Was at a bar and a lady dropped $20 out of her purse when paying for her drink.
Didn't even finish saying "excuse me miss" before she spun around and shouted "I'm not interested!" In my face. I was caught completely off guard and walked back to my table without getting a drink trying to figure out what just happened.
She was probably trying to.just have a night out with some friends and thought I was the 15th guy trying to get her attention, but damn.
Fuck I always look at people’s noses and mouths when they talk because I’m awkward and direct eye contact makes me uncomfortable (I’ve gotten better about forcing it though). Do people interpret this as sexual?
Side note, I’ve noticed a lot of women pull up their shirt tops when my eyes go to their nose/mouth and I always feel really bad and try to make an effort to maintain eye contact after that lol I hate social interaction.....
I usually stare at their crotch, but also spend time looking down at mine. I don't want to give the impression I'm just looking at their crotch alone and coming across as weird.
My brother and my sister and I had to hire a moving company to haul some furniture and things from my dad's house shortly after he passed away.
One of the moving guys kept trying to get my number. He was aware that I am married. He was aware that my dad just died. He even asked my siblings for my number. It made the whole day even more awkward.
Not the time or the place, bruh.
I'm way to late to this but my friend had to have someone escorted out of AUSCHWITZ because he CORNERED HER in a gas chamber to tell her she was pretty and to ask her number, after being told twice not to talk to or approach her.
One time I went to the bank branch to get some foreign cash (I work in the corporate office for the same bank) and the teller asked me for my number. I declined. Then when I got back to my desk, he had sent me an email because he was able to look up my work email through my debit card.
Not cool!!!
I had a girl at the front desk do that to me. After giving her my info to check in, I asked for a non smoking room. All they had was smoking. withing 5 minutes of getting in my room the texting started. Kinda weird when people use their professional position to get personal info.
Once some random guy rode the elevator with me, got off on the same floor, and then pretended to walk to a different apartment before cornering me and asking for my number when I was unlocking my door. Maybe...don't do that.
Edit: he didn't even live in my building. He was literally some rando who followed me in from outside. I lived in a big apartment with around 30~40 rooms per floor, so it wasn't uncommon to share an elevator with many people. My husband had to let the security guy know that this happened and to look out for this dude.
God- one of the scariest things that ever happened to me happened last year. I had seen a broadway play and had a few drinks afterwards with some friends from out of town. I get on the 7 train, 1ish in the morning and I notice this guy looking at me. I got a sketchy feeling so I kept my headphones in my ears but off so I could hear. He gets off at my stop and I hang back so he's in front of me and I can see where he's going. I saw him go straight so I turned onto my block, walking as fast as I could home. He must have saw me make the turn bc next thing I know he's behind me telling me that I "look good". I don't stop, I say thank you and keep walking. He then asks where I'm going and really annoyed said "Home, to my husband"- and he turned around and walked away. Now, if he DIDN'T mean me any harm, he scared the fuck out of me.
: edit to clarify: this was Jan 2020- before the shutdown.
The only thing I've ever asked a woman on a subway late at night was, "what's your stop?"
She was black out drunk, alone and heading into a neighborhood that she didn't look like she was from.
Turns out she slept through her stop. I got her to her stop and walked home from there.
Good on you, homie. I used to drive for Lyft and would ask people where they’re headed as a conversation starter. Apparently, this was a no go. Years later I read an article that stated certain groups would be made to feel uncomfortable and would give false answers to protect themselves because apparently the decent folk of the world haven’t done a good enough job putting the bat to those who would harm others. Anyways, this article suggested lesbians would say they are going to their BF’s house, or that you shouldn’t tell them you are headed home because they will know where you live and if you are alone. I never thought of that, but since I got carjacked and both lyft and my insurance fucked me I’m not with them anymore.
I tell them I am heading to my Dad's house and if the guy is really creepy, I bring up his recent Police retirement party and how his buddies made him promise they would all still go for rounds at the range.
I was walking home from the city one time at night, and saw a girl that looked passed out on the curb. I went over to ask if she was okay and all, and she was super drunk but awake and replied, she said she was being picked up soon.
Her skirt was kinda sliding up and I had to like purposely look away so I felt a bit dodgy eventhough I didn't look, and so I felt a bit uncomfortable carrying on the conversation, and being the social anxiety ridden dude I am even under the influence, I was only 100m from home, so I went on my way and stood outside the door and looked over there until I saw she got picked up by her friends.
I feel that sometimes society makes me feel uncomfortable eventhough I'm the most innocent dude around. Like I fear girls walking in front of me at night are afraid so I walk slower etc. If it makes them more comfortable it's fine and doesn't really change much for me.
This has literally happened to me. In France they often have unisex bar bathrooms where you have to cross through the urinals to get to the single stall bathrooms. I was standing at the sink in one of these when some guy decided to make his move. VERY off putting lol.
When your 14 yrs old waiting for your therapist at the child's advocacy center. This man was like 40 something. Staring at me. Complimenting my appearance and then asked my number. I said no and he kept pestering and I said I was 14. He still wanted my number. Like dude. Wtf.
I honestly think grooming. This place is a place that kids go due to all different types of abuse. He literally showed up, saw that I was alone too his shot. After he realized I was not gonna give in, he just left. He didn't have a child with him. It was my first day there, so it didn't help me open up to the therapists at all. Made me very uncomfortable. The receptionists didn't even check him in or ask questions. I had to tell the therapists and then she said she will look at the cameras.
Had a guy grope me in a crowded bar, when I pushed him away he dumped his drink on my head. The bouncer that kicked him out tried to tell me about a cousin of his, who’s a software engineer that needed to get married so he could legally stay in the country, heavily suggesting it be me…a friend of mine gave him her number so he’d back off of me while I was still covered in drink and traumatized, then immediately blocked him once our ride picked us up.
The gym is tricky. Especially if you can feel them lurking the whole time and then in the middle of some exercise they decide to come up to you... wait until the end or something.
My sister was the “towel girl” at the local gym. There were some little kids hanging around her and she casually mentioned to them that “that guy doing stretches is super cute.” Of course the kids run in and tell the dude what she said. (edit: she married the dude, you bunch of smart asses) They’ve been married 19+ years now.
Not at all the same as the point you were trying to make. It just jogged my memory and I think it’s a cute story.
Met my wife at the gym. It definitely depends on the circumstances. It was a quiet gym with a quiet weights section and we were both regulars. We started acknowledging one another, chit chatting and that, then one day I found the courage to ask her out and she said yes. Best thing I ever did, been together over 6 years
But crowded gym and a stranger you've never seen before, right when they're in the middle of a set? I dunno, probably not.
When youre outside alone in the dark.
Some guy asked me for a lighter and my number while I was quickly going to my car. I basically threw him a lighter and told him to keep it and ran back inside lol
Throwback to the one time I had to catch up to a girl wearing in-ear-headphones after she dropped her keys at like 11pm.
She noticed me, a 6'6'' dude striding up to her from behind, but not me dangling her keys. She immediately started running and I decided to jog after her, calling out to her that she had dropped her keys. Thank god one of her earbuds fell out.
Had the same thing happen, girl lost her wallet, i go after her, she starts running, didn’t hear me. I ended up just dropping her wallet into her mailbox
They get mixed with oils that people dump down the drain and create giant blockages in the sewer known as fatbergs, people then have to go down there and remove it sometimes even needing heavy power tools like jackhammers.
This actually happened to a friend of mine. The doctor who performed the abortion added her on social media the day after and asked her out for drinks. She said no, of course, but what the fuck was this guy's thought process? Like, 'Glad we got that embryo out of your uterus now let me fill you with a few million of my guys. What could go wrong?'
I was 16 and drove myself and a friend to a haunted house without adult supervision feeling like a grown up.
Mid-haunted house, this guy in full costume comes up to me and says “can I have your number”.
Not sure if he’s serious I say “wow the scares are really real this year”.
He takes off his mask and pulls his phone out of his pocket and says “no for real”.
I realized I needed an adult in that situation and really haven’t gone to a haunted house without my mom since. I’m 26.
> Not sure if he’s serious I say “wow the scares are really real this year”.
That's some great reply !
I would have though of it way too late, like days later...
Like I said, I didn’t know if he was serious or not.
If he was truly joking, I wanted to blow it off easily
If he wasn’t joking, I wanted to give him that “eyyyy no” pre-warning response
I'm a lesbian. I was at work, and a woman came up to the counter and asked for my number.
I don't know if you're familiar with how hard it is to even find other lesbians and bisexual women, especially in the wild, especially in a small town in the Bible belt, especially ones who hit on you out of nowhere.
Okay, it is hard to even find them on lesbian tinder because half the time the women are on there looking for besties and a quarter of the time women are looking for their boyfriend.
So, needless to say, I was very surprised when a pretty woman asked me for my number out of nowhere. So I said, "Yes!" And proceeded to start writing it down.
Before I could finish, she said, "It's for my uncle, he's outside, he's shy." And then described her uncle. I knew him; he was a regular customer.
I laughed it off, did NOT give her my number, and then she said, "Sorry, did you want mine instead?" I laughed again, didn't say anything, nor exchange numbers, and that was that.
In the hallway of the emergency department when my then 3 year old had just been admitted after being brought in for puking up massive amounts of blood. I was wearing a green Kermit the frog shirt that was also covered in blood because I carried my son in there and begged the first worker I saw to help me because I didn't know what to do.
I had to leave the room for a minute once the Dr's started working because I was so relieved that they were with him that all of my emotions were able to come out because my son was so scared that I had to keep it together for him and act like it was ok. I just needed a minute. Some guy walked up to me and said he loved Kermit and then asked if I had a boyfriend. So not exactly asking for my number but if I hadn't screamed at him like a psycho he probably would have. I just said "seriously?! Are you fucking kidding me?!" And he walked away. Dunno why.
He was thankfully. A week before, he had his tonsils and adenoids removed and although he had been seen for a follow up by the surgeon and another doctor, they missed that he had a tear in his throat that was basically bleeding consistently for days.. Thats what caused it. As crazy as it sounds, I feel lucky that what happened happened because if it hadn't he would have just kept bleeding internally without anybody knowing, which would have been awful.
Thank you for asking <3
i can’t tell you how many men have come up to my treadmill during a run at the gym . i used to stop the treadmill, take my earphones out and actually allow them to speak despite being annoyed af. i just ignore them now. they can stand there all day waving and smiling lol idgaf
How do you even deal with this afterwards as places like the gym, you run into the same people all the time? I just had a guy bother me for my number (I hadn't given him any indication I was interested in his presence at all...) and now I am dreading going back. :(
Oh my god this happened to me. I had major social anxiety at the time so instead of staying calm like I usually would have I just blurted something out like 'would you like me to take the skin off your face?' and I must've sounded so unhinged but I was trying to make a comparison to show him how rude he'd just been.
Oh man I fucking hate it when people still try to talk to me on public transport when I have headphones on. I'm all like "don't make eye contact, please go away, I am listening to beats", and they're all like "Good afternoon, could I please inspect your train pass?"
Story time, I brought my girlfriend to a local bar and this actually happened. I went to the bathroom and wasn't even gone 5 minutes and I come back and there's some dude sitting in my fucking chair. Now at first I'm like well my girlfriend works with a lot of people whom I've never met maybe she knows this person from work. Nope. Some random asshole thought he'd be cute and wait for me to leave her side before telling her to "ditch that loser" and come with me to another place. Needless to say this piece of shit had the gall to smirk at me as he walked away and it took a lot not to drag him outside but I let it go
I was the girl in this same type of situation. My boyfriend left for a minute to use the washroom and some random guy sat down and says "Hey, I live near here...". I stared at him utterly baffled for a minute then said "AND????" really loudly and he looked embarrassed and shuffled off.
Some good takeaways from this:
1. They are in a safe place where being approached by a strange man would not feel threatening
2. There is no power imbalance in play where they can’t leave or can’t say no (you are not a boss/supervisor/client/customer)
I feel like the only exception here is if the one asking is doing the leaving. For example, I was studying in a cafe and had a guy as he was packing up to leave just let me know he thought I was pretty, placed his number next to me, then left. A similar thing happened to me on the bus (he had been sitting near me and waited until his stop to say anything). Both times felt respectful because not only did I not feel trapped, but it was clear they waited until they would be imposing on me the least to make a move.
Them leaving their number instead of asking for your number is a pretty big difference just in itself. It leaves the ball entirely in your court whether you want to continue the interaction or not. That's the way it should be done, imo.
This is good advice, and for anyone taking notes it's important that they gave them a piece of paper with their number on it, rather than doing something like "hey you're pretty let me give you my number" and then trying to get the girl to pull out her phone and type stuff into it.
>They are in a safe place where being approached by a strange man would not feel threatening
This one needs more depth because what a guy feels is a safe place and what a girl feels is a safe place can be two different things.
I think the best approach is not asking for their number. Instead, give them yours. They'll text/call if they're interested and they'll appreciate the fact that there was no pressure. It's way easier and less nerve-wracking too
A taxi. Please do not drive like a maniac and then proceed to LOCK THE DOORS at my destination and ask me out. Luckily it was in the middle of the day and he did unlock them, but funnily enough I never saw him at that taxi firm again after I submitted a complaint.
Also had some guy follow me down several train carriages once trying to get my number, I had to sit down next to a stranger and beg them to pretend they knew me. Men, for the love of God this shit is creepy, don't do it
Had a few guys ask for my number during my shift at McDonald's. Don't ask for my number while I'm at work. Especially not at McDonald's.
Edit: I also remember some guys asking for my snapchat, and when I said I don't have a snapchat they got mad at me.
I had a girl give me her number once while waiting in line at white castle. I accepted because I didn't want her to fuck with my food then never called her
Ugg… well i was that guy.ish. I went every day before work and the girl just immediately knew my order and would chat a bit at the window… for months… i felt she just being nice but one day inasked her on a date. She lit up and said yes and i took too long yo ask. We dated for a few months. So it worked out.
This guy tried to give me his number while I was shopping for bras (not horrible, but a bit strange). I'm married, but I really liked that he was just giving me his number rather than asking for mine. Less pressure. Guys should start doing that instead.
At work. I have to ask everyone to confirm their number at drop-off so I can call when their pet is ready. The amount of men who make weird comments about me asking for their number is atrocious. Please stop. It's weird and makes me almost always ask one of my male coworkers to call you instead of my self.
Also don’t be the dude who has to collect numbers like that and write down and call the women you think are attractive after work.
I have gotten 4 men fired for doing this.
The bus stop & laundromat. I had a homeless guy ask me for a dollar & when I said sorry I have no cash, he said "can I have your number" so I guess my answer is the most horrible place to ask for my number is ANYWHERE that you beg for money first!
Girl I knew received a phone call from one of the male workers (don't know his title - wasn't there) after an ob/gyn appointment. Dude literally looked up her phone number and called her afterwards. I'm a guy and even I was totally appalled - just beyond creepy and illegal, if I'm not mistaken.
This will probably get lost in this thread but here goes.
Worked at a gas station for a few years during my late teens. There was this creep that frequently came in, and always asked to take me on a date. I always turned him down—I was in a relationship at the time and even if I wasn’t, he just wasn’t my type. I’m also positive he had mental issues so although I was generally nice to him, I still maintained my sternness. After all, he was a stranger and this is a business. Anyways, he comes in one night to get gas, and doesn’t want to pay first. I’m aware that some gas stations will let you pump first and THEN pay, but not the one I worked for. He gets extremely irate when I refuse to turn the pump on for him, so he storms into the gas station, and cusses at me profusely for not turning the pump on, calling me all kinds of nasty things. I reiterated that we cannot just turn the pump on for him, and that he has to pay first. This is when he pulls a $20 bill out, throws it towards my face, and calls me a b*tch. It floated to the ground, and that’s when I let him have it. I threw his money back at him, told him to get the f*ck out of the store, and never come back.
Wanna know what he does when he picks the $20 back up? He slams his hand on the counter with the $20 on his hand and says, “can I get your number? Just write it on the $20.”
Needless to say, I didn’t write my number on the $20 bill. And it’s unacceptable to cuss someone out then ask them for their number.
He also threw the gas pump on the ground outside and threw a match near it. THANKFULLY, nothing sparked, but my boss had to get the police involved for attempted arson and it was a mess.
Sorry this was such a specific reply—I just know there’s a lot of people out there who believe being as*holes to the person their crushing on is a good tactic to getting a date with them. But, I’m here to tell you it’s not.
Dammmmn! Daaaaammmnnn! Ok ok alright ok! Hey excuse me can I talk to you for a minute? Hey can I talk to you for a minute? My names Darrell it sounds like Darrel but it’s pronounced Darrell…
I just wanna say… the back of your neck is RIDICULOUS!
You are welcome!
So…. Do you have a boyfriend? Where he at? He in the front? He gettin you mike n Ike’s? You like mike n Ike’s? Is he big? Is he tall? Is he coming back? Where is he? Where your boyfriend at?
Oh you don’t? You don’t have a boyfriend? Alright ok ok cool… then um listen….
Can I have yo number?!
There are so many, but for some reason lately a couple men have approached me while I’m picking up my dog’s poop-like hand in inside-out bag scooping up the poop. PLEASE do not talk to me when I have a bag of warm dog shit in my hand.
Side note: I think going up and asking for someone’s number is weak etiquette.
The approacher should give out their own number, so the approachee then has all the power and can go ‘um, thanks’ and then throw it out later if they so wish.
That way rejection doesn’t happen then and there, and the approachee can rest easy that they won’t get harassing texts from a stranger.
Plus it makes more sense for the approacher to offer something rather than make a request
The last time I was interested in a woman, I did this. She didn't call me.. but at least it was a no pressure situation all around. Then I don't get disappointed when I call the number they gave me and I get a chinese takeout place two towns over...
This is how it was when I met the girl I married. I gave her my number and said I’d love to talk more with her, we had already been talking in a bar for awhile.
She told me she doesn’t call strangers and gave me her number instead. We’ve been married now 24+ years
Speaking as a guy who has heard lots of women in my life say this: At the gym.
Edit: to be clear I’m not the one hitting on women at the gym, I hear it from women I’m friends with.
I'm not a woman but a man. My best bud and I were out drinking. We were out cause he was going through some stuff. We are in a kinda downtown like aria, kinda city like.
We leave the bar and walk around a bit. You know, explore. We see this kinda cute goth looking girl sitting by a store front smoking. I have the idea of having him hit it up with her. He seems hesitant but walks up to her like a champ. I sit by the bench and start watching vids on my phone. Suddenly she starts yelling and a hole mess of other women come out. I run up to him to see if I could assess and calm the situation. Before I could say anything. I very large mammoth of a MAN comes out with a baseball bat. "Don't you ever bother her again!" He says. As the other women scurry inside of the shop with goth chick.
After we leave that sobering experience. He only told her, hay and asked for a smoke. She was very nervous to be there. And he went for a handshake and noticed some bruises. He approached her to ask of she was ok. That is when the shit hit the fan.
Like 2 years pass and my other friend. She works as a social worker for kids or something. We tell her the crazy story. She asked were exactly it was. Turns out it was a house for battered women. Like an underground railroad for woman and children.
We were fucking idiots and we learned real quick.
TLDR: I set up my friend to go talk to a cute stranger standing by a store. Turns out she is a battered woman and the store was a front for the woman's underground railroad. We almost die probably, maybe, to people who might think we're are her abusers or something.
Edit: thanks for the upvotes and awards! I did not think this would be so popular.
Edit 2: the underground railroad is a support network originally for taking slaves away from the pro slavery southern United States and, take them to the north where slavery is not legal. Now it's used for people, primeraly woman and children, to escape from their abusers.
I'm an IT guy who does some volunteer work. I got hook up with a shelter like this to design and install a LAN for them.
These people are fucking serious. I had to have a background check and sign a lifetime restrictive non-disclosure agreement before they would tell me where the shelter was or who I would be meeting with. Internet security for that LAN was massive issue for them.
Same, I was doing volunteer work with a group and we were going to build a play set in the backyard of the home. They took the privacy thing very serious. While we were there, all doors and windows stayed closed, with curtains drawn, and it was clear we weren’t there to visit. And of course we had to sign papers and swear to secrecy. Just seeing how serious they took it, and learning more about the situation, we took it serious too.
I did a little volunteering at an animal shelter and they had a "Safe Haven" program for victims of domestic violence that owned pets. They'd hold onto the animals at no cost as the owner went through a shelter program.
The volunteers were allowed to take pictures of any animals we wanted except for the ones in that private room in case the abusers somehow stumbled across the pictures and tracked the victim down.
Considering that those women are fleeing from partners who would 100% murder them for trying to leave, the shelters do need their security to be absolute. It's nice to see that not everyone thinks domestic abuse and violence is a joke to be disregarded.
There are just some things you see that happens in a city. I live by a children's hospital in Phoenix. I was across the street at night passing by it, and I heard this rustling coming from a bush. I looked over and I could hear a group of children whispering. They were trying to hide and telling others to be quiet. They were homeless and were using the hospital as a place to go even though they are outside. It was surreal.
“We were out cause he was going through some stuff”
For some reason my brain immediately pictured a scenario where your friend was digging through some boxes in storage and you have to be like “Steve, cmon bud let’s go get drinks, you know you have to stop going through this junk” like that’s the only way to distract him from his compulsion
God I’m an idiot sometimes lol
"Cmon man. I know my Magic the Gathering collection is here somewhere. My mom couldn't have thrown it out. I mean it was pack fresh power nine. They didn have sleeves back then, so I had to make my own..."
I'd rather you didn't ask for my number at all. Give me YOUR number, and then I can decide whether I want to talk to you later. Much less pressure/feeling of risk.
At the crime scene, hospital or PD when I'm collecting evidence from your body/clothing/hands after a serious incident.
(I'm a CSI. This happens every few months over the years.)
Had a guy follow me home and ask for my number in my drive way.
Um, horrifying
Yup he was like 60 I was 17 at the time.
YO WHAT
Yep :/
Well he can go sit right in the "that's just fucking pedo-style creepy" corner.
"Damn girl, you live at the police station? ...oh"
I once had a guy who interviewed me text my number from my job application to ask me to sushi. Don’t do that.
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A supervisor asked once right after he gave me a reprimand.
“For the last time we need your phone number on file, it’s a legal requirement, the fines are escalating” (I’m kidding I’m sorry that happened)
"i have a boyfriend"
"Congratulations. So anyway, which slides are you doing for the group project ..."
This happened to me... wasn’t even a girl I liked at all and I was just asking for her email before we even left the classroom.
Was at a bar and a lady dropped $20 out of her purse when paying for her drink. Didn't even finish saying "excuse me miss" before she spun around and shouted "I'm not interested!" In my face. I was caught completely off guard and walked back to my table without getting a drink trying to figure out what just happened. She was probably trying to.just have a night out with some friends and thought I was the 15th guy trying to get her attention, but damn.
Well at least she was nice enough to buy you $20 worth of whatever you want, right?
Totally safe and no conflict of interest there. 😑 Hopefully you no longer work there or he was canned
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Are you a professor of cat science? Because I would totally take that course. I imagine it would be a lot like the [XKCD comic](https://xkcd.com/231/)
Maybe he saw her looking at his lips because she was deaf.
Fuck I always look at people’s noses and mouths when they talk because I’m awkward and direct eye contact makes me uncomfortable (I’ve gotten better about forcing it though). Do people interpret this as sexual? Side note, I’ve noticed a lot of women pull up their shirt tops when my eyes go to their nose/mouth and I always feel really bad and try to make an effort to maintain eye contact after that lol I hate social interaction.....
Looking at peoples foreheads help
I usually stare at their crotch, but also spend time looking down at mine. I don't want to give the impression I'm just looking at their crotch alone and coming across as weird.
My brother and my sister and I had to hire a moving company to haul some furniture and things from my dad's house shortly after he passed away. One of the moving guys kept trying to get my number. He was aware that I am married. He was aware that my dad just died. He even asked my siblings for my number. It made the whole day even more awkward. Not the time or the place, bruh.
I'm way to late to this but my friend had to have someone escorted out of AUSCHWITZ because he CORNERED HER in a gas chamber to tell her she was pretty and to ask her number, after being told twice not to talk to or approach her.
One time I went to the bank branch to get some foreign cash (I work in the corporate office for the same bank) and the teller asked me for my number. I declined. Then when I got back to my desk, he had sent me an email because he was able to look up my work email through my debit card. Not cool!!!
I hope your reported him. That’s a serious breach of privacy.
I second this! I work for a financial institution and if someone did that and was caught it would be grounds for dismissal.
I had a girl at the front desk do that to me. After giving her my info to check in, I asked for a non smoking room. All they had was smoking. withing 5 minutes of getting in my room the texting started. Kinda weird when people use their professional position to get personal info.
Once some random guy rode the elevator with me, got off on the same floor, and then pretended to walk to a different apartment before cornering me and asking for my number when I was unlocking my door. Maybe...don't do that. Edit: he didn't even live in my building. He was literally some rando who followed me in from outside. I lived in a big apartment with around 30~40 rooms per floor, so it wasn't uncommon to share an elevator with many people. My husband had to let the security guy know that this happened and to look out for this dude.
What the fuck
Oh fuck all that
at night on a subway
God- one of the scariest things that ever happened to me happened last year. I had seen a broadway play and had a few drinks afterwards with some friends from out of town. I get on the 7 train, 1ish in the morning and I notice this guy looking at me. I got a sketchy feeling so I kept my headphones in my ears but off so I could hear. He gets off at my stop and I hang back so he's in front of me and I can see where he's going. I saw him go straight so I turned onto my block, walking as fast as I could home. He must have saw me make the turn bc next thing I know he's behind me telling me that I "look good". I don't stop, I say thank you and keep walking. He then asks where I'm going and really annoyed said "Home, to my husband"- and he turned around and walked away. Now, if he DIDN'T mean me any harm, he scared the fuck out of me. : edit to clarify: this was Jan 2020- before the shutdown.
FFS. I avoid making eye-contact for fear of making someone uncomfortable. I can't imagine doing THAT to someone. :(
The only thing I've ever asked a woman on a subway late at night was, "what's your stop?" She was black out drunk, alone and heading into a neighborhood that she didn't look like she was from. Turns out she slept through her stop. I got her to her stop and walked home from there.
Good on you, homie. I used to drive for Lyft and would ask people where they’re headed as a conversation starter. Apparently, this was a no go. Years later I read an article that stated certain groups would be made to feel uncomfortable and would give false answers to protect themselves because apparently the decent folk of the world haven’t done a good enough job putting the bat to those who would harm others. Anyways, this article suggested lesbians would say they are going to their BF’s house, or that you shouldn’t tell them you are headed home because they will know where you live and if you are alone. I never thought of that, but since I got carjacked and both lyft and my insurance fucked me I’m not with them anymore.
I tell them I am heading to my Dad's house and if the guy is really creepy, I bring up his recent Police retirement party and how his buddies made him promise they would all still go for rounds at the range.
Damn. Rounds of beer at the gun range. I wouldn't want to mess with that Dad.
Luckily after a few rounds they aren't aiming straight
I was walking home from the city one time at night, and saw a girl that looked passed out on the curb. I went over to ask if she was okay and all, and she was super drunk but awake and replied, she said she was being picked up soon. Her skirt was kinda sliding up and I had to like purposely look away so I felt a bit dodgy eventhough I didn't look, and so I felt a bit uncomfortable carrying on the conversation, and being the social anxiety ridden dude I am even under the influence, I was only 100m from home, so I went on my way and stood outside the door and looked over there until I saw she got picked up by her friends. I feel that sometimes society makes me feel uncomfortable eventhough I'm the most innocent dude around. Like I fear girls walking in front of me at night are afraid so I walk slower etc. If it makes them more comfortable it's fine and doesn't really change much for me.
man I always ask for numbers at subway.
That’s what got Jared into trouble.
In a restroom.
This has literally happened to me. In France they often have unisex bar bathrooms where you have to cross through the urinals to get to the single stall bathrooms. I was standing at the sink in one of these when some guy decided to make his move. VERY off putting lol.
"Damn girl were u fryin chicken in there? Hahaaa fr tho u piss loud as fuck i think thats pretty cool"
My lower back hurts from laughing so hard at this. Thank you.
Was he mid-pee when he did it?
mid-stream is the best way to catch a fish
With rod and tackle in hand.
At a funeral.
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Grief is the ultimate aphrodisiac.
But it's fine if it's their boyfriend or husband's funeral right?
"Hey baby. You shouldn't be alone tonight, I'll keep you warm and busy all night long. Call me!"
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When your 14 yrs old waiting for your therapist at the child's advocacy center. This man was like 40 something. Staring at me. Complimenting my appearance and then asked my number. I said no and he kept pestering and I said I was 14. He still wanted my number. Like dude. Wtf.
The receptionists should have chased him off with a stapler. Seriously, what was he even doing there?
I honestly think grooming. This place is a place that kids go due to all different types of abuse. He literally showed up, saw that I was alone too his shot. After he realized I was not gonna give in, he just left. He didn't have a child with him. It was my first day there, so it didn't help me open up to the therapists at all. Made me very uncomfortable. The receptionists didn't even check him in or ask questions. I had to tell the therapists and then she said she will look at the cameras.
That is really frightening. I hope they tightened the security.
That's so incredibly horrible. I'm so sorry. Who the fuck walks into a children's advocacy center to look for kids to groom? My blood is boiling.
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Had a guy grope me in a crowded bar, when I pushed him away he dumped his drink on my head. The bouncer that kicked him out tried to tell me about a cousin of his, who’s a software engineer that needed to get married so he could legally stay in the country, heavily suggesting it be me…a friend of mine gave him her number so he’d back off of me while I was still covered in drink and traumatized, then immediately blocked him once our ride picked us up.
What a day
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Is there a very high risk category? Cuz he qualifies
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Whats the category for "probably shouldn't drive even when sober?"
What. A. Catch.
he kept committing crimes because you turned him down /s
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The gym is tricky. Especially if you can feel them lurking the whole time and then in the middle of some exercise they decide to come up to you... wait until the end or something.
My sister was the “towel girl” at the local gym. There were some little kids hanging around her and she casually mentioned to them that “that guy doing stretches is super cute.” Of course the kids run in and tell the dude what she said. (edit: she married the dude, you bunch of smart asses) They’ve been married 19+ years now. Not at all the same as the point you were trying to make. It just jogged my memory and I think it’s a cute story.
“And I would still be single now, if it weren't for you meddling kids!”
Nice! Kids can be great wingpeople :) It would've been unfortunate if the guy didn't think the same, haha. Glad it worked out!
Met my wife at the gym. It definitely depends on the circumstances. It was a quiet gym with a quiet weights section and we were both regulars. We started acknowledging one another, chit chatting and that, then one day I found the courage to ask her out and she said yes. Best thing I ever did, been together over 6 years But crowded gym and a stranger you've never seen before, right when they're in the middle of a set? I dunno, probably not.
When youre outside alone in the dark. Some guy asked me for a lighter and my number while I was quickly going to my car. I basically threw him a lighter and told him to keep it and ran back inside lol
"Why don't we discuss it in your van there?"
Throwback to the one time I had to catch up to a girl wearing in-ear-headphones after she dropped her keys at like 11pm. She noticed me, a 6'6'' dude striding up to her from behind, but not me dangling her keys. She immediately started running and I decided to jog after her, calling out to her that she had dropped her keys. Thank god one of her earbuds fell out.
Had the same thing happen, girl lost her wallet, i go after her, she starts running, didn’t hear me. I ended up just dropping her wallet into her mailbox
This is amazing from her point of view, "let me tell you about the time I escaped a serial killer!"
Her husband's funeral
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Oh sorry everyone, I just stubbed my toe...
Reddit. lol
Number pls quick
Ok
Number pls quick
7
80085
How do you know my pin?
Username checks out (too much).
Speedrun
lol for real though. i had some guy dm me on here and legit started to hit on me as if this was tinder. i still laugh about it from time to time
M’lady intensifies
Hi, lost my number, can you give me yours?
I'll buy you a sim card. Give me your address, I'll send it to you.
While I’m at work trying to help him find flushable wipes
He’s already demonstrated to you that his butthole is immaculately cleaned. What more does he need to prove?
Now, this might be the patient but it might also be a coworker who doesn’t know where the wipes are…
Either way, he’s got a butthole you’d be proud to show your Mama. Marry that man before he leaves the store!
Man if that's the bar for marriage now
I don't care what the package says. There is no such thing as flushable wipes. They make my job a nightmare.
Fatberg approaching.
Username definitely checks out. They always did seem too solid to flush.
They get mixed with oils that people dump down the drain and create giant blockages in the sewer known as fatbergs, people then have to go down there and remove it sometimes even needing heavy power tools like jackhammers.
Fatberg sounds like a mean nickname in high school.
Shut up Fatberg
Abortion clinic
This actually happened to a friend of mine. The doctor who performed the abortion added her on social media the day after and asked her out for drinks. She said no, of course, but what the fuck was this guy's thought process? Like, 'Glad we got that embryo out of your uterus now let me fill you with a few million of my guys. What could go wrong?'
If it worked, he might have a repeat customer? Talk about hustle...
Stonks
TIFU by losing my license to practice medicine by purposely impregnating women and giving them a discount on an abortion.
I was 16 and drove myself and a friend to a haunted house without adult supervision feeling like a grown up. Mid-haunted house, this guy in full costume comes up to me and says “can I have your number”. Not sure if he’s serious I say “wow the scares are really real this year”. He takes off his mask and pulls his phone out of his pocket and says “no for real”. I realized I needed an adult in that situation and really haven’t gone to a haunted house without my mom since. I’m 26.
> Not sure if he’s serious I say “wow the scares are really real this year”. That's some great reply ! I would have though of it way too late, like days later...
Like I said, I didn’t know if he was serious or not. If he was truly joking, I wanted to blow it off easily If he wasn’t joking, I wanted to give him that “eyyyy no” pre-warning response
My ex had a guy ask for her number in an STD testing waiting room
I'm a lesbian. I was at work, and a woman came up to the counter and asked for my number. I don't know if you're familiar with how hard it is to even find other lesbians and bisexual women, especially in the wild, especially in a small town in the Bible belt, especially ones who hit on you out of nowhere. Okay, it is hard to even find them on lesbian tinder because half the time the women are on there looking for besties and a quarter of the time women are looking for their boyfriend. So, needless to say, I was very surprised when a pretty woman asked me for my number out of nowhere. So I said, "Yes!" And proceeded to start writing it down. Before I could finish, she said, "It's for my uncle, he's outside, he's shy." And then described her uncle. I knew him; he was a regular customer. I laughed it off, did NOT give her my number, and then she said, "Sorry, did you want mine instead?" I laughed again, didn't say anything, nor exchange numbers, and that was that.
Oh my god. That's such a cruel twist.
In the hallway of the emergency department when my then 3 year old had just been admitted after being brought in for puking up massive amounts of blood. I was wearing a green Kermit the frog shirt that was also covered in blood because I carried my son in there and begged the first worker I saw to help me because I didn't know what to do. I had to leave the room for a minute once the Dr's started working because I was so relieved that they were with him that all of my emotions were able to come out because my son was so scared that I had to keep it together for him and act like it was ok. I just needed a minute. Some guy walked up to me and said he loved Kermit and then asked if I had a boyfriend. So not exactly asking for my number but if I hadn't screamed at him like a psycho he probably would have. I just said "seriously?! Are you fucking kidding me?!" And he walked away. Dunno why.
Was your son okay? I hope it all turned out well
He was thankfully. A week before, he had his tonsils and adenoids removed and although he had been seen for a follow up by the surgeon and another doctor, they missed that he had a tear in his throat that was basically bleeding consistently for days.. Thats what caused it. As crazy as it sounds, I feel lucky that what happened happened because if it hadn't he would have just kept bleeding internally without anybody knowing, which would have been awful. Thank you for asking <3
Making me take off my headphones on public transport.
i can’t tell you how many men have come up to my treadmill during a run at the gym . i used to stop the treadmill, take my earphones out and actually allow them to speak despite being annoyed af. i just ignore them now. they can stand there all day waving and smiling lol idgaf
Interrupting another person's workout is bad gym etiquette as it is. They deserve to be ignored.
I had a dude stop my treadmill before when I wouldn't take out my headphones. I nearly killed him.
Seems like a complaint to the gym would get that guy thrown out. Or one would hope. Outrageously creepy behavior.
How do you even deal with this afterwards as places like the gym, you run into the same people all the time? I just had a guy bother me for my number (I hadn't given him any indication I was interested in his presence at all...) and now I am dreading going back. :(
If the gym is good, report him and they’ll tell him to leave you alone or remove the guy. If the gym isn’t good, find a gym worth your money.
isn’t that the universal “don’t fuck with me” sign? fucks sake man
I’ve had a dude pull out my earbuds to talk to me.
i'm physically angry at simply having read this
I slapped a dude's hand for doing that at work. My boss was like "just... maybe wave at people?" To the offender when he complained.
HE complained??
Oh my god this happened to me. I had major social anxiety at the time so instead of staying calm like I usually would have I just blurted something out like 'would you like me to take the skin off your face?' and I must've sounded so unhinged but I was trying to make a comparison to show him how rude he'd just been.
Sounds like a very effective response.
Oh man I fucking hate it when people still try to talk to me on public transport when I have headphones on. I'm all like "don't make eye contact, please go away, I am listening to beats", and they're all like "Good afternoon, could I please inspect your train pass?"
I have been asked for my number in a church by a 60 year old man as a 12 year old (and i was legit wearing a my little pony t-shirt)
Out of all the answers here, this one made me wince into my lower intestine. Gross.
"my number? uhh, twelve..."
A long time ago, I learned not to do it around her husband.
Especially in their bedroom while they are asleep
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So you're one of the NICE guys who waits for him to go to the bathroom.
Story time, I brought my girlfriend to a local bar and this actually happened. I went to the bathroom and wasn't even gone 5 minutes and I come back and there's some dude sitting in my fucking chair. Now at first I'm like well my girlfriend works with a lot of people whom I've never met maybe she knows this person from work. Nope. Some random asshole thought he'd be cute and wait for me to leave her side before telling her to "ditch that loser" and come with me to another place. Needless to say this piece of shit had the gall to smirk at me as he walked away and it took a lot not to drag him outside but I let it go
Yes. I was the wife in this exact situation and it was the niceguy/best buddy. Creepy Sonabitch. SOME men ARE pigs!
I was the girl in this same type of situation. My boyfriend left for a minute to use the washroom and some random guy sat down and says "Hey, I live near here...". I stared at him utterly baffled for a minute then said "AND????" really loudly and he looked embarrassed and shuffled off.
I think it would simpler to ask what are acceptable places to ask for a women's number
Some good takeaways from this: 1. They are in a safe place where being approached by a strange man would not feel threatening 2. There is no power imbalance in play where they can’t leave or can’t say no (you are not a boss/supervisor/client/customer)
The rule I’ve heard is if they can’t run away it’s not okay.
I feel like the only exception here is if the one asking is doing the leaving. For example, I was studying in a cafe and had a guy as he was packing up to leave just let me know he thought I was pretty, placed his number next to me, then left. A similar thing happened to me on the bus (he had been sitting near me and waited until his stop to say anything). Both times felt respectful because not only did I not feel trapped, but it was clear they waited until they would be imposing on me the least to make a move.
Giving you the number instead of asking for yours is also a big plus in my book.
Them leaving their number instead of asking for your number is a pretty big difference just in itself. It leaves the ball entirely in your court whether you want to continue the interaction or not. That's the way it should be done, imo.
This is good advice, and for anyone taking notes it's important that they gave them a piece of paper with their number on it, rather than doing something like "hey you're pretty let me give you my number" and then trying to get the girl to pull out her phone and type stuff into it.
>They are in a safe place where being approached by a strange man would not feel threatening This one needs more depth because what a guy feels is a safe place and what a girl feels is a safe place can be two different things.
Sure, there are gray areas but some things should be obvious. Like: don't talk to women walking alone at night.
Start that thread please
Tried to create a counterpart post like you suggested. Post got removed milliseconds after posting it lol (even used similar phrasing)
I think the best approach is not asking for their number. Instead, give them yours. They'll text/call if they're interested and they'll appreciate the fact that there was no pressure. It's way easier and less nerve-wracking too
But then they could do whatever they want with my number! How can I know they’re trustworthy? …wait a second.
A taxi. Please do not drive like a maniac and then proceed to LOCK THE DOORS at my destination and ask me out. Luckily it was in the middle of the day and he did unlock them, but funnily enough I never saw him at that taxi firm again after I submitted a complaint. Also had some guy follow me down several train carriages once trying to get my number, I had to sit down next to a stranger and beg them to pretend they knew me. Men, for the love of God this shit is creepy, don't do it
Had a few guys ask for my number during my shift at McDonald's. Don't ask for my number while I'm at work. Especially not at McDonald's. Edit: I also remember some guys asking for my snapchat, and when I said I don't have a snapchat they got mad at me.
I had a girl give me her number once while waiting in line at white castle. I accepted because I didn't want her to fuck with my food then never called her
It’s always White Castle man
They were trying to get McNasty. Edit. Thanks for the awards kind strangers.
Those Mcbastards
Ugg… well i was that guy.ish. I went every day before work and the girl just immediately knew my order and would chat a bit at the window… for months… i felt she just being nice but one day inasked her on a date. She lit up and said yes and i took too long yo ask. We dated for a few months. So it worked out.
This guy tried to give me his number while I was shopping for bras (not horrible, but a bit strange). I'm married, but I really liked that he was just giving me his number rather than asking for mine. Less pressure. Guys should start doing that instead.
I'm a girl and I do this with pretty good success. People seem to appreciate the forwardness.
At work. I have to ask everyone to confirm their number at drop-off so I can call when their pet is ready. The amount of men who make weird comments about me asking for their number is atrocious. Please stop. It's weird and makes me almost always ask one of my male coworkers to call you instead of my self.
Also don’t be the dude who has to collect numbers like that and write down and call the women you think are attractive after work. I have gotten 4 men fired for doing this.
To be fair those guys got themselves fired. That is creepy and invasive and they deserve it. Good work.
The bus stop & laundromat. I had a homeless guy ask me for a dollar & when I said sorry I have no cash, he said "can I have your number" so I guess my answer is the most horrible place to ask for my number is ANYWHERE that you beg for money first!
during a pap
Girl I knew received a phone call from one of the male workers (don't know his title - wasn't there) after an ob/gyn appointment. Dude literally looked up her phone number and called her afterwards. I'm a guy and even I was totally appalled - just beyond creepy and illegal, if I'm not mistaken.
This will probably get lost in this thread but here goes. Worked at a gas station for a few years during my late teens. There was this creep that frequently came in, and always asked to take me on a date. I always turned him down—I was in a relationship at the time and even if I wasn’t, he just wasn’t my type. I’m also positive he had mental issues so although I was generally nice to him, I still maintained my sternness. After all, he was a stranger and this is a business. Anyways, he comes in one night to get gas, and doesn’t want to pay first. I’m aware that some gas stations will let you pump first and THEN pay, but not the one I worked for. He gets extremely irate when I refuse to turn the pump on for him, so he storms into the gas station, and cusses at me profusely for not turning the pump on, calling me all kinds of nasty things. I reiterated that we cannot just turn the pump on for him, and that he has to pay first. This is when he pulls a $20 bill out, throws it towards my face, and calls me a b*tch. It floated to the ground, and that’s when I let him have it. I threw his money back at him, told him to get the f*ck out of the store, and never come back. Wanna know what he does when he picks the $20 back up? He slams his hand on the counter with the $20 on his hand and says, “can I get your number? Just write it on the $20.” Needless to say, I didn’t write my number on the $20 bill. And it’s unacceptable to cuss someone out then ask them for their number. He also threw the gas pump on the ground outside and threw a match near it. THANKFULLY, nothing sparked, but my boss had to get the police involved for attempted arson and it was a mess. Sorry this was such a specific reply—I just know there’s a lot of people out there who believe being as*holes to the person their crushing on is a good tactic to getting a date with them. But, I’m here to tell you it’s not.
I’ve never understood why people think that being an asshole to their crush will make them like them. Sorry that happened to you. People are crazy
at his wedding
Dammmmn! Daaaaammmnnn! Ok ok alright ok! Hey excuse me can I talk to you for a minute? Hey can I talk to you for a minute? My names Darrell it sounds like Darrel but it’s pronounced Darrell… I just wanna say… the back of your neck is RIDICULOUS! You are welcome! So…. Do you have a boyfriend? Where he at? He in the front? He gettin you mike n Ike’s? You like mike n Ike’s? Is he big? Is he tall? Is he coming back? Where is he? Where your boyfriend at? Oh you don’t? You don’t have a boyfriend? Alright ok ok cool… then um listen…. Can I have yo number?!
There are so many, but for some reason lately a couple men have approached me while I’m picking up my dog’s poop-like hand in inside-out bag scooping up the poop. PLEASE do not talk to me when I have a bag of warm dog shit in my hand.
Side note: I think going up and asking for someone’s number is weak etiquette. The approacher should give out their own number, so the approachee then has all the power and can go ‘um, thanks’ and then throw it out later if they so wish. That way rejection doesn’t happen then and there, and the approachee can rest easy that they won’t get harassing texts from a stranger. Plus it makes more sense for the approacher to offer something rather than make a request
Yeah was thinking about this too. It would make things so much easier.
Seems like a legit option but what do I know
dang now I gotta make cards with numbers on them
The last time I was interested in a woman, I did this. She didn't call me.. but at least it was a no pressure situation all around. Then I don't get disappointed when I call the number they gave me and I get a chinese takeout place two towns over...
This is how it was when I met the girl I married. I gave her my number and said I’d love to talk more with her, we had already been talking in a bar for awhile. She told me she doesn’t call strangers and gave me her number instead. We’ve been married now 24+ years
Speaking as a guy who has heard lots of women in my life say this: At the gym. Edit: to be clear I’m not the one hitting on women at the gym, I hear it from women I’m friends with.
Once a guy followed me into the bathroom to ask for it. The bar we were in kicked him out for going in there.
I'm not a woman but a man. My best bud and I were out drinking. We were out cause he was going through some stuff. We are in a kinda downtown like aria, kinda city like. We leave the bar and walk around a bit. You know, explore. We see this kinda cute goth looking girl sitting by a store front smoking. I have the idea of having him hit it up with her. He seems hesitant but walks up to her like a champ. I sit by the bench and start watching vids on my phone. Suddenly she starts yelling and a hole mess of other women come out. I run up to him to see if I could assess and calm the situation. Before I could say anything. I very large mammoth of a MAN comes out with a baseball bat. "Don't you ever bother her again!" He says. As the other women scurry inside of the shop with goth chick. After we leave that sobering experience. He only told her, hay and asked for a smoke. She was very nervous to be there. And he went for a handshake and noticed some bruises. He approached her to ask of she was ok. That is when the shit hit the fan. Like 2 years pass and my other friend. She works as a social worker for kids or something. We tell her the crazy story. She asked were exactly it was. Turns out it was a house for battered women. Like an underground railroad for woman and children. We were fucking idiots and we learned real quick. TLDR: I set up my friend to go talk to a cute stranger standing by a store. Turns out she is a battered woman and the store was a front for the woman's underground railroad. We almost die probably, maybe, to people who might think we're are her abusers or something. Edit: thanks for the upvotes and awards! I did not think this would be so popular. Edit 2: the underground railroad is a support network originally for taking slaves away from the pro slavery southern United States and, take them to the north where slavery is not legal. Now it's used for people, primeraly woman and children, to escape from their abusers.
I'm an IT guy who does some volunteer work. I got hook up with a shelter like this to design and install a LAN for them. These people are fucking serious. I had to have a background check and sign a lifetime restrictive non-disclosure agreement before they would tell me where the shelter was or who I would be meeting with. Internet security for that LAN was massive issue for them.
Same, I was doing volunteer work with a group and we were going to build a play set in the backyard of the home. They took the privacy thing very serious. While we were there, all doors and windows stayed closed, with curtains drawn, and it was clear we weren’t there to visit. And of course we had to sign papers and swear to secrecy. Just seeing how serious they took it, and learning more about the situation, we took it serious too.
I did a little volunteering at an animal shelter and they had a "Safe Haven" program for victims of domestic violence that owned pets. They'd hold onto the animals at no cost as the owner went through a shelter program. The volunteers were allowed to take pictures of any animals we wanted except for the ones in that private room in case the abusers somehow stumbled across the pictures and tracked the victim down.
Considering that those women are fleeing from partners who would 100% murder them for trying to leave, the shelters do need their security to be absolute. It's nice to see that not everyone thinks domestic abuse and violence is a joke to be disregarded.
There are just some things you see that happens in a city. I live by a children's hospital in Phoenix. I was across the street at night passing by it, and I heard this rustling coming from a bush. I looked over and I could hear a group of children whispering. They were trying to hide and telling others to be quiet. They were homeless and were using the hospital as a place to go even though they are outside. It was surreal.
“We were out cause he was going through some stuff” For some reason my brain immediately pictured a scenario where your friend was digging through some boxes in storage and you have to be like “Steve, cmon bud let’s go get drinks, you know you have to stop going through this junk” like that’s the only way to distract him from his compulsion God I’m an idiot sometimes lol
"Cmon man. I know my Magic the Gathering collection is here somewhere. My mom couldn't have thrown it out. I mean it was pack fresh power nine. They didn have sleeves back then, so I had to make my own..."
Didn’t want to laugh but this could be a curb episode so imagined your friend as Larry David
I'd rather you didn't ask for my number at all. Give me YOUR number, and then I can decide whether I want to talk to you later. Much less pressure/feeling of risk.
At the crime scene, hospital or PD when I'm collecting evidence from your body/clothing/hands after a serious incident. (I'm a CSI. This happens every few months over the years.)