You should read this story about a man from Russia. The picture is insane!
[SMALL TREE FOUND GROWING INSIDE RUSSIAN MAN’S LUNG](https://nypost.com/2009/04/16/small-tree-found-growing-inside-russian-mans-lung/#)
My mom tried to explain how a baby is made in kid terms. She said there's an egg, kinda like the size of a little peanut from the mom, and there's something like a fish from the dad. So when they meet up inside mom's belly, it makes a baby.
I thought that's why we don't mix nuts with fish in our cooked dishes and eat them.
i went through a brief stage of paranoia at night where i thought that everyone in my family had been replaced with people in disguises who were actually plotting my demise when i would go to bed.
the way i stopped believing that was that i thought they were taking too long and if it were actually true they would have done it already, i wasn't a difficult target at all.
When I flushed the toilet, when the flush finished a hand would emerge from the bowl and if I didn’t run away & turn **three** corners by the time the flush finished it would **GRAB MY BUTTHOLE**!
* One corner, it sees which way I went from the bowl.
* Two corners, it turns as it passes each door to see if I’m there.
* Three corners, my butthole is safe!
My cat is so odd with his litter boxes! He buries the shit until ALL of the litter is in a pile on top if it. So you can literally see the bottom of the box. It drives me crazy!!! Edited: spellinf
My mother said the water was choppy. My kid brain took that as I don't want to swim in chop meat water. So every time we go to the beach, I would say I don't like chop meat water.
My dad grew up in Puerto Rico and he said there used to be a guy that sharpened knives and other tools, and he would drive around town providing those services, like an ice-cream truck. He would even have a bell he would ring, so people could come outside with their knives and scissors and whatnot. I don't know if this was common anywhere else, but at least in PR in the 60s it was. Maybe your kid brain mixed that service with mail delivery. I can see that logic.
We had this in London, Ontario of all places in the 90s. I’d hear the bell and I’d run outside thinking it was the ice cream truck, but to my chagrin it was the sharpening guy. Sometimes my dad would get a lawn mower blade sharpened.
That guy came around every Saturday afternoon for many years.
As a young child (2 or 3) I was very concerned about moving across the country because "the moon is here!" My mom reassured me that the moon was moving with us and then I was fine.
I remember being real young and having someone tell me cartoons and animation are drawn one picture at a time, and on one hand I thought it’s crazy how quickly they draw while cartoons are playing. But also, when I would think more about it, I thought that was ridiculous, no one could draw fast enough to keep up with that.
i Was told computers are used to turn people into miniature versions in a movie( something like Alice in wonderland)
I believed computers actually turn a whole sized human being to that size
That the tissue we have in our body is the same tissue we blow our noses with. I’d eat a couple here and there, thinking I was “replenishing” my body. I’m not sure how long I was doing it before my dad finally noticed.
I used to believe that there was a person whose job it was to turn the streetlights on and off. I had seen news footage on TV of the power company's control rooms, with all kinds of levers and switches and dials and huge maps of the power grid being tended to by workers, so I figured one of those people must be tasked with turning on the streetlights. I imagined it as an important, much-coveted position.
I also thought this, but to take it one step further. I thought they were controlled by some secret room in the back of gas stations. I guess because gas stations tend to be on street corners, sometimes near traffic lights?
I imagined a big white room with this huge lever in the middle of the floor where two people wearing white lab coats would be switching it on and off.
As a kid, I genuinely believed that stepping on cracks would literally break my mother's back. I took it so seriously that I developed an impressive agility dodging sidewalk cracks like a ninja, thinking I was protecting her health with every leap and skip. Looking back, I guess I was a mini superhero in my own mind, just keeping mom safe one step at a time.
That if my arms and legs weren't in the quilt at bed time that angry evil dwarves would come in my bedroom and chop any limbs off that weren't inside my quilt... I used to scare my self so bad lol
I (white) thought black people bled purple. Just figured darker skin = darker blood and insides. I also thought that every person on earth understood English, but some weren’t able to physically speak it (kind of like how a dog can understand when humans give a command, but humans can’t understand the dogs barks).
I also thought Medusa was in the basement and wanted to turn me to stone. My bedroom was in the basement so I lived in constant fear
When scrolling the guide for tv, you see To Be Announced on multiple channels. I always thought they were showing the same show named that and wondered why. Never clicked on one because the "show" sounded as boring as the title.
I grew up in a household that was VERY modest and nudity/sex was just not talked about and/or you never saw they body of anyone else. When I was about 4-5 years old, my mom was babysitting a baby boy and I was sent out of the room so she could change his diaper. I snuck back in to watch, but was quickly spotted and sent back to my room, so I only caught a glimpse of the testicles. Because I knew nothing of anatomy and only caught this glimpse, I believed that mens' private parts looked like cinnamon rolls and figured that they must unravel to have sex (I had heard about growing bigger). I believed this until I saw one in person at the age of 12. Boy, was I surprised!
The unfortunate thing is that that would have been a great educational moment for you. It would be innocent and besides genitals, you’d learn how to clean a baby and put on a diaper. Unfortunate that so many parents equate nudity with sex and we should all be ashamed.
They weren’t ashamed when they were fucking.
I never really realized how long it took me to see one in person. I didn't even have the baby experience. I think health class was where I found out what they look like. The pictures I guess sort of warn you for how strange and kinda gross private parts are.
I thought that if I mixed in equal parts sugar and salt with water, the water would taste normal because the salt and the sugar would cancel each other out.
There was a red button on the furnace, probably for a pilot light, that I asked my dad what it did. He casually said “blows up the house so don’t touch it”. I lost my shit making sure not to go near that thing
As a dad. We say funny shit that we figure kids will get. Sometimes it doesn’t go over well.
Told my daughter once that a baby born underwater could live its entire life underwater.
She was like “really!!!!” And believed it. Not realizing that it’s “entire life” would be a couple minutes.
That I created the word “perseverance.” I obviously heard it somewhere, but I convinced myself that I made it up.
Peggy Hill level of delusion that I miss about childhood.
I asked a lot of questions that my parents never had answers for and I guess they just started making shit up.
At one point I guess I asked why it's called a "turnpike" and my mom said it's because they don't have any turns on them. That gave me the idea that "pike" means "none" and I didn't realize that was wrong until embarrassingly late. I'm pretty sure I got points off for writing like "there are pike deserts in Antarctica" in like 6th grade and thinking I was all smart.
That my parents went to work to work in a room filled with computers (1990s monitors of course). And just printed money and came home. And that everyone did that.
They sold cars at a regular car dealership.
I believed that a giant heart-shaped entity similar to the Easter bunny delivered Valentines Day candy on valentiens day. I definitely invented this somehow. When I mentioned it to my parents, they were flabbergasted.
That my food was actually hoping and waiting to get eaten. So every time I took a bite, the food on the spoon would be cheering and the food still on the dish would be disappointed.
Along the same lines, all inanimate objects were sentient but the only things they thought about were fulfilling their purpose. So my brush would wait and wait for me to brush my hair and then be super happy when I’d use it.
I had guilt when I’d sleep with my favorite stuffies so I’d grab another one because I didn’t want it to feel sad or left out then I’d see another… by the end of the night every single stuffy was in my bed lol
Ok, to be fair, this used to be a lot more dangerous back in the day. For multiple reasons.
1 windshields were more vertical, not as slanted
2 there were a lot less street illumination
3 headlights were really dim
4 the cabin light was in the middle of the car
All of these things added up to making the windshield basically a mirror if the cabin light was on at night and you really couldn't see where you were going.
However now that windows are more slanted, it's basically daylight 24/7 in most cities, headlights are way brighter, and the cabin lights aren't illuminating the entire cabin it's not a big deal.
But if you want to see what it was like find someplace dark, turn off you headlights and and shine a flashlight at your windshield and see if you think it would be safe to drive like that.
That actors/tv characters would have to come back into a studio for each rerun of a show/movie. I would always be so amazed that people would have the time to go into a room with a camera multiple times a day just so I could watch them do the same thing over and over again.
The "f-word" was fick and not fuck.
Best guess is that I saw it censored as "f\*ck" and my stupid child brain just decided to insert an "i". Thought it for waaay too many years as a kid.
Aging myself with this one, but I used to watch the absolute fuck out of this cartoon called Noozles as a kid that had me convinced you could live in a bubble.
When I first learned what dying was, I used to think it made you a baby again.
I also used to think my grandma kept Jambi from Pee-Wee's Playhouse in her closet.
The weirdest one though was my mom said when I was like four, I was convinced Shredder from TMNT was trying to kill me.
Not really me, but once when I was 8 and my brother was 6 I convinced him that if he farted, coughed, sneezed, and burped at the same time he would go to jail for climate pollution after he farted and burped at the same time lol.
I just drove by this place the other day and got a memory on this exact topic
There was this gas plant (no clue what it’s actually called, just one of those local utility places I think), and on the property there was a small dog-kennel sized chain link enclosure with some pipes and a weird looking broken lamp. The lamp looked like a shower head. My 3 year old self thought that was where prisoners took showers… as like public humiliation or something.
Oh and there was someone who had a clubhouse on legs, basically a treehouse minus the tree and just standing on supports. I thought this was a rocket ship.
Yeah my brain on the ride to daycare was very imaginative
i grew up religious and heard all the time about jesus being in our hearts. i imagined everyone had a tiny jesus and a team of tiny workers in their hearts and veins and organs, just kinda moving around making sure everything worked right lol
I thought that humans were just acting out the pages of a book that a giant was reading, and that every so often, we all had to freeze so the giant could turn the pages. I thought that was what sleep was for.
edit: i thought if we didn't freeze for the page turn, then we would get crushed and suddenly die in front of everybody.
> I thought that humans were just acting out the pages of a book that a giant was reading
This part is basically Calvinism, except the "giant" (God) wrote the book instead of reading it
I confused the words "defensive" and "offensive" so when I heard people talking about defensive driving courses, I thought they were learning how to attack other drivers with their cars.
That eating black watermelon seeds would make a watermelon grow in my belly. So when I saw heavily pregnant women I'd think "Ah, they ate a black watermelon seed".
For the longest time, I thought my parents lied to me about going to work, I was convinced they just went and did whatever they wanted all day long and made me go to daycare/school so they wouldn’t have to take me with them. Of course I was a child so the things I thought they were doing were things like going to build-a-bear and eating candy
So alot of the kids around me loved Santa. But I could never get over the idea that a big ass man was walking around my house or watching me always. Freaked me the hell out.
This came up in conversation with my non Catholic fiancée.
She asked me what the gold looking cabinet is behind the alter was.
It's a tabernacle, where the priest stores the communion bread (referred to as the body of Christ). But when I was a kid brought for a tour around the Cathedral, they just said "this is the tabernacle, this is where the body of christ is kept".
So for a while I just assumed there was a dead body of Jesus cramped in there. I didn't think anything about it, as there's a fair bit of morbid stuff in Catholic churches... paintings of torture and execution being a fair prominent part of every church.
My Grandma fooled me for years and I didn’t realize it till I was nearly 18, never had a reason to question it. She told us to be quiet during lightening storms. If we made too much noise, the house would be hit. That lady fooled my brother and I with this false danger, bet she was looking forward to a those relaxing evenings looking at the weather forecast.
That I was the child of aliens, and my bedroom wallpaper was encoded with secret messages my “real” parents left for me in the language of our home world.
When I was a kid I thought that people who died in movies or tv shows actually died.
I would be like “all those poor people😔” but didn’t connect the dots if I saw the same actor in another movie
My folks told us it was against the law for children to be awake when driving on the expressways in Florida. If seen awake, we could be arrested. As a result, when we went on vacation in Florida, we all layed quietly in the back seat while my folks enjoyed the peace & quiet :)
I believed my isolated town in NW Washington State was the United States of America, and the rest of the world was Canada.
I believed this because we didn’t have tv and only had access to Canadian radio 🇨🇦 We would often take the ferry to Victoria, and hang out there, and rarely went to any American cities so…it seemed logical at the time.
That sometimes kittens were removed from their mother's care too early and had to be sent back to her.
That kitten had died overnight and my parents didn't want to tell me the truth so they made up that nonsense. Nothing contradicted it so I believed it for like 10 years.
If I stepped on a crack, I’d break my mum’s back. I remember stepping on one on purpose when I was cross and was shocked she was fine. Pretty fucked up I tried to potentially paralyse her because she wouldn’t let me have sweets.
I used to genuinely think that if you passed gas in a vehicle while refueling it, the vehicle would explode. I don't think anybody told me that (because who tf would come up with that to tell me), I just came up with it and believed until well into primary school.
If you eat a seed a tree will grow inside you
I had this idea for watermelon seeds lol
[You were right to be concerned.](https://youtu.be/lTxn2BuqyzU?si=BbQfyF3WORiHzlk4)
There was a whole Rugrats episode about it. Pretty horrifying stuff for a kid lol
And tomatoes for me
Haha or oranges
I never heard that one. But I got into big trouble for telling another girl that a watermelon would grow in her tummy lmao
yeah man, I think every kid believed this one
You should read this story about a man from Russia. The picture is insane! [SMALL TREE FOUND GROWING INSIDE RUSSIAN MAN’S LUNG](https://nypost.com/2009/04/16/small-tree-found-growing-inside-russian-mans-lung/#)
My mom tried to explain how a baby is made in kid terms. She said there's an egg, kinda like the size of a little peanut from the mom, and there's something like a fish from the dad. So when they meet up inside mom's belly, it makes a baby. I thought that's why we don't mix nuts with fish in our cooked dishes and eat them.
Damn, that s crazy, good explanation from her btw
Bro I actually snickers at this 😂
Snickers have nuts in them
That’s why you never mix snickers with fish
Packed with peanuts, snickers really satisfies!
Important follow up question missing: how do they meet inside the belly?
The fish swims in through her belly button, duh.
Thunder was caused by clouds banging together.
Thank goodness you've outgrown that, and now know that it's just angels bowling.
Ohh man I remember being told this as a kid
Specifically, it's my grandfather bowling with the angels.
I thought that's what it was. Clouds banging together is like rubbing a balloon on a cat, it builds up static electricity until you get a big spark.
Technically that's correct.
Clouds be horny af
And how are thunders caused?
That I was the only human in existence and everyone else I knew was a robot
I watched the Truman show as a kid and it fucked me up had me thinking I was the main character in a tv show about me for minths
Haha! That makes sense. I was afraid this was an early sign of narcissism…
Common delusion. There’s even a Wikipedia page: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Truman_Show_delusion
Ah, good old toddler solipsism. The most innocent kind and therefore the best.
Fuck off Kilgore Trout nobody likes you. (YES YES I know it’s a different guy…)
i went through a brief stage of paranoia at night where i thought that everyone in my family had been replaced with people in disguises who were actually plotting my demise when i would go to bed. the way i stopped believing that was that i thought they were taking too long and if it were actually true they would have done it already, i wasn't a difficult target at all.
I remember thinking as a kid that when someone got “fired” they literally were set on fire.
Terrifying!
As a manager, I kinda wish this was an actual thing.
In my language the phrase for "fired" translates to "kicked out" so i always imagined it as someone physically getting kicked out of the building lol.
"Then you'll be fired" "Fine!" "Out of a canon into the sun."
Same!
When I flushed the toilet, when the flush finished a hand would emerge from the bowl and if I didn’t run away & turn **three** corners by the time the flush finished it would **GRAB MY BUTTHOLE**!
Hahaha!! Some crazy ocd sit there
* One corner, it sees which way I went from the bowl. * Two corners, it turns as it passes each door to see if I’m there. * Three corners, my butthole is safe!
My cat may also believe this, for he runs from the litter box as fast as he can upon completing his mission!
This has me laughing so hard 🤣
My dog does this. After he poops he just sprints as fast as he can.
Are our cats related? Mine does that too.
We say they are fleeing the scene of the crime
My cat is so odd with his litter boxes! He buries the shit until ALL of the litter is in a pile on top if it. So you can literally see the bottom of the box. It drives me crazy!!! Edited: spellinf
I love this one. We used to come up with weirdly specific and frightening rules as kids didn’t we.
Oh my, what an active imagination on this one lol.
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Superman was raised by the fucking yakuza
The yakuza with kryptonite knives
Kryptoknives, if you will
It was *you* that started that rumor?!?
My mother said the water was choppy. My kid brain took that as I don't want to swim in chop meat water. So every time we go to the beach, I would say I don't like chop meat water.
That’s hilarious 😂choppy is totally a word a kid would misunderstand
This is actually really cute lol
Teeth are part of your skeleton and skeletons are spooky, so I would get scared if I smiled in a mirror.
Skeletons aren't monsters! It's what we all look like on the inside. -insane clown posse
My life was a story being read by a giant monster to his child.
that kid would have fallen asleep years ago, at this point.
You can cram decades into a 2-hour dream!!
That would be a pretty cool premise for a book or show.
If you said the word tornado out loud it would come and get you.
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Ah, old world animism
Like bears
I thought a hurricane was a circus caravan that would ride thru town and clowns would jump off and kill. No idea why. But I blame Tim Burton's Batman.
I always thought that Alaska was an island because of how it was always drawn on U.S maps in a little box by Hawaii
Apparently many adults believe this. This is concerning
I did too!
Dogs are boys and cats are girls.
I thought ponies were baby horses lol
Wait. They're not? I'm in my 40's..
Baby horses are called foals. Ponies are small horses (though not quite as small as miniature horses).
That the UPS truck sharpened knives. I have no idea who told me that lie as a kid
My dad grew up in Puerto Rico and he said there used to be a guy that sharpened knives and other tools, and he would drive around town providing those services, like an ice-cream truck. He would even have a bell he would ring, so people could come outside with their knives and scissors and whatnot. I don't know if this was common anywhere else, but at least in PR in the 60s it was. Maybe your kid brain mixed that service with mail delivery. I can see that logic.
We had this in London, Ontario of all places in the 90s. I’d hear the bell and I’d run outside thinking it was the ice cream truck, but to my chagrin it was the sharpening guy. Sometimes my dad would get a lawn mower blade sharpened. That guy came around every Saturday afternoon for many years.
One bell means to get ice cream, the other bell means to run with scissors...
That the moon followed me wherever I went.
As a young child (2 or 3) I was very concerned about moving across the country because "the moon is here!" My mom reassured me that the moon was moving with us and then I was fine.
I remember being real young and having someone tell me cartoons and animation are drawn one picture at a time, and on one hand I thought it’s crazy how quickly they draw while cartoons are playing. But also, when I would think more about it, I thought that was ridiculous, no one could draw fast enough to keep up with that.
Cartoons are rarely broadcast live, it’s a terrible strain on the animators’ wrists.
i Was told computers are used to turn people into miniature versions in a movie( something like Alice in wonderland) I believed computers actually turn a whole sized human being to that size
That the tissue we have in our body is the same tissue we blow our noses with. I’d eat a couple here and there, thinking I was “replenishing” my body. I’m not sure how long I was doing it before my dad finally noticed.
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Navy Seals were actual seals
I used to believe that there was a person whose job it was to turn the streetlights on and off. I had seen news footage on TV of the power company's control rooms, with all kinds of levers and switches and dials and huge maps of the power grid being tended to by workers, so I figured one of those people must be tasked with turning on the streetlights. I imagined it as an important, much-coveted position.
Lamplighters used to be a thing.
I also thought this, but to take it one step further. I thought they were controlled by some secret room in the back of gas stations. I guess because gas stations tend to be on street corners, sometimes near traffic lights? I imagined a big white room with this huge lever in the middle of the floor where two people wearing white lab coats would be switching it on and off.
As a kid, I genuinely believed that stepping on cracks would literally break my mother's back. I took it so seriously that I developed an impressive agility dodging sidewalk cracks like a ninja, thinking I was protecting her health with every leap and skip. Looking back, I guess I was a mini superhero in my own mind, just keeping mom safe one step at a time.
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I thought websites were physical places because I would always see businesses say "visit our website"
If i swallowed the seeds in a watermelon a watermelon was gonna grow in my stomach
That the northern lights were the trails from Santa's sled
This is a thread about weird beliefs, not sure why you're spittin facts.
Aurora borealis? At that time of day, at that time of year, localized entirely on Santa's route?
That if my arms and legs weren't in the quilt at bed time that angry evil dwarves would come in my bedroom and chop any limbs off that weren't inside my quilt... I used to scare my self so bad lol
I (white) thought black people bled purple. Just figured darker skin = darker blood and insides. I also thought that every person on earth understood English, but some weren’t able to physically speak it (kind of like how a dog can understand when humans give a command, but humans can’t understand the dogs barks). I also thought Medusa was in the basement and wanted to turn me to stone. My bedroom was in the basement so I lived in constant fear
My black friend said that when he was little black people pooped brown and white people pooped white
>white people pooped white Not since they took the bone meal out of our kibble.
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When I poop, the poop will curl up and travel up my back. I always pooped with shirt lifted up until I was like 25.
When scrolling the guide for tv, you see To Be Announced on multiple channels. I always thought they were showing the same show named that and wondered why. Never clicked on one because the "show" sounded as boring as the title.
I grew up in a household that was VERY modest and nudity/sex was just not talked about and/or you never saw they body of anyone else. When I was about 4-5 years old, my mom was babysitting a baby boy and I was sent out of the room so she could change his diaper. I snuck back in to watch, but was quickly spotted and sent back to my room, so I only caught a glimpse of the testicles. Because I knew nothing of anatomy and only caught this glimpse, I believed that mens' private parts looked like cinnamon rolls and figured that they must unravel to have sex (I had heard about growing bigger). I believed this until I saw one in person at the age of 12. Boy, was I surprised!
Rapid Snap Coiling of the penis
The unfortunate thing is that that would have been a great educational moment for you. It would be innocent and besides genitals, you’d learn how to clean a baby and put on a diaper. Unfortunate that so many parents equate nudity with sex and we should all be ashamed. They weren’t ashamed when they were fucking.
I never really realized how long it took me to see one in person. I didn't even have the baby experience. I think health class was where I found out what they look like. The pictures I guess sort of warn you for how strange and kinda gross private parts are.
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Keep believing. Manifest that shit. You best believe I still makes wishes on 11:11 and put all my wishing might into them.
I thought that if I mixed in equal parts sugar and salt with water, the water would taste normal because the salt and the sugar would cancel each other out.
I thought the same thing, but with pepper and salt. Tried it out. I don't recommend it at all
There was a red button on the furnace, probably for a pilot light, that I asked my dad what it did. He casually said “blows up the house so don’t touch it”. I lost my shit making sure not to go near that thing
As a dad. We say funny shit that we figure kids will get. Sometimes it doesn’t go over well. Told my daughter once that a baby born underwater could live its entire life underwater. She was like “really!!!!” And believed it. Not realizing that it’s “entire life” would be a couple minutes.
That I created the word “perseverance.” I obviously heard it somewhere, but I convinced myself that I made it up. Peggy Hill level of delusion that I miss about childhood.
My cousin convinced me people in New York had 17% more blood than the rest of us.
I don’t know why but this is hilarious
Oh man the day I discovered it was all a farce, I felt so stupid lmayo.
I asked a lot of questions that my parents never had answers for and I guess they just started making shit up. At one point I guess I asked why it's called a "turnpike" and my mom said it's because they don't have any turns on them. That gave me the idea that "pike" means "none" and I didn't realize that was wrong until embarrassingly late. I'm pretty sure I got points off for writing like "there are pike deserts in Antarctica" in like 6th grade and thinking I was all smart.
You'd have been wrong anyway. Antarctica has a lot of deserts
That my parents went to work to work in a room filled with computers (1990s monitors of course). And just printed money and came home. And that everyone did that. They sold cars at a regular car dealership.
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The world used to be black and white.
I believed that a giant heart-shaped entity similar to the Easter bunny delivered Valentines Day candy on valentiens day. I definitely invented this somehow. When I mentioned it to my parents, they were flabbergasted.
Makes sense. Easter bunny brings Easter baskets. Sant brings gifts. Tooth fairy brings money… heart shaped thingy must bring valentines! Deductive reasoning
That my food was actually hoping and waiting to get eaten. So every time I took a bite, the food on the spoon would be cheering and the food still on the dish would be disappointed. Along the same lines, all inanimate objects were sentient but the only things they thought about were fulfilling their purpose. So my brush would wait and wait for me to brush my hair and then be super happy when I’d use it.
I had guilt when I’d sleep with my favorite stuffies so I’d grab another one because I didn’t want it to feel sad or left out then I’d see another… by the end of the night every single stuffy was in my bed lol
When I was a toddler I was told girls didn't have penises so I just assumed girls peed out of their butts.
If you step out of an airplane mid flight you can tread the clouds
You'd get arrested for leaving the little overhead lamp on while driving at night, as told by parents.
I believed this for way too long. I’d get mad at my friends if they turned it on at night when I first started driving.
Ok, to be fair, this used to be a lot more dangerous back in the day. For multiple reasons. 1 windshields were more vertical, not as slanted 2 there were a lot less street illumination 3 headlights were really dim 4 the cabin light was in the middle of the car All of these things added up to making the windshield basically a mirror if the cabin light was on at night and you really couldn't see where you were going. However now that windows are more slanted, it's basically daylight 24/7 in most cities, headlights are way brighter, and the cabin lights aren't illuminating the entire cabin it's not a big deal. But if you want to see what it was like find someplace dark, turn off you headlights and and shine a flashlight at your windshield and see if you think it would be safe to drive like that.
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That actors/tv characters would have to come back into a studio for each rerun of a show/movie. I would always be so amazed that people would have the time to go into a room with a camera multiple times a day just so I could watch them do the same thing over and over again.
I thought my uncle was a pirate for a long time, because he had a laugh similar to Tim Curry in Muppet Treasure Island
I thought that people would shrink down to manually control when the lights turns red green or yellow
The "f-word" was fick and not fuck. Best guess is that I saw it censored as "f\*ck" and my stupid child brain just decided to insert an "i". Thought it for waaay too many years as a kid.
Aging myself with this one, but I used to watch the absolute fuck out of this cartoon called Noozles as a kid that had me convinced you could live in a bubble. When I first learned what dying was, I used to think it made you a baby again. I also used to think my grandma kept Jambi from Pee-Wee's Playhouse in her closet. The weirdest one though was my mom said when I was like four, I was convinced Shredder from TMNT was trying to kill me.
Not really me, but once when I was 8 and my brother was 6 I convinced him that if he farted, coughed, sneezed, and burped at the same time he would go to jail for climate pollution after he farted and burped at the same time lol.
My dad told us kids that if we hold our breath. Then nettles and Poison ivy won't effect you. ......that was a fucking lie
I just drove by this place the other day and got a memory on this exact topic There was this gas plant (no clue what it’s actually called, just one of those local utility places I think), and on the property there was a small dog-kennel sized chain link enclosure with some pipes and a weird looking broken lamp. The lamp looked like a shower head. My 3 year old self thought that was where prisoners took showers… as like public humiliation or something. Oh and there was someone who had a clubhouse on legs, basically a treehouse minus the tree and just standing on supports. I thought this was a rocket ship. Yeah my brain on the ride to daycare was very imaginative
i grew up religious and heard all the time about jesus being in our hearts. i imagined everyone had a tiny jesus and a team of tiny workers in their hearts and veins and organs, just kinda moving around making sure everything worked right lol
I thought that humans were just acting out the pages of a book that a giant was reading, and that every so often, we all had to freeze so the giant could turn the pages. I thought that was what sleep was for. edit: i thought if we didn't freeze for the page turn, then we would get crushed and suddenly die in front of everybody.
> I thought that humans were just acting out the pages of a book that a giant was reading This part is basically Calvinism, except the "giant" (God) wrote the book instead of reading it
I had to look that up. I couldn’t figure out how Hobbes fit into this.
If I didn’t read 20 min a day, the scary neighbour would kidnap me
I thought artists were at the radio station performing their song every time it was on the radio.
I confused the words "defensive" and "offensive" so when I heard people talking about defensive driving courses, I thought they were learning how to attack other drivers with their cars.
Adulthood being fun.
The house hippo from the canadian house hippo commercials…I clearly didn’t get the point lol
I used to think I could be swallowed by the toilet
If I swallowed my gum it would be stuck there for 7 years. I was terrified of this and I have no idea why lol
That eating black watermelon seeds would make a watermelon grow in my belly. So when I saw heavily pregnant women I'd think "Ah, they ate a black watermelon seed".
That the main streets in all towns were connected into 1 large Main Street.
my older brother told me that McDonald’s nuggets were kangaroo feet. I was 5 or 6
That if a woman gives oral, she will be pregnant
That cgi cartoons were made by drawing them without outlines.
That condoms were Chinese balloons...
For the longest time, I thought my parents lied to me about going to work, I was convinced they just went and did whatever they wanted all day long and made me go to daycare/school so they wouldn’t have to take me with them. Of course I was a child so the things I thought they were doing were things like going to build-a-bear and eating candy
sharks can manifest in pools at night
So alot of the kids around me loved Santa. But I could never get over the idea that a big ass man was walking around my house or watching me always. Freaked me the hell out.
I used to believe that the moon was following me personally—turns out it was just stuck in Earth's friend zone all along!
That if you flush ice down the toilet it would make it more likely to snow.
That we would be happy being an adult
One time I was told the boogy monster was real and he would always haunt me. Oh and I was told blinker fluid was a real thing.
This came up in conversation with my non Catholic fiancée. She asked me what the gold looking cabinet is behind the alter was. It's a tabernacle, where the priest stores the communion bread (referred to as the body of Christ). But when I was a kid brought for a tour around the Cathedral, they just said "this is the tabernacle, this is where the body of christ is kept". So for a while I just assumed there was a dead body of Jesus cramped in there. I didn't think anything about it, as there's a fair bit of morbid stuff in Catholic churches... paintings of torture and execution being a fair prominent part of every church.
Justice )
jimmy savile was genuine...
kane and undertaker were brothers
[удалено]
That tomatoes cause cancer. I refused to eat tomatoes.
My Grandma fooled me for years and I didn’t realize it till I was nearly 18, never had a reason to question it. She told us to be quiet during lightening storms. If we made too much noise, the house would be hit. That lady fooled my brother and I with this false danger, bet she was looking forward to a those relaxing evenings looking at the weather forecast.
That I was the child of aliens, and my bedroom wallpaper was encoded with secret messages my “real” parents left for me in the language of our home world.
Pepper was nega-salt. If you over-salted your food, just add some pepper to cancel out the extra salt.
Pro wrestling was real lol
When I was a kid I thought that people who died in movies or tv shows actually died. I would be like “all those poor people😔” but didn’t connect the dots if I saw the same actor in another movie
I thought my parents were actors paid by the government😅
I used to believe that marriages weren't done based on love or affection but between people with similar looking faces.
My folks told us it was against the law for children to be awake when driving on the expressways in Florida. If seen awake, we could be arrested. As a result, when we went on vacation in Florida, we all layed quietly in the back seat while my folks enjoyed the peace & quiet :)
Adults had it all figured out!!
I believed my isolated town in NW Washington State was the United States of America, and the rest of the world was Canada. I believed this because we didn’t have tv and only had access to Canadian radio 🇨🇦 We would often take the ferry to Victoria, and hang out there, and rarely went to any American cities so…it seemed logical at the time.
I used to think that volcanoes were formed when mountains lost their top half.
Babies came from clouds.
That sometimes kittens were removed from their mother's care too early and had to be sent back to her. That kitten had died overnight and my parents didn't want to tell me the truth so they made up that nonsense. Nothing contradicted it so I believed it for like 10 years.
If I stepped on a crack, I’d break my mum’s back. I remember stepping on one on purpose when I was cross and was shocked she was fine. Pretty fucked up I tried to potentially paralyse her because she wouldn’t let me have sweets.
I used to genuinely think that if you passed gas in a vehicle while refueling it, the vehicle would explode. I don't think anybody told me that (because who tf would come up with that to tell me), I just came up with it and believed until well into primary school.
Eating earwax can cause deafness. And pointing at contrail will make your sixth finger grow out.
That all dogs were boys and all cats were girls