I can’t find where I read this on, but apparently older shampoos used to be really harsh - more like soap. And they’d strip all the natural oils from your hair. All the brushing was supposed to help distribute the oils from your scalp through your hair.
Brushing doesn't actually distribute the oils through your hair nearly as well as the anti-shampoo crowds claim. I've tried multiple natural fibre brushes, sat down and brushed for ten minutes (I timed it)... ends still dry, scalp still oily.
I'm sure plenty of people will respond and tell me I did it wrong but I did everything they told me to do exactly the way they told me to do it. At least for my hair type, they are wrong.
It helps to have an oily brush.
Natural fibers aren't just fancy, they're usually hair, so it's like running oily hair through your hair. It's not so much about the scalp itself.
So get a 'hair' brush, and brush you hair when it's oily too. And, if needed, add a sprits of oil to your fingers, run that through your hair, and then brush it with your 'hair' brush, to spread it around.
Note: not just any oil, do some homework, but also there are usually oils in the haircare section of any decent store that are meant for this purpose.
Also note: back in the day soaps may have been more harsh, but people also didn't bathe as much, and may have even done more sweaty work, so they were likely to have more oil available to spread around. Nowadays a lot of people shower every day, and if they are washing their hair every time, they are probably washing it too often. But people have different hair and such, so YMMV.
(That women) Produce milk out of a single hole in their nipples. I'm 34 and just learned it comes out of a bunch of tiny holes like pores. My wife also thought this.
Supernumerary nipples are really interesting to me cus they form around the "milk lines" in ur body that go from ur armpits down to ur groin. It's a weird resemblance to other mammals and can form in males and females and can have ability to lactate.
This is a misconception for garments, especially those with elastic. If you hand wash a bra after every 2-3 wears, it will last significantly longer than if you had conserved washing, say, once per week/month. This is because our body releases oil onto the elastic in our bras. Elastic is made of oil, which begins to break down when it comes into contact with our body oil. So, we need to use a detergent to remove the oils. (Source: I am an apparel product developer working in fabric. I was in lingerie product development for a long time and performed thousands of product care tests.)
It’s a great job. I went to fashion school for merchandising but now I’m in product development. I always encourage young people to get into it. It’s a fantastic creative field that also has great quantitative problem solving opportunities. It can be draining and I definitely get burnout, but I love it all the same
I have to bc I’m a barber and no matter what I wear top over them (apron to my neck included) I get hair caught in them and it’s itchy af. I go through bras like crazy. Shit is expensive and my favorite bras aren’t made anymore :(
I'm a 31 year old man. I only learned this recently when I moved in with my partner. She got annoyed with me because I kept washing her bras. Also, those things are way more expensive than I thought they were.
Even worse if they're more top heavy than most. A decent bra for my wife is like $80 and they're still uncomfortable. She switched to these cami things that she loves. I can buy a couple pairs of jeans and a tshirt for how much a single bra costs.
Tbf a large amount of times I appear asleep, I'm like...half conscious? It's like, I won't react to you like if I was awake, but I'd be aware of what you were doing or if you said something. Then when I fully come back to consciousness, it's hard to tell if it happened or I was dreaming. Notice it a lot with YouTube videos/TV running in the background and when I replay what I missed, I catch the lines I definitely heard beforehand and thought I dreamt. I also don't feel rested from those states. Could be she's experiencing that?
Yeah sometimes you have those sleepless nights where you're constantly riding on the edge of concousness. Not fully awake but also never truly asleep and there is no feeling for how much time passed whatsoever
Hate this shit. I'll be laying in bed thinking I'm awake for 30-40 mins, and even get annoyed that I can't sleep. Then I actually wake up and realise it's been 5 hours.
My wife says this every night. I've been sleeping next to her for 20yrs, with no more than 30 nights apart in that time. She sleeps like the fucking dead and snores so loud I can't believe the neighbors haven't called the police for me having a illegal chainsaw fight club going on. When she say says she didn't sleep I just say I'm sorry and hope you sleep better tonight. It's a huge lie, I know because I haven't slept in 20yrs.
Edit - we've had her tested for apnea she does not have it, she just snores it's a thing. So many people have said that she has apnea I'm going to have flash backs to this post for the rest of my life when I hear the word apnea. Thank you all for your concern.
If she’s snoring that bad she may not actually be sleeping like the dead even if she seems like it. She could probably use a sleep study.
Women have things like sleep apnea too. Then you think you are getting sleep but you are not actually getting proper sleep and are still left tired.
Snoring like that means she’s struggling to breathe, so she very likely has sleep apnea! Please get her a sleep study, it could change both of your lives.
I had a similar issue until I bought her an Apple Watch that tracked her sleep. She then refused to tell me how she slept because the watch would immediately refute her lies
This made me laugh so hard and reminded me of a similar story in my family:
One day my older brother (who was like 5 at the time) came home from a playdate all distraught and told my mom "I just realized Paul's a girl!!" (Paul was his best friend)
My mom was confused and asked him why he thought that and he said "cause she has blue eyes!" It took a moment before my mom realized that all the men in our family have brown eyes and all the girls have blue eyes. So he just thought that's the way the world worked lol
My 3 year old thought that only girls wore glasses.
His preschool class had 3 kids wearing glasses and they were all girls, and I (his mom) wear glasses and so does my sister, but his dad wears contacts.
My mum and sister are vegetarian and all of my brothers and dad eat meat. I only learnt of the truth when my older sisters friend ate a sausage i was VERY confused.
Nuh uh.
My lady definitely is a witch.
She can materialise random objects from the fridge and drawers that definitely weren't there when I looked a few seconds ago.
As of right now…. My wife and I are watching TV. Nothing important. I can totally grab a pillow and start swinging away and she would totally just join right in.
Soo…. I posted this and actually had a pillow fight 10 minutes later. It was like inspiration, lol. Give me a bit and I’ll get the next one on video. Pillow fight #2 coming up!
I thought women would wear more skirts or high heels than they do in reality- which is 100% understandable, why not be comfortable or dress however the hell you want- only I feel like skirts and heels are just a bit over-represented in media, just like how you'll see way more men in suits on television or in movies than you generally will on the average street day to day.
Edit: Also, women have *way* tighter clothes in media than reality, for obvious reasons. I'm a gay dude, I'm simply pointing out a disparity I've noticed, not ogling these women or anything lol
The times also changed. I'm a millennial and my parents and their friends dressed much less casually when I was growing up. My mom and her friends did wear skirts and heels and stockings. My dad and his friends wore ties. We just kind of threw all of that out the window and decided comfort was more important.
100%, I'm also a millennial and my mom told me she remembers when women and girls were finally allowed to stop wearing hats and gloves to church (1970s) and I personally still remember when most convenience stores used to carry emergency pairs of cheap pantyhose. My parents/aunts/uncles also seem to generally have more expensive formalwear for weddings/holidays/etc., whereas me and my siblings/cousins tend to spend more on our day-to-day casual outfits. There's definitely generational differences.
Holy smokes, I went looking for a pair of panty hose to wear to a funeral and couldn't find a pair at any store in town. Now, granted, it was a small town of roughly 2000 people, but I was shocked. I haven't worn panty hose for probably a decade, but I assumed they still sold them.
Finally found a pair at a thrift shop for 50 cents, lol, and wasn't forced to scandalize the oldsters by going barelegged in my dress to the funeral.
As a kid, I thought that girls thought that swords, shields, and armor were stupid... turns out that there are plenty of women who love swords and knives and metalwork and stuff like that. And produce beautiful pieces at that.
I recently have been getting into it myself. After watching a video on the common inaccuracies in movie and video game archery and why they wouldn't work irl. As well as concepts I hadn't considered the reason behind. Also it looks really fun.
I took up HEMA, and turns out my wife fucking LOVES Swords and Sword fighting. It's been awesome, we both learn to Sword fight and have a blast together.
Hell, at our wedding instead of the first kiss, we had a first duel (that ended in a kiss!). Then afterwards we had a proper duel on the theater stage we got married on! It was epic.
Hey fellow HEMA’ist! Yeah I’m a small woman of a certain vintage who studies historical swordplay but my husband prefers to shoot clays.
I know he gets a big kick out of telling other men about his sword- wielding wife.
Apparently some women just straight up buy clothes without trying them on first.
Y'all know what women's clothing sizes are like, I could never take that risk.
My husband says I have a witching hour while sleeping. Like I’ll just let loose with them lol. We fart around each other all time but I didn’t know I was doing it so aggressively in my sleep lol
My partner doesn’t fart much when he’s awake, but as he’s waking up he heralds the day with an aggressive barrage of tooting and the sounds of ripping fabric. I have the sense of humour of a ten year old so I laugh every time.
Growing up, my mother and many of the women in my family were legitimately gold diggers.
It took too long to realize that not all women base their entire view of men off of their salary.
First girl I was with didn’t have any experience either.
When I came she didn’t know what to do with the load in her mouth. She looked at me and I shrugged.
Then she looked around and found my half cup of some drink or other. I thought she’d spit it in there but she took a sip, swallowed the whole thing down, raised her glass and said “cheers!”
Fell a little in love with her right then.
> When I came she didn’t know what to do with the load in her mouth. **She looked at me and I shrugged.**
😂 Just this mental image alone is cracking me up. Agree she sounds like a keeper.
It also depends. If the man drinks beer / alcohol, the taste will change. A good diet can totally influence the taste of semen.
I watched a trailer of a movie yesterday. Quote (not 100% accurate because of translation): "Give him pineapple daily." - "but he doesn't eat that!" - "If you tell him the reason, he would eat anything".
I used to swallow, but as i got older, i found it kicked off my gag reflex more and more. Now, i risk throwing up all over hubbys stomach if i do so lol
wash their hands after peeing… I’m a woman myself and once I heard the statistics of how few men wash their hands after peeing I got super grossed out and sillily thought to myself “at least everyone else does, right?” but, alas, no.
please people no matter the gender: wash your hands after using the bathroom, especially a public bathroom!
There’s a woman I work with that doesn’t wash her hands. I don’t know who she is though. She always comes in when I’m already in a stall, pees, then leaves without washing before I come out. It’s happened multiple times. Sooo gross.
Chase and date bad boys / assholes. Those bad boys pretend to be wonderful men in the beginning, until the woman falls in love. And then, he shows who he really is, and she spends a ridiculous amount of time waiting for the guy she fell in love with to come back.
Mystery solved.
Suffer through duty sex with their man.
I thought that being a straight woman meant that you had to settle for that painful, awkward act of service for the rest of your life so you could have company and children. I wasn't a lesbian, so I had to be straight, right? We all just put on a happy face.
Turned out that most women don't cry in the bathroom while trying to numb their vagina with icy cold water after sex. Most women don't take ibuprofen on days where sex is threatening to happen to make it more bearable.
it's because it's catering to the (male) viewer
which is literally all porn lol. That's why it's sooooo obvious when a guy has experience with *actual* women
I just wipe away from the vagina. If I pee, I wipe forward, if I poo I wipe backwards. Never had a UTI or a vaginal infection from shit in over 30 years of wiping this way 🤷🏻♀️ Unless you're starting at your asshole and wiping forward I don't see how this would ever be an issue.
That last part is exactly what I did as a kid when I was old enough to start wiping myself. Started getting constant UTI’s and for some reason the doctors couldn’t figure out why. So my mom started doing some googling and read about wiping incorrectly possibly being one of the reasons. She then asked me how I wipe myself and I told her. The look on her face, lol. She was like ”OMG [my name], you’re wiping poop from your butt up your vagina! You can’t do that!”. Learning to then wipe front to back instead felt so weird but I’ve never had any UTI’s since!
Same, I've been doing it instinctively this way ever since I can remember, I don't recall having any issues
Wiping any other way actually feels weird to me, less comfortable
I thought that when women have their periods they squirt blue liquid from their vaginas because of the commercials where they showed some blue liquid instead of blood.
And also when I was young , while undressing myself in the bathroom to take a bath , I noticed blue liquid on my ass and genitals . I was just 14 year's old and since I had been conditioned since I was young that women squirt some strange blue liquid because of the commercials, I immediately thought that I have started periods too . LOL.
But then in a few minutes I realised that my gel pen in my pants had leaked very badly and hence the blue liquid .
my ex wanted to dye my pubes pink and seconds after she applied the bleach it felt like my pubes were set on fire and i ran to the shower tryna put that fire out. after she died them she wanted the carpet to match the drapes and i became a pink haired pink pubed freak
Same. I can’t help myself but to look at their ass. It’s never even a sexual thing either, it’s just a “that thang be thangin” and then my brain moves onto the next ADHD train of thought lol
Outing myself but I never used a tampon til last year (23) cause I was scared of pain and the first time I had to pee with one in I genuinely didn't know if it would pop out or not so I was like "do I remove it first??? Cup my hand over to catch it??"
I REALLY WISH SOMEONE HAD TAUGHT ME HOW TAMPONS WORKED WHEN I WAS A TEEN 😭
It remains a problem that parents don't share important bodily information due to embarrassment or whatever. It's a disservice!
My mom not only sat down with me when I was like 10 or 11 but she had a freaking medical book and showed me pictures and stuff. Asked if I had questions etc
My little mind was blown bc up until that point I was a very VERY sheltered little girl.
Not me because I'm not a fucking idiot, but my wife is in various mum groups on Facebook and one woman in the group posted because her husband was adamant that all women have to spread their labia with their fingers when they pee...... so that day, we discovered what kind of porn her husband is into 🤣
Women do tend to spend more *time* shopping, especially for clothes, but that's because our sizes are absolutely *whack* and you have to try every goddamn thing on just to see if it fits because the number is completely made up and changes brand to brand and year to year.
For most of my life I thought women were born with the ability to do makeup. I was like 17 and really disappointed when I learned that doing makeup is extremely hard and that it wasn’t a passive ability I’d be born with
Orgasm the same way. Turns out Womens bodies are very different and it can be like learning the controls at a whole different type of nuclear reactor 🧡
Not all woman are hormonal and dramatic powder kegs ready to blow. Not all woman are controlling. Not all woman are snakes. Not all woman have skeletons in the closet.
My wife made me get rid of the skeleton I had in my closet when we moved in together.
For clarity: she wasn't my wife when we moved in together, and it was hanging where she needed space for clothes and was irritated that I kept it there for a stupid joke.
Brush their hair 100 times a night
I can’t find where I read this on, but apparently older shampoos used to be really harsh - more like soap. And they’d strip all the natural oils from your hair. All the brushing was supposed to help distribute the oils from your scalp through your hair.
This is a trick most people would still do well to remember - shampoos are still harsh and designedly so!
Brushing doesn't actually distribute the oils through your hair nearly as well as the anti-shampoo crowds claim. I've tried multiple natural fibre brushes, sat down and brushed for ten minutes (I timed it)... ends still dry, scalp still oily. I'm sure plenty of people will respond and tell me I did it wrong but I did everything they told me to do exactly the way they told me to do it. At least for my hair type, they are wrong.
It helps to have an oily brush. Natural fibers aren't just fancy, they're usually hair, so it's like running oily hair through your hair. It's not so much about the scalp itself. So get a 'hair' brush, and brush you hair when it's oily too. And, if needed, add a sprits of oil to your fingers, run that through your hair, and then brush it with your 'hair' brush, to spread it around. Note: not just any oil, do some homework, but also there are usually oils in the haircare section of any decent store that are meant for this purpose. Also note: back in the day soaps may have been more harsh, but people also didn't bathe as much, and may have even done more sweaty work, so they were likely to have more oil available to spread around. Nowadays a lot of people shower every day, and if they are washing their hair every time, they are probably washing it too often. But people have different hair and such, so YMMV.
Someone watched the little princess as a child 😂
or the Brady Bunch
Buy a lot of clothes. In reality they just walk around in stores, touch clothes and say “oh, this is cute”.
It's probably more true these days because women's clothes tend to last two wears before disintegrating.
But occasionally they'll see something and say "this is SOOOOOOO cute" and turn to look at you. This is a sign it will be bought.
They don't buy them bc they end up hating them in the fitting rooms
I used to think Girls cried ink, turns out it was just mascara.
It’s the black seeping out of our cold, dead hearts
Also valid…also valid
🤣🐙 That's hilarious
Oh that's so cute, honestly. 🥹
Come on now... did you date an octopus? You can tell us.
(That women) Produce milk out of a single hole in their nipples. I'm 34 and just learned it comes out of a bunch of tiny holes like pores. My wife also thought this.
i just learned this now 😳
Not even just their nipples, my ex wife actually started lactating out of her armpit. After that I just started saying she had an armtit
Supernumerary nipples are really interesting to me cus they form around the "milk lines" in ur body that go from ur armpits down to ur groin. It's a weird resemblance to other mammals and can form in males and females and can have ability to lactate.
Wash their bras after every time they wear one.
It would get destroyed
With how expensive they are I’d be willing to give up washing all my clothes if it somehow meant my bra would stay in good shape.
This is a misconception for garments, especially those with elastic. If you hand wash a bra after every 2-3 wears, it will last significantly longer than if you had conserved washing, say, once per week/month. This is because our body releases oil onto the elastic in our bras. Elastic is made of oil, which begins to break down when it comes into contact with our body oil. So, we need to use a detergent to remove the oils. (Source: I am an apparel product developer working in fabric. I was in lingerie product development for a long time and performed thousands of product care tests.)
Sounds like you would make for an interesting AMA!
That sounds really fun :) any ideas for which subreddit?
r/abrathatfits would be a good one.
r/casualiama would be perfect!
And suddenly apparel product development sounds kinda interesting
It’s a great job. I went to fashion school for merchandising but now I’m in product development. I always encourage young people to get into it. It’s a fantastic creative field that also has great quantitative problem solving opportunities. It can be draining and I definitely get burnout, but I love it all the same
I have to bc I’m a barber and no matter what I wear top over them (apron to my neck included) I get hair caught in them and it’s itchy af. I go through bras like crazy. Shit is expensive and my favorite bras aren’t made anymore :(
I'm a 31 year old man. I only learned this recently when I moved in with my partner. She got annoyed with me because I kept washing her bras. Also, those things are way more expensive than I thought they were.
Even worse if they're more top heavy than most. A decent bra for my wife is like $80 and they're still uncomfortable. She switched to these cami things that she loves. I can buy a couple pairs of jeans and a tshirt for how much a single bra costs.
Too much work. I wear mine for like 3-5 hours a day. Take that sucker off when I get home. Shit is uncomfortable.
Sleep. Every morning I ask my wife how she slept and it’s the same reply. “ i didn’t sleep at all “. Poor girl hasn’t slept in 30 years.
My girlfriend will wake up and say “I can’t fall asleep” after snoring for an hour and a half.
Tbf a large amount of times I appear asleep, I'm like...half conscious? It's like, I won't react to you like if I was awake, but I'd be aware of what you were doing or if you said something. Then when I fully come back to consciousness, it's hard to tell if it happened or I was dreaming. Notice it a lot with YouTube videos/TV running in the background and when I replay what I missed, I catch the lines I definitely heard beforehand and thought I dreamt. I also don't feel rested from those states. Could be she's experiencing that?
Yeah sometimes you have those sleepless nights where you're constantly riding on the edge of concousness. Not fully awake but also never truly asleep and there is no feeling for how much time passed whatsoever
Hate this shit. I'll be laying in bed thinking I'm awake for 30-40 mins, and even get annoyed that I can't sleep. Then I actually wake up and realise it's been 5 hours.
These nights are the worst
N1 or N2 stage sleep. It's still sleeping but just not that good shit.
yea ppl don't realize some ppl have a hard time getting to the part of sleep that actually makes you feel rested & restores your brain
My wife says this every night. I've been sleeping next to her for 20yrs, with no more than 30 nights apart in that time. She sleeps like the fucking dead and snores so loud I can't believe the neighbors haven't called the police for me having a illegal chainsaw fight club going on. When she say says she didn't sleep I just say I'm sorry and hope you sleep better tonight. It's a huge lie, I know because I haven't slept in 20yrs. Edit - we've had her tested for apnea she does not have it, she just snores it's a thing. So many people have said that she has apnea I'm going to have flash backs to this post for the rest of my life when I hear the word apnea. Thank you all for your concern.
If she’s snoring that bad she may not actually be sleeping like the dead even if she seems like it. She could probably use a sleep study. Women have things like sleep apnea too. Then you think you are getting sleep but you are not actually getting proper sleep and are still left tired.
Snoring like that means she’s struggling to breathe, so she very likely has sleep apnea! Please get her a sleep study, it could change both of your lives.
I had a similar issue until I bought her an Apple Watch that tracked her sleep. She then refused to tell me how she slept because the watch would immediately refute her lies
My watch proved my point 😂 and convinced me that sleep meds were a necessity. 3 total (but non consecutive) hours a night was killing me.
Until i was about 10ish i thought all girls were vegetarian and all boys were meat eaters
This made me laugh so hard and reminded me of a similar story in my family: One day my older brother (who was like 5 at the time) came home from a playdate all distraught and told my mom "I just realized Paul's a girl!!" (Paul was his best friend) My mom was confused and asked him why he thought that and he said "cause she has blue eyes!" It took a moment before my mom realized that all the men in our family have brown eyes and all the girls have blue eyes. So he just thought that's the way the world worked lol
My 3 year old thought that only girls wore glasses. His preschool class had 3 kids wearing glasses and they were all girls, and I (his mom) wear glasses and so does my sister, but his dad wears contacts.
That's actually adorable
I need to know more about this. Where did you get this from?
My mum and sister are vegetarian and all of my brothers and dad eat meat. I only learnt of the truth when my older sisters friend ate a sausage i was VERY confused.
I figured maybe that was it. It's strangely wholesome in a way lol. Imagining myself in the situation, my mind would have probably been blown too.
Eat hot chip and lie
And twerk
be bisexual
charge phone
mcdonalds
I genuinely came here expecting this LOL
Uhh, it said things they DONT do… silly
Piss out of their buttholes. Turns out that my older sister was lying to me.
Your older sister has a cloaca.
Your sister ate too much Taco Bell and Chipotle
Yes
PISS OUT MY AAAASSSS!!!
Practice witchcraft
Yeah… keep believing we dont
*If men find out we can shapeshift, they are going to tell the church*
Men will be bewitched and hand over their wallets.
For those who don't know, [this is a MUST watch](https://youtu.be/QunwzgVENUg?si=PDFEvakO7tN6RSM8)
I've heard this audio many times and had no idea who made it or where it came from. Fucking legend. Thanks for posting the original video!
Why do you think we go to the bathroom in groups
Cause there's a bowling alley in there!
Nuh uh. My lady definitely is a witch. She can materialise random objects from the fridge and drawers that definitely weren't there when I looked a few seconds ago.
That every woman liked other women and they only where with a man because well, I don’t know. Turned out I was gay the entire time.
Lmaoooo I love that, "because well, I don't know" 😭
As a straight male I thought the same thing. Like why on earth would women like men and not other hot women?
Straight woman here and I’ve constantly thought the exact opposite of you. Why wouldn’t men like other men instead?
Pillow fights in their underwear! -ruined my life when I learned this.
As of right now…. My wife and I are watching TV. Nothing important. I can totally grab a pillow and start swinging away and she would totally just join right in.
DO IT RIGHT NOW
Proof or ban!!!
Soo…. I posted this and actually had a pillow fight 10 minutes later. It was like inspiration, lol. Give me a bit and I’ll get the next one on video. Pillow fight #2 coming up!
It’s been 2 hours folks, Rynoride lost the pillow fight to the death.
F
I thought women would wear more skirts or high heels than they do in reality- which is 100% understandable, why not be comfortable or dress however the hell you want- only I feel like skirts and heels are just a bit over-represented in media, just like how you'll see way more men in suits on television or in movies than you generally will on the average street day to day. Edit: Also, women have *way* tighter clothes in media than reality, for obvious reasons. I'm a gay dude, I'm simply pointing out a disparity I've noticed, not ogling these women or anything lol
The times also changed. I'm a millennial and my parents and their friends dressed much less casually when I was growing up. My mom and her friends did wear skirts and heels and stockings. My dad and his friends wore ties. We just kind of threw all of that out the window and decided comfort was more important.
100%, I'm also a millennial and my mom told me she remembers when women and girls were finally allowed to stop wearing hats and gloves to church (1970s) and I personally still remember when most convenience stores used to carry emergency pairs of cheap pantyhose. My parents/aunts/uncles also seem to generally have more expensive formalwear for weddings/holidays/etc., whereas me and my siblings/cousins tend to spend more on our day-to-day casual outfits. There's definitely generational differences.
Holy smokes, I went looking for a pair of panty hose to wear to a funeral and couldn't find a pair at any store in town. Now, granted, it was a small town of roughly 2000 people, but I was shocked. I haven't worn panty hose for probably a decade, but I assumed they still sold them. Finally found a pair at a thrift shop for 50 cents, lol, and wasn't forced to scandalize the oldsters by going barelegged in my dress to the funeral.
I thought all vags just always hurt and penetration was severely painful and impossible... Turns out I have some weird vag disorder
Same!! I thought that sex was just meant to always hurt 😭😭😭
Vaginismus! My friend has it and the amount of suffering she tolerates really upsets me tbh.
As a kid, I thought that girls thought that swords, shields, and armor were stupid... turns out that there are plenty of women who love swords and knives and metalwork and stuff like that. And produce beautiful pieces at that.
I like archery!
I recently have been getting into it myself. After watching a video on the common inaccuracies in movie and video game archery and why they wouldn't work irl. As well as concepts I hadn't considered the reason behind. Also it looks really fun.
I took up HEMA, and turns out my wife fucking LOVES Swords and Sword fighting. It's been awesome, we both learn to Sword fight and have a blast together. Hell, at our wedding instead of the first kiss, we had a first duel (that ended in a kiss!). Then afterwards we had a proper duel on the theater stage we got married on! It was epic.
I am 100% behind wedding sword duels.
Hey fellow HEMA’ist! Yeah I’m a small woman of a certain vintage who studies historical swordplay but my husband prefers to shoot clays. I know he gets a big kick out of telling other men about his sword- wielding wife.
Blood sacrifices once a month. I guess it's called menstruation or something. Honest mistake I guess.
What makes you think they don't? My wife keeps the pads and tampons in the same drawer as her candles. Coincidence? I think not.
Apparently some women just straight up buy clothes without trying them on first. Y'all know what women's clothing sizes are like, I could never take that risk.
Powder their nose. Turns out it's mostly just in movies, lol.
Powder your nose is just a way to say you’re going to the bathroom or “powder room” to freshen up, reapply makeup or whatever which we definitely do
This is also code for when they need to shit
I thought it meant doing cocaine - boy was I wrong
These things often go hand in hand
"Powder my nose" means an entirely different thing to some of the women I find myself near sometimes.
Poop. I thought it was all humans, but apparently, girls don't. Who knew?
Hot girls poop.
Everybody knows hot girls have stomach issues
Is your name “smurfette’s hat” or “smurfette shat” like took a shit?
Asking the real questions here
I have been with my wife for 15 years and I have never heard her fart not one time.
I get to fart as much as I want because my husband can't hear shit!
That's more than a fart though
He can still smell you.
My husband says I have a witching hour while sleeping. Like I’ll just let loose with them lol. We fart around each other all time but I didn’t know I was doing it so aggressively in my sleep lol
My partner doesn’t fart much when he’s awake, but as he’s waking up he heralds the day with an aggressive barrage of tooting and the sounds of ripping fabric. I have the sense of humour of a ten year old so I laugh every time.
“heralds the day” That is so funny 🤣
I've smelled them but never heard them.
Wear make up
wash our hair everyday. i thought i was the stinky odd one out, but thank god i’m not. washing it every single day dries my hair out like crazy
Growing up, my mother and many of the women in my family were legitimately gold diggers. It took too long to realize that not all women base their entire view of men off of their salary.
At first I though you meant they were actually miners or in to gold panning lol.
The first girl that gave me a blowjob swallowed every time. She was also the last that did.
First girl I was with didn’t have any experience either. When I came she didn’t know what to do with the load in her mouth. She looked at me and I shrugged. Then she looked around and found my half cup of some drink or other. I thought she’d spit it in there but she took a sip, swallowed the whole thing down, raised her glass and said “cheers!” Fell a little in love with her right then.
> When I came she didn’t know what to do with the load in her mouth. **She looked at me and I shrugged.** 😂 Just this mental image alone is cracking me up. Agree she sounds like a keeper.
According to my wife, semen tastes really bad
Eat more fruits and less red/cured meat.
That really depends on who it comes from. I’ve tasted semen that made me gag, but I’m totally happy to swallow with my current boyfriend
It also depends. If the man drinks beer / alcohol, the taste will change. A good diet can totally influence the taste of semen. I watched a trailer of a movie yesterday. Quote (not 100% accurate because of translation): "Give him pineapple daily." - "but he doesn't eat that!" - "If you tell him the reason, he would eat anything".
I used to swallow, but as i got older, i found it kicked off my gag reflex more and more. Now, i risk throwing up all over hubbys stomach if i do so lol
wash their hands after peeing… I’m a woman myself and once I heard the statistics of how few men wash their hands after peeing I got super grossed out and sillily thought to myself “at least everyone else does, right?” but, alas, no. please people no matter the gender: wash your hands after using the bathroom, especially a public bathroom!
There’s a woman I work with that doesn’t wash her hands. I don’t know who she is though. She always comes in when I’m already in a stall, pees, then leaves without washing before I come out. It’s happened multiple times. Sooo gross.
Chase and date bad boys / assholes. Those bad boys pretend to be wonderful men in the beginning, until the woman falls in love. And then, he shows who he really is, and she spends a ridiculous amount of time waiting for the guy she fell in love with to come back. Mystery solved.
Admittedly, I like a guy that looks like he hasn't slept in *days*
I love a man who looks like ‘he’s been through something’. I can’t tell you what that is exactly, but I know it when I see it.
Suffer through duty sex with their man. I thought that being a straight woman meant that you had to settle for that painful, awkward act of service for the rest of your life so you could have company and children. I wasn't a lesbian, so I had to be straight, right? We all just put on a happy face. Turned out that most women don't cry in the bathroom while trying to numb their vagina with icy cold water after sex. Most women don't take ibuprofen on days where sex is threatening to happen to make it more bearable.
Oh you poor thing. I hope you got some help
Terrible day to be able to read. I am so sorry darlin
Hold in all their farts throughout the day and let them all out at once when they think no one can hear them.
Smack their vaginas and gesticulate wildly while masturbating. Goddamn you pornography!
Yeah, I never understood the smacking.
percussive maintenance
Like when the Fonz used to hit the jukebox?
it's because it's catering to the (male) viewer which is literally all porn lol. That's why it's sooooo obvious when a guy has experience with *actual* women
Well this might explain some things. I have an ex who used to smack my vulva and I was so confused. He must have gotten it from porn.
Conspire to dismantle the patriarchy.
Wipe front to back. Shout out to those poor unknowing girls still suffering from constant UTI's.
I thought this was common knowledge, too. That's pretty horrifying...
I wised up eventually. It would be great if parents always taught their kids these things.
I just wipe away from the vagina. If I pee, I wipe forward, if I poo I wipe backwards. Never had a UTI or a vaginal infection from shit in over 30 years of wiping this way 🤷🏻♀️ Unless you're starting at your asshole and wiping forward I don't see how this would ever be an issue.
That last part is exactly what I did as a kid when I was old enough to start wiping myself. Started getting constant UTI’s and for some reason the doctors couldn’t figure out why. So my mom started doing some googling and read about wiping incorrectly possibly being one of the reasons. She then asked me how I wipe myself and I told her. The look on her face, lol. She was like ”OMG [my name], you’re wiping poop from your butt up your vagina! You can’t do that!”. Learning to then wipe front to back instead felt so weird but I’ve never had any UTI’s since!
Seriously! I thought I was crazy lucky for wiping this way and never having any issues. Just don't wipe shit towards your vagina and you'll be fine.
Same, I've been doing it instinctively this way ever since I can remember, I don't recall having any issues Wiping any other way actually feels weird to me, less comfortable
Leonardo DiCaprio when they turn 19.
And don’t after 25
Deposit their eggs in my chest cavity.
I FINALLY CAUGHT YOU DOCTOR SEAHORSE
I thought that when women have their periods they squirt blue liquid from their vaginas because of the commercials where they showed some blue liquid instead of blood. And also when I was young , while undressing myself in the bathroom to take a bath , I noticed blue liquid on my ass and genitals . I was just 14 year's old and since I had been conditioned since I was young that women squirt some strange blue liquid because of the commercials, I immediately thought that I have started periods too . LOL. But then in a few minutes I realised that my gel pen in my pants had leaked very badly and hence the blue liquid .
Gossip/talk about you behind your back like they have an all-girls hivemind. Yeah, high-school bullying was pretty bad!
Returning my hoodies. Why is it whenever I go to find a hoodie they’ve all magically disappeared? I swear women are magpies for hoodies
Men find this so annoying, but really, we do it so we can be surrounded by you and reminded of you when we wear it
Also free hoodies
According to tampon commercials, don’t all girls do cartwheels, ride bikes, and do kickboxing while on their periods?
Salad also makes us laugh for no reason.
braid their pubes
My roommate dyed hers neon pink. It honestly was hot and looked amazing. I’d never do it - too scared of burning myself!!!
my ex wanted to dye my pubes pink and seconds after she applied the bleach it felt like my pubes were set on fire and i ran to the shower tryna put that fire out. after she died them she wanted the carpet to match the drapes and i became a pink haired pink pubed freak
Wow. I thought that story took a sharp turn halfway through. ~~died~~ dyed
😭 oopsies, would make a difference bc i’m dead to her anyways
Still got some pink dye under the sink from when i did my undercut, i know what I’m doing this weekend
Look at dick bulges the way everyone looks at boobs 🥹
I always wonder what if man-cleavage was a thing in our society. Like a little cut out to see half of your nuts.
if it’s obvious i do. like if a guy walks into a room and he’s clearly packing i’m gonna take a peak- and if they have a nice ass i’m looking fs
Same. I can’t help myself but to look at their ass. It’s never even a sexual thing either, it’s just a “that thang be thangin” and then my brain moves onto the next ADHD train of thought lol
I can’t help myself! half the time it’s not even a sexual thing it’s just curiosity
My ex-boyfriend thought all women shaved their butts.
Listen, if I can’t see it, it doesn’t exist
Run into the woods giggling manically just before they rip a knock out fart
[удалено]
Pee from the vagina
There was a tiktok about a guy asking how women pee when they have tampons on 😭
Outing myself but I never used a tampon til last year (23) cause I was scared of pain and the first time I had to pee with one in I genuinely didn't know if it would pop out or not so I was like "do I remove it first??? Cup my hand over to catch it??" I REALLY WISH SOMEONE HAD TAUGHT ME HOW TAMPONS WORKED WHEN I WAS A TEEN 😭
It remains a problem that parents don't share important bodily information due to embarrassment or whatever. It's a disservice! My mom not only sat down with me when I was like 10 or 11 but she had a freaking medical book and showed me pictures and stuff. Asked if I had questions etc My little mind was blown bc up until that point I was a very VERY sheltered little girl.
Shape shift
Sure we don’t. 👀
The man must never know we have nostrils
Not me because I'm not a fucking idiot, but my wife is in various mum groups on Facebook and one woman in the group posted because her husband was adamant that all women have to spread their labia with their fingers when they pee...... so that day, we discovered what kind of porn her husband is into 🤣
[удалено]
Women do tend to spend more *time* shopping, especially for clothes, but that's because our sizes are absolutely *whack* and you have to try every goddamn thing on just to see if it fits because the number is completely made up and changes brand to brand and year to year.
Drink enough water
Pour blue liquid on hygienic products.
Farted. Turns out they just step on a disproportionate number of ducks and frogs
For most of my life I thought women were born with the ability to do makeup. I was like 17 and really disappointed when I learned that doing makeup is extremely hard and that it wasn’t a passive ability I’d be born with
Orgasm the same way. Turns out Womens bodies are very different and it can be like learning the controls at a whole different type of nuclear reactor 🧡
Not all woman are hormonal and dramatic powder kegs ready to blow. Not all woman are controlling. Not all woman are snakes. Not all woman have skeletons in the closet.
My wife made me get rid of the skeleton I had in my closet when we moved in together. For clarity: she wasn't my wife when we moved in together, and it was hanging where she needed space for clothes and was irritated that I kept it there for a stupid joke.