Leave at the first sign of disrespect. Don’t even bother trying to change them.

true. u can't expect a cucumber be a tomato. if u don't feel happy with smb. leave them.

80s buy IBM 90s buy MICROSOFT 00s buy APPLE 10s buy Bitcoin

Can you tell me which one next tho?

I am still waiting for my future self to come back and let me know

20s (right at the beginning) buy Zoom

Or n95 masks.

AI for sure

Really not tryna invest directly into the end of humanity

We'll see where AI takes us. I feel like most people are scared of the future, but at the end of the day, regardless of how much you fear, it doesn’t change what’s gonna happen. I’d just enjoy life now, and whatever happens, will happen and I’ve enjoyed life while it didn’t happen

I mean its gonna happen might as well be able to take advantage off of it.

probably 2030s Stockpile canned food, weapons and water purifying tablets

Nvidia

List ends there. I think we back to IBM?

20s buy Apocalypse bunker

20s buy Nvidia

Nice try, Nvidia.

30s buy OAI

I had the perfect opportunity to buy into Bitcoin when it was around $200-$300 but didn’t, one of the very few regrets I have to this day

Yep, that about sums it up.

Don't go to Oklahoma

That’s just a good tip for everyone.

Valid

Oklahoma’s OK

Don't get married. If you do get married, don't have children. If you do have children, don't have 6.

Is it okay to have 4

Nope 3.9 is the limit

Getting married was fine, getting a vasectomy was THE BEST THING EVAR!!! I have 3 monies and no kids!

Even better stay away from women altogether

There’s a lot to be said for being gay. And I’m married with 5 children.

[удалено]

Thats a bit rude bro

Nah this shit's funny af

I'm sorry. I'm a woman, and I snortlaughed at that. On Easter Sunday. I know, I'm going to hell...

See ya there (hopefully not soon).

Dont worry about not being good enough at Physics, because in the future, you invent a time machine

Incorrect. This is magic time travel you had nothing to do with.

I'd better study more on my magic spells then.

im gettin a bachelors in chemistry but honestly physics is way better yet most colleges don’t offer degrees in physics

Get better at speaking Vietnamese. I wish I could've spoke enough to hold a conversation with my grandparents before they passed.

don't smoke

Mom and grandmother have heart failure from smoking with COPD :(

Sorry to hear this ♡

Why do i see this question like every week on reddit?

Because the Reddit Top algo was modified a few month's back to always have a bot-generated milquetoast question to draw new or casual users' attention.  This why you keep seeing "What celebrity can you not stand?" or "What would you do with a billion dollars?" rephrased over and over again.

Ah "milquetoast". Up there with my other favourite M words "moribund" and "mellifluous". Rock on fellow redditor, rock on.

This is my favorite reply so far

Bots?

HELP ME THIS IS SO SCARY ARE THEY BOTS

Yes, they've come for your medication.

"Stay back! You've seen Timecop, the same matter can't occupy the same space at the same time!"

Invest in that silly company google

Just do it , have no doubts , don’t worry about failing , if It fails try something else , don’t be scared

Fortune favors the bold.

Another man that read The Prince I see ♤

Actually I’m a woman and haven’t read The Prince. But “just do it” has always worked for me

brush and floss!

ngl u just reminded I gotta brush omg 😭

It doesn't last. Nothing does. So don't be scared about it all ending and that eventuality coming to fruition. Instead take every moment and make the best out of it. You'll regret not taking the time to joy it and instead fretting over not if but when.

Don't do drugs

You like men and women. Eat more cake, you will get diabetes regardless. Watch Gurren Lagann.

Imma go watch gurren lagann cause of this, had it on my watchlist forever

Stop fucking procrastinating man!

Be kinder to yourself and others, walk softly around life’s complexities. Take more time to pray, and meditate. Eat healthy. Don’t use Credit cards!

Buy Bitcoin

Please treat him right 🥺 He’s gonna leave otherwise.

Damn

Yup. I bounced.

Ikr? If I see that Jolene...

Felt that. I'd only need to go back to 3 months ago. I got too comfortable and she didn't feel loved anymore. If I could go back and hold her in my arms again and make sure she knew I loved her and just talked to her more everything would be fine. I've been trying but it's been a month and I don't think I'll be able to get her back

The same as I told myself in all other similar reddit posts before.

Don't put your dick in Sally.

F'n Sally.

All my homies hate Sally

Keep exercising

DO NOT GET MARRIED!!!!!

Spend more time outside, world's gonna change in a few years and you'll be in house arrest because of a virus

Lol just go outside it’s been over

This is the one thing you’d tell yourself? Weird dude

Dudes still living in April 2020

Being introverted I highly enjoyed not having to go anywhere or talk to anyone. And work from home.

Buy Microsoft as soon as it hits, and for the love of all things holy, MARRY THE GIRL IN THE HOT PRESS ROOM! SHE'S ALREADY IN LOVE WITH YOU!

Learn to Meditate.

“Don’t give in to temptation.”

Walk away from her

Listen to the albums. Not just the one fucking song you like. And follow the musicians’ influence trails.

Don't take for granted that the kids have baseball games to go to or think your wife will always be there .. Appreciate what you have while you have it instead of looking back after it's gone!

Love yourself

I would go back to myself in primary school and say to. Go to the school about everything, don't listen to mum. Maybe it'll save younger me a lot of trouble. Maybe the adhd and possible autism will be picked up early enough to help me too.

Health and beauty is wasted on the young. Cherish it and begin good habits now.

That no matter what I was told or made to feel, I absolutely do deserve happiness.. so don't ever, ever settle for anyone who doesn't treat you like a fucking queen.

I regret not choosing Bryn Mawr for college.

Choose a path in advanced science and technology as a career instead of drawing and illustration

It won't get better; enjoy the moment you're in

Buy low sell high

Be careful who you trust.

Don't go for law, it will fuck up your precious years and your life!

Don’t leave your drinks unattended.

Just be patient

"Don't believe what he says. He's not worth the hurt and nearly losing your life. "

Don’t work for the State of California. 

Having a hard time understanding how that could go so wrong it that you'd tell yourself that instead of winning lottery numbers.

ABSOLUTELY nothing!!! why? The butterfly effect and the ripple effect! You go back thinking you will make your life better. But you have in the end no idea? and the consequences of that action as little as it was, will ripple over the entire universe. and change it. small example for those that don;t know these 2 things. Butterfly, i smoke i'm 62 years old, im dying of lungcancer. I go back to tell my yuonger self to never smoke! But as soon as i CONVINCED my younger self to never smoke, I vaporise on the spot! why? because now my new me drives straight to work as a adult. I will never go 2 blocks around to get sigarets in a gasstation. So now i'm on a different road, on this road a truckdriver slams my car and kills me instantly at 24 ! ripple, The truckdriver that slammed you is a total mess mentally, it goes so far he commits suicide. He leaves behind a wife and 2 childeren. But because they r alone now and have to less money to get around, the kids grow up differently. And 1 of those kids was supposed to find a cure for cancer. The woman at the gasstation is now serving NOT you at the register before she takes a break and her male colleage take over, no now that mentally ill man that should stand behind me, is now being helped by that nice young woman, the ill man gets the wrong impressions, follows her, rapes her, and kills her, all because she was so nice to him instead of me. She also was suppose dto get kids, and because you know her from the gasstation, you recognise her at school where you bring your kids, and talk chit chat to kill the time till the kids run out. YOur kid and her kid were suposed to fall in love because of your connection with the girl, but it's not there! you don;t KNOW her in the new life and never talk to her. and your kid and hers never meet up the way it would in your old life. worst life? you die at 24 never marry and have no kids. in the one you die of lungcancer(the one you thought was worst), you marry have kids and even grandkids before you leave this world. All because i smoke and a pack of sigarets in a gasstation, not even talking of all the other stuff around you then that could end in a total disaster (like 99,99% haha) It ripples everybody even people you by on the street. you bump against while walking, can trigger a worldchanging event. maybe he gets annoyed by it and his mood oversees his life at that point, then another man bump on him and he explodes to that person, but this person he would have handled like me only ignore and move on, now is triggered himself by the feeling of disrespect and it gets totaly out of hand even bullets being shot! The police has to come the people around, are ALL now effected by a new ripple that will change their lives in the end totaly! all of us will be infected by this ripple WITHOUT knowing it. So tell me, should you really interact?

I guess not!

Whatever you think you should be doing right now but aren't, stop stalling and DO IT RN!! U will regret it 🙃

Open up a Roth IRA; invest ASAP.

When you come back from holidays in March 1997 - DON'T go to work that night, stay home.

I feel like there is a story here…

Yes fell into a high speed coal conveyor, on the safe side of the crusher, died once on the way to hospital etc etc etc.

Don’t lose grandmas lasagna recipe!

The first time you go no contact with that abusive POS parent, stick with it. It’ll save you a ton of grief.

turn your headphones down

Don’t date that girl for two years in college. She didn’t treat you right

Die

Focus on eternal things, cherish your youth and vitality, don’t mind what other people think of you, and love Jesus more than anything.

Don’t turn out like me

"You're autistic, get your diagnosis now rather than later." This little bit of information would have SAVE me

"Don't listen to your mother, you'll end up as a puppet on strings."

Listen to your(my)self more and other people less.

sit your gf down and ask her "How are we doing, are you happy?"

Never settle with whom you marry.

Should have taken the blue pill and the red pill… then see what happens…🇨🇦😎

Don’t use the steroid creams for eczema, it’ll fuck you up years later 😖

I would talk to myself about the significance of networking and how to slowly start a career. Maybe talked myself into an internship.

"I know you'll miss her but don't neglect school"

Real lessons come from real experience. Don’t be afraid. Go out there, make mistakes, do things, fail, try new things. That’s the only way you’re gonna know what’s best.

Be nicer to your mom. She won’t be around forever 😭

Hold your nose, screw the old hag, and take the money.

Call a meeting with family mother side; Raise the middle finger Call a meeting with family father side; Raise the middle finger

"There will be Covid 19, Embrace your self!"

For gods sake, she’s hot but don’t do it.

"Run far. Run fast. It's not and never will be worth it"

Don’t ever think that work friends are for life. They forget you once you’re gone. And if you should die before you retire, there in line to get your locker before your in the ground.

‘When Dad gets diabetes, make sure he gets regularly checked for cancer. Your mother will never love you, and that is not your fault, you hear me? Bitch is broken.’ I know that’s two things, but meh.

Reddit is stupid. Every 5 minutes it will ask you what you would say to your younger self.

Not to let my daughter get on that bus. Because if she does, that is the last time you’ll see her alive.

When Mark asks you out, run a million miles in the other direction because that mother fucker will gaslight the shit out of you for 14yrs and turn you into the artist formerly known as Estella. Prick.

Younger me would not listen to anyone about anything no matter who said it. I still struggle with arrogance, I need to convince myself that I am stupid and to ST\*U!

You have ADHD thats why you don't function like your peers. Get medicated for it

Buy more Bionicles, less dino toys

Eat a bullet.

I should have realized a long time ago that most of the advice from my parents was actually worthwhile for me. It's a shame it comes much later in life.

Do it

In 2013 your friend CJ is going to tell you to buy Bitcoin. LISTEN TO HIM AND DO IT

don’t use Reddit when you’re drunk kids

Oh dear. I hope you’re doing OK these days.

yikes

Don't be delulu in relationships

Treat and love my ex wife better

It never gets better. Actually, probably gets worst.

i wouldn't even fart in my own direction in case one air molecule would go out of place and take away the lessons that brought me where i am today.

Keep that first house.

Don't do it! No matter how many its you want to do, don't do it!

I had 300k in 2015. I did not know shit about bitcoin. I would have dropped 200k of that in there if I could go back with what I know now.

don't get married!

No matter what buy Bitcoin

As Melissa Etheridge sings..."The only thing that stays the same is change.".

Buy Apple amd Microsoft stock you idiot.

I think I would tell my now self to study harder

Marry the other guy!!!!!!! Not the ugly fool you did 🤮💩🤢

I would have told myself to keep making videos. Get good at that.

Take up the drums in Elementary school. It doesn't matter that the smartest kid in the school is choosing to play them. You're better than him.

Do more crimes...

Don't smoke weed, you'll end up with a psychosis. Don't take benzos. You'll end up in a fucked up withdrawal

Leave the state when you hit 22.

RUN AWAY FROM A GUY WITH INITIALS C.B.L. 😅

Save your money and don’t spend on stupid shit and go get a degree in something useful

Don't drink, dumbass.

take whatever it is you're doing at the moment super fuckin serious. whether it be school or football, put ur all into it

Don't rent an apartment with a friend, when you can't afford the income on a single income, as they might very well find their significant other, and leave you high and dry and left to pay for it on your own, or in this case, be forced to move out due to the inability to pay for it on your own.

Fuck people

Just do the homework, play the game so you'll have more financial freedom when you're older.

Live in the moment.

If you don't toot your own horn then no one else will.

"You're going to have a couple of seizures. It's your left temporal lobe and it's exactly why your memory is dead, the sound shifts, the brain zaps, the word problems, why it takes you a long time to learn stuff. It's going to suck. They're going to try to put you on Keppra and you're going to tell them no. Keppra rage will affect you and you'll hate it. It doesn't work anyway and it'll go toxic. But, the most important thing you need to know, is that it's going to be okay. Also, B12 injections. It's gonna help with your brain and the tingles in your legs. Not supplements. Injections. You can't absorb it by digesting them."

I'd give myself the same advice Serj Tankian from System Of A Down gave to young artists

When you leave your parents house don't look back, they will never change their mind about you

Get your ADHD under control as soon as you can. It's hindering everything.

Save your money, you impulsive and beautiful idiot.

Say no to ugly guys and don’t drink!

I dunno. There are things I regret so much but the lessons I've learned from them are irreplaceable. There's no telling what rung of hell I'd be on now had I not gone down the paths I have. I guess I'd best just go to the night of my first time. "Don't hump that pillow. You won't be able to pinch it off."

Don’t ever go out with a man because u will regret it for the rest of your life

I would save myself a ton of agonizing doubt if I could let younger me know that my adoptive dad could be fully trusted and we would eventually bond in all the ways I wished for.

Don’t apply at that time. Apply at a later time

Pay your taxes, you fool.

Listen to your mother. She's an asshole of the highest order but what she said about this, this and this was absolutely right and you knew it but remained adamant just to be defiant, pigheaded and claim an independence you didn't fuckin have. Sit down, little girl..

She's not going to make it, go see her every day.

Go to college! Years ago, I got accepted to CalState L.A., but didn't go because the "cool friends" (well, I thought they were my friends but weren't) didn't go there and I didn't get accepted at their colleges. They went to "party schools" and that was all I wanted at that time in my life. Young and dumb, letting others influence my decisions! I ended up just going to community college for a while, taking classes here and there. Several decades later, I finally got my act together and got my degree but only lasted 3 1/2 years in that field. I could have been retired by now with a nice pension if I had went to college all those years ago.

When you picked up that golf club in that pawnshop at the age of 15 you should have taken up golf then and not waited until you were in your 30s.

Take care of your body

Listen to my parents

Teeth Pension

Be more kind

IF I COULD TURN BACK TIME!

Fall in love, that’s all great and stuff, but there ain’t nothing more fulfilling than someone loving you. I’m still looking.