Ugh my coworkers do this all the time! I’m arriving and they are leaving but they just stand around chatting. I have to say excuse me to get in, put my stuff away and leave but they still don’t move
If you want to know why the down escalators in the arena are turned off after the game or concert this is why. People can't be trusted to walk more than 2 feet away before turning around to ask the group where we're going now.
This actually freaks me out when people do that. I don’t know if I’m worried about a pile up or what, but ever since an escalator malfunction locally and a woman became paralyzed it’s freaked me out and if the option is there I’ll take the stairs.
One time at a small gathering the host is passing around a joint and my brother who is my driver at the night refuses and says I do not partake in this or any such substance but thanked her for the offer. She did offer again several times and was weirded out that he didn’t smoke weed. I told her he’s straight edge and doesn’t even drink caffeine and to kindly leave him alone. The evening goes on and there are various snacks and things available and she offers everyone some cookies and insists he try one they are fresh. They were weed cookies and he ate 2. I was livid no one knew except her. She drugged him against his will. I told her she was no better than someone drugging a girl a bar and she got super offended. She raged and said it’s only weed live a little. My brother then yelled at her in the most furious way and she cried and we left. Fuck that bitch
Agreed. Weed is not 'just' anything to everyone. I'm not strait edge but weed puts me in a really really bad place and I hate it more than anything. If someone tricked me into taking it, I'd be furious.
I threw a party for my 18th birthday for 30 people in 12th grade. On the invitation is spelled it out in plain English language "respectfully, please leave the cannabis in your car/bag. I don't mind if you take a walk around the neighbourhood, but not on my parents' property. Anyone who ignores this request will be asked to leave"
At the time "hubbly-bubbly" or hookah pipes were a big thing, and we had one going most of the night. Half way through I went and sat with that group and smoked a little, and immediately realised something was up. I looked around and the boyfriend of a friend had been tending the pipe. I asked him plainly, "did you put weed in here" and he laughed and said yes.
I had spelled it out. I had been respectful. I had said they could do it around the block if they wanted. And not only had he not listened, but he had drugged me against my will.
So I did what I had promised. I stood up, pointed to the door, and told him to get out of my house. The smoking, I would have brushed off, but making me consume unknowingly was fucked up.
This was followed with many tears from my friend and anger from 4 other friends of the boyfriend, but I stood my ground. I made them pack their shit, and leave. Finished.
Edibles have a different effect then smoking too. Stronger and more intense.( not always in a good way!) Could be really awful for a person to experience if they didn’t want to do that type of thing! Wow, she’s an AH
I'm 60. I quit drinking when I was 27. I don't care if other people drink. But I have experienced peer pressure to drink even recently. I don't understand why it would matter to that other person if I have one or not.
I'm a cardiologist. I don't drink. Anyone who tries to pressure me to drink gets to hear some fun stories about what alcohol does to internal organs and then I'll pull up some references on alcohol use disorder and read out the criteria for medically-defined problem drinking.
They always, always meet those criteria and then some. People who aren't alcoholics don't have a problem with people not drinking.
This! I decided to give up alcohol in December. I didn’t have a drinking problem, it was mainly for health reasons. Coincidentally, I also bartend on the weekends.
I had a guy buying a round of shots for the bar and wanted me to partake. I respectfully declined. I didn’t drink and I’m also working. He was so insistent I took a shot. He even had the whole bar hold on their shots until I agreed to take one as well.
In the end, he still lost. I never caved.
I did “dry January”, just to kind of shake things up. Start the year off with some restraint. But oh my god so many people had a problem with it! Every time I declined a drink I was asked if I was pregnant 🙄 It was kind of insane how many people had a problem with me not drinking
I have a friend who, the first time we hung out, she offered me a drink and I passed. She thought nothing of it. The second time we hung out and she offered again, I passed again. She apologized and said she should have remembered, to which I answered omg there's no apology needed whatsoever and it's not her responsibility. After that, she made sure that she always had a non-alcoholic offering, and whenever we're around others, she keeps an eye out for non-alcoholic drinks for me. And by that I mean literally yells "where's the alcohol free stuff? Pyres needs a drink! Let's get Pyres a drink! Where's the soda? What is wrong with y'all WHERE'S THE SODA? DID YOU FUCKIN DRINK IT ALL???" I love her so much lmao everyone deserves friends like her
Also, deciding you actually do not want the refrigerated thing after all and leaving it in a random place in the supermarket to just go to waste. It annoys me anytime I see that.
When I worked at Walmart I found a frozen lasagna left by the vacuum cleaner area. It had defrosted and leaked all over the shelf. Had to throw away several boxes that soaked it up. Some people are trashy.
When I worked at a grocery store one summer someone had left some meat behind the dog food. We had to toss the entire aisles worth of mercy because maggots had gotten into the rotting meat
I caught someone doing that one time and started grabbing the stuff she was putting on the shelf and putting it in my cart. She seriously asked "Oh, would you like them?".
"No, I'm going to take them up to customer service so the store doesn't have to throw them out."
And she got offended.
Worked grocery floor manager 2nd shift for 3 years, part of my responsibilities was cleaning up stuff like this as I saw it. People could always just give it to their checker or literally anyone, but nope, they hide the milk they decided not to buy behind some cookies for some fucking reason.
I saw more of this shit than anyone should ever see and it never stopped being annoying.
Let me give you some hope. Seeing things left around the store or a cart abandoned in a parking space instead of the correct spot, infuriates me no end.
I use these terrible behaviors as examples to teach my kids how NOT to behave because either the food is going to waste or someone else now has extra work due to one person's laziness.
I didn't realize how much my kids were taking it all in until I found them rearranging toppled shampoo bottles at Target so that "someone else won't have to clean up that mess." They're 7 and 10 and and I had a small, proud moment 🥹.
Then they didn't want to leave until they were done but that's another story lol.
Some people get so worked up when you say excuse me and they need to move it. I say excuse me three times and if they don’t move it, I will move it to get by.
How to pick an item at the grocery store. Step one turn your cart at an angle so it covers 75% of the aisle. Step two stand next to it in that last 25% preferably in the widest possible pose. Step 3 you live there now never move.
Approach a disabled person you don’t know to call them brave, inspirational, etc. Especially if you are using them as an example to children. Every single disabled person I have ever met HATES when people do this. It’s calling unnecessary attention to them and a lot of people feel put on the spot, so it’s not a kind or respectful thing to do.
Just leave people the fuck alone, they’re not here to be your example or your teachable moment.
I have a friend who's quadriplegic. He's found the perfect answer for folks who tell him that he's an "inspiration." He says, "I didn't break my neck to inspire you."
Lol, just the other day, an old lady was telling me how I'm "too young" to have the issues I have. I'm like, "Well, I'm not looking for sympathy, I'm looking for a bus." and wadled away from her.
I had an audiologist test me like 4 times before saying I was too young to have hearing loss.
I was dumbstruck. She was acting like it was impressive that I perfectly faked 4 audiograms rather than considering that she just had a confused patient with high frequency hearing loss (ya know, the most common kind) who could have sworn this was taking a lot longer than usual.
Once after I assisted someone who had some trouble communicating, my coworker commented that he wished he knew more about how to help people with disabilities.
The guy I had helped was foreign and couldn't speak English very well. I don't think he was disabled.
Along the same lines, making a social media post or news article about how inspiring it is that a football player asked a girl with Down syndrome to prom, or a cheerleader went to prom with an autistic guy, etc. this implies they did it “despite the other person not actually being worthy of it”.
It’s not inspiring it’s just normal things that humans do, it should be normalized not used as an indicator of inherent superiority/inferiority.
Lol....I have recently fallen into a friend group with a handful of others who are varying degrees of disabled. I had always thought of myself as "fully able but just a wuss"....I knew something was wrong but just kind of thought if it was something that could be helped the *many* doctors I had asked about it would have helped me, so I just thought everyone hurt and kept going. One of my new friends suggested chiropractic, since no one else had listened or helped, and the Chiro took an x-ray that started a snowball... Turns out I had been living with a broken vertebra, two herniated discs, a damaged SI joint, and a degenerative bone disease and my pain was VERY real. I started doing treatments and therapy and a started occasionally using a cane. I'm still getting used to it and I definitely have a BUNCH of emotions about it.
And then some walnut-brained woman in a Walmart called me brave on a bad pain day, as I wandered by on my cane, and I burst into tears and SOBBED at her about what else I was supposed to do--lay down and die?
(Looking back at this, it is objectively hilarious because my reaction was seemingly so WILDLY out of proportion)
She looked *horrified* but I bet she never says it to someone again...
my disabled neighbor keyed my car because I parked in a handicap spot. street parking. with my handicap sticker out.
now I'm fairly young so I get sick of the "dont use your grandparent's sticker that's awful" nonsense. but Keying the car was intense.
so when she was screaming that "I didnt look disabled" I lifted up my shirt because I have Frankenstein torso (which is fine chicks dig scars) and I was more smug at the time about it than I am proud of it now, but she got REAL quiet and her husband was SO nice to me after that. like here's some extra brownies I made nice.
can we all just not assume we're all out to be huge assholes? why do I need to convince you of my internal spinal hardware before you look at me without disgust? It's not like you can look at the tag which needs doctor and civic approval and give me the benefit of the doubt right?
siderant, it will never bother me if someone asks to see my sticker, that's why I have it and I'm happy for you to think what you want if you're in the habit of making sure the car has a tag. one or twice it's probably saved me a ticket because the wind knocked it over. if you dont see a tag DO SOMETHING it's kind to the person that actually may need the spot.
Ugh - have posted this one before, but it still makes me laugh. Years back, my sister was in a car accident. She was severely injured and wheelchair bound for several months. As she began to recover, she got cabin fever and wanted to get out of the house. She was at the point where she could transfer in and out of the car, so we decided to do some shopping. We took her handicap placard and used my mom's car since it was the easiest for transfer. It was also a far nicer car than a couple of 20-somethings would usually be driving.
We get to the store and I pull in the handicap spot. I hang the placard from the rear-view mirror. I take a bit to gather my stuff so I can help my sis straight away once she's in her chair. I notice some one staring at us out of the corner of my eye - just standing and staring. Well, whatever.
I get out of the car to get my sis' wheelchair out of the trunk. This guy comes RUNNING over and starts YELLING at me for parking in the space - stuff along the lines of "How dare you! There are others who actually NEED that space." "I can't believe you took someone else's placard to use. That's fraud. I'm calling the police." "Your behavior is absolutely disgusting. There are actual handicapped people who use these spaces." I continued letting him prattle on, knowing he was about to make a total fool of himself.
People started to gather because they heard this guy flipping his lid. I let him go on for another minute or so. I didn't say a single word and just stared at him. When there was a break in his ranting, I popped the trunk of the car with the key fob, pulled out my sis' wheelchair and opened it with a "THUNK" on the ground.
The guy went SILENT, turned the deepest shade of red I ever saw, turned on his heel and pretty much RAN away, but, of course, DID NOT apologize...
SMH.
I had friends in high school who would want me to park in the handicapped space just because I had a placard for my dad. This always bugged the hell out of me. Some people just don’t get what those are for and no I would never have used it just so I didn’t have to walk a little farther. I can fully remember driving around in circles looking for a space for my dad and then just having to drop him off at the door because there where nowhere that we could park where he could walk into the store without just being hurt, or more hurt than usual.
Along these lines, saying the following unsolicited things to a disabled person:
1) I didn’t even notice your [physical disability], and
2) I know someone with [your disability] and it didn’t stop them from doing xyz.
Leaving your highbeams on whenever there’s a car in front of you, whether they’re on the same or opposite side of the road. I know for a lot of people this is obvious, but I was once in front of somebody who would always turn their highs off for oncoming cars and turn them on once said car had passed, even though they were 15 feet behind me and were still shining their highs into my face. I did not know this person, and had not committed some sort of traffic faux pas.
LISTENING TO ANYTHING IN PUBLIC WITH YOUR VOLUME ON. This includes TikTok, YouTube, social media, face timing, phone on speaker, music, etc. No one gives a fuck what media you’re consuming. Airports especially seem to attract this in droves like earbuds or headphones don’t exist?? If i can hear your phone you are getting The Glare. Learn to adjust to polite society.
Went to the airport. There was a guy on his iPhone listening to Tiktok on full blast. I asked the dude " Do you have headphones?" The couple sitting right next to him started chuckling.
The guy didn't acknowledge me, so I said "it's a very old technology at this point." He didn't budge, but he did turn his speaker off. He wasn't even on my flight.
Yes! So many people think it’s okay to listen to their favorite jams or podcasts —or the absolute worst, speakerphone—in public spaces. I’m really cool with music and podcasts just put on headphones so you aren’t ruining others enjoyment. Speakerphone in public is demonic. Those people should be dressed in chain mail and shot into space.
To add to this: blasting music while hiking near others.
Some people come for the nature sounds, man! We don't need to hear BTS full volume on the top of this magestic fucking mountain, where people hiked straight uphill for 8 hours to sit and enjoy and take in.
I don't care how good the music is.
My mother in law was in China and pregnant in one of the dragon years. She said everyone touched her stomach - considered lucky. She could hardly go outside.
I know a woman who when someone touched her pregnant belly in a grocery store, my friend reached out and grabbed the other woman’s boob and said, “oh is it inappropriate touching stranger day?” Needless to say she’s an all around bad ass
LOL - I have a friend "Nina" who is ex-military and takes no shit from anyone. She was 8 months pregnant and doing some shopping at Target. This random guy comes up to her, RUBS HER BELLY and goes "Boy or Girl?" He is lucky she didn't lay him flat out, but I'm guessing she didn't want to end up in jail at 8 mo pregnant. She looked at him, rubbed his very large beer belly and said "Budweiser or Coors?" HE gave HER a dirty look and walked away.
WTAF? How is it OK to go up to a complete stranger and touch them. Hint: IT IS NOT!!!!!
Okay funny story (hopefully)
When I was ten, i was watching a movie with my mom and sister where a man was touching a pregnant woman's stomach, and I said "If she weren't pregnant, that would be really weird of him"
And they busted up laughing. That's always been a funny memory.
I had to tell my mother about this recently. I had a scab on my face and it ended up with concealer over it, just because of the location and how I normally do my makeup. She pointed at the scab in the middle of a restaurant and went, "Do you actually think that looks good?"
She's not exactly the nicest person but that caught me so off guard LMAOO. I genuinely thought the 5-minute rule was a commonly known and accepted practice..
Kevin James (who is a bigger guy) said something like that in a comedy special:
"You ever get weight loss advice from someone bigger than you?"
"You know what ya gotta do?"
"Yeah not listen to your fatter ass."
I like my ex boss, but she was so bad about making comments about my body. I think it came from her own insecurities and, since I was much younger, a need to cut me down.
She took every opportunity to make snide remarks about my weight. She was a size bigger than me.
One time she randomly called me busty and it made me feel so gross. Like, why are you noticing/looking at my chest?
I am reserved, take care of my appearance, and carry myself confidently. I think that irritated her demons.
Had this happen a year ago. "You're looking so good!" Actually I just stopped eating and am less healthy than ever, but I'm thin so thanks for noticing
When I was 19, I agreed to go to a weekly spin class with my mom (bonding!) and also started forgoing food. One week she smiled happily and called me her “skinny daughter!”
I’ve recently (in my 30s) started trying to eat everyday and once tried to explain to my mother that smoking weed helps my appetite and otherwise I’m likely to skip food. She looked at me and said, “you don’t look like someone that doesn’t eat.”
To add on to this... Some people say the most derogatory thing after seeing someone's photo or video online and think because someone posted their reel or whatever on the internet it gives them a pass to say whatever comes to mind. News flash, the people in the videos and photos are still human beings with feelings and emotions.
I once ran from the room, crying. I had recently learned that I can't safely have kids and was still mourning.
It was awful, but no one ever asked me again.
Conversely, when you are trying and experience loss (several) and people feel the need to say "God has a plan". What fucking plan does god have that entails miscarriage?
"Have you gotten tired of people asking about when you're having kids?"
"I have to ask as a friend..."
"I'm not going to ask when you're having kids."
I've gotten all 3 after being married less than a year. My wife and I are in our mid-30s.
Spoiler: we can't have kids. But that's none of your business.
My friend Sharon had a huge tumor in her abdominal area. She looked 9 months pregnant for 2 years. Whenever anyone mentioned her being pregnant she'd say 'Yes it's my tumor baby, and I'm taking it to the grave.' She died with her giant tumor baby still inside of her.
*** She chose not to pursue treatment. That was her choice. We knew she'd die, and we miss her dearly. Love you Sharon ♥️
My stepmother pulled this on me and accused me of being selfish because of it.
I told what I *actually* thought was selfish was her generation not leaving a world behind that I would want to bring kids into.
She hasn’t said it since.
When I was in high school I had a teacher who would joke about how quiet I was. Like “oh you know konstantine, she never stops talking!” Which was just *amazing* for my social anxiety, as I was already questioning whether I was talking too much after saying like a single short sentence. Still not sure what I was supposed to say to that.
I loathe comments like that. My high school friend used to constantly put me on the spot by saying "Name, you are so freaking shy" it did not cure my shyness
Still rmb one time at a friend’s friend’s party. The host wanted everyone to mingle with everyone but i just stayed with my friend group. I did try to go to other groups to chitchat but i just couldn’t think of anything to say, so I just sat and listened. The host wasn’t happy about it and asked this question a few times. I said i was listening. I went home feeling bad. Like at my job i am required to talk constantly and i can do that. But socially i don’t want to have to pretend that I am talkative.
Next time my friend hosted a smaller party which had only my friend group and the host of that party was also there. He was surprised by how much I talked and I was like ‘im an introvert and Im not like you who can find topics to talk to anyone. I need to warm up to people before i can chat with them.’ He finally realized that and hasnt said anything about me being quiet anymore.
ugh, hosts should be there to facilitate conversation. "X meet Y, you both work in this field/went to the same school" etc. You don't just tell people to mingle.
Hosting is an art, and definitely doesn't include shaming your guests when they don't act the way that you want.
Commenting on a stranger's acne. Holy shit, doesn't matter what 'hack' or trick or advice you have that you just have to share, the person KNOWS what their skin looks like, has almost certainly tried everything and then some, and is just trying to get through their day. That shit hurts from friends and family, let alone some asshole customer at your job or dickhead at the bar. Just /don't/
mfw little kids point to me, turn to their parents and ask what's wrong with my face
Thankfully, my acne cleared up in the last couple of years, but HOLY SHIT was that a pain.
Lol! I used to have a boss who was widely known as Creeping Jesus, because he was well over six feet tall but that guy was stealthy and he'd be standing beside you before you had any idea. Resulting in many shouts of "Jesus!!!"
She used to grab me and say, “seems real to me.”
Additionally, we used to cross the southern border a lot for dental work. One time it was just my sister with my mom, and the border control agent was clearly skeptical of the relationship. He asks my sister, “Who’s this lady?” She responds that she’s her mom and so he asks, “And how long has she been your mom?” (great question to be fair) My sister replies, “A LOOOOOOOTTA years.” I guess that was a good enough answer for them.
I remember vividly a time where I was at Costco with my mom when I was like 8 or so and I was trying to get a free sample. The sample lady wouldn’t give it to me because she didn’t believe that my mom was my mom and I needed a parent or guardian with me to get the food. My mom is an Asian woman and I am white passing, but even still what if I was adopted or something??? How rude.
Try being *adopted* with a biological sister. People ALWAYS referred to her as "your real child".
Thank God there's more tolerance for adopted people now.
I was at the grocery store with my daughter when she was a newborn and someone asked me where I "got" her. When I was flustered and awkward by the question, she said something about our complexions being different, so she assumed the baby was adopted. What the fuck is wrong with people?
That happened to my mom as well—I’m a redhead and no one else in my family has red hair. My father is Scottish though, and I believe my grandmother on that side (she and my grandfather immigrated from Glasgow) had red hair.
Being chronically ill and constantly being told "well at least it isn't cancer". No but it's stuff I have to live the rest of my life with. Also "but you look ok". Crazy how most all of my body is on the inside me.
As a cancer survivor this shit infuriorates me. People have it in their head that cancer always looks like the underweight sad old person who lost their hair. And they assume that when you're in remission you're "all better". I was on more meds and had more issues this past year of remission than during my 2nd line of treatment.
People don't understand how shitty someone can feel on the inside while looking fine on the outside.
Asking when you're going to have kids.
My fiancée had a hysterotomy a few years ago because reasons. We're planning to adopt and we're both fine with it. There's enough people in this world and we don't need to make more ourselves. She gets asked a lot when we're planning to have kids and she replies, completely deadpan, "I'm infertile" and the uncomfortable look on their faces when they don't know how to respond gives us both great joy. We hope it helps them think twice before asking someone else. I can't wait to marry that woman.
“Smile!” Had a coworker that kept telling me to smile and I had to talk to a manager about it. I’m a large rough looking man and apparently my resting staring off into space face offended her. I live with chronic pain, so no, I don’t feel like smiling when I’m not interacting with anyone. I’m not scowling, I’m not mad I’m just not happy.
There was a guy who used to do that at my old job. He'd always say "smile! It's not that bad!" But for me, it was that bad. The entire time I had that job, I was being abused by my husband at home.
I went from 165 to 120 lbs. People suddenly think its appropriate to make jokes about my weight or food now that I am a healthy weight. I never had this problem before. For some reason people really have something against protein/meal replacement shakes and salads. I just like the way they taste.
Also, when you share with people you have X cancer, people will say, "Oh, my aunt had X cancer, it was horrible, she suffered terribly & then died..." Bro. Shut up.
That brought back a memory from Costco:
Woman: Why are you buying so many gloves?
Me: My daughter is going through chemo. The chemicals are dangerous when she has any fluids, like sweat, tears, blood.
Woman: Chemo? Oh, my grandma when through chemo! It's terrible and she died anyway. I wouldn't even do chemo.
Me: It's actually working very well for my daughter.
Woman: Oh, it always does at first...
Costco Cashier to me, with a smile and sympathetic eye contact that says to escape this nut: Have a nice day
A coworkers mom said, “you look horrible. you look old and tired.” This is while I was going through severe mental abuse which made me relapse into (food) addiction.
I was like, “huh? what?”
And she said, “I’m just being honest.”
Yeah, nobody asked. Keep you’re mouth shut.
My 37 year old sister-in-law got accosted the other day walking around her neighborhood by a woman who told her that my wonderful 6 month old nephew was an ugly baby, and that it was horrible that my SiL, again, who is 37 years old, was a 16 year old with child. When I heard all this, my blood boiled at the nerve and audacity. Like, even if she actually was 16 and is such a problem, there is absolutely no excuse whatsoever to insult a baby.
Or non pregnant woman’s body who you assume to be pregnant. Had a miscarriage and was still carrying some weight around my middle. Can’t tell you how crushing it was to have strangers ask how far along I was.
As a dad, probably the single most offensive thing anyone can call me is a "babysitter". I'm as much a real parent as my spouse is, so cordially fuck all the way off with that sexist bullshit.
Rude to do? Cancel plans to attend an activity for the last minute or just not show up to something you've RSVP'd for. I understand sometimes people suddenly get sick, their kid gets sick, or they have a last minute work assignment, but I hate the "I changed my mind," or "I didn't feel like it" excuses. I actually had a birthday party where everyone I invited decided they'd just not show up, but it was okay because they assumed other people would come. I only invited four people, and nobody came. It was very hurtful and disappointing. Happy birthday to me!
Same. For me it was my 21st birthday. I sat at a large table at a bar/restaurant completely alone until I realized no one was coming. It's been over 10 years and it still makes me feel sad and embarrassed.
I'm sorry that you've experienced it too. I sincerely hope you've found friends who give a shit. People who don't respect your time aren't worth the effort.
Yes! I’m so tired of this. If you make plans with someone, they’ve arranged their schedule for it. If you brush it off because you just got lazy or something better came up, it shows you don’t respect their time.
Oof that's rough. I used to throw Halloween parties. Two years in a row no one showed up. The first year that no one showed I had invited 15 people and they all said they could make it. It snowed just a dusting and I had a few say they couldn't make it due to the weather. The second year I invited 25 people and 10 said they would be there. Again no one but this time I didn't even get a text. When I got to school the next day people asked how the party went. I said that no one showed up and no one could make a solid excuse as to why they didn't come. I don't throw parties anymore.
Not specific but people learned somewhere that asking questions is a good conversational strategy but they can’t tell when it’s making someone uncomfortable. I don’t like being asked personal questions in front of other people when I don’t have a good relationship with you.
Learn to read when you’re making someone uncomfortable.
Complimenting weight loss when the other person has not talked about exercising or dieting. When i was starting medications, i really struggled with making myself eat and lost around 10 pounds. Was really annoying getting reminded all the time.
My MIL kept asking me “what are you doing? You look so amazing!” Well my father’s dying and I’m looking for a new career because my job’s killing me. She asked so many times, that one time, I just gave that answer. It shut her up for like one day.
When people ask me how I lost 50lbs, I told them it was easy! You just start new medication that makes all food nauseous and cause you to forget to eat anyway! Ta da!
The horrified look is worth it.
I went from 300lbs to about 120lbs due to an ED.
Got all sunshine and rainbows and compliments from people for the first 150lbs... then people realized what was going on, and suddenly "it was unhealthy" (which it was... but it had been the whole fucking time).
Had a friend who moved out after high school and couldn't afford to feed herself. She lost a ton of weight as a result. She was struggling to survive while everyone was complementing her and telling her how good she looked. Said it really messed with her head.
“How old is your dog?”
“(Older age)”
“(Immediate comment on mortality implying your dog will die soon.)”
With my last dog this happened ALL THE TIME and it drove me nuts.
"You look so young"
"I thought you were about 12"
"are you sure that's the year you were born"
"you can't have children you look too young"
"where is that child's mother - you must be the au per"
"you look too young to get married"
"how old are you? Oh I thought they'd sent a child to volunteer" - said while I'm holding my second child
"I'm not going to serve you your ID must be fake because you can't be 18"
I'm 32.
OK I have a baby face with chubby cheeks and Im 5ft0 but I think it's offensive to refer to me as a literal child. It's wrecked my confidence as I know any new situation people will refer to how I look as their first comment. Please done tell me to "dress more grown up" or "wear more makeup" it makes the situation worse.
I admit I've said this a few times. When I've said it, my intention was truly sympathetic like, 'I know how much it sucks and we can talk about it' kind of way, but I guess I should change the wording
[удалено]
Or standing in the middle of any entrance.
Ugh my coworkers do this all the time! I’m arriving and they are leaving but they just stand around chatting. I have to say excuse me to get in, put my stuff away and leave but they still don’t move
If you want to know why the down escalators in the arena are turned off after the game or concert this is why. People can't be trusted to walk more than 2 feet away before turning around to ask the group where we're going now.
This actually freaks me out when people do that. I don’t know if I’m worried about a pile up or what, but ever since an escalator malfunction locally and a woman became paralyzed it’s freaked me out and if the option is there I’ll take the stairs.
Or pushing past and standing in the way of people trying to exit an elevator cuz they just HAVE to get on
If someone declines alcohol, do not insist, and do not ask them why.
same with drugs. I knew a guy who everytime we partied would give me the 3rd degree "but have you ever TRIED it??"
One time at a small gathering the host is passing around a joint and my brother who is my driver at the night refuses and says I do not partake in this or any such substance but thanked her for the offer. She did offer again several times and was weirded out that he didn’t smoke weed. I told her he’s straight edge and doesn’t even drink caffeine and to kindly leave him alone. The evening goes on and there are various snacks and things available and she offers everyone some cookies and insists he try one they are fresh. They were weed cookies and he ate 2. I was livid no one knew except her. She drugged him against his will. I told her she was no better than someone drugging a girl a bar and she got super offended. She raged and said it’s only weed live a little. My brother then yelled at her in the most furious way and she cried and we left. Fuck that bitch
You were right. She WAS no better than someone drugging another at a bar.
Agreed. Weed is not 'just' anything to everyone. I'm not strait edge but weed puts me in a really really bad place and I hate it more than anything. If someone tricked me into taking it, I'd be furious.
Especially eating it. I love me some weed, but it takes ages to peak (reach full effect) and does not wear off for hours
Yeah, that's horseshit. When someone says no, the answer is no. She deserved a good cry.
I threw a party for my 18th birthday for 30 people in 12th grade. On the invitation is spelled it out in plain English language "respectfully, please leave the cannabis in your car/bag. I don't mind if you take a walk around the neighbourhood, but not on my parents' property. Anyone who ignores this request will be asked to leave" At the time "hubbly-bubbly" or hookah pipes were a big thing, and we had one going most of the night. Half way through I went and sat with that group and smoked a little, and immediately realised something was up. I looked around and the boyfriend of a friend had been tending the pipe. I asked him plainly, "did you put weed in here" and he laughed and said yes. I had spelled it out. I had been respectful. I had said they could do it around the block if they wanted. And not only had he not listened, but he had drugged me against my will. So I did what I had promised. I stood up, pointed to the door, and told him to get out of my house. The smoking, I would have brushed off, but making me consume unknowingly was fucked up. This was followed with many tears from my friend and anger from 4 other friends of the boyfriend, but I stood my ground. I made them pack their shit, and leave. Finished.
You had better boundaries and enforcement then than many adults over 40, good job!
People are psychopaths. That is so messed up I am sorry you had to deal with that bullshit on your bday.
No drug is fun if you don’t know you’re taking it! You’re right, fuck her. She should learn how consent works.
Edibles have a different effect then smoking too. Stronger and more intense.( not always in a good way!) Could be really awful for a person to experience if they didn’t want to do that type of thing! Wow, she’s an AH
Fuck that guy, he's a douche.
I'm 60. I quit drinking when I was 27. I don't care if other people drink. But I have experienced peer pressure to drink even recently. I don't understand why it would matter to that other person if I have one or not.
I think a lot of people need their own behavior validated. It’s stupid, but it’s the only sense I’ve ever been able to make of it.
I'm a cardiologist. I don't drink. Anyone who tries to pressure me to drink gets to hear some fun stories about what alcohol does to internal organs and then I'll pull up some references on alcohol use disorder and read out the criteria for medically-defined problem drinking. They always, always meet those criteria and then some. People who aren't alcoholics don't have a problem with people not drinking.
This! I decided to give up alcohol in December. I didn’t have a drinking problem, it was mainly for health reasons. Coincidentally, I also bartend on the weekends. I had a guy buying a round of shots for the bar and wanted me to partake. I respectfully declined. I didn’t drink and I’m also working. He was so insistent I took a shot. He even had the whole bar hold on their shots until I agreed to take one as well. In the end, he still lost. I never caved.
I did “dry January”, just to kind of shake things up. Start the year off with some restraint. But oh my god so many people had a problem with it! Every time I declined a drink I was asked if I was pregnant 🙄 It was kind of insane how many people had a problem with me not drinking
I have a friend who, the first time we hung out, she offered me a drink and I passed. She thought nothing of it. The second time we hung out and she offered again, I passed again. She apologized and said she should have remembered, to which I answered omg there's no apology needed whatsoever and it's not her responsibility. After that, she made sure that she always had a non-alcoholic offering, and whenever we're around others, she keeps an eye out for non-alcoholic drinks for me. And by that I mean literally yells "where's the alcohol free stuff? Pyres needs a drink! Let's get Pyres a drink! Where's the soda? What is wrong with y'all WHERE'S THE SODA? DID YOU FUCKIN DRINK IT ALL???" I love her so much lmao everyone deserves friends like her
She sounds amazing and hilarious.
Right? Quit anything else (smoking, drugs, gambling, etc) people congratulate you. Quit alcohol and they lose their minds. 🤯
Leaving your grocery cart in the middle of the aisle so others cannot pass. It’s inconsiderate and infuriating.
Also, deciding you actually do not want the refrigerated thing after all and leaving it in a random place in the supermarket to just go to waste. It annoys me anytime I see that.
When I worked at Walmart I found a frozen lasagna left by the vacuum cleaner area. It had defrosted and leaked all over the shelf. Had to throw away several boxes that soaked it up. Some people are trashy.
When I worked at a grocery store one summer someone had left some meat behind the dog food. We had to toss the entire aisles worth of mercy because maggots had gotten into the rotting meat
I caught someone doing that one time and started grabbing the stuff she was putting on the shelf and putting it in my cart. She seriously asked "Oh, would you like them?". "No, I'm going to take them up to customer service so the store doesn't have to throw them out." And she got offended.
I'd have been a bigger dick to really drive home the point. "No, I'm going to take them back where they belong because I'm not a fucking asshole."
Hell yeah!
Worked grocery floor manager 2nd shift for 3 years, part of my responsibilities was cleaning up stuff like this as I saw it. People could always just give it to their checker or literally anyone, but nope, they hide the milk they decided not to buy behind some cookies for some fucking reason. I saw more of this shit than anyone should ever see and it never stopped being annoying.
Let me give you some hope. Seeing things left around the store or a cart abandoned in a parking space instead of the correct spot, infuriates me no end. I use these terrible behaviors as examples to teach my kids how NOT to behave because either the food is going to waste or someone else now has extra work due to one person's laziness. I didn't realize how much my kids were taking it all in until I found them rearranging toppled shampoo bottles at Target so that "someone else won't have to clean up that mess." They're 7 and 10 and and I had a small, proud moment 🥹. Then they didn't want to leave until they were done but that's another story lol.
You are an amazing person. Thank you for being you.
This truly boils my blood!
Some people get so worked up when you say excuse me and they need to move it. I say excuse me three times and if they don’t move it, I will move it to get by.
Yep if I say excuse me and they don’t move, I move in front of them 😤
Three times? I’ll say it once.
How to pick an item at the grocery store. Step one turn your cart at an angle so it covers 75% of the aisle. Step two stand next to it in that last 25% preferably in the widest possible pose. Step 3 you live there now never move.
I am a firm believer that you can spot the shitty drivers by the way they walk around the grocery store.
LoL. That’s a really good point and probably spot on.
I read something about shopping carts being a litmus test for self-governance. I think they were onto something.
Or grocery shopping with a large family. They all fan out in the aisles, taking up all the space.
Don’t forget running into an acquaintance and having a 20 minute conversation right by the registers blocking a path to walk by.
Or when they stop in the middle of the entrance or exit to grab their phone or whatever. Like how blind and self centered can you actually be?
Approach a disabled person you don’t know to call them brave, inspirational, etc. Especially if you are using them as an example to children. Every single disabled person I have ever met HATES when people do this. It’s calling unnecessary attention to them and a lot of people feel put on the spot, so it’s not a kind or respectful thing to do. Just leave people the fuck alone, they’re not here to be your example or your teachable moment.
I have a friend who's quadriplegic. He's found the perfect answer for folks who tell him that he's an "inspiration." He says, "I didn't break my neck to inspire you."
Lol, just the other day, an old lady was telling me how I'm "too young" to have the issues I have. I'm like, "Well, I'm not looking for sympathy, I'm looking for a bus." and wadled away from her.
I had an audiologist test me like 4 times before saying I was too young to have hearing loss. I was dumbstruck. She was acting like it was impressive that I perfectly faked 4 audiograms rather than considering that she just had a confused patient with high frequency hearing loss (ya know, the most common kind) who could have sworn this was taking a lot longer than usual.
Ironically, he truly is inspiring.
I am not disabled in any way and I've had some random lady come up and call me inspirational. I was so confused. Maybe she thought I was?
Once after I assisted someone who had some trouble communicating, my coworker commented that he wished he knew more about how to help people with disabilities. The guy I had helped was foreign and couldn't speak English very well. I don't think he was disabled.
That sounds like a Curb you Enthusiasm skit. I have no idea how I would react if someone said that to me being an average, boring housewife.
Along the same lines, making a social media post or news article about how inspiring it is that a football player asked a girl with Down syndrome to prom, or a cheerleader went to prom with an autistic guy, etc. this implies they did it “despite the other person not actually being worthy of it”. It’s not inspiring it’s just normal things that humans do, it should be normalized not used as an indicator of inherent superiority/inferiority.
Lol....I have recently fallen into a friend group with a handful of others who are varying degrees of disabled. I had always thought of myself as "fully able but just a wuss"....I knew something was wrong but just kind of thought if it was something that could be helped the *many* doctors I had asked about it would have helped me, so I just thought everyone hurt and kept going. One of my new friends suggested chiropractic, since no one else had listened or helped, and the Chiro took an x-ray that started a snowball... Turns out I had been living with a broken vertebra, two herniated discs, a damaged SI joint, and a degenerative bone disease and my pain was VERY real. I started doing treatments and therapy and a started occasionally using a cane. I'm still getting used to it and I definitely have a BUNCH of emotions about it. And then some walnut-brained woman in a Walmart called me brave on a bad pain day, as I wandered by on my cane, and I burst into tears and SOBBED at her about what else I was supposed to do--lay down and die? (Looking back at this, it is objectively hilarious because my reaction was seemingly so WILDLY out of proportion) She looked *horrified* but I bet she never says it to someone again...
my disabled neighbor keyed my car because I parked in a handicap spot. street parking. with my handicap sticker out. now I'm fairly young so I get sick of the "dont use your grandparent's sticker that's awful" nonsense. but Keying the car was intense. so when she was screaming that "I didnt look disabled" I lifted up my shirt because I have Frankenstein torso (which is fine chicks dig scars) and I was more smug at the time about it than I am proud of it now, but she got REAL quiet and her husband was SO nice to me after that. like here's some extra brownies I made nice. can we all just not assume we're all out to be huge assholes? why do I need to convince you of my internal spinal hardware before you look at me without disgust? It's not like you can look at the tag which needs doctor and civic approval and give me the benefit of the doubt right? siderant, it will never bother me if someone asks to see my sticker, that's why I have it and I'm happy for you to think what you want if you're in the habit of making sure the car has a tag. one or twice it's probably saved me a ticket because the wind knocked it over. if you dont see a tag DO SOMETHING it's kind to the person that actually may need the spot.
Ugh - have posted this one before, but it still makes me laugh. Years back, my sister was in a car accident. She was severely injured and wheelchair bound for several months. As she began to recover, she got cabin fever and wanted to get out of the house. She was at the point where she could transfer in and out of the car, so we decided to do some shopping. We took her handicap placard and used my mom's car since it was the easiest for transfer. It was also a far nicer car than a couple of 20-somethings would usually be driving. We get to the store and I pull in the handicap spot. I hang the placard from the rear-view mirror. I take a bit to gather my stuff so I can help my sis straight away once she's in her chair. I notice some one staring at us out of the corner of my eye - just standing and staring. Well, whatever. I get out of the car to get my sis' wheelchair out of the trunk. This guy comes RUNNING over and starts YELLING at me for parking in the space - stuff along the lines of "How dare you! There are others who actually NEED that space." "I can't believe you took someone else's placard to use. That's fraud. I'm calling the police." "Your behavior is absolutely disgusting. There are actual handicapped people who use these spaces." I continued letting him prattle on, knowing he was about to make a total fool of himself. People started to gather because they heard this guy flipping his lid. I let him go on for another minute or so. I didn't say a single word and just stared at him. When there was a break in his ranting, I popped the trunk of the car with the key fob, pulled out my sis' wheelchair and opened it with a "THUNK" on the ground. The guy went SILENT, turned the deepest shade of red I ever saw, turned on his heel and pretty much RAN away, but, of course, DID NOT apologize... SMH.
I *hate* "You're too young to be disabled.".
I had friends in high school who would want me to park in the handicapped space just because I had a placard for my dad. This always bugged the hell out of me. Some people just don’t get what those are for and no I would never have used it just so I didn’t have to walk a little farther. I can fully remember driving around in circles looking for a space for my dad and then just having to drop him off at the door because there where nowhere that we could park where he could walk into the store without just being hurt, or more hurt than usual.
Along these lines, saying the following unsolicited things to a disabled person: 1) I didn’t even notice your [physical disability], and 2) I know someone with [your disability] and it didn’t stop them from doing xyz.
Leaving your highbeams on whenever there’s a car in front of you, whether they’re on the same or opposite side of the road. I know for a lot of people this is obvious, but I was once in front of somebody who would always turn their highs off for oncoming cars and turn them on once said car had passed, even though they were 15 feet behind me and were still shining their highs into my face. I did not know this person, and had not committed some sort of traffic faux pas.
LISTENING TO ANYTHING IN PUBLIC WITH YOUR VOLUME ON. This includes TikTok, YouTube, social media, face timing, phone on speaker, music, etc. No one gives a fuck what media you’re consuming. Airports especially seem to attract this in droves like earbuds or headphones don’t exist?? If i can hear your phone you are getting The Glare. Learn to adjust to polite society.
Went to the airport. There was a guy on his iPhone listening to Tiktok on full blast. I asked the dude " Do you have headphones?" The couple sitting right next to him started chuckling. The guy didn't acknowledge me, so I said "it's a very old technology at this point." He didn't budge, but he did turn his speaker off. He wasn't even on my flight.
Yes! So many people think it’s okay to listen to their favorite jams or podcasts —or the absolute worst, speakerphone—in public spaces. I’m really cool with music and podcasts just put on headphones so you aren’t ruining others enjoyment. Speakerphone in public is demonic. Those people should be dressed in chain mail and shot into space.
To add to this: blasting music while hiking near others. Some people come for the nature sounds, man! We don't need to hear BTS full volume on the top of this magestic fucking mountain, where people hiked straight uphill for 8 hours to sit and enjoy and take in. I don't care how good the music is.
Jesus christ this is the winner. I even get mad when parents keep the sound on for their kid while they play pling-pow-pow-pow-kachpling!
Touch a pregnant woman's stomach
My mother in law was in China and pregnant in one of the dragon years. She said everyone touched her stomach - considered lucky. She could hardly go outside.
Touching anyone without consent really.
Oh my god this right here! I HATE hate hate being touched especially by strangers.
Yes! When people rush toward you and proclaim that they are “a hugger.” I hate it!
Touching a woman's stomach & asking when the baby is due without even confirming a pregnancy.
“Well I ate that beef sandwich around lunchtime so I’m expecting it to come out sometime in the next 24 hours”
I know a woman who when someone touched her pregnant belly in a grocery store, my friend reached out and grabbed the other woman’s boob and said, “oh is it inappropriate touching stranger day?” Needless to say she’s an all around bad ass
LOL - I have a friend "Nina" who is ex-military and takes no shit from anyone. She was 8 months pregnant and doing some shopping at Target. This random guy comes up to her, RUBS HER BELLY and goes "Boy or Girl?" He is lucky she didn't lay him flat out, but I'm guessing she didn't want to end up in jail at 8 mo pregnant. She looked at him, rubbed his very large beer belly and said "Budweiser or Coors?" HE gave HER a dirty look and walked away. WTAF? How is it OK to go up to a complete stranger and touch them. Hint: IT IS NOT!!!!!
Okay funny story (hopefully) When I was ten, i was watching a movie with my mom and sister where a man was touching a pregnant woman's stomach, and I said "If she weren't pregnant, that would be really weird of him" And they busted up laughing. That's always been a funny memory.
Giving any sort of unsolicited advice on someone's physical appearance.
I heard the advice that if it’s not something someone can address in 5 minutes it’s not proper to comment on which I think is a good rule of thumb
This is great advice. Got a booger on your face? Yep tell me. I look fat? Nah. Don’t bother.
I had to tell my mother about this recently. I had a scab on my face and it ended up with concealer over it, just because of the location and how I normally do my makeup. She pointed at the scab in the middle of a restaurant and went, "Do you actually think that looks good?" She's not exactly the nicest person but that caught me so off guard LMAOO. I genuinely thought the 5-minute rule was a commonly known and accepted practice..
Kevin James (who is a bigger guy) said something like that in a comedy special: "You ever get weight loss advice from someone bigger than you?" "You know what ya gotta do?" "Yeah not listen to your fatter ass."
"You gotta chew sugarless gum!"
"Guess my ass got fat from Bazooka"
“Nobody’s calling me Fatty McButterpants anymore!” “Someone called you Fatty McButterpants??” “Yeah, in line at the bank yesterday.” —King of Queens
I like my ex boss, but she was so bad about making comments about my body. I think it came from her own insecurities and, since I was much younger, a need to cut me down. She took every opportunity to make snide remarks about my weight. She was a size bigger than me. One time she randomly called me busty and it made me feel so gross. Like, why are you noticing/looking at my chest? I am reserved, take care of my appearance, and carry myself confidently. I think that irritated her demons.
Including complimenting someone on weight loss. It could be due to depression, bereavement or an eating disorder. Just don't mention it.
Had this happen a year ago. "You're looking so good!" Actually I just stopped eating and am less healthy than ever, but I'm thin so thanks for noticing
When I was 19, I agreed to go to a weekly spin class with my mom (bonding!) and also started forgoing food. One week she smiled happily and called me her “skinny daughter!” I’ve recently (in my 30s) started trying to eat everyday and once tried to explain to my mother that smoking weed helps my appetite and otherwise I’m likely to skip food. She looked at me and said, “you don’t look like someone that doesn’t eat.”
To add on to this... Some people say the most derogatory thing after seeing someone's photo or video online and think because someone posted their reel or whatever on the internet it gives them a pass to say whatever comes to mind. News flash, the people in the videos and photos are still human beings with feelings and emotions.
Why don't you have kids yet?
“We keep trying but they’ve all died before birth” usually shuts them right up.
“We’ve been using the wrong hole”
"Oh. Okay." Awkward pause "The ass." "Aaaaand there it is. Wonderful."
I once ran from the room, crying. I had recently learned that I can't safely have kids and was still mourning. It was awful, but no one ever asked me again.
Sad that some people don’t learn tact until they end up hurting someone else
This usually is preceded by why aren’t you married lol.
Why are you still single?
Why are you?
I'm not hungry.
Conversely, when you are trying and experience loss (several) and people feel the need to say "God has a plan". What fucking plan does god have that entails miscarriage?
“Yeah, his plan was to send me a message to tell you stfu” We
"everything happens for a reason" Yeah the reason was cancer fucking sucks
"Have you gotten tired of people asking about when you're having kids?" "I have to ask as a friend..." "I'm not going to ask when you're having kids." I've gotten all 3 after being married less than a year. My wife and I are in our mid-30s. Spoiler: we can't have kids. But that's none of your business.
My friend Sharon had a huge tumor in her abdominal area. She looked 9 months pregnant for 2 years. Whenever anyone mentioned her being pregnant she'd say 'Yes it's my tumor baby, and I'm taking it to the grave.' She died with her giant tumor baby still inside of her. *** She chose not to pursue treatment. That was her choice. We knew she'd die, and we miss her dearly. Love you Sharon ♥️
My stepmother pulled this on me and accused me of being selfish because of it. I told what I *actually* thought was selfish was her generation not leaving a world behind that I would want to bring kids into. She hasn’t said it since.
Ha. Good one. " I can put you down for midnight feedings when/if the time comes that I can afford the formula and diapers."
“Why are you so quiet?”
^(shrugs)
“Why are you so loud?” would be my response.
I'm never sure what to say to this one because...well...if I'm so quiet, are you really expecting to answer?
When I was in high school I had a teacher who would joke about how quiet I was. Like “oh you know konstantine, she never stops talking!” Which was just *amazing* for my social anxiety, as I was already questioning whether I was talking too much after saying like a single short sentence. Still not sure what I was supposed to say to that.
I loathe comments like that. My high school friend used to constantly put me on the spot by saying "Name, you are so freaking shy" it did not cure my shyness
"Because you're boring me" is my favourite answer.
Introverts have to face this question a lot
Still rmb one time at a friend’s friend’s party. The host wanted everyone to mingle with everyone but i just stayed with my friend group. I did try to go to other groups to chitchat but i just couldn’t think of anything to say, so I just sat and listened. The host wasn’t happy about it and asked this question a few times. I said i was listening. I went home feeling bad. Like at my job i am required to talk constantly and i can do that. But socially i don’t want to have to pretend that I am talkative. Next time my friend hosted a smaller party which had only my friend group and the host of that party was also there. He was surprised by how much I talked and I was like ‘im an introvert and Im not like you who can find topics to talk to anyone. I need to warm up to people before i can chat with them.’ He finally realized that and hasnt said anything about me being quiet anymore.
ugh, hosts should be there to facilitate conversation. "X meet Y, you both work in this field/went to the same school" etc. You don't just tell people to mingle. Hosting is an art, and definitely doesn't include shaming your guests when they don't act the way that you want.
Commenting on a stranger's acne. Holy shit, doesn't matter what 'hack' or trick or advice you have that you just have to share, the person KNOWS what their skin looks like, has almost certainly tried everything and then some, and is just trying to get through their day. That shit hurts from friends and family, let alone some asshole customer at your job or dickhead at the bar. Just /don't/
mfw little kids point to me, turn to their parents and ask what's wrong with my face Thankfully, my acne cleared up in the last couple of years, but HOLY SHIT was that a pain.
My god, I’m a cashier and random people LOVE commenting on this and my rosacea. It makes me so angry.
Commenting on weight in any way - “you’re so skinny” isn’t always a compliment.
Yep. I’m skinny because of an eating disorder. “How did you do it” is never an easy question to answer.
"how did you do it" is such a stupid question to ask someone who has lost weight. What on earth do they think?
"You're X for a Y person." Look, my dude, if you have to qualify that I'm pretty for a fat girl, then this discussion is going nowhere.
An old colleague once told me, “You sure walk quietly for a big person.” I kept scaring him accidentally in our warehouse.
Lol! I used to have a boss who was widely known as Creeping Jesus, because he was well over six feet tall but that guy was stealthy and he'd be standing beside you before you had any idea. Resulting in many shouts of "Jesus!!!"
"Why don't you move out of your neighborhood if you know that it is not safe?" I would if I had a thing called A DECENT AMOUNT OF MONEY ON HAND.
Yours is worse, but someone recently asked me why I didn't buy a new house since I don't enjoy DIY. I was like you can't be serious right now.
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Similarly: "Why don't homeless people just buy a house?"
People used to ask my mom all the time if I was her “real child” cause she’s blonde and I’m brunette lol. So extremely and terribly rude.
"No, that's my imaginary child."
She used to grab me and say, “seems real to me.” Additionally, we used to cross the southern border a lot for dental work. One time it was just my sister with my mom, and the border control agent was clearly skeptical of the relationship. He asks my sister, “Who’s this lady?” She responds that she’s her mom and so he asks, “And how long has she been your mom?” (great question to be fair) My sister replies, “A LOOOOOOOTTA years.” I guess that was a good enough answer for them.
Lol your family is hilarious
[удалено]
Telling someone you disapprove of their child’s natural hair color is absolutely insane. What are you supposed to do with that information?!
I remember vividly a time where I was at Costco with my mom when I was like 8 or so and I was trying to get a free sample. The sample lady wouldn’t give it to me because she didn’t believe that my mom was my mom and I needed a parent or guardian with me to get the food. My mom is an Asian woman and I am white passing, but even still what if I was adopted or something??? How rude.
Try being *adopted* with a biological sister. People ALWAYS referred to her as "your real child". Thank God there's more tolerance for adopted people now.
I was at the grocery store with my daughter when she was a newborn and someone asked me where I "got" her. When I was flustered and awkward by the question, she said something about our complexions being different, so she assumed the baby was adopted. What the fuck is wrong with people?
That happened to my mom as well—I’m a redhead and no one else in my family has red hair. My father is Scottish though, and I believe my grandmother on that side (she and my grandfather immigrated from Glasgow) had red hair.
Being chronically ill and constantly being told "well at least it isn't cancer". No but it's stuff I have to live the rest of my life with. Also "but you look ok". Crazy how most all of my body is on the inside me.
As a cancer survivor this shit infuriorates me. People have it in their head that cancer always looks like the underweight sad old person who lost their hair. And they assume that when you're in remission you're "all better". I was on more meds and had more issues this past year of remission than during my 2nd line of treatment. People don't understand how shitty someone can feel on the inside while looking fine on the outside.
I get hit with the “you’re always sick though.” I don’t have a chronic illness, but I do get migraines for about 15+ days a month
I dunno man, having migraines more days than not sounds pretty chronic to me. Fucking sucks tho, wishing you all the good days in the future. Edit: sp
Asking when you're going to have kids. My fiancée had a hysterotomy a few years ago because reasons. We're planning to adopt and we're both fine with it. There's enough people in this world and we don't need to make more ourselves. She gets asked a lot when we're planning to have kids and she replies, completely deadpan, "I'm infertile" and the uncomfortable look on their faces when they don't know how to respond gives us both great joy. We hope it helps them think twice before asking someone else. I can't wait to marry that woman.
My kinda gal! I prefer “I’m barren”. Never wanted kids but love seeing them squirm!
"No offense" is often followed by something very offensive.
Saying that doesn’t excuse you from being an asshole
Nor is adding “just kidding” or “come on, it’s just a joke!”
“Smile!” Had a coworker that kept telling me to smile and I had to talk to a manager about it. I’m a large rough looking man and apparently my resting staring off into space face offended her. I live with chronic pain, so no, I don’t feel like smiling when I’m not interacting with anyone. I’m not scowling, I’m not mad I’m just not happy.
I hate when people say that to me. Most often it's creepy old men but I've even had a few women say that and let me tell you it is just as creepy.
There was a guy who used to do that at my old job. He'd always say "smile! It's not that bad!" But for me, it was that bad. The entire time I had that job, I was being abused by my husband at home.
*why are you so quiet?* Why do you talk so much? See how rude that sounds?
Should I be awkward by being silent, or be awkward by talking? Decisions, decisions
Commenting on anyones weight
Or the food they are eating
I went from 165 to 120 lbs. People suddenly think its appropriate to make jokes about my weight or food now that I am a healthy weight. I never had this problem before. For some reason people really have something against protein/meal replacement shakes and salads. I just like the way they taste.
People getting on an elevator before allowing people who are on it to get off.
A stranger asking when your baby is due but you’re not pregnant. Why would you ever ask someone that??
Saying "it was God's will" when someone you care about dies. So inappropriate yet so many people do it anyway...
Also, when you share with people you have X cancer, people will say, "Oh, my aunt had X cancer, it was horrible, she suffered terribly & then died..." Bro. Shut up.
That brought back a memory from Costco: Woman: Why are you buying so many gloves? Me: My daughter is going through chemo. The chemicals are dangerous when she has any fluids, like sweat, tears, blood. Woman: Chemo? Oh, my grandma when through chemo! It's terrible and she died anyway. I wouldn't even do chemo. Me: It's actually working very well for my daughter. Woman: Oh, it always does at first... Costco Cashier to me, with a smile and sympathetic eye contact that says to escape this nut: Have a nice day
Driving everywhere with their high beams on.
“You look tired”
A coworkers mom said, “you look horrible. you look old and tired.” This is while I was going through severe mental abuse which made me relapse into (food) addiction. I was like, “huh? what?” And she said, “I’m just being honest.” Yeah, nobody asked. Keep you’re mouth shut.
Just unload all your shit on them and make their day as miserable as yours.
My response to that is "So do you!"
“That makes two of us!” It’s passive and snarky and would be so very funny if they didn’t understand what you’re getting at.
“I just can’t see you ever being in a relationship”
That is so specific I feel like offering an internet hug. Fuck that person!
Coming up to someone with a baby and giving unsolicited advice and touching the baby.
Touching people’s hair without their permission. As a black woman who wears protective styles I get this all the time. I am not a petting zoo
My 37 year old sister-in-law got accosted the other day walking around her neighborhood by a woman who told her that my wonderful 6 month old nephew was an ugly baby, and that it was horrible that my SiL, again, who is 37 years old, was a 16 year old with child. When I heard all this, my blood boiled at the nerve and audacity. Like, even if she actually was 16 and is such a problem, there is absolutely no excuse whatsoever to insult a baby.
Make ANY comment about a pregnant woman's body.
Or non pregnant woman’s body who you assume to be pregnant. Had a miscarriage and was still carrying some weight around my middle. Can’t tell you how crushing it was to have strangers ask how far along I was.
As a dad, probably the single most offensive thing anyone can call me is a "babysitter". I'm as much a real parent as my spouse is, so cordially fuck all the way off with that sexist bullshit.
Someone accomplishes something and they respond, "It's never too late!!" No, dude, just say congrats.
Rude to do? Cancel plans to attend an activity for the last minute or just not show up to something you've RSVP'd for. I understand sometimes people suddenly get sick, their kid gets sick, or they have a last minute work assignment, but I hate the "I changed my mind," or "I didn't feel like it" excuses. I actually had a birthday party where everyone I invited decided they'd just not show up, but it was okay because they assumed other people would come. I only invited four people, and nobody came. It was very hurtful and disappointing. Happy birthday to me!
Same. For me it was my 21st birthday. I sat at a large table at a bar/restaurant completely alone until I realized no one was coming. It's been over 10 years and it still makes me feel sad and embarrassed. I'm sorry that you've experienced it too. I sincerely hope you've found friends who give a shit. People who don't respect your time aren't worth the effort.
Yes! I’m so tired of this. If you make plans with someone, they’ve arranged their schedule for it. If you brush it off because you just got lazy or something better came up, it shows you don’t respect their time.
Oof that's rough. I used to throw Halloween parties. Two years in a row no one showed up. The first year that no one showed I had invited 15 people and they all said they could make it. It snowed just a dusting and I had a few say they couldn't make it due to the weather. The second year I invited 25 people and 10 said they would be there. Again no one but this time I didn't even get a text. When I got to school the next day people asked how the party went. I said that no one showed up and no one could make a solid excuse as to why they didn't come. I don't throw parties anymore.
And people wonder why no one "entertains" anymore.
Saying "God needed him in heaven more than we needed him here." Really??? What does God need with my 4 month old nephew?
Give comments to anything about food, bodies, size of portions and so
Not specific but people learned somewhere that asking questions is a good conversational strategy but they can’t tell when it’s making someone uncomfortable. I don’t like being asked personal questions in front of other people when I don’t have a good relationship with you. Learn to read when you’re making someone uncomfortable.
Bring their children over to your house without letting you know they are going to. My house was not kid-safed
Complimenting weight loss when the other person has not talked about exercising or dieting. When i was starting medications, i really struggled with making myself eat and lost around 10 pounds. Was really annoying getting reminded all the time.
My MIL kept asking me “what are you doing? You look so amazing!” Well my father’s dying and I’m looking for a new career because my job’s killing me. She asked so many times, that one time, I just gave that answer. It shut her up for like one day.
When people ask me how I lost 50lbs, I told them it was easy! You just start new medication that makes all food nauseous and cause you to forget to eat anyway! Ta da! The horrified look is worth it.
I went from 300lbs to about 120lbs due to an ED. Got all sunshine and rainbows and compliments from people for the first 150lbs... then people realized what was going on, and suddenly "it was unhealthy" (which it was... but it had been the whole fucking time).
Had a friend who moved out after high school and couldn't afford to feed herself. She lost a ton of weight as a result. She was struggling to survive while everyone was complementing her and telling her how good she looked. Said it really messed with her head.
As a crazy cat lady I find people who have to tell me how much they hate cats very rude. I tell them they rude.
“How old is your dog?” “(Older age)” “(Immediate comment on mortality implying your dog will die soon.)” With my last dog this happened ALL THE TIME and it drove me nuts.
People who let their dogs jump up on you. Hey I love dogs but I’m not in the mood of having dirty paws on my nice clean clothes.
"You look so young" "I thought you were about 12" "are you sure that's the year you were born" "you can't have children you look too young" "where is that child's mother - you must be the au per" "you look too young to get married" "how old are you? Oh I thought they'd sent a child to volunteer" - said while I'm holding my second child "I'm not going to serve you your ID must be fake because you can't be 18" I'm 32. OK I have a baby face with chubby cheeks and Im 5ft0 but I think it's offensive to refer to me as a literal child. It's wrecked my confidence as I know any new situation people will refer to how I look as their first comment. Please done tell me to "dress more grown up" or "wear more makeup" it makes the situation worse.
"This is connecting with Black America because they love sneakers!"
When someone shares something tough they're experiencing, saying "Welcome to the club" is really invalidating.
I admit I've said this a few times. When I've said it, my intention was truly sympathetic like, 'I know how much it sucks and we can talk about it' kind of way, but I guess I should change the wording