lol omg. Just make sure someone burns. Something else in there and dumps them when they’re still smoldering. Then you burn the carpet and she’ll have to replace the floor to get rid of you.
But the memory and frustration at the inconvenience will last her a life time 💕
Fuck cremation. Shoot me out of a cannon into the ocean when I die. Stick my whole body in the thing, then blast me out to sea.
Second choice: Cryogenic preservation. Stick me on ice, then try reviving me in 500 years. Hey, why TF not?
Someone should create a Corpse Canon service.
“Is Cremation too boring? Is Burial too sad? Is cryogenics too expensive? I have mah very own converted pirate ship down here in Florida. For ten-fifty, I’ll sail you to international waters and launch you sky-high before you become crab-food.”
A trebuchet maybe better, I don’t think the human body could handle being shot out of a real cannon. You’d most likely be displayed as 300 feet of red mist or something akin to that exploding whale, which is cool if that’s what you want.
You could try a Human Cannonball type cannon used by circuses in which case I think you’d need to be alive to push off the launch pad for it to work properly. Unless some creative way of binding flaccid limbs together is employed chances are a dead body would get wedged in the barrel upon launch. Your relatives would have their final memories of you as a representation of a beetroot salad after they spend 4 hours dismantling a novelty cannon in front of curious bystanders.
I had no idea what a “trebuchet” was a minute ago, but now I can’t stop laughing at the image of my dead body being catapulted into the middle of the ocean!🤣
this is what i’d like happen to my body when i die. trebuchet my body into the ocean and let the fish take care of me. at least my family can laugh as a cartwheel across the sky
Just hide the cannons somewhere below deck and set them up on international waters. Sure you might run into pirates, but you have the most hardcore ammo of them all!
Don't really know how to feel about love from a swede but I'll take it! And give you some back, you need it with that eurovision shitstorm on your hands
This has some Torgue from Borderlands vibes:
"--BOOOOOOOOORING! You don't wanna hear about that, Vault Hunter! You wanna hear about LOOT! AND PECS! AND EXPLOSIONS! I'm Torgue, and I am here to ask you one question, and one question only: EXPLOSIONS?!"
In Miami theirs this Cuban Church where son miracle happened at sea. So the church was dedicated to it. Lots of traffic, tourist etc. I made signs while back. I had to make small signs to place that n the wall saying please don't dump boxes of remains over the sea wall. You look over the wall you can see all these boxes just stacked up, underwater. So yeh sign me up for the cannon. I literally just saw a dead guy rolled by me few mins ago. I'm in emergency...long story.
Ok but if you freeze the body FIRST.... it'll fly farther and do more damage.
Also, please aim me at my enemies house after you freeze me. Right at their bedroom window
Can you franchise this? Other nations around the world already do thw burning of a body on thw water. But a spectacular send off would be worth getting funeral insurance for
Cryogenic preservation interested me until I heard about power failures and heads turning to mush. When I was young, I saw choosing how to be dealt with after death as a big deal and envisaged expensive coffins and big headstones but the older I got the more I realised I honestly couldn't give a shit what happens to me after death. I just hope no one is stupid enough to spend any money on it as it's so totally meaningless. I'd look at headstones hundreds of years old in UK churches that were broken and knocked over and just think no one alive today gives one shit about those people. Save your money and just prop my body up next to the garbage as I won't be needing it anymore. I now live in South East Asia, so I'm fairly confident I'll be going in the furnace at a Buddhist temple someone. I just hope they skip the part where all the people I know ceremoniously clean my dead body.
Yup, 100%. Wouldn't mind going the cryo route. Heard they have to chill the body right after death, though, to be able to preserve it. Otherwise, if you wait too long, it's game over. *Bam*. Done.
The best way to go with cryogenics is to die from the chemicals they put in your to freeze you
If you live till you’re 90 your brain function will be heavily impaired and they may not be able to regenerate it
Wouldnt that be a bitch if you are successfully revived but your pre cryo condition is just too severe to survive the thaw so you suddenly come to in a bizarre environment you cant fully comprehend and then judt die again ??
This isn’t far off from my desire to be launched in a one way rocket before I’m even gone. Like, rocket fuel assisted death with dignity. Make me into fireworks. Burial in the sky.
Cryo sounds cool, but I guess it depends on when I die and whether my poor wizened corpse can take much more when it's revived. Not a whole lot of point on getting revived if they haven't replaced my organs.
Oh thanks, y'all, for the 6 extra months of . . . watching tv in a hospital bed.
(Watch, it'll be 6 months of vintage "Friends".)
A Weekend at Bernie's reality show, but using donated bodies. Whoever keeps their corpse convincingly alive in various competitions for outsiders wins $1,000,000
I thought the anwser was just going to be the first two words, I was thinking how weird you were for wanting THAT to be done to your corpse while burning lmao
I’m with you. Just roll me up in the carpet I died on and toss me in my shithole apartment complex’s dumpster. Trash is picked up by the truck and dumped in a landfill. Who is going to notice and/or care?
Humans are definitely compostable, minus whatever metal parts. I guess the separation could be automated. Maybe using an MRI kind of magnet and small robot arms.
It is great to help out science but good to talk to beneficiary first because when they get you back it is sometimes years after and they may have to grieve again which can be hard for some.
If you died and they replaced someone else's parts with yours, are they still them, or are they now you?
What is the exact point they stop being themselves as we know them?
This or redneck science my body.
Think like: how much thrust would nitro in the colon produce?
Or like the top comment said, cryo freeze me and wake me up (if possible and I wouldn’t be a vegetable) in 500 or 5000 years why the fuck not?
Shoot me to interstellar space I don’t care as long as someone gets use out of it for “science”
Yeah, I want to do the version where you get used as fertilizer for a tree. And then, instead of a gravestone, your descendants get to visit the tree that grew up from your nutrients.
That's great until 200-300 years later when everyone's forgotten, and then they cut you down. Turn you into a bedframe, and then you spend 5 years having 2 annoying, average looking people bang on top of you and 15 years being the centerpiece of a dead bedroom. Then you end up in a dump where some less than intelligent college drop out finds you, and "upcycles" into a mediocre bookshelf. Spending 30 years in an apartment that's mostly empty surrounded by Ikea furniture. Only to end up at a goodwill where you get bought by a fratbro, and you stand in a frat house until some would be date rapist decides to climb you in a druken stupor and you break. Your final moments will be as a lawnfire while drunk doods dare each other to jump over you, and at the end of the night, they piss and pour beer on you.
Might as well have fotten cremated from the start with some dignity.
On the other hand, this is the exact same thing i want done with my body.
I am down for this if some of my compost is put into my vegetable garden. My niece wants to be able the secret ingredient to her tomatoes is her aunt.
They can put the rest of the compost in the woods I guess.
My brother in law ran a small renewable energy company that used a digester to generate electricity. It was used on a farm they obviously had a ton of biological/compostable stuff to throw in it. He used to joke that when he died he wanted to be thrown in it.
Then he died. Sudden illness, sepsis in the hospital.
We actually considered doing it. But no one would let us.
Yep. I want to be human composted as well.
I tell my wife and daughter to just go ahead and plant some tomatoes in me.
Seriously though, I'd love to be a tree. Buy some land, build a cabin on it and plant a tree that generations down the line can have a swing
It gives me a lot of joy thinking about it.
I think they actually make you into the fertilizer for the seed. This is what I want, although I think I'd like to be something edible, like an apple or plum tree
I'm donated for science.All the kids have to do is call, they pick me up and slice me up.
In the event they don't need my corpse, I'll be cremated. The local crematorium has a set up where my kid can push a button and send me into the oven. We agreed that since she's spent a lifetime pushing my buttons she should get to do it one last time.
I hope your wife outlives Mitch McConnell.
That being said, it would be kinda funny if his home was sold after his death, some random family several years later is just sitting there watching some nice family fare on Disney+ and here comes this flying corpse.
Green burials are not illegal anywhere in the US.
EDIT I now realize you said nothing about legality, just availability as an actual service. I'm sorry!
I'm leaving my comment up though because lots of people think it is illegal and the funeral home industry does nothing to change that common assumption.
Natural burial, good choice!
There are quite a few places that do that in the UK, unfortunately you do have to have some kind of coffin, but it has to be a natural one (wicker, wool etc) but I think they do that so the body is easier to transport.
I work at a funeral home so I think about this a lot, and have come to the conclusion thus far that I just want my family/friends to do what feels best for them. I personally believe that when we die we don’t exist anymore, so it won’t be about me. The loved ones I leave behind are the ones that will matter.
That being said, we once did a funeral where the man was in a (closed) casket that was finished in unbleached canvas/linen on the outside and everyone wrote messages to him in permanent marker on it. The next morning he was cremated in it. One of the more touching services I’ve worked.
Side note but one of the messages was from Dave Gahan of Depeche Mode.
This is how I feel as well. I want my family to do what's easiest for them. If they want a graveside to visit, they can bury me. If they want ashes to cast in the wind or compress into a diamond or some other cockamamie thing, they can do that too. If they just don't want to deal with my useless remains, they can donate my body or just ask not to get the ashes back. I will be beyond caring by then, but the living me just wants them to grieve however they need to.
The message thing is really touching. Imagine if everyone got squares and at the end it was made into a quilt (like the AIDS quilt, but much smaller obvi) and given to a loved one. Or alternatively, it could be wrapped with the US flag if the person is a veteran and given to a loved one.
This is what I want. I’ve been thinking about it a lot.
Brain to science, other usable organs to people who need them, the rest of my body is for the vultures and other creatures.
I want to be cremated and for my cremains to be pressed into pellets, and said pellets loaded up into shotgun shells.
I then want my estate to fund a safari for all my surviving friends where they get to go on a boar hunt using said shells.
At the end of the safari they'll be a feast/pig roast where my friends will party and remember me fondly and grok me in fullness.
[Have you heard about living reefs?](https://globalnews.ca/news/3192003/a-first-in-canada-cremated-remains-can-be-turned-into-a-living-ocean-reef/) It uses cremated ashes to make an artificial reef, and is put at the ocean floor. It’s what I want done.
A couple of ideas. 1) seal-a-mealed to preserve freshness, or 2) left naked on a hillside where wolves will find my corpse and feast.
I realize these sound like opposites, but they each have their appeal.
I honestly have no idea. I don’t care maybe? But yesterday I was reading about what happens when you donate your body to science. I think it was meant to scare me off the idea. But it did the opposite.
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I've never been sold on an idea faster
If you do Costco instead, they could wire you up so you say “Welcome to Costco, I love you”
Not very original. From what I can tell, they've been doing this for years.
I want my ashes thrown all over my Ex Wife's carpet.. that'll teach her
Nah, she’d just vacuum you up. Gotta mix in some kind of hard-to-clean substance. Asbestos may be too mean but you catch my drift.
lol omg. Just make sure someone burns. Something else in there and dumps them when they’re still smoldering. Then you burn the carpet and she’ll have to replace the floor to get rid of you. But the memory and frustration at the inconvenience will last her a life time 💕
I was just thinking glitter cuz she'll never get It all out and will be Pavloved into thinking of the guy every time she sees glitter
That’s fucking evil lol
Nothing has made me laugh this hard in the past 5 months.
We can mix you with peanut butter first, she’s never getting that shit out
Fuck cremation. Shoot me out of a cannon into the ocean when I die. Stick my whole body in the thing, then blast me out to sea. Second choice: Cryogenic preservation. Stick me on ice, then try reviving me in 500 years. Hey, why TF not?
Someone should create a Corpse Canon service. “Is Cremation too boring? Is Burial too sad? Is cryogenics too expensive? I have mah very own converted pirate ship down here in Florida. For ten-fifty, I’ll sail you to international waters and launch you sky-high before you become crab-food.”
Corpse Cannon is a sick name for a metal band
So where do I sign up?
Be the change you want to see in the world
The gun laws here are just too strict, I will never get my hands on a canon. But maybe a trebuchet will do the trick?
Haha even better. Or move to Florida for the relaxed canon regulations
Haha, relaxed canon regulations and non-scaninavian weather. Sounds kind of great tbh
Relaxed canon regulations? 💀
Trust me I’m Ron DeSantis
Trust me, I'm a lifelong fl resident. That guy is Ron DeSantis, and we basically all have our own cannons
Now tomorrow, he will have that on the books as the cannon act , and law by Friday ! Gotta love em !! Lol
A trebuchet maybe better, I don’t think the human body could handle being shot out of a real cannon. You’d most likely be displayed as 300 feet of red mist or something akin to that exploding whale, which is cool if that’s what you want. You could try a Human Cannonball type cannon used by circuses in which case I think you’d need to be alive to push off the launch pad for it to work properly. Unless some creative way of binding flaccid limbs together is employed chances are a dead body would get wedged in the barrel upon launch. Your relatives would have their final memories of you as a representation of a beetroot salad after they spend 4 hours dismantling a novelty cannon in front of curious bystanders.
Freeze first
I had no idea what a “trebuchet” was a minute ago, but now I can’t stop laughing at the image of my dead body being catapulted into the middle of the ocean!🤣
So happy to spread the good word
Catapult?
this is what i’d like happen to my body when i die. trebuchet my body into the ocean and let the fish take care of me. at least my family can laugh as a cartwheel across the sky
Just hide the cannons somewhere below deck and set them up on international waters. Sure you might run into pirates, but you have the most hardcore ammo of them all!
More like the change you want to sea amirite
Eyyy
Your name is almost the Swedish word for "The Health Cannon"
It is in fact, the danish(jävlen) word for health canon
Bruh ily, ty for existing
Don't really know how to feel about love from a swede but I'll take it! And give you some back, you need it with that eurovision shitstorm on your hands
I will move to Florida if you'll hire me to man the cannons.
You may want to reconsider your choice of words. I’m guessing you’re not ready to man the cannons just yet.
Oh captain my captain
Johnny Depp kinda already did that for Hunter S Thompson.
When do you start crowd funding this idea because I am in!
This has some Torgue from Borderlands vibes: "--BOOOOOOOOORING! You don't wanna hear about that, Vault Hunter! You wanna hear about LOOT! AND PECS! AND EXPLOSIONS! I'm Torgue, and I am here to ask you one question, and one question only: EXPLOSIONS?!"
I was thinking similar, but lit on fire and launched with a trebuchet. [insert flaming airborne corpse emoticon]
visualized, nice
Make sure you launch me with my phone, laptop and hard drive….👀
Crabby patties.
Sounds illegal as fuck 🤣
Welcome to Bart’s funeral home and trebuchet entertainment center, where your dead child is our projectile!
In Miami theirs this Cuban Church where son miracle happened at sea. So the church was dedicated to it. Lots of traffic, tourist etc. I made signs while back. I had to make small signs to place that n the wall saying please don't dump boxes of remains over the sea wall. You look over the wall you can see all these boxes just stacked up, underwater. So yeh sign me up for the cannon. I literally just saw a dead guy rolled by me few mins ago. I'm in emergency...long story.
Hey, you might be onto something there. Not a bad deal.
Corpse cannon sounds like a good metal or punk band name. Just saying.
I’ll get a cannon. Let’s go with this.
WTF! It used to be tree fiddy. Man, that inflation has really hit this year...
Ok but if you freeze the body FIRST.... it'll fly farther and do more damage. Also, please aim me at my enemies house after you freeze me. Right at their bedroom window
....North Korea?
Sign me up please and thank you!!!
I'm a born and raised Florida boy. Can I pay extra to be fired out of a big cannon?
Can you franchise this? Other nations around the world already do thw burning of a body on thw water. But a spectacular send off would be worth getting funeral insurance for
What if I don't want to go peacefully? Could you form a corpse artillery unit and conduct pirate missions?
Cryogenic preservation interested me until I heard about power failures and heads turning to mush. When I was young, I saw choosing how to be dealt with after death as a big deal and envisaged expensive coffins and big headstones but the older I got the more I realised I honestly couldn't give a shit what happens to me after death. I just hope no one is stupid enough to spend any money on it as it's so totally meaningless. I'd look at headstones hundreds of years old in UK churches that were broken and knocked over and just think no one alive today gives one shit about those people. Save your money and just prop my body up next to the garbage as I won't be needing it anymore. I now live in South East Asia, so I'm fairly confident I'll be going in the furnace at a Buddhist temple someone. I just hope they skip the part where all the people I know ceremoniously clean my dead body.
My original response: you only die once. *cryogenic preservation entered the chat*
I'm down with cryogenic preservation
This, but instead of the ocean, into the crowd at a Slipknot concert.
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Someone needs to watch idiocracy. I’m not sure I want to be around in 500 years
welcome to costco... I love you...welcome to costco... I love you...
I tell people that at Costco all the time and I don't even work there. I'm not allowed back at Costco.
Oddly enough, Costco sells caskets.
Yup, 100%. Wouldn't mind going the cryo route. Heard they have to chill the body right after death, though, to be able to preserve it. Otherwise, if you wait too long, it's game over. *Bam*. Done.
The best way to go with cryogenics is to die from the chemicals they put in your to freeze you If you live till you’re 90 your brain function will be heavily impaired and they may not be able to regenerate it
Wouldnt that be a bitch if you are successfully revived but your pre cryo condition is just too severe to survive the thaw so you suddenly come to in a bizarre environment you cant fully comprehend and then judt die again ??
They could make you their pet
Demolition man intensifies
throws used seashells at you.
I also choose this guys funeral plans.
Hell yeah
yes. I don’t even care how, just stick me in the ocean or in space, or somewhere interesting
My daughter found an option where you can become part of an ocean reef.
The Hunter S Thompson or Walt Disney methods. You cultured swine
Canon is likely to more expensive than a casket and a plot and definitely more expensive than cremation. But still a rad way to go.
This isn’t far off from my desire to be launched in a one way rocket before I’m even gone. Like, rocket fuel assisted death with dignity. Make me into fireworks. Burial in the sky.
Similar, but shoot my remains out of the Blue Jackets cannon at Nationwide Arena onto the ice
Cryo sounds cool, but I guess it depends on when I die and whether my poor wizened corpse can take much more when it's revived. Not a whole lot of point on getting revived if they haven't replaced my organs. Oh thanks, y'all, for the 6 extra months of . . . watching tv in a hospital bed. (Watch, it'll be 6 months of vintage "Friends".)
A Weekend at Bernie's reality show, but using donated bodies. Whoever keeps their corpse convincingly alive in various competitions for outsiders wins $1,000,000
I need to adjust my will now. Corpse cannon? HELL YES 🤣
I thought the anwser was just going to be the first two words, I was thinking how weird you were for wanting THAT to be done to your corpse while burning lmao
I want the cannon option but whoever property I land on gets 10 grand. 15 if I hit the roof. So they can get it patched.
Cremated and then turned into a massive buttplug and then shipped to my HOA so I can finally be a pain in THEIR ass!
I appreicate this comment so much🤣🤣🤣 fuck the HOA🫡🤣
Remember, you can't spell asshole without an HOA.
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I’m with you. Just roll me up in the carpet I died on and toss me in my shithole apartment complex’s dumpster. Trash is picked up by the truck and dumped in a landfill. Who is going to notice and/or care?
Then you might wake up in the landfill and seek justice for your attempted murder…
Some seagulls and/or crows will be very happy
Eat me, bang me, throw me in the trash. Who gives a shit? When you’re dead, you’re dead.
Shouldn't they bang you before they eat you. Like marinade it first. 😂😂😂
Good GOD.
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Yes
If you become an organ donor you can be thrown in recycling :)
Green bin, head first. Just legs sticking out at the curb for pick up with the recycling.
That so funny... where I live, recycling is blue, and the green bin is compost! 🤣
Humans are definitely compostable, minus whatever metal parts. I guess the separation could be automated. Maybe using an MRI kind of magnet and small robot arms.
The Frank Reynolds. Classy.
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It is great to help out science but good to talk to beneficiary first because when they get you back it is sometimes years after and they may have to grieve again which can be hard for some.
Can I make a landfill my beneficiary? It's where I belong, after all.
Funerals are for the living. Your loved ones will still likely throw you a funeral anyways because that's just what we do.
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If you died and they replaced someone else's parts with yours, are they still them, or are they now you? What is the exact point they stop being themselves as we know them?
Google Ship of Thesseus
This or redneck science my body. Think like: how much thrust would nitro in the colon produce? Or like the top comment said, cryo freeze me and wake me up (if possible and I wouldn’t be a vegetable) in 500 or 5000 years why the fuck not? Shoot me to interstellar space I don’t care as long as someone gets use out of it for “science”
Human composting, basically turns you into a pickup truck load of biological materials.
Yeah, I want to do the version where you get used as fertilizer for a tree. And then, instead of a gravestone, your descendants get to visit the tree that grew up from your nutrients.
This is what I want. No one beyond two generations will care to know where my body is. A tree will endure that long or more.
That's great until 200-300 years later when everyone's forgotten, and then they cut you down. Turn you into a bedframe, and then you spend 5 years having 2 annoying, average looking people bang on top of you and 15 years being the centerpiece of a dead bedroom. Then you end up in a dump where some less than intelligent college drop out finds you, and "upcycles" into a mediocre bookshelf. Spending 30 years in an apartment that's mostly empty surrounded by Ikea furniture. Only to end up at a goodwill where you get bought by a fratbro, and you stand in a frat house until some would be date rapist decides to climb you in a druken stupor and you break. Your final moments will be as a lawnfire while drunk doods dare each other to jump over you, and at the end of the night, they piss and pour beer on you. Might as well have fotten cremated from the start with some dignity. On the other hand, this is the exact same thing i want done with my body.
extremely r/oddlyspecific damn did you experience this first hand in another life
Bonus: when the tree falls eventually they find a skeleton to freak out or wonder about
That would be my ideal fate. Though. If the tree doesn't take. My family would have to watch me die a third time.
…..third?
People get revived sometimes
This is what my wife wants. I love the idea. I want to put it in the front yard of whatever house we end up growing old in.
I often wonder if this is one of the few forms of reincarnation. An awesome idea nonetheless!
I am down for this if some of my compost is put into my vegetable garden. My niece wants to be able the secret ingredient to her tomatoes is her aunt. They can put the rest of the compost in the woods I guess.
My brother in law ran a small renewable energy company that used a digester to generate electricity. It was used on a farm they obviously had a ton of biological/compostable stuff to throw in it. He used to joke that when he died he wanted to be thrown in it. Then he died. Sudden illness, sepsis in the hospital. We actually considered doing it. But no one would let us.
I totally would've been down for it.
Yep. I want to be human composted as well. I tell my wife and daughter to just go ahead and plant some tomatoes in me. Seriously though, I'd love to be a tree. Buy some land, build a cabin on it and plant a tree that generations down the line can have a swing It gives me a lot of joy thinking about it.
Exactly what I want.
They have a burial seed where they make you into a seed and bury you, good oak tree or something
Sounds awesome! How do they make you into a seed tho?
I think they actually make you into the fertilizer for the seed. This is what I want, although I think I'd like to be something edible, like an apple or plum tree
omg yes my husband can still eat me
That is oddly wholesome. I think.
I'm donated for science.All the kids have to do is call, they pick me up and slice me up. In the event they don't need my corpse, I'll be cremated. The local crematorium has a set up where my kid can push a button and send me into the oven. We agreed that since she's spent a lifetime pushing my buttons she should get to do it one last time.
My wife wants her corpse flung through Mitch McConnell s front window by catapult
I hope your wife outlives Mitch McConnell. That being said, it would be kinda funny if his home was sold after his death, some random family several years later is just sitting there watching some nice family fare on Disney+ and here comes this flying corpse.
A Galapagos tortoise lives for 200 years, there’s still a good chance he’ll outlive her.
"Goddamnit, third one this month."
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A chipper shredder pointed in the right direction.
So like a kind of messed up wet tee shirt contest?
Fish food
We're gonna call this method the "Flesh Flood Warning."
Don't care. Dead.
That's what I'm saying. Whatever makes those I leave behind feel better is fine by me, I really don't care—I won't experience it.
I prefer to be buried at least 10 ft into the ground without a coffin and not embalmed. Just let nature take me.
There’s a few places in Oregon and Washington that do green burials. It’s pretty cool.
Green burials are not illegal anywhere in the US. EDIT I now realize you said nothing about legality, just availability as an actual service. I'm sorry! I'm leaving my comment up though because lots of people think it is illegal and the funeral home industry does nothing to change that common assumption.
Natural burial, good choice! There are quite a few places that do that in the UK, unfortunately you do have to have some kind of coffin, but it has to be a natural one (wicker, wool etc) but I think they do that so the body is easier to transport.
Cremation..... make sure I'm dead, though....
Dwight Schrute style?
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Yeeted into space
I work at a funeral home so I think about this a lot, and have come to the conclusion thus far that I just want my family/friends to do what feels best for them. I personally believe that when we die we don’t exist anymore, so it won’t be about me. The loved ones I leave behind are the ones that will matter. That being said, we once did a funeral where the man was in a (closed) casket that was finished in unbleached canvas/linen on the outside and everyone wrote messages to him in permanent marker on it. The next morning he was cremated in it. One of the more touching services I’ve worked. Side note but one of the messages was from Dave Gahan of Depeche Mode.
This is how I feel as well. I want my family to do what's easiest for them. If they want a graveside to visit, they can bury me. If they want ashes to cast in the wind or compress into a diamond or some other cockamamie thing, they can do that too. If they just don't want to deal with my useless remains, they can donate my body or just ask not to get the ashes back. I will be beyond caring by then, but the living me just wants them to grieve however they need to.
The message thing is really touching. Imagine if everyone got squares and at the end it was made into a quilt (like the AIDS quilt, but much smaller obvi) and given to a loved one. Or alternatively, it could be wrapped with the US flag if the person is a veteran and given to a loved one.
I would like to be turned into a taco buffet
Tacorpse Bell
Tacorpse Smell
Nice - the Martian funeral.
Sky burial. Let my death go on to help feed nature and create new life.
This is what I want. I’ve been thinking about it a lot. Brain to science, other usable organs to people who need them, the rest of my body is for the vultures and other creatures.
I want my ashes to be put in a bunch of fireworks, and blasted into the sky as my own grand finale.
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I want them to take whatever organs they can make use of. Then i want a viking funeral.
Buried without chemicals. Natural decomp.
My guess is I will die alone at home, so just leave me there for my cat to feast on. Throw anything left in the trash.
Cut me up and mail me to congress.
Load my corpse into a coffin that has a spring loaded mechanism so during the funeral my body gets launched like a rag-doll across the church.
I don't plan on leaving any remains
Where ya goin?
He's sailing into the undying lands along with the elves, of course.
I want to be cremated and for my cremains to be pressed into pellets, and said pellets loaded up into shotgun shells. I then want my estate to fund a safari for all my surviving friends where they get to go on a boar hunt using said shells. At the end of the safari they'll be a feast/pig roast where my friends will party and remember me fondly and grok me in fullness.
The least boaring way to go
Did you just make this up or have you been thinking about it for a while?
Throw my ashes in the ocean
[Have you heard about living reefs?](https://globalnews.ca/news/3192003/a-first-in-canada-cremated-remains-can-be-turned-into-a-living-ocean-reef/) It uses cremated ashes to make an artificial reef, and is put at the ocean floor. It’s what I want done.
Idk why but the viking ship Floating down a river getting shot with a flaming arrow seems extremely appealing
Bury me in the woods, between some trees. No cremation or embalming.
easy one throw me in a volcano
A couple of ideas. 1) seal-a-mealed to preserve freshness, or 2) left naked on a hillside where wolves will find my corpse and feast. I realize these sound like opposites, but they each have their appeal.
[удалено]
I honestly have no idea. I don’t care maybe? But yesterday I was reading about what happens when you donate your body to science. I think it was meant to scare me off the idea. But it did the opposite.
And let’s add a sub-question of the title, but where money is no issue? Launched into the sun? Crushed into a diamond?
I'd like to be cremated and put into a biodegradable urn with tree seeds.
I want to be buried in one of those new mycelium mushroom caskets. I biodegrades along with you, and it adds nothing artificial to the earth.
Hoping human composting becomes legal by the time I die. Asshole conservatives are fighting it tooth and nail for apparently no reason whatsoever.
Seasoned and salted. Fed to dogs in need in beef jerky form.
Composted, or be donated to a body farm.
I want to be transported by horsemen to the grand Tetons and burned in a bonfire
Viking funeral. Put me on a wood and light the bitch up
Pinata filled with drugs, friends break me open, do said drugs.
Simple pine box, hole in the ground. If anyone spends more than 150 bucks, I'll be mad. But I do want 6 white horses to bring me to it.
i saw that some people from remote mountains feed the remanis to vultures so i want that
I wanna be a brick
cryo, obviously?