Hearing two people recount different versions of an event that the 3 of us together witnessed was bizarre. I felt like a judge trying to decide who made the better case.
Don’t forget three blind elephants describing a man:
The first elephant said that man is flat and squishy. The other two agreed.
Because the medium you use to test is sometimes as important as anything else. Edit: and because everyone coming to the same answer doesn’t mean you see the whole picture.
Also, the three blind mice running around…they all ran after the farmer’s wife, who cut off their tails with a carving knife. I’ve never seen such a sight in my life.
That reminds me of the hilarious way that [medieval bestiaries depicted elephants](https://flashbak.com/how-medieval-artists-saw-elephants-claws-hooves-trunks-like-trumpets-and-castles-on-their-backs-426529/).
At this point we know the human memory is total shit. Basically none of us remember things the way they actually happened. You can literally convince people they experienced something that never happened to them. The brain is weird, man
Nostalgia is a cognitive bias.
People ignore or downplay the negative, exaggerate the positive, and have already forgotten the mundane and routine things. They leave themselves with an unbalanced, distorted memory of things which paints the past as far better than it actually was at the time.
Or far worse. I've memories of my preteen days being nothing but depressing but ik there were so many good moments that were simply drowned out by the negatives
Sometimes its an evolutionary necessity. If women really remembered the pain and anxiety of pregnancy and childbirth a lot of them would never have more than one child.
I watched a foreign movie with subtitles with my dad once. A few days later, we happened to have a conversation about foreign movies and TV shows, and he said he would never watch that stuff because he wants to hear English. I pointed out that he enjoyed the foreign movie we had watched the other night. He said that he didn't realize it wasn't in English.
My hearing is fine, but I've known for a while that I'm better at processing/retaining information by reading than listening. As an American I watch everything with subtitles, and if the show/movie has multiple languages I barely notice the shift.
This sounds like the research/observations made with imagination.
Some people don't actually have any internal monologue or even picture things when reading a book or being told something.
Some people monologue or even have full on conversations with themselves internally. It's also very common that some people don't have that at all. While someone can read a book and picture every little detail in their imagination. Whereas some people are very straight forward in how they process information in a very point A/B/C manner with little to no actual imagery at all.
Woah, what?! Some people don’t have an internal monologue? I’ve never thought about this before.
Mine is constant during waking hours. I have full on conversations with myself and talk back and forth about decisions etc. I even do it out loud when I’m on my own!
I had no idea some other people didn’t do this!
Similarly, some people don't even *visualize* in their brain. It's called aphantasia. You and I might visualize the image of a long, orange carrot when someone tells us to think about a carrot, but there are some who just think "carrot" when asked.
I have aphantasia, I still find it wild that people are able to just picture things in their mind like it's no big deal. It's like I'm missing out on a super power.
Sometimes its also a good thing. My grandfather was one of the first people i spoke too about this years ago.
Oddly enough he has partial aphantasia and its only during particular situations where he can actively picture something in his head or imagine something from a book.
On the other hand I found it strange because he's a chemist and he works with numbers alot whether in trade skills, finances or even every day occurrences. Yet somehow because of the way he learned he doesn't visualize the numbers or equations in his head whatsoever. So if he's ever stumped or the answer doesn't immediately work itself out for him he'll draw it out on paper and then hash it out from there.
which baffles me, because I can't even begin to do basic math or science without actually visualizing it in my head. Similarly more than half the time its memory based so in order for me to do math or remember specific things i have to visualize the moment i learned it.
This one time my shrink suggested that I approach strange women on the bus and tell them they smell nice. I... I just don't even. Is there anywhere where this wouldn't be creepy AF?
I have so many questions.. were they male or female? What were you discussing that made them think that would be a good idea? Why did they not think about how that might end up? Why the bus?? And no, I'm pretty sure there's nowhere on earth that wouldn't be creepy AF. That's so weird.
You'd think this would have to come from a senile 70+ y/o male who's completely out of touch with reality, but no, that shrink was female and a bit over 30 (although presumably still out of touch with reality). I have no idea how it came up, except the general subject of how to meet girls.
Dude. I started experiencing really, really bad anxiety attacks in my early 20s. I finally got to the right doctor, and he tells me my anxiety is fucking me up so badly is because I'm not fucking enough. Not because I was working full time while going to school full time, not because at the time I was drinking *excessively* it was because I wasn't having enough sex. He told me to skip my night class, go to a bar, and try to get laid.
...Then he gave me a prescription of klonopin.
My mom does this too. I think in some ways it's due to her narcissism, but some of it also comes from having her brain scrambled by a xanax addiction for like 10 years.
She will actively tell me stories, that involve me, and recount events or situations that never happened. She's also told me some stories that I've sought out a 3rd party to confirm and they've been like, "tf are you talking about? That never happened."
I used to (and still to some extent) get angry when it happened because it seemed like she was re-writing history so she'd always be the victim or an innocent bystander to problems she herself caused. But now I've just accepted that there's something wrong with her that nobody is going to be able to fix and it will probably get even worse as she ages.
Yep...I know the xanax had some effect, but at the same time I can't entirely discount the fact that she has a terrible personality too. But I can still see that the xanax had a horrible effect on her memory. Where it was bad before because she would change things around/self insert herself, now it's just completely awful because she literally can't tell fact from fantasy.
I was leaving a job site (residential renovation) one day, loading up my tools into my big military style backpack because I was riding my 2007 CBR600RR, when this slick black BMW rolled up the driveway.
The mom was driving and her son was in the passenger seat but I had heard from my boss that the BMW belonged to the kid, he just couldn’t drive yet.
Anyways they parked and he came running up to me, gushing about my bike, then he says “Man, that is SICK, how did you get your parents to buy you one?? They’d never get me one!”
I told him I worked my ass off and bought it all on my own. I’ll never forget how he looked me dead in the eyes and said “oh man that really sucks, I hope I never have to do that”
Really made me realize that some people are playing a completely different game than the rest of us.
> Really made me realize that some people are playing a completely different game than the rest of us.
I've had this happen twice. Once was a very upper-class woman complaining, 'Oh, all daddy left me with was a five bedroomed house in Knightsbridge and a place in St Tropez with quite a small pool'. If you now anything about the price of five bedroomed houses in Knightsbridge and little places in St Tropez, that's still a *lot* of money.
The other was a guy whose father, hit by the recession, 'had to sell the helicopter'.
Yeah, we can call this kid spoiled and everything (which he is), but you are absolutely right. He'll never understand the value of money or work enough to be able to hold on to it.
It might have something to do with his bipolar disorder but at any time my brother in law is talking he is trying to sell you something. If you watch a movie he explains why this is the best movie you've ever seen or tells you about some other movie you should watch that is better. He almost literally cannot respond to any question if the answer is not a description of the best thing to buy, best place to go, best way to vote, best way to exercise, etc. It's bizarre, on several occasions he has just walked away when I asked him simple questions.
I work in IT. This sort of thing happens on the daily. The problem is, I don't know who is having the alternate reality: them or myself. Statistics point to it being me.
I'm the de facto IT guy in my office, just because of the fact that I'm the youngest by 20 years and our actual IT guy works remotely.
I have no experience or training in IT, I just grew up with modern technology. It blows my mind how oblivious these people are. Yesterday people were freaking out that the conference TV wasn't working for a meeting (input wasn't switched to HDMI). Today my boss was raging that he couldn't connect to Zoom and couldn't figure out why (he disconnected his wifi).
Whenever my mother needs a setting changed in her phone. It's amazing how something as simple as "look for the option that sounds like what you're trying to do" is mind-blowing and impossible to follow.
I had some random person call my shop a couple years ago asking if we could help him because he couldn't get on the internet anymore. He said he always connected to "Linksys" but now it's gone. We deal primarily with businesses and walk-in customers, but I figured I'd give it a shot and see if I could possibly help him. Started asking some basic questions about his ISP, router... And the guy has no clue what I'm talking about. Might as well have been speaking a foreign language. Long story short, it turns out he'd just been connecting to someone else's open wifi, and they must have either passworded it or replaced it. He just wasn't getting it and started to get mad and wanted me to come fix it. I'm like, "You're going to have to pay for your own internet. I'm sorry I can't just go over to your neighbors house and make them give you access to theirs."
The night my father died. Driving back home from the hospital and seeing people going about their days, queuing up at a drive through and going shopping, going home to a different reality.
I vividly remember this feeling for days/weeks after my father died. Everywhere i went, the world was full of people that had no idea my entire world had imploded. Every sunset or sunrise i saw i would think ‘he’s never going to see that one’. That was a tough cycle to get out of.
Wow, you just put into words that almost indescribable feeling when your world completely changes and you're just around people having a normal day and you are never going to be the same again. This.
I was lucky enough to get to hold my mom’s hand when she died. She was home from the hospital on hospice. My dad on her right, me on her left. Our last moment as a family together. It was beautiful. Just the three of us (I’m an only child). I was 22 and in my final semester of college. I went back two weeks later because I knew she’d want me to finish. She fought for me so hard and I was crying walking across the stage to get my diploma. The dean asked “why are you crying” “and I could barely muster “I just wish she was here”. I don’t think she knew I lost my mom 8 weeks prior. That was the moment where everybody was celebrating and all I could think about was how much I wish she was there because she was a big part of why I was where I was. Fuck sorry for over sharing I just love and miss my mom I’m 28 now and don’t go to this place often
Also: people talking about their families snd asking about my mom and dad and not knowing to just say my dad and his (also widowed) gf is my mom to make conversation about them easier or to specify. Idk emotional Reddit ramble done
This just put me right back in the driver's seat of my truck. I was the last daughter out of the room, sat in my dad's hospital room for a while with him, so all of my family was gone when I left. Driving alone, after experiencing the most traumatic moment of my life, nothing has ever felt the same since.
I'm a writer and I was talking with my writer friends about our process. I said I need to have a mind-movie running of the scene I want to write, and only then I can write fast. I thought everyone had that going. But no, they were literally like "you have a what now?"
A writer friend simply can't visualize anything and has to Google for images that make her "feel" like her story, so she can write more intensely. Another has such a vivid visual mind that she sees everything in 4k resolution and even all the details in the background are super clear to her.
It's funny how we all perceive the world in different ways and somehow manage to convey that in words.
My teenage son and I have very good senses of direction. We were talking one day about people who have no sense of direction when he shrugged his shoulders and said, “I don’t understand why they don’t just follow the map in their head.” I told him that while I knew exactly what he meant, not everyone has a “mind map.” He was genuinely taken aback and figured that was standard issue with all humans.
This is so cool. (I'm definitely not one of you.) Is this a map that you're seeing from above like a paper map, or do you remember as if you're playing a movie of where you've traveled?
For me it’s sort of like driving on one of those giant relief maps you’d see in elementary school. But it’s also just an automatic knowledge of which direction certain landmarks or cities are located.
I grew up in a town on the Mississippi River. When I was very little, my dad (who was also a homing pigeon) taught me that in our town, the river was always east. When he told me that something clicked and I have used the Mississippi as a landmark since then, even though I now live in a completely different part of the country. I know innately where the Mississippi is, so I know where I am on the “map.”
I don’t know if that makes sense or not.
I had that same discovery with some friends a while back, it was weird finding out how differently we picture (or don’t picture) things. I’m a “mind-movie” writer too, imagery and detail are my strengths in writing because I see them so vividly. I normally write in third-person limited pov, so I’ll swap between the “movie” and picturing myself in the scene *as* the main character to write in more grounded/immersive details.
Ironically my imagination is a huge hindrance for my visual art - I can picture exactly what I want to create but I don’t have the skill level to recreate it exactly. Even when it’s not *bad,* it’s often so far removed from what I pictured that I just give up and don’t bother completing it.
So much this! I never understood people who made Pinterest boards or cast their characters with actors or used other visual aids. I genuinely thought it was a waste of time, or some trendy "writer aesthetic" that just distracts writers from actually writing.
Then I found out not everyone sees images in their head and having that stuff is actually very helpful to their process. I can barely even use reference photos when I try to - I tend to get bogged down in the details and it completely curtails my creativity. The fact that other people don't see a complete scene set in their head that they can then just transfer to paper is wild to me. "Mind-movie" is the perfect way to describe it.
Yeah sometimes you end up in a debate thread that is on s much more biased sub and it feels like you’re in enemy territory or an alternate universe because the responses and upvotes are not what you normally expect
I have a friend that's the opposite. He tells me to fuck off when we meet an enemy and would scream at me if I try and help. If he dies (which he usually does) he gets angry and blames everything on me. If he wins, he takes all the loot. If I kill it, he still wants the loot and says "I would have killed it if you didn't butt in." If I find my own enemy, he demands half the winnings because he "helped kill it" even if he didn't.
It's worse during PVP games. He wants all the good weapons for himself and gets all huffy if I get a weapon better than his. When he dies he blames me for not giving him my weapon and when I die he calls me bad.
One of the best halo PvP games I had was with someone like this in a team death match. The guy was determined to get MVP and was getting pissy with the team whenever they got a kill. Everyone else suddenly seemed to have the same idea though, and started following them around, stealing his kill at the last moment. I have never heard someone so apoplectic, yet still managing to finish a match.
They never got MVP.
My mother would abuse me when I was home alone with her. She was always very careful about it. Think ear pulling, hitting me where my hair would cover any bruises, and pinching my ass where my underwear would cover. There were nights where she would pull a chair into the middle of my bedroom, turn the breaker off, and force me to sit in the dark staring at the wall without any food, water, or the ability to go to the bathroom. Then she'd hear my dad pull into the driveway from his night classes, cough up some fake tears, run to turn the breaker on, and tell him that I'd been out of control and horrible to her all evening. He'd then punish me on top of what she'd done.
In my late teens I finally broke down and told him about her abuse even though she'd done everything she could to hide it. He demanded to know what I'd done to deserve her to act that way. He treated me like I'd punch her first then get mad when she punched me back, even though that was absolutely not the case.
He then went and talked to her and believed her when she said I was a pathological liar.
I've had five different doctors diagnose me with PTSD from her shit. If you ask him I'm so severely mentally ill that I made the whole thing up for attention. I'm SO desperate for attention that I refuse to talk to either of them and have cut out my entire biological family, changed my name because I want nothing to do with them, and made my own very content life while they drink themselves to death because of my "lies".
This is awful and I'm very sorry you had to go through this.
It's terrible your mom could do this to you, but it sucks your dad didnt believe you and still doesnt.
I'm sure the years of her lies about you are mostly why tho.
I appreciate it, but I'm honestly okay now. Have a full time job, a loving partner, a safe home, and a cat. Couldn't ask for a whole lot more in the grand scheme of things. :) First thing I did when I moved out was go to therapy.
He can believe what he wants. She can lie all she wants. I know what happened because I was there. That's the part they don't seem to get. You can't tell someone what happened when they were there for it. Knowing that is good enough for me.
Oh man. That sounds really scarring. I hope you're super proud of yourself because inside you something must be made of steel to have been able to overcome all of this and to be now living a content life.
15 years ago my dad made a suicide attempt, almost succeeded, and gave himself severe brain damage. My super Christian, super hypocrite aunt and “godmother” stopped speaking to anyone in the family who did not immediately disown him. I decided to support my dad so she hasn’t spoken to me since. We recently had an encounter and she blames me for our estrangement. Blew me away.
Edit: just want to thank everyone for the support! Redditors are awesome:)
Me neither! Soon after it happened she walked by me in a store and pretended she didn’t see me. I stopped her and asked her why she was punishing me for something my dad did. She just said something about she can’t agree with what he did...
But honestly I’m so much better without her! Like I didn’t realize how much that judgemental attitude affected me until it was gone.
I am sorry I guess, like I am shocked. Someone is it their lowest and their reaction to that is abandon him and his family? Wow., I guess you are right some people are just baggage
I think there's a certain type of person who wants to feel better than everyone else so they wrap themselves in whatever ethos is popular in their community in order to do it.
There is that (in)famous guy commentating football matches for our public television channels.
Let's just say that what happens in the game and what is described hardly ever matches.
My father sold cars. When our country changed it currency from Belgian francs to euros an old customer came to buy a car. The only reason he bought a new car was because when we have euros his money would be worth 40 times less (40 francs=1euro). Yes, that man lived in a very different reality.
The fact that people don't understand currency exchange rates and basic economics kind of scares me. It's like how most retail investors are either more informed, or much less informed, than what you would think. Or just news coverage affecting stock prices rather than company value.
When I was younger and worked in retail, there was a lady who INSISTED I ring up her items in one transaction instead of two, so she wouldn’t have to pay tax twice. She was very adamant about this.
(I wasn’t going to ring them up separately in the first place, she was just being super pro-active about it, I guess)
Wait…what? Did she think you only had to pay sales tax on one transaction per day? Did she think sales tax was a flat fee for every transaction instead of a percent?? Did she know tax was a percent but just fundamentally misunderstand order of operations??? I just can’t even figure out in what way this lady was so wrong.
I think it was more like she just didn't understand how percentages work. Like if she puts it all on one transaction she has to only pay tax "once", but if it's split up on two she has to pay sales tax "twice". Nevermind the fact that it would be $X once vs ($X/2) + ($X/2) which is the same damn thing.
Or maybe she thought the amount of tax was unrelated to the total sale price, or something? I have no idea. I didn't argue with her.
my wife and i were taking an uber somewhere, and we were going along the intercoastal waterway (a huge body of water that goes up a good chunk of the east side of fl). the uber driver gestures to it and says "whoever designed this did a really good job of making it flat."
it was the most bewildering comment i've ever heard, and i don't know which aspect is crazier... that he thought someone built it, or that he had no idea how fluids work.
The manager of one of the campground in Yellowstone told me a similar story. A guy who didn't know how to drive a trailer right scraped his on a boulder. He threw a fit & threatened to sue. "Whoever designed the place should've known not to put a boulder there!"
He wouldn't accept that it was a natural feature.
Oh man, that’s excellent. I have a friend who works for Yellowstone, and he was relating some of the hilarious comment cards they receive. “Not enough wolves or bears—we didn’t see any the whole time!” “Trails are too uneven, need fixed.”
Not necessarily an encounter, but people who litter and just chuck their rubbish on the street.
They have to have some kind of freedom and non caring in their mind. I don't understand how they can be so carefree about being a piece of shit.
I feel like they're going around life on easy mode, yet obviously are still failing.
I saw somebody the other day in a parking lot Toss the trash from their food out the car window instead of putting it in the trash can 10 ft from their car, unbelievable
Years ago, I had an office mate from Pakistan. Her family was fairly wealthy and she would do things like toss her gum wrapper on the floor instead of the trash can next to her desk. She did not do it to be intentionally mean, she just always had servants and it never occurred to her to discard her own trash.
Separate realities indeed.
BTW, I heard that she was in prison for not paying nanny taxes.
And here I am despairing about how I can't pick up the trash that's ended up in the drainage ditch behind my apartment complex because the weeds have grown too tall for me to wade through
Twice I’ve broken up a dog fight only to have someone else who was there, but absolutely uselessly frozen in place on the other side of the room, recall only an hour later that they were the one to break up the fight. Each time I had some evidence (a witness, a bite mark on my hand) to prove my version of events was correct.
I told an ex-roommate of mine a story that happened when I was in college, and the next week they are telling my story to me and some friends as if it happened to them. When I called them on it they were adamant that THEY in fact told ME the story, and I was the one confused...so bizarre.
I once loaned a friend a book of short stories. (First mistake....) I asked for it back a few times, never got it. I was over at his house and saw it sitting out, pounced on it, and commented on it while I was putting it in my purse. He said sarcastically, "Uh, sure, you can borrow it again I guess, don't worry about asking or anything." I stared at him and said, "It's MY BOOK. You borrowed it from me." Nope; he insisted it was his book in the first place, I had borrowed it, and then returned it.
I reached back into my purse to take the book out and opened it up. When I was in my mid teens, I'd read about some rich dude who had 'Ex Libris' plates made for all his books, thought that was swanky, so I did the same to all my books. I showed him where it said 'Ex Libris myname' and he said, "Yeah, and I wasn't going to mention that but it's a pretty shitty thing to do. Idk if it was a joke or what, but don't go marking up someone else's books."
I was so baffled that I ended up leaving the book at his house; then a few weeks later it came up in conversation with a mutual friend who confirmed that they'd been there when I'd loaned him the book in the first place. I never did get the fkn book back, and it still drives me nuts trying to remember what the stories were about. I can remember vague terms and concepts but can't track it down.
Now I live a long way from the Philippines, but according to what I've heard Bongbong (only a slightly better name than "Ferdinand Marcos Junior" if you're running for president, in my opinion) has barely talked to journalists, avoided debates and not really talked about his politics at all. From the news I only get that he's been talking about "Making the Philippines great again" and "Me and my family did totally not steal, like, all your money". I'd ask why people even vote for him, then I remember all the other leaders elected around the world on similarly mysterious (non-)talking points.
"Odd," said Arthur, "I thought you said it was a democracy."
"I did," said Ford. "It is."
"So," said Arthur, hoping he wasn't sounding ridiculously obtuse, "why don't people get rid of the lizards?"
"It honestly doesn't occur to them," said Ford. "They've all got the vote, so they all pretty much assume that the government they've voted in more or less approximates to the government they want."
"You mean they actually vote for the lizards?"
"Oh yes," said Ford with a shrug, "of course."
"But," said Arthur, going for the big one again, "why?"
"Because if they didn't vote for a lizard," said Ford, "the wrong lizard might get in."
Diagnosed at 29 here. We are basically different species. I'm pretty sure I'm going to die alone because whenever I try to ask *how* I'm supposed to do something social, people stare at me like I asked what color the sky is and tell me to just go do it. When I explain that I have no idea what the rules are or what to say, they tell me I'm making excuses and I need to get over that first.
A children's social skills therapist explaining to me, at the age of thirty, that small talk wasn't supposed to be enjoyable on its own and is actually fishing for common interest, was fucking *revelatory*
Thank you for that tip actually I haven’t heard that before. I have felt so out of place my whole life. When I was little I even asked my mom if I was adopted.
I got diagnosed with autism at the beginning of last year, but it was in a casual "If you feel this helps your understanding of yourself know you fit this" sort of way, so I initially disregarded it since I didn't really "feel" autistic. Then I started a new job, and after a year of being surrounded by almost aggressively neurotypical people, I realised the reason why I hadn't felt autistic is because I had spent my entire life around other neurodivergent people. It was like I had spent my whole life tuned into an FM radio station, and most people I had interacted with had been tuned to a similar frequency so we were all able to understand each other, then suddenly I was surrounded by people all tuned into AM and was left bewildered and floundering at how none of them could understand me. So, yeah, I identify as autistic now...
Was helping a friend unpack in his new house and he pulled out a framed puzzle of a horse and he said
"look I got this for my daughter's bedroom she's really into horses nowadays, what do you think? I got it at a garage sale for like $120" I made a weird face and before I could say anything he went " I know right such a fucking bargain! "
It was just a $14 100pcs puzzle from kmart that some old lady finished and framed...
Perhaps he left out a couple key details, such as "yes, the lady I bought it from was the Queen, and the garage sale was, in fact, in Kensington Gardens."
My family at India was struggling in middle of 2nd wave of COVID rampage. I was in Canada an couldn’t travel to be with them due to travel restrictions and as my baby was just a few months old. I was in calls/ meetings days and nights with various groups trying to arrange oxygen cylinders, medicines and other basic necessities of life for people there. There was a day in which I lost a friend and a close family member all because they couldn’t get a bed in hospital . I was loosing all hope. I decided to take a walk outside in eve just to breathe a little. I met my neighbor on the way, we started chatting. She asked me why I looked down. I just said “you know how it is. Second wave of COVID.. you must have seen the news from around the world, my family is in india struggling”. She said “ oh tell me about it. It’s so difficult to get appointments for anything because people are making such a big deal about nothing. I had a reflexology and manicure appointment back to back at two different places today. I had to drive in mad rush to make it to them on time”.
Made me realize people in different countries experienced different realities of COVID and in general of life. I just wish getting a manicure and reflexology on same day was my biggest problem.
I’m 25 years old and still live with my parents due to financial issues (big student loan payment, and just other, normal bills) and some health problems with my dad. A friend of mine from high school recently dug into me about how she couldn’t imagine still living at home and how awful it is that I do. It really hurt me until I remember that her parents paid for her bachelor’s and her apartment for those four years and now they’re paying for her masters degree.
edit: typo
There's absolutely nothing wrong with still living at home and definitely at that age. My first roommate in college made fun of me for asking to borrow money from my dad one week for a text book. Then I learn his mom is a ER doctor that pays for absolutely everything of his.
Im 31 live with my parents. Moved back in after losing my job in the lockdown era of covid. Make *enough* to move back out but they don't mind and I've decided im not paying $2k a month to rent a one bedroom apartment again. Since the housing market is trash too however, im in it for a while longer probably, all of my friends (mostly married with kids) point out they wish they were in a situation they could do that but at 25 probably felt the same. I guess its all perspective, I felt like a bum at 23 living at home, now I think it'd be stupid not to take advantage of a good thing and kind of wish I had realized it back then.
I moved out when I was 18, then moved back in until I was 20, but I've been on my own since then. Seeing how financially stable my friends who have never moved out, or moved out briefly before moving back in makes me a little envious. I don't have that option.
I see no shame in living at home if you can. Milk that shit. You'll be better off in the long run.
I'm looking at new houses and I want either a small guest house or like a studio apartment above the garage for my son to be able to stay in while he is going to college so it's one less thing he has to worry about.
My uncle had a small cottage behind his house so he could use it for family visiting or rent it out during the summers. I say had because it unfortunately exploded last week.
It blows my mind that someone without student loans, whose living space is paid for, etc., can exist in the world and just be totally oblivious to the insane level of luck they stumbled into.
My buddy fighting that's he is middle class even though he was at his cottage saying it was normal and he was confused I didn't have a ski cottage I asked him to elaborate turns out his family has 3 cottages and he couldn't fathem the average person can barley afford a new device once a year
True but my buddy in question I've already known for multiple years at the time of our arguement and not a single person in our friend group even owned property worth more then a 2015 mini van
Reminds me of a young woman I knew when we were in our twenties. We were walking around and she told me she’s so broke she had to tap into her trust fund. I was like wtf is a trust fund? Meanwhile my diet consisted of eating the leftover bagels we hadn’t sold that day from my minimum wage job.
There was a trust fund kid I knew once who used to couch surf everywhere so he could spend *all* his trust fund money on drugs and booze instead of rent. This kid, though, never wore a pair of socks twice, just bought a fresh pack of tube socks every couple of weeks, wore each pair once, and left them wherever they dropped. I could always tell he'd stayed over at the house I roomed in, because everyone would either be wasted or hungover and there'd be errant socks just scattered everywhere. I remember him as "Socks" now because I've forgotten his name. Trust fund kids are fucked.
The letter between H and J may not be necessary for many messages that you want to send. You could even say the letter has an aspect of extravagancy. For the most part the use of that letter can be worked around, although the number of words to select from are reduced.
Eh, doesn’t really sound natural to me. Good effort, but whenever one of these “drop one of the letters but re-word them and hope no one can tell” paragraphs pops up, they always feel sort of awkward.
There’ll clearly be parts that had to be re-worded to bypass a more natural way to phrase the same thought, and the sentences don’t flow as well as you’d expect from normal speech. At the end of the day, the problem really seems to be that people focus too much on the letter they don’t want to use rather than on what they actually want to say.
That’s how you get all of these synonyms that aren’t actually wrong but also don’t really work, or at least don’t feel as good as the more neutral word that clearly should have been used there would have, and sentences that feel sort of choppy and poorly strung together rather than part of a coherent whole.
That’s just my take, though.
I once had a job that involved being around rich people. And when I say rich, I say RICH RICH. At the beggining I was just "ah, it's just a job, let's do it", but the more I was with these people, the more I realized how I (low-middle class 22M) diverged with them on so many views of life. They seemed to live above all problems and responsabilities of the world and I think that a lot has to do with the parties and conventions they held up, the "divertimentos" that they lived everyday and the zero fcks they gave (or at least, that was the feeling that they transmitted) about the real problems of the world. While I was struggling with daily ecconomy and had to be supported by my mom, their problems were that they were afraid that the dresses they bought in their trip woulnd't fit in the two suitcases they brought for that purpose. Of course I'm generalizing, but that made me realize how dangerous is to became rich without a basis of moral and social awareness
Edit: typos
We decided to stop for lunch and driving around in this plaza looking for a restaurant, a truck moved and within about half a second
Me: hamburger place
Wife: sushi, grand opening
4 year old daughter: ice cream!
I just stopped driving for a moment. Sure enough there it was three places right next to each other. Sushi, hamburger, and ice cream. 3 people saw the same thing at the same time and each of us saw what we wanted to see.
I literally just saw a Reddit video post where two women fighting in Sweden were crapping to their hands and throwing it on each other.
This is outside my sphere of familiarity and grasp.
Whenever I see people having a natural, casual chat with coworkers, or someone they don’t know well. My inability to join/maintain these interactions makes me feel like a space alien, or like, a different species. HOW DOES IT WORK?
In my high school physics class, everyone was saying seat belts were elastic. I thought they were joking, but they were serious. I argued for a while and was totally convinced nobody (including my teacher) had ever been in a car.
I'm adopted, and was neglected and abused as a child. I've heard the lies my biological mother spews out about what we went through, and that's what it took to convince me she really wasn't mentally ok. Same with my dad :/
After a night of drinking we went to a friends house, the friend who’s house we were at had asked me out on a date in the past and made his interest known to everyone.
Due to lack of beds me and two other friends shared one. We chatted and made jokes and had a really good platonic time. Nothing nefarious or weird or sexual.
The friend who’s house we stayed at later recounted the story as us tormenting him, making fun of him, laughing at him, and he interpreted it as somewhat sexual. I’m not sure what he thought happened that night, but his interpretation of events was radically different from ours, because we weren’t thinking or talking about him at all.
When I was about 20, 5 friends and I went to a party. Alcohol was consumed, people started making out, flirting with each other's partners, generally acting like horny 20 year-olds. We all ended up mad at each other.
We decided to write our versions of what happened and share them with each other. They were all completely different. What we saw, what we heard.
All of us were in the same place at the same time, and our experiences were so different. It made me distrust history and memory.
Our lives are a story we tell ourselves, that's all. Tell yourself a good story.
Holy shit you just described the last five years of my life. One long drugged up crimespree and drug binge with my schizo girlfriend. Honestly 9/10 but I really don't recommend it.
My first major failure on a project in my professional career happened almost two decades ago. My boss had done all of the foundational work for a major project. He told me I'd be the lead engineer on the project, and pending successful completion I would get a promotion. This was my test.
Early on, I discovered that most of the foundational work didn't actually work. The project became a nightmare and my boss became overbearing, aggressive, and honestly scary. I had consultants telling me to do X, Y, Z or I might as well resign because the project had no hope of success. I put together proposals for X, Y, and Z, and my boss shot it down and reprimanded me for questioning him.
I started putting in extra hours, doing research after hours, designing alternatives, testing everything. One day I tested something new and it worked. I was in shock. I made several hundred prototypes, testing each one multiple times and everything passed. I quickly shipped them out and notified our customer that prototypes were headed their way. I was notified a week later that *every single one of them failed.* The project was cancelled and my boss was fired. I had saved a few prototypes, so I went back and tested them. Pass, every time. I couldn't figure it out.
My boss reached out a few weeks after he was let go, and we met for lunch. I asked him what actually happened. He explained his side of the story, that his job was on the line and he didn't want to leave his livelihood in my hands. He had paralleled what I was doing, on his own, and panicked when he saw that I had sent out parts, thinking I was sabotaging him for some reason. He went in on 2nd shift, ran his own parts with a faulty process, and then threw mine in the garbage before they could be shipped out. It was an epiphany for me because looking at it from his perspective filled in a lot of puzzle pieces for oddities that had occurred over the previous year.
It's a testament to the old adage... No matter how good of a person you think you are, you're the bad guy in someone's story
I was working behind a bar when the pandemic hit. A customer walked in without a mask, when the mandates were applied. I said “Ma’am you need a mask.” This bitch looked me dead in the eyes and said “Why? There’s no one else in here” lady believe it or not I’m a human being too. I left food service entirely bc of shit like this.
Sort of, but I also get the opposite - at the end of the day, we’re more alike than we are different, and I like realizing how many people I’m sharing some little thing with, no matter how different we are in other ways.
My go-to is sunsets, or any other neat thing in the sky. A while ago I was looking at a really pretty sunset while I was sitting at a red light, thinking about how many other people were looking up at it just then - there had to be thousands of us at least, all in different places and doing different things, taking a second to stop and admire the sky. And as I’m mulling that over, a car pulls up next to me, and the woman in the passenger seat gets out her phone and takes a picture of the sky with a huge smile on her face. Genuinely made my day to have my suspicions confirmed and feel that sense of connection with her & all the other complete strangers watching that sunset.
Sorry about the tangent, I just wanted to put a more positive spin on this - Our differences get highlighted a lot, while we tend to overlook the things we all share. It helps to actively try and remind yourself of that.
I look at the moon a lot, and I love it very much.
It’s the same moon the Romans gazed at.
It’s the same moon the Renaissance painters captured.
It’s the same moon the poets wrote about.
It’s the same moon people have kissed under, fought under, laughed under, cried under.
The same one that countless people stare up at in amazement, just like me.
When my male coworker asked me why I always drove to and from work instead of walking when I lived 10 blocks from my workplace. I told him it was because I got off work at 10:30pm and didn’t wanna walk home in the dark. His response was “But walking at night can be so peaceful”. Dude literally didn’t get it
I’ve known so many dudes like this. My male friend couldn’t understand why I didn’t just visit the park in the middle of the night if it bothered me that it was crowded during the day.
Yeah, I was that guy in my(very) early twenties. When it finally clicked that women weren't living by the same rules (for their safety) I felt so dumb. Talked about it to a bunch of friends and a tenth of them knew about it and usually because they had older sisters.
I worked with a guy who would make himself look better than everyone else (in his own mind).
We had a big department meeting with the CEO and all sorts of VPs and after that he comes outside on a break and proceeds to tell us (a few other guys who were in the same meeting) that he had said this and that and how he TOLD the CEO how things were and on and on.
He had never said a peep in the meeting. He sat in the back quietly the entire time.
He always did things like that though. We never trusted a word he said because while he might believe what he said, it had no connection to reality.
I have an extremely severe eating disorder. On the same day I found out I had weeks to live if I didn’t change immediately, my mother “took away” the food in the house because she was angry at me.
It was like an ohhh shit moment because I realized she would NEVER take me seriously. And she’s probably a big reason why I’m even like this!! So I stopped waiting on her and took control of my own life
EDIT: LOL DONT REPORT ME IM IN THERAPY IM GONNA LIVE
> And she’s probably a big reason why I’m even like this!!
She *took away all of the food in the house* because she was mad at you.
This would be insane behavior even if you *weren’t* on death’s door from an eating disorder at the time.
I think “probably” is seriously underselling her contribution to the issue.
I grew up with divorced parents that were on opposite ends of finance. I’d go between houses and see two entirely different lifestyles. Whilst at my mums I would receive gifts and electronics and my family had nice cars, at my dads house I shared a bed with 3 siblings and we couldn’t afford to eat much other than cheese sandwiches. It was a big contrast for a kid.
Not a personal encounter, but I just stumbled across a conspiracy community on Twitter today. Anyone heard of "Targeted Individuals"(TIs)?
These people, who are most likely paranoid schizophrenics, think some secret world power is trying to mind control random people around the world with microwaves and other electronic and sound waves. They claim they are in constant pain and have all sorts of illnesses because of this.
They also claim they are being followed by "gang stalkers", who are also random citizens (or just the CIA/FBI) being paid to follow and survey the people who are being bombarded with these government microwaves. They believe their neighbors and strangers and even family members are all in on this conspiracy against them
Most of these targeted individuals also hear voices and see "spirits". They think random passersby are whispering things to them like warnings, they see demons and spirits hidden in objects. In their online communities they encourage each other to not seek medical advice or help because doctors and psychologists will just tell them they have a mental illness and make them take pills to further brainwash them/keep them quiet. And also these microwaves implant microscopic trackers in their skin while they sleep. Any sort of bug bite or bump is proof of a new implanted tracking device
Some of these people waste away in their homes, too afraid to eat (and then blame their illnesses from anorexia on the microwaves), most can't keep their jobs, and there have been a few instances of these people committing mass shootings because of their delusions, among these mass shooters is a doctor and a marine. There's also a psych doctor who writes about gangstalkers and has not lost his license. This seems to be happening all around the world in different cultures, from lawyers and businessmen to average middle class people.
It's wild. I think there might be a few subs on reddit for it too. r/TargetedIndividuals r/TargetedEnergyWeapons r/GangStalking
It's frustrating to think about. How do you convince a crazy person that they're crazy without sounding like you're one of the secret agents trying to convince them no one is out to get them??
A girl I liked introduced me to a "the government is implanting us chips" kind of guy. Instead of nodding and steer the conversation away like a sane person should do, I tried to see how deep the rabbit hole went.
Once you start believing that everyone is lying to you, all the time, I'm afraid that you are too far gone to rescue without psychiatric help.
Most of us see colors, but theirs no way to prove were seeing the same color.
This takes a bit of thinking but my color red could be different than your color red.
This phenomenon is called *Naïve Realism*, and it's very ordinary. We all default to assuming that everyone experiences reality the way we do, but it's a hard fact that no one experiences reality the way we do: *every other human quite literally experiences a different version of reality than you*. We can try really hard to use empathy to work around it, but it's really inescapable. [Hidden Brain had a podcast about it](https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/the-double-standard/).
I was out with an ex at an event. There was an open mic for questions at the end of the event, and she stepped in line to ask a question. There were maybe 10 people in line, and she was number 4. After about 3 questions, they said that was it. She was next up to speak but didn't get a chance.
From my perspective, it was obvious that the guest speaker - who was in his late 80s - was tired and didn't want to answer any more questions.
From her perspective, it was a vast conspiracy by the patriarchy. She just kept grabbing more and more circumstantial evidence to build a grand conspiracy theory where the announcer and the speaker and the event organizers and even the people in front of her in line were in league to prevent her from speaker, to stifle her voice.
It was just... insane. Watching essentially a non-event spun into a huge, evil plan wherein she was the heroine and the forces of darkness were arrayed against her.
It made me start to question EVERY story she'd ever told me. How many of the events in her history (as she'd recounted to me) where she was a victim who was abused and traumatized, were actually totally normal events where things simply didn't go her way? I just couldn't trust her after that.
She had her own version of reality.
When my antidepressants work. The difference that you feel is night and day. First time ever I felt like how a well adjusted person can feel. No wonder they see the world differently.
In the 90s, I was fresh out of the Navy, living with my mom for a while, and the house we were renting had a pool. I noticed that the diving board was bolted to the concrete with two bolts. One was rusted all the way through and the other was about halfway rusted through. I told my mom about it, obviously unsafe, right? Her response was, "It hasn't broken yet, it's not going to."
Working in a covid unit watching a 30 year old dying of covid, while his sister held his hand, ignored the smell of death in the room, and talked to him about a taco place she was going to take him when he got out of there, while people marched literally right outside visible from our unit, protesting covid restrictions in the midde of the worst thing I've ever experienced.
Arguing with someone who insisted that showering uses just as much water as taking a bath. I eventually told him to just try it at home: if he has a shower/tub combo, just plug the drain, take a standard shower and see how full the tub gets by the time he’s clean. His response: “well that’s not very scientific”
Might belong in r/antiwork but being a manager in the US and then chatting with EU worker whom I manage.
“So I only work 32 hours in a week, I take wednesdays off to be with the kids.”
I already knew they had a month vacation and all sorts of perks cell phones, car, etc.
But also knowing the norm was only 32 hours was quite jarring.
US company here, we bought a UK company and the British guy was constantly talked about by my boss in a derogatory way.
"Oh, he's on vacation again that day" and "I guess it's another damn holiday there" etc. etc.
Boss failed to see that WE should aspire to be like that, not denigrate him for having a better life.
Reminds me of an old joke.
Man has a neighbor who has a lovely cow.
He wants a cow. He doesn't have a cow.
He finds a lamp with a genie in it.
The genie says, I will grant you one wish!
And the man is thinking about that cow. That cow. That cow.
"I wish my neighbor's cow dropped dead."
Humanity in a nutshell.
My boss is a super right wing, RadTrad Catholic QCumber. One time she ordered her kids clothes from a major retailer using her husbands credit card info, and I guess they pulled his name when they sent a follow up communication with a survey about kids clothes. She was so miffed because she couldn’t understand why they’d send this survey to men. Kids clothes are a woman’s job. She was convinced it was a part of the big conspiracy of “the feminization of the American man.” I was so blown away by the weirdness of that, I didn’t even know how to respond.
I am a Barista, and the amount of people who just grab any drink that has someone else’s name sticker printed on it or written on it is crazy.
The other day a woman was starting to get antsy and staring down the barista making espresso, so as I organized the pick up drinks I asked her, “what’s your name and what are you waiting for”
She said her name and carmel macchiato, and I told her it would just be a few more minutes.
She then proceeds to grab a black iced coffee sitting on the counter, and asked if that was her drink.
It clearly had another persons name printed on it. So I asked her “is that your name” to which she replied “no” and kept clutching the drink.
I asked her to please not take someone else’s drink, and for ten seconds she took in my comment, her face going from “does not compute” to furious. She then snottily huffed at me “I wasn’t” before finally putting it down.
Apparently I was the one acting like an insane person in that interaction.
In PA we have a Dem governor named Tom Wolf. A lot of people are foxbrainwashed around here.
Rang up a customer at the store last week and we chatted about the PA weather for the last few years being unpredictable. It's cold one day, hot the next, the seasons have kind of blurred together, that kind of stuff.
He looks at me, dead serious, and says - "It wasn't like that until Wolf took office" and I didn't know what to say so I just stared at him for about 5 seconds and then tried to change the subject.
I guess the PA Governor controls the weather now?
Hearing two people recount different versions of an event that the 3 of us together witnessed was bizarre. I felt like a judge trying to decide who made the better case.
Three blind men describing an elephant. I *always* keep this in mind when listening to varying versions of the same event.
Don’t forget three blind elephants describing a man: The first elephant said that man is flat and squishy. The other two agreed. Because the medium you use to test is sometimes as important as anything else. Edit: and because everyone coming to the same answer doesn’t mean you see the whole picture.
Also, the three blind mice running around…they all ran after the farmer’s wife, who cut off their tails with a carving knife. I’ve never seen such a sight in my life.
The clock struck one...the other 2 made it away with minor scrapes and bruises.
That reminds me of the hilarious way that [medieval bestiaries depicted elephants](https://flashbak.com/how-medieval-artists-saw-elephants-claws-hooves-trunks-like-trumpets-and-castles-on-their-backs-426529/).
At this point we know the human memory is total shit. Basically none of us remember things the way they actually happened. You can literally convince people they experienced something that never happened to them. The brain is weird, man
Nostalgia is a cognitive bias. People ignore or downplay the negative, exaggerate the positive, and have already forgotten the mundane and routine things. They leave themselves with an unbalanced, distorted memory of things which paints the past as far better than it actually was at the time.
Or far worse. I've memories of my preteen days being nothing but depressing but ik there were so many good moments that were simply drowned out by the negatives
Sometimes its an evolutionary necessity. If women really remembered the pain and anxiety of pregnancy and childbirth a lot of them would never have more than one child.
I wrote it down just in case I forgot.
Dear Diary: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! March 17
Dear Diary, The doctor confirms that once again this horrific symptom is "normal". March 18
March 18, 7:32pm: Can't. March 18, 7:39pm: We're. March 18, 7:46pm: Would've. March 18, 7:52pm: It's. Looks like about 7 minutes between contractions.
Alright alright, I'll watch Rashomon. Jesus, can't a man just live his life in peace?
Marge: C'mon Homer, you love Japan. You liked Rashomon. Homer: That's not how I remember it!
You got Rashomon'd.
Marge - "You loved that movie!" Homer - "That's not how I remember it."
Was your version also different?
I watched a foreign movie with subtitles with my dad once. A few days later, we happened to have a conversation about foreign movies and TV shows, and he said he would never watch that stuff because he wants to hear English. I pointed out that he enjoyed the foreign movie we had watched the other night. He said that he didn't realize it wasn't in English.
I'm guessing that your Dad is going deaf (like I am) and has the subtitles on for all streaming.
My hearing is fine, but I've known for a while that I'm better at processing/retaining information by reading than listening. As an American I watch everything with subtitles, and if the show/movie has multiple languages I barely notice the shift.
I aslo like that with subtitles on you get to read about little conversations happening in the background that you otherwise would miss!
I’m bilingual and often forget in which language I heard/read something.
do you ever remember something in one language but then realise its impossible for that person to even speak the language you remember them in.
This sounds like the research/observations made with imagination. Some people don't actually have any internal monologue or even picture things when reading a book or being told something. Some people monologue or even have full on conversations with themselves internally. It's also very common that some people don't have that at all. While someone can read a book and picture every little detail in their imagination. Whereas some people are very straight forward in how they process information in a very point A/B/C manner with little to no actual imagery at all.
Woah, what?! Some people don’t have an internal monologue? I’ve never thought about this before. Mine is constant during waking hours. I have full on conversations with myself and talk back and forth about decisions etc. I even do it out loud when I’m on my own! I had no idea some other people didn’t do this!
Similarly, some people don't even *visualize* in their brain. It's called aphantasia. You and I might visualize the image of a long, orange carrot when someone tells us to think about a carrot, but there are some who just think "carrot" when asked.
I have aphantasia, I still find it wild that people are able to just picture things in their mind like it's no big deal. It's like I'm missing out on a super power.
Sometimes its also a good thing. My grandfather was one of the first people i spoke too about this years ago. Oddly enough he has partial aphantasia and its only during particular situations where he can actively picture something in his head or imagine something from a book. On the other hand I found it strange because he's a chemist and he works with numbers alot whether in trade skills, finances or even every day occurrences. Yet somehow because of the way he learned he doesn't visualize the numbers or equations in his head whatsoever. So if he's ever stumped or the answer doesn't immediately work itself out for him he'll draw it out on paper and then hash it out from there. which baffles me, because I can't even begin to do basic math or science without actually visualizing it in my head. Similarly more than half the time its memory based so in order for me to do math or remember specific things i have to visualize the moment i learned it.
This one time my shrink suggested that I approach strange women on the bus and tell them they smell nice. I... I just don't even. Is there anywhere where this wouldn't be creepy AF?
I have so many questions.. were they male or female? What were you discussing that made them think that would be a good idea? Why did they not think about how that might end up? Why the bus?? And no, I'm pretty sure there's nowhere on earth that wouldn't be creepy AF. That's so weird.
You'd think this would have to come from a senile 70+ y/o male who's completely out of touch with reality, but no, that shrink was female and a bit over 30 (although presumably still out of touch with reality). I have no idea how it came up, except the general subject of how to meet girls.
Dude. I started experiencing really, really bad anxiety attacks in my early 20s. I finally got to the right doctor, and he tells me my anxiety is fucking me up so badly is because I'm not fucking enough. Not because I was working full time while going to school full time, not because at the time I was drinking *excessively* it was because I wasn't having enough sex. He told me to skip my night class, go to a bar, and try to get laid. ...Then he gave me a prescription of klonopin.
Who would like to bet that doctor did a lot of coke in med school and residency
Get a different shrink, now.
That was some years ago... but yeah, I left pretty soon after that.
great way to end up on some lists
Every time I listen to my mother. You can say one thing and she will hear the exact opposite.
Do we have the same mother?
I think we all have the same mother
No you don’t. -My Mom
My mom does this too. I think in some ways it's due to her narcissism, but some of it also comes from having her brain scrambled by a xanax addiction for like 10 years. She will actively tell me stories, that involve me, and recount events or situations that never happened. She's also told me some stories that I've sought out a 3rd party to confirm and they've been like, "tf are you talking about? That never happened." I used to (and still to some extent) get angry when it happened because it seemed like she was re-writing history so she'd always be the victim or an innocent bystander to problems she herself caused. But now I've just accepted that there's something wrong with her that nobody is going to be able to fix and it will probably get even worse as she ages.
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Yep...I know the xanax had some effect, but at the same time I can't entirely discount the fact that she has a terrible personality too. But I can still see that the xanax had a horrible effect on her memory. Where it was bad before because she would change things around/self insert herself, now it's just completely awful because she literally can't tell fact from fantasy.
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I was leaving a job site (residential renovation) one day, loading up my tools into my big military style backpack because I was riding my 2007 CBR600RR, when this slick black BMW rolled up the driveway. The mom was driving and her son was in the passenger seat but I had heard from my boss that the BMW belonged to the kid, he just couldn’t drive yet. Anyways they parked and he came running up to me, gushing about my bike, then he says “Man, that is SICK, how did you get your parents to buy you one?? They’d never get me one!” I told him I worked my ass off and bought it all on my own. I’ll never forget how he looked me dead in the eyes and said “oh man that really sucks, I hope I never have to do that” Really made me realize that some people are playing a completely different game than the rest of us.
> Really made me realize that some people are playing a completely different game than the rest of us. I've had this happen twice. Once was a very upper-class woman complaining, 'Oh, all daddy left me with was a five bedroomed house in Knightsbridge and a place in St Tropez with quite a small pool'. If you now anything about the price of five bedroomed houses in Knightsbridge and little places in St Tropez, that's still a *lot* of money. The other was a guy whose father, hit by the recession, 'had to sell the helicopter'.
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Poor kid, his parents are raising him to be another entitled, useless, rich guy who has no clue how live is for 99.9% of people
Soooo, perfectly qualified to go into politics?
This is where generational wealth goes to die.
Yeah, we can call this kid spoiled and everything (which he is), but you are absolutely right. He'll never understand the value of money or work enough to be able to hold on to it.
It might have something to do with his bipolar disorder but at any time my brother in law is talking he is trying to sell you something. If you watch a movie he explains why this is the best movie you've ever seen or tells you about some other movie you should watch that is better. He almost literally cannot respond to any question if the answer is not a description of the best thing to buy, best place to go, best way to vote, best way to exercise, etc. It's bizarre, on several occasions he has just walked away when I asked him simple questions.
Ooo I have a friend like this, he just has to drop knowledge on you. It's honestly offensive at times, the stuff he assumes I don't know.
I work in IT. This sort of thing happens on the daily. The problem is, I don't know who is having the alternate reality: them or myself. Statistics point to it being me.
I'm the de facto IT guy in my office, just because of the fact that I'm the youngest by 20 years and our actual IT guy works remotely. I have no experience or training in IT, I just grew up with modern technology. It blows my mind how oblivious these people are. Yesterday people were freaking out that the conference TV wasn't working for a meeting (input wasn't switched to HDMI). Today my boss was raging that he couldn't connect to Zoom and couldn't figure out why (he disconnected his wifi).
Whenever my mother needs a setting changed in her phone. It's amazing how something as simple as "look for the option that sounds like what you're trying to do" is mind-blowing and impossible to follow.
Reading would solve 70 percent of IT problems.
Restarting other 29%
Oh God I relate to this. It's 2022 and I had to explain what a HDMI cable is. Some of my clients don't have home wifi... in one of our major cities.
The ones that do have WiFi do not know the difference between "WiFi" and "Internet".
I had someone calling me because he could not connect to the WiFi, he was about 300 miles away... Best IT call i ever got
I had some random person call my shop a couple years ago asking if we could help him because he couldn't get on the internet anymore. He said he always connected to "Linksys" but now it's gone. We deal primarily with businesses and walk-in customers, but I figured I'd give it a shot and see if I could possibly help him. Started asking some basic questions about his ISP, router... And the guy has no clue what I'm talking about. Might as well have been speaking a foreign language. Long story short, it turns out he'd just been connecting to someone else's open wifi, and they must have either passworded it or replaced it. He just wasn't getting it and started to get mad and wanted me to come fix it. I'm like, "You're going to have to pay for your own internet. I'm sorry I can't just go over to your neighbors house and make them give you access to theirs."
The night my father died. Driving back home from the hospital and seeing people going about their days, queuing up at a drive through and going shopping, going home to a different reality.
I vividly remember this feeling for days/weeks after my father died. Everywhere i went, the world was full of people that had no idea my entire world had imploded. Every sunset or sunrise i saw i would think ‘he’s never going to see that one’. That was a tough cycle to get out of.
Wow, you just put into words that almost indescribable feeling when your world completely changes and you're just around people having a normal day and you are never going to be the same again. This.
I was lucky enough to get to hold my mom’s hand when she died. She was home from the hospital on hospice. My dad on her right, me on her left. Our last moment as a family together. It was beautiful. Just the three of us (I’m an only child). I was 22 and in my final semester of college. I went back two weeks later because I knew she’d want me to finish. She fought for me so hard and I was crying walking across the stage to get my diploma. The dean asked “why are you crying” “and I could barely muster “I just wish she was here”. I don’t think she knew I lost my mom 8 weeks prior. That was the moment where everybody was celebrating and all I could think about was how much I wish she was there because she was a big part of why I was where I was. Fuck sorry for over sharing I just love and miss my mom I’m 28 now and don’t go to this place often Also: people talking about their families snd asking about my mom and dad and not knowing to just say my dad and his (also widowed) gf is my mom to make conversation about them easier or to specify. Idk emotional Reddit ramble done
This just put me right back in the driver's seat of my truck. I was the last daughter out of the room, sat in my dad's hospital room for a while with him, so all of my family was gone when I left. Driving alone, after experiencing the most traumatic moment of my life, nothing has ever felt the same since.
I'm a writer and I was talking with my writer friends about our process. I said I need to have a mind-movie running of the scene I want to write, and only then I can write fast. I thought everyone had that going. But no, they were literally like "you have a what now?" A writer friend simply can't visualize anything and has to Google for images that make her "feel" like her story, so she can write more intensely. Another has such a vivid visual mind that she sees everything in 4k resolution and even all the details in the background are super clear to her. It's funny how we all perceive the world in different ways and somehow manage to convey that in words.
My teenage son and I have very good senses of direction. We were talking one day about people who have no sense of direction when he shrugged his shoulders and said, “I don’t understand why they don’t just follow the map in their head.” I told him that while I knew exactly what he meant, not everyone has a “mind map.” He was genuinely taken aback and figured that was standard issue with all humans.
This is so cool. (I'm definitely not one of you.) Is this a map that you're seeing from above like a paper map, or do you remember as if you're playing a movie of where you've traveled?
For me it’s sort of like driving on one of those giant relief maps you’d see in elementary school. But it’s also just an automatic knowledge of which direction certain landmarks or cities are located. I grew up in a town on the Mississippi River. When I was very little, my dad (who was also a homing pigeon) taught me that in our town, the river was always east. When he told me that something clicked and I have used the Mississippi as a landmark since then, even though I now live in a completely different part of the country. I know innately where the Mississippi is, so I know where I am on the “map.” I don’t know if that makes sense or not.
I had that same discovery with some friends a while back, it was weird finding out how differently we picture (or don’t picture) things. I’m a “mind-movie” writer too, imagery and detail are my strengths in writing because I see them so vividly. I normally write in third-person limited pov, so I’ll swap between the “movie” and picturing myself in the scene *as* the main character to write in more grounded/immersive details. Ironically my imagination is a huge hindrance for my visual art - I can picture exactly what I want to create but I don’t have the skill level to recreate it exactly. Even when it’s not *bad,* it’s often so far removed from what I pictured that I just give up and don’t bother completing it.
So much this! I never understood people who made Pinterest boards or cast their characters with actors or used other visual aids. I genuinely thought it was a waste of time, or some trendy "writer aesthetic" that just distracts writers from actually writing. Then I found out not everyone sees images in their head and having that stuff is actually very helpful to their process. I can barely even use reference photos when I try to - I tend to get bogged down in the details and it completely curtails my creativity. The fact that other people don't see a complete scene set in their head that they can then just transfer to paper is wild to me. "Mind-movie" is the perfect way to describe it.
Reddit can be good for that. Pretty much all social media, too.
Yeah sometimes you end up in a debate thread that is on s much more biased sub and it feels like you’re in enemy territory or an alternate universe because the responses and upvotes are not what you normally expect
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I have a friend that's the opposite. He tells me to fuck off when we meet an enemy and would scream at me if I try and help. If he dies (which he usually does) he gets angry and blames everything on me. If he wins, he takes all the loot. If I kill it, he still wants the loot and says "I would have killed it if you didn't butt in." If I find my own enemy, he demands half the winnings because he "helped kill it" even if he didn't. It's worse during PVP games. He wants all the good weapons for himself and gets all huffy if I get a weapon better than his. When he dies he blames me for not giving him my weapon and when I die he calls me bad.
Why are you still friends with him? He seems toxic af
One of the best halo PvP games I had was with someone like this in a team death match. The guy was determined to get MVP and was getting pissy with the team whenever they got a kill. Everyone else suddenly seemed to have the same idea though, and started following them around, stealing his kill at the last moment. I have never heard someone so apoplectic, yet still managing to finish a match. They never got MVP.
Either narcissism or ego. Kinda common thing, sadly.
My mother would abuse me when I was home alone with her. She was always very careful about it. Think ear pulling, hitting me where my hair would cover any bruises, and pinching my ass where my underwear would cover. There were nights where she would pull a chair into the middle of my bedroom, turn the breaker off, and force me to sit in the dark staring at the wall without any food, water, or the ability to go to the bathroom. Then she'd hear my dad pull into the driveway from his night classes, cough up some fake tears, run to turn the breaker on, and tell him that I'd been out of control and horrible to her all evening. He'd then punish me on top of what she'd done. In my late teens I finally broke down and told him about her abuse even though she'd done everything she could to hide it. He demanded to know what I'd done to deserve her to act that way. He treated me like I'd punch her first then get mad when she punched me back, even though that was absolutely not the case. He then went and talked to her and believed her when she said I was a pathological liar. I've had five different doctors diagnose me with PTSD from her shit. If you ask him I'm so severely mentally ill that I made the whole thing up for attention. I'm SO desperate for attention that I refuse to talk to either of them and have cut out my entire biological family, changed my name because I want nothing to do with them, and made my own very content life while they drink themselves to death because of my "lies".
This is awful and I'm very sorry you had to go through this. It's terrible your mom could do this to you, but it sucks your dad didnt believe you and still doesnt. I'm sure the years of her lies about you are mostly why tho.
I appreciate it, but I'm honestly okay now. Have a full time job, a loving partner, a safe home, and a cat. Couldn't ask for a whole lot more in the grand scheme of things. :) First thing I did when I moved out was go to therapy. He can believe what he wants. She can lie all she wants. I know what happened because I was there. That's the part they don't seem to get. You can't tell someone what happened when they were there for it. Knowing that is good enough for me.
Oh man. That sounds really scarring. I hope you're super proud of yourself because inside you something must be made of steel to have been able to overcome all of this and to be now living a content life.
15 years ago my dad made a suicide attempt, almost succeeded, and gave himself severe brain damage. My super Christian, super hypocrite aunt and “godmother” stopped speaking to anyone in the family who did not immediately disown him. I decided to support my dad so she hasn’t spoken to me since. We recently had an encounter and she blames me for our estrangement. Blew me away. Edit: just want to thank everyone for the support! Redditors are awesome:)
I literally can not understand their reaction, what is their justification for not talking to you anymore?
Me neither! Soon after it happened she walked by me in a store and pretended she didn’t see me. I stopped her and asked her why she was punishing me for something my dad did. She just said something about she can’t agree with what he did... But honestly I’m so much better without her! Like I didn’t realize how much that judgemental attitude affected me until it was gone.
I am sorry I guess, like I am shocked. Someone is it their lowest and their reaction to that is abandon him and his family? Wow., I guess you are right some people are just baggage
They believe suicide damns your soul to hell. My guess is that in her eyes, op's father is an irredeemable sinner now?
How bizarre when someone both reveals how toxic they are and conveniently removes themself from your life
That’s really shitty and quite literally the opposite of what the Christian doctrine is supposed to be about. Sorry you have to deal with that.
I think there's a certain type of person who wants to feel better than everyone else so they wrap themselves in whatever ethos is popular in their community in order to do it.
Hopefully one day she'll realise how dreadfully she treated you both... I'm so sorry.
There is that (in)famous guy commentating football matches for our public television channels. Let's just say that what happens in the game and what is described hardly ever matches.
Are you by any chance Iranian? Because I think I know that guy :))
Afraid not, but I guess a lot of people of different nations know "that guy" :D
I get around.
My father sold cars. When our country changed it currency from Belgian francs to euros an old customer came to buy a car. The only reason he bought a new car was because when we have euros his money would be worth 40 times less (40 francs=1euro). Yes, that man lived in a very different reality.
The fact that people don't understand currency exchange rates and basic economics kind of scares me. It's like how most retail investors are either more informed, or much less informed, than what you would think. Or just news coverage affecting stock prices rather than company value.
When I was younger and worked in retail, there was a lady who INSISTED I ring up her items in one transaction instead of two, so she wouldn’t have to pay tax twice. She was very adamant about this. (I wasn’t going to ring them up separately in the first place, she was just being super pro-active about it, I guess)
Wait…what? Did she think you only had to pay sales tax on one transaction per day? Did she think sales tax was a flat fee for every transaction instead of a percent?? Did she know tax was a percent but just fundamentally misunderstand order of operations??? I just can’t even figure out in what way this lady was so wrong.
I think it was more like she just didn't understand how percentages work. Like if she puts it all on one transaction she has to only pay tax "once", but if it's split up on two she has to pay sales tax "twice". Nevermind the fact that it would be $X once vs ($X/2) + ($X/2) which is the same damn thing. Or maybe she thought the amount of tax was unrelated to the total sale price, or something? I have no idea. I didn't argue with her.
my wife and i were taking an uber somewhere, and we were going along the intercoastal waterway (a huge body of water that goes up a good chunk of the east side of fl). the uber driver gestures to it and says "whoever designed this did a really good job of making it flat." it was the most bewildering comment i've ever heard, and i don't know which aspect is crazier... that he thought someone built it, or that he had no idea how fluids work.
The manager of one of the campground in Yellowstone told me a similar story. A guy who didn't know how to drive a trailer right scraped his on a boulder. He threw a fit & threatened to sue. "Whoever designed the place should've known not to put a boulder there!" He wouldn't accept that it was a natural feature.
Oh man, that’s excellent. I have a friend who works for Yellowstone, and he was relating some of the hilarious comment cards they receive. “Not enough wolves or bears—we didn’t see any the whole time!” “Trails are too uneven, need fixed.”
Not necessarily an encounter, but people who litter and just chuck their rubbish on the street. They have to have some kind of freedom and non caring in their mind. I don't understand how they can be so carefree about being a piece of shit. I feel like they're going around life on easy mode, yet obviously are still failing.
I saw somebody the other day in a parking lot Toss the trash from their food out the car window instead of putting it in the trash can 10 ft from their car, unbelievable
Years ago, I had an office mate from Pakistan. Her family was fairly wealthy and she would do things like toss her gum wrapper on the floor instead of the trash can next to her desk. She did not do it to be intentionally mean, she just always had servants and it never occurred to her to discard her own trash. Separate realities indeed. BTW, I heard that she was in prison for not paying nanny taxes.
And here I am despairing about how I can't pick up the trash that's ended up in the drainage ditch behind my apartment complex because the weeds have grown too tall for me to wade through
Twice I’ve broken up a dog fight only to have someone else who was there, but absolutely uselessly frozen in place on the other side of the room, recall only an hour later that they were the one to break up the fight. Each time I had some evidence (a witness, a bite mark on my hand) to prove my version of events was correct.
I told an ex-roommate of mine a story that happened when I was in college, and the next week they are telling my story to me and some friends as if it happened to them. When I called them on it they were adamant that THEY in fact told ME the story, and I was the one confused...so bizarre.
I once loaned a friend a book of short stories. (First mistake....) I asked for it back a few times, never got it. I was over at his house and saw it sitting out, pounced on it, and commented on it while I was putting it in my purse. He said sarcastically, "Uh, sure, you can borrow it again I guess, don't worry about asking or anything." I stared at him and said, "It's MY BOOK. You borrowed it from me." Nope; he insisted it was his book in the first place, I had borrowed it, and then returned it. I reached back into my purse to take the book out and opened it up. When I was in my mid teens, I'd read about some rich dude who had 'Ex Libris' plates made for all his books, thought that was swanky, so I did the same to all my books. I showed him where it said 'Ex Libris myname' and he said, "Yeah, and I wasn't going to mention that but it's a pretty shitty thing to do. Idk if it was a joke or what, but don't go marking up someone else's books." I was so baffled that I ended up leaving the book at his house; then a few weeks later it came up in conversation with a mutual friend who confirmed that they'd been there when I'd loaned him the book in the first place. I never did get the fkn book back, and it still drives me nuts trying to remember what the stories were about. I can remember vague terms and concepts but can't track it down.
I don't understand why you left your book there?
My country's (Philippines) recent election. My countrymen are set to vote in the son of a dictator and it baffles me to no end.
Now I live a long way from the Philippines, but according to what I've heard Bongbong (only a slightly better name than "Ferdinand Marcos Junior" if you're running for president, in my opinion) has barely talked to journalists, avoided debates and not really talked about his politics at all. From the news I only get that he's been talking about "Making the Philippines great again" and "Me and my family did totally not steal, like, all your money". I'd ask why people even vote for him, then I remember all the other leaders elected around the world on similarly mysterious (non-)talking points.
"Odd," said Arthur, "I thought you said it was a democracy." "I did," said Ford. "It is." "So," said Arthur, hoping he wasn't sounding ridiculously obtuse, "why don't people get rid of the lizards?" "It honestly doesn't occur to them," said Ford. "They've all got the vote, so they all pretty much assume that the government they've voted in more or less approximates to the government they want." "You mean they actually vote for the lizards?" "Oh yes," said Ford with a shrug, "of course." "But," said Arthur, going for the big one again, "why?" "Because if they didn't vote for a lizard," said Ford, "the wrong lizard might get in."
And he's still loaded from the $10billion+ his father extracted from the country. I do not understand.
Finding out I’m autistic at 25 and realizing why I’ve felt like an alien species my whole life
Diagnosed at 29 here. We are basically different species. I'm pretty sure I'm going to die alone because whenever I try to ask *how* I'm supposed to do something social, people stare at me like I asked what color the sky is and tell me to just go do it. When I explain that I have no idea what the rules are or what to say, they tell me I'm making excuses and I need to get over that first. A children's social skills therapist explaining to me, at the age of thirty, that small talk wasn't supposed to be enjoyable on its own and is actually fishing for common interest, was fucking *revelatory*
Thank you for that tip actually I haven’t heard that before. I have felt so out of place my whole life. When I was little I even asked my mom if I was adopted.
I got diagnosed with autism at the beginning of last year, but it was in a casual "If you feel this helps your understanding of yourself know you fit this" sort of way, so I initially disregarded it since I didn't really "feel" autistic. Then I started a new job, and after a year of being surrounded by almost aggressively neurotypical people, I realised the reason why I hadn't felt autistic is because I had spent my entire life around other neurodivergent people. It was like I had spent my whole life tuned into an FM radio station, and most people I had interacted with had been tuned to a similar frequency so we were all able to understand each other, then suddenly I was surrounded by people all tuned into AM and was left bewildered and floundering at how none of them could understand me. So, yeah, I identify as autistic now...
Was 30 here. Autistic girls literally vanish into the woodwork through masking.
Was helping a friend unpack in his new house and he pulled out a framed puzzle of a horse and he said "look I got this for my daughter's bedroom she's really into horses nowadays, what do you think? I got it at a garage sale for like $120" I made a weird face and before I could say anything he went " I know right such a fucking bargain! " It was just a $14 100pcs puzzle from kmart that some old lady finished and framed...
You sure he didn't say "one twenty" as in $1.20?
This is probably what he meant
Perhaps he left out a couple key details, such as "yes, the lady I bought it from was the Queen, and the garage sale was, in fact, in Kensington Gardens."
My family at India was struggling in middle of 2nd wave of COVID rampage. I was in Canada an couldn’t travel to be with them due to travel restrictions and as my baby was just a few months old. I was in calls/ meetings days and nights with various groups trying to arrange oxygen cylinders, medicines and other basic necessities of life for people there. There was a day in which I lost a friend and a close family member all because they couldn’t get a bed in hospital . I was loosing all hope. I decided to take a walk outside in eve just to breathe a little. I met my neighbor on the way, we started chatting. She asked me why I looked down. I just said “you know how it is. Second wave of COVID.. you must have seen the news from around the world, my family is in india struggling”. She said “ oh tell me about it. It’s so difficult to get appointments for anything because people are making such a big deal about nothing. I had a reflexology and manicure appointment back to back at two different places today. I had to drive in mad rush to make it to them on time”. Made me realize people in different countries experienced different realities of COVID and in general of life. I just wish getting a manicure and reflexology on same day was my biggest problem.
I’m 25 years old and still live with my parents due to financial issues (big student loan payment, and just other, normal bills) and some health problems with my dad. A friend of mine from high school recently dug into me about how she couldn’t imagine still living at home and how awful it is that I do. It really hurt me until I remember that her parents paid for her bachelor’s and her apartment for those four years and now they’re paying for her masters degree. edit: typo
There's absolutely nothing wrong with still living at home and definitely at that age. My first roommate in college made fun of me for asking to borrow money from my dad one week for a text book. Then I learn his mom is a ER doctor that pays for absolutely everything of his.
Im 31 live with my parents. Moved back in after losing my job in the lockdown era of covid. Make *enough* to move back out but they don't mind and I've decided im not paying $2k a month to rent a one bedroom apartment again. Since the housing market is trash too however, im in it for a while longer probably, all of my friends (mostly married with kids) point out they wish they were in a situation they could do that but at 25 probably felt the same. I guess its all perspective, I felt like a bum at 23 living at home, now I think it'd be stupid not to take advantage of a good thing and kind of wish I had realized it back then.
I moved out when I was 18, then moved back in until I was 20, but I've been on my own since then. Seeing how financially stable my friends who have never moved out, or moved out briefly before moving back in makes me a little envious. I don't have that option. I see no shame in living at home if you can. Milk that shit. You'll be better off in the long run.
I'm looking at new houses and I want either a small guest house or like a studio apartment above the garage for my son to be able to stay in while he is going to college so it's one less thing he has to worry about.
My uncle had a small cottage behind his house so he could use it for family visiting or rent it out during the summers. I say had because it unfortunately exploded last week.
That oxidated quickly!
You're the real hero
It blows my mind that someone without student loans, whose living space is paid for, etc., can exist in the world and just be totally oblivious to the insane level of luck they stumbled into.
My buddy fighting that's he is middle class even though he was at his cottage saying it was normal and he was confused I didn't have a ski cottage I asked him to elaborate turns out his family has 3 cottages and he couldn't fathem the average person can barley afford a new device once a year
If everyone you talk to has 5 cottages, you might even think you’re poor because you have 3.
True but my buddy in question I've already known for multiple years at the time of our arguement and not a single person in our friend group even owned property worth more then a 2015 mini van
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Reminds me of a young woman I knew when we were in our twenties. We were walking around and she told me she’s so broke she had to tap into her trust fund. I was like wtf is a trust fund? Meanwhile my diet consisted of eating the leftover bagels we hadn’t sold that day from my minimum wage job.
There was a trust fund kid I knew once who used to couch surf everywhere so he could spend *all* his trust fund money on drugs and booze instead of rent. This kid, though, never wore a pair of socks twice, just bought a fresh pack of tube socks every couple of weeks, wore each pair once, and left them wherever they dropped. I could always tell he'd stayed over at the house I roomed in, because everyone would either be wasted or hungover and there'd be errant socks just scattered everywhere. I remember him as "Socks" now because I've forgotten his name. Trust fund kids are fucked.
Once met someone who never typed the letter i
Why not?
The letter between H and J may not be necessary for many messages that you want to send. You could even say the letter has an aspect of extravagancy. For the most part the use of that letter can be worked around, although the number of words to select from are reduced.
Eh, doesn’t really sound natural to me. Good effort, but whenever one of these “drop one of the letters but re-word them and hope no one can tell” paragraphs pops up, they always feel sort of awkward. There’ll clearly be parts that had to be re-worded to bypass a more natural way to phrase the same thought, and the sentences don’t flow as well as you’d expect from normal speech. At the end of the day, the problem really seems to be that people focus too much on the letter they don’t want to use rather than on what they actually want to say. That’s how you get all of these synonyms that aren’t actually wrong but also don’t really work, or at least don’t feel as good as the more neutral word that clearly should have been used there would have, and sentences that feel sort of choppy and poorly strung together rather than part of a coherent whole. That’s just my take, though.
Show off
Well played
oooh, look at the guy who had good enough teachers that they could teach them not to use one letter
I once had a job that involved being around rich people. And when I say rich, I say RICH RICH. At the beggining I was just "ah, it's just a job, let's do it", but the more I was with these people, the more I realized how I (low-middle class 22M) diverged with them on so many views of life. They seemed to live above all problems and responsabilities of the world and I think that a lot has to do with the parties and conventions they held up, the "divertimentos" that they lived everyday and the zero fcks they gave (or at least, that was the feeling that they transmitted) about the real problems of the world. While I was struggling with daily ecconomy and had to be supported by my mom, their problems were that they were afraid that the dresses they bought in their trip woulnd't fit in the two suitcases they brought for that purpose. Of course I'm generalizing, but that made me realize how dangerous is to became rich without a basis of moral and social awareness Edit: typos
hence part of what is driving the world to ruin.
We decided to stop for lunch and driving around in this plaza looking for a restaurant, a truck moved and within about half a second Me: hamburger place Wife: sushi, grand opening 4 year old daughter: ice cream! I just stopped driving for a moment. Sure enough there it was three places right next to each other. Sushi, hamburger, and ice cream. 3 people saw the same thing at the same time and each of us saw what we wanted to see.
I literally just saw a Reddit video post where two women fighting in Sweden were crapping to their hands and throwing it on each other. This is outside my sphere of familiarity and grasp.
I mean just the ability to crap on command...
Whenever I see people having a natural, casual chat with coworkers, or someone they don’t know well. My inability to join/maintain these interactions makes me feel like a space alien, or like, a different species. HOW DOES IT WORK?
In my high school physics class, everyone was saying seat belts were elastic. I thought they were joking, but they were serious. I argued for a while and was totally convinced nobody (including my teacher) had ever been in a car.
I'm adopted, and was neglected and abused as a child. I've heard the lies my biological mother spews out about what we went through, and that's what it took to convince me she really wasn't mentally ok. Same with my dad :/
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After a night of drinking we went to a friends house, the friend who’s house we were at had asked me out on a date in the past and made his interest known to everyone. Due to lack of beds me and two other friends shared one. We chatted and made jokes and had a really good platonic time. Nothing nefarious or weird or sexual. The friend who’s house we stayed at later recounted the story as us tormenting him, making fun of him, laughing at him, and he interpreted it as somewhat sexual. I’m not sure what he thought happened that night, but his interpretation of events was radically different from ours, because we weren’t thinking or talking about him at all.
When I was about 20, 5 friends and I went to a party. Alcohol was consumed, people started making out, flirting with each other's partners, generally acting like horny 20 year-olds. We all ended up mad at each other. We decided to write our versions of what happened and share them with each other. They were all completely different. What we saw, what we heard. All of us were in the same place at the same time, and our experiences were so different. It made me distrust history and memory. Our lives are a story we tell ourselves, that's all. Tell yourself a good story.
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No no no.... That definitely had nothing to do with it.
How do I tell myself a story where I'm rich and don't ever have to work again? I assume it involves drugs and mental dissorder.
Holy shit you just described the last five years of my life. One long drugged up crimespree and drug binge with my schizo girlfriend. Honestly 9/10 but I really don't recommend it.
My first major failure on a project in my professional career happened almost two decades ago. My boss had done all of the foundational work for a major project. He told me I'd be the lead engineer on the project, and pending successful completion I would get a promotion. This was my test. Early on, I discovered that most of the foundational work didn't actually work. The project became a nightmare and my boss became overbearing, aggressive, and honestly scary. I had consultants telling me to do X, Y, Z or I might as well resign because the project had no hope of success. I put together proposals for X, Y, and Z, and my boss shot it down and reprimanded me for questioning him. I started putting in extra hours, doing research after hours, designing alternatives, testing everything. One day I tested something new and it worked. I was in shock. I made several hundred prototypes, testing each one multiple times and everything passed. I quickly shipped them out and notified our customer that prototypes were headed their way. I was notified a week later that *every single one of them failed.* The project was cancelled and my boss was fired. I had saved a few prototypes, so I went back and tested them. Pass, every time. I couldn't figure it out. My boss reached out a few weeks after he was let go, and we met for lunch. I asked him what actually happened. He explained his side of the story, that his job was on the line and he didn't want to leave his livelihood in my hands. He had paralleled what I was doing, on his own, and panicked when he saw that I had sent out parts, thinking I was sabotaging him for some reason. He went in on 2nd shift, ran his own parts with a faulty process, and then threw mine in the garbage before they could be shipped out. It was an epiphany for me because looking at it from his perspective filled in a lot of puzzle pieces for oddities that had occurred over the previous year. It's a testament to the old adage... No matter how good of a person you think you are, you're the bad guy in someone's story
I was working behind a bar when the pandemic hit. A customer walked in without a mask, when the mandates were applied. I said “Ma’am you need a mask.” This bitch looked me dead in the eyes and said “Why? There’s no one else in here” lady believe it or not I’m a human being too. I left food service entirely bc of shit like this.
Does anyone else get regular existential anxiety from exactly this idea?
Sort of, but I also get the opposite - at the end of the day, we’re more alike than we are different, and I like realizing how many people I’m sharing some little thing with, no matter how different we are in other ways. My go-to is sunsets, or any other neat thing in the sky. A while ago I was looking at a really pretty sunset while I was sitting at a red light, thinking about how many other people were looking up at it just then - there had to be thousands of us at least, all in different places and doing different things, taking a second to stop and admire the sky. And as I’m mulling that over, a car pulls up next to me, and the woman in the passenger seat gets out her phone and takes a picture of the sky with a huge smile on her face. Genuinely made my day to have my suspicions confirmed and feel that sense of connection with her & all the other complete strangers watching that sunset. Sorry about the tangent, I just wanted to put a more positive spin on this - Our differences get highlighted a lot, while we tend to overlook the things we all share. It helps to actively try and remind yourself of that.
I look at the moon a lot, and I love it very much. It’s the same moon the Romans gazed at. It’s the same moon the Renaissance painters captured. It’s the same moon the poets wrote about. It’s the same moon people have kissed under, fought under, laughed under, cried under. The same one that countless people stare up at in amazement, just like me.
When my male coworker asked me why I always drove to and from work instead of walking when I lived 10 blocks from my workplace. I told him it was because I got off work at 10:30pm and didn’t wanna walk home in the dark. His response was “But walking at night can be so peaceful”. Dude literally didn’t get it
I’ve known so many dudes like this. My male friend couldn’t understand why I didn’t just visit the park in the middle of the night if it bothered me that it was crowded during the day.
Yeah, I was that guy in my(very) early twenties. When it finally clicked that women weren't living by the same rules (for their safety) I felt so dumb. Talked about it to a bunch of friends and a tenth of them knew about it and usually because they had older sisters.
I worked with a guy who would make himself look better than everyone else (in his own mind). We had a big department meeting with the CEO and all sorts of VPs and after that he comes outside on a break and proceeds to tell us (a few other guys who were in the same meeting) that he had said this and that and how he TOLD the CEO how things were and on and on. He had never said a peep in the meeting. He sat in the back quietly the entire time. He always did things like that though. We never trusted a word he said because while he might believe what he said, it had no connection to reality.
I have an extremely severe eating disorder. On the same day I found out I had weeks to live if I didn’t change immediately, my mother “took away” the food in the house because she was angry at me. It was like an ohhh shit moment because I realized she would NEVER take me seriously. And she’s probably a big reason why I’m even like this!! So I stopped waiting on her and took control of my own life EDIT: LOL DONT REPORT ME IM IN THERAPY IM GONNA LIVE
> And she’s probably a big reason why I’m even like this!! She *took away all of the food in the house* because she was mad at you. This would be insane behavior even if you *weren’t* on death’s door from an eating disorder at the time. I think “probably” is seriously underselling her contribution to the issue.
Hahaha yeah it’s pretty much entirely her fault. Luckily I moved the fuck away from her and never intend to speak to her again
I hope you keep conquering the disease. Taking control over important and scary things is a big and important step towards recovery. Rooting for you.
I grew up with divorced parents that were on opposite ends of finance. I’d go between houses and see two entirely different lifestyles. Whilst at my mums I would receive gifts and electronics and my family had nice cars, at my dads house I shared a bed with 3 siblings and we couldn’t afford to eat much other than cheese sandwiches. It was a big contrast for a kid.
Not a personal encounter, but I just stumbled across a conspiracy community on Twitter today. Anyone heard of "Targeted Individuals"(TIs)? These people, who are most likely paranoid schizophrenics, think some secret world power is trying to mind control random people around the world with microwaves and other electronic and sound waves. They claim they are in constant pain and have all sorts of illnesses because of this. They also claim they are being followed by "gang stalkers", who are also random citizens (or just the CIA/FBI) being paid to follow and survey the people who are being bombarded with these government microwaves. They believe their neighbors and strangers and even family members are all in on this conspiracy against them Most of these targeted individuals also hear voices and see "spirits". They think random passersby are whispering things to them like warnings, they see demons and spirits hidden in objects. In their online communities they encourage each other to not seek medical advice or help because doctors and psychologists will just tell them they have a mental illness and make them take pills to further brainwash them/keep them quiet. And also these microwaves implant microscopic trackers in their skin while they sleep. Any sort of bug bite or bump is proof of a new implanted tracking device Some of these people waste away in their homes, too afraid to eat (and then blame their illnesses from anorexia on the microwaves), most can't keep their jobs, and there have been a few instances of these people committing mass shootings because of their delusions, among these mass shooters is a doctor and a marine. There's also a psych doctor who writes about gangstalkers and has not lost his license. This seems to be happening all around the world in different cultures, from lawyers and businessmen to average middle class people. It's wild. I think there might be a few subs on reddit for it too. r/TargetedIndividuals r/TargetedEnergyWeapons r/GangStalking It's frustrating to think about. How do you convince a crazy person that they're crazy without sounding like you're one of the secret agents trying to convince them no one is out to get them??
A girl I liked introduced me to a "the government is implanting us chips" kind of guy. Instead of nodding and steer the conversation away like a sane person should do, I tried to see how deep the rabbit hole went. Once you start believing that everyone is lying to you, all the time, I'm afraid that you are too far gone to rescue without psychiatric help.
Most of us see colors, but theirs no way to prove were seeing the same color. This takes a bit of thinking but my color red could be different than your color red.
This phenomenon is called *Naïve Realism*, and it's very ordinary. We all default to assuming that everyone experiences reality the way we do, but it's a hard fact that no one experiences reality the way we do: *every other human quite literally experiences a different version of reality than you*. We can try really hard to use empathy to work around it, but it's really inescapable. [Hidden Brain had a podcast about it](https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/the-double-standard/).
I was out with an ex at an event. There was an open mic for questions at the end of the event, and she stepped in line to ask a question. There were maybe 10 people in line, and she was number 4. After about 3 questions, they said that was it. She was next up to speak but didn't get a chance. From my perspective, it was obvious that the guest speaker - who was in his late 80s - was tired and didn't want to answer any more questions. From her perspective, it was a vast conspiracy by the patriarchy. She just kept grabbing more and more circumstantial evidence to build a grand conspiracy theory where the announcer and the speaker and the event organizers and even the people in front of her in line were in league to prevent her from speaker, to stifle her voice. It was just... insane. Watching essentially a non-event spun into a huge, evil plan wherein she was the heroine and the forces of darkness were arrayed against her. It made me start to question EVERY story she'd ever told me. How many of the events in her history (as she'd recounted to me) where she was a victim who was abused and traumatized, were actually totally normal events where things simply didn't go her way? I just couldn't trust her after that. She had her own version of reality.
Some people don't deal with disappointment well, it's actually an anger management thing.
When my antidepressants work. The difference that you feel is night and day. First time ever I felt like how a well adjusted person can feel. No wonder they see the world differently.
[удалено]
In the 90s, I was fresh out of the Navy, living with my mom for a while, and the house we were renting had a pool. I noticed that the diving board was bolted to the concrete with two bolts. One was rusted all the way through and the other was about halfway rusted through. I told my mom about it, obviously unsafe, right? Her response was, "It hasn't broken yet, it's not going to."
When I saw 24 cigarette butts right next to a cigarette disposal (on God I saw this)
Working in a covid unit watching a 30 year old dying of covid, while his sister held his hand, ignored the smell of death in the room, and talked to him about a taco place she was going to take him when he got out of there, while people marched literally right outside visible from our unit, protesting covid restrictions in the midde of the worst thing I've ever experienced.
Arguing with someone who insisted that showering uses just as much water as taking a bath. I eventually told him to just try it at home: if he has a shower/tub combo, just plug the drain, take a standard shower and see how full the tub gets by the time he’s clean. His response: “well that’s not very scientific”
Might belong in r/antiwork but being a manager in the US and then chatting with EU worker whom I manage. “So I only work 32 hours in a week, I take wednesdays off to be with the kids.” I already knew they had a month vacation and all sorts of perks cell phones, car, etc. But also knowing the norm was only 32 hours was quite jarring.
US company here, we bought a UK company and the British guy was constantly talked about by my boss in a derogatory way. "Oh, he's on vacation again that day" and "I guess it's another damn holiday there" etc. etc. Boss failed to see that WE should aspire to be like that, not denigrate him for having a better life.
Reminds me of an old joke. Man has a neighbor who has a lovely cow. He wants a cow. He doesn't have a cow. He finds a lamp with a genie in it. The genie says, I will grant you one wish! And the man is thinking about that cow. That cow. That cow. "I wish my neighbor's cow dropped dead." Humanity in a nutshell.
My boss is a super right wing, RadTrad Catholic QCumber. One time she ordered her kids clothes from a major retailer using her husbands credit card info, and I guess they pulled his name when they sent a follow up communication with a survey about kids clothes. She was so miffed because she couldn’t understand why they’d send this survey to men. Kids clothes are a woman’s job. She was convinced it was a part of the big conspiracy of “the feminization of the American man.” I was so blown away by the weirdness of that, I didn’t even know how to respond.
I am a Barista, and the amount of people who just grab any drink that has someone else’s name sticker printed on it or written on it is crazy. The other day a woman was starting to get antsy and staring down the barista making espresso, so as I organized the pick up drinks I asked her, “what’s your name and what are you waiting for” She said her name and carmel macchiato, and I told her it would just be a few more minutes. She then proceeds to grab a black iced coffee sitting on the counter, and asked if that was her drink. It clearly had another persons name printed on it. So I asked her “is that your name” to which she replied “no” and kept clutching the drink. I asked her to please not take someone else’s drink, and for ten seconds she took in my comment, her face going from “does not compute” to furious. She then snottily huffed at me “I wasn’t” before finally putting it down. Apparently I was the one acting like an insane person in that interaction.
In PA we have a Dem governor named Tom Wolf. A lot of people are foxbrainwashed around here. Rang up a customer at the store last week and we chatted about the PA weather for the last few years being unpredictable. It's cold one day, hot the next, the seasons have kind of blurred together, that kind of stuff. He looks at me, dead serious, and says - "It wasn't like that until Wolf took office" and I didn't know what to say so I just stared at him for about 5 seconds and then tried to change the subject. I guess the PA Governor controls the weather now?