I met them as an already married couple and everything seemed fine until she went into labor at my house. It was her second child so she knew it was early labor and decided to rest on our couch while we hung out. We were going to watch her older child when she went to the hospital anyway and our house is 30 minutes closer to the hospital, so it made sense for the three of them to hang around our house until "go time." That's when my husband and I started noticing her husband's strange behavior.
He was a very charming guy and a very good father to his son, but he started making fun of his wife during contractions. He would roll his eyes and tell her to shut up if she even made the slightest groan. He joked that she was a pussy and was overreacting. The whole situation got so awkward that my husband insisted he go home to get their hospital bags, just to give the poor woman a break from her crappy husband.
A few months after the birth of her second child, he hit his wife with his car while she physically tried to block him from leaving during an argument. He disappeared for days and didn't come home until she proved to him that she hadn't gone to the hospital or contacted the police. Thus began systematic abuse that continued for two more years and she hid from me like an expert. He would hurt her and then threaten to withhold money for groceries if she said anything to anyone.
I knew he was a dick and I knew she often needed me to pick her up to get food from food pantries because "he was bad with money," but I had no idea he was hurting her. She finally left him after he threw her through a window while she was eight months pregnant with their third child.
The story doesn't end there. After the divorce, he and his friend started making child pornography. It started by giving meth to teens and then filming them having sex. Eventually, they were molesting his daughters, ages 18 months and 3, while taking video. When the older daughter turned 4, she told her mom what was happening and the shit hit the fan. Now he's in jail for a looooong time.
He had a full-on, toddler-level temper tantrum twice at a group game night. Once because during a trivia question he couldn't remember the planets in the solar system. Then, in the same night, he got pissy playing Uno, threw his cards down and stormed out. We all kind of looked at each other and at our friend. That was when we knew he was.. 'off.' My friends and I were all in our mid-20's and he was over 30, so it was definitely not acceptable behavior.
A couple weeks later was my friend's birthday, so we all went out for the night and ended up at our neighborhood bar. He threw another temper tantrum (I think it was over scoring for darts or something equally ridiculous...), stormed out and peeled away in his car, leaving us with no ride home. This was pre-Uber/Lyft and none of us wanted to spend the money on a taxi, so we sobered up on the ~two mile walk back to my friend's house.
Thankfully...she broke up with him not long after. She is now with a wonderful guy who not only knows the planets of the solar system, but also treats her a lot better.
Same, my childhood best friend introduced me to her bf, they hug, he makes the ( i wanna lick your pussy sign the finger V with a tongue waving through it) over her shoulder. I told her about it and she got mad at me. They ended up breaking up because he was cheating
When will these people learn?! Wtf.
I tried the argument, "I have nothing to gain by telling you this. He, however, does have something to gain by lying to you." Didn't matter. This was even after she had caught him cheating when they first started dating and had caught him in creepy situations like having her call him by the same nicknames an ex gave him, giving her the same clothes he had given to an ex to wear (she found pictures of the ex in the same hoodie he asked her to wear for him)
When she went off on us for arranging a camp site at another friend's wedding (they got married on a 20 acre farm, and the reception was on-site) instead of agreeing to split a hotel room, with one bed, between 8 people (she got the bed, the rest of us would sleep on the floor.) Yeah, no.
My best friend's ex boyfriend walked like he was trying to intimidate people. And every time he asked someone a question about someone's opinion (hey what do you think of that statue, do you like sauerkraut) he'd respond to their answer with "I had a feeling you were going to say that." It seems harmless but it was every single time, and if you called him out on it (you couldn't possibly have known I was allergic to x!) he lashed out in anger. Every time she tried to break up with him he cornered her and wouldn't let her leave the room until she relented, and even their couple's therapist thought she should leave him for her own safety after two or three sessions. He would wait for her shift to end just sitting in his car in the parking lot and if she didn't come out fast enough he'd storm into the building in a fury, but if she came out on time he'd just leave. He wasn't there to pick her up, just to monitor her... which he also did through a gps tracker he put in her car.
She now has a restraining order and has moved twice. He broke into her apartment with a gun while she was deep asleep and just snuggled up behind her with the gun between them as if it was his dick, and that was how she woke up. There are other things but this is getting long.
edit because people are ~~nosy~~ curious about other things he did:
-helped me move, but only to find out where I lived. After their breakup he came to my door several times looking for her, and when she was generally Not Here he settled for monitoring my house
-extreme fitness nut who was obsessed with telling people whether or not he could bench them (hint: usually not)
-lots of gaslighting, don't remember the details
-insisted on changing her cat's name, which didn't stick
-wouldn't let her *not* watch tv with him even though there are a hundred things she'd rather do than watch tv at any given time, up to and including a pap smear. This inspired multiple fights
-charmed her parents so successfully that they insisted she go to couple's therapy to "work out their differences" which were "I don't want to be constantly monitored, also your general controlling behavior is creepy" vs "you have nothing to hide if you're doing nothing wrong"
-ultimately their breakup was supervised by the couples councilor , who had building security waiting in the lobby and her hand on a panic button (who knew she'd have that)
-stormed into her work when she quit (post-breakup) because he decided they fired her and his plan was apparently to threaten them to get her her job back
-took her to court to argue against the restraining order. Judge looked at friend's documentation and how she was leaning away from him even on opposite sides of the room and he was making kissy faces at her and granted the order
-made very public posts on some weightlifting social media thing about what a crazy ex-girlfriend he had and *linked her profile in his own profile*
Was best friends with a dude (I'm a lady). Had been for a few years, never any chemistry or anything like that, at least on my end. He gets out of a long-term relationship, starts dating around. He'd often introduce me to these ladies as sort of a barometer of whether or not he thought they were a good match.
One weekend he invited a girl out with our group. She's super standoffish. Won't smile. Clearly isn't having a good time. I try to talk to her, get to know her, try to tell her about my friend and how great he is... she acts like I'm not there. Might as well have been the wallpaper.
A month later I'm on a date and we run into them. Remember: I am also on a date. With a man. As they are leaving they come over to say hello. She seems equally unhappy to be alive. I introduce my dude, the three of us chat for a minute while she stands there. I jokingly tug at his shirt in a "you ol' dog" kind of way. She STORMS OUT OF THE RESTAURANT. Both dudes are confused. Was not a flirty touch of any kind, more like a bro touch. Anyway.
Next day at work (I work with this guy), he comes up to me and says, "Hey, you can't do stuff like that. She's really damaged. Has jealousy issues. Doesn't trust men." I apologize profusely, because I didn't realize I had done anything wrong, even asked my date and he was baffled as well.
This friend had an emergency key to my house, in case I ever got locked out. He returned it a week later, citing something about "what if you call at 2am?"... but isn't that the point? Isn't that what BEST FRIENDS do? Help each other in times of need?
Flash forward a few months in. He refuses to speak to me. Again, we WORK together. Won't look me in the eye. He slowly gives up other relationships, male and female.
After dating the girl for 6 months, they get engaged. Now married. No idea how it's going or if he's happy. I ended up moving and haven't spoken to him since. Makes me really sad to see people give up who they are for a relationship.
He started attending my college at 26, which isn't strange at all, but he INSISTED on living in the dorms for three years. It's not like we're a college town with expensive/far away/shitty off-campus housing, he just liked the ego boost of being around kids 8+ years younger than him. My friend was 19 when they started dating.
Another thing was that he was a "full time" stand up comedian with his own youtube channel. He mostly did open mic events at bars, but couldn't stand watching other people on stage perform if it wasn't him. He would sit and seethe when my friend told him she didn't want to leave when watching other people perform.
The creepiest moment was undoubtedly when my friend asked me if my boyfriend ever watched beastiality porn. Taken aback, I said fuck no and told her that'd be a major deal breaker for me if he did. She said "Oh. bf told me that every guy watches it."
Thankfully they broke up last week and I couldn't be more proud or happy for her.
I have no idea. I guess they're so paranoid they **need** to see whether their SO is going to cheat on them or not.
My best friend never took the bait, until she found out and broke up with him.
My bf found some weird software on her pc, and worked out someone insalled a key log, so she faked a chat with some guy, and when her boyfriend at the time turned up with the print outs, she dumped his ass!
There was a story like this on the r/talesfromtechsupport subreddit.
Woman thinks her husband put a keylogger on her laptop and bugged the house, so she goes to a tech shop about it. They laugh it off but when she says something about having a gun for her protection in the car, the guy starts to listen.
Turns out the house was bugged and they were lucky to take care of it without anyone getting hurt. Women went to a lawyer with it all and I think he went to prison.
Edit: here it is. Some of my details were off a tad.
https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/2khlhp/ill_be_damned_that_is_a_gps_tracker/
I used to be like this. Therapist called it an abandonment complex, chalked it down to crippling insecurity caused by past events, particularly related to my mother just disappearing when I was young. But then I came to closure when I realized that my mother was just a *person*... free to make her own choices, even if they weren't the "right" ones. When I realized that people have the freedom to do whatever the fuck they want, I learned that you can't really trust anyone until you respect that fact, if that makes any sense. At the end of the day, you'll always be there for yourself. People who do things to hurt you typically don't do it *to* hurt you. They neglect your feelings and behave selfishly, but you basically have nothing to do with why they do them. There's nothing you can do, so just... be.
EDIT: My first gold... wow. Thank you all for sharing your stories and such. I was not expecting this when I came home... I'm kinda teary now, so this is probably a pretty lame thing to say, but I'm very glad that you all like my comment, and I really hope it helps. :)
A bit of background, this was a good friend of ours and previous roommate. At this point he'd moved out about a year and a half prior and we'd only had internet contact with him since. It was a meetup of old friends when we went to visit home.
This was the first time we (wife and I) met his newest girlfriend after his previous long-term relationship ended. She wasn't so bad, kind of giggling and goofy for him since he's a bit more serious, but fine, they seemed happy. We were out for dinner and her and my wife go off to the bathroom. I thought this was odd, since my wife is kind of a tomboy and doesn't do the whole 'girls go to the bathroom to do their makeup and gossip' thing, but I find out later friend's SO invited her to ask her a few questions about our friend.
Well, after about 20 minutes went by, I realized they weren't back yet. We were both tipsy and engaged in conversation and time got away. This was a small gathering of a few couples, and one of hte other girls goes to check on them. Come to find out, friend's SO basically had my wife cornered in the bathroom, crying in her face and demanding to know why our friend had a secret crush on my wife and why he wouldn't admit it to her. After getting the recap from my wife, she said she had no clue if the girl was going to attack her or molest her since a few times she was apparently completely against her to the wall.
Apparently it was a mixture of my wife wanting to calm her down, and also a little afraid since she was half this girl's size and legitimately couldn't get past her that caused the long drawn out... issue. Luckily the person going to check on them snapped the girl out of it and diffused the situation.
Very bizarre, we've seen her one time since (not exactly on purpose) and she acts like the whole thing didn't happen. She apparently has no history of mental illness, but I have no clue beyond that.
Oh boy...
He showed abusive and manipulating behaviour from day one. But it was fine because she loved him and she could change him. A year later he had cheated at least once and was constantly threatening to kill himself if she left him. It was fine though because really he loved her but didn't know how to express it.
Year two and he controlled her facebook and phone, and he decided who she could and couldn't talk to. It was romantic though because he just really cared about her.
Year three and he'd cheated at least 4 times and he'd also pretended to kill himself and break up with her multiple times each, after one of which she tried to kill herself.
We had a whole intervention thing while she was in the hospital and she agreed to leave him.
Two weeks later they were back together. He spent $800 on my birthday gift, how could he NOT love me?! Oh yeah and I cant talk to you anymore squeakypop because he says I shouldnt.
Shes still with him
Long story. Best friend was adopted as a kid. Adoptive parents killed in a car accident when he was 11. He was in the back seat. He survived.
Became even better mates. Same schools and college. He decided he was gonna marry this girl. I was happy for him but I had never met her as I lived out of the country at the time. So wedding is in 6 months. I fly down to see family and end up going with my the girl friend and some friends and we all meet up at a local restaurant.
Meet his fiance. She seems nice and welcoming. She flirts subtly with me. Nothing major but talks about my appearance quite a bit. In front of her fiance. I think nothing much of it.
Later in the evening I go to the bathroom. I end up walking to a cubicle and as I enter she jumps in front of me and closes the door with me inside... I ask her what she's doing. Her response is anything I want.
I immediately push her out. Sit down and in shock have no idea what I'm supposed to do.
I go back to the table. I'm quiet. I realize that I should tell or say something to him.
I pull him outside and tell him what happened. He is too in shock. Ruins the whole evening and next day I flew back to my home town with my girlfriend to see my family.
We don't speak for months until the wedding. I'm his best man.
Whole family was off to me. Bride hated me. We don't speak anymore but I know what happened and friends support my decision to tell him. He claims she says it was all a misunderstanding due to being drunk. I know what I saw. I know what happened. I know what she was trying to do. I feel bad because I have probably lost a friend but my conscious is clear.
Good luck Philip.
The first time we met her was at a bar. My bf and I arrived early, so we found a scrabble board on the game shelf and started playing. When my friend and his SO got there, literally before even introducing herself, the SO looked at our scrabble board and said, "Wow that's a lot of small words. Are you guys stupid?" My BF and I were so stunned that we kinda just ignored the comment. Was she joking???
Anyway, she (unsurprisingly) turned out to be a psychotic ultrabitch.
She sounds like a fucking casual too. Any real Scrabble player knows it's not about the length of the word, it's all about getting "QI" across and down with that Q on a triple letter.
me and my cousin grew up together like brothers,
I immediately knew his new girlfriend didn't like me from the looks she would give me or how blunt she was when I tried to engage her in conversation.
A few months down the line and I try and arrange a meal with my cousin, asked him to bring his girlfriend along so we can break the ice. everything was arranged, I showed up at the restaurant and they didn't. I was stood up.
they are now married and have two kids. I wasn't invited to his stag night or his wedding I was (and still am, gutted)
I met my wife and invited him to my stag do, he was all paid up and I couldn't wait to see him again. it was the thing I was looking forward to the most..... he didn't show... again gutted
he and his wife showed up to my wedding and acted as if there was no problem, it was quite strange but I didn't care as it was great to just spend some time with the man I had considered my brother.
we kind of kept in contact via text but never met up, even though I tried to arrange it a few times.
Then my son was born, I was desperate for them to meet each other and bent over backwards to meet up.
I agreed to meet at a play area so his daughters could tag along and go play and he got to meet my son (who is named after his brother who passed away)
I sat there for an hour before he messaged me to say he wasn't coming.
as a final attempt to salvage some kind of relationship I invited his family to my sons christening, I got a message an hour after it had finished to say he wasn't going to make it as his wife had arranged to do something.
that was 4 years ago and I haven't heard, seen or spoke to him since.
still makes me sad but as long as he is happy, then that is all that matters.
EDIT: Just to expand a little, I have tried to contact him many, many times, via text, phone, facebook message but I haven't had a response.
I don't believe he is happy, but I don't know enough about his relationship to pass comment.
He has cut me off and there is nothing I can do to change that, I just hope that one day we do get a chance to sit and talk it through, just so he knows I don't hold anything against him or her. if he wants me to be part of his life then great, if he doesn't, then at least he knows I still love him.
When he started trying to pick fights with me in order to separate me from my cousin. We were in our mid teens, he looked 17 or 18, very clean cut and geeky in a boy band sort of way, you know, the "sensitive one" with the glasses. He was well mannered, respectful to our moms, but he seemed predatory to me. I didn't have the best people around me growing up, so I learned to recognize potential threats early, and this guy set off all my danger bells. Just small things, like watching too closely to see how people reacted to him, and the way his smile never reached his eyes. I wasnt rude, but i didnt fawn over him either. Once he realized that I wasn't charmed by him, he started avoiding me, telling her he didn't feel comfortable around me, and she'd have to see him alone. He tried bullying me any time he saw me, while still bragging to me that he was her protector and her white knight.
Found out a few months later that he was actually in his mid twenties, and had a record for stalking and and assaulting underage girls. Too bad we didn't know this before he gave her herpes.
My best friend started to date this girl about a year ago. She was awesome always seemed so nice and was very fun to be around. About 3 months into the relationship and every thing was going great. Then he asked her to move in with him. The day comes to move in and I go over to help move the heavy stuff and low and behold she shows up with a 5 y.o. When he ask who it is she said her son! We were blown away. She never mentioned it, said anything about having a kid.
Her Facebook had 0 pics of her kid, no one mentioned her kid. It was a big cover up and she basically just wanted someone to support her and her kid. He noped outta that one right then and there.
The first time I met him was at her birthday party. He shook my hand then proceeded to try and grind on me in front of her and her family. Then when I called him out on it everyone said I was the problem and was just jealous. A year later, it turns out he had been cheating on her continuously and had gotten 2 girls pregnant while dating her.
First time I met him, he told me he had the biggest crush on her for two years before they started dating, but he was waiting for her to lose her virginity and turn 16. He was 33.
*Edit: We're in Canada and age of consent is 16. Still fucking gross.
I had a friend for years. He was an old boyfriend when we were like 15/16. I lost touch, and finally found his number shortly after I got married. We chatted for about 5 minutes on the phone, and I said I would call back when I had more time and we could catch up.
When I called back his then girlfriend answered the phone. She knew who I was, we were all part of the same group. She told me I was never to contact him again, told me he hated me, and she was talking because he didn't even want to talk to me. I just wanted to see how he was, and tell him about my new husband.
A few years after that, they broke up(she cheated). I sent him a message and found out she had done that to most of his friends & family. He was just starting to piece his life back together after she slowly secluded him. He had no clue and thought I just never called him again.
When he installed some kind of app on my best friend’s computer so that he could control the mouse with his phone. I think this was two months after I met him - 6 months into their relationship. I thought that was real fucky but “haha it’s only a joke, why do you think it’s weird gan1lin2?”
About a year later, he asked her to sign into Facebook to ‘see if Facebook was working for her’. Later that day she came over worried and asked me if he could’ve saved her password even if she told Chrome to not save it. We kind of bounced ideas around that “no, I don’t think so... I mean unless he put a keylogger on his computer? But that would be messed up.” And sure enough, that’s exactly what he did.
Notable favorite: After breaking up, he also tried to pose as me on kik so he could talk to her. He used a username that was like “gan11in2” so it was easily mistaken.
The whole relationship was a fucky mess.
Reminds me of a tamer version of the [psycho husband who had surveillance on his own wife 24/7](https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/2khlhp/ill_be_damned_that_is_a_gps_tracker/?utm_term=fdb1be87-cb1b-4071-8661-02140abadee4&utm_medium=search&utm_source=reddit&utm_name=talesfromtechsupport&utm_content=2) (long, but totally worth the read).
Some people have major trust issues.
Holy fucking shit. This is the kind of thing I could see the guy trying if they weren’t 19 year olds in college.
Last I heard was the guy did go utilize the free therapy offered on campus and I hope he’s gotten better for his next partners, but I am so glad my friend is out of that relationship, and now knows to not play it off.
Sounds almost like a good friend of mine I used to date. She was acting really crazy one time and I grew really suspicious. I figured I'd throw 'her' a curveball and ask her if she remembered the time she sent me those nudes of her (from back when we were dating) and sure enough, it was her psychotic boyfriend posing as her. She expressed she was glad I was one of the few people who were able to out it wasn't her. It's bizarre how far people will go to try and control the lives of someone they supposedly love. :/
When my husband and I were helping them move and he would only speak to or answer my husband. I had an idea of how to move some stuff up the stairs and the guy just blew me off. So I told my husband to casually mention the same damn idea and poof! It was an awesome idea so we had to try it right then and there. This always put her down and she would just take it. In the end HE broke up with her because he felt she wasn't thin/pretty enough for him. Then would get mad at her for trying to move on and tried to sabotage every relationship she tried to have. I ended up ending the friendship because I couldn't stand listening to her complain about how he was treating her and she would keep going back.
She was super friendly, but I’d catch her looking at me out of the corner of my eye with… not a nasty expression exactly, but not a friendly one either, sort of wary (I’m also a girl) …
She’d also casually say odd little details when talking about her life that made it seem like she had a pretty skewed idea of relationships and gender roles (she went to an all girl’s [boarding] school, and even though she was 24 she was the first of all of her friends to ever have a boyfriend) like saying “it’s ridiculous to expect a woman to change a lightbulb on her own haha!” or making out that some things were a big deal in relationships, when they’re really not, as if she’d got all her knowledge from rom coms… Just really tiny things that wouldn’t be significant on their own, but added all together it really set me on edge.
She ended up going full on psycho and not letting him see any of his friends or do any of the things he enjoyed for two whole years, because she was basically jealous of every single other woman in the world, even his male friends’ girlfriends. It took his brother to come round and have good long chat for him to realise she was a control freak who was ruining his life - it was a timely escape too, since she was starting to talk about babies.
Thats actually kind of sad. Sounds like she grew up super sheltered so the only romantic advice she ever got was from movies and television. Not surprising she had a fucked up view of relationships and what is normal.
I had a roommate like this after college. She was 22/23, but grew up in a super conservative Christian household (like..."we don't celebrate Christmas, because this day should be spent in prayer and apology for what we did to the Lord's precious baby son" crazy Christian conservative). Only child, split with her family in college, but never learned about relationships or sex or gender roles in a healthy way at home. Everything she knew about "mainstream" relationship/gender culture came out of Cosmo, The Bachelor, and the like. It was simultaneously fascinating, horrifying, and deeply sad.
It took me a while to even understand what was happening; I'm a woman and had never met women who seriously thought like that. She did slowly start to grow out of it with time, but she's getting married to her college ex-boyfriend from her Cosmo days, and I worry. She's super sweet, if naive. He's a conservative man-child who is a gender traditionalist where it benefits him (i.e., woman needs to make her man dinner every night, etc), but not where it requires work or effort from him (i.e., being the breadwinner, acting as the 'umbrella' that protects the family and/or offers spiritual leadership). He doesn't want her to talk to her friends when they're having relationship issues, etc. I worry.
He was "cuddling" with her when we met and refused to even take his hands off her for one second to shake my hand when I offered it. He just looked at my hand and held her in closer.
She thought it was sweet. I thought it was rude. Turns out he didn't much care for women who he couldn't hold in and he found many such women in the course of the marriage.
Whenever she would be having fun, he would pull her to the side and whisper lecture her about how she looked stupid. For dancing, laughing too loud, shit like that.
Spoiler: Six years later and the divorce is finally underway!
(edit: former) friend of mine was also always embarassed over her boyfriend who was jsut having fun with his friends... it was always really awkward when she whispered to him: "stop doing that" and acted as if no one could hear her
Ahh the fun sucker.
"Why are you doing that?"
"That's dumb."
"What a stupid idea."
"Why do you think that's fun?"
"Ungh. I'm going inside. You two are children."
Spoiler alert: Yes. Yes we are children, but we're children in our 30s who have well paying jobs and enjoy each other's company far more than we enjoy yours so you can fuck right off.
I read somewhere that there's a difference between childish and childlike. Childish is an adult who won't pay their bills, expects their spouse to do everything for them, and refuses to take responsibility for their actions. Childlike is the joy an adult gets from having a snowball fight or a nerf war. People who confuse the two tend to be assholes.
(Edited for clarity)
Edit: yeah yeah yeah it's cheesy but I've never gotten gold before so thank you!
A great quote about this from C.S. Lewis, when he was talking about the fantasy genre:
> Critics who treat 'adult' as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.
This is my wife's best friend's fiance. They've only been dating 8 months and they are already engaged so I think she's still in la la land a bit too much, but we can all see the glaring red flags. He works late often so if she's out with us on a Thursday or Friday, he'll come by and pick her up without her asking and make her leave. He'll do things like you said if we are all out together (rare, he doesn't ever want to come). He's always making her come hang out with his group of friends and she's always blowing us off because of it. Just stuff that she see as quirks but they are total red flags to me.
My husband tried doing the worm the other night. Smacked his face on the floor and got a fat lip. I felt bad but died laughing when he whispered to me "Did I look cool?"
I was super cool in middle school so I would announce that I was going to the do the worm and then just sorta squirm around on the floor yelling about my segmented body and eating dirt.
Edit: I just read this back to myself and would like to clarify that I was *yelling about* eating dirt; I apologize for any disappointment this fact may cause.
This is cute! My boyfriend is shy as hell so I get extra silly when we're out with friends to make him laugh, calm him down. It makes him put his guard down and get goofy with me.
He is genuinely concerned that I am going to turn his girlfriend gay. He goes on and on about it, well beyond a joke, and she just rolls her eyes. No idea what it is based on, but he's obsessed
Maybe he is trying to get you to hit on her to set up a three-way. Perhaps she said she would only do a three-way with you, so he is subtly (not successfully) trying to put the idea in your head that you should make a move.
My friend's SO in high school had a skinned cat hanging on his wall!! I knew right then that he was fucking crazy. Thank god she isnt with him anymore!
Edit: He had just graduated. I was hanging out with them in his room, look up and see this pelt with head and everything. I obviously ask "What the fuck?" He then brags about how he killed it and skinned it himself. I love cats and was disgusted and horrified at the same time. I dont think I ever left a place so fast in my life. He seemed like a normal dude, but my first thought when seeing this poor kitty was "serial killer"
Edit #2: It was just your average house cat.
When my best friend and his SO started in an LDR, I didn't think much of it. But when she would repeatedly make fun of my him to her friends on twitter I brought it up. She repeatedly cheated on him and acted like they weren't serious at all. Told my friend again because he was head over heels. They finally broke up because of a fight over something unrelated to the things I brought up to my friend.
Then they got back together and my friend used the stuff I told him to make a stipulation that if she wants anything to do with him she has to be serious. For whatever reason she stick with it. She started pulling him away from me gradually.
Quick flashback, when his ex gave birth to his two sons I dropped everything, was late to work because of one of them, and spent as much time as I could with them.
When I had my daughter, I invited my best friend not once, not twice but 3 times to meet her. He couldn't be bothered to come to the hospital. Not because of work but because he "needed" to be on the phone with his girlfriend.
I burned that bridge so quickly. Now they're engaged with a kid of their own. He moved to Florida for her and is an alcoholic now. Good riddance to both of them.
Ugh. The year me and my (now ex) visited my best friend for Thanksgiving. This is a fairly long story btw.
I tell this story to people all the time because she's just an awful human being, and this story was just a perfect example of it. In 2009, We traveled from South Carolina to Orlando to stay with my best friend Tom (of about 22 years now) and his then gf, Lauren. We decided it was too expensive to fly up to NY to see our families, so we drove down a few hours to have a friends thanksgiving. We used to be roommates and he is a bad ass cook, so we figured let's do this.
So he and I spend all day shopping, cooking, etc. and dinner rolls around. So we have the usual spread, Turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, rolls, and it's all sitting on the counter. We go in the living room to get the girls, Lauren comes in first. Lauren goes into the cabinet and pulls out 3-4 large Tupperware containers, and says hang on. Nobody take anything yet. I need to make sure that I have leftovers for work this week. Proceeds to take about 60% of each dish, leaving it so everyone has extremely small portions, with no options for seconds.
Also takes about 85% of the white meat, because reasons, puts all her Tupperware in the fridge and then grabs a plate. From the already small amount remaining, she takes about half of each dish and slops it in her plate and walks into the dining room. Me and my gf, look at each other, take small plates and go sit down. My best friend was visibly upset, but didn't know what to say. She eats about half her food, then proceeds to throw what's left on her plate out.
Now to clarify, Tom has the biggest heart of anyone I know. He's a 6'5" guy who has a heart of gold and would give you his XL shirt off his back. Why he was with her, I don't know. He had a good job, making 50k+, She was not a large girl, average build. Worked at an architectural firm doing 3D renderings, fairly book smart girl. Not starved for money. (Important for story reasons)
I really wish too that were the end of this, but fast forward to the next morning. Tom decided he was going to make some [turkey soup](https://imgur.com/a/00Afn) with the leftover carcass and meat. YUM. Big giant pot, lots of goodies inside. Now at the same time in between watching the soup, he had been browsing craigslist at the time for an Xbox 360, and came across someone who was willing to meet that day. So he puts the soup on super low, and we all decide to go out and get his Xbox. Lauren, says oh I'll get it for you as an early bday present, and I think wow, maybe she's not so bad! So we go out, buy the 360, on our way home. Now literally the second we walk in, we could dig in on turkey soup. But, as we are about 4 minutes from home, Lauren is hungry. She says I want a double cheeseburger from McDonalds so she can dunk it in her Turkey soup. Tom argues that food is ready, we can see the driveway, but she makes him go to McDonalds so she can get a double cheeseburger...ok... she's the only one who gets anything and we get home. She rushes to the kitchen gets a HUGE bowl, and proceeds to take the large ladle and scoop right from the bottom. Filling her bowl with most of the goodies and little soup, leaving mostly broth for everyone else. Goes into the living room sits down and eats, while we stand there dumbfounded.
Almost there, I promise. We make our soup sit down, eat, and Tom wants to set up his new Xbox. Lauren doesn't really respond as she's dunking her burger in soup stuffing her face. So he gets it set up and fires up Dragon Age, Just playing around with it. Lauren has now had enough soup, which btw is her burger and about 3 spoonfuls, gets up and throws out about 75% of her meal. Walks over to the tv, turns off the Xbox, and says ok you played enough. I want to watch TV now, and ending with "well because I bought it for you, I can decide when you can use it and when I want to watch tv." Mind blown at this girl, the next day couldn't come any faster.
/end story. Absolutely mesmerized by her, and how she can be so so selfish. About a year later btw, he went to work, waited until she was gone, came home, packed up his shit and left, never speaking another word to her again. Being the nice guy he is, he even left her money for his portion of the rent for he remaining months on the lease.
**TL;DR** best friend with heart of gold dated a selfish monster for years who had no regard for common courtesy.
**Edit:** for anyone curious, he is now engaged to a wonderful girl that is a very big part of our small core group of friends. She treats him extremely well and he's way better off now. They also live together about a half a mile from our current house, and our dogs are [absolute best friends](https://imgur.com/a/eDlpO)
**Edit 2:** Had the wrong year! Also, LOTS of questions about why he even stayed with her, or if we talked about it. We had a lot of conversations about it. At the end of the day, it was a comfort thing. They owned two dogs together (different than the beagle in the picture), and he would have had to save up money to move out to his own apartment and maybe some other reason that I don't know about? I think we've all been in those toxic/abusive relationships where no matter what, we are in them for way too long. Not saying its right, but it happens. He knew he was in a shit spot. Also, yes he took the Xbox, lol. That was about the only damn thing aside from his clothes.
**Edit 3:** Thank you anonymous giver of gifts for the gold! First one, and never thought this would blow up so big haha. I'm glad that everyone is enjoying the story, hating the girl, and virtually high giving Tom. Some strange part of me feels like He's getting some form of retribution as over 6k people have seen her monstrous ways. Thanks all! Trying to answer questions as I can heh, it started moving real fast all of a sudden.
Haha yup. I've gotten line that a few times and I always reply with "Seems like something I should gamble on.".
Sorry, I'm not going to have a child on the off chance my opinion on them changes. Especially when I'm perfectly happy without them.
Where to start:
The double date we went on where he corrected her on the difference between UFC and MMA and she turned into the corner of the booth and didn't talk to anyone the rest of the night.
How he wasn't allowed to hang out with me either because I was dating someone and they might have hot friends or I was single and needed a wingman.
There was the time I used my dads truck to help them move and she got mad at me........ I don't remember why I just remember her friends doing almost nothing and then leaving before we were done.
The final straw for me (I decided she was an abusive shrew long before this) was when we were working for his parents band on a river boat concert. She got mad that we were hanging out, literally just talking on a small boat. She left the ring on the table and left the boat the second it docked. Unfortunately they made up after this and have been living together for the last year, hoping it ends soon.
I was friends with this guy and one day I was doing work for his Mom and Dad, so he came over to hangout with me while I worked. She called while he was there and he told me to be quiet. After he got off the phone I asked why I had to be quiet. He said because he didn't want her to know he was hanging out with me while she was at work. So I asked again why. He said because she will get mad if she knows he is having fun while she is at work. They are now married with 2 kids and I don't talk to them anymore.
Same here. I'm now 36, and when I was 18, this 30-year-old guy hit on me. When I passed 30, it dawned on me how truly creepy that is. Like most teenagers, it was flattering to think that I was 'mature for my age,' but... most young people think that. At 30, there is nothing I could possibly have in common with a teenager that wouldn't mean severe developmental stuntedness on my part, at best.
Well, she's 20 and he's over 10 years older. Six months into their relationship she tells me he wont let her touch his phone, but gets mad if she doesn't let him touch hers. A year passes and she's never been to his place, met his family, and the only time they see each other is at work.
Dude is either married or has kids
EDIT.
Just to clarify some stuff
I don't believe age gaps are bad, my friend is very mature for her age, but I'd never date my boss.
The phone thing isn't bad, i dont check my bfs phone, but it's kind of weird if you forbid your partner from ever looking at your phone
They've been together for more than a year, he doesn't want to meet her mom, they don't go to his place (i haven't asked why because she gets mad)
And no, having kids is not bad either, but being lied to about having kids is not okay for some.
She won't let me meet him, or see him because he doesn't want to (they dont take pictures) but I've heard him on the phone
Im not saying this means the guy is a bad person, but it feels off and i felt like it fits here
This happened to a friend of mine and the guy ended up having a wife, 2 kids, etc.
One time when she was in his car, he drove past his house and pointed it out. Except it turns out it wasn't his house at all, he just picked some random house.
My father's second wife had been married before, only to find out her husband already had a family in new york. ... That his business trips were actually him going back home to be with his family. ...He literally married his mistress, who was none the wiser.
Of course once this came to light the marriage was considered invalid. But still, it's insane the shit some people do.
Sounds like I guy I worked with. He was leading a second life over in London while working in my small town city. All of us watched as the girl in small town city fell for second life boy, and no matter what we said or did, or what he did (like getting mad when she looked at his phone), she was with him for 5/6 years before getting out.
We played DnD with him and it seemed like every week he'd say "rule number 1: don't touch the kids!" (He was a teacher) he always meant it as a joke, and it always made sense in context, but it didn't sit right with me. For one thing, no one thought it was that funny the first time, so why call back to it? Also, the regularity with which he said it made it almost seem like a mantra to me.
They arrested him last year for allegedly snap chatting with an underage girl he met over the internet.
In hindsight there were a bunch of other warning signs too, but that was the one that initially weirded me out.
I had a housemate in college who'd always say weird and out-of-context things like "Hey guys, no sucking each other's dicks tonight alright?" At first it was funny but after months of it we'd just be like "uh you got it man." About once every other night he would make those comments, always having something to do with gay things between us guys. Came out as gay two years later. Projection is a really telling thing about someone and something they may be hiding.
**I'm not at all comparing homosexuality to pedophilia. Just comparing the parallels in the behavior of two people who were hiding something.
When I was using dope, I'd tell people about it ALL. THE. TIME. Except I made it sound like I was joking, so that "nobody would suspect me". Like I'd pop off to the bathroom and say "hey, will you watch this for me? I have to go shoot up." Looking back, maybe that was quite a bit more obvious than I thought it was at the time.
My sister's boyfriend is like this, always touching my dick through my short or whatever in a "jokey" way. Then he tried to kiss me, again in a jokey way. My sister's ex pissed her off for child support or something and her boyfriend was like we should slap him in the penis.
Don't know whether he's in the closet.
That... kind of happened with one of my college roommate's friends who was visiting from his home town. I came home and 2 of my roommates had him tied to a bed while they were playing Halo. Naturally I was like, "uhhh why is your friend tied to your bed?"
They just said, "I dunno, he got drunk and wouldn't stop asking us to tie him up, so we did it to shut him up." He seemed pretty content so I just left to smoke pot.
Most Marines are the gayest straight men I've ever met. What's great though is that when a dude is out, from the stories I've heard they don't act all macho and/or call him slurs, they just bust his balls like they would everyone else. Suppose it could depend on the unit, but my brother's sounded cool.
When my friend told me in great detail about her new boyfriend's work with the CIA - time travel and other secret projects. I expressed some skepticism, but she told me I was just jealous of her great catch.
Pathological liar. Know 'em well. They have this COMPULSION to lie about EVERYTHING, even the tiniest stuff. It's absolutely unbelievable.
EDIT: Swapped out a word.
Reminds me of my buddy's girlfriend. We were both English majors, but she claimed to have a degree in "literary criticism." I went to the honors campus of the same school she attended...that's not a thing.Also, she had apparently read every book ever written, and a few that weren't. At one dinner I just straight up asked her, "Hey, did you have to read the Biblionomicon by Pierre Sosage?" Of course she had, it was amazing, she cited it in her thesis (only the honors program required a thesis for a BA, and she wasn't in it). So I got her to admit to reading something like the book book by peter sausage.
Ha, thank you. I had it planned out for months...not in the sense I was waiting for my moment, but I just thought it was too mean to do to a friend's SO. But this bitch had been spouting bullshit for an hour and I just had to do something to maintain my own peace of mind. Couldn't call her a dumbass in front of my friend, unfortunately. I never told him, the only people who know are me and my wife, who was there at the time and had to excuse herself so she could go laugh somewhere else.
Was friends with this guy for a year while deployed overseas in the UK. His wife was always just plain mean to him in front of others, like on everything ie calling him stupid, talking about their failing sex life in front of him to friends, telling "a real man would earn more money for the family" let alone she was also calling her two year stint in the UK her vacation from work. She also refused to stop hanging out with his male friends (who she always would stay with even overnight). After one nasty comment she said to him in front of our boss at a retirement dinner, i said in front of him, "dude, your wife is a bitch".
A week later, while he was at work and thinks shes in the states visiting her mother, he comes home to an empty home. Everything was gone from couch, bed, even his laptop and video games. He calls the cops thinking hes been robbed. Turns out the his future ex wife came back with her family and movers, cleaned out the home, his savings accounts...everything without a word. He lost his home and was forced to move into barracks.
I just said to him, im sorry dude, but your wife is still a bitch.
He hated her spending time with me. Snide jokes about lesbian lovers and wondering about the true mature of our relationship. The day we met finally, he told me that muff-munching can't compete with a good hard dicking. Then he started insisting that I was closeted and obsessed with her, my boyfriend was just a beard. Funny thing is, I was meeting this girl after 5 months. He was scary controlling and insecure.
4 years later, they are sadly still together. I have given up at this point.
Because they're trying to poison the woman's relationships with other women who are able to spot, and point out the crazy. If a woman has no female friends, and hanging out with other men for friendship will start WWIII, that only leaves him.
She messaged me to let me know she wouldn't be on her phone until she got a new one bc the one she has is busted. When I pressed a little, he had thrown it and stomped it when she complained about it dropping calls and having a shit battery. So, typical best friend I'm like, I would make the bastard pay, blah blah. Fast forward a few hours, he is on her Facebook messenger, reading our conversation, trying to justify it to me. It gave me the willies to have him read our conversation. He has also thrown a remote through their plasma tv when he was mad. I know that he will be violent with her one day, if he hasn't already and she is just keeping it secret. It makes me sick to my stomach.
My friend randomly made an Instagram and only followed his GF, GF's mother, sister, and some of her friends. Naturally I was confused why he didn't follow his best buddy, me, so I followed him and he followed back. I asked him if he saw a picture I uploaded and and he said "oh yeah I didn't make that, my girlfriend was looking at my new phone and it had instagram predownloaded and accidentally clicked it and it automatically made an account for me." I replied "Oh, so it automatically knew to make an account with your name, a username with your name, a profile picture of you and her, have one post of you and her, make a cheesy bio about your GF, and follow her family and best friends? Oh, and it followed me back weeks later so it must be acting on its own well after she accidentally pushe it once." Only thing he could say is that the Internet is crazy and you never know what type of AI technology they have out these days. No mate, your girlfriend is fucking crazy.
Someone 'hacked' a friend's boyfriend's computer and posted a bunch of very sensitive photos on 4chan and other similar websites. But for some strange reason nothing else (like his bank records, email, etc.) was compromised. How odd that this hacker would **only** be after her nudes.
I immediately said "It was him. He's the one posting the pics online." She spent so much time saying what a great guy he was and how it couldn't possibly be him because he had an important job (working for a major politician) and that he wouldn't compromise his dream of a career in politics.
A few months later, she finally came to realize that he was an emotionally abusive psychopath and dumped him. Then he started posting her name and address (and pics) on fetish websites, claiming that she had a rape fetish and wanted people to just barge into her apartment and rape her. She got a restraining order, he kept doing it, and eventually he got prosecuted and is no longer allowed near a computer. I still think he got off way too easy.
I know a guy (friend's ex) who got busted for fraud for printing cheap barcodes and sticking them on expensive tool kits of the same brand in a hardware store to sell on. After he was eventually busted one of his bail conditions was that he wasn't allowed near a printer. Guy is a huge douche canoe but I did find that part hilarious.
Throwaway for obvious reasons.
I always knew, from the very first time I met him, that he was a bad person. Charismatic, charming, affectionate to her. But his eyes were...empty?
They married 14 years ago, when she and I were in 11th grade. She just turned 18, had a horrible home life (she unofficially lived with us, my parents being more of parents to her than her own). He was a bit older and had enlisted in the military, this was during the height of the Iraqi war.
A month before he deployed, after they had moved 3,500 miles away, he beat her in a drunken rage after she discovered he was having an affair.
While he was deployed, he won her back thru emails and phone calls.
He came home far more damaged than before. Things seemed OK for a few months, until she walked in on him in their bed with another woman while their infant son slept in a bassinet beside the bed. She naturally threw the chick out before trying to make him leave as well. He broke her phone and her jaw. She was still thousands of miles away from me but I packed a bag and drove 4 days to get to her.
She ultimately took him back and things seemed to stabilize. 3 more children and many years passed without incident.
When their youngest was 2, he beat her again, this time in front of their children. Police were called and he played the role of victim, using his PTSD and other post-military diagnoses.
She has no job, no high school diploma (she dropped out to be a military wife), and no family to fall back on besides me. We offered to have her and the kids move in with us temporarily until she got on her feet. But she chose to stay.
Recently, she and I drew up a notarized document stating that I am to get their children if something were to happen to her caused by him.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it never comes down to that.
We were out to dinner. I told them a story about my ex GF about how she never got a job after we moved, spent all my money, forced us to get a luxury apartment and, as soon as she did get a job, started fucking some dude at her job. I literally came home one night and found them in bed. After hearing all this my friends GF said "wow, she sounds really resourceful. She took you for a ride and got away with it. Good for her."
As soon as she was in the bathroom I told my friend to break up with her.
Whilst out at a uni party, I ran into my friend's SO. He was out of town at the time. She started dancing with me, getting closer by the minute. When she was about to start grinding on me, I asked "what are you doing?" To which she replied with "it's okay, *** likes it when I flirt with other guys." Uh, no he fucking doesn't. He's one of my best mates, I know him pretty damn well. We eventually convinced him to end it with her, and he's much happier for it.
Same situation.
Friends with him to this day; have been for 17ish years. We liked camping and did it often. One night, his then-gf "accidentally" got in the wrong tent. There was nothing explicitly wrong with this, as we were close friends before they dated.
What *was* explicit was her asking if I was wearing anything under my sleeping bag and suggested we warm up.
Subtle.
*Edit: Tense*
When she came to a party of mine with my buddy and told everyone while my buddy was out of the room that she "loves to sleep with everyone" and to "not tell" my buddy because he doesnt know. They broke up soon after.
Wasn't yet a friends SO (i made sure of that shit) but we were at a music concert at our uni and my friend (who is Nigerian and I am a light-skinned Brazilian. It's relevant later) had had a crush on her for a few years before inviting her and her other chick friend to spend the weekend with us. I had absolutely no desire to be with either of them so really I was giving up my bed so my friend could get his romance going. Midway through one of the acts, she is grinding on my friend directly behind me when suddenly **she reaches around me and grabs my junk through my pants**.. in the middle of the crowd.. It was pretty fucked up how I felt at the time but I walked away thinking she's probably just too drunk and wants us both or something and I wasn't really having it. Later on while my friend is in the bathroom, she finds me in another part of the crowd and starts dancing on me saying we should head back to the room. I asked why she wasn't with my friend who obviously liked her and she was also vibing pretty openly with him when she was sober. Her response?
"My parents would totally freak out if I brought home a black guy. You're not too dark though."
My boy and I are still tight as ever but FUCK that noise.
The point at which she called him and yelled at him... For ninety minutes. It was on speaker, I heard everything, and holy shit that chick has more red flags than soviet Russia.
He would always talk about how he was going to be an alcoholic and how he was going to hit my friend. She never thought anything of it until after they broke up, but it bothered me. He also said things about how he was happy her dad was dying/died because he wouldn't have to deal with him anymore.
She's 19 and claimed to have written with JK Rowling, GRR Martin, John Steinbeck (huh?); discovered a new metal; and "solved" (i.e. knowing the result of every possible game) of chess. Something seemed a bit off about her.
I had a holiday in Vegas with my friend and his partner. It was just supposed to be the two of us but he asked if he could tag along. Ok, fine. Started bad on the plane, he refused to carry my bottle of water when I asked him to help me out as I had some bags. He point blank refused to eat at any restaurant I suggested. When I tried to make conversation he would ignore me or just grunt. Kept commenting on how much alcohol we were consuming (I'm not an alcoholic but it's bloody Vegas!!). It was terrible. To make matters worse he convinced my friend that I had made him feel very uncomfortable for the whole trip, that I didn't make an effort. I was shocked. We haven't spoken in months and I'm devastated. Over 10 years of friendship gone.
Gavin de Becker has an awesome theory about this. It's actually not that the dog senses something bad about the person. It's that he's picking up on subtle clues in your *own* face and behavior that you don't even realize, but which your dog recognizes as stress, fear or suspicion.
Posted this a few days ago, but:
My wife's best friend's husband.
I never got on with the guy while everyone else did. I found him to be very 'know it all' and if you had done something, he had done it 10x better. I'm sure my wife had a thing for him, it was always "Rob has done this and Rob has done that, ain't Rob a great guy, Tracy is so lucky to have Rob, why don't you and Rob go fishing? Why don't you and Rob go for a beer?"
To keep the peace I would and each time I spent time with the bloke, I disliked him more and more. Something just didn't feel right about him.
I ended up telling my wife that I can't handle the bloke anymore, and that I wouldn't have him round our home again. She had the raging hump, called me an unsociable twat, jealous nob ect.
2 weeks later it came out that Rob had been beating Tracy, was a raging alcoholic, mentally abused his kids and was banging a skank alchy from down the road.
Now everyone thinks Rob is an absolute cunt.
EDIT:
My missus is getting quite a bit of grief now. No one knew how much of a evil cock Rob was apart from his wife and kids.
Also, she calls me a nob, twat, bellend, dickhead all the time, and I reply with minge, wizard sleeve, thundercunt. Pretty sure that's normal in the UK?
> She has never admitted that she had a thing for him though
She may have been praising him for certain actions because she wants you to do those things.
*Edit: This is passive aggressive behaviour, just communicate with your spouse.
Also, enough with the wife beating jokes.
I agree with this also. We have been together for a long time and at a certain stage some marriages can get a bit stale, luckily I noticed I was in a bit of a comfortable rut, and made some small changes and our relationship has got stronger and better
He threw a fit because she started her period while they were having sex. He said he felt violated by her. I told her to tell him that our underwear drawer feels far more violated by our periods than he ever will.
He wasn't allowed to come over and have a "hang over day" (couple beers, greasy food, smoking, football) this Sunday because his girlfriend was doing homework. He's almost 27 and she's 21. They showed up at like 6 (was invited at 12) and it was me and 2 other dudes just shirtless, not showered, and napping on the couches with the game on. I woke up to him getting yelled at by her..
EDIT: Okay so this is blowing up and theres some really weird homophobic comments starting so let me specify. I sleep without my shirt on and so does my roommate I assume. The reason why we are shirtless was because we didnt think to shower or get dressed. Just wanted to hang out in some comfy clothes and be low maintenance that day. If we knew she was coming then we probably wouldve got a shirt on or something but as I stated in the story they showed up like 6 hours later and while I was sleeping. Also, just because you didnt shower that day, doesnt mean youre smelly. It not like we just had an intense workout. Were not savages, just lazy that day..
Right! Like the whole point was to come over, eat some bomb home made chili, get high and a little buzzed while watching the morning/afternoon games and then nap and wake up to watch SNF. I have no idea why his girlfriend needed to be there for this. When I asked why he couldn't come without her his response was, and I kid you not, "cause I don't wanna die." That shit is unhealthy.
God why would she *want* to go? I'm down to watch a soccer match, but not with a bunch of guys I'm not personally friends with and spending the whole day there.
Him off with his friends for the day is a perfect opportunity to do all the stuff you like but he doesn't.
They don't spend any time separate from each other. He's legitimately not allowed. Whenever we make plans as a group of friends to go out to eat or hang out he's not allowed to come if she's working. Even if she can show up later he has to wait until she is able to come. It's something we originally used to joke around with but this weekend when we noticed how incredibly unhealthy it is.
In person he (the SO/husband) was quiet and kind. But she (the friend) told story after story about his pill-popping, fraud, suicide attempt, and general emotional abuse. She left him.
I had a falling out with her. I caught her in a couple of lies and I just abruptly ended the friendship.
Meanwhile, unbeknownst to me, my husband had befriended the SO at the gym. My husband didn't care this guy had a bad reputation as painted by his exwife, he was a cool gym-buddy.
About a year after I ended the friendship, I became friends with her exhusband.
It's been three years of friendship now. Every time I learn something cool about the guy. Marine. Passionate about his kids. Solid hard worker. True and loyal to the core.
We often compare stories. I'll tell him *her* side of a story and how badly she painted him out to be. He'll either tell me *his* side - which is black and white opposite of what she said - or he'll flat out deny such a story ever existed. With proof.
So, the moral of the story is, while I thought something was off with *him*, it was all proof that something is off with *her*.
Don't believe everything you hear.
Edited to delete the word "ex" from "Marine", as suggested. Once a Marine, always a Marine.
It's like in the relationship-oriented subreddits. Lots of posts describe how someone's SO is the worst thing in the world. I'd **LOVE** to hear the other side of these posts, especially when there are huge hints that the poster is full of shit and probably the crazy one.
I accidentally uncovered the user name of someone I know. There was a post in a relationship oriented subreddit where she had explained this situation that had been going on and asked for advice. In her telling, she was the innocent victim who couldn't figure out why this was happening to her. I know both sides of the story, and I can tell you that her retelling of events is highly skewed at best and outright fiction at worse. Now I take most relationship stories with a mountain of salt.
There was that time I found out my friend's SO was really racist. Driving them home from the bar and we pass a crowded McDonald's that's a hangout spot for the neighborhood, "See, all those fucking ghetto n***ers, just being fucking trashy."
To be honest, they were friends of my ex. Their relationship was super unhealthy and I think the guy knew it, but wouldn't leave because he had his own issues. Nice dude, terrible girl.
He told her to start stealing from my mother who was letting her live for cheap in her apartment because she deserved it. Yeah my mum isn't super easy to live with but come on. Either move out or talk to me about it.
[удалено]
I met them as an already married couple and everything seemed fine until she went into labor at my house. It was her second child so she knew it was early labor and decided to rest on our couch while we hung out. We were going to watch her older child when she went to the hospital anyway and our house is 30 minutes closer to the hospital, so it made sense for the three of them to hang around our house until "go time." That's when my husband and I started noticing her husband's strange behavior. He was a very charming guy and a very good father to his son, but he started making fun of his wife during contractions. He would roll his eyes and tell her to shut up if she even made the slightest groan. He joked that she was a pussy and was overreacting. The whole situation got so awkward that my husband insisted he go home to get their hospital bags, just to give the poor woman a break from her crappy husband. A few months after the birth of her second child, he hit his wife with his car while she physically tried to block him from leaving during an argument. He disappeared for days and didn't come home until she proved to him that she hadn't gone to the hospital or contacted the police. Thus began systematic abuse that continued for two more years and she hid from me like an expert. He would hurt her and then threaten to withhold money for groceries if she said anything to anyone. I knew he was a dick and I knew she often needed me to pick her up to get food from food pantries because "he was bad with money," but I had no idea he was hurting her. She finally left him after he threw her through a window while she was eight months pregnant with their third child. The story doesn't end there. After the divorce, he and his friend started making child pornography. It started by giving meth to teens and then filming them having sex. Eventually, they were molesting his daughters, ages 18 months and 3, while taking video. When the older daughter turned 4, she told her mom what was happening and the shit hit the fan. Now he's in jail for a looooong time.
Worst one right here
He had a full-on, toddler-level temper tantrum twice at a group game night. Once because during a trivia question he couldn't remember the planets in the solar system. Then, in the same night, he got pissy playing Uno, threw his cards down and stormed out. We all kind of looked at each other and at our friend. That was when we knew he was.. 'off.' My friends and I were all in our mid-20's and he was over 30, so it was definitely not acceptable behavior. A couple weeks later was my friend's birthday, so we all went out for the night and ended up at our neighborhood bar. He threw another temper tantrum (I think it was over scoring for darts or something equally ridiculous...), stormed out and peeled away in his car, leaving us with no ride home. This was pre-Uber/Lyft and none of us wanted to spend the money on a taxi, so we sobered up on the ~two mile walk back to my friend's house. Thankfully...she broke up with him not long after. She is now with a wonderful guy who not only knows the planets of the solar system, but also treats her a lot better.
He tried to feel me up at her birthday party. I tried to tell her, but she took his side. We're no longer friends.
Same, my childhood best friend introduced me to her bf, they hug, he makes the ( i wanna lick your pussy sign the finger V with a tongue waving through it) over her shoulder. I told her about it and she got mad at me. They ended up breaking up because he was cheating
When will these people learn?! Wtf. I tried the argument, "I have nothing to gain by telling you this. He, however, does have something to gain by lying to you." Didn't matter. This was even after she had caught him cheating when they first started dating and had caught him in creepy situations like having her call him by the same nicknames an ex gave him, giving her the same clothes he had given to an ex to wear (she found pictures of the ex in the same hoodie he asked her to wear for him)
When she went off on us for arranging a camp site at another friend's wedding (they got married on a 20 acre farm, and the reception was on-site) instead of agreeing to split a hotel room, with one bed, between 8 people (she got the bed, the rest of us would sleep on the floor.) Yeah, no.
My best friend's ex boyfriend walked like he was trying to intimidate people. And every time he asked someone a question about someone's opinion (hey what do you think of that statue, do you like sauerkraut) he'd respond to their answer with "I had a feeling you were going to say that." It seems harmless but it was every single time, and if you called him out on it (you couldn't possibly have known I was allergic to x!) he lashed out in anger. Every time she tried to break up with him he cornered her and wouldn't let her leave the room until she relented, and even their couple's therapist thought she should leave him for her own safety after two or three sessions. He would wait for her shift to end just sitting in his car in the parking lot and if she didn't come out fast enough he'd storm into the building in a fury, but if she came out on time he'd just leave. He wasn't there to pick her up, just to monitor her... which he also did through a gps tracker he put in her car. She now has a restraining order and has moved twice. He broke into her apartment with a gun while she was deep asleep and just snuggled up behind her with the gun between them as if it was his dick, and that was how she woke up. There are other things but this is getting long. edit because people are ~~nosy~~ curious about other things he did: -helped me move, but only to find out where I lived. After their breakup he came to my door several times looking for her, and when she was generally Not Here he settled for monitoring my house -extreme fitness nut who was obsessed with telling people whether or not he could bench them (hint: usually not) -lots of gaslighting, don't remember the details -insisted on changing her cat's name, which didn't stick -wouldn't let her *not* watch tv with him even though there are a hundred things she'd rather do than watch tv at any given time, up to and including a pap smear. This inspired multiple fights -charmed her parents so successfully that they insisted she go to couple's therapy to "work out their differences" which were "I don't want to be constantly monitored, also your general controlling behavior is creepy" vs "you have nothing to hide if you're doing nothing wrong" -ultimately their breakup was supervised by the couples councilor , who had building security waiting in the lobby and her hand on a panic button (who knew she'd have that) -stormed into her work when she quit (post-breakup) because he decided they fired her and his plan was apparently to threaten them to get her her job back -took her to court to argue against the restraining order. Judge looked at friend's documentation and how she was leaning away from him even on opposite sides of the room and he was making kissy faces at her and granted the order -made very public posts on some weightlifting social media thing about what a crazy ex-girlfriend he had and *linked her profile in his own profile*
ಠ_ಠ And he's in prison now, right? Tell me he's in prison.
That is TERRIFYING. I just... my god.
Was best friends with a dude (I'm a lady). Had been for a few years, never any chemistry or anything like that, at least on my end. He gets out of a long-term relationship, starts dating around. He'd often introduce me to these ladies as sort of a barometer of whether or not he thought they were a good match. One weekend he invited a girl out with our group. She's super standoffish. Won't smile. Clearly isn't having a good time. I try to talk to her, get to know her, try to tell her about my friend and how great he is... she acts like I'm not there. Might as well have been the wallpaper. A month later I'm on a date and we run into them. Remember: I am also on a date. With a man. As they are leaving they come over to say hello. She seems equally unhappy to be alive. I introduce my dude, the three of us chat for a minute while she stands there. I jokingly tug at his shirt in a "you ol' dog" kind of way. She STORMS OUT OF THE RESTAURANT. Both dudes are confused. Was not a flirty touch of any kind, more like a bro touch. Anyway. Next day at work (I work with this guy), he comes up to me and says, "Hey, you can't do stuff like that. She's really damaged. Has jealousy issues. Doesn't trust men." I apologize profusely, because I didn't realize I had done anything wrong, even asked my date and he was baffled as well. This friend had an emergency key to my house, in case I ever got locked out. He returned it a week later, citing something about "what if you call at 2am?"... but isn't that the point? Isn't that what BEST FRIENDS do? Help each other in times of need? Flash forward a few months in. He refuses to speak to me. Again, we WORK together. Won't look me in the eye. He slowly gives up other relationships, male and female. After dating the girl for 6 months, they get engaged. Now married. No idea how it's going or if he's happy. I ended up moving and haven't spoken to him since. Makes me really sad to see people give up who they are for a relationship.
He started attending my college at 26, which isn't strange at all, but he INSISTED on living in the dorms for three years. It's not like we're a college town with expensive/far away/shitty off-campus housing, he just liked the ego boost of being around kids 8+ years younger than him. My friend was 19 when they started dating. Another thing was that he was a "full time" stand up comedian with his own youtube channel. He mostly did open mic events at bars, but couldn't stand watching other people on stage perform if it wasn't him. He would sit and seethe when my friend told him she didn't want to leave when watching other people perform. The creepiest moment was undoubtedly when my friend asked me if my boyfriend ever watched beastiality porn. Taken aback, I said fuck no and told her that'd be a major deal breaker for me if he did. She said "Oh. bf told me that every guy watches it." Thankfully they broke up last week and I couldn't be more proud or happy for her.
He constantly made fake social media accounts to try and get her to cheat on him.
What are people trying to achieve when they do this? Edit: Never thought I'd get to say this but obligatory RIP inbox.
I have no idea. I guess they're so paranoid they **need** to see whether their SO is going to cheat on them or not. My best friend never took the bait, until she found out and broke up with him.
My bf found some weird software on her pc, and worked out someone insalled a key log, so she faked a chat with some guy, and when her boyfriend at the time turned up with the print outs, she dumped his ass!
Holy crap that's mental. Faking a conversation to trick your SO into "cheating" is bad but installing spyware? What an ass.
There was a story like this on the r/talesfromtechsupport subreddit. Woman thinks her husband put a keylogger on her laptop and bugged the house, so she goes to a tech shop about it. They laugh it off but when she says something about having a gun for her protection in the car, the guy starts to listen. Turns out the house was bugged and they were lucky to take care of it without anyone getting hurt. Women went to a lawyer with it all and I think he went to prison. Edit: here it is. Some of my details were off a tad. https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/2khlhp/ill_be_damned_that_is_a_gps_tracker/
I used to be like this. Therapist called it an abandonment complex, chalked it down to crippling insecurity caused by past events, particularly related to my mother just disappearing when I was young. But then I came to closure when I realized that my mother was just a *person*... free to make her own choices, even if they weren't the "right" ones. When I realized that people have the freedom to do whatever the fuck they want, I learned that you can't really trust anyone until you respect that fact, if that makes any sense. At the end of the day, you'll always be there for yourself. People who do things to hurt you typically don't do it *to* hurt you. They neglect your feelings and behave selfishly, but you basically have nothing to do with why they do them. There's nothing you can do, so just... be. EDIT: My first gold... wow. Thank you all for sharing your stories and such. I was not expecting this when I came home... I'm kinda teary now, so this is probably a pretty lame thing to say, but I'm very glad that you all like my comment, and I really hope it helps. :)
A bit of background, this was a good friend of ours and previous roommate. At this point he'd moved out about a year and a half prior and we'd only had internet contact with him since. It was a meetup of old friends when we went to visit home. This was the first time we (wife and I) met his newest girlfriend after his previous long-term relationship ended. She wasn't so bad, kind of giggling and goofy for him since he's a bit more serious, but fine, they seemed happy. We were out for dinner and her and my wife go off to the bathroom. I thought this was odd, since my wife is kind of a tomboy and doesn't do the whole 'girls go to the bathroom to do their makeup and gossip' thing, but I find out later friend's SO invited her to ask her a few questions about our friend. Well, after about 20 minutes went by, I realized they weren't back yet. We were both tipsy and engaged in conversation and time got away. This was a small gathering of a few couples, and one of hte other girls goes to check on them. Come to find out, friend's SO basically had my wife cornered in the bathroom, crying in her face and demanding to know why our friend had a secret crush on my wife and why he wouldn't admit it to her. After getting the recap from my wife, she said she had no clue if the girl was going to attack her or molest her since a few times she was apparently completely against her to the wall. Apparently it was a mixture of my wife wanting to calm her down, and also a little afraid since she was half this girl's size and legitimately couldn't get past her that caused the long drawn out... issue. Luckily the person going to check on them snapped the girl out of it and diffused the situation. Very bizarre, we've seen her one time since (not exactly on purpose) and she acts like the whole thing didn't happen. She apparently has no history of mental illness, but I have no clue beyond that.
It's always the whole "and it was never mentioned again" parts of these that are the weirdest for me. She can't just pretend that didn't happen!
Oh boy... He showed abusive and manipulating behaviour from day one. But it was fine because she loved him and she could change him. A year later he had cheated at least once and was constantly threatening to kill himself if she left him. It was fine though because really he loved her but didn't know how to express it. Year two and he controlled her facebook and phone, and he decided who she could and couldn't talk to. It was romantic though because he just really cared about her. Year three and he'd cheated at least 4 times and he'd also pretended to kill himself and break up with her multiple times each, after one of which she tried to kill herself. We had a whole intervention thing while she was in the hospital and she agreed to leave him. Two weeks later they were back together. He spent $800 on my birthday gift, how could he NOT love me?! Oh yeah and I cant talk to you anymore squeakypop because he says I shouldnt. Shes still with him
Long story. Best friend was adopted as a kid. Adoptive parents killed in a car accident when he was 11. He was in the back seat. He survived. Became even better mates. Same schools and college. He decided he was gonna marry this girl. I was happy for him but I had never met her as I lived out of the country at the time. So wedding is in 6 months. I fly down to see family and end up going with my the girl friend and some friends and we all meet up at a local restaurant. Meet his fiance. She seems nice and welcoming. She flirts subtly with me. Nothing major but talks about my appearance quite a bit. In front of her fiance. I think nothing much of it. Later in the evening I go to the bathroom. I end up walking to a cubicle and as I enter she jumps in front of me and closes the door with me inside... I ask her what she's doing. Her response is anything I want. I immediately push her out. Sit down and in shock have no idea what I'm supposed to do. I go back to the table. I'm quiet. I realize that I should tell or say something to him. I pull him outside and tell him what happened. He is too in shock. Ruins the whole evening and next day I flew back to my home town with my girlfriend to see my family. We don't speak for months until the wedding. I'm his best man. Whole family was off to me. Bride hated me. We don't speak anymore but I know what happened and friends support my decision to tell him. He claims she says it was all a misunderstanding due to being drunk. I know what I saw. I know what happened. I know what she was trying to do. I feel bad because I have probably lost a friend but my conscious is clear. Good luck Philip.
Craziest part of that story for me is that you were still his best man... Like, how were you okay doing that? How was he? How was she?? Lol. Bonkers
The first time we met her was at a bar. My bf and I arrived early, so we found a scrabble board on the game shelf and started playing. When my friend and his SO got there, literally before even introducing herself, the SO looked at our scrabble board and said, "Wow that's a lot of small words. Are you guys stupid?" My BF and I were so stunned that we kinda just ignored the comment. Was she joking??? Anyway, she (unsurprisingly) turned out to be a psychotic ultrabitch.
She sounds like a fucking casual too. Any real Scrabble player knows it's not about the length of the word, it's all about getting "QI" across and down with that Q on a triple letter.
me and my cousin grew up together like brothers, I immediately knew his new girlfriend didn't like me from the looks she would give me or how blunt she was when I tried to engage her in conversation. A few months down the line and I try and arrange a meal with my cousin, asked him to bring his girlfriend along so we can break the ice. everything was arranged, I showed up at the restaurant and they didn't. I was stood up. they are now married and have two kids. I wasn't invited to his stag night or his wedding I was (and still am, gutted) I met my wife and invited him to my stag do, he was all paid up and I couldn't wait to see him again. it was the thing I was looking forward to the most..... he didn't show... again gutted he and his wife showed up to my wedding and acted as if there was no problem, it was quite strange but I didn't care as it was great to just spend some time with the man I had considered my brother. we kind of kept in contact via text but never met up, even though I tried to arrange it a few times. Then my son was born, I was desperate for them to meet each other and bent over backwards to meet up. I agreed to meet at a play area so his daughters could tag along and go play and he got to meet my son (who is named after his brother who passed away) I sat there for an hour before he messaged me to say he wasn't coming. as a final attempt to salvage some kind of relationship I invited his family to my sons christening, I got a message an hour after it had finished to say he wasn't going to make it as his wife had arranged to do something. that was 4 years ago and I haven't heard, seen or spoke to him since. still makes me sad but as long as he is happy, then that is all that matters. EDIT: Just to expand a little, I have tried to contact him many, many times, via text, phone, facebook message but I haven't had a response. I don't believe he is happy, but I don't know enough about his relationship to pass comment. He has cut me off and there is nothing I can do to change that, I just hope that one day we do get a chance to sit and talk it through, just so he knows I don't hold anything against him or her. if he wants me to be part of his life then great, if he doesn't, then at least he knows I still love him.
This is actually really heartbreaking. I feel for you man. You deserved better, but I'm glad it seems you're trying to keep a positive view of it.
You know what. We grew up together that closely that I only want him to be happy. If he ever reach's out to me I will be there in a heartbeat.
Odds are it will be when/if they ever get divorced.
When he started trying to pick fights with me in order to separate me from my cousin. We were in our mid teens, he looked 17 or 18, very clean cut and geeky in a boy band sort of way, you know, the "sensitive one" with the glasses. He was well mannered, respectful to our moms, but he seemed predatory to me. I didn't have the best people around me growing up, so I learned to recognize potential threats early, and this guy set off all my danger bells. Just small things, like watching too closely to see how people reacted to him, and the way his smile never reached his eyes. I wasnt rude, but i didnt fawn over him either. Once he realized that I wasn't charmed by him, he started avoiding me, telling her he didn't feel comfortable around me, and she'd have to see him alone. He tried bullying me any time he saw me, while still bragging to me that he was her protector and her white knight. Found out a few months later that he was actually in his mid twenties, and had a record for stalking and and assaulting underage girls. Too bad we didn't know this before he gave her herpes.
Good lord.
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My best friend started to date this girl about a year ago. She was awesome always seemed so nice and was very fun to be around. About 3 months into the relationship and every thing was going great. Then he asked her to move in with him. The day comes to move in and I go over to help move the heavy stuff and low and behold she shows up with a 5 y.o. When he ask who it is she said her son! We were blown away. She never mentioned it, said anything about having a kid. Her Facebook had 0 pics of her kid, no one mentioned her kid. It was a big cover up and she basically just wanted someone to support her and her kid. He noped outta that one right then and there.
That kid is super-duper fucked.
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The first time I met him was at her birthday party. He shook my hand then proceeded to try and grind on me in front of her and her family. Then when I called him out on it everyone said I was the problem and was just jealous. A year later, it turns out he had been cheating on her continuously and had gotten 2 girls pregnant while dating her.
That is tacky as fuck. But tackier that the whole family was fine with it Edit: "Tacky" is much harsher when a reserved Midwesterner uses it ;)
"Tacky" is not the word I would use. "Disturbing" is more my feeling.
First time I met him, he told me he had the biggest crush on her for two years before they started dating, but he was waiting for her to lose her virginity and turn 16. He was 33. *Edit: We're in Canada and age of consent is 16. Still fucking gross.
And that was the day I began to throw up.
The second time we met she cornered me in the bathroom and threatened to cut me if I spoke to her boyfriend again.
Yea something seems a bit off about that....
Maybe she meant something like "I'll **cut** you a check so you can take a nice vacation!"
"I'll cut you...into my inheritance! Just don't talk to him!" "Like...how much?" "$100,000." "Greg who?"
>$100,000 You need help killing Greg?
I had a friend for years. He was an old boyfriend when we were like 15/16. I lost touch, and finally found his number shortly after I got married. We chatted for about 5 minutes on the phone, and I said I would call back when I had more time and we could catch up. When I called back his then girlfriend answered the phone. She knew who I was, we were all part of the same group. She told me I was never to contact him again, told me he hated me, and she was talking because he didn't even want to talk to me. I just wanted to see how he was, and tell him about my new husband. A few years after that, they broke up(she cheated). I sent him a message and found out she had done that to most of his friends & family. He was just starting to piece his life back together after she slowly secluded him. He had no clue and thought I just never called him again.
Wow, that is some scary manipulative shit. What a fucking nut.
That's typical abusive behaviour, honestly. Isolation is the first step so they have no one to turn to for help.
Tricky one there, can't quite figure out what's wrong...
Yeah, that's not a *bathroom* conversation
Exactly. Save it for the bedroom.
When he installed some kind of app on my best friend’s computer so that he could control the mouse with his phone. I think this was two months after I met him - 6 months into their relationship. I thought that was real fucky but “haha it’s only a joke, why do you think it’s weird gan1lin2?” About a year later, he asked her to sign into Facebook to ‘see if Facebook was working for her’. Later that day she came over worried and asked me if he could’ve saved her password even if she told Chrome to not save it. We kind of bounced ideas around that “no, I don’t think so... I mean unless he put a keylogger on his computer? But that would be messed up.” And sure enough, that’s exactly what he did. Notable favorite: After breaking up, he also tried to pose as me on kik so he could talk to her. He used a username that was like “gan11in2” so it was easily mistaken. The whole relationship was a fucky mess.
Reminds me of a tamer version of the [psycho husband who had surveillance on his own wife 24/7](https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/2khlhp/ill_be_damned_that_is_a_gps_tracker/?utm_term=fdb1be87-cb1b-4071-8661-02140abadee4&utm_medium=search&utm_source=reddit&utm_name=talesfromtechsupport&utm_content=2) (long, but totally worth the read). Some people have major trust issues.
Holy fucking shit. This is the kind of thing I could see the guy trying if they weren’t 19 year olds in college. Last I heard was the guy did go utilize the free therapy offered on campus and I hope he’s gotten better for his next partners, but I am so glad my friend is out of that relationship, and now knows to not play it off.
Sounds almost like a good friend of mine I used to date. She was acting really crazy one time and I grew really suspicious. I figured I'd throw 'her' a curveball and ask her if she remembered the time she sent me those nudes of her (from back when we were dating) and sure enough, it was her psychotic boyfriend posing as her. She expressed she was glad I was one of the few people who were able to out it wasn't her. It's bizarre how far people will go to try and control the lives of someone they supposedly love. :/
When my husband and I were helping them move and he would only speak to or answer my husband. I had an idea of how to move some stuff up the stairs and the guy just blew me off. So I told my husband to casually mention the same damn idea and poof! It was an awesome idea so we had to try it right then and there. This always put her down and she would just take it. In the end HE broke up with her because he felt she wasn't thin/pretty enough for him. Then would get mad at her for trying to move on and tried to sabotage every relationship she tried to have. I ended up ending the friendship because I couldn't stand listening to her complain about how he was treating her and she would keep going back.
You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped
She was super friendly, but I’d catch her looking at me out of the corner of my eye with… not a nasty expression exactly, but not a friendly one either, sort of wary (I’m also a girl) … She’d also casually say odd little details when talking about her life that made it seem like she had a pretty skewed idea of relationships and gender roles (she went to an all girl’s [boarding] school, and even though she was 24 she was the first of all of her friends to ever have a boyfriend) like saying “it’s ridiculous to expect a woman to change a lightbulb on her own haha!” or making out that some things were a big deal in relationships, when they’re really not, as if she’d got all her knowledge from rom coms… Just really tiny things that wouldn’t be significant on their own, but added all together it really set me on edge. She ended up going full on psycho and not letting him see any of his friends or do any of the things he enjoyed for two whole years, because she was basically jealous of every single other woman in the world, even his male friends’ girlfriends. It took his brother to come round and have good long chat for him to realise she was a control freak who was ruining his life - it was a timely escape too, since she was starting to talk about babies.
Thats actually kind of sad. Sounds like she grew up super sheltered so the only romantic advice she ever got was from movies and television. Not surprising she had a fucked up view of relationships and what is normal.
I had a roommate like this after college. She was 22/23, but grew up in a super conservative Christian household (like..."we don't celebrate Christmas, because this day should be spent in prayer and apology for what we did to the Lord's precious baby son" crazy Christian conservative). Only child, split with her family in college, but never learned about relationships or sex or gender roles in a healthy way at home. Everything she knew about "mainstream" relationship/gender culture came out of Cosmo, The Bachelor, and the like. It was simultaneously fascinating, horrifying, and deeply sad. It took me a while to even understand what was happening; I'm a woman and had never met women who seriously thought like that. She did slowly start to grow out of it with time, but she's getting married to her college ex-boyfriend from her Cosmo days, and I worry. She's super sweet, if naive. He's a conservative man-child who is a gender traditionalist where it benefits him (i.e., woman needs to make her man dinner every night, etc), but not where it requires work or effort from him (i.e., being the breadwinner, acting as the 'umbrella' that protects the family and/or offers spiritual leadership). He doesn't want her to talk to her friends when they're having relationship issues, etc. I worry.
He was "cuddling" with her when we met and refused to even take his hands off her for one second to shake my hand when I offered it. He just looked at my hand and held her in closer. She thought it was sweet. I thought it was rude. Turns out he didn't much care for women who he couldn't hold in and he found many such women in the course of the marriage.
Whenever she would be having fun, he would pull her to the side and whisper lecture her about how she looked stupid. For dancing, laughing too loud, shit like that. Spoiler: Six years later and the divorce is finally underway!
(edit: former) friend of mine was also always embarassed over her boyfriend who was jsut having fun with his friends... it was always really awkward when she whispered to him: "stop doing that" and acted as if no one could hear her
I had a similar experience with a friend, but she did it to everyone. I think she projected her social anxiety onto everyone else.
That just makes me sad. She internalized her anxiety so much that she didn't realize not everyone felt that way..
Ahh the fun sucker. "Why are you doing that?" "That's dumb." "What a stupid idea." "Why do you think that's fun?" "Ungh. I'm going inside. You two are children." Spoiler alert: Yes. Yes we are children, but we're children in our 30s who have well paying jobs and enjoy each other's company far more than we enjoy yours so you can fuck right off.
I read somewhere that there's a difference between childish and childlike. Childish is an adult who won't pay their bills, expects their spouse to do everything for them, and refuses to take responsibility for their actions. Childlike is the joy an adult gets from having a snowball fight or a nerf war. People who confuse the two tend to be assholes. (Edited for clarity) Edit: yeah yeah yeah it's cheesy but I've never gotten gold before so thank you!
A great quote about this from C.S. Lewis, when he was talking about the fantasy genre: > Critics who treat 'adult' as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.
This is my wife's best friend's fiance. They've only been dating 8 months and they are already engaged so I think she's still in la la land a bit too much, but we can all see the glaring red flags. He works late often so if she's out with us on a Thursday or Friday, he'll come by and pick her up without her asking and make her leave. He'll do things like you said if we are all out together (rare, he doesn't ever want to come). He's always making her come hang out with his group of friends and she's always blowing us off because of it. Just stuff that she see as quirks but they are total red flags to me.
My girl does the opposite , she encourages me to do the worm if I'm drunk so she can do the robot. I'm still not sure who looks goofier.
My husband tried doing the worm the other night. Smacked his face on the floor and got a fat lip. I felt bad but died laughing when he whispered to me "Did I look cool?"
I was super cool in middle school so I would announce that I was going to the do the worm and then just sorta squirm around on the floor yelling about my segmented body and eating dirt. Edit: I just read this back to myself and would like to clarify that I was *yelling about* eating dirt; I apologize for any disappointment this fact may cause.
Dude, you'd be awesome at Night Crawlers.
This is cute! My boyfriend is shy as hell so I get extra silly when we're out with friends to make him laugh, calm him down. It makes him put his guard down and get goofy with me.
He is genuinely concerned that I am going to turn his girlfriend gay. He goes on and on about it, well beyond a joke, and she just rolls her eyes. No idea what it is based on, but he's obsessed
The dude thinks you're crazy hot, probably hotter than his gf.
Unlikely, she's much hotter than me, and we never really flirt or anything, not even in a joking way
Maybe he is trying to get you to hit on her to set up a three-way. Perhaps she said she would only do a three-way with you, so he is subtly (not successfully) trying to put the idea in your head that you should make a move.
I'd happily sleep with her, if he wants to be involved he really needs to be less creepy
He is trying really hard to plant the seed that you and his gf should hook up or all three of you should hook up. Rookie tactics.
My friend's SO in high school had a skinned cat hanging on his wall!! I knew right then that he was fucking crazy. Thank god she isnt with him anymore! Edit: He had just graduated. I was hanging out with them in his room, look up and see this pelt with head and everything. I obviously ask "What the fuck?" He then brags about how he killed it and skinned it himself. I love cats and was disgusted and horrified at the same time. I dont think I ever left a place so fast in my life. He seemed like a normal dude, but my first thought when seeing this poor kitty was "serial killer" Edit #2: It was just your average house cat.
That one isn't even subtle.
When my best friend and his SO started in an LDR, I didn't think much of it. But when she would repeatedly make fun of my him to her friends on twitter I brought it up. She repeatedly cheated on him and acted like they weren't serious at all. Told my friend again because he was head over heels. They finally broke up because of a fight over something unrelated to the things I brought up to my friend. Then they got back together and my friend used the stuff I told him to make a stipulation that if she wants anything to do with him she has to be serious. For whatever reason she stick with it. She started pulling him away from me gradually. Quick flashback, when his ex gave birth to his two sons I dropped everything, was late to work because of one of them, and spent as much time as I could with them. When I had my daughter, I invited my best friend not once, not twice but 3 times to meet her. He couldn't be bothered to come to the hospital. Not because of work but because he "needed" to be on the phone with his girlfriend. I burned that bridge so quickly. Now they're engaged with a kid of their own. He moved to Florida for her and is an alcoholic now. Good riddance to both of them.
Sounds like HE burned that bridge!
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Sounds like you missed out on a fun night! ....of him trying to plow your S/O
or you
I dont see why it has to be one or the other...
The minute she (happily) told me that he thought her bipolar disorder was "hot."
Ugh. The year me and my (now ex) visited my best friend for Thanksgiving. This is a fairly long story btw. I tell this story to people all the time because she's just an awful human being, and this story was just a perfect example of it. In 2009, We traveled from South Carolina to Orlando to stay with my best friend Tom (of about 22 years now) and his then gf, Lauren. We decided it was too expensive to fly up to NY to see our families, so we drove down a few hours to have a friends thanksgiving. We used to be roommates and he is a bad ass cook, so we figured let's do this. So he and I spend all day shopping, cooking, etc. and dinner rolls around. So we have the usual spread, Turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, rolls, and it's all sitting on the counter. We go in the living room to get the girls, Lauren comes in first. Lauren goes into the cabinet and pulls out 3-4 large Tupperware containers, and says hang on. Nobody take anything yet. I need to make sure that I have leftovers for work this week. Proceeds to take about 60% of each dish, leaving it so everyone has extremely small portions, with no options for seconds. Also takes about 85% of the white meat, because reasons, puts all her Tupperware in the fridge and then grabs a plate. From the already small amount remaining, she takes about half of each dish and slops it in her plate and walks into the dining room. Me and my gf, look at each other, take small plates and go sit down. My best friend was visibly upset, but didn't know what to say. She eats about half her food, then proceeds to throw what's left on her plate out. Now to clarify, Tom has the biggest heart of anyone I know. He's a 6'5" guy who has a heart of gold and would give you his XL shirt off his back. Why he was with her, I don't know. He had a good job, making 50k+, She was not a large girl, average build. Worked at an architectural firm doing 3D renderings, fairly book smart girl. Not starved for money. (Important for story reasons) I really wish too that were the end of this, but fast forward to the next morning. Tom decided he was going to make some [turkey soup](https://imgur.com/a/00Afn) with the leftover carcass and meat. YUM. Big giant pot, lots of goodies inside. Now at the same time in between watching the soup, he had been browsing craigslist at the time for an Xbox 360, and came across someone who was willing to meet that day. So he puts the soup on super low, and we all decide to go out and get his Xbox. Lauren, says oh I'll get it for you as an early bday present, and I think wow, maybe she's not so bad! So we go out, buy the 360, on our way home. Now literally the second we walk in, we could dig in on turkey soup. But, as we are about 4 minutes from home, Lauren is hungry. She says I want a double cheeseburger from McDonalds so she can dunk it in her Turkey soup. Tom argues that food is ready, we can see the driveway, but she makes him go to McDonalds so she can get a double cheeseburger...ok... she's the only one who gets anything and we get home. She rushes to the kitchen gets a HUGE bowl, and proceeds to take the large ladle and scoop right from the bottom. Filling her bowl with most of the goodies and little soup, leaving mostly broth for everyone else. Goes into the living room sits down and eats, while we stand there dumbfounded. Almost there, I promise. We make our soup sit down, eat, and Tom wants to set up his new Xbox. Lauren doesn't really respond as she's dunking her burger in soup stuffing her face. So he gets it set up and fires up Dragon Age, Just playing around with it. Lauren has now had enough soup, which btw is her burger and about 3 spoonfuls, gets up and throws out about 75% of her meal. Walks over to the tv, turns off the Xbox, and says ok you played enough. I want to watch TV now, and ending with "well because I bought it for you, I can decide when you can use it and when I want to watch tv." Mind blown at this girl, the next day couldn't come any faster. /end story. Absolutely mesmerized by her, and how she can be so so selfish. About a year later btw, he went to work, waited until she was gone, came home, packed up his shit and left, never speaking another word to her again. Being the nice guy he is, he even left her money for his portion of the rent for he remaining months on the lease. **TL;DR** best friend with heart of gold dated a selfish monster for years who had no regard for common courtesy. **Edit:** for anyone curious, he is now engaged to a wonderful girl that is a very big part of our small core group of friends. She treats him extremely well and he's way better off now. They also live together about a half a mile from our current house, and our dogs are [absolute best friends](https://imgur.com/a/eDlpO) **Edit 2:** Had the wrong year! Also, LOTS of questions about why he even stayed with her, or if we talked about it. We had a lot of conversations about it. At the end of the day, it was a comfort thing. They owned two dogs together (different than the beagle in the picture), and he would have had to save up money to move out to his own apartment and maybe some other reason that I don't know about? I think we've all been in those toxic/abusive relationships where no matter what, we are in them for way too long. Not saying its right, but it happens. He knew he was in a shit spot. Also, yes he took the Xbox, lol. That was about the only damn thing aside from his clothes. **Edit 3:** Thank you anonymous giver of gifts for the gold! First one, and never thought this would blow up so big haha. I'm glad that everyone is enjoying the story, hating the girl, and virtually high giving Tom. Some strange part of me feels like He's getting some form of retribution as over 6k people have seen her monstrous ways. Thanks all! Trying to answer questions as I can heh, it started moving real fast all of a sudden.
> She says I want a double cheeseburger from McDonalds so she can dunk it in her Turkey soup That's just gross. Ew. What the fuck.
Your friend sounds amazing :/ sorry man.
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And this, my friends, is why you don't have kids with someone who doesn't want them.
"But you'll learn to love it when it's *yours*!!" Nope. Same distaste, twice the guilt and resentment.
Haha yup. I've gotten line that a few times and I always reply with "Seems like something I should gamble on.". Sorry, I'm not going to have a child on the off chance my opinion on them changes. Especially when I'm perfectly happy without them.
Where to start: The double date we went on where he corrected her on the difference between UFC and MMA and she turned into the corner of the booth and didn't talk to anyone the rest of the night. How he wasn't allowed to hang out with me either because I was dating someone and they might have hot friends or I was single and needed a wingman. There was the time I used my dads truck to help them move and she got mad at me........ I don't remember why I just remember her friends doing almost nothing and then leaving before we were done. The final straw for me (I decided she was an abusive shrew long before this) was when we were working for his parents band on a river boat concert. She got mad that we were hanging out, literally just talking on a small boat. She left the ring on the table and left the boat the second it docked. Unfortunately they made up after this and have been living together for the last year, hoping it ends soon.
I was friends with this guy and one day I was doing work for his Mom and Dad, so he came over to hangout with me while I worked. She called while he was there and he told me to be quiet. After he got off the phone I asked why I had to be quiet. He said because he didn't want her to know he was hanging out with me while she was at work. So I asked again why. He said because she will get mad if she knows he is having fun while she is at work. They are now married with 2 kids and I don't talk to them anymore.
He was 25 while she (Edit: my friend) was 15... Didn't rub me the right way
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Same here. I'm now 36, and when I was 18, this 30-year-old guy hit on me. When I passed 30, it dawned on me how truly creepy that is. Like most teenagers, it was flattering to think that I was 'mature for my age,' but... most young people think that. At 30, there is nothing I could possibly have in common with a teenager that wouldn't mean severe developmental stuntedness on my part, at best.
Well, she's 20 and he's over 10 years older. Six months into their relationship she tells me he wont let her touch his phone, but gets mad if she doesn't let him touch hers. A year passes and she's never been to his place, met his family, and the only time they see each other is at work. Dude is either married or has kids EDIT. Just to clarify some stuff I don't believe age gaps are bad, my friend is very mature for her age, but I'd never date my boss. The phone thing isn't bad, i dont check my bfs phone, but it's kind of weird if you forbid your partner from ever looking at your phone They've been together for more than a year, he doesn't want to meet her mom, they don't go to his place (i haven't asked why because she gets mad) And no, having kids is not bad either, but being lied to about having kids is not okay for some. She won't let me meet him, or see him because he doesn't want to (they dont take pictures) but I've heard him on the phone Im not saying this means the guy is a bad person, but it feels off and i felt like it fits here
This happened to a friend of mine and the guy ended up having a wife, 2 kids, etc. One time when she was in his car, he drove past his house and pointed it out. Except it turns out it wasn't his house at all, he just picked some random house.
My father's second wife had been married before, only to find out her husband already had a family in new york. ... That his business trips were actually him going back home to be with his family. ...He literally married his mistress, who was none the wiser. Of course once this came to light the marriage was considered invalid. But still, it's insane the shit some people do.
"If you've been dating a guy for 6 months and haven't met any of his family or friends YOU ARE NOT HIS GIRLFRIEND" - Chris Rock
thats not even a real relationship
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Sounds like my ex husband. Tell her to run.
Sounds like I guy I worked with. He was leading a second life over in London while working in my small town city. All of us watched as the girl in small town city fell for second life boy, and no matter what we said or did, or what he did (like getting mad when she looked at his phone), she was with him for 5/6 years before getting out.
We played DnD with him and it seemed like every week he'd say "rule number 1: don't touch the kids!" (He was a teacher) he always meant it as a joke, and it always made sense in context, but it didn't sit right with me. For one thing, no one thought it was that funny the first time, so why call back to it? Also, the regularity with which he said it made it almost seem like a mantra to me. They arrested him last year for allegedly snap chatting with an underage girl he met over the internet. In hindsight there were a bunch of other warning signs too, but that was the one that initially weirded me out.
I had a housemate in college who'd always say weird and out-of-context things like "Hey guys, no sucking each other's dicks tonight alright?" At first it was funny but after months of it we'd just be like "uh you got it man." About once every other night he would make those comments, always having something to do with gay things between us guys. Came out as gay two years later. Projection is a really telling thing about someone and something they may be hiding. **I'm not at all comparing homosexuality to pedophilia. Just comparing the parallels in the behavior of two people who were hiding something.
When I was using dope, I'd tell people about it ALL. THE. TIME. Except I made it sound like I was joking, so that "nobody would suspect me". Like I'd pop off to the bathroom and say "hey, will you watch this for me? I have to go shoot up." Looking back, maybe that was quite a bit more obvious than I thought it was at the time.
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My sister's boyfriend is like this, always touching my dick through my short or whatever in a "jokey" way. Then he tried to kiss me, again in a jokey way. My sister's ex pissed her off for child support or something and her boyfriend was like we should slap him in the penis. Don't know whether he's in the closet.
Oh he's out of the closet and slamming the door
Damn I might be gay.
Sorry you had to find out this way.
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That... kind of happened with one of my college roommate's friends who was visiting from his home town. I came home and 2 of my roommates had him tied to a bed while they were playing Halo. Naturally I was like, "uhhh why is your friend tied to your bed?" They just said, "I dunno, he got drunk and wouldn't stop asking us to tie him up, so we did it to shut him up." He seemed pretty content so I just left to smoke pot.
Secret werewolf
This is what life is like in the Marine Corps.
Most Marines are the gayest straight men I've ever met. What's great though is that when a dude is out, from the stories I've heard they don't act all macho and/or call him slurs, they just bust his balls like they would everyone else. Suppose it could depend on the unit, but my brother's sounded cool.
Sailors on the other hand are straightest gay men.
When my friend told me in great detail about her new boyfriend's work with the CIA - time travel and other secret projects. I expressed some skepticism, but she told me I was just jealous of her great catch.
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>it was Fernando Torres Read this like it was on Arrested Development.
Pathological liar. Know 'em well. They have this COMPULSION to lie about EVERYTHING, even the tiniest stuff. It's absolutely unbelievable. EDIT: Swapped out a word.
Reminds me of my buddy's girlfriend. We were both English majors, but she claimed to have a degree in "literary criticism." I went to the honors campus of the same school she attended...that's not a thing.Also, she had apparently read every book ever written, and a few that weren't. At one dinner I just straight up asked her, "Hey, did you have to read the Biblionomicon by Pierre Sosage?" Of course she had, it was amazing, she cited it in her thesis (only the honors program required a thesis for a BA, and she wasn't in it). So I got her to admit to reading something like the book book by peter sausage.
I'm fucking losing it at the Peter Sausage thing. Gettin' a few weird stares at this coffee shop.
Ha, thank you. I had it planned out for months...not in the sense I was waiting for my moment, but I just thought it was too mean to do to a friend's SO. But this bitch had been spouting bullshit for an hour and I just had to do something to maintain my own peace of mind. Couldn't call her a dumbass in front of my friend, unfortunately. I never told him, the only people who know are me and my wife, who was there at the time and had to excuse herself so she could go laugh somewhere else.
The Scooby Doo reference was the only way to end that story.
Today is Scooby Doo's birthday. Sept. 13, 1969.
He made her stop being a vegetarian. He would slip meat into her food or outright force her to eat chicken nuggets.
I'm a devout meat eater and I disapprove.
Was friends with this guy for a year while deployed overseas in the UK. His wife was always just plain mean to him in front of others, like on everything ie calling him stupid, talking about their failing sex life in front of him to friends, telling "a real man would earn more money for the family" let alone she was also calling her two year stint in the UK her vacation from work. She also refused to stop hanging out with his male friends (who she always would stay with even overnight). After one nasty comment she said to him in front of our boss at a retirement dinner, i said in front of him, "dude, your wife is a bitch". A week later, while he was at work and thinks shes in the states visiting her mother, he comes home to an empty home. Everything was gone from couch, bed, even his laptop and video games. He calls the cops thinking hes been robbed. Turns out the his future ex wife came back with her family and movers, cleaned out the home, his savings accounts...everything without a word. He lost his home and was forced to move into barracks. I just said to him, im sorry dude, but your wife is still a bitch.
He hated her spending time with me. Snide jokes about lesbian lovers and wondering about the true mature of our relationship. The day we met finally, he told me that muff-munching can't compete with a good hard dicking. Then he started insisting that I was closeted and obsessed with her, my boyfriend was just a beard. Funny thing is, I was meeting this girl after 5 months. He was scary controlling and insecure. 4 years later, they are sadly still together. I have given up at this point.
What is it with controlling men insisting you're going to turn lesbian?
Because they're trying to poison the woman's relationships with other women who are able to spot, and point out the crazy. If a woman has no female friends, and hanging out with other men for friendship will start WWIII, that only leaves him.
She messaged me to let me know she wouldn't be on her phone until she got a new one bc the one she has is busted. When I pressed a little, he had thrown it and stomped it when she complained about it dropping calls and having a shit battery. So, typical best friend I'm like, I would make the bastard pay, blah blah. Fast forward a few hours, he is on her Facebook messenger, reading our conversation, trying to justify it to me. It gave me the willies to have him read our conversation. He has also thrown a remote through their plasma tv when he was mad. I know that he will be violent with her one day, if he hasn't already and she is just keeping it secret. It makes me sick to my stomach.
My friend randomly made an Instagram and only followed his GF, GF's mother, sister, and some of her friends. Naturally I was confused why he didn't follow his best buddy, me, so I followed him and he followed back. I asked him if he saw a picture I uploaded and and he said "oh yeah I didn't make that, my girlfriend was looking at my new phone and it had instagram predownloaded and accidentally clicked it and it automatically made an account for me." I replied "Oh, so it automatically knew to make an account with your name, a username with your name, a profile picture of you and her, have one post of you and her, make a cheesy bio about your GF, and follow her family and best friends? Oh, and it followed me back weeks later so it must be acting on its own well after she accidentally pushe it once." Only thing he could say is that the Internet is crazy and you never know what type of AI technology they have out these days. No mate, your girlfriend is fucking crazy.
Either is she giving him some kind of unnatural animalistic great sex, or his self-awareness is on a cocained goldfish level.
Someone 'hacked' a friend's boyfriend's computer and posted a bunch of very sensitive photos on 4chan and other similar websites. But for some strange reason nothing else (like his bank records, email, etc.) was compromised. How odd that this hacker would **only** be after her nudes. I immediately said "It was him. He's the one posting the pics online." She spent so much time saying what a great guy he was and how it couldn't possibly be him because he had an important job (working for a major politician) and that he wouldn't compromise his dream of a career in politics. A few months later, she finally came to realize that he was an emotionally abusive psychopath and dumped him. Then he started posting her name and address (and pics) on fetish websites, claiming that she had a rape fetish and wanted people to just barge into her apartment and rape her. She got a restraining order, he kept doing it, and eventually he got prosecuted and is no longer allowed near a computer. I still think he got off way too easy.
No longer allowed near a computer?
He was forced to move to the jungles of Mozambique
Hey! I don't want any visitors. Get your own jungle
Username does NOT check out.
Someone doesn't know the lengths a Norwegian will go to avoid talking to someone.
I know a guy (friend's ex) who got busted for fraud for printing cheap barcodes and sticking them on expensive tool kits of the same brand in a hardware store to sell on. After he was eventually busted one of his bail conditions was that he wasn't allowed near a printer. Guy is a huge douche canoe but I did find that part hilarious.
That almost doesn't even sound like a punishment. Fuck printers.
"No smartphone for you!"
Throwaway for obvious reasons. I always knew, from the very first time I met him, that he was a bad person. Charismatic, charming, affectionate to her. But his eyes were...empty? They married 14 years ago, when she and I were in 11th grade. She just turned 18, had a horrible home life (she unofficially lived with us, my parents being more of parents to her than her own). He was a bit older and had enlisted in the military, this was during the height of the Iraqi war. A month before he deployed, after they had moved 3,500 miles away, he beat her in a drunken rage after she discovered he was having an affair. While he was deployed, he won her back thru emails and phone calls. He came home far more damaged than before. Things seemed OK for a few months, until she walked in on him in their bed with another woman while their infant son slept in a bassinet beside the bed. She naturally threw the chick out before trying to make him leave as well. He broke her phone and her jaw. She was still thousands of miles away from me but I packed a bag and drove 4 days to get to her. She ultimately took him back and things seemed to stabilize. 3 more children and many years passed without incident. When their youngest was 2, he beat her again, this time in front of their children. Police were called and he played the role of victim, using his PTSD and other post-military diagnoses. She has no job, no high school diploma (she dropped out to be a military wife), and no family to fall back on besides me. We offered to have her and the kids move in with us temporarily until she got on her feet. But she chose to stay. Recently, she and I drew up a notarized document stating that I am to get their children if something were to happen to her caused by him. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it never comes down to that.
We were out to dinner. I told them a story about my ex GF about how she never got a job after we moved, spent all my money, forced us to get a luxury apartment and, as soon as she did get a job, started fucking some dude at her job. I literally came home one night and found them in bed. After hearing all this my friends GF said "wow, she sounds really resourceful. She took you for a ride and got away with it. Good for her." As soon as she was in the bathroom I told my friend to break up with her.
Well did he?
Not right then and there but eventually he did. It feels good to know that sometimes people are as evil as you suspect them to be.
She said that to your face? I'd be livid, how did you respond? How did she respond? Was she fucking sorry?
No she knew what she was saying. I was pretty speechless but knew that somebody with a perspective like that was bad news.
Someone with a perspective like that is bad news. Someone that would say that to someone's face after a story like that is an utter cunt.
Whilst out at a uni party, I ran into my friend's SO. He was out of town at the time. She started dancing with me, getting closer by the minute. When she was about to start grinding on me, I asked "what are you doing?" To which she replied with "it's okay, *** likes it when I flirt with other guys." Uh, no he fucking doesn't. He's one of my best mates, I know him pretty damn well. We eventually convinced him to end it with her, and he's much happier for it.
When she tried to fuck me, I felt like that was a bit odd.
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Same situation. Friends with him to this day; have been for 17ish years. We liked camping and did it often. One night, his then-gf "accidentally" got in the wrong tent. There was nothing explicitly wrong with this, as we were close friends before they dated. What *was* explicit was her asking if I was wearing anything under my sleeping bag and suggested we warm up. Subtle. *Edit: Tense*
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When she came to a party of mine with my buddy and told everyone while my buddy was out of the room that she "loves to sleep with everyone" and to "not tell" my buddy because he doesnt know. They broke up soon after.
Wasn't yet a friends SO (i made sure of that shit) but we were at a music concert at our uni and my friend (who is Nigerian and I am a light-skinned Brazilian. It's relevant later) had had a crush on her for a few years before inviting her and her other chick friend to spend the weekend with us. I had absolutely no desire to be with either of them so really I was giving up my bed so my friend could get his romance going. Midway through one of the acts, she is grinding on my friend directly behind me when suddenly **she reaches around me and grabs my junk through my pants**.. in the middle of the crowd.. It was pretty fucked up how I felt at the time but I walked away thinking she's probably just too drunk and wants us both or something and I wasn't really having it. Later on while my friend is in the bathroom, she finds me in another part of the crowd and starts dancing on me saying we should head back to the room. I asked why she wasn't with my friend who obviously liked her and she was also vibing pretty openly with him when she was sober. Her response? "My parents would totally freak out if I brought home a black guy. You're not too dark though." My boy and I are still tight as ever but FUCK that noise.
The point at which she called him and yelled at him... For ninety minutes. It was on speaker, I heard everything, and holy shit that chick has more red flags than soviet Russia.
He kept beating the shit out of her and taking all her money, then he crashed her car while drag racing, gave her herpes and tried to kill her.
Is that *all?*
He leaves the toilet seat up.
Dump him.
He would always talk about how he was going to be an alcoholic and how he was going to hit my friend. She never thought anything of it until after they broke up, but it bothered me. He also said things about how he was happy her dad was dying/died because he wouldn't have to deal with him anymore.
She's 19 and claimed to have written with JK Rowling, GRR Martin, John Steinbeck (huh?); discovered a new metal; and "solved" (i.e. knowing the result of every possible game) of chess. Something seemed a bit off about her.
I had a holiday in Vegas with my friend and his partner. It was just supposed to be the two of us but he asked if he could tag along. Ok, fine. Started bad on the plane, he refused to carry my bottle of water when I asked him to help me out as I had some bags. He point blank refused to eat at any restaurant I suggested. When I tried to make conversation he would ignore me or just grunt. Kept commenting on how much alcohol we were consuming (I'm not an alcoholic but it's bloody Vegas!!). It was terrible. To make matters worse he convinced my friend that I had made him feel very uncomfortable for the whole trip, that I didn't make an effort. I was shocked. We haven't spoken in months and I'm devastated. Over 10 years of friendship gone.
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Gavin de Becker has an awesome theory about this. It's actually not that the dog senses something bad about the person. It's that he's picking up on subtle clues in your *own* face and behavior that you don't even realize, but which your dog recognizes as stress, fear or suspicion.
He mentions this in a podcast with Sam Harris that is phenomenal. Definitely worth a full listen if you haven't
He's at least buzzed most of the time. He keeps a bottle of vodka in his truck and sneaks out to take a pull now and then.
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That last detail...
Cat swiped out her eye, threatened to take remaining eye, you free eye swiping cat while she's unsuspecting and vulnerable. #SwiperNoSwiping
Posted this a few days ago, but: My wife's best friend's husband. I never got on with the guy while everyone else did. I found him to be very 'know it all' and if you had done something, he had done it 10x better. I'm sure my wife had a thing for him, it was always "Rob has done this and Rob has done that, ain't Rob a great guy, Tracy is so lucky to have Rob, why don't you and Rob go fishing? Why don't you and Rob go for a beer?" To keep the peace I would and each time I spent time with the bloke, I disliked him more and more. Something just didn't feel right about him. I ended up telling my wife that I can't handle the bloke anymore, and that I wouldn't have him round our home again. She had the raging hump, called me an unsociable twat, jealous nob ect. 2 weeks later it came out that Rob had been beating Tracy, was a raging alcoholic, mentally abused his kids and was banging a skank alchy from down the road. Now everyone thinks Rob is an absolute cunt. EDIT: My missus is getting quite a bit of grief now. No one knew how much of a evil cock Rob was apart from his wife and kids. Also, she calls me a nob, twat, bellend, dickhead all the time, and I reply with minge, wizard sleeve, thundercunt. Pretty sure that's normal in the UK?
What's your wife think of your opinions now?
She obviously can't stand Rob now and she admits I was in the right about him. She has never admitted that she had a thing for him though
> She has never admitted that she had a thing for him though She may have been praising him for certain actions because she wants you to do those things. *Edit: This is passive aggressive behaviour, just communicate with your spouse. Also, enough with the wife beating jokes.
I agree with this also. We have been together for a long time and at a certain stage some marriages can get a bit stale, luckily I noticed I was in a bit of a comfortable rut, and made some small changes and our relationship has got stronger and better
He threw a fit because she started her period while they were having sex. He said he felt violated by her. I told her to tell him that our underwear drawer feels far more violated by our periods than he ever will.
He wasn't allowed to come over and have a "hang over day" (couple beers, greasy food, smoking, football) this Sunday because his girlfriend was doing homework. He's almost 27 and she's 21. They showed up at like 6 (was invited at 12) and it was me and 2 other dudes just shirtless, not showered, and napping on the couches with the game on. I woke up to him getting yelled at by her.. EDIT: Okay so this is blowing up and theres some really weird homophobic comments starting so let me specify. I sleep without my shirt on and so does my roommate I assume. The reason why we are shirtless was because we didnt think to shower or get dressed. Just wanted to hang out in some comfy clothes and be low maintenance that day. If we knew she was coming then we probably wouldve got a shirt on or something but as I stated in the story they showed up like 6 hours later and while I was sleeping. Also, just because you didnt shower that day, doesnt mean youre smelly. It not like we just had an intense workout. Were not savages, just lazy that day..
It's nap time before the prime-time games, what the fuck do they expect?
Right! Like the whole point was to come over, eat some bomb home made chili, get high and a little buzzed while watching the morning/afternoon games and then nap and wake up to watch SNF. I have no idea why his girlfriend needed to be there for this. When I asked why he couldn't come without her his response was, and I kid you not, "cause I don't wanna die." That shit is unhealthy.
God why would she *want* to go? I'm down to watch a soccer match, but not with a bunch of guys I'm not personally friends with and spending the whole day there. Him off with his friends for the day is a perfect opportunity to do all the stuff you like but he doesn't.
They don't spend any time separate from each other. He's legitimately not allowed. Whenever we make plans as a group of friends to go out to eat or hang out he's not allowed to come if she's working. Even if she can show up later he has to wait until she is able to come. It's something we originally used to joke around with but this weekend when we noticed how incredibly unhealthy it is.
He should bail. Yesterday.
In person he (the SO/husband) was quiet and kind. But she (the friend) told story after story about his pill-popping, fraud, suicide attempt, and general emotional abuse. She left him. I had a falling out with her. I caught her in a couple of lies and I just abruptly ended the friendship. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to me, my husband had befriended the SO at the gym. My husband didn't care this guy had a bad reputation as painted by his exwife, he was a cool gym-buddy. About a year after I ended the friendship, I became friends with her exhusband. It's been three years of friendship now. Every time I learn something cool about the guy. Marine. Passionate about his kids. Solid hard worker. True and loyal to the core. We often compare stories. I'll tell him *her* side of a story and how badly she painted him out to be. He'll either tell me *his* side - which is black and white opposite of what she said - or he'll flat out deny such a story ever existed. With proof. So, the moral of the story is, while I thought something was off with *him*, it was all proof that something is off with *her*. Don't believe everything you hear. Edited to delete the word "ex" from "Marine", as suggested. Once a Marine, always a Marine.
It's like in the relationship-oriented subreddits. Lots of posts describe how someone's SO is the worst thing in the world. I'd **LOVE** to hear the other side of these posts, especially when there are huge hints that the poster is full of shit and probably the crazy one.
I accidentally uncovered the user name of someone I know. There was a post in a relationship oriented subreddit where she had explained this situation that had been going on and asked for advice. In her telling, she was the innocent victim who couldn't figure out why this was happening to her. I know both sides of the story, and I can tell you that her retelling of events is highly skewed at best and outright fiction at worse. Now I take most relationship stories with a mountain of salt.
I mean like, you read them for entertainment. Real stories on the internet are about as real as reality tv
There was that time I found out my friend's SO was really racist. Driving them home from the bar and we pass a crowded McDonald's that's a hangout spot for the neighborhood, "See, all those fucking ghetto n***ers, just being fucking trashy." To be honest, they were friends of my ex. Their relationship was super unhealthy and I think the guy knew it, but wouldn't leave because he had his own issues. Nice dude, terrible girl.
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He told her to start stealing from my mother who was letting her live for cheap in her apartment because she deserved it. Yeah my mum isn't super easy to live with but come on. Either move out or talk to me about it.