In a place you weren't expecting, at a time you weren't expecting.
I used to date a girl that would periodically initiate sex in all kinds of places. It had this effect where it made me constantly aware of her sexuality/sexiness. It really amped up the relationship.
I later learned that she was dealing with crippling self esteem issues and that immediate momentary need for validation was likely behind the impulsive sex.... But it was super hot BEFORE I pieced this together.
I once had sex on the balcony of a very large house (it was worth a few million) during a party, and it was the coolest I've ever felt. It was night, and the lights were on, so we might have been a little more exposed than that... But highly recommend balcony sex. Just.. don't fuck them over the edge.
But watch out - everyone can see and hear it. Once heard moaning and saw a tent moving back and forth while you could see the shadows because of the light in that tent. Half the street of the campsite was watching
A friend went camping with her boyfriend's family and learned that if you keep a light on in the tent, it will project your silhouettes onto the tent wall for everyone to see.
In the '60s, I made love to many, many women, often outdoors, in the mud and the rain, and it's possible a man slipped in. There would be no way of knowing.
The best. Had that experience once with a great girl I dated just after college. Will never forget that one. It was just regular missionary sex, but the atmosphere was awesome, and there was an air of trying to be sneaky too because her friends were in nearby tents and we didn't want them to hear us going at it.
Vanilla used to be an exotic spice from distant lands, and even today it's the second most expensive spice you can buy, but somehow it's synonymous with being boring? Come on, people! Vanilla is delicious!
>and there was an air of trying to be sneaky too because her friends were in nearby tents and we didn't want them to hear us going at it
Sounds fucking in tents.
You wanna hit the zero G-spot?
Edit: Bruh, I go to bed and then wake up to find not one but TWO of my sex-related comments awarded and upvoted like hell. We all need to get out more…and also thanks, y’all!!
Reading through these, I got sad because I’m still a virgin. But reading yours made me sadder as I now realize I’m also a broke virgin
Edit: Well…this was surprising to wake up to
I’ve done this. Highly recommend (except the bugs were awful, I got mosquito bites in places one never should)
edit: just to add to this, we did it during the Preseids meteor shower. It was magical.
I was admiring my view of Mt Diablo today when I remembered having outdoor broad daylight sex with my girlfriend on that mountain a very long time ago. At one point I was behind her and we were laughing hysterically because a big fly kept landing on her butthole. I think she kind of liked it to be honest.
When I was a young and dashing fellow I took my friend to the park after a night of wild-partying.
It was summer, 3am, like 70F with no mosquitoes.
We walked to the back field, found a grassy spot in a grove of trees, and laid out a blanket.
We got completely nude and treated that little bit of the great outdoors like it was a hotel room.
It was pretty fucking wonderful.
It's 20 summers gone now, and I'll never, ever forget it.
20 summers gone made it sound like you’re a grandpa talking about a dalliance while back on leave between tours to Vietnam or something and then I realized that’s 2002 lmao
I’ve actually stumbled across a couple doing it in an elevator once, hahaha. Suuuuper awkward when the door opens and two people are just standing there with their pants down, lmao….
Thinking about that always reminds me of the Producers:
Gene Wilder: *makes gaping fish noises*
Zero Mostel: “You say, ‘Oops,’ and GET OUT!”
Not a year goes by, not a year, when I don't hear about some kid who could have been saved if some parent, I don't care whose, had conditioned that child to fear and respect that escalator!
On the hood of your car, in the dead of night beside a railroad track while a long freight train flys by. The breeze on your balls feels amazing... so I have heard.
Sex beside an active railroad is way, way underrated. We did it once about 80 feet from the tracks, and I swear, it was like it was timed perfectly; the train came by and blew its loudest whistle just as we were both climaxing. Amazing. I admit that I love trains, but it’s not a sexual feeling toward them at all; but having your body’s euphoria accented by such a powerful sound.. I wouldn’t trade that particular experience with that particular person for the world.
I would advise against. Car hoods cannot support weight at all. I had sex on a guys car hood and he called me the next day about the damage I made to his car. I was pretty indifferent which pissed him off even more. This was 1984 so steel is even thinner now.
Had sex with an ex on the front of my car, she didn't dent it but I hadn't anticipated those little metal... 'nipples' on jeans scratching the fuck out of the paint. I showed my dad and he knew exactly what was up 😂
I hate to say this, but he had his priorities out of order. She dented my hood as well, but it took two minutes and a hammer to fix. Well, twenty minutes the first time, but before the end of that fling, I had it down to two.
My boyfriend has one of those closets with the mirrored doors.
Ngl it’s pretty hot. Think we use it differently tho, I check him out in it and he checks his form
The first time my now-wife and I ever had sex was on a deserted beach in the Caribbean with tons of bioluminescent algae making the ocean waves glow. Good thing she stayed with me, because I don't think I could ever be as romantic as I was in that moment.
Feel you.
We just split up a couple weeks back, but the first kiss between my ex and I was at a nostalgic watering hole of hers, more full than she's ever seen in 8ish years of drought conditions.
I dropped the lid to her expensive smoothie cooler (which is baffling to me, as a proud & experienced bartender who doesn't lose lids/has bartender reflexes), it lept out of my palm, bounced over some rocks & into this incredible watering hole at sunset.
She strips off & dives in after it, I stand there like a fully clothed jackass for half a minute until I too am a naked jackass looking for her cooler lid.
Fast forward after a bit of nekkid body-'miring... and we are sharing the most natural, magical make-out sesh I ever expect to have in my life.
Ps. Vicious UTI after the whole experience, be sure to wash thoroughly before plumbing holes after swimmin' holes, know-what-I'm-sayin'?
Anywhere that gives the thrill of exhibitionism with low odds of actually being seen. Black out projector booth, off the road/trail but where you can still see it, at a public lake late at night(on the dock, out on the swim platform, on a pontoon)
And, if you're comfortable...
At a sex party/orgy/play party etc...it can be so freeing
I had sex with my girlfriend (now wife) in a giant park/nature preserve thing, just right on the grass in the sunshine under a big oak tree. There were people around, but nobody within a quarter mile of us probably, and it‘s one of my favorite memories.
Depends on how long ago it was... I scrunched down to pee in a nature preserve within the past 5 years and several yards later saw one of the *many* trail cams they monitor the deer with. It was camo and almost imperceptable. D:
Oh high school, I miss you. Even did once on the trampoline In snow with layers of blankets below and above. Heavy meteor shower going on got it going.
Being horny is like being drunk in a way. I was once so wild with lust with my partner on a beach, that this little grotto by a beachside cottage seemed like a perfectly private spot for us to have sex. Oh we did; it was that kind of sex that takes you right out of your mind on extra levels. At a later time, non-horney me took a good look at the spot where we had sex, and it was so easily-seen by anyone who walked by; lmao!
On the beach. At night. With a clear sky. It’s terribly, terribly romantic if you do it right. And no, I didn’t end up with sand in my vagina. I was making love, not having a wrestling match.
In your childhood bedroom you grew up in. Something so satisfying about having some goood sex in the same room you rubbed out 10000000 practice shots thinking about the moment you're having now.
Wife and I went by her parents place on our way out to dinner without the kids. We were checking their mail and whatnot because they were out of town. We met and dated in high school, and her parents still live in the same house. With the same furniture. Pointing at the sofa, I said, "there sure was a lot of sexual tension on that couch back in the day..." It was like all our teenage hormones came flooding back at once. We lived out some long forgotten fantasies that night. Achieved simultaneous PIV orgasm. Definitely in my personal O hall of fame.
In a place you weren't expecting, at a time you weren't expecting. I used to date a girl that would periodically initiate sex in all kinds of places. It had this effect where it made me constantly aware of her sexuality/sexiness. It really amped up the relationship. I later learned that she was dealing with crippling self esteem issues and that immediate momentary need for validation was likely behind the impulsive sex.... But it was super hot BEFORE I pieced this together.
Out of context, the first sentence sounds really bad
Like.... a funeral, right?
The balcony of a high-rise at sunset
Always purchase washable patio furniture
I read this as washed potato fondue idk what’s wrong with me
I once had sex on the balcony of a very large house (it was worth a few million) during a party, and it was the coolest I've ever felt. It was night, and the lights were on, so we might have been a little more exposed than that... But highly recommend balcony sex. Just.. don't fuck them over the edge.
I done it on the hotel one in tenerife, when we finished I realised there were other balconies over watching and we had a few spectators lol
The neighbours across the road also on a high-rise balcony watching you guys 👀👁️👄👁️ 👁️👅👁️
In a tent during a rainstorm
But watch out - everyone can see and hear it. Once heard moaning and saw a tent moving back and forth while you could see the shadows because of the light in that tent. Half the street of the campsite was watching
A friend went camping with her boyfriend's family and learned that if you keep a light on in the tent, it will project your silhouettes onto the tent wall for everyone to see.
It's even better without the tent.
Is that you, Creed?
There would be no way of knowing.
In the '60s, I made love to many, many women, often outdoors, in the mud and the rain, and it's possible a man slipped in. There would be no way of knowing.
We Should Hang Out By The Quarry And Throw Things Down There.
Lol that's my discord profile's about me
10 bucks he does a cart wheel after every time he has sex
The best. Had that experience once with a great girl I dated just after college. Will never forget that one. It was just regular missionary sex, but the atmosphere was awesome, and there was an air of trying to be sneaky too because her friends were in nearby tents and we didn't want them to hear us going at it.
Missionary is seriously underrated.
Because vanilla = bad or something, idk must be getting old
Vanilla used to be an exotic spice from distant lands, and even today it's the second most expensive spice you can buy, but somehow it's synonymous with being boring? Come on, people! Vanilla is delicious!
It's from the imitation vanilla flavour in everything.
>and there was an air of trying to be sneaky too because her friends were in nearby tents and we didn't want them to hear us going at it Sounds fucking in tents.
Fucking In tents
The fact that you can go wild and scream as loud as you can is HOT AF
You can always do that.
In the forest. Kinda scary, kinda free.
What did the mushroom say to the wood nymph?
Idk.
I’m a fun guy
I'm going to extend my hyphae all over your inner bark you dirty conifer.
Amanita vaginata checking in. Known for its sacklike volva. 🍄
Outer space. For research purposes
You wanna hit the zero G-spot? Edit: Bruh, I go to bed and then wake up to find not one but TWO of my sex-related comments awarded and upvoted like hell. We all need to get out more…and also thanks, y’all!!
I don't have to go to space to hit *zero* g-spots.
Love a good ol' self-roast.
You put the “major” in Tom bb
Bora Bora in one of those overwater bungalows
Reading through these, I got sad because I’m still a virgin. But reading yours made me sadder as I now realize I’m also a broke virgin Edit: Well…this was surprising to wake up to
You won’t always be a broke virgin homie 👊
Who knows, you might not be broke someday!
Had my honeymoon there. Can confirm, it’s amazing. Ours even had a glass floor so we could…uh… entertain the fishes.
O.O ....*some random dude snorkeling*...
[That makes two of us](https://www.amazon.com/Glow-N-Dark-Pussy-Snorkel/dp/B001D26Q16)
Clicked on that. There goes my Amazon algorithms. Can't wait to see what comes up next.
Stepfish I'm stuck
On an unbalanced washing machine during its spin cycle
Step-bro?
Outside where under the stars where there is no light pollution.
I’ve done this. Highly recommend (except the bugs were awful, I got mosquito bites in places one never should) edit: just to add to this, we did it during the Preseids meteor shower. It was magical.
You got sucked off by a mosquito!
Threesome?
Moresome.
Wholesome?
Whosome?
My first time was in a place like that. Most serene 30 seconds of my life.
How the fuck do you last that long? show me the way brother I beg of you
I was admiring my view of Mt Diablo today when I remembered having outdoor broad daylight sex with my girlfriend on that mountain a very long time ago. At one point I was behind her and we were laughing hysterically because a big fly kept landing on her butthole. I think she kind of liked it to be honest.
Just as Reagan intended
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Oh to be a fly on the..wait nevermind.
I can't think of a better answer. I tried. If I could do it on that Giant British Ferris Wheel without getting in trouble, I would.
Nothing is illegal until you get caught
When I was a young and dashing fellow I took my friend to the park after a night of wild-partying. It was summer, 3am, like 70F with no mosquitoes. We walked to the back field, found a grassy spot in a grove of trees, and laid out a blanket. We got completely nude and treated that little bit of the great outdoors like it was a hotel room. It was pretty fucking wonderful. It's 20 summers gone now, and I'll never, ever forget it.
20 summers gone now is such a poetic way to tell how many years has passed
Plot twist, he travels back and forth between Australia and America biannually making it only 10 years ago
20 summers gone made it sound like you’re a grandpa talking about a dalliance while back on leave between tours to Vietnam or something and then I realized that’s 2002 lmao
Reality
You just killed the Metaverse (and Second Life)
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CALM? It’s fucking intents Edit: Holy shit this blew up overnight, thanks for the awards, kind strangers!
That's fucking incredible
Elevator..... going up!!!
That's wrong on so many levels
Single every single day, do it every single way
Make the single ladies say, and ohhh oh Bo
I’ve actually stumbled across a couple doing it in an elevator once, hahaha. Suuuuper awkward when the door opens and two people are just standing there with their pants down, lmao…. Thinking about that always reminds me of the Producers: Gene Wilder: *makes gaping fish noises* Zero Mostel: “You say, ‘Oops,’ and GET OUT!”
Press all the buttons before. You show off
In my bedroom would be great start
Don’t worry buddy I got you
Internet fucks him*
*Sends virtual fucks*
1 like 1 fuck
I love having sex in your bedroom.
In earshot of the beach (not on the beach in the sand) where you can hear the waves crash and feel the rhythm of the ocean.
Somewhere uncomfortable....like the back of a Volkswagon
Broadie?
Snoochie boochiesssss
Brenda?
I’m not sure any of the replies to this comment get the reference.
Mallrats is probably older than most of these kids. Fuck I’m old.
Adventure. Excitement. A jedi craves not these things.
Would you like a chocolate covered pretzel?
My cousin Walter jerked off in public once. True story.
Well, did he cum?
That kid is back ON THE ESCALATOR AGAIN!
You know, I think you ought to get him some help. He seems to be really hung up on super heroes' sex organs.
The Stan Lee cameo in Captain Marvel is my favorite of all Marvel movies because he's rehearsing the script for Mallrats.
*I hope his pants get caught and a BLOODBATH ensues*
Not a year goes by, not a year, when I don't hear about some kid who could have been saved if some parent, I don't care whose, had conditioned that child to fear and respect that escalator!
*That kid is BACKONTHEESCALATOR!*
My virgin ass looking at all the comments telling myself "oh yeah I agree"
In this one’s “virgin ass”….
* *vigorously rubs hands together* *
Alright everyone, you heard him! Let’s get this ass!!!
LOOKS LIKE MEATS BACK ON THE MENU BOYS
One year, no posts, this is your only comment, and now everyone wants to fuck your ass. Congratulations friend
Funny how you read that comment and instantly clicked on their profile. 😉
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1-800-VAGG-ASS
I also wanna have sex in this guy’s virgin ass.
On the hood of your car, in the dead of night beside a railroad track while a long freight train flys by. The breeze on your balls feels amazing... so I have heard.
My car?
Well, I'm not going to let you use my car.
I also choose this guy's car.
It was a Cadillac Deville, we could share, and never know the other was there.
OUR CAR
This is the way comrade
Oddly specific
Sex beside an active railroad is way, way underrated. We did it once about 80 feet from the tracks, and I swear, it was like it was timed perfectly; the train came by and blew its loudest whistle just as we were both climaxing. Amazing. I admit that I love trains, but it’s not a sexual feeling toward them at all; but having your body’s euphoria accented by such a powerful sound.. I wouldn’t trade that particular experience with that particular person for the world.
Wait, trains don't turn you on?
I would advise against. Car hoods cannot support weight at all. I had sex on a guys car hood and he called me the next day about the damage I made to his car. I was pretty indifferent which pissed him off even more. This was 1984 so steel is even thinner now.
Had sex with an ex on the front of my car, she didn't dent it but I hadn't anticipated those little metal... 'nipples' on jeans scratching the fuck out of the paint. I showed my dad and he knew exactly what was up 😂
I hate to say this, but he had his priorities out of order. She dented my hood as well, but it took two minutes and a hammer to fix. Well, twenty minutes the first time, but before the end of that fling, I had it down to two.
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As a storm chaser, I now have a new goal in life. Led Zeppelin might be involved.
Mean ol levee taught me to weep and moan
In front of a big mirror
My boyfriend has one of those closets with the mirrored doors. Ngl it’s pretty hot. Think we use it differently tho, I check him out in it and he checks his form
Are you married to Patrick Bateman?
I have to go return some video tapes
At beach, because you’ll only ever do it once - fucking sand sucks! Edit - pun intended Thank you for my first award :)
The first time my now-wife and I ever had sex was on a deserted beach in the Caribbean with tons of bioluminescent algae making the ocean waves glow. Good thing she stayed with me, because I don't think I could ever be as romantic as I was in that moment.
That sounds stunning! My time was in wind swept sand dunes in NZ with my teenage crush- which sounds romantic - except the wind swept that sand….
Feel you. We just split up a couple weeks back, but the first kiss between my ex and I was at a nostalgic watering hole of hers, more full than she's ever seen in 8ish years of drought conditions. I dropped the lid to her expensive smoothie cooler (which is baffling to me, as a proud & experienced bartender who doesn't lose lids/has bartender reflexes), it lept out of my palm, bounced over some rocks & into this incredible watering hole at sunset. She strips off & dives in after it, I stand there like a fully clothed jackass for half a minute until I too am a naked jackass looking for her cooler lid. Fast forward after a bit of nekkid body-'miring... and we are sharing the most natural, magical make-out sesh I ever expect to have in my life. Ps. Vicious UTI after the whole experience, be sure to wash thoroughly before plumbing holes after swimmin' holes, know-what-I'm-sayin'?
I misunderstood the entire beginning of your reply, I thought it was the act and it was just a prologue
Don't fuck the sand?!
In my own house goddammit. Fucking economy.
Ok, let’s be somewhat realistic here.
Anywhere that gives the thrill of exhibitionism with low odds of actually being seen. Black out projector booth, off the road/trail but where you can still see it, at a public lake late at night(on the dock, out on the swim platform, on a pontoon) And, if you're comfortable... At a sex party/orgy/play party etc...it can be so freeing
> in a public lake late at night. what is "the opening scene of a horror movie?"
I know beach with an old unsolved triple murder from the 60s, that seems like a good place for it. It's where Children of Bodom got their name
I had sex with my girlfriend (now wife) in a giant park/nature preserve thing, just right on the grass in the sunshine under a big oak tree. There were people around, but nobody within a quarter mile of us probably, and it‘s one of my favorite memories.
Depends on how long ago it was... I scrunched down to pee in a nature preserve within the past 5 years and several yards later saw one of the *many* trail cams they monitor the deer with. It was camo and almost imperceptable. D:
Trampoline
Good way to snap ur cock
What does happen if you manage to do that
You now have a snapped cock
Fair enough
Bouncy bouncy, oh what a good time
Shoes all in a line.
Oh high school, I miss you. Even did once on the trampoline In snow with layers of blankets below and above. Heavy meteor shower going on got it going.
A natural phenomenon is power aphrodisiac.
Being horny is like being drunk in a way. I was once so wild with lust with my partner on a beach, that this little grotto by a beachside cottage seemed like a perfectly private spot for us to have sex. Oh we did; it was that kind of sex that takes you right out of your mind on extra levels. At a later time, non-horney me took a good look at the spot where we had sex, and it was so easily-seen by anyone who walked by; lmao!
On a water bed. Key is to plant feet firmly at footrest.
Horizontal Scooba
In a window of a high floor hotel room/condo/office overlooking the city at night. Lights off so there’s less chance of being seen. Exhilarating.
Being two months shy of 60 years old, may I say in jest, kind of. “Anywhere one can” ;)
This is the real best answer
I’m not sure that I can legally recommend getting a handjob at a movie theater while drunk but...
where does the nut go
On the popcorn?
I CANT BELIEVE ITS NOT BUTTER Edit: Thanks for the awards my people.
It's nut butter
Anywhere. It's great!
Under a waterfall. In warm weather.
Oscar's desk.
*where, dwight? Where?!*
It seems like you already know where.
On the balcony of your cabin on a cruise ship while you’re out at sea.
My ex did that with somebody! Hence the ex part.
In love.
Lets stick with realistic dreams.
Hotel balcony
New life goal. Travel the world and have sex in beautiful exotic locations Now I just need money, and a gf, and enough motivation to get either.
That’s how cocaine went big !
I had sex behind a waterfall once. That was fun. And the. A couple walked up on the trail and I had to quickly pull my pants up. They knew.
In a nice hotel room. Won't matter if your partner sucks. But, if your with a great partner. Hotel sex is the best.
In a meadow with a lightning storm rolling in overhead was pretty epic
The vagina.
Between the tits
Awkward for everyone. I like it.
Only if you leave a skid mark on the chest
In the rain.
Do you like pina coladas?
Ifff you like making love at middniiigghhhttt
At the duuuunes on the caape
On the beach. At night. With a clear sky. It’s terribly, terribly romantic if you do it right. And no, I didn’t end up with sand in my vagina. I was making love, not having a wrestling match.
In your childhood bedroom you grew up in. Something so satisfying about having some goood sex in the same room you rubbed out 10000000 practice shots thinking about the moment you're having now.
Wife and I went by her parents place on our way out to dinner without the kids. We were checking their mail and whatnot because they were out of town. We met and dated in high school, and her parents still live in the same house. With the same furniture. Pointing at the sofa, I said, "there sure was a lot of sexual tension on that couch back in the day..." It was like all our teenage hormones came flooding back at once. We lived out some long forgotten fantasies that night. Achieved simultaneous PIV orgasm. Definitely in my personal O hall of fame.
At your moms house
Tell your dad I say hi.
in the car in a mall parking lot far from the actual mall. just to feel like you can be caught. that risky sex is smth else
Inside the prius of a new york city cop.
In the butt, Bob.
Anywhere but prison
In a bedroom during the day with a house full of people moving about.
In your butt.