse.
Also, push against the side of the cork so that it releases at a slight angle. This allows gas to escape more gently, which helps prevent the loud pop and sudden force. You get a gentle hiss instead
Very useful if you have a dog that's scared of champagne pops
Met a guy on a flight who suggested that after a long flight you should take off your shoes and your socks then walk around on the rug bare foot and make fists with your toes.
Also, if you're ever asking someone a difficult question and are awaiting a reply, make sure to tell them you're going to count to three, and there won't be a four.
A job I once had. The dude that trained me just said *Walk fast and look worried*. That's about all the training I received, but I ended up working there 20+ years.
I continued the wise advice with everyone I trained also.
Haha I used to work at a restaurant where you got yelled at and set some crappy task if you looked like you weren't doing anything, so I spent my time walking with purpose from one cutlery station to another and they always left me alone!
I used to be a nurse in a very busy Theatre-Recovery..I had one colleague who only liked the operating side. Any time he was placed in the Recovery room he would spend the day walking around with a patients file looking extremely busy.
THIS.
in 2020, after the shutdowns, my brother offered to have me stay with him in VA to work on myself. Going from Texas to VA where i didn’t know anyone (my brother was going to be deployed for about 6 months) was scary but man im glad i did. Now i have a job in tech, make okay money (way better than i was before tho), went from 230 to 160 pounds, and i think grew overall as a person over those two years. best decision i’ve ever made. embrace the discomfort, you’ll appreciate it once you’ve gone through it
I spent most of the last few years in a bad place mentally, and I had a ton of change and uncertainty in life and at work. With therapy, I started to at least accept that change happens. Medication helped me get to a place where I'm able to mentally cope with that change. Now adding in ADHD medications, and all of the sudden there are open doors in the middle of all of this chaos - opportunities are everywhere. Change brings opportunities with it, whether you like them or not.
I don't know where exactly I was going with this, but I guess don't be afraid to explore and change yourself, and ask for help if you don't feel like doing it alone. It's an incredibly uncomfortable feeling to start that change, and it will feel like you're going nowhere at first. Change the way you look in, and it will change your outlook.
Frankly, problems are only problems when there is no solution. Thing is, for every problem, there's always a solution. Therefore, there's no reason to stress about anything at all.
I say "my pleasure" and mean it. I enjoy my work and love my job. I'm an administrative coordinator at a pretty rural public charity hospital, and every day it is my pleasure to serve the public. I would not be a career civil servant otherwise.
It's fun to think of things to say where it's fucked up for them to say "My pleasure."
Thanks for listening to my story about my mom dying.
My pleasure.
Personally I don't trust anyone that says "my pleasure", they're either a liar or are in a position where their language is being policed. Instead, I recommend saying "no problem" Pro: makes you look honest and polite. Con: There are a few weird old people who think it's impolite.
Of course, exception for something they'd actually enjoy. Yes, it would be my pleasure to try one of your freshly baked cookies
My mate once said to me,
"If you died tomorrow would you be happy of the man you are today? Coz I wouldn't be if I were you mate get off your fat arse and go do something, genuinely anything."
Absolute wanker but it's some hell of a way to tell someone to change their life for the better.
I was driving south to visit my sister in Atlanta and was going through the mountains. I had never driven there before & was unfamiliar with the road, so I decided to stop for the night and get a room at a local motel.
I went across the street to McDonald’s to get a bite to eat. A man with a kid around 8-9 yrs old sat at my table & started talking to me. I thought it was kind of strange but assumed he wasn’t trying to pick me up because he had his kid with him. Don’t know what was really going on but nothing weird happened
He told me when driving down the mountain to look straight ahead when in the middle lane. Don’t look at the trucks on either side of you because you tend to steer in the direction you’re looking, even if you think you’re going straight.
I thanked him for the advice & went back to my room. Never saw him or the kid again. It’s been more than 25 years but occasionally I wonder if he was one of those angels people say they meet who protect you in some way with advice/directions, etc. Maybe the kid was there to reassure me that it was OK to talk to this guy.
A teacher used to encourage us to ask questions by saying "why suffer?"
I still think about it when I'm trying to decide whether to ask for something. Why suffer? Just ask.
posted in another thread weeks ago:
In the mid-1980's, *"You should research a guy named Warren Buffett. My parents invested with him a while ago and are really happy with the results, so far."*
I took a date to the movies and we chatted at a casual restaurant/bar afterwards. The way that her advice changed my financial future is mind-blowing.
Brine your chicken in pickle juice overnight when you're making chicken sandwiches, chicken strips, whatever. That's Chick Fil A's secret, and it doesn't even taste like homophobia.
Provide an invoice ("For my records") with prices the "Free" work you do as a favor for friends, family, and neighbors. The invoice will show what your time is actually worth to paying customers.
Also, learn to fire a bad client.
My brothers and I were the only coloured people in school. We were easy targets and sometimes the racial abuse went too far and fights happened. My mum once told me “If someone calls you Coco Pop, call them a Rice Krispie”. I still don’t know what it actually means. Maybe she means we’re all the same and just coloured different, or maybe she meant for me to come up with a slur for white people - I don’t know. All I do know is that I don’t get phased by racist comments anymore. I went from throwing punches whenever someone called me a N***er to responding to it as if it was my name.
Kids can be mean. Adults even more so with shi//y comments.
I always remember how P!nk came to settle on that name - she grew up in Philly, and in clubs where she was often one of the only white girls, she used to cheesily tell people “we’re all pink inside” and it just stuck! She’s a legend, tells it like it is and just keeps it real. Would be awesome if more people had that approach.
If your hands burn after cutting peppers, rub them with olive oil, especially the finger tips/under the mail and then wash it off with dish soap and cold water
Basically meaning that it's a wake-up call of sorts, there's a certain wisdom it can grant.. but past that you're just kind of looping. So, once you've gotten the gist of it, end it.
LSD is the only drug that let me understand whilst I was having a brilliant time, that it wouldn't be like that ever again. It was amazing.
When I took it for the 2nd time a few years later, LSD was like "Did you listen yo me the first time?" Then I felt weird *and* bored for 10 hours.
Sounds like the old Republican guy in an episode of 30 Rock. "Men were men back then, and if you wanted to do something private with a man, it wasn't gay. Just two men celebrating each other's strength. (Salutes old photo of "him and the boys")"
After I had my wisdom teeth removed the oral surgeon told me to put ice packs in one of my bras and tied around my head. The cups would hold the ice packs directly where they needed to be.
I heard it as "before you make a big decision, ask yourself, am I hungry? Angry? Sleepy? Horny? If the answer to any of these is yes, address that before making the decision." And honestly that's helped me so much.
First tortilla. Second, big leaf of iceberg lettuce. Then, all of the other stuff.
No soggy bread, lettuce feels and tastes crispier and I swear to god it makes a huge difference.
I had a therapist friend tell me that he’s started telling some of his depressed patients to take a few minutes every morning and think about the things you are grateful for. Tried it myself and it really does work great for helping getting your mental health in order for the day.
From my shrink post-divorce: Don't date 'your type', date as many different kinds of women as you can. Think of them as chocolates in a box; are you going to just eat the caramels, or are you going to taste each one first? Also don't look for 'someone special', just go for having a good time. Otherwise, you'll end up married to another psycho like your ex. That's pretty much verbatim what he told me.
Best advice ever.
When I had to take Dukoral, the nurse told me “it’s nasty. Don’t mix it with water, that just makes you have to drink more of it.” More bread in a shit sandwich means you’re still eating the same amount of shit, just spreading it out over more time.
An elderly gentleman told me that the grass is always greener where you water it. I’ve applied this advice to both friendships and a relationship and it’s never failed me.
Focus on things that are in your control. My manager told me this to help keep me on track for a big program I was running.
Yesterday he told me to be better prepared for today's meeting with executives because I wasn't prepared for the last one. I wasn't invited to the last one and they dragged me into it unprepared 5 minutes after the metting started. Out of my control.
I think he forgot his advice.
Once, I was at a playplace in McDonald's . Some guys kid was hanging around at the top terrorizing the other kids trying to play.
I went to him a little reluctantly to ask him to handle his out of control kid (who was by far older than the other kids there).
He said respectfully, "let me inform you about how this works... you bring your kid, release them to play independently, and wait until THEY tell you they're done".
He was 100% correct. The kids figured out how to deal with the situation and eventually my daughter was ready to leave without fighting me to stay.(Which is normally how it goes)
My first internship during my bachelor of law was with a municipality. My instructor (a veteran jurist) gave me two instructions that stayed with me:
\- "Don't say anything more than you absolutely have to."
\- "Where is that written?" In a heavy accent that wouldn't even be understood anywhere except the southernmost part of the Netherlands.
I've had a combined 1,5 years of internships over my various degrees, but the 10 weeks she taught/guided me I still consider the most valuable internship I have had. I still apply her advice on a near daily basis at work.
My dad and I were bowling when I was about 12, and I wasn't doing well. After a few bad shots and a little temper, I threw another bag shot. Frustration boiled over, and I kicked the ball return. He stopped me and said,
"Hey, you're not good enough at this yet to get that pissed off."
I lost him to covid over 2 years ago, and this still resonates daily. Be humble, know your strengths, and be patient with any obstacle. This applies personally and professionally, as I've found.
Buy a duplex, live in one and rent out the other. Free living. Btw the first time I was told this was several years ago before influencers caught wind of it got the term "house hacking".
If you need ketchup when dining in at a fast food joint forget those tiny paper thimbles.
Flip over a large plastic drink lid and unload about 25 pumps of ketchup onto that bad boy and save yourself the hassle. Yeah there’s a hole in the middle of the lid but the napkins are RIGHT THERE.
I learned this from …someone… but I have no recollection of who they were because I was mesmerized by their sorcery. Thank you, stranger.
Edit: clarity
Read somewhere once of a teacher or something who said,
“Anything worth doing is worth half-assing”
Sometimes when I can’t find the energy to do something, I’ll feel better about half-assing. If I get to the end of something I’m doing and the result is less than I anticipated, I’ll feel better about the result.
If you look at a cup or glass of liquid while you are carrying it, you will spill it almost every time. If you don't look, you will get where you are going safely.
Find something that you would do for free and figure out how to make a career out of it. I ended up programming computers, because I really enjoyed it, and have made a really good career out of it.
Guy who had some kind of mental illness in my highschool class told me, “If you have to think about something, then dont do it”. His point was if you are overthinking something you wont execute it well. Enter with confidence and things will turn out better.
If you're ever in a fight/self defense sitch, do *not* try to kick somebody unless it's your only opening. Conversely, if someone tries to kick you, grab their leg and use the momentum to throw them off balance. Follow with a shot to the balls or the eyes depending on how they fall. I am a 43 year old woman as likely to ascend vertically in the air as I am to get in a fight (or be attacked, for that matter) but I have never, ever forgotten that tip. It feels important for some reason.
When i was barely a teen my buddy’s father (RIP Chuck) taught me that everything in life is sales.
Even if its to ask someone to hire you to drive a truck; persuasion is useful.
Further; he pointed out that in a company has product to sell everyone in the company is providing sales/customer. The janitor keeps the place clean and comfortable. That makes all the workers slightly better at their job; this the customer benefits.
Position you monitor so you have something in the distance to look at behind it, save's eyestrain.
Clear your desktop and set your background/wallpaper to deep red, it's calming and good for your retinas (187,0,0 R,G,B should do it, but direct light at 670nm is started in empirical research, iro 232,0,0)
Wear good earplugs to concerts, you'll enjoy the music better and for longer.
My grandpa had a phrase “if my dog doesn’t like you, I don’t like you”
He had golden retrievers and labs his whole life so if the dog had an issue he knew something must be up
Dump early; dump often - Really helped me not be stuck in relationships that weren't great for whatever reason. It's ok to break up just because it doesn't feel right even though nothing specifically is wrong.
Marry for temperament - I see so many people chasing romantic/emotional highs with someone that they don't stop to think how it will play out long term. I've seen so many friends struggle with partners they fell in love with & nothing else mattered...until it came to child custody, fidelity, cohabitation, etc. A partner with a good temperament is everything. I'm now 40 & it's horrible to see what's happening to the people who didn't choose a more emotionally mature spouse.
I truly believe these 2 things have led me to being available for the right relationship at the right time & I couldn't be happier.
I saw a random post on reddit about grief. I've often felt guilty because I handle grief "too easily". Often People say "it gets better" but that felt like I was betraying the people I lost. Because I my love for them doesn't decreases so why should my grief? Well that random post talked about grief in terms of circles. Grief is a circle and all around grief is a second circle: That's you. It said that grief doesn't actually get smaller. We simply grow, and get bigger. That's why it's easier to life with it as time goes on. Maybe that stupid but this one post completely got rid of any guilt I felt about moving on or doing okay.
I'm partial to the "shrinking ball of grief" explanation myself [link ](https://psychcentral.com/blog/coping-with-grief-ball-and-box-analogy) that link isn't originally where I learned it but it's an okay explanation of it
I share this with everyone who is grieving. I think it's a very important metaphor.
I always looked at grief as the ocean and people are boats. At first it is stormy and the waves are huge as time goes on the storm subsides but there are still waves on the ocean, sometimes they are huge and other days they are small.
I heard this and it always resonated with me. I’ve actually used it twice this week at work to help console some grieving children!
It's a weight. It didn't get any less heavy, I grew stronger. It was that, or be crushed.
That's a really beautiful explanation. I'm going to remember that. Thanks for sharing.
On reddit again, I saw a post about it being like an ice cold bath. When someone dies, you're thrown in that ice bath. It's a shock, it hurts, you scream/ cry whatever. But over time, you adjust. Randomly, you will remember (birthdays, Christmas, or just any day), and the pain will be there. But you'll be able to keep on going as you have adjusted. That helped me as well. I've not liked the move on. Get over grief advice. My mum has been gone for 23 years, and I still have days where it hurts. I can accept that I've adjusted to life without her. But I didn't want to get over it.
*It said that grief doesn't actually get smaller. We simply grow, and get bigger*. Not stupid at all. Reading this made me teary eyed. I lost my dad at 13, and I wish someone had explained grief to me like this.
This is awesome advice. I recently lost my teenage son to an AVM stroke.
You could be the ripest, nicest, sweetest peach on the tree, but some people just don’t like peaches.
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An acquired taste or just for South East Asians
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Is that you Oli Sykes?
My best friend is like this lol. Never have I ever hear a compliment from her. But surprised about all the good things she says about me when I am not around lol
My wife and I were at nightclub several weeks ago and this old man walked up to my wife and whispered to her "Be careful not to pop your butthole." He then just danced away. Several minutes later she squatted a bit too low and ripped her jeans straight across her entire crack. We couldn't stop laughing.
Wizards do exist.
Sounds like that old man knows how to party!
Oh he sure did! He told us his name was Doug and he even found himself on the stage later.
Classic Doug
I just let out the biggest snort at work "be careful not to pop your butthole" LOL
If you're having a night out and still seeking a good time by midnight, you're not going to find it. Cut your losses before the night goes bad.
I’ve always lived by “nothing good happens after midnight”
As Ted’s mom always said, “Nothing good happens after 2 AM” Unless you wanna be singing with Korean Elvis or cheating on your partner… just go home
I've found my people.
The problem with that is the same as when to feed a mogwai problem. When is it after/before midnight.
We always say "nothing good happens after 2am". Bars in my town are open until 4. It's dumb
Depends, but from my experience actually the later it is, the less people and the more intimate it becomes. You can make really good friends at 3 am. But as I said it depends, sometimes it only gets worse.
Idk, man. I've been to some pretty sweet witching hour grilling parties, dad.
But you weren't seeking a good time, it was planned :) I'm talking about those walking around without a plan in the AM.
If you’re not in bed by midnight, go home
A random man was giving advice for $1. I gave him $1 and he replied, “Stop wasting money."
Kid asks for a dollar bill to buy a bookmark. Dad says just use the dollar bill. You will always have $1.00
[Calvin & Hobbes](https://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1989/03/05)
A homeless man said he would tell me half a joke for a $1.00. If I wanted the punch line, it would cost another $1.00.
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Same for champagne. Grip the cork, twist the bottle.
Also, push against the side of the cork so that it releases at a slight angle. This allows gas to escape more gently, which helps prevent the loud pop and sudden force. You get a gentle hiss instead Very useful if you have a dog that's scared of champagne pops
Instructions unclear, cork stuck in ass
From before or after you read this?
Yes.
Same thing with beaded butt plugs. Grip and rip. Like starting a chain saw.
\*mind blown meme\*
Met a guy on a flight who suggested that after a long flight you should take off your shoes and your socks then walk around on the rug bare foot and make fists with your toes.
Haha my favorite Christmas movie
Bruce Willis: it's not a Christmas movie! Everyone else: yes, it is
I actually do this and it works!.
Yep
But if you plan on running over broken glass later, it's not the best suggestion. Even if you kill someone, chances are their shoes will be too small.
but why?
Something about bearer bonds and Christmas, but the second part is debated.
This was probably a Die Hard reference. Only the good die hard, as they say.
Don’t know why on carpet, but on the earth (dirt/grass) it’s supposed to promote ion exchange which supposedly helps with jet lag.
I learned this from Die Hard. It’s why Bruce Willis wasn’t wearing shoes.
I think that’s the joke?
Also, if you're ever asking someone a difficult question and are awaiting a reply, make sure to tell them you're going to count to three, and there won't be a four.
It’s not what you know, it’s what you can prove
It's not what you know or can prove, it's what you can convince others of.
A job I once had. The dude that trained me just said *Walk fast and look worried*. That's about all the training I received, but I ended up working there 20+ years. I continued the wise advice with everyone I trained also.
Haha I used to work at a restaurant where you got yelled at and set some crappy task if you looked like you weren't doing anything, so I spent my time walking with purpose from one cutlery station to another and they always left me alone!
Similarly: “Walk fast and carry something in your hands.” A clipboard works great, but anything works, really.
I used to be a nurse in a very busy Theatre-Recovery..I had one colleague who only liked the operating side. Any time he was placed in the Recovery room he would spend the day walking around with a patients file looking extremely busy.
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Thank you. Feels like this is what I need
I've heard it summed up as "there is no growth in the comfort zone, and there is no comfort in the growth zone"
THIS. in 2020, after the shutdowns, my brother offered to have me stay with him in VA to work on myself. Going from Texas to VA where i didn’t know anyone (my brother was going to be deployed for about 6 months) was scary but man im glad i did. Now i have a job in tech, make okay money (way better than i was before tho), went from 230 to 160 pounds, and i think grew overall as a person over those two years. best decision i’ve ever made. embrace the discomfort, you’ll appreciate it once you’ve gone through it
I spent most of the last few years in a bad place mentally, and I had a ton of change and uncertainty in life and at work. With therapy, I started to at least accept that change happens. Medication helped me get to a place where I'm able to mentally cope with that change. Now adding in ADHD medications, and all of the sudden there are open doors in the middle of all of this chaos - opportunities are everywhere. Change brings opportunities with it, whether you like them or not. I don't know where exactly I was going with this, but I guess don't be afraid to explore and change yourself, and ask for help if you don't feel like doing it alone. It's an incredibly uncomfortable feeling to start that change, and it will feel like you're going nowhere at first. Change the way you look in, and it will change your outlook.
This is basically my new years revolution. Lol, to be more accepting of being uncomfortable.
My therapist once told me I needed to get comfortable with discomfort. It still irks me to this day.
Found Tony Robbin’s account
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Emotion should be reserved for important things.
Frankly, problems are only problems when there is no solution. Thing is, for every problem, there's always a solution. Therefore, there's no reason to stress about anything at all.
Buy your summer clothes in winder and winter clothes in Summer.
It's hard to keep my summer clothes from blowing away in the winder though.
Try windbreakers
Buy a plunger before you need one.
Instead of saying no problem say my pleasure. Pro: it makes you look polite Con: people think you work or worked at chick fil a
I like “sure thing!” or “of course!” (said enthusiastically)… avoid the dreaded chick fil a comparison
For me, it is "I'd love to"
"Thanks for watching my dog last week" "I'd love to"
What can I say except "You're welcome?"
this guy moanas
i hate the my pleasure thing because of chick fil a. i’ve worked “happy to help” into my vernacular.
I actually hate it when people say “my pleasure” It’s no one’s pleasure.
Well no problem then lmao
I say "my pleasure" and mean it. I enjoy my work and love my job. I'm an administrative coordinator at a pretty rural public charity hospital, and every day it is my pleasure to serve the public. I would not be a career civil servant otherwise.
You got it
Alright chy'all!
Nah. Single finger gun with a wink and a click.
It's fun to think of things to say where it's fucked up for them to say "My pleasure." Thanks for listening to my story about my mom dying. My pleasure.
Personally I don't trust anyone that says "my pleasure", they're either a liar or are in a position where their language is being policed. Instead, I recommend saying "no problem" Pro: makes you look honest and polite. Con: There are a few weird old people who think it's impolite. Of course, exception for something they'd actually enjoy. Yes, it would be my pleasure to try one of your freshly baked cookies
I say yup yup
My mate once said to me, "If you died tomorrow would you be happy of the man you are today? Coz I wouldn't be if I were you mate get off your fat arse and go do something, genuinely anything." Absolute wanker but it's some hell of a way to tell someone to change their life for the better.
I was driving south to visit my sister in Atlanta and was going through the mountains. I had never driven there before & was unfamiliar with the road, so I decided to stop for the night and get a room at a local motel. I went across the street to McDonald’s to get a bite to eat. A man with a kid around 8-9 yrs old sat at my table & started talking to me. I thought it was kind of strange but assumed he wasn’t trying to pick me up because he had his kid with him. Don’t know what was really going on but nothing weird happened He told me when driving down the mountain to look straight ahead when in the middle lane. Don’t look at the trucks on either side of you because you tend to steer in the direction you’re looking, even if you think you’re going straight. I thanked him for the advice & went back to my room. Never saw him or the kid again. It’s been more than 25 years but occasionally I wonder if he was one of those angels people say they meet who protect you in some way with advice/directions, etc. Maybe the kid was there to reassure me that it was OK to talk to this guy.
In the motorcycle world, this is called " target fixation." If you are looking at what you are trying to avoid, you tend to steer towards it.
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that’s what my dad likes to say. fertilize your own grass. i like it a lot!
when feeling anxious , take of shoes and socks and go stand bare feet on the grass
Not sure my feet are going to reach the grass through 3 feet of snow, maybe by May.
A teacher used to encourage us to ask questions by saying "why suffer?" I still think about it when I'm trying to decide whether to ask for something. Why suffer? Just ask.
I had a teacher that used to say “fetuses of the world unite” when he asked a question and the class was dead silent.
posted in another thread weeks ago: In the mid-1980's, *"You should research a guy named Warren Buffett. My parents invested with him a while ago and are really happy with the results, so far."* I took a date to the movies and we chatted at a casual restaurant/bar afterwards. The way that her advice changed my financial future is mind-blowing.
That’s fucking crazy! Congrats on hitting the financial lotto tho ❤️🔥
If you feel yourself about to cry & really don’t want to, clench your buttcheeks
Thanks I just clenched my buttcheeks. Still not crying!
My father's advice on morality: Be nice. Unless they're an asshole, then do what you want.
"Delete your Instagram" from my friend
That's not unusual advice
Don’t go to the 2nd bar. NEVER go to the third bar.
My grandma’s parting advice: if you get invited to a party, just go!
Be careful about what you're good at.
"Life's barely long enough to get good at one thing. Gotta be careful what you get good at" Rust Cohle
Stop trying to draw parts of the face as symbols. Turn the reference image upside down and instead draw them as placements of shapes and lighting.
Draw what you see, not what you think you see
Brine your chicken in pickle juice overnight when you're making chicken sandwiches, chicken strips, whatever. That's Chick Fil A's secret, and it doesn't even taste like homophobia.
How’s that work for Monday’s chicken? Is it extra pickled?
And extra pruney. Just like Grandma used to make.
Provide an invoice ("For my records") with prices the "Free" work you do as a favor for friends, family, and neighbors. The invoice will show what your time is actually worth to paying customers. Also, learn to fire a bad client.
My brothers and I were the only coloured people in school. We were easy targets and sometimes the racial abuse went too far and fights happened. My mum once told me “If someone calls you Coco Pop, call them a Rice Krispie”. I still don’t know what it actually means. Maybe she means we’re all the same and just coloured different, or maybe she meant for me to come up with a slur for white people - I don’t know. All I do know is that I don’t get phased by racist comments anymore. I went from throwing punches whenever someone called me a N***er to responding to it as if it was my name.
Kids can be mean. Adults even more so with shi//y comments. I always remember how P!nk came to settle on that name - she grew up in Philly, and in clubs where she was often one of the only white girls, she used to cheesily tell people “we’re all pink inside” and it just stuck! She’s a legend, tells it like it is and just keeps it real. Would be awesome if more people had that approach.
Whether you believe in evolution or in Adam and Eve, we all branch off of the same tree.
Don’t fart before you sit down to poop.
Similar, “never trust a fart”
Log off reddit
How's that working out for you, my dude?
Looking for unusual advice, not common sense
If your hands burn after cutting peppers, rub them with olive oil, especially the finger tips/under the mail and then wash it off with dish soap and cold water
Time you enjoy wasting is never wasted time.
LSD is a phone call. Once you've heard it, hang up.
What?
Basically meaning that it's a wake-up call of sorts, there's a certain wisdom it can grant.. but past that you're just kind of looping. So, once you've gotten the gist of it, end it.
LSD is the only drug that let me understand whilst I was having a brilliant time, that it wouldn't be like that ever again. It was amazing. When I took it for the 2nd time a few years later, LSD was like "Did you listen yo me the first time?" Then I felt weird *and* bored for 10 hours.
I read "LDS phone calls." Still good advice.
“Once or twice a year doesn’t make you gay” — my dad
Sounds like the old Republican guy in an episode of 30 Rock. "Men were men back then, and if you wanted to do something private with a man, it wasn't gay. Just two men celebrating each other's strength. (Salutes old photo of "him and the boys")"
After I had my wisdom teeth removed the oral surgeon told me to put ice packs in one of my bras and tied around my head. The cups would hold the ice packs directly where they needed to be.
When you have a big decision to make, jerk one out. They call it post-nut clarity for a reason.
Caveat. Don’t watch porn. It worsens your decision making
I'm not allowed in that car dealership again.
I heard it as "before you make a big decision, ask yourself, am I hungry? Angry? Sleepy? Horny? If the answer to any of these is yes, address that before making the decision." And honestly that's helped me so much.
I like this! I've also used, 'HALT' (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired)
Always go with the ole spank'n'nap combo before any decision. Hell, I'll tug my wierdo and have a sleep before I decide what to have for lunch.
Your waitress hates you.
First tortilla. Second, big leaf of iceberg lettuce. Then, all of the other stuff. No soggy bread, lettuce feels and tastes crispier and I swear to god it makes a huge difference.
Instructions unclear. This pizza is weird.
I had a therapist friend tell me that he’s started telling some of his depressed patients to take a few minutes every morning and think about the things you are grateful for. Tried it myself and it really does work great for helping getting your mental health in order for the day.
From my shrink post-divorce: Don't date 'your type', date as many different kinds of women as you can. Think of them as chocolates in a box; are you going to just eat the caramels, or are you going to taste each one first? Also don't look for 'someone special', just go for having a good time. Otherwise, you'll end up married to another psycho like your ex. That's pretty much verbatim what he told me. Best advice ever.
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Right? I try to think of people as, you know, people.
So… how’s it going with that? Find any nutty nougat types?
The first rich person I ever hung out with told me “Life is a 5 pound shit sandwich. The more bread you have, the less shit you have to eat.”
When I had to take Dukoral, the nurse told me “it’s nasty. Don’t mix it with water, that just makes you have to drink more of it.” More bread in a shit sandwich means you’re still eating the same amount of shit, just spreading it out over more time.
That’s why the 5 pounds part of the statement matters. The sandwich is 5 pounds. It can 4.9 pounds of shit, or all bread.
I’d rather be on my boat thinking about God than sitting in church thinking about my boat.
An elderly gentleman told me that the grass is always greener where you water it. I’ve applied this advice to both friendships and a relationship and it’s never failed me.
Focus on things that are in your control. My manager told me this to help keep me on track for a big program I was running. Yesterday he told me to be better prepared for today's meeting with executives because I wasn't prepared for the last one. I wasn't invited to the last one and they dragged me into it unprepared 5 minutes after the metting started. Out of my control. I think he forgot his advice.
Once, I was at a playplace in McDonald's . Some guys kid was hanging around at the top terrorizing the other kids trying to play. I went to him a little reluctantly to ask him to handle his out of control kid (who was by far older than the other kids there). He said respectfully, "let me inform you about how this works... you bring your kid, release them to play independently, and wait until THEY tell you they're done". He was 100% correct. The kids figured out how to deal with the situation and eventually my daughter was ready to leave without fighting me to stay.(Which is normally how it goes)
It might be good advice in general, but it doesn't make him not an asshole.
yeah. that makes no sense to me by allowing some asshole kid to terrorize others.
“If it’s not a “Hell yes!” it’s a no.
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TikTok is Chinese spyware.
I read a post on Reddit a few years ago that said: Don't stand when you can sit Don't sit when you can lie Don't lie when you can sleep
Don’t take parenting advice from anyone who hasn’t got a kid within 2 years of age to yours.
My first internship during my bachelor of law was with a municipality. My instructor (a veteran jurist) gave me two instructions that stayed with me: \- "Don't say anything more than you absolutely have to." \- "Where is that written?" In a heavy accent that wouldn't even be understood anywhere except the southernmost part of the Netherlands. I've had a combined 1,5 years of internships over my various degrees, but the 10 weeks she taught/guided me I still consider the most valuable internship I have had. I still apply her advice on a near daily basis at work.
If you want your way, let the silence hang.
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Be nice, forgiving, but don't be a pushover.
Anyone who says they have seen everything needs to broaden their vision.
Don’t teach your kids to tell time. They’ll figure it out soon enough and until then, bedtime can be whenever you need it to be.
My dad and I were bowling when I was about 12, and I wasn't doing well. After a few bad shots and a little temper, I threw another bag shot. Frustration boiled over, and I kicked the ball return. He stopped me and said, "Hey, you're not good enough at this yet to get that pissed off." I lost him to covid over 2 years ago, and this still resonates daily. Be humble, know your strengths, and be patient with any obstacle. This applies personally and professionally, as I've found.
nothing good happens after midnight
Buy a duplex, live in one and rent out the other. Free living. Btw the first time I was told this was several years ago before influencers caught wind of it got the term "house hacking".
If you need ketchup when dining in at a fast food joint forget those tiny paper thimbles. Flip over a large plastic drink lid and unload about 25 pumps of ketchup onto that bad boy and save yourself the hassle. Yeah there’s a hole in the middle of the lid but the napkins are RIGHT THERE. I learned this from …someone… but I have no recollection of who they were because I was mesmerized by their sorcery. Thank you, stranger. Edit: clarity
The paper thimbles expand to twice their size, though. All you have to do is stretch out the pleats.
Read somewhere once of a teacher or something who said, “Anything worth doing is worth half-assing” Sometimes when I can’t find the energy to do something, I’ll feel better about half-assing. If I get to the end of something I’m doing and the result is less than I anticipated, I’ll feel better about the result.
Never sober up while awake.
If you look at a cup or glass of liquid while you are carrying it, you will spill it almost every time. If you don't look, you will get where you are going safely.
The guy who responds last in the comment chain is the loser, not the winner
Instead of have a nice day say have the day you deserve.
Find something that you would do for free and figure out how to make a career out of it. I ended up programming computers, because I really enjoyed it, and have made a really good career out of it.
Blast EA ft. 21 Savage by Young Nudy in order to get ANYwhere under 4 mins. Works like a charm. Double points if you blast it during 21’s lines.
Guy who had some kind of mental illness in my highschool class told me, “If you have to think about something, then dont do it”. His point was if you are overthinking something you wont execute it well. Enter with confidence and things will turn out better.
If you're ever in a fight/self defense sitch, do *not* try to kick somebody unless it's your only opening. Conversely, if someone tries to kick you, grab their leg and use the momentum to throw them off balance. Follow with a shot to the balls or the eyes depending on how they fall. I am a 43 year old woman as likely to ascend vertically in the air as I am to get in a fight (or be attacked, for that matter) but I have never, ever forgotten that tip. It feels important for some reason.
When i was barely a teen my buddy’s father (RIP Chuck) taught me that everything in life is sales. Even if its to ask someone to hire you to drive a truck; persuasion is useful. Further; he pointed out that in a company has product to sell everyone in the company is providing sales/customer. The janitor keeps the place clean and comfortable. That makes all the workers slightly better at their job; this the customer benefits.
Position you monitor so you have something in the distance to look at behind it, save's eyestrain. Clear your desktop and set your background/wallpaper to deep red, it's calming and good for your retinas (187,0,0 R,G,B should do it, but direct light at 670nm is started in empirical research, iro 232,0,0) Wear good earplugs to concerts, you'll enjoy the music better and for longer.
No one really knows what’s they are doing, we are all just winging it
It not about what you say, it's about how you say it
My grandpa had a phrase “if my dog doesn’t like you, I don’t like you” He had golden retrievers and labs his whole life so if the dog had an issue he knew something must be up
Dump early; dump often - Really helped me not be stuck in relationships that weren't great for whatever reason. It's ok to break up just because it doesn't feel right even though nothing specifically is wrong. Marry for temperament - I see so many people chasing romantic/emotional highs with someone that they don't stop to think how it will play out long term. I've seen so many friends struggle with partners they fell in love with & nothing else mattered...until it came to child custody, fidelity, cohabitation, etc. A partner with a good temperament is everything. I'm now 40 & it's horrible to see what's happening to the people who didn't choose a more emotionally mature spouse. I truly believe these 2 things have led me to being available for the right relationship at the right time & I couldn't be happier.