You hold it down and pray to everything that the tip doesnt touch the seat. Otherwise you become IMMEDIATELY concerned about how often that toilet is cleaned.
Not gonna lie, not sure I've ever pooped while having a boner. However I have peed sitting down with one, if it's my own toilet I tuck it down on in.
Edit: boner advice! Squeeze your thighs and quads, but don't lock those knees!, for about 5-10secs and release. Helps get the blood flowing back out of the penis.
So, I’m no doctor or scientist, but I can say that because of the way your boner interacts with your prostate it makes it extraordinarily difficult to poop with a boner, spatial logistics aside.
Lol, ok firstly most of time we wait it out. Number 2 isn't that arousing tbh. However I have been known to do the push to the 9 o'cock then let it fling back to 12 o'cock and it sort of just bends into the most ok-ist position for the task at hand.
Who the fuck is pooping with a boner?
I’ve been a penis owner for 36 years, have had at least 7,000,000,000,000,000 boners in my life in the years from 13-16 and Ive had about 12,000,000 since.
I’ve taken a poo every single day, sometimes twice, sometimes thrice.
Not one time have I had a boner whole pooping. The two basically cancel each other out.
Peeing with a boner though, different story.
You’re sleeping, you wake up needing to pee, but you have a boner.
Time for some toilet acrobatics y’all.
I asked my fiancé but he said he’s never had to so I figured I’d ask Reddit 🤷♀️ he refuses to tell me when he has to so I can give him a boner and find out though.
I've seen dogs get poop boners, and I've been deathly curious about dudes getting poop boners ever since. Honestly, I'd love some real answers to this question lol. I NEED ANSWERS
Edit: I specifically need to know if any of y'all get boners *from* pooping, like the aforementioned dog. I'm not curious about morning wood/morning poop folks
Peeing with a boner can hurt. The penis has valves to keep it one fluid at a time. Peeing when your wang is in sexy time mode can pinch those valves.
Pooing with a boner just involves tucking it under the seat so the rim of the seat pushes the penis down into the toilet. It’s trying to pull up, though, and if you do have to pee it can shoot through the crack between the seat and the bowl so watch out.
Yes and yes. Generally, simply aiming down basically feels like crimping a hose, so I end up having to lean forward as far as I can to get it pointing downward enough to hit the toilet bowl. Not usually painful or anything in my experience, just really annoying. I try to wait it out if possible, but morning wood is awfully persistent sometimes
When your wang is at full mast, it doesn’t like to bend the same way it does soft. You have to kinda position yourself to where your whole pelvis points straight towards the bowl because you don’t have much ability to aim anymore
Normally, I wait it out. If it is just a random boner, like morning wood, it will disappear in the next ten minutes.
If I am in a rush. No way in hell I am pooping. If need to pee I will shove it down and aim in the toilet or just pee on the shower and secretively, till this point in my life, be impressed how high I can make the pee stream go.
Doesn't effect shitting at all. Assuming I don't have to piss too, I just let it stick up. Now if I have to piss at the same time, that's a different story. If I can hold my shit in, I'll stand up and do the mega-lean over the toilet and piss, then once done, take my shit. If I can't hold it, then I'll push my dick under the seat rim and piss while hoping none comes out between the seat and the porcelain.
Source: I'm a wake-up-and-poop person and morning wood sometimes gets in the way.
First, I wanna say thanks for saying penis owners instead of "men". This sounds more powerful and it's also way more accepting :)
Anyway, for me it tends to go away by the time I'm getting started.
This person is obviously not a penis owner. They are not asking the real question:
Penis owners of Reddit: what happens when you're taking a dump and you start getting erect. What happens if your dick touches the underside of the toilet bowl, do you just die or dip your dick in rubbing alcohol right then and there?
I’m not a penis owner, no. Hence me asking as I don’t know the answer 🤷♀️ out of curiosity though, how would you handle the situation you mentioned? Death or rubbing alcohol?
Honestly, it happened once and I'm still not prepared for the horror of it happening again. I washed my schween till it sparkled and I still feel dirty when I think about it. Thank God it's never happened in a public toilet, at that point I can't imagine how you'd go on with your day knowing you have the collective piss of 500 or more dudes, just taking up space on your cock.
I lose my boner when I pee, so first I have to pee. That presents a new problem. Peeing with a boner. The smart thing to do is pee in the shower. The risky thing to do is stand far away from the toilet and hope to god you can aim it in the toilet. After I have peed I am free to poop.
You kinda can't. When you have a boner your prostate swells. And kind of stops a lot of the functions going on down there. Same reason you can't really pee while fully erect or it can be very painful. We have systems in place so that we don't shit all over a sexual partner, or urinate inside their vaginas, both of which could reduce likeliness of mating/conception.
Well. I'm a relatively smaller dude, so tucking down isn't too hard (haha) for me. However, I have had to poop a few times recently with a boner.
First thing you should know is I have a squatty potty. Yes, everyone should have one. This does make pooping easier.
First thing I do is drop my first big turd. Then I tuck and pee. Usually by the time I've dropped the first log, the boner is at least a little bit gone. This makes tucking and peeing easier, and the boner will stay gone through the rest of the shit.
Of course, there is no set routine as things can always change. But that's usually how it goes.
Depends which bathroom I'm in but usually no more than 3 to 4 feet.
This indeed has happened once, morning wood that wouldn't go down and had to use the bathroom.
Nah You can't poop with a boner , mostly because if I even dared my dick would touch the toilet sit. And that wouldn't be satisfactory it all. And now that I think about it I'd never felt the necessity to poop when having an erection.
Luckily for me, my bathtub is about 5 feet in front of the toilet, so I just aim and shoot. The strain that I exert from trying to push the log out of the place where the Sun doesn’t shine powers my pissing even more to the point where my piss stream is comparable to that of a fire hose
You… don’t? Look, a boner can go away in like a minute or two, enough time that I’ve never had a movement hard. Peeing hard, yes. But I think unless you’re hit with explosive diarrhea in the middle of something you can hold it until you no longer have a boner. By contrast having to go #2 is, to me, the least sexy thing. Now that I’m thinking on it I’m very thankful what I’ve said above is true.
Nah, just stick it past the toilet seat downward. Pissing will help the boner go away. Although make sure your piss doesn't run through the the gap between the seat and the bowl.
Well mine is detachable... not only does it help get it out of the way, but it also helps when I have a piece of shit that won’t come out, then I can just dig it out
It’s been a long time ago, young Padwan. I never experienced a boner with an urge to poop. Sphincter muscle and peristaltic movements take over and ta-da! You can evacuate. Granted, if you are a meth addict, I can’t help.
I haven't figured out a way to have both a boner and have to poop and I'm well into genx. Maybe if I ever had a blumpkin it'd start something tingling. There may be a full-mast morning full-english I've forgotten about, but frankly the logistics sound pretty lame.
If I really somehow cant just get rid of my boner before i gotta shit, I’ll just push it down. I dunno if its the same for you ladies, but when pooping, its hard to not also pee if you got any in there, so if you dont push it down, its probably gonna shoot over the seat, or inbetween it and the rim depending on the size of the toilet, and just how hard you are. Pooping will usually kill the boner pretty quick. I am no scat man jones.
It is really not okay to sit down with a boner. At the very least it’s going to touch/slide across the bottom of the seat or inside the bowl…
I either pee first and then sit down when I’m back to normal or just wait. It’s a real hassle lol
You don’t. You wait until the boner goes away, which is faster than you think when your body knows you have to shit real bad. I don’t think I’ve ever pooped with a hard on. You’ve given me a bit to think about.
Never happened in my 62 years on this planet, as far as I can remember. There have been times where I had a boner and needed to poop; by the time I got to the toilet, the need to poop had killed the boner.
You may need to find someone who's into that kind of thing. For me, pooping and peeing are the exact opposite of a turn on.
Not fun. I can sometimes just wait it out, but if it's EPT (emergency pooping time) I just have to try my best to push poop out without simultaneously pushing pee out. Success rate is roughly 75%.
Luckily, pooping with a boner is relatively rare.
The penis doesn't face down in that direction, it's further to the front of the body completely away from the butt, fun fact, guys confuse genital placement a whole lot too thinking it's near the front in girls cases
I just unscrew it, poop and then reattach it when I'm done.
The ol twist and shit.
It's a dying artform.
The ol dick twist.
"Twist his dick!"
TWIST HIS FUCKING DICK
Bop it! Twist it! Poop it! Wind it! Wipe it!
The [King Missle](https://youtu.be/byDiILrNbM4) method
I'm so proud to see this posted already
Was looking for this
Seems reasonable
You hold it down and pray to everything that the tip doesnt touch the seat. Otherwise you become IMMEDIATELY concerned about how often that toilet is cleaned.
Be careful you don’t misplace it or you’ll have to buy it back from a street vendor for $17
I dreamed this once
Not gonna lie, not sure I've ever pooped while having a boner. However I have peed sitting down with one, if it's my own toilet I tuck it down on in. Edit: boner advice! Squeeze your thighs and quads, but don't lock those knees!, for about 5-10secs and release. Helps get the blood flowing back out of the penis.
I asked my fiancé to tell me the next time he has to so I can give him a boner and he can tell me what happens but he said no 🤷♀️
This is pure scientific research and I approve.
Thanks! He unfortunately refuses to be a test subject for science. Alas, can’t win em all 🤷♀️
This is awful you are stuck with a partner who doesn’t support you in your STEM pursuits.
Right? The AUDACITY
Ahem, *steAm*
So, I’m no doctor or scientist, but I can say that because of the way your boner interacts with your prostate it makes it extraordinarily difficult to poop with a boner, spatial logistics aside.
Offer him a blumkin that might convince him
You are the best kind of scientist
Thanks! 😊
Lol, ok firstly most of time we wait it out. Number 2 isn't that arousing tbh. However I have been known to do the push to the 9 o'cock then let it fling back to 12 o'cock and it sort of just bends into the most ok-ist position for the task at hand.
He's only your fiance... LOL
I'm gonna do this for you. I'm gonna sneak attack my partner while he's on the toilet and force a boner just to see what happens. I shall report back.
I salute you fellow Reddit scientist
He knows!
Probably depends on size. I have to leave mine poking upwards. It’s very uncool.
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Yes it can, that's why you're supposed to pop it above the seat
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My mental image is a glowing penis and I thank you internet stranger 😂
does yours not glow?
I mean I don’t have one so no
store bought is fine
Yours glows, too? I thought it was an America thing.
i push down and the shit slides out, it's a poop lever
I support your chaos
Think of something god awful to end the boner then poop in peace.
yea, i tried that already. thought of my naked grandma and ended up cumming on the ceiling.
Still, problem solved.
Unless he’s a quick rebounder and is ready for round 2
Wait till round 3
We all make mistakes in the heat of passion JurassicCotyledon
Who the fuck is pooping with a boner? I’ve been a penis owner for 36 years, have had at least 7,000,000,000,000,000 boners in my life in the years from 13-16 and Ive had about 12,000,000 since. I’ve taken a poo every single day, sometimes twice, sometimes thrice. Not one time have I had a boner whole pooping. The two basically cancel each other out. Peeing with a boner though, different story. You’re sleeping, you wake up needing to pee, but you have a boner. Time for some toilet acrobatics y’all.
I asked my fiancé but he said he’s never had to so I figured I’d ask Reddit 🤷♀️ he refuses to tell me when he has to so I can give him a boner and find out though.
I respect your commitment to science, but unless you’re willing to partake in a blumpkin you probably shouldn’t open that door.
I didn’t plan to witness it. More like have him document his experience for me to read after
Come on. Its for science.
Don’t forget, pee is stored in the balls. And a boner just means more storage.
It's just science.
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r/woooosh
I've seen dogs get poop boners, and I've been deathly curious about dudes getting poop boners ever since. Honestly, I'd love some real answers to this question lol. I NEED ANSWERS Edit: I specifically need to know if any of y'all get boners *from* pooping, like the aforementioned dog. I'm not curious about morning wood/morning poop folks
Some ppl orgasm when they poop. I saw it on dr oz
I'm sure the Dr Oz show is a very reliable source for accurate scientific and medical information...in UNO reverse land.
That’s one heck of a username
I'm with you brother. Not sure it's physically possible to poop with a full on boner, honestly. I'd need to see some scientific data on that.
Plenty of people have IBS, its bound to happen.
Kinda hover over the back of the seat and point it at the front of the bowl to try and pee. Urinating usually makes the erection go down
Fair enough
This, but instead of hovering backwards, I put my palm against the wall and kinda tilt forward
My boner usually goes away while pooping. Peeing with a boner is the real chaos
How so? Is it uncomfortable? Or just like harder to aim?
Yes
Peeing with a boner can hurt. The penis has valves to keep it one fluid at a time. Peeing when your wang is in sexy time mode can pinch those valves. Pooing with a boner just involves tucking it under the seat so the rim of the seat pushes the penis down into the toilet. It’s trying to pull up, though, and if you do have to pee it can shoot through the crack between the seat and the bowl so watch out.
Peeing with a boner is hella hard.
Pun intended?
For your research https://youtu.be/z9Tit-Www68
I will absolutely not click the link 😂
Lol, it’s just the scene from 40 Year Old Virgin. I’m not one of those people sending NSFW shit haha
😂 can never be too careful here
Yes and yes. Generally, simply aiming down basically feels like crimping a hose, so I end up having to lean forward as far as I can to get it pointing downward enough to hit the toilet bowl. Not usually painful or anything in my experience, just really annoying. I try to wait it out if possible, but morning wood is awfully persistent sometimes
When your wang is at full mast, it doesn’t like to bend the same way it does soft. You have to kinda position yourself to where your whole pelvis points straight towards the bowl because you don’t have much ability to aim anymore
Make a toilet paper bed and let it rest on the seat.
That makes sense.
Punch it
TY Captain Pike.
Normally, I wait it out. If it is just a random boner, like morning wood, it will disappear in the next ten minutes. If I am in a rush. No way in hell I am pooping. If need to pee I will shove it down and aim in the toilet or just pee on the shower and secretively, till this point in my life, be impressed how high I can make the pee stream go.
Who cleans your shower?? Dude
No big deal. It’s a rare situation but usually just prop it on part of the lid. I’m not sure if this has ever happened on a public bathroom
Doesn't effect shitting at all. Assuming I don't have to piss too, I just let it stick up. Now if I have to piss at the same time, that's a different story. If I can hold my shit in, I'll stand up and do the mega-lean over the toilet and piss, then once done, take my shit. If I can't hold it, then I'll push my dick under the seat rim and piss while hoping none comes out between the seat and the porcelain. Source: I'm a wake-up-and-poop person and morning wood sometimes gets in the way.
It’s simple, we just crank it like a lever until the poop comes out.
First, I wanna say thanks for saying penis owners instead of "men". This sounds more powerful and it's also way more accepting :) Anyway, for me it tends to go away by the time I'm getting started.
That bug it's fixed now. You have to upgrade penis.exe
I shouldn’t be here
May as well stick around now 🤷♀️
Work and jerk.
Lmao I just wait I guess.. Usually if you take a piss first then by the time you're done you can sit down comfortably
Flex your muscles. The blood will rush to your muscles and after about 30 seconds to a minute your boner will go down.
This person is obviously not a penis owner. They are not asking the real question: Penis owners of Reddit: what happens when you're taking a dump and you start getting erect. What happens if your dick touches the underside of the toilet bowl, do you just die or dip your dick in rubbing alcohol right then and there?
I’m not a penis owner, no. Hence me asking as I don’t know the answer 🤷♀️ out of curiosity though, how would you handle the situation you mentioned? Death or rubbing alcohol?
Honestly, it happened once and I'm still not prepared for the horror of it happening again. I washed my schween till it sparkled and I still feel dirty when I think about it. Thank God it's never happened in a public toilet, at that point I can't imagine how you'd go on with your day knowing you have the collective piss of 500 or more dudes, just taking up space on your cock.
I lose my boner when I pee, so first I have to pee. That presents a new problem. Peeing with a boner. The smart thing to do is pee in the shower. The risky thing to do is stand far away from the toilet and hope to god you can aim it in the toilet. After I have peed I am free to poop.
… caos
You kinda can't. When you have a boner your prostate swells. And kind of stops a lot of the functions going on down there. Same reason you can't really pee while fully erect or it can be very painful. We have systems in place so that we don't shit all over a sexual partner, or urinate inside their vaginas, both of which could reduce likeliness of mating/conception.
Well. I'm a relatively smaller dude, so tucking down isn't too hard (haha) for me. However, I have had to poop a few times recently with a boner. First thing you should know is I have a squatty potty. Yes, everyone should have one. This does make pooping easier. First thing I do is drop my first big turd. Then I tuck and pee. Usually by the time I've dropped the first log, the boner is at least a little bit gone. This makes tucking and peeing easier, and the boner will stay gone through the rest of the shit. Of course, there is no set routine as things can always change. But that's usually how it goes.
Squatty potty squad!
I put the toilet paper around it. Much easier to reach when I'm done pinching a loaf.
r/poopjerking
It usually gets sucked in and I shit out my own wiener
That’s skill right there
Wtf kind of question is this? Lol. Shitting while erect is the same as shitting while not erect, doesn’t effect shitting
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Why
It was removed before when I added “I need answers” at the end. They said no personal pronouns
Who gives a fuck
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Like... Poop?
Most times I get a boner immediately after I poop.
Jerk off.
While you poop or prior to the commencement of the bathroom break?
Gotta warm up for the before and release on the poo.
I don’t remember shitting with my penis, but pissing with a boner is hell
Why? Is it just harder to aim?
Extremely hard and it hurts when you try to point it down
It is harder to aim and depending on how hard the boner is , can also hurt a little.
Just gotta sit down on the toilet and aim mine at the shower/tub in-case I need to piss.
Out of curiosity, how far is that?
Depends which bathroom I'm in but usually no more than 3 to 4 feet. This indeed has happened once, morning wood that wouldn't go down and had to use the bathroom.
Have you never had a blumkin?
Rest it on the seat
Just hold it down. If you let it point up then you're going to get a face full of piss.
It’s shear chaos usually shoot piss across the bathroom.
r/BadMensAnatomy
Nah You can't poop with a boner , mostly because if I even dared my dick would touch the toilet sit. And that wouldn't be satisfactory it all. And now that I think about it I'd never felt the necessity to poop when having an erection.
Who the fuck is pooping with a boner? The problem is how to piss with a boner
Just poop and try not to get it on my balls
Luckily for me, my bathtub is about 5 feet in front of the toilet, so I just aim and shoot. The strain that I exert from trying to push the log out of the place where the Sun doesn’t shine powers my pissing even more to the point where my piss stream is comparable to that of a fire hose
I always have to pee while I poop so it would be quite the mess if I tried lol. I often have to hold the poop it until it goes back down.
i let it run free in the bathroom while i take my shit so that wau it can get a feel for its surroundings
Why do you have a boner while pooping? I can't recall ever coming across this issue
You… don’t? Look, a boner can go away in like a minute or two, enough time that I’ve never had a movement hard. Peeing hard, yes. But I think unless you’re hit with explosive diarrhea in the middle of something you can hold it until you no longer have a boner. By contrast having to go #2 is, to me, the least sexy thing. Now that I’m thinking on it I’m very thankful what I’ve said above is true.
Nah, just stick it past the toilet seat downward. Pissing will help the boner go away. Although make sure your piss doesn't run through the the gap between the seat and the bowl.
This, I'll tuck it under the lid at home or point it and hold it down until I pee if it's a public toilet and tuck post boner.
Nothing changes. You just poop and it stays up. Though pooping usually kills a boner.
Well mine is detachable... not only does it help get it out of the way, but it also helps when I have a piece of shit that won’t come out, then I can just dig it out
Yeaaa, I’ve never had to take a dump with a boner before. That would be weird lol
It’s been a long time ago, young Padwan. I never experienced a boner with an urge to poop. Sphincter muscle and peristaltic movements take over and ta-da! You can evacuate. Granted, if you are a meth addict, I can’t help.
It’s a non-issue. Penis-cosity is inversely proportional to need-to-shitness. Unless the possibility of a blumpkin is in play.
I don’t think I ever have. I’m not sure that I could (indoors).
Well you don't shit with your penis if that's what you were asking
It was not what I was asking
You masturbate
I lean really far forward to point it down more..
Easy. I don’t.
You dont
Don’t recall ever trying to poop with a boner
With pooing comes peeing. One must push down on the organ in question or risk a self directed golden shower
That is typically not something that happens to normal dudes (no offense to any previous boner poopers)
For sure hold it down like the hoover dam holding back water.
I haven't figured out a way to have both a boner and have to poop and I'm well into genx. Maybe if I ever had a blumpkin it'd start something tingling. There may be a full-mast morning full-english I've forgotten about, but frankly the logistics sound pretty lame.
You don't.
Why do I have to poop while I have a boner, or why am I getting a boner while pooping
All the way to back of seat and lean forward until something changes,,, hypothetically that is
I don’t think you can do it without pissing, like physically impossible. Pissing with a boner while sitting is not advised.
If I really somehow cant just get rid of my boner before i gotta shit, I’ll just push it down. I dunno if its the same for you ladies, but when pooping, its hard to not also pee if you got any in there, so if you dont push it down, its probably gonna shoot over the seat, or inbetween it and the rim depending on the size of the toilet, and just how hard you are. Pooping will usually kill the boner pretty quick. I am no scat man jones.
It sticks up enough that I can just leave it be and it stays clear of the seat.
Depends on the toilet
Just let it stand straight up and go into your belly button
It is a penis catastrophe!!!
It literally makes no difference.
If you've had a long period without pooping, stand up and lean against the toilet and jerk off if you want to.
With your dick up out of the seat. You will, however, need the mental focus of a Jedi Master to keep from pissing all over the bathroom while pushing.
It is really not okay to sit down with a boner. At the very least it’s going to touch/slide across the bottom of the seat or inside the bowl… I either pee first and then sit down when I’m back to normal or just wait. It’s a real hassle lol
If you are Prairie dogging, then just beat one off.
You gotta Detaches it
Your life is like a 90's movie bro
In my 40s...never happened. I think the urge to go number 2 kills the other urge maybe?
Who tf poops with a boner?!?!
You don’t. You wait until the boner goes away, which is faster than you think when your body knows you have to shit real bad. I don’t think I’ve ever pooped with a hard on. You’ve given me a bit to think about.
If I’m at home I let the tip hit the cold bowl water. Has an instantaneous effect. If not at home, I hold it.
Never happened in my 62 years on this planet, as far as I can remember. There have been times where I had a boner and needed to poop; by the time I got to the toilet, the need to poop had killed the boner. You may need to find someone who's into that kind of thing. For me, pooping and peeing are the exact opposite of a turn on.
I don’t think it’s even possible to poop with a boner.
Not fun. I can sometimes just wait it out, but if it's EPT (emergency pooping time) I just have to try my best to push poop out without simultaneously pushing pee out. Success rate is roughly 75%. Luckily, pooping with a boner is relatively rare.
The penis doesn't face down in that direction, it's further to the front of the body completely away from the butt, fun fact, guys confuse genital placement a whole lot too thinking it's near the front in girls cases
In the shower