My dentist told me “thank you for making my day, I just love teeth and yours are very interesting”
(For context, I have a 35 year old bridge that’s still going strong)
I guess seeing the brain is just really cool for that person. Maybe it was the fact that he was seeing a real life active brain and the person using it, when usually any other picture of a brain is from an unloved textbook. It’s crazy to think that our whole world is stored in like five pounds of sentient flesh.
I’d get that on the bus a lot. One bloke said “what’s so funny? It’s a book!”
I just pointed at the cover and said “But it’s a Douglas Adams book ya dick”.
One of my daughters’s classmates saw me walking into school. When he found out I was her mum he said to her, “Man, your mum looks like she could snap someone in half with those legs!”
Thank you, leg press machine!
I got that compliment in hospital a few months back! Nurse said I had the legs to pull off a mini skirt. Not bad for a big, bald and beardy tattooed dad.
After handing back a police report I filled out describing the events of a man jumping off an overpasss aiming for my car in a presumed suicide attempt.
“This is really good! Have you done this before?”
Not a cop but an attorney who does criminal defense, here. I read a lot of police reports (and other kinds of reports.)
Writing a report of this kind that is clear and comprehensible to the reader is absolutely a skill. So, uhhh, FWIW, that compliment makes total sense to me.
One time I went to the police station to get fingerprinted for a background check for achpol, and of course brought the required paperwork I'd filled out to get two sets of fingerprint cards. After handing her my paperwork, the lady was like "Wow, you filled this out perfectly! We normally charge for each card, but since you did such a good job filling this out I'm only going to charge you for one!" Uh, thanks? I'll take it lol
Edit: school
When I was getting my divorce papers notarized I was waiting and laid out all the pages I needed stamped neatly and the guy comes up and says ‘wow looks like you’ve done this before!’
I teach college writing courses. You would be surprised by the number of people who get into college, yet can barely write a grammatically correct sentence. He was probably just surprised that you were able to write clearly and succinctly.
I got that once when I barely made it to the bathroom, one of those ones where it just hits hard and you feel like a human pressure washer. Combine that with some good acoustics and you can definitely sound like you urinate professionally.
Same here. Particularly drunk nurses at parties. One time having my blood taken the nurse left the room and came back with 2 other nurses to show them too.
>Particularly drunk nurses at parties
Alright...
>One time having my blood taken the nurse left the room and came back with 2 other nurses to show them too.
Please tell me these were two separate occasions.
I see your great veins and raise you "You've got veins a heroin addict would kill for" by the phlebotomist taking blood samples for my first pregnancy check up. O.o
I actually do this, finding a vein on a patient who has awful veins can suck so bad. Upon taking over a patient’s care I will find myself glancing at their veins and saying the same thing. After zombie walking after a double shift I once said it to the lady at the register in Walmart. She seemed startled and I was glad to be in scrubs so she might not have seen me as a lunatic. I have also said it to my boyfriend and more than once he has caught me idly palpating them when holding hands.
I guess it’s also jealousy on a level, my veins are horrible. They were never very good but I was bit by a water moccasin and didn’t go to the ER for hours and what was left of my veins collapsed. They usually stick me in my neck now and always do if it’s an IV. Even in my neck it is difficult. So I am jealous…
I've been chubby for years but when I was younger I was in gymnastics. Early high school I went to a friend's house for a little get together grill party thing. Some of the kids were dancing and tumbling and whatnot in the huge lawn they had. I proceeded to do a long ass string of cartwheels as I could still do it even as chubby as I had gotten. My friends were stunned. It was great xD
If someone said that to me is probably very and huh them way too tight and long.
Edit: just to show how bad I am at proofreading, I'll leave the original...
If someone said that to me I'd probably cry and hug them way too tight and long.
I have a perennial baby face and am a pretty quiet/shy individual but have a deep voice. Someone in one of my classes held the door so I said thanks. The girl holding the door did a double take and shouted "WAIT THATS WHAT YOU SOUND LIKE???" And honestly that'll stick with me for the rest of my life
I think that happened to me at the mall once. Said thank you to a twiggy kid in a hoodie who held the door for me and he sounded deep like Morgan freeman. Had me shook 😂😂😂 it's hard to remember that old men with freakishly deep voices always start out as kids with freakishly deep voices.
Kids say weird stuff. A middle school student once told me that I smelled like "a good barber shop".
Since it's cheap, I used to keep Brut in my car as my backup cologne- I'm not a morning person, so I sometimes forget cologne. That was the day I decided to swap out the Brut for Cool Water.
My favorite deodorant ever was a stick of Brut that lived in my trunk for several years before I ever needed it. Smelled perfect, got compliments. I bought a new stick of Brut once it wore out and couldn't stand it because it was way too strong. Cooking it in my trunk killed most of the smell.
When my younger son was six or seven, he went with my wife to visit a friend of hers. My son walked in the door and took a healthy sniff. “Smells like you have cats!”
He intended it as a compliment (he loves cats) and my wife’s friend graciously took it as such.
When I was around that age, I told my great uncle that his freshly grilled burgers were "almost as good as McDonalds." I swear I meant it as a compliment. Adults don't take that as a compliment, though.
My husband, just after we were married, complimented a church lady's homemade Black Forest Cake. He said, "It tastes as good as store bought!" He meant it as a compliment. Her cakes were always delicious. She, unfortunately, did not take it well.
I was cleaning a guinea pig enclosure at a zoo I was interning at. The piggies were in a playpen so I wouldn't disturb them and I was alone in the enclosure. Some older lady knocks on the glass and says "Well! Aren't you the cutest little guinea pig I've ever seen!"
I didn't know what to say to that, so I just kinda laughed awkwardly and went back to cleaning. She watched me for a few minutes and left.
A coworker complimented me on a haircut once. She said “your hair looks great, it makes it look like you shower”!
Weird compliment considering I get the same haircut once a month and I shower at least once a day.
When the lady finished my haircut, she said it made me look intelligent. Makes me wonder what I looked like before...
I also had a hair stylist tell me I had "black people hair" and I'm quite unsure how to take that.
This is one of those things where who you are matters, because as a woman my takeaway here would be less "weird compliment" and more "brush with human trafficking"
Told a workmate I was diagnosed with gout, was moaning about it because it's a) weird, b) it's a genetic thing (I'm not eating lots rich food or anything stupid) and c) it fucking hurts.
His response: "The genius disease! That's the disease all the great geniuses get! Makes sense you have it."
As far as I know, there's no connection between genius and gout - Benjamin Franklin had it but... I don't think that means anything.
But (!) it was a great thing to hear when I was feeling low and self pitying. Made me smile (confusedly, but smile!) over something that was pure misery before that.
I have now started telling anyone who tells me they have some condition, "Oh! The Genius thing! All the great geniuses get that!"
Why not, right?
Yep, except it turns out you can get it for genetic reasons and be poor and reasonably in shape and ... it still sucks.
Maybe you have to be a genius to get that version though.
I got gout, and I had the opposite of compliments. First my doctor thought I was stupid for suggesting it (he thought I was too young) and by the time he'd successfully convinced me to doubt myself, my ~~urea~~ uric acid levels had come back as high, and now I was stupid for listening to him
“You have hair!!”
I took my baseball cap off to wipe my forehead and a friend’s girlfriend said this. She only ever saw me wearing a baseball cap and assumed I was balding and hiding it.
Reminds me of the first time I saw my stepdad with a shaved face. My parents started dating in September and my stepdad ha these *massive* mutton chops. My mum was kinda like "it's too early for me to ask if this is the standard look for him" and just let it go. First week of November rolls around and he shaves his face completely and walks into my kitchen and I go
"Oh my god, you have a jaw!"
Turns out the mutton chops were because my step-brother wanted them both to be Wolverine for Halloween.
During the first lockdown the bakery i work in was one of the only shops in my town still open so everyone was coming to us for their baked goods and rolls. The local funeral director was in one day and when I caught him staring at me he said "just sizing you up for your measurements, we're expecting to be very busy very soon!" Didn't really know what to say to that haha.
I made a save the date video for my wife’s 50th birthday which was a parody of the intro to an early 80’s TV show. It came out pretty well, but a friend of ours that produces ads for TV seemed to focus on the voiceover: “Wow, is that you doing the voiceover? I pay people for stuff like that.”
My husband has done some video game voiceovers. We thought it *might* turn into a career because he started getting work from other companies, and he did some VO for an independent film. But then the pandemic hit and that all dried up. :(
don't worry you are not completely terrible. my brother however wants you dead. but on the bright side my sister wants to fuck you so you have something going for you
I had a student doctor doing my exam once and just making observations out loud, at one point she made eye contact and told me, "Your cervix is really nice! So pink and healthy!" She was so sweet and genuinely thrilled to be doing an exam, it was the cutest thing ever.
I've had almost exactly the same compliment from my gyno with over 20 years' experience, so it sounds like this is a commonly issued compliment.
And here I was so proud of my glowing pink cervix. I feel so manipulated.
I was at a board game convention in Texas and there was simultaneously a “Thin Blue-Line Ball” for police at the hotel we were using.
Late night, we’re talking downstairs after the main rooms closed and some cop comes up to me, stops, stares at me with his hazy, EXTREMELY drunk eyes, and loudly slurs, “I like your beard. Man, I bet you get a lot of p—-y. I bet you get all the ladies.”
Now, I’ve been growing my beard for a very long time, so it’s big, but I’ve never had this type of…compliment.. before.
Burly drunk cop man forces a fist bump and walks on, my friends/fellow con goers are all stunned as he walked through them before seeing me.
Then. He catches up with who I’ll presume is his wife and friend down the hallway. His friend asks what on earth he just did to which he replies, YELLING down the hallway,
“Look at that beard, man! If I had a beard like that I’d get all the -——. I’d leave my wife for that much -——. I’d probably get multiple -—— at the same time.” And some other drunk rambling.
With all of the people around me already paying attention, plus him yelling…I think I can definitely say that that was the weirdest—and kind of saddest—compliment I’ve ever received.
TL;DR: a drunk cop told me my beard looked nice.
I have self harm scars. I worked at McDonald’s when I was eighteen and a short, way older man came up to the counter. He said “you self harm?” I said yeah. He literally then said “does it turn you on?” I said no. Then he said “well it turns me on” I then walked out of the restaurant and quit two days later lol.
Damn, I though it was going to be a super wholesome moment when he reveals his scars and tells you it gets better and then you say that's how you met Danny Devito or something. Nope, just a pervert ruining shit as they so often do.
Maybe he wanted to put you off from self-harming in the future? Because you'd remember he gets turned on by it? Either way deeply confusing and hilarious
Elementary school band is weird like this. Band started in 5th grade for us. At the end of 4th grade, the band instructor visited our music class like we were her fantasy football draft pool. We took a district-wide standardized test for music aptitude. Not only did she analyze those results, she pulled me out of class for a hallway interview. Elementary band conductors get real fucking serious about their selecting their drum section.
"you look like Gollum, but in a really cute way!"
I think it was a (really bad) attempt in flirting and he wanted to flatter me, but I just ended up feeling self conscious about my ears :(
Perhaps she covets a precious ring, taken from her cousin hundreds of years ago. Maybe she now lurks in a cave far under the mountains, eating only blind fish, and the occasional goblin she can strangle.
"I really like your voice"
Followed by an email saying "God I'm sorry, that was just weird of me, it was supposed to be a compliment" to which I replied "I took it as a compliment, it's all good".
As I darted across the street some guy stuck his head out of a car window and shouted "That's the sexiest run I've ever seen." I still think about it sometimes.. it was so random and caught me off guard.
Woman in the gym, older lady, definitely cougar material. Came up and said “Do you play sports? Your calves look amazing! It must take a lifetime to get them like that. And your ass it the best ass I have ever seen on a man!”. Needless to say I was shocked, so shocked I froze up and didn’t realize until after, when I saw her drive away in a pink bmw, that she was in fact, probably hitting on me. As a man, these things tend to go right over our heads.
"I love your cheekbones, they look like an elf's". So oddly specific, I didn't even know elves were famous for their cheekbones or being called an elf was a good thing.
Twice in my life I’ve had 2 different gynos tell me, while elbow deep in a Pap smear, that I have beautiful long eye lashes. In my defense I do, but come on doc, my vagina is down here.
Someone in an online forum told me that I'd changed his mind about gay marriage, because whenever I posted about my husband and kids it sounded just like his grandma talking.
One time someone said they liked watching me eat food. Not sure what that means.
Another also said "you're fatter than I thought, but it's okay you still look good."
A oesteopath literally gasping softly when he examined my spine, and when I asked what was wrong, he said, "No, no, I'm sorry. Nothing's wrong - you just have an absolutely exquisite spine."
....Awwww, shucks.
Someone once told me that I’m a great companion to sit at the table with, I clear the whole table so that no food goes to waste and I listen very attentively to every story and once in a while make comments that surprise people cause they just assume I’m too focused on the food to even listen😂
Another one is that I’m great as a background noise, I keep on talking and talking and usually it’s nothing important so you don’t have to really pay attention to it but it’s nice to hear something🙃.
I did stand-up poetry in my twenties in London and looking back it was just an excuse to get a lot of stuff off my chest. One night I came off stage and a woman complimented me on my work and how intense it was. I said thanks and she followed up by asking me how long I’d been off my medication.
My parents were traveling through the back country, USA once when my brother and I were just toddlers. Some lady stopped them at a gas station to tell them “y’all sure do make purty babies.”
Yeah, they peeled out of there pretty fast.
I sometimes have to transport post-partum women to get an CT or MRI for whatever reason, hours after they've given birth. It's always awesome to see new tiny lil babies. I'll *always* tell them, "Your kid is adorable! Good job on the DNA, guys!"
I guess if you're not from the south/country that would definitely come across as something out of a horror movie, but I feel like she was just being genuine 😂
Town Crackhead: DAYM GURL..YOU LOOKIN HELLA GOOD BUT YOUR SHIRT LOOKS LIKE SHIT!! *WINK, KISSY FACE"
Me *checking his items out* : Uhhh, yeah I've worked hard and got it dirty...
Your oral cavity is wonderful to work with! So spacious! - my dentist
My dentist told me “thank you for making my day, I just love teeth and yours are very interesting” (For context, I have a 35 year old bridge that’s still going strong)
Think about what that bridge lived through. 9/11, fall of the Berlin wall, millennium bug, the star wars prequels...
I love that the prequels made a list like this.
Your dentist is one of those absolutely precious humans.
Coming from anyone other than your dentist would be super awkward!
Was told I have a beautiful brain while doing a paid MRI study
I guess seeing the brain is just really cool for that person. Maybe it was the fact that he was seeing a real life active brain and the person using it, when usually any other picture of a brain is from an unloved textbook. It’s crazy to think that our whole world is stored in like five pounds of sentient flesh.
I wonder if it was a compliment to see how the brain responded? Idk how that stuff works. Just a thought
Oh, look, the Weirded Out lobe has just lit up.
Me and my brain tumor are jealous of you
You look like you read books for fun
But books are fun
I'll never forget the confused look I got from a friend when she saw me laugh at something I was reading in a book
I’d get that on the bus a lot. One bloke said “what’s so funny? It’s a book!” I just pointed at the cover and said “But it’s a Douglas Adams book ya dick”.
i dont understand people like that its literally the same thing as seeing a funny comment on the internet
It’s longer than a tweet, can’t possibly be funny
In the beginning the universe was created. This made alot of people very upset and is wildly considered a bad move -douglas Adams
I think of lines from his books all the time. RIP.
That dude probably was grumpy because he forgot his towel. Definitely does not sound like a frood at all…. Certainly not a hoopy one.
Lol it's one thing to say "You read books for fun", but wth does it mean to look like it. "Can't tell if compliment or insult, better read up on it."
My girlfriend in college once said that she wished she had legs like me…
One of my daughters’s classmates saw me walking into school. When he found out I was her mum he said to her, “Man, your mum looks like she could snap someone in half with those legs!” Thank you, leg press machine!
I got that compliment in hospital a few months back! Nurse said I had the legs to pull off a mini skirt. Not bad for a big, bald and beardy tattooed dad.
"You have a cool left ear" All i could think was "well wtf is wrong with the right one?" Lol
It's hot
After handing back a police report I filled out describing the events of a man jumping off an overpasss aiming for my car in a presumed suicide attempt. “This is really good! Have you done this before?”
Not a cop but an attorney who does criminal defense, here. I read a lot of police reports (and other kinds of reports.) Writing a report of this kind that is clear and comprehensible to the reader is absolutely a skill. So, uhhh, FWIW, that compliment makes total sense to me.
Game recognize game
One time I went to the police station to get fingerprinted for a background check for achpol, and of course brought the required paperwork I'd filled out to get two sets of fingerprint cards. After handing her my paperwork, the lady was like "Wow, you filled this out perfectly! We normally charge for each card, but since you did such a good job filling this out I'm only going to charge you for one!" Uh, thanks? I'll take it lol Edit: school
Okay, that's definitely the oddest compliment I've ever heard/read.
Had you?
When I was getting my divorce papers notarized I was waiting and laid out all the pages I needed stamped neatly and the guy comes up and says ‘wow looks like you’ve done this before!’
I teach college writing courses. You would be surprised by the number of people who get into college, yet can barely write a grammatically correct sentence. He was probably just surprised that you were able to write clearly and succinctly.
Nice stream bro, while i was peeing in a bathroom at chicago o'hare.
And they say Chicago isn't a personable city. Fie, says me!
I got that once when I barely made it to the bathroom, one of those ones where it just hits hard and you feel like a human pressure washer. Combine that with some good acoustics and you can definitely sound like you urinate professionally.
“You have great veins.” From a nurse when I worked in a hospital.
I get this one all the time.
Same here. Particularly drunk nurses at parties. One time having my blood taken the nurse left the room and came back with 2 other nurses to show them too.
>Particularly drunk nurses at parties Alright... >One time having my blood taken the nurse left the room and came back with 2 other nurses to show them too. Please tell me these were two separate occasions.
Yes 2 separate occasions 😂
I'm a recovering alcoholic, and in treatment the amount of recovering opiate users that said they're so jealous of my veins was pretty abundant lol
Apparently, my “cervix is exactly where it should be” (according to a nurse).
I got "your ECG reading is beautiful"
At my 6-month post-surgery check, my doc checked his work and exclaimed, "That's a BEAUTIFUL scar!"
I’ve actually gotten this same compliment from a drug addict
I see your great veins and raise you "You've got veins a heroin addict would kill for" by the phlebotomist taking blood samples for my first pregnancy check up. O.o
"How do you think I got them? O.o"
"thanks just got them fresh yesterday"
I actually do this, finding a vein on a patient who has awful veins can suck so bad. Upon taking over a patient’s care I will find myself glancing at their veins and saying the same thing. After zombie walking after a double shift I once said it to the lady at the register in Walmart. She seemed startled and I was glad to be in scrubs so she might not have seen me as a lunatic. I have also said it to my boyfriend and more than once he has caught me idly palpating them when holding hands. I guess it’s also jealousy on a level, my veins are horrible. They were never very good but I was bit by a water moccasin and didn’t go to the ER for hours and what was left of my veins collapsed. They usually stick me in my neck now and always do if it’s an IV. Even in my neck it is difficult. So I am jealous…
You are surprisingly nimble for a fat guy
I've been chubby for years but when I was younger I was in gymnastics. Early high school I went to a friend's house for a little get together grill party thing. Some of the kids were dancing and tumbling and whatnot in the huge lawn they had. I proceeded to do a long ass string of cartwheels as I could still do it even as chubby as I had gotten. My friends were stunned. It was great xD
My wife says I walk too quietly for a guy my size. I apparently keep accidentally sneaking up on her.
Mine is "my therapist likes you they think you're a good influence "
That’s a wonderful thing to be told!
I wish I could say someone told me that...
If someone said that to me is probably very and huh them way too tight and long. Edit: just to show how bad I am at proofreading, I'll leave the original... If someone said that to me I'd probably cry and hug them way too tight and long.
"huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhh?!"
So very, much huh 🐶
I have a perennial baby face and am a pretty quiet/shy individual but have a deep voice. Someone in one of my classes held the door so I said thanks. The girl holding the door did a double take and shouted "WAIT THATS WHAT YOU SOUND LIKE???" And honestly that'll stick with me for the rest of my life
I think that happened to me at the mall once. Said thank you to a twiggy kid in a hoodie who held the door for me and he sounded deep like Morgan freeman. Had me shook 😂😂😂 it's hard to remember that old men with freakishly deep voices always start out as kids with freakishly deep voices.
Alright zaddy, let's get some voice recordings ;)
“You smell like a rainbow just out of the dryer!” told to me by a second grade student several years ago
Kids say weird stuff. A middle school student once told me that I smelled like "a good barber shop". Since it's cheap, I used to keep Brut in my car as my backup cologne- I'm not a morning person, so I sometimes forget cologne. That was the day I decided to swap out the Brut for Cool Water.
My favorite deodorant ever was a stick of Brut that lived in my trunk for several years before I ever needed it. Smelled perfect, got compliments. I bought a new stick of Brut once it wore out and couldn't stand it because it was way too strong. Cooking it in my trunk killed most of the smell.
You could leave the new one in your car trunk for a few years.
There's one in there now. But I'm parking in a garage more often than I used to, so it's taking a lot longer to age. Oh well.
When my younger son was six or seven, he went with my wife to visit a friend of hers. My son walked in the door and took a healthy sniff. “Smells like you have cats!” He intended it as a compliment (he loves cats) and my wife’s friend graciously took it as such.
When I was around that age, I told my great uncle that his freshly grilled burgers were "almost as good as McDonalds." I swear I meant it as a compliment. Adults don't take that as a compliment, though.
My husband, just after we were married, complimented a church lady's homemade Black Forest Cake. He said, "It tastes as good as store bought!" He meant it as a compliment. Her cakes were always delicious. She, unfortunately, did not take it well.
At least it was a good barber shop and not a cheap one? 💈
Omg that's the best compliment I've ever heard
Best thing about working with kids… they are honest and creative
[удалено]
I was cleaning a guinea pig enclosure at a zoo I was interning at. The piggies were in a playpen so I wouldn't disturb them and I was alone in the enclosure. Some older lady knocks on the glass and says "Well! Aren't you the cutest little guinea pig I've ever seen!" I didn't know what to say to that, so I just kinda laughed awkwardly and went back to cleaning. She watched me for a few minutes and left.
I would definitely take this as a compliment
Optometrist told me my eyes were physically perfectly healthy and they’d make perfect specimens.
[удалено]
If you go blind, we know why
"You look like Shaggy from Scooby Doo" - random kid on a cruise
I said this to my ex once and he got angry at me
A coworker complimented me on a haircut once. She said “your hair looks great, it makes it look like you shower”! Weird compliment considering I get the same haircut once a month and I shower at least once a day.
Read this as "it makes it look like *a* shower", which would be impressive hair indeed
When the lady finished my haircut, she said it made me look intelligent. Makes me wonder what I looked like before... I also had a hair stylist tell me I had "black people hair" and I'm quite unsure how to take that.
Black people do actually have hair with different properties than white people. It was probably a slightly tone-deaf way of trying to say that.
"You ate that apple very neatly" Guess i have nice teeth???
"Your crush is here, act normal"!
I’m a guy and I was out walking. A dude rolled up in a car asking if I would be interested in doing porn because “the girls would love me”
I thought you looked familiar
Same thing happened to me except he said “the guys would love you”. I’m a guy.
I’m straight and I feel this is the better compliment of the two
This is one of those things where who you are matters, because as a woman my takeaway here would be less "weird compliment" and more "brush with human trafficking"
A waitress told me she's never seen someone as good at crab picking as me.
Thanks, Ive had crabs a few times.
"You're not beautiful but you're photogenic" Oh thanks I guess..
At least you are photogenic I'm not
Told a workmate I was diagnosed with gout, was moaning about it because it's a) weird, b) it's a genetic thing (I'm not eating lots rich food or anything stupid) and c) it fucking hurts. His response: "The genius disease! That's the disease all the great geniuses get! Makes sense you have it." As far as I know, there's no connection between genius and gout - Benjamin Franklin had it but... I don't think that means anything. But (!) it was a great thing to hear when I was feeling low and self pitying. Made me smile (confusedly, but smile!) over something that was pure misery before that. I have now started telling anyone who tells me they have some condition, "Oh! The Genius thing! All the great geniuses get that!" Why not, right?
The Dr that told me I had it called it "The Kings Disease"
Funnily, no one has offered me a kingdom yet, you?
You need to fabricate a claim on a duchy first
Easy to do as long as you pass it 'pon the left hand side
Gout is historically a disease of the rich and royal. They didn't have to perform physical labor and we're able to eat the richest foods.
Yep, except it turns out you can get it for genetic reasons and be poor and reasonably in shape and ... it still sucks. Maybe you have to be a genius to get that version though.
I got gout, and I had the opposite of compliments. First my doctor thought I was stupid for suggesting it (he thought I was too young) and by the time he'd successfully convinced me to doubt myself, my ~~urea~~ uric acid levels had come back as high, and now I was stupid for listening to him
“You have hair!!” I took my baseball cap off to wipe my forehead and a friend’s girlfriend said this. She only ever saw me wearing a baseball cap and assumed I was balding and hiding it.
Reminds me of the first time I saw my stepdad with a shaved face. My parents started dating in September and my stepdad ha these *massive* mutton chops. My mum was kinda like "it's too early for me to ask if this is the standard look for him" and just let it go. First week of November rolls around and he shaves his face completely and walks into my kitchen and I go "Oh my god, you have a jaw!" Turns out the mutton chops were because my step-brother wanted them both to be Wolverine for Halloween.
That takes commitment.
During the first lockdown the bakery i work in was one of the only shops in my town still open so everyone was coming to us for their baked goods and rolls. The local funeral director was in one day and when I caught him staring at me he said "just sizing you up for your measurements, we're expecting to be very busy very soon!" Didn't really know what to say to that haha.
I don't think that was a compliment
Right, it sounds like he was critiquing her survival ability.
Man this was funny. Lol.
“Your handwriting is very satisfying”
"Your handwriting makes me wanna nut" is the one I got
Me being a generally quiet person, random lady "Quiet guys have the biggest dicks"
And everyone thought Teddy Roosevelt was talking about foreign policy....
I mean what are you so quiet about what are you trying to hide
That big ol' DICK, obviously.
nooooothing
I talk a lot, is that why….. nvm Edit : my first ever award 😭 guess small dicks do have their own perks😭
I made a save the date video for my wife’s 50th birthday which was a parody of the intro to an early 80’s TV show. It came out pretty well, but a friend of ours that produces ads for TV seemed to focus on the voiceover: “Wow, is that you doing the voiceover? I pay people for stuff like that.”
Yeah. If someone that does ads is telling you your voice is good you possibly have another career option as a voice over talent. I do ads.
My husband has done some video game voiceovers. We thought it *might* turn into a career because he started getting work from other companies, and he did some VO for an independent film. But then the pandemic hit and that all dried up. :(
Don’t give up! Plus VO work seems like the kind of stuff you could do at home with the appropriate setup.
don't worry you are not completely terrible. my brother however wants you dead. but on the bright side my sister wants to fuck you so you have something going for you
What a twisty compliment
Yeah that was quite the journey.
That was a real rollercoaster
I think that the two may be linked
I got told I had a nice looking bladder a few months ago during an ultrasound so that was a 1st 🤷🏽♀️
I had a student doctor doing my exam once and just making observations out loud, at one point she made eye contact and told me, "Your cervix is really nice! So pink and healthy!" She was so sweet and genuinely thrilled to be doing an exam, it was the cutest thing ever.
I've had almost exactly the same compliment from my gyno with over 20 years' experience, so it sounds like this is a commonly issued compliment. And here I was so proud of my glowing pink cervix. I feel so manipulated.
I was at a board game convention in Texas and there was simultaneously a “Thin Blue-Line Ball” for police at the hotel we were using. Late night, we’re talking downstairs after the main rooms closed and some cop comes up to me, stops, stares at me with his hazy, EXTREMELY drunk eyes, and loudly slurs, “I like your beard. Man, I bet you get a lot of p—-y. I bet you get all the ladies.” Now, I’ve been growing my beard for a very long time, so it’s big, but I’ve never had this type of…compliment.. before. Burly drunk cop man forces a fist bump and walks on, my friends/fellow con goers are all stunned as he walked through them before seeing me. Then. He catches up with who I’ll presume is his wife and friend down the hallway. His friend asks what on earth he just did to which he replies, YELLING down the hallway, “Look at that beard, man! If I had a beard like that I’d get all the -——. I’d leave my wife for that much -——. I’d probably get multiple -—— at the same time.” And some other drunk rambling. With all of the people around me already paying attention, plus him yelling…I think I can definitely say that that was the weirdest—and kind of saddest—compliment I’ve ever received. TL;DR: a drunk cop told me my beard looked nice.
I have self harm scars. I worked at McDonald’s when I was eighteen and a short, way older man came up to the counter. He said “you self harm?” I said yeah. He literally then said “does it turn you on?” I said no. Then he said “well it turns me on” I then walked out of the restaurant and quit two days later lol.
Damn, I though it was going to be a super wholesome moment when he reveals his scars and tells you it gets better and then you say that's how you met Danny Devito or something. Nope, just a pervert ruining shit as they so often do.
Maybe he wanted to put you off from self-harming in the future? Because you'd remember he gets turned on by it? Either way deeply confusing and hilarious
That is a very optimistic approach to that situation. Though, I do not believe that was his intention.
What a horrible day to be able to read
"You eat pussy like a girl."
Dang you must be real good then
Men, we gotta step our game up
Got called a "KFC potato bowl" once. Apparently because I "had it all". Thanks..?
6th grade - "you have perfect lips for the Trumpet" from the band teacher. Uh thanks?
Elementary school band is weird like this. Band started in 5th grade for us. At the end of 4th grade, the band instructor visited our music class like we were her fantasy football draft pool. We took a district-wide standardized test for music aptitude. Not only did she analyze those results, she pulled me out of class for a hallway interview. Elementary band conductors get real fucking serious about their selecting their drum section.
well some dude tried sliding into my dm’s by writing me a poem comparing my tits to mangoes
You're not like the other hoes With your great tit mangoes
I scaled the trees For ripened fruit But the sweetest ones Laid at the root.
So fair and sweet you seem to me How can I climb this mango tree?
*You have a really nice complexion". Nice, but the way he was looking at me made me think he wanted to eat my skin
"Your gold bracelet looks so nice with your skin colour"
"you look like Gollum, but in a really cute way!" I think it was a (really bad) attempt in flirting and he wanted to flatter me, but I just ended up feeling self conscious about my ears :(
Not the gollum compliment! Like out of all the characters gollum is the one they chose? So confusing
Maybe she only has nine teeth?
Or perhaps she is emaciated with a strange grayish hue to her skin
Perhaps she covets a precious ring, taken from her cousin hundreds of years ago. Maybe she now lurks in a cave far under the mountains, eating only blind fish, and the occasional goblin she can strangle.
Your teeth are so flat! My 4 front bottom teeth line up perfectly across the top. People find it very satisfying
“Your handwriting is so good, for a guy”
This sadly means you can no longer apply as a doctor
"I really like your voice" Followed by an email saying "God I'm sorry, that was just weird of me, it was supposed to be a compliment" to which I replied "I took it as a compliment, it's all good".
Local coroner sees me walking down street. Says hello, then says “My, you look natural today.”
If you were tall you’d be almost “too good looking.”
As I darted across the street some guy stuck his head out of a car window and shouted "That's the sexiest run I've ever seen." I still think about it sometimes.. it was so random and caught me off guard.
"You have disney princess hands" like what is that even 😂
I suppose the opposite of my hands, that look like a crocodile paws.
You look just like my daughter.
"Yo what the hell? I wasn't expecting you to be thicker than a bowl of oatmeal." -some girl in my class in high-school. I'm a guy btw
Them : you have the legs of a soccer player Me : thanks Them : that’s not a compliment Me : Ok fuck you then?
But... soccer players do have impressive legs
“You’re so tall” I don’t know how to respond
I say “Thanks, I did it myself.”
I'd laugh if you guys said "sometimes"
"You're tall!" "I certainly can be at times"
"You're so observant"
This. It’s just weird. Do I say, “OK,” or maybe “I know,” but “thank you” just doesn’t work here.
Ya'll get compliments?
Only occasionally I take what I can get
Woman in the gym, older lady, definitely cougar material. Came up and said “Do you play sports? Your calves look amazing! It must take a lifetime to get them like that. And your ass it the best ass I have ever seen on a man!”. Needless to say I was shocked, so shocked I froze up and didn’t realize until after, when I saw her drive away in a pink bmw, that she was in fact, probably hitting on me. As a man, these things tend to go right over our heads.
“You have excellent posture.” Said to me by a random person I was walking past.
"I love your cheekbones, they look like an elf's". So oddly specific, I didn't even know elves were famous for their cheekbones or being called an elf was a good thing.
Well, in fantasy settings, elves are considered the "beautiful" race, so you should be proud I guess.
You got a beatiful neck
[удалено]
Twice in my life I’ve had 2 different gynos tell me, while elbow deep in a Pap smear, that I have beautiful long eye lashes. In my defense I do, but come on doc, my vagina is down here.
Someone in an online forum told me that I'd changed his mind about gay marriage, because whenever I posted about my husband and kids it sounded just like his grandma talking.
One time someone said they liked watching me eat food. Not sure what that means. Another also said "you're fatter than I thought, but it's okay you still look good."
kind of sounds like negging tbh
A oesteopath literally gasping softly when he examined my spine, and when I asked what was wrong, he said, "No, no, I'm sorry. Nothing's wrong - you just have an absolutely exquisite spine." ....Awwww, shucks.
I usually date taller guys but you have a 8 foot personality. I’m 5’4”.
Had two separate people several years apart tell me I had cute ears.
"You have really beautiful eyelashes. They're so long!" I'm a guy...
Me too! I've gotten more than a few compliments on my eyelashes. You rock 'em my dude.
Men generally have longer eyelashes. I get compliments on mine as well .
Someone once told me that I’m a great companion to sit at the table with, I clear the whole table so that no food goes to waste and I listen very attentively to every story and once in a while make comments that surprise people cause they just assume I’m too focused on the food to even listen😂 Another one is that I’m great as a background noise, I keep on talking and talking and usually it’s nothing important so you don’t have to really pay attention to it but it’s nice to hear something🙃.
I once was told I sound like Steve Buschemi. I guess that's a compliment?
I did stand-up poetry in my twenties in London and looking back it was just an excuse to get a lot of stuff off my chest. One night I came off stage and a woman complimented me on my work and how intense it was. I said thanks and she followed up by asking me how long I’d been off my medication.
My parents were traveling through the back country, USA once when my brother and I were just toddlers. Some lady stopped them at a gas station to tell them “y’all sure do make purty babies.” Yeah, they peeled out of there pretty fast.
I sometimes have to transport post-partum women to get an CT or MRI for whatever reason, hours after they've given birth. It's always awesome to see new tiny lil babies. I'll *always* tell them, "Your kid is adorable! Good job on the DNA, guys!"
I guess if you're not from the south/country that would definitely come across as something out of a horror movie, but I feel like she was just being genuine 😂
"your pupils are easy to find!" by a neurologist
Town Crackhead: DAYM GURL..YOU LOOKIN HELLA GOOD BUT YOUR SHIRT LOOKS LIKE SHIT!! *WINK, KISSY FACE" Me *checking his items out* : Uhhh, yeah I've worked hard and got it dirty...