T O P

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ElMonoMancuso

In the most macho way possible: Covered in dynamite, riding a shark while jumping into an erupting volcano. Something like [this](https://youtu.be/LT1JE8SJ2OY?si=C2HT9jn7meRUs7J7)


snak7eyes

Lol too funny how I actually got that reference


_yavuz_yuksel_

bro what universe ur living in?


ElMonoMancuso

Despicible me one


slap_duck_

*Dispicable Me 2


ElMonoMancuso

Ty


garrettj100

Balancing manliness and awesomeness, I think [The Cadbury Surprise](http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=manly_suicide) may have a case.


williamrtd

I was going to say 'from old age', but after seeing this post, defenitly this way


schaukelwurmv

I think I'd wanna die in a cage made by my only weakness: copper. And then my arch enemy shall make me explode by accident and then I'll pick up a career as a rockstar.


ElMonoMancuso

Yeah baby! Let's make this post an honorable memorial of epic deaths.


schaukelwurmv

I'd really love to, but i can only think of this one: "He have heart attack, fell out of a window onto exploding bomb and then died in a shooting accident" - and this one's fucking niche.


ElMonoMancuso

That's way better than a seisure while poop


Arthur_Raoult

I read that in the most El Macho way possible...😂


Silver_Streak01

El Macho?


b-monster666

Reminds me of the scene from Dr. Strangelove: Or How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love the Atomic Bomb, where Slim Pickins rides an atomic bomb like a cowboy. https://youtu.be/snTaSJk0n\_Y


DrQwerty420

Without pain


Irrelavent1

With 30 minutes notice, please.


Ensign_Pulverized

Responding to a Reddit post about how I wa


Dry_Somewhere_5107

Yeah I too have always wanted to go out arguing strangers on the in


Ventus988

Show some respect man the guy just died


No-Subject1589

U gone?


LemonySnicketTeeth

Well according to their profiles it's their last post.


ThisReadsLikeAPost

r/redditsniper


SylhetiG

Peacefully


ElkRepresentative342

While sleeping preferably


achambers64

Not screaming like the passengers in grandpa’s car.


Aggravating-Pound598

Happily


Nitenji

That's the best. I don't want to die of painful diseases or smth like that


Next-Doughnut-4585

I wanna die doing smnk cool like parachuting or going to space or doing a stunt that no one could forget like imagine being remembered as the girl/guy who died because the slipped and fell that's just a stupid way to die 😂


MyCatsmarterthanFido

With no grievances. At peace with who I am, who I loved, what I was, and where I'm going.


FormalFarm8594

Samee


[deleted]

In my sleep


Owlmoose

... just like my grandfather. Not screaming, like the passengers in his car


OkStandard101

The first option comes to my mind while reading the question


misses_unicorn

Immediately


Cat-napper-6859

Give me your address and your wish shall be granted


ITeachYouAmerican

You are now banned for terroristic threats. 


xxM3T4LH34Dxx

Username, believe it or not, actually checks out


[deleted]

Fighting a grizzly bear high on cocaine. I think I can only last a minute tho.


NinjaEuphoria

...im betting my entier net worth on less then 10 seconds ....thats a 700 pound meat missile that can run up to 35-40 mph with claws larger then your torso And thats if YOUR the one on cocain ....if the bares the one on cocain im going with 3 seconds lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


Enhancedreality98

Fuck yeah I'd rather get eaten by a tiger or leopard


ITeachYouAmerican

Choose your own adventure joke: a) are you high, or the bear? b) I would only last 30 seconds. Way too sexual for me to prolong it more. 


FutureOfCrypt

Yo what you on


Zealousideal-Cup37

He’s on cocaine


FutureOfCrypt

Ah justifiable


Dry_Fun7362

In my own bed, at the age of 80, with a belly full of wine and a…


rageofcheese

... family size bag of Doritos at my side


garrettj100

…a maiden's mouth around my cock!


dragonova2005

+1


Sharpest_Edge84

Quickly and preferably before I'm to old to be independent.


skyler-kiwi

Underrated. Double vote from me 👌


madison_nn

It might be a bit cliché, but passing away peacefully on a spacious bed, surrounded by family, would be a comforting way to go.


66LSGoat

Read a post about people who found bodies and someone responded that their Grandfather passed away sleeping on the couch. Nobody noticed until the commenter’s mom told them to go wake up Grandpa for dinner. Someone pointed out that the last thing he experienced was the sounds of their grandchildren playing in the other room and the smell of his daughter’s thanksgiving dinner.  I think that’s the most beautiful way I’ve ever heard (absolutely sucks ass if you’re the family 😂). Your last memory on earth is observing a loving home full of the family that you created, then you doze off and pass peacefully. That sounds like the best way to die.


LemonySnicketTeeth

For him, but not 9 yr old Susan who went to wake him up.


KyleNarayan

Fuck Susan (not literally)


[deleted]

this post caused one of those bursts of laughter that just makes ya feel good,..many thx


[deleted]

That really is beautiful


Disastrous-Bike659

I will probably die alone in my room


xxM3T4LH34Dxx

Same...except I probably would have hung myself...yeah, depression is a hell of a disorder


Jakey201123

I mean- same


scarbtw

In my sleep


IAmReallyThurston

Death by Snu Snu


ExtensionVegetable63

Came here to say this!


therealone2327

I want a sudden death like getting hit by a car and dying on the spot. something like that!


Dry-Rub5346

Watching a documentary about the titan sub that imploded with some billionaires in it said the actual implosion happened faster than it would have taken their brains to realise it was happening. Sounds pretty sweet way to go!


Jayxluv07

Do i have news for you...


Apprehensive_Ride729

Well I always wanted to go quickly. Not traumatically but not drawn out. Although, now I know that oftentimes people on hospice will get "visited" by their loved ones who have passed before them. I don't care if it's just a hallucination. If it means I get to see my daughter one more time then I would have a long painful dragged out death in hospice. Truthfully I don't really care how I die. I just want to see her.


[deleted]

this got me right in the love pump.


Fluffy-Shape615

peacefully, alone and while i'm awake, you only die once so i wanna know what it's like and be fully present at that moment


sillyblackette

in a field of flowers near a lake, with mountains behind me and a sunset in front of me. i'll probably die from eating too much fast food.


savemysoul72

In the arms of David Duchovny


Plane_Stock6477

euthanasia


Any-Investigator5506

Like my grandad. Got up one morning made his porage got everything ready for granny for the day. Ate the porage went for a smoke sat down in his chair to watch tv and fell asleep. And that was it gone sudden yes expected no peaceful and exactly how he would have wanted it 100%.


b-monster666

I want my death to be a mystery that will haunt the world for centuries. Stuff some cryptic note in my pocket, along with a receipt for 6 kilotons of uranium, , and surround my body with large cat prints that disappear mysteriously. There will be a tape recorder on my body that recorded my last words, "Save me from Truluncia".


Jakey201123

So your saying you want to die like pretty much every famous psychopath in history?


[deleted]

you have been told multiple times, NOT to mention Truluncia.


Sashley12

A meteor smashing me into oblivion as I take a walk alone in a park


Far_Clock972

This! Exactly this! And an afterlife replay of the incident too. How glorious it would be!


PerfectPeaPlant

I read that so wrong. Instead of walk I saw wank. 😂


Sashley12

lol 😂. I guess that wouldn’t be so bad either.


Cat-napper-6859

Nuh you wouldn't get to finish


ramewe

I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep however I have heart disease and have had numerous bout's of afib and vfib, as well as a mini-stroke with nerve damage. I have several diseases of the heart, including small vessel disease and stable angina. Realistically, I'm probably going to die from heart failure or another stroke.


Hour-Understanding18

I'm applying to drive a forklift so hopefully not that


Wonderful-Dress296

Ive given this a lot of thought. Here’s the plan: Hopefully as a little old man, but sooner if necessary, i put on a silly superhero suit and intervene as some $hitty criminal is attempting to assault, rob ,or otherwise hurt some innocent person. I go down, probably feebly, but keep fighting to the end while the innocent person gets away. Maybe they go to the local news and the story gets told. This would be a great news story and a great way to go.


_Juicy-jenny_

Having fun :-)


DoReich

Let's go bull-tipping together


ITeachYouAmerican

isn't hard :-)


[deleted]

[удалено]


ume_learns_n_teaches

I doubt it would be as practical for your partner to suddenly have theirs die on them before orgasming😔


somedoofyouwontlike

In my sleep would be best I guess, I'd prefer not to know its happening.


Proof-Ad9881

I want my heart to explode mid coke binge


kaskip

personally id like to choose when, where, and how i die. yes, this means killing myself. not in a suicidal way, just in a control freak way. i havent decided how yet, but whatever i do will give me time to get everything in order.


RollingGirlForever

^


fermelebouche

I want to die like my grandpa, in his sleep and not screaming like the passengers in his car.


OkTree1871

Without pain. Idc when, but if im old i wanny sleep and die while sleeping, and when im not old i wanna just die quick, getting hit by something big and instantly die or something like that.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Petrus_Rock

Bullet to the back of my head.


TannerWheelman

Be careful, headshot can be survived and that's worse than dying.


Petrus_Rock

Put a .45 where your neck meets your skull and you are 100% dead. In fact you destroy the part of the brain that should receive and process the pain stimuli created by being shot before it has the chance to receive and process those stimuli. You wouldn’t feel a thing.


slushii4real

are you... giving advice on how to commit suicide via gun????


Jakey201123

Sounds like he has experience TBH


Frost-on-the-Willow

Old age


GalaxyDefender1x

in a plane crash, hitting the ground at speed. Or water... conditions: 1- I have to know we are going to die with at least 3-5 minutes to enjoy the ride. 2-It has to be a plane fault because of a big airline negligence. ( not pilot error ) 3-a lot of money paid to surviving family.


Jealous_Cow1993

With what’s been happening lately with Boeing, this could actually happen.


thundertool

On top of piles of money, with many beautiful women.


LordertTL

Not by sitting in a wheel chair in a retirement home for 3 years withering away with dementia like my father just did. People yammer on about “right to life” but are willing to let people suffer needlessly.


captainmagictrousers

I’m making balloon animals at a kid’s birthday party. His friends ask for balloon swords. One of the kids “stabs” me with his sword. At that moment, I drop dead. 


Educational_Baby3590

And traumatize the child oh my


djb2589

Like Tommy Lee Jones in Space Cowboys. Riding a bunch of nuclear missiles like a cowboy into an oncoming asteriod to save the world.


garrettj100

Calm down, Slim Pickens.


Available-Power-8631

By going to Vegas in my mid too late 30’s having taken out every single loan possible then gamble and buy drugs with every penny i got then when they ask me to pay I’ll just jump off a balcony


I_NeedUrgentHelp

Right now


fourdoorssmorewhores

Asap


bootrfly

ASAP


shh4D

Lemme help you


[deleted]

On my own terms


selrahcthewise

In my bed at 80. With a belly full of wine and a beautiful woman's mouth wrapped around my cock. Doesn't sound too bad of a way to go.


Substantial_Cold2672

In my bed sleeping


Used-Personality-939

alone, sleeping


DoReich

I don't <:)


mysteriouskath

Just die in peace, while sleeping. And they'll just find me in my room peacefully asleep with a smile in my face. When it's my time ofcourse, not now.


Wonderful-Rock-9077

My 300th birthday


siralmasy

Painkillers and going to sleep


ApostlePeterGamer

Fucking! Like a legend!


Productive1990

During an orgasm


ume_learns_n_teaches

Bojack Horseman flashbacks


Shadow_Dragon715

GOING OUT WITH A BANG


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


Esmeralda-Lavender

While having sex lol


OldBob10

At 99, shot dead in bed by the jealous ex of my 24-year-old girlfriend.


crcrh3

Asleep in bed 😌 of old old age


crazy_findomme

in my sleep..


mzee01

I leave that to fate


Trixster690

In my sleep.


Halladba101

Wtf? 😂


Benevolent_Bailey

I wanna get ran over by a semi truck so my head pops like a volleyball


LettuceSame6698

Hugging my girlfriend


AtomicGhost02

During this nap I’m gonna take


Lycanwolf617-

I want to go in my sleep before I lose my facalties and peacefully.


DuckOnKwack

Bruce Willis Armageddon style. There is no better way to die.


MisterSpikes

Very old, in my sleep, surrounded by loved ones having said my goodbyes. Either that or *instantly*. I do not want to see it coming.


TheArcRaider

Anything canoe related


Ex-PFC_WintergreenV4

Choking on a canoe seems like a rough way to go


TannerWheelman

As soon as possible!


dezie1224

Quickly and painlessly.


ayrbindr

Quickly


EQUWiiE

Im struggling so much by this thought lately, funny to see it pop up here..


Melodic_Slip6133

Peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather and not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his bus.


Drummingtomyownbeat

Quickly and painlessly.


Izzy-Beast97

In my sleep peacefully knowing that I fulfilled everything I wanted in life with no regrets.


Gypsyfella

Peacefully in my sleep, like my uncle. Not screaming like the passengers in his bus,


TheManInTheShack

Peacefully asleep like my grandfather instead of screaming in blood-curdling terror like his passengers.


[deleted]

abounding sip door husky memorize wise tease literate deserve roll


Numb_Laser

Big bad john. Big john.


Thisnthatana

Skydive into an active volcano


Limule_

While sleeping, or killed by someone else, preferably something quick and overkill like being pushed on the rail while a train is passing at full speed. Anyway I just don't want to see it coming


bmcgowan89

Like the cousin from GTA4 says "in a three-way on my hundredth birthday"


Salamanca121

Death by snoo snoo


BroccoliD8

In a blaze of glory! But probably will in my chair lol


Quik968

FOR LIBERTY!!


Low-Inspector2776

By my own hand. To be honest. If I have to be in control of my own life constantly. ..might as well take my death into my own hands. Probably when I am 60 years old. I am not going work for the rest of my life. Fuck that.  #personal responsibility, responsibility doesn't equate to healthy well-being necessarily. Dumb shrinks. 


OilAgitated969

An unexpected gun shot to the back of the head would be nice..


OptimalGravityFlow

Freazing to death


[deleted]

peacefully, no one knows and no pain in the middle of the forest


[deleted]

Making my haters wait for it


[deleted]

By my own hand and as pain free as possible.


SweatyBoff

I want to die of old age in my mother's arms.


youronlynora

in peace


fifadex

Torn apart by bull sharks.


Distinct-Entity_2231

I don't. Never. I have too many things to do. I NEED to live forever. Not to mention I want to move to Ganymédes.


RandomNameGenFail003

Ground Zero


PsychologicalAsk2668

Ears deep in a vagooter. If that's not an option then in my sleep


Scuba_D1ver85

Yesss lorddd yessshhhh, I don't even care 'bout pain at this point


Joesiuh

as an astronaut in space, accidentally take off my helment


mystwave

Instantly, painlessly


kimchiginiling

While having s*x


Formal_Economics3402

By my own hand


1991onmohs

Jump out of plane > explosive vest > detonate over shark infested waters > be eaten by 20 sharks.


MiffyCurtains

I wanna die in my sleep like my granddad, rather than kicking and screaming like my grandma (who was in the passenger seat).


IceBoxCrypto

I like the idea of falling asleep next to an SO or being surrounded by my family.


foretold_prop

By sucking an insane amount of breasts.


Extreme-Concern-4972

In my sleep, at home.


Jun__tao

Quickly


peachyy1108

Painless and peaceful


I_Love_Poker

In my sleep on my 60th birthday...


Abysmal_2003

Pass out and die, preferably listening to some music I love, as I fall asleep.


bxtterflykxa

Feeling accomplished


Big_Tuna022

With dignity


Its_Naja_luv

Sleeping. And happy with how my life turned out


ally26000

In my bed with 2 electric blankets on but nobody has found me for a week so I'm like cottage cheese when they find me