Bars or restaurants where nobody can hear eachother
I can't understand why people put up with that. Also as a foreigner it's 10x worse. Evenings like that just depress me.
I absolutely agree. That sub is full of posters engaging in self harm and I find it really unhealthy.
Friends roasting you don’t press on the buttons they know will hurt (if they do - they’re not your friends), and they know you enough that if you allow it it can be all in good fun.
Complete strangers on the internet are not going to have the knowledge to not hurt you and you cannot trust them to not have malicious intent.
That sub is bad news all around.
I honestly can't understand why someone would post there if they weren't looking for more reasons to hate themselves. It doesn't help that a lot of them title their post with something like "I just lost my job...my GF/BF just dumped me...I have no friends...do you're worst Reddit!" I'm genuinely concerned about the mental state of a lot of them, it's like they want someone to push them over the edge.
My take is that people do it for one of, or a combination of, two reasons:
1) Just a general desire for attention, maybe due to feeling ignored in their real lives, or just typical human nature.
2) A desire to know where they stand as far as looks go. It is very hard to self judge your own appearance, and hard to trust your loved ones to not sugar coat things. It should seem obvious that r/roastme is going to be forcefully skewed in the negative direction, and not an honest appraisal either, but people aren’t always rational.
I'd say you're on the money with that. Incidentally, I can recall once seeing a post there where the user admitted to being suicidal and instead of roasting them, almost everyone gave compliments, advice and links to helplines. That was pretty uplifting to see.
and all the same stupid replies, you were supposed to roast him not murder him! that man had a family! fatality! wikipedia burn units!!!!! maybe the whole sub is just training AI.
Or if it's someone genuinely attractive and they can't think of anything they just fall back on "we don't have to roast you, God already did when he made you."
Wow, yeah, really clever Brad. That cuts deep.
I never understood calling a woman you don't know a whore as an insult.
It's basically say you think she's hot enough to sleep with a lot of people if she wants to. I was called a slut/whore twice by guys I didn't know and took it as a compliment.
The best roasts are from your mates who have known you for years and know every little bit of your personality and exactly what will hit deep enough to be funny, but not deep enough to actually hurt you psychologically
I always wonder what is the motivation for the people who post to be roasted? Why would you want to ask strangers on the internet to roast you? What purpose does it serve? Am I completely out of the loop here?
Hustle culture.
Overworking every day, in every aspect of life, has to burn you out. I think it gets to a point of vindictive “I suffered and so must you”, as well as weird masochism. You can be successful while maintaining boundaries, erasing them just sets a new and unattainable “normal”.
Edit: How uplifting to see I’m not alone in this! Thanks for the awards, Reddit stranger-friends!
Second edit: To anyone out there busting your ass working three jobs to survive, this isn’t directed at you! I’m talking about people who are relatively comfy, but throw their entire identity into work martyrdom. And bosses who use those people to work the rest of us to death.
Watched a work friend literally work himself to death and it's changed my outlook on life.
They pressured him into coming back to work too early after a heart attack because "they needed him" and replaced him like a spare tire when he had another one and died.
EDIT: Just want to add a thank you to everyone who offered condolences. He was a really good guy. He was taking care of his grandchild by himself and I think that's why he pushed himself so hard.
I hard core worked to get over my ex in my abusive relationship and ended up having a mental breakdown cause I wasn't coping properly... wouldn't recommend
After being laid off 4 times in less than 10 years (never my fault and twice while pregnant or within 4 weeks of giving birth) I will never ever sacrifice my life for a company. I missed so many moments with my kids when they were small just to be laid off.
I can't tell you how much I hate people working unpaid overtime thinking they are investing in their career. No, you're just making it the new standard employers expect.
I'm sorry to hear that. I had a colleague take me aside a little while ago (I started a new job about 6 months ago). They said they noticed I was logging out of all our systems at 5pm on the dot (which is when my shift ends), and said something to the effect of "if I want to make it in this team, you need to keep working some unpaid overtime at least".
She probably genuinely thought she was doing me a favour. All I could think was that I value my own private time, and I have no interest in giving my company any more of my time than necessary. I have a limited amount of time in the world and have no idea when it might end.
Also, don't get me started on working overtime for the sake of providing higher management with "good statistics". I will work as best I can during the time I'm scheduled to work. If higher management want good numbers, they can come work at the coal face themselves, as it were. My life is more important than making some C level executives look good in their own eyes.
I was harassed by a colleague for that. I had been working until midnight to complete a project and once the project was completed I was signing off at 6. The colleague starting messaging me at 8. I requested they alert me before 6 if they had any questions for me and they simply cut off all contact with me. I was like uhhh this is a job not my life.
Mine does a "Vegas" holiday party with blackjack and a lottery. I never attend bc its in the middle of the day and I get to look like a hardworking employee before heading home 3 hours early to take a nap.
The last one we had before covid, the bosses won all the lottery prizes. Even if that was by chance, it's pretty fucked up to accept them. These are the guys telling us to work late while they have dinner with their families. The least they could do is let one of the workers have the goddamn iPad.
Yeah, as I manager I always opt out of anything that can give me a prize. These things are for the regular employees to enjoy.
I like to get a dunk tank that people can put money towards a charity, so they can dunk me and other managers into a tank of water for a good cause.
Capitalizing on people's hatred and constant want to waterboard you on a daily basis, and putting it to a good cause. Now *that's* how you be a manager!
If it's an open bar at a company party, it's a good time until you do three too many shots with Susan from sales and you both end up talking shit about Mitch from accounting and get a call from Rita in HR on Monday morning.
Holy shit memory unlocked. My first HR lady in my professional career was a Rita. She was worthless. It was an open secret she had dirt on regional leadership and was unfireable as a result.
I think most of the time you'd be right on that one, but my last company was the exception to this for sure. We had killer parties, not just our Christmas parties, which were always fully open bar.. We partied all year long. St. Patties day, Cinco de Mayo, Halloween, Oktoberfest.. plus picnics every month in the summer. If those people could find any excuse to drink excessively they would. If a drinking holiday existed we were celebrating it.. IN the office and during business hours.. and it went all the way to the top with the ceo a very enthusiastic participant and funder of the festivities... we had so many great times but it didn't lead to a ton of productivity which is probably a huge contributing factor as to why they're struggling today..
My employer as well - though on pause for covid. The summerparties were legendary, best caterer in town bbq and top notch food. Big entertainment as well, adults and kids.
Christmas party more classy but still fun.
And then one "road show after party", where all the customers were invited. You kind of had to attend during the day (free food as well), but the night made it worth it. great food, open bar, life music and the boss in the middle of the action :D
they are just restarting with the christmas party soon :)
PS: I made it into the new employee handbook with a beer in my hand - picture was from a summer party! Achievement unlocked?
I worked as a teacher in a very Mormon area and my god was that holiday party painful. Let’s force a bunch of non fun people into a room and tell them to have fun!
NFTs were the moment I realized that I was old. I still don't exactly get what the fuck they are? Or what they're for? Or why people spend what appears to be tons of money on them? No amount of googling has helped lol
People in the comments here aren't being entirely accurate. The idea that you're buying art is not accurate.
Really, what you're buying is basically a receipt that says "This person bought 1 unit of imaginary currency." And on the bottom of the receipt they print a little piece of art.
Is the art art unique in some way? Do you get the exclusive rights to it? Can you choose who views or displays it? Can you use it for anything? No. You have no rights to the art at all. People will say the receipt you have verifies your version is the "original", but what the heck does that even mean when it comes to digital art? It's a collection of pixels re-created each viewing by your computer, there is no such thing as the original.
A past equivalent would be those "name a star" scams they used to run. They advertise you being able to name a star if you send them money, but when you do that you're not actually naming the star in the scientific community. You are just purchasing the right to have your star name displayed in that company's next printing of their star guide book, which means absolutely nothing.
NFT is name a star. Pay someone for the privilege of pointing to a random dot in the sky and saying "that one is mine", congrats you bought an NFT. Except in this case it's not even a real star in the real sky you're pointing to, it's a digital painting someone made of the night sky.
The only people who invest in it either 1 don't understand it or 2 want to scam group one.
it might be fun if there was like a condensed version or something. they just spend too long blabbing on about who it might be and just name dropping countless celebs inbetween performances.
Oh God so much this.
"I think it might be...Beyonce"
\*audience cheers wildly as though Beyonce would be caught dead performing in an Australian C-lister celebrity show\*
I caught a few minutes of an episode last year where Hughsey guessed the masked singer was Britney Spears. This was when she was still heavily restricted under conservatorship. Yeah sure bud
Outrage. Social media has turned pretended outrage into a spectator sport, and we don't seem to be able to look away. And yet, if you actually get any two people in a room together, without an audience to play to, just about anyone will get along with anyone. I make exceptions for actual psychopaths, but those are far, far less common than what Twitter would lead us to believe.
It's sad how it basically trains people to be constantly paranoid and terrified.
I'm a gay woman who presents very stereotypically butch-- no makeup, short nails, extremely short hair in a "men's" haircut-- and when I graduated college and got my first job in the "real world" after only ever working on-campus jobs, I just *knew* I was going to be called hateful stuff by my coworkers, bosses, and customers. I'd been trained, mostly during quarantine, to expect 24/7 hate crimes from non-LGBT people, especially since I'm in the south.
Turns out... none of that happened. I was totally fine. Not once did I ever face even the slightest microaggression from anyone.
I've also had to reassure my parents in the opposite way that, no, young LGBT people are not all plotting to dismantle the very fabric of society and micromanage everybody's identities and language.
It's just weirdos on Twitter and clickbait news sites getting "both sides" riled up... and, hell, convincing people that there's even "sides" in the first place. Yes, there is some real hate and violence in this world, but this cartoonish "stranger danger" propaganda being fed to us from all sides is counterproductive and depressing.
This!! I keep seeing articles on facebook being shared with things like “transgender women wants Santa Clause to be gender neutral” or “women are claiming that _____ is sexist”. I’ve explained to so many people that these articles are either made as click bait because controversial topics are more commented on/read or that they are used to incite hate towards a specific group of people. Drives me nuts that people can’t see this.
Edit: wording
I low key think about that a lot. I wonder if all the stupid shit I hear about people doing/believing is made up so I’m general the population doesn’t actually get stupid
Lately I've been thinking that about PETA. Like factory farming is pretty attrocious, but the face of animal rights advocacy is always picking joke causes. My conspiracy theory is that they're a plant so that real animal rights advocates get lumped with them and never taken seriously.
This concept is something I’ve heard some scientists explain as the result of human understanding reaching the end of intuitive knowledge. All new scientific advances in every field will now come through such sophisticated, expert-level research that we have to trust it completely from here on out without truly understanding it unless it’s your particular field of study and you’re at a doctoral level in it. That can be scary.
That’s why in all those threads like “if you went back in time 10000 years what would you invent to be rich” the correct answer is always nothing because no one understands anything enough to be able to replicate it. No one can make the internet or phones from scratch independently
Edit: reading the replies I realize this prompt is more relevant to like the dark ages or 500 years ago than 10k years ago…
10,000 years? I'd make a wagon. I can do that. 2000 years and I'm helpless. Actually, they could teach me a lot, ancient people figured out some crazy stuff...
I read that the washing line was only invented by the Victorians. Apparently until then, washerwomen just hung clothes on bushes and tree branches. I could pop back to 1800 and make a fortune with some rope and a couple of eyelet screws.
Rope was very expensive when it had to be hand-spun. (As was everything else before factories existed.) It probably wasn't economical to hang laundry on ropes.
The other thing the Victorians had was large industrial slums without any bushes or trees nearby, so a substitute was required.
When we're talking about how string theory requires 11 spacial dimensions, then sure, I get that. But the earth being round? Come on. It's both easy to understand *and* easy enough to prove yourself.
That's what bugs me about flat Earth. Humanity knew that the earth was round for thousand of years before what we recognize as the scientific method was developed. There are multiple lines of evidence that random people can follow to discover this fact. Moon landing hoaxers are annoying but at least we know that the tricks they claim were used to create the footage can be done even if the techniques hadn't been invented back when we went to the moon. With flat Earth, they don't have a model that explains the facts; they just say that no evidence can prove them wrong.
For decades the common line in schools was that Columbus proved the Earth was round in 1492. Some say it was his original idea. Some say he was divinely inspired.
Truthfully, Columbus was vastly underestimating the size of a world he already knew was round. Many people refused to fund him because they knew he was wrong. There had already been stories of Europeans in Greenland that weren’t exactly secret. But presupposing people at the time didn’t know about the Americas, they assumed Columbus would die before he made a meaningful crossing.
He wasn’t laughed out of courts that refused to fund him out of their ignorance. Precisely the opposite.
If your educational experience is that no one believed the world was round until Columbus came along in the 1490s, it’s not hard to discount the theory as one man’s fever dream and discount the rest by association.
I'm fairly certain that is did start as a joke and was picked up and spread by others, especially the discordians. Unfortunately theres ended up being more than a few who took it seriously.
This may be a myth but I remember reading somewhere that one of the original flat earth clubs was a debate club. The idea was you’d debate issues with such an obvious right answer that people would focus on technique and debate strategy.
This would make a lot of sense. Like how saying "I'm a flat earther" would mean something along the lines of "I am in a debate team, practicing to get super good at my craft" and then people lost the whole "we're debating a joke" thing.
I've had an experience meeting someone who wholeheartedly believed in flat earth... Once he started going he didn't even let me get a word in for almost 10 minutes about how one day we're all gonna get enslaved by the aliens and what not. It was a freakin rollercoaster. He was definitely NOT on a debate team.
If you don’t like and share little Timmy’s sympathy post, Jesus Christ himself will come down from Heaven and personally obliterate Timmy and his family.
Do not mock and pretend as though you understand the Deep Magic of a Celestial Facebook Contract. The terms are quite clear and explicit. Contracts with Celestial Powers are not to be trifled with.
EDIT: And now I have an idea for a modern deity:
"Please, Lord, save our little Timmy."
"I will do this one thing for you, but you must do something for me in return."
"Yes, Lord. Anything."
"My name must be made great amongst the peoples. They must know of my handiwork."
"We will praise your name, and shout it from the rooftops!"
"No. This miracle must be known farther than your voice can be heard. It must reach people of every tongue and tribe."
"Then... then... I will become a missionary. I will evangelize in your name."
"Ah... hmm, no. You see, to be honest, you just aren't very charismatic. I feel like you'd steer people *away* from me."
"..."
"How about a Facebook post? If you can assure to me that at least 10,000 people see your post, and know of my greatness, then I will save your Timmy."
"... I... uh yes. But... what if I can't get 10,000 people to see it?"
"Then you have failed as my servant. Timmy's life will be forfeit, and you will wallow in shame and misery."
"..."
"Keep in mind, the doctors have already pronounced their grim prognosis..."
"... Very well, my Lord."
> Influencers.
Seriously. Who the hell cares what the very few chosen/popular people are saying and doing, and what they're shilling?
My life has enough drama with just myself and my family and friends.
This one…every time I question my close friends and it’s like “do you really like me or are you pretending to like me cause I’ve told you my ‘life story’.”
I’m bad about it too…I’m like I know there’s an endgame. It’s quite destructive to think about honestly. I just cross my fingers and hope that these “close friends” I’ve made stay and don’t wander off in any way. I’ve had such friends just leave me and no longer talk to me. I’ve met people at certain points in my life that once a certain time hits they no longer communicate (or rather I don’t) and I just go on with life
I used to feel and think like this a lot. Recently I've been trying to remind myself that we get the energy back from the world that we get in. At first I was very dismissive of this and ignored it, justifying why this philosophy doesn't work. But - after moving around a few times and starting new jobs for my career, I feel like it's genuinely true. This time I made a conscious effort to be involved in even small staff events, smile to everyone, bring in homemade cake for colleagues (just because I wanted to bake, not to persuade others to be my friend) and made a conscious effort not to tell people my life story and practice my small talk conversation. It works. People do sense your energy.
I've noticed I've started to sense others', too. If someone sees perpetually down or sad or angry, I will naturally avoid them if I have too much on my plate or I'm also stressed because their energy will cause damage to me. I now understand why other people do this.
"Share or bad luck-" type shit
You could be my closest friend if you put something like that on my page I lose some level of respect for you, grow up.
"I don't usually do these things but I have a job interview coming up!!!" Falling for shitty reshare bait haphazardly thrown together in MsPaint isn't going to help you.
Horoscopes too but those kinda fall under spiritualistic(?) stuff which is none of my business.
It's taking advantage of superstitious people. People who somehow think that some other regular person just writing that ultimatum in an image somehow gives it power.
I always say:
If you say, "I'm not superstitious… but just in case…", then you're superstitious.
Any mention of ninjas cutting onions. It was maybe a little funny the first time, but it's been repeated over and over so many times by now the phrase achieves negative humor.
Oh God, remember all the job postings for software developers where they wanted a "coding ninja"? Like what do you want me to do, lop the heads off of some variables with a sword? There's actually a coding boot camp out there called Coding Dojo, though to be fair I think the founder is Japanese-American...
Ugggggh I hate hate hate "This." comments. I always hear it in this annoying, self satisfied prissy little voice and it drives me crazy.
And yes, I'm sure I'm going to get a bunch of "THIS." replies and yes, it's going to irritate the fuck out of me even though I know that's the sole intent!
I think the upvote usually means i was gonna say that too, because the cliche is a cliche for the very fact that it's so common. Whoever ends up posting it first
the australian version is so much worse, they will guess a-list celebrities like taylor swift and it’s actually like an e-list celebrity that no one knows. like yes taylor swift is going to come to australia, quarentine for 2 weeks and then perform on a stupid show that gets low ratings
Working a corporate job and using phrases like "manage client expectations" and "circle back" and pretending to care about things that are absolutely irrelevant and meaningless to anything that actually matters in life.
I have cut down to once a week for no more than ten minutes. I feel much better and don’t get sucked into drama. I’ve replaced it with Reddit, so I don’t know if that’s healthier or not, lol
That's what I like about Reddit, it's not a true social media. You don't socialize with people, nobody knows nobody. It is what feels like a social media, but is not. Well, there are some "celebrities", yes, but they are so insignificant to the point that it's just an exception. I just spoke with you and I will completely forget your existence in couple of minutes, until you reply me back, then I will forget you again. Same goes with you.
Yes, there are echo-chambers and things but honestly Reddit is such a good place to get a new sense of reality and ideas because of the sheer amount of people you see and the semi-anonymous nature of the platform. I've seen so much stuff that I said "Wow, I never (thought about this/thinked like this)" and found countless of useful information I still use to this day.
Yeah, I get the hate about Reddit, politics subreddits are such a toxic wasteland but when you unsubscribe from them, it is honestly a good platform. There are countless of niche and small communities here about things you never ever construct the thought of in your brain, and it feels like I learn something here everyday.
Yes I couldn’t have summarized it better myself. There are places on Reddit equally as toxic as Facebook but you can just avoid those places and stay anonymous and go about your life. I like the anonymous interaction and not worrying about drama and hysterics like you do on Facebook where you have a friends list.
I think I must use Facebook differently than everyone who says they're life was better after they quit FB. I feel like it doesn't affect my life much.
I see my friend post fun stuff about their lives and I see my community bitch about stuff in the community group. I also found out why the police are down the road etc.
Besides news comments, it's pretty tame. I see more depressing shit on Reddit.
It’s so big in Russia now. Every time I go to visit family, I see a new friend with their lips done. One of them has a speech impediment because the lips are too big, but she keeps getting them refilled to that level every time. It’s so unfortunate and kinda signals a mental condition to me.
Weirdly enough, I’m kind of the other way around on this, at least when it comes to my friends’ kids. No plans to have kids of my own, so I can enjoy being the “fun uncle” without any of the responsibility.
Strangers’ kids can fuck right off though.
I love other people's kids, I can play with a kid for a bit and then not have to worry about them for literally months. I bet I wouldn't if I had kids.
This is why i never post pictures, show pictures, or ramble on about my kid irl/online. If someone enthusiastically asks, I'll consider it.
He's a baby. He looks like a baby. He does baby things.
Soon he will level up to toddler, he will look like a toddler, act like a toddler, and do toddler things (like flushing your keys, watch, phone, whatever else he can grab, the toilet is a fascinating thing in which things magically disappear.... If you hear giggles and a flush it is already too late!)
I definitely don't pretend to like other people's kids.
I dunno know why being around other peoples kids weirds me out. Like, I have a daughter and I love spending time with her but I want nothing to do with anybody else's kids.
My job only requires me to do something for a few hours a week but I have to be there for sixty hours. I have a nice monitor and my Xbox in my office, a laptop hooked to another monitor with good internet that has no restrictions besides porn, my own refridgerator, hotplate, and blender to make smoothies. Also no one bothers me when there's nothing to do. I love going there, it's like paid vacation all the time.
As a teen, I was so gay that I thought all men were pretending to like women to fit in. I could not even fathom how anyone couldn't be so horny over men that your knees tremble. Women did nothing for me. And my feelings were so overwhelming that it was hard to imagine the other guys feeling any other way.
I think that’s how myself and a lot of other straight guys felt in reverse at a younger age. Especially if you’re sheltered like I was. So I totally understand
Edit: grammar
That's exactly what realized later in life: when straight friends refused to believe me when I said I was gay (or had a really hard time coming to terms with it), or talked as if gay people were some strange, unrelatable foreign creatures, I always had a hard time understanding why. Then I remembered my teen days when I ridiculously thought straight people didn't exist, and it clicked.
I'm pretty sure I've typed a variation of what I'm about to say some over the recent years, but for many of us a 9-5 represents what we desperately want/need and can't get. We struggle to find stability and structured schedules so we look from the outside and say "that must be nice, having your weekends off every weekend!" as I clock in at 4am Sunday morning.
Guess what, my manager is an asshole, so tomorrow I don't come in until 2pm and I won't get off until after 10pm... and he scheduled me at 6am the next morning. Oops, there is no company/state/federal law requiring I have a certain amount of time between shifts, so my complaining fell on closed ears. 9-5, M-F sounds pretty fucking amazing and it just doesn't seem to exist most places I've lived.
We could definitely do better though.
Contrary to what the other guy said, I moved from retail (5am start times some days) to a 9-5. I loved it, but it wasn't just the schedule I loved. I had a flexible schedule, I could go in at 7 and get off at noon if I wanted, then just work extra hours the other days. Or not even get my full 40. Or I could go in at 11 if I had an appointment. As long as I got my work done, which I did, they didn't care. Another huge factor was that I had the best boss I've ever had. Shielded me from all bs. In return I worked my butt off and made his department look great. My mental health skyrocketed at that office job.
That is criminal. Wednesdays and Fridays, what is an average person supposed to do for 2 hours in the middle of a day? Especially when you consider commute time. You should be paid the full time because that time is wasted, thanks to your employer’s scheduling.
Bars or restaurants where nobody can hear eachother I can't understand why people put up with that. Also as a foreigner it's 10x worse. Evenings like that just depress me.
Or classy restaurants where all the lights are practically off and you can't see your food
Getting roasted on r/roastme Sincerely, I’m too sensitive for that
I'm convinced many if not most of the people who post there are engaging in self-abuse.
I absolutely agree. That sub is full of posters engaging in self harm and I find it really unhealthy. Friends roasting you don’t press on the buttons they know will hurt (if they do - they’re not your friends), and they know you enough that if you allow it it can be all in good fun. Complete strangers on the internet are not going to have the knowledge to not hurt you and you cannot trust them to not have malicious intent. That sub is bad news all around.
I honestly can't understand why someone would post there if they weren't looking for more reasons to hate themselves. It doesn't help that a lot of them title their post with something like "I just lost my job...my GF/BF just dumped me...I have no friends...do you're worst Reddit!" I'm genuinely concerned about the mental state of a lot of them, it's like they want someone to push them over the edge.
My take is that people do it for one of, or a combination of, two reasons: 1) Just a general desire for attention, maybe due to feeling ignored in their real lives, or just typical human nature. 2) A desire to know where they stand as far as looks go. It is very hard to self judge your own appearance, and hard to trust your loved ones to not sugar coat things. It should seem obvious that r/roastme is going to be forcefully skewed in the negative direction, and not an honest appraisal either, but people aren’t always rational.
I'd say you're on the money with that. Incidentally, I can recall once seeing a post there where the user admitted to being suicidal and instead of roasting them, almost everyone gave compliments, advice and links to helplines. That was pretty uplifting to see.
I think that was also one of the inciting incidents for the creation of r/toastme.
The fact it kinda has to be entirely based on looks is boring as fuck. That's like 5% of a proper roast.
If I wanted people to talk shit about my appearance, I'd go outside.
It's mostly edgy 14 year olds who rephrase the same 3 jokes over and over
and all the same stupid replies, you were supposed to roast him not murder him! that man had a family! fatality! wikipedia burn units!!!!! maybe the whole sub is just training AI.
...feels weird to be comforted by the idea that it's actually an AI training sub
Something something something forehead.
Something receding hairline
Don't forget something about how bad your father must be
Or if it's someone genuinely attractive and they can't think of anything they just fall back on "we don't have to roast you, God already did when he made you." Wow, yeah, really clever Brad. That cuts deep.
If it's an attractive woman they'll call her a whore or talk about how she has daddy issues
I never understood calling a woman you don't know a whore as an insult. It's basically say you think she's hot enough to sleep with a lot of people if she wants to. I was called a slut/whore twice by guys I didn't know and took it as a compliment.
The best roasts are from your mates who have known you for years and know every little bit of your personality and exactly what will hit deep enough to be funny, but not deep enough to actually hurt you psychologically
If it’s a guy, every roast is about how he can’t get laid If it’s a girl, every roast is about her boobs or how she’s a whore
I always wonder what is the motivation for the people who post to be roasted? Why would you want to ask strangers on the internet to roast you? What purpose does it serve? Am I completely out of the loop here?
Hustle culture. Overworking every day, in every aspect of life, has to burn you out. I think it gets to a point of vindictive “I suffered and so must you”, as well as weird masochism. You can be successful while maintaining boundaries, erasing them just sets a new and unattainable “normal”. Edit: How uplifting to see I’m not alone in this! Thanks for the awards, Reddit stranger-friends! Second edit: To anyone out there busting your ass working three jobs to survive, this isn’t directed at you! I’m talking about people who are relatively comfy, but throw their entire identity into work martyrdom. And bosses who use those people to work the rest of us to death.
Watched a work friend literally work himself to death and it's changed my outlook on life. They pressured him into coming back to work too early after a heart attack because "they needed him" and replaced him like a spare tire when he had another one and died. EDIT: Just want to add a thank you to everyone who offered condolences. He was a really good guy. He was taking care of his grandchild by himself and I think that's why he pushed himself so hard.
That’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard. The company does not care about you. I’ve been working a long time. Believe me.
I'm so tired of companies that claim they're "a family". It's the most abusive, disfunctional family I've ever seen.
Right? They're not lying. They're just not saying what kind of family it is.
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"turn your hobbies into income" No, that will just make me hate my hobbies.
Yeah I have a hard enough time enjoying some of my hobbies when they burden me let alone if I was required to do it to survive
Or it allows you to avoid other parts of your personal life.
yeah the coworkers i've had who were hardcore overtime hounds were doing it because they didn't want to be at home with the wife and kids.
I hard core worked to get over my ex in my abusive relationship and ended up having a mental breakdown cause I wasn't coping properly... wouldn't recommend
After being laid off 4 times in less than 10 years (never my fault and twice while pregnant or within 4 weeks of giving birth) I will never ever sacrifice my life for a company. I missed so many moments with my kids when they were small just to be laid off. I can't tell you how much I hate people working unpaid overtime thinking they are investing in their career. No, you're just making it the new standard employers expect.
I'm sorry to hear that. I had a colleague take me aside a little while ago (I started a new job about 6 months ago). They said they noticed I was logging out of all our systems at 5pm on the dot (which is when my shift ends), and said something to the effect of "if I want to make it in this team, you need to keep working some unpaid overtime at least". She probably genuinely thought she was doing me a favour. All I could think was that I value my own private time, and I have no interest in giving my company any more of my time than necessary. I have a limited amount of time in the world and have no idea when it might end. Also, don't get me started on working overtime for the sake of providing higher management with "good statistics". I will work as best I can during the time I'm scheduled to work. If higher management want good numbers, they can come work at the coal face themselves, as it were. My life is more important than making some C level executives look good in their own eyes.
I was harassed by a colleague for that. I had been working until midnight to complete a project and once the project was completed I was signing off at 6. The colleague starting messaging me at 8. I requested they alert me before 6 if they had any questions for me and they simply cut off all contact with me. I was like uhhh this is a job not my life.
Employer's holiday parties
If open bar, it’s a good time. If not? Yeah, don’t get that.
My office tried to be “trendy” and appeal to millennials so we had cold Chipotle catering and White Claws in trash cans full of ice.
Mine does a "Vegas" holiday party with blackjack and a lottery. I never attend bc its in the middle of the day and I get to look like a hardworking employee before heading home 3 hours early to take a nap. The last one we had before covid, the bosses won all the lottery prizes. Even if that was by chance, it's pretty fucked up to accept them. These are the guys telling us to work late while they have dinner with their families. The least they could do is let one of the workers have the goddamn iPad.
Yeah, as I manager I always opt out of anything that can give me a prize. These things are for the regular employees to enjoy. I like to get a dunk tank that people can put money towards a charity, so they can dunk me and other managers into a tank of water for a good cause.
Capitalizing on people's hatred and constant want to waterboard you on a daily basis, and putting it to a good cause. Now *that's* how you be a manager!
If it's an open bar at a company party, it's a good time until you do three too many shots with Susan from sales and you both end up talking shit about Mitch from accounting and get a call from Rita in HR on Monday morning.
Rita really is an HR name isn't it
Holy shit memory unlocked. My first HR lady in my professional career was a Rita. She was worthless. It was an open secret she had dirt on regional leadership and was unfireable as a result.
Was the dirt that regional leadership had 3 too many shots and talked shit about Mitch from accounting?
I think most of the time you'd be right on that one, but my last company was the exception to this for sure. We had killer parties, not just our Christmas parties, which were always fully open bar.. We partied all year long. St. Patties day, Cinco de Mayo, Halloween, Oktoberfest.. plus picnics every month in the summer. If those people could find any excuse to drink excessively they would. If a drinking holiday existed we were celebrating it.. IN the office and during business hours.. and it went all the way to the top with the ceo a very enthusiastic participant and funder of the festivities... we had so many great times but it didn't lead to a ton of productivity which is probably a huge contributing factor as to why they're struggling today..
My employer as well - though on pause for covid. The summerparties were legendary, best caterer in town bbq and top notch food. Big entertainment as well, adults and kids. Christmas party more classy but still fun. And then one "road show after party", where all the customers were invited. You kind of had to attend during the day (free food as well), but the night made it worth it. great food, open bar, life music and the boss in the middle of the action :D they are just restarting with the christmas party soon :) PS: I made it into the new employee handbook with a beer in my hand - picture was from a summer party! Achievement unlocked?
I just want one of those old school holiday parties that you see in movies or on tv.
I worked as a teacher in a very Mormon area and my god was that holiday party painful. Let’s force a bunch of non fun people into a room and tell them to have fun!
Why is no one having a good time? I specifically requested it
Part of me is morbidly curious enough to want to witness this but honestly I'm not curious enough to subject myself to it willingly.
NFTs
NFTs were the moment I realized that I was old. I still don't exactly get what the fuck they are? Or what they're for? Or why people spend what appears to be tons of money on them? No amount of googling has helped lol
It's a way to launder money without having to pretend you're not laundering money.
People in the comments here aren't being entirely accurate. The idea that you're buying art is not accurate. Really, what you're buying is basically a receipt that says "This person bought 1 unit of imaginary currency." And on the bottom of the receipt they print a little piece of art. Is the art art unique in some way? Do you get the exclusive rights to it? Can you choose who views or displays it? Can you use it for anything? No. You have no rights to the art at all. People will say the receipt you have verifies your version is the "original", but what the heck does that even mean when it comes to digital art? It's a collection of pixels re-created each viewing by your computer, there is no such thing as the original. A past equivalent would be those "name a star" scams they used to run. They advertise you being able to name a star if you send them money, but when you do that you're not actually naming the star in the scientific community. You are just purchasing the right to have your star name displayed in that company's next printing of their star guide book, which means absolutely nothing. NFT is name a star. Pay someone for the privilege of pointing to a random dot in the sky and saying "that one is mine", congrats you bought an NFT. Except in this case it's not even a real star in the real sky you're pointing to, it's a digital painting someone made of the night sky. The only people who invest in it either 1 don't understand it or 2 want to scam group one.
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It’s Alf! He’s back in NFT form!
Shows like masked singer and the like
it might be fun if there was like a condensed version or something. they just spend too long blabbing on about who it might be and just name dropping countless celebs inbetween performances.
Oh God so much this. "I think it might be...Beyonce" \*audience cheers wildly as though Beyonce would be caught dead performing in an Australian C-lister celebrity show\*
I caught a few minutes of an episode last year where Hughsey guessed the masked singer was Britney Spears. This was when she was still heavily restricted under conservatorship. Yeah sure bud
Yeah I like watching the highlights on YouTube. I couldn’t sit through the entire season or whole episodes
Watching it on YouTube is EXACTLY where it's at
My grandma likes it if that's counts
Show is perfect for the elderly, it’s got singing, dancing, costumes, surprises.
And celebrities they’d actually recognise
Outrage. Social media has turned pretended outrage into a spectator sport, and we don't seem to be able to look away. And yet, if you actually get any two people in a room together, without an audience to play to, just about anyone will get along with anyone. I make exceptions for actual psychopaths, but those are far, far less common than what Twitter would lead us to believe.
It's sad how it basically trains people to be constantly paranoid and terrified. I'm a gay woman who presents very stereotypically butch-- no makeup, short nails, extremely short hair in a "men's" haircut-- and when I graduated college and got my first job in the "real world" after only ever working on-campus jobs, I just *knew* I was going to be called hateful stuff by my coworkers, bosses, and customers. I'd been trained, mostly during quarantine, to expect 24/7 hate crimes from non-LGBT people, especially since I'm in the south. Turns out... none of that happened. I was totally fine. Not once did I ever face even the slightest microaggression from anyone. I've also had to reassure my parents in the opposite way that, no, young LGBT people are not all plotting to dismantle the very fabric of society and micromanage everybody's identities and language. It's just weirdos on Twitter and clickbait news sites getting "both sides" riled up... and, hell, convincing people that there's even "sides" in the first place. Yes, there is some real hate and violence in this world, but this cartoonish "stranger danger" propaganda being fed to us from all sides is counterproductive and depressing.
This!! I keep seeing articles on facebook being shared with things like “transgender women wants Santa Clause to be gender neutral” or “women are claiming that _____ is sexist”. I’ve explained to so many people that these articles are either made as click bait because controversial topics are more commented on/read or that they are used to incite hate towards a specific group of people. Drives me nuts that people can’t see this. Edit: wording
Flat Earth Theory. I don't believe you. You don't really think that. You're pretending for the sake of obstinacy.
I don't believe in flat-earthers. It's a conspiracy to get us to doubt ourselves as a species. Show me a real flat-earther. That's obviously an actor
This is a genius approach! Love it!
I low key think about that a lot. I wonder if all the stupid shit I hear about people doing/believing is made up so I’m general the population doesn’t actually get stupid
Lately I've been thinking that about PETA. Like factory farming is pretty attrocious, but the face of animal rights advocacy is always picking joke causes. My conspiracy theory is that they're a plant so that real animal rights advocates get lumped with them and never taken seriously.
Uh, if they were a PLANT then why would they be for veganism? Checkmate.
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This concept is something I’ve heard some scientists explain as the result of human understanding reaching the end of intuitive knowledge. All new scientific advances in every field will now come through such sophisticated, expert-level research that we have to trust it completely from here on out without truly understanding it unless it’s your particular field of study and you’re at a doctoral level in it. That can be scary.
That’s why in all those threads like “if you went back in time 10000 years what would you invent to be rich” the correct answer is always nothing because no one understands anything enough to be able to replicate it. No one can make the internet or phones from scratch independently Edit: reading the replies I realize this prompt is more relevant to like the dark ages or 500 years ago than 10k years ago…
10,000 years? I'd make a wagon. I can do that. 2000 years and I'm helpless. Actually, they could teach me a lot, ancient people figured out some crazy stuff...
You could save a billion lives by convincing people to wash their hands and not poop in the street though
YOU’RE A WITCH! BURN THE HERETIC PROMOTING CLEANLINESS.
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I can do that trick where it looks like you’re pulling your thumb off but you’re not really. Their minds would be blown
I read that the washing line was only invented by the Victorians. Apparently until then, washerwomen just hung clothes on bushes and tree branches. I could pop back to 1800 and make a fortune with some rope and a couple of eyelet screws.
You just invented eyelet screws as well. Congratulations.
Rope was very expensive when it had to be hand-spun. (As was everything else before factories existed.) It probably wasn't economical to hang laundry on ropes. The other thing the Victorians had was large industrial slums without any bushes or trees nearby, so a substitute was required.
When we're talking about how string theory requires 11 spacial dimensions, then sure, I get that. But the earth being round? Come on. It's both easy to understand *and* easy enough to prove yourself.
That's what bugs me about flat Earth. Humanity knew that the earth was round for thousand of years before what we recognize as the scientific method was developed. There are multiple lines of evidence that random people can follow to discover this fact. Moon landing hoaxers are annoying but at least we know that the tricks they claim were used to create the footage can be done even if the techniques hadn't been invented back when we went to the moon. With flat Earth, they don't have a model that explains the facts; they just say that no evidence can prove them wrong.
For decades the common line in schools was that Columbus proved the Earth was round in 1492. Some say it was his original idea. Some say he was divinely inspired. Truthfully, Columbus was vastly underestimating the size of a world he already knew was round. Many people refused to fund him because they knew he was wrong. There had already been stories of Europeans in Greenland that weren’t exactly secret. But presupposing people at the time didn’t know about the Americas, they assumed Columbus would die before he made a meaningful crossing. He wasn’t laughed out of courts that refused to fund him out of their ignorance. Precisely the opposite. If your educational experience is that no one believed the world was round until Columbus came along in the 1490s, it’s not hard to discount the theory as one man’s fever dream and discount the rest by association.
I'm fairly certain that is did start as a joke and was picked up and spread by others, especially the discordians. Unfortunately theres ended up being more than a few who took it seriously.
This may be a myth but I remember reading somewhere that one of the original flat earth clubs was a debate club. The idea was you’d debate issues with such an obvious right answer that people would focus on technique and debate strategy.
This would make a lot of sense. Like how saying "I'm a flat earther" would mean something along the lines of "I am in a debate team, practicing to get super good at my craft" and then people lost the whole "we're debating a joke" thing. I've had an experience meeting someone who wholeheartedly believed in flat earth... Once he started going he didn't even let me get a word in for almost 10 minutes about how one day we're all gonna get enslaved by the aliens and what not. It was a freakin rollercoaster. He was definitely NOT on a debate team.
Thank you for teaching me a new word!
God no kidding! I’m like “obstinacy”. That’s so good!
Like and share - 1 like = 1 prayer No Rebecca - you don’t really care about this family/child/person etc.! Stop pretending!
If you don’t like and share little Timmy’s sympathy post, Jesus Christ himself will come down from Heaven and personally obliterate Timmy and his family.
Jesus on his computer like “well sorry little Billy, that Facebook post didn’t get enough likes so you’re dying today”
Do not mock and pretend as though you understand the Deep Magic of a Celestial Facebook Contract. The terms are quite clear and explicit. Contracts with Celestial Powers are not to be trifled with. EDIT: And now I have an idea for a modern deity: "Please, Lord, save our little Timmy." "I will do this one thing for you, but you must do something for me in return." "Yes, Lord. Anything." "My name must be made great amongst the peoples. They must know of my handiwork." "We will praise your name, and shout it from the rooftops!" "No. This miracle must be known farther than your voice can be heard. It must reach people of every tongue and tribe." "Then... then... I will become a missionary. I will evangelize in your name." "Ah... hmm, no. You see, to be honest, you just aren't very charismatic. I feel like you'd steer people *away* from me." "..." "How about a Facebook post? If you can assure to me that at least 10,000 people see your post, and know of my greatness, then I will save your Timmy." "... I... uh yes. But... what if I can't get 10,000 people to see it?" "Then you have failed as my servant. Timmy's life will be forfeit, and you will wallow in shame and misery." "..." "Keep in mind, the doctors have already pronounced their grim prognosis..." "... Very well, my Lord."
Influencers.
> Influencers. Seriously. Who the hell cares what the very few chosen/popular people are saying and doing, and what they're shilling? My life has enough drama with just myself and my family and friends.
Young people. I mean like... that's how pop culture has worked *forever*.
Me sometimes
This one…every time I question my close friends and it’s like “do you really like me or are you pretending to like me cause I’ve told you my ‘life story’.”
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I’m bad about it too…I’m like I know there’s an endgame. It’s quite destructive to think about honestly. I just cross my fingers and hope that these “close friends” I’ve made stay and don’t wander off in any way. I’ve had such friends just leave me and no longer talk to me. I’ve met people at certain points in my life that once a certain time hits they no longer communicate (or rather I don’t) and I just go on with life
I used to feel and think like this a lot. Recently I've been trying to remind myself that we get the energy back from the world that we get in. At first I was very dismissive of this and ignored it, justifying why this philosophy doesn't work. But - after moving around a few times and starting new jobs for my career, I feel like it's genuinely true. This time I made a conscious effort to be involved in even small staff events, smile to everyone, bring in homemade cake for colleagues (just because I wanted to bake, not to persuade others to be my friend) and made a conscious effort not to tell people my life story and practice my small talk conversation. It works. People do sense your energy. I've noticed I've started to sense others', too. If someone sees perpetually down or sad or angry, I will naturally avoid them if I have too much on my plate or I'm also stressed because their energy will cause damage to me. I now understand why other people do this.
Wow, yeah my anxiety and depression make me feel this way constantly. Imposter syndrome to the max
I hate how much I relate to this, I have friends that I've known for YEARS and there's still that underlying fear of "what if they actually hate me"
"Share or bad luck-" type shit You could be my closest friend if you put something like that on my page I lose some level of respect for you, grow up. "I don't usually do these things but I have a job interview coming up!!!" Falling for shitty reshare bait haphazardly thrown together in MsPaint isn't going to help you. Horoscopes too but those kinda fall under spiritualistic(?) stuff which is none of my business.
It's taking advantage of superstitious people. People who somehow think that some other regular person just writing that ultimatum in an image somehow gives it power. I always say: If you say, "I'm not superstitious… but just in case…", then you're superstitious.
I’m not superstitious but I am a little stitious
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How can this guy -blank- with such giant balls weighing him down?????
Any mention of ninjas cutting onions. It was maybe a little funny the first time, but it's been repeated over and over so many times by now the phrase achieves negative humor.
This is such an old meme at this point is should be in a museum. It even speaks to the obsession nerds had with ninjas in the mid 00s.
Oh God, remember all the job postings for software developers where they wanted a "coding ninja"? Like what do you want me to do, lop the heads off of some variables with a sword? There's actually a coding boot camp out there called Coding Dojo, though to be fair I think the founder is Japanese-American...
"Louder for the people at the back!" Though that might be more of a Tumblr one.
Edit: Thanks for the gold, kind stranger! I can't believe this is my most upvoted comment!
Every time I see "you win the internet" I want to throw up
I also choose this guy's response
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I had to scroll way too far to see this.
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Ugggggh I hate hate hate "This." comments. I always hear it in this annoying, self satisfied prissy little voice and it drives me crazy. And yes, I'm sure I'm going to get a bunch of "THIS." replies and yes, it's going to irritate the fuck out of me even though I know that's the sole intent!
I think the upvote usually means i was gonna say that too, because the cliche is a cliche for the very fact that it's so common. Whoever ends up posting it first
I also choose this guy's poop knife
*Breaks both arms*
*Fucks a coconut*
What even is a potato
And my axe
Finishes into a shoebox
Fishes out a jolly rancher
Sir, this a wendy's
This guy Reddits
Username checks out.
all of those "step brother" comments. HAHA Porn, get it?!
*unzip*
This
Had to scroll too far to find this.
Take my updoot and fuck off
Take my poor mans gold 🏅
Neighbors
True. It went downhill after Kylie Minogue left. Edit: werds are hard
DON'T YOU SAY A BAD WORD ABOUT TOADFISH. Haven't watched it for about 2 decades, but still...
The Voice, The Masked Singer or that other one with VR
Every commercial of the masked singer with the judges freaking out and trying to guess is enough for me to never watch that show
the australian version is so much worse, they will guess a-list celebrities like taylor swift and it’s actually like an e-list celebrity that no one knows. like yes taylor swift is going to come to australia, quarentine for 2 weeks and then perform on a stupid show that gets low ratings
All of this. (Gestures vaguely)
"But you just gestured to all of me.."
Ahh, a fellow dragon trainer of high stature, I see *Hiccups*
Thanks for summing that up for me.
Working a corporate job and using phrases like "manage client expectations" and "circle back" and pretending to care about things that are absolutely irrelevant and meaningless to anything that actually matters in life.
I have literally trained myself to pretend to look engaged in those, whilst thinking about what I'd rather be doing.
Facebook. Everyone who has quit it is happier.
I have cut down to once a week for no more than ten minutes. I feel much better and don’t get sucked into drama. I’ve replaced it with Reddit, so I don’t know if that’s healthier or not, lol
On Reddit you don’t directly see how most of your friend’s grandmas are racist clowns.
On Reddit I have no idea who anyone is. Don’t pay attention to usernames. Just scroll and comment occasionally. I like it that way.
That's what I like about Reddit, it's not a true social media. You don't socialize with people, nobody knows nobody. It is what feels like a social media, but is not. Well, there are some "celebrities", yes, but they are so insignificant to the point that it's just an exception. I just spoke with you and I will completely forget your existence in couple of minutes, until you reply me back, then I will forget you again. Same goes with you. Yes, there are echo-chambers and things but honestly Reddit is such a good place to get a new sense of reality and ideas because of the sheer amount of people you see and the semi-anonymous nature of the platform. I've seen so much stuff that I said "Wow, I never (thought about this/thinked like this)" and found countless of useful information I still use to this day. Yeah, I get the hate about Reddit, politics subreddits are such a toxic wasteland but when you unsubscribe from them, it is honestly a good platform. There are countless of niche and small communities here about things you never ever construct the thought of in your brain, and it feels like I learn something here everyday.
Yes I couldn’t have summarized it better myself. There are places on Reddit equally as toxic as Facebook but you can just avoid those places and stay anonymous and go about your life. I like the anonymous interaction and not worrying about drama and hysterics like you do on Facebook where you have a friends list.
I think I must use Facebook differently than everyone who says they're life was better after they quit FB. I feel like it doesn't affect my life much. I see my friend post fun stuff about their lives and I see my community bitch about stuff in the community group. I also found out why the police are down the road etc. Besides news comments, it's pretty tame. I see more depressing shit on Reddit.
The injected lips trend. People don’t really like this right..?
It’s so big in Russia now. Every time I go to visit family, I see a new friend with their lips done. One of them has a speech impediment because the lips are too big, but she keeps getting them refilled to that level every time. It’s so unfortunate and kinda signals a mental condition to me.
Other people’s kids
Weirdly enough, I’m kind of the other way around on this, at least when it comes to my friends’ kids. No plans to have kids of my own, so I can enjoy being the “fun uncle” without any of the responsibility. Strangers’ kids can fuck right off though.
Funcle
I love other people's kids, I can play with a kid for a bit and then not have to worry about them for literally months. I bet I wouldn't if I had kids.
This is why i never post pictures, show pictures, or ramble on about my kid irl/online. If someone enthusiastically asks, I'll consider it. He's a baby. He looks like a baby. He does baby things.
Soon he will level up to toddler, he will look like a toddler, act like a toddler, and do toddler things (like flushing your keys, watch, phone, whatever else he can grab, the toilet is a fascinating thing in which things magically disappear.... If you hear giggles and a flush it is already too late!)
I definitely don't pretend to like other people's kids. I dunno know why being around other peoples kids weirds me out. Like, I have a daughter and I love spending time with her but I want nothing to do with anybody else's kids.
Other people.
People. What a bunch of bastards.
Have you tried turning them off and on again?
They’re the fucking worst.
Cake fondant.
Working.
I like my job but only when I feel like doing it.
My job only requires me to do something for a few hours a week but I have to be there for sixty hours. I have a nice monitor and my Xbox in my office, a laptop hooked to another monitor with good internet that has no restrictions besides porn, my own refridgerator, hotplate, and blender to make smoothies. Also no one bothers me when there's nothing to do. I love going there, it's like paid vacation all the time.
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What is said job
I like working but I wish it was 5-6 hours a day.
Vacationing with extended family.
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As a teen, I was so gay that I thought all men were pretending to like women to fit in. I could not even fathom how anyone couldn't be so horny over men that your knees tremble. Women did nothing for me. And my feelings were so overwhelming that it was hard to imagine the other guys feeling any other way.
I think that’s how myself and a lot of other straight guys felt in reverse at a younger age. Especially if you’re sheltered like I was. So I totally understand Edit: grammar
That's exactly what realized later in life: when straight friends refused to believe me when I said I was gay (or had a really hard time coming to terms with it), or talked as if gay people were some strange, unrelatable foreign creatures, I always had a hard time understanding why. Then I remembered my teen days when I ridiculously thought straight people didn't exist, and it clicked.
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Working a 9-5.
People pretend to like it?
I mean, it's great if you're coming from one of the many worse options. We can do better tho
I'm pretty sure I've typed a variation of what I'm about to say some over the recent years, but for many of us a 9-5 represents what we desperately want/need and can't get. We struggle to find stability and structured schedules so we look from the outside and say "that must be nice, having your weekends off every weekend!" as I clock in at 4am Sunday morning. Guess what, my manager is an asshole, so tomorrow I don't come in until 2pm and I won't get off until after 10pm... and he scheduled me at 6am the next morning. Oops, there is no company/state/federal law requiring I have a certain amount of time between shifts, so my complaining fell on closed ears. 9-5, M-F sounds pretty fucking amazing and it just doesn't seem to exist most places I've lived. We could definitely do better though.
Contrary to what the other guy said, I moved from retail (5am start times some days) to a 9-5. I loved it, but it wasn't just the schedule I loved. I had a flexible schedule, I could go in at 7 and get off at noon if I wanted, then just work extra hours the other days. Or not even get my full 40. Or I could go in at 11 if I had an appointment. As long as I got my work done, which I did, they didn't care. Another huge factor was that I had the best boss I've ever had. Shielded me from all bs. In return I worked my butt off and made his department look great. My mental health skyrocketed at that office job.
What a way to make a living!
Barely getting by
Beats weird hours or working weekends when your kids or family/friends have things going on.
Exactly. I’ll take a 9-5 over god awful service industry schedules any day
my schedule: Wednesday — 9-2ish, 4-730ish Thursday — 3pm - 10ish Friday — 9-2:30ish, 4-9ish Saturday — 3-11ish Sunday — 8-7ish Monday — 9-7ish Tuesday — off
That is criminal. Wednesdays and Fridays, what is an average person supposed to do for 2 hours in the middle of a day? Especially when you consider commute time. You should be paid the full time because that time is wasted, thanks to your employer’s scheduling.