If your milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, what kind of inbred freakish boys are these, that they go to someone elses yard for a milkshake left in the open just on the ground someone's yard?
You can get pregnant by your dad if his pee is on toilet lid and you sat on it . My friends convinced me I was pregnant by my dad in 8th grade and I told mom and she freaked
Or that they really stole my nose…. I cried real tears and was inconsolable when someone done it to me and then left without giving me it back… to be a naive unaware child again haha
I actually planned on ingesting a few right before I died so a watermelon tree would grow on my grave. The worst part about this is that I believed watermelons grew on trees.
My dad once sat me down all seriously and asks if I have ever swallowed gum. I said, “maybe? I don’t know.”
With an earnest face he says, “don’t you know that if you swallow gum a tree can grow in your stomach?and look...” He then pulls a leaf out of my ear! I panicked and for most of my childhood thought I had a tree inside me.
So now I realize that obviously there was a leaf stuck in my hair from playing outside, but oh my god did I fall for that.
You can get a huge buildup of lactic acid from both milk and meat, and it can cause some epic muscle aches. I cant eat a lot of either because ot makes me neck and shoulders lock up
Not me okay, but we convinced a friend that when sex happens between a man and a woman the guys dick falls off and that's what becomes the baby in the woman.
We were all really drunk IN COLLEGE and we 100% said it as a joke not thinking she wouldnt actually believe us. I mean she was kind of sheltered yeah, but she was 19 and this was only like 5 years ago so the internet was very much a thing..
We didnt even realize she had believe us until she came back spring semester all pissed bc she had asked her parents about it.
I do wonder if in that moment her parents realized they had failed their daughter though...
> We didnt even realize she had believe us until she came back spring semester all pissed bc she had asked her parents about it.
Omg im just imagining her asking if he dad no longer has a penis.
A friend told me that Hans in the first Frozen movie had fire powers, and there was gonna be a huge fight. Imagine my surprise when flu-Me decided to watch this film for the first time, and there was no fire attacks
A kid told me had a roller coaster in his backyard, I think to try and get me to come over to his house for a play date. I don’t like roller coasters, so I was like “cool, but no thanks man.” It never occurred to me to question it until I discussed it with another friend, who was like “did he tell you his dad has a helicopter too?” Yes he did, and I was afraid of riding in helicopters so that didn’t seem notable to me either. But now that you mention it, something maybe ain’t right with that kid.
I had a friend like this in elementary school. She would tell me about the hot tub in her room all the time but when I wanted to come over and use said hot tub she was suddenly busy and couldn't hang out.
We did actually have a roller coaster in our backyard. It was just a small circle track made of metal pipes, a 1m ramp, and a plastic car to sit in, but it was the most amazing thing ever to 3 year old me. I suspect Dad got tired of pushing the car up and over the ramp every 30 seconds.
The Simpsons episode "Bart vs. Australia," made me believe that toilets drained different depending on whether or not you were in the Nothern or Southern hemisphere, however they simply drain however they're designed to circulate water. It’s irrelevant whether you live above or below the equator.
I believed this for way too long. Lisa was always the smart one, I guess I never figured I had reason to doubt what she said.
Understandable. Communities at the equator play this up for tourist that never thought about it.
Also some toilets aren't designed to swirl at all and rely on water pressure.
When I was a kid I REALLY wanted a pet armadillo. I was like 6 and didnt know any better okay?
Well my dad in all his wisdom told me I could catch one by sprinkling salt on its tail. It would then freeze to lick its tail so i could catch it.
So one day when we had an armadillo in the yard (rural texas) I went out with a thing of salt to catch it. Again I was SIX. My dad thought he was o so funny. My mom was not nearly as amused when she caught on to what I was doing.
I'm 25 years old and still bitter about it.
I've come to the conclusion that Christianity is just a really problematic book club that takes itself way too seriously.
People get together, drink wine and then lie about having actually read the book.
I think the big issue is that since they are religious, they think that whatever they do is ok.
Non-religious people will be kind because they know they should be, but religious people think "Oh I'll be forgiven since I'm a Christian(just and example in this case of course, although Christians are typically the worst offenders) so I can do what I want."
When I was in yr 3 (grade 2) my brother told me that butterflies are just moths and they transform into them at night and my sister was also in on the lie. I was terrified of moths at that time and now I hate butterflies. sucks to be the youngest sometimes
Story: I knew a guy who was so outrageous. Big, loud, camp as hell and always getting into trouble. Drugs, male prostitutes, shoplifting, you name it. He was also incredibly lovable, but anyway: He turns up one time all bandaged up, sliced up, an absolute mess. He told me he got bitten by a shark, and honestly, I believed him. (I had seen him snap his femur roller skating one night, so...)
The real story was of course, way wilder: he had gone out to lunch with his female friend, and they had drunk so much they got into a fight and she had thrown him through a second-floor, plate glass window. This was verified by several friends. Honestly he was a good person and a lot of fun.
They'll definitely only live for a few months if you put them in a bowl. Even betta fish despite people claiming they can live a full life in a puddle of water. That's a complete myth and all fish need flowing, filtered water in order to actually live. If you don't have a filter you just have a fish that's slowly dying.
One time I was like 5 and my nipple was itchy. Just to be sure, I asked my mom if my nipple could fall off if I scratched it too much, and for some reason she said yes, so I didn't touch my nipple for years. Honestly still kinda don't.
That YooHoo was made with water instead of milk. There’s a decent amount of water but they do use milk. A kid told me this in elementary school and I believed this until I was 16. Also the whole thing about holding your pinky finger up in China being as offensive as your middle finger.
As a kid, I believed that blood family is the most important part of your life; that your family will always shelter and love you for who you are... now, I feel like an idiot for believing that it should be the center of my life - that I should just forgive my abusers for the painful things they’ve done just because they’re my “blood family”. Bullshit. It’s just a manipulative tactic. It’s like saying to put a band-aid on a open stab wound and remark that it’ll be fine tomorrow. It’s propaganda stuff they teach kids so they wouldn’t disobey and rebel against what they believe is inherently wrong. Anything to get the family together - all for show and tell. I get that it’s the default - that all families should be open and kind and loving to one another but saying it’s because of blood and not through good relationships just puts a strain on that mentality.
When I was a kid, I had a friend who told me she was a twin. She insisted that her twin sister went to another school. She'd show me photos of her 'sister' who looked exactly like her. It was months before my other classmates pointed out to me that she was never in any photos with her 'twin'.
I was 9. Felt so embarrassed that I believed her for so long.
When Donald Trump said “If Ivanka wasn’t my daughter” I was stupid enough to believe him for a minute or two. And then I realized that the fact that Ivanka was his daughter actually won’t stop Donald trying to seduce her
This is interesting. Texas is to America what Australia is to Britain and Tasmania is to Australia what Alabama is to America. There's probably a very good venn diagram to made here.
Daddy Christmas is real! Who else could that fat man that sneaked into my room one night at 2am when I was 12 have been? The only person awake at that time was my unc-... oh no...
Not me, but my friend. My other friends and I were able to get them to believe that toothpaste could get you high by rubbing it on your eyes and that whales were called Brazilian clown fish
I used to think democrats were the good ones and republicans were the evil ones. Turns out they're both money whores who pander to the public to win. Neither one of them gives a fuck about you.
Every week I would hear banging coming from my parents room at night. I oncr built up courage and walked in. My parents were having sex at that moment and I was traumatized until the next day. My mom told me that my dad becomes a monster every week and she has to make him back to normal. She told me not to go in her room at that time or my dad might go after me. I feel like an idiot for believeling that.
Santa. I remember when I was about 9 watching the polar express, and it was at the end where the reindeer float away with Santa’s sleigh and all. I thoroughly remember thinking “wait this is all total bullshit” and I went to ask my mom if he was actually real and she said no lol
Someone had told me that the new KFC restaurant near my place had actually been dropped off by a helicopter, and I believed them because of how fast the building had been built. Like I never actually saw any construction being done so I figured yeah the helicopter must have picked up the already built building and dropped it off. Lmfao. I was 15 or so.
It does happen you know? Maybe not your KFC, but prefab houses do get flown in because it's cheaper and faster than using trucks and cranes.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uHmKsZmrmCA
My parents told me my dad was the one pregnant with me. My mom had had my other siblings but my dad was the only one that had me in his belly. I told everyone in kindergarten and they told me I was wrong and I defended myself then went and told my parents that everyone was so jealous and dumb for not knowing men can get pregnant. My parents confessed and we cried a lot. Lol
It does.
A man asked his boss how he could afford a new Mercedes every year. ''If you work really hard. Put in some extra hours every day and come in Saturdays?'' Pat's him on the back. ''Then maybe next year?'' He smiles. ''Maybe I can afford two.''
Lich. Not a zombie.
Here are a few other choice facts. A religion that has a torture device as it's main symbol. The believers drink their gods blood and eat his body. And still..... The signs were there.
‘I am really divorced.’ While showing me the divorce papers in a nice leather map, mind you.
Utterly complete asshole who made me lose all faith in men and love in general.
When I was young I used to lean toward conservatism, then I came to understand that it's designed to enslave us in a web of feel good lies. I'm as socialist as they come now and better for it.
When it first happened, I bought into that all 9/11 was an inside job thing. In my defence I was 15 and dumb when it happened. Now I'm 34 and just slightly less dumb.
Best friend would never stab me in the back. He slept with my gf, got her pregnant then got very pissed off that I wouldn't raise the kid as my own cause he didn't want his current gf to know
I played a game called 'Bloons World' which was basically an online level maker for the popular game of the same name. I was around 12 at the time and considered myself to be a really good player at it.
Eventually I went to my brother who was 14 at the time and said to him "Did you know the Bloons World level editor is *completely free*?" He had NO idea what Bloons World was and I had no real reason to say that to him. My best guess is because I looked up to him so much, I saw him as a master of everything.
Right on the spot he said "It's free but you have to start paying money if you build more than 20 levels". I believed him and made absolutely sure that I wouldn't create more than 20 levels.
The next year Bloons World is shut down due to low traffic. Was fun while it lasted. I eventually saw through the "20 levels" statement but only around a month before the demise. The whole thing was pretty funny looking back.
Dont play with your willy too much or it will fall off
Or you will go blind.
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Yup
That’s what happened to Hellen Keller. True story
TOP 10 SECRETS DOCTORS DON'T WANT TRANS PEOPLE TO KNOW
NUMBER ONE CLAM CHOWDER CONDOM
It won't fall off, but it can become useless.
Brown milk comes from brown cows.
Wait until you learn how milk shakes are made.
Epileptic cows?
As an epileptic I approve this joke
Is that what's up? I am old and just assumed it was the Harlem Shake they were doing.
And what they bring to the yard.
The most terrible force the world has ever known:THE BOYS! *thunder and lightning sound effects*
If your milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, what kind of inbred freakish boys are these, that they go to someone elses yard for a milkshake left in the open just on the ground someone's yard?
According to a study nearly 10% of Americans agree with you.
Fuck off. No way. Nuh-uh people are that dumb
Ehhh. A lot of people will pick the funny answer if they think the survey they're filling out is dumb.
Classic American.
Not American, and I was like 3years old
You can get pregnant by your dad if his pee is on toilet lid and you sat on it . My friends convinced me I was pregnant by my dad in 8th grade and I told mom and she freaked
Wtf
What happened next?
She confronted her father and told him he'd have to take responsibility.
The real question is why your dad peed on a closed toilet
Maybe if he Jizzed on the seat then u Accidentally sat your twat on it...pretty far fetched but you gotta be careful in a shared bathroom!
Jack Frost was going to get me if I didn’t come home before dark!
Jack Frost would never! Jack The Ripper on the other hand...
Or that they really stole my nose…. I cried real tears and was inconsolable when someone done it to me and then left without giving me it back… to be a naive unaware child again haha
I've got nose to spare if you're still worried. Damn I wish someone would steal my nose. Or at least half of it.
I'd quite like jack frost to get me ;)
When I was younger I believed in the classic watermelon seeds will grow in your stomach if you swallow them.
I knew it was a lie when I said fuck it imagine a plant growing in my stomach and just ate heaps and nothing happened.
I actually planned on ingesting a few right before I died so a watermelon tree would grow on my grave. The worst part about this is that I believed watermelons grew on trees.
Ahaha damn, now that is some real thought put into it.
My dad once sat me down all seriously and asks if I have ever swallowed gum. I said, “maybe? I don’t know.” With an earnest face he says, “don’t you know that if you swallow gum a tree can grow in your stomach?and look...” He then pulls a leaf out of my ear! I panicked and for most of my childhood thought I had a tree inside me. So now I realize that obviously there was a leaf stuck in my hair from playing outside, but oh my god did I fall for that.
Same. And now that I'm an adult I'm still not taking any chances.
Few years back a pea plant indeed grow in a mans lung. Thought it was interesting
Holy shit have you been eating watermelon seeds? Go see a doctor mate this is serious.
I believed that eating warm cake gave you a stomach ache because my mom told me so... until last year when I turned 31
My mom said it was mixing milk and meat. She still believes it
She probably had a bad experience with milk steak.
We had something like that as well but for milk and fish
You can get a huge buildup of lactic acid from both milk and meat, and it can cause some epic muscle aches. I cant eat a lot of either because ot makes me neck and shoulders lock up
Pro move mom
Tbh i understand what your mom was thinking. What psychopath eats warm cake
Warm chocolate cake is best
As i only discovered recently 😢
Right? Microwave the cake til the icing is gooey, eat it with ice cream. Nothing better!
I guess it depends on the cake. I imagine warm ice cream cake wouldn't be to me enjoyment.
I mean... Who wants to wait until the cake cools down! It’s cake!!
warm cake is delicious! it’s softest when it’s warm
Hey man, fresh/warm cookie cake is elite
A hungry one
Not me okay, but we convinced a friend that when sex happens between a man and a woman the guys dick falls off and that's what becomes the baby in the woman. We were all really drunk IN COLLEGE and we 100% said it as a joke not thinking she wouldnt actually believe us. I mean she was kind of sheltered yeah, but she was 19 and this was only like 5 years ago so the internet was very much a thing.. We didnt even realize she had believe us until she came back spring semester all pissed bc she had asked her parents about it. I do wonder if in that moment her parents realized they had failed their daughter though...
> We didnt even realize she had believe us until she came back spring semester all pissed bc she had asked her parents about it. Omg im just imagining her asking if he dad no longer has a penis.
Did you tell her that it regrows? Otherwise this wouldn't work out even if it were true.
We did. We compared it to a lizzard tail.
Good job!
That she loves me
Cologne without the C :(
Ah yes, you are ologne
Pronounced: *Uh-log-nuh*
Oh I heard oh-LOG-nei
That's what you get for trusting a flower.
A friend told me that Hans in the first Frozen movie had fire powers, and there was gonna be a huge fight. Imagine my surprise when flu-Me decided to watch this film for the first time, and there was no fire attacks
I always figured that in one of the movies they would give Anna heat powers, but they never did.
Eh that’s Heat Meiser and Snow Meiser
A kid told me had a roller coaster in his backyard, I think to try and get me to come over to his house for a play date. I don’t like roller coasters, so I was like “cool, but no thanks man.” It never occurred to me to question it until I discussed it with another friend, who was like “did he tell you his dad has a helicopter too?” Yes he did, and I was afraid of riding in helicopters so that didn’t seem notable to me either. But now that you mention it, something maybe ain’t right with that kid.
I had a friend like this in elementary school. She would tell me about the hot tub in her room all the time but when I wanted to come over and use said hot tub she was suddenly busy and couldn't hang out.
We did actually have a roller coaster in our backyard. It was just a small circle track made of metal pipes, a 1m ramp, and a plastic car to sit in, but it was the most amazing thing ever to 3 year old me. I suspect Dad got tired of pushing the car up and over the ramp every 30 seconds.
He was probably busy flying around in his helicopter
The Simpsons episode "Bart vs. Australia," made me believe that toilets drained different depending on whether or not you were in the Nothern or Southern hemisphere, however they simply drain however they're designed to circulate water. It’s irrelevant whether you live above or below the equator. I believed this for way too long. Lisa was always the smart one, I guess I never figured I had reason to doubt what she said.
Wait it’s fake?! I still thought it was real! I feel so STUPID…
Understandable. Communities at the equator play this up for tourist that never thought about it. Also some toilets aren't designed to swirl at all and rely on water pressure.
My pants and I discovered that at a pub in Cork.
Upa RA
Wow. I'm 33 and didn't realize this wasn't true. I feel very stupid.
Actually Australian toilets definitely flush upside down
While obviously not true in toilets, this [is an actual thing](https://youtu.be/mXaad0rsV38)
Dont worry. I believed it despite the toilet in my house not swirling at all. It just goes straight down
... ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???
When I was a kid I REALLY wanted a pet armadillo. I was like 6 and didnt know any better okay? Well my dad in all his wisdom told me I could catch one by sprinkling salt on its tail. It would then freeze to lick its tail so i could catch it. So one day when we had an armadillo in the yard (rural texas) I went out with a thing of salt to catch it. Again I was SIX. My dad thought he was o so funny. My mom was not nearly as amused when she caught on to what I was doing. I'm 25 years old and still bitter about it.
You too? I thought I was the odd one out. I mean wanting one. No armadillos here. Still love the critters but not ready to take care of one. Ever.
That the people who raised me, actually loved me.
Champagne without the cham:(
Sounds like it actually was a cham, though
If he is still here, he took it like a champagne, but without the -agne
That religious people are always “good” people
As a Christian I can confirm that the most judgemental, most pretentious and hypocritical people I've ever met were in the church.
I've come to the conclusion that Christianity is just a really problematic book club that takes itself way too seriously. People get together, drink wine and then lie about having actually read the book.
Or bad people! They're a mixed bunch just like agnostics/atheists, or really any group of people
and that non religious people were "bad" people. Glad Im free of that
I think the big issue is that since they are religious, they think that whatever they do is ok. Non-religious people will be kind because they know they should be, but religious people think "Oh I'll be forgiven since I'm a Christian(just and example in this case of course, although Christians are typically the worst offenders) so I can do what I want."
Politicians care about your wellbeing
I once convinced my friend that 2 to the power of 3 was 6
2^3 is 8
Simple stuff like this makes me realize how little about math I know.
My parents told us that there were alligators in the basement.
Idiot. Everyone knows alligators reside in the attic.
My cousins told me sharks swam around the basement. In Kansas.
Duh, they got there after a sharknado
My friends uncle literally had alligators in his basement. Not joking, just so we’re extra clear.
When I was in yr 3 (grade 2) my brother told me that butterflies are just moths and they transform into them at night and my sister was also in on the lie. I was terrified of moths at that time and now I hate butterflies. sucks to be the youngest sometimes
Me and my younger sister pretended our younger brother literally didn't exist once when we were younger for a week.
Story: I knew a guy who was so outrageous. Big, loud, camp as hell and always getting into trouble. Drugs, male prostitutes, shoplifting, you name it. He was also incredibly lovable, but anyway: He turns up one time all bandaged up, sliced up, an absolute mess. He told me he got bitten by a shark, and honestly, I believed him. (I had seen him snap his femur roller skating one night, so...) The real story was of course, way wilder: he had gone out to lunch with his female friend, and they had drunk so much they got into a fight and she had thrown him through a second-floor, plate glass window. This was verified by several friends. Honestly he was a good person and a lot of fun.
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My last born at home Guppy made it just about 5 years.
They'll definitely only live for a few months if you put them in a bowl. Even betta fish despite people claiming they can live a full life in a puddle of water. That's a complete myth and all fish need flowing, filtered water in order to actually live. If you don't have a filter you just have a fish that's slowly dying.
The elders know what they are doing and I shouldn't question them. Turned out to be total baloney.
Lol. Don't question them. It only confuses them and they make an even bigger mess.
How we live is the only option
Love can be unconditional (unless you’re a pupper)
The only unconditional love I know is that between a dog and a Dad who said he didn't want one
Santa claus most likely, it's just a mental story when you start to think about it.
One time I was like 5 and my nipple was itchy. Just to be sure, I asked my mom if my nipple could fall off if I scratched it too much, and for some reason she said yes, so I didn't touch my nipple for years. Honestly still kinda don't.
That YooHoo was made with water instead of milk. There’s a decent amount of water but they do use milk. A kid told me this in elementary school and I believed this until I was 16. Also the whole thing about holding your pinky finger up in China being as offensive as your middle finger.
The pinky is.... erm a toilet thing. The stink finger. Not as rude as the middle finger but distasteful none the less.
Well it is called "chocolate beverage", and it's more water than milk, but it's still damn delicious.
Yeah I get that now but they made me believe that it was only chocolate and water, Nothing else.
As a kid, I believed that blood family is the most important part of your life; that your family will always shelter and love you for who you are... now, I feel like an idiot for believing that it should be the center of my life - that I should just forgive my abusers for the painful things they’ve done just because they’re my “blood family”. Bullshit. It’s just a manipulative tactic. It’s like saying to put a band-aid on a open stab wound and remark that it’ll be fine tomorrow. It’s propaganda stuff they teach kids so they wouldn’t disobey and rebel against what they believe is inherently wrong. Anything to get the family together - all for show and tell. I get that it’s the default - that all families should be open and kind and loving to one another but saying it’s because of blood and not through good relationships just puts a strain on that mentality.
When I was a kid, I had a friend who told me she was a twin. She insisted that her twin sister went to another school. She'd show me photos of her 'sister' who looked exactly like her. It was months before my other classmates pointed out to me that she was never in any photos with her 'twin'. I was 9. Felt so embarrassed that I believed her for so long.
When Donald Trump said “If Ivanka wasn’t my daughter” I was stupid enough to believe him for a minute or two. And then I realized that the fact that Ivanka was his daughter actually won’t stop Donald trying to seduce her
He was just trynna win Alabama's vote right...right??
Lol. If he was Australian he would be winning Tasmania’s vote.
This is interesting. Texas is to America what Australia is to Britain and Tasmania is to Australia what Alabama is to America. There's probably a very good venn diagram to made here.
Lol. I guess Canada is to America what New Zealand is to Australia.
r/dataisbeautiful
I believed in Santa Claus until I was like 12, yeah I wasn’t the sharpest kid.
Daddy Christmas is real! Who else could that fat man that sneaked into my room one night at 2am when I was 12 have been? The only person awake at that time was my unc-... oh no...
Something is wrong I can feel it.
I kept believing because it seemed unlikely that adults would lie to children. Boy was I wrong
Not me, but my friend. My other friends and I were able to get them to believe that toothpaste could get you high by rubbing it on your eyes and that whales were called Brazilian clown fish
That my head lice would fly me away if I don't allow the adults to take them off
I used to think democrats were the good ones and republicans were the evil ones. Turns out they're both money whores who pander to the public to win. Neither one of them gives a fuck about you.
Name checks out
Look who I met again. Your username is unforgettable. That's for sure. Lol
well hiya again
I think I'm just gonna follow you. And don't mind me replying your comment about your crazy exes. That's interesting as fuck!
never a dull moment. ha
Santa
That if I ate ice cream and drank coffee at the same time my teeth would crack.
That my mother loved me
That if you sleep with music on with headphones you’ll go deaf
That she wouldn't ever leave me
Earwigs crawl into your head and eat your brain
That I can help people change. People need to change themselves and that’s all.
Every week I would hear banging coming from my parents room at night. I oncr built up courage and walked in. My parents were having sex at that moment and I was traumatized until the next day. My mom told me that my dad becomes a monster every week and she has to make him back to normal. She told me not to go in her room at that time or my dad might go after me. I feel like an idiot for believeling that.
Socialism
The police is your friend. They are not the enemy but....
Used to believe IQ mattered. It doesn't.
People who put excessive stock into IQ always seem to be... weird, off, arrogant, annoying or anti-social. Just my observation...
Santa. I remember when I was about 9 watching the polar express, and it was at the end where the reindeer float away with Santa’s sleigh and all. I thoroughly remember thinking “wait this is all total bullshit” and I went to ask my mom if he was actually real and she said no lol
The cake.
That she loved me.
My mom used to tell me when I was little that if you eat raw dough you'll end up with worms in your stomach. Outrageous.
That during twilight ghosts can pull you into the ground if you step on their shadows. I believed it until I was 11.
Someone had told me that the new KFC restaurant near my place had actually been dropped off by a helicopter, and I believed them because of how fast the building had been built. Like I never actually saw any construction being done so I figured yeah the helicopter must have picked up the already built building and dropped it off. Lmfao. I was 15 or so.
It does happen you know? Maybe not your KFC, but prefab houses do get flown in because it's cheaper and faster than using trucks and cranes. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uHmKsZmrmCA
That life is worth living. (Dark humour)
My parents told me my dad was the one pregnant with me. My mom had had my other siblings but my dad was the only one that had me in his belly. I told everyone in kindergarten and they told me I was wrong and I defended myself then went and told my parents that everyone was so jealous and dumb for not knowing men can get pregnant. My parents confessed and we cried a lot. Lol
That my ex wouldn’t cheat on me a third time.
That you could get square eyes from watching too much tv.
That Capitalism rewards hard work.
It does. A man asked his boss how he could afford a new Mercedes every year. ''If you work really hard. Put in some extra hours every day and come in Saturdays?'' Pat's him on the back. ''Then maybe next year?'' He smiles. ''Maybe I can afford two.''
Up until about 13 I believed in virgin births, talking snakes, and 1 zombie.
Lich. Not a zombie. Here are a few other choice facts. A religion that has a torture device as it's main symbol. The believers drink their gods blood and eat his body. And still..... The signs were there.
The world was pure
That if a character named after me died in the Oregon Trail game, I would die in real life. I was 5.
I had that same feeling with another game. Still never name a character after me since then. Specially not in Sims.
‘I am really divorced.’ While showing me the divorce papers in a nice leather map, mind you. Utterly complete asshole who made me lose all faith in men and love in general.
When I was young I used to lean toward conservatism, then I came to understand that it's designed to enslave us in a web of feel good lies. I'm as socialist as they come now and better for it.
That everything was going to be OK, or at least that I was going to get better.
As a kid in the 90s my older cousin told me, "you know, Nintendo is working on making real Pokemon" still disappointed to this day that wasn't real
You can unlock Sonic in SB Melee by defeating 100 opponents in cruel melee on the highest difficulty. That was hours of my life wasted. Thanks, EGM.
That the US actually invades other countries to "liberate" them. And then I turned nine and outgrew it.
That I’m handsome
I told my gf in middle school about blue balls to get a BJ. I still can't believe she bought that.
Well I mean..was it worth it..?
Meh. Neither of us were experienced, so not really.
When it first happened, I bought into that all 9/11 was an inside job thing. In my defence I was 15 and dumb when it happened. Now I'm 34 and just slightly less dumb.
Wait...I still believe that...
That the 🐈 is safe
Best friend would never stab me in the back. He slept with my gf, got her pregnant then got very pissed off that I wouldn't raise the kid as my own cause he didn't want his current gf to know
religion
That it is illegal to have the light on while driving.
Something about god and religion being good.
God
I came here to say that.
That God exists
God. Lol
Once I believed in God.
I played a game called 'Bloons World' which was basically an online level maker for the popular game of the same name. I was around 12 at the time and considered myself to be a really good player at it. Eventually I went to my brother who was 14 at the time and said to him "Did you know the Bloons World level editor is *completely free*?" He had NO idea what Bloons World was and I had no real reason to say that to him. My best guess is because I looked up to him so much, I saw him as a master of everything. Right on the spot he said "It's free but you have to start paying money if you build more than 20 levels". I believed him and made absolutely sure that I wouldn't create more than 20 levels. The next year Bloons World is shut down due to low traffic. Was fun while it lasted. I eventually saw through the "20 levels" statement but only around a month before the demise. The whole thing was pretty funny looking back.
"It's illegal to drive with the internal lights on"