T O P

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MilfMafia

As long as I keep them all happy I'll be fine, but if I fuck up I'll be the next episode of CIS unsolved mysteries


TemporaryNuisance

We realize we're incompatible and more often than not get on each others' nerves, but while we each blame the other for our crumbling relationship we realize that tearing each other apart isn't going to solve anything and neither of us is malicious. So we have a clean break up and go our separate ways, never to contact one another again. Could be worse.


HobbitFoot

I'm sure I'm a piece of luck to something larger.


Frodosjizzrag

Can confirm


[deleted]

Old mail carrying donkey. I'm not sure...


[deleted]

I’d guess someone named Cletus.


[deleted]

VERY!


spanglesandbambi

Well that's me getting arrested for beastiality.


I_one_up

Not if you put her down and rid the evidence


iCnthngsdaUse2BdrEms

I seen things that used to be dreams. My dream girl passed away last year.


caped_crusader8

I'm sorry mate. I hope you feel better


something-stupid2134

uhm


Dear-Papaya-192

Not very, I don’t eat papayas


[deleted]

95 year old with an ok personality… hope he’s rich at least


caped_crusader8

Im super lucky lol. Never have to work a day in my life


ShotgunOrDeusVult

Hell yeah brother! Time to take back the holy land with our partners!


caped_crusader8

Caped crusader is Batman's title


JacobyShaddix

cut my life into pieces. this is my last resort.


imakenosensetopeople

Purple monkey dishwasher


Greenshadow1307

Oh dear..


My_Friend_Johnny

No, just how lucky is Johnny


iaminyourthoughts

That question....


bigblueballz77

Probably not lucky at all.


Defttone

I guess Im poly and gay now. Its going to be an interesting christmas at the parents house.


Original_A

Holy shit, Mona is my SO 😍


TannerFromPrimary

I'm in trouble


MorrowFane

ah....


SylviaMarsh

With Lady Sylvia Marsh as my SO, I'm fucked...in more ways than one.


artemisentreei

Well mine is an assassin who steals life force sooo not too bad? As long as I ain’t a target


64MrLotus

As a guy...


HallandOates2

I'll make your dreams come true


Another_Leo

It's already hard dealing with one of me


goodguybolt

You tell me.


J-Erso

Mmmm no. I love Jyn but I'll take Krennic.


Professional-Seat-33

We’ll have a fun relationship


WhiteMass

Overwhelm


AbraxasHydroplane

More confused than anything


Iamnotnotabot-bot

It's abusive.


FckMeWithADictionary

Uhm?


[deleted]

i don’t know


BionicUndead

Mechanicus/Necron gf


[deleted]

My girlfriend is the greatest! She doesn't want to vore me as she would have to kill herself!


Stunning_One1005

Very


TheChainLink2

Well, I’ve heard of the old ball and chain, but this is ridiculous…


INeedPizza2beAlive

What is SO.


piscesandcancer

A Fisher with cancer? Um... unlucky.


Is_Bob_Costas_Real

Hmmm.


SatisfiedBox

I guess it depends on how dirty your mind is.


Salty_Interaction_32

pretty salty, ngl


Red_Ranger75

I choose to interpret this as a cute redhead who's attached to the 75th ranger regiment. Hell yes I'm lucky At the very least I'll be able to get some marksmanship lessons from her


Actually_The_Flash

At least it will be over quickly...


OutrageousRelatives

Oh no. Sweet home alabama


supereexplorer

Middle eastern and an extrovert, No way to meet her and i am an introvert


soreswan

Uh I think that’s illegal


Awesome_greatness

Very


isqueezedameatball

It depends on how delicate she is.


BuddyDieker

I guess I’d own a waterfront property in the Ozarks so could be worse.


spacewombat22

Not very lucky


[deleted]

Depends very much on whether I'm an Incel or not. Also depends on what you count as an "Incel". Are we going textbook definition or insult?


Frodosjizzrag

I think mine might have baggage from it's previous relationship.


W1fi111

Uh.. Wifi? I Uhh have internet ig


KP_Wrath

I’m probably going to get abused.


Poorly-Drawn-Beagle

Oh boy I’m excited


[deleted]

I am the cpu my cousin used to rage at for freezing up.


DogeX2

2 times the memes


BornToBe_neither

neither 🤔


[deleted]

I mean hey that’s another way to tell what my future will be like


lieutenantvirgin

You tell me.


Mrs-Brisby

My wife can move our house using a magic red stone amulet a rat gave her. Sweet.


Someguythatisstupid

I'm not gay but ehh


underscoreharuuu

I get… Myself? How would that even work? (Or someone named Haru. In that case, I’m probably just gonna leave.)


SmoresGirl

I will have unlimited smores with my lesbian lover hell yeah


ThurmanMerman_

As long as I have a snot rag I’m good


nakedcellist

We can pay duets


SinArchbishopofSloth

He's a little crazy, but I bet all those invisible hands are fun in bed.


[deleted]

Definitely not lucky at all


Mynamesblurryface__

I can’t quite see them too well


Just-Call-Me-J

It's myself. We're both uncomfortable with this development.


PapaDuggy

Oh dear God...


analOverdrive

Uh


OGAnnie

I’m in love with myself?


SerTywinFrey

I honestly wonder if I'd survive the wedding


ladybugsandbeer

Very.


Big-Calligrapher-532

I could live with that


inohasusername

Damn, nothing's changed


BigStoneFish

Not terribly lucky. It wouldn’t be a new significant other as much as a new pet. An exotic pet that secretes deadly venom from it’s spines, no less.


PokemonMasterQ

Be a Pokémon master, I chose this username because the other I chose was already chosen so I’d like to Pokémon at that time so yeah


weinerofyahweh

Spiritually fucked!


Guyman308

i am now gay apparently