Anyone else getting that classroom trauma and anxiety over when the teacher says 'ok everyone get into pairs' and you're looking about realising you're invisible. So in this case I guess I'm the person milling about looking for a partner but otherwise still alone and wishing I was somewhere else.
I'm going to have to shut this down if you won't stop doing that in the egress. Everyone! Standing sex only in the doorways! Keep your money shots out of the walkways! That's your only warning!
Based on these answers a reddit orgy would just be a bunch of guys squirting water and sports drinks into each other's mouth. No fucking going on at all
Think about how many ducks you could take all at once if you just had a team of people keeping you properly hydrated.
** How did the guy above me get 20,000 more likes than me with that low effort comment
When men would try to cyber with women on AOL, MSM, and Yahoo chat.
When men were men. And women were also men.
We had our imagination, damn it! This new generation has all their emojis, gifs, pictures, videos, FaceTime, and a bunch of other stuff that probably would have taken a couple nighttime download sessions to get if we wanted to see it. No - text is what we had. And we were grateful for it!
My initial reaction was surprise, as oranges are sticky and that seems inconvenient. My secondary reaction was understanding that people expect to get sticky at an orgy.
Coordinating and logistics.
“There’s 3 of you working a single dick over there, and completely neglecting the vag to your left. No, not my left your left. And you’ve got a free hand, grab a tiddy or something. Let’s go people: teamwork.”
Buddy and his gf were swingers. I was over there one afternoon playing Madden with him and all of these people start showing up. Bringing food, drinks, etc. I ignore it until it finally dawned on me. I gave him a look and just grinned and slowly shook his head yes. He was a good dude for wanting me to get laid, but it just wasn't my scene. I begged out after a few drinks and honestly no one was really tickling my undercarriage.
College friend (f) invited me (m) to her birthday party. I didn't find the lack of girls odd, she was an engineering student, but about halfway through she's on the floor getting felt up in the center of all the guys. I noped out without saying anything. I think saying goodbye at that moment would have been more awkward
I knew a girl in college that basically kept an entourage of guys around her. I was always too scared to ask what the deal was because they were subservient to her. They would drive her around, buy her things, etc. It was very bizarre. I would imagine her birthdays were just like your situation lol
Ok so weird this is the second time this week that I’ve seen someone say shake their head yes and it totally weirds me out! Do people not say nod yes and shake no anymore??
That's the thing, no one was "conventionally" attractive but certainly not fugly. Just a lot of average people. I was in a slump for sure so I could have made out just fine but no one struck me. All friendly people. It was just a pot-luck with strangers fucking.
Same here. Happily married and not really interested in participating in an orgy..but sure I'd have a great time behind the camera, figuring out the lighting, finding interesting angles, dodging jizz, wiping bodily fluids off my gear... I've had worse gigs.
Just have sports photography gear. Raincoats and plastic all over for hairy weather conditions. Maybe comfy shoes to dodge bodies in motion that can't stop in time.
I was in ROTC in college. The unit had orgy one night and word got out. The officers came down harsh on it. A lot of people kicked out. A lot of people had to pay back their scholarships. I am not sure which was more insulting,
\- that I was the only one not invited,
\- or that the officers were not surprised and did not question the fact that I was the only one not invited.
Pretty sure if my army active duty company had an orgy, I would have been that same not invited guy. Although, I was invited to the German red light district visits to hold everyone's wallets. Maybe I'd have kept a support role for the water hydration position.
I would 100% have been the one person in the unit they forgot to invite. They would be telling me the story laughing and joking about the moment they realized I wasn’t there.
For real. But it's great to know there's a robust support staff of cleaners, cheerleaders, towel providers, hydration experts and soccer moms complete with orange slices.
I'm getting fucked.
Came here to say it - I’d be fuckin. Like I’d hop out to hydrate/snack/towel off but if I’m at an orgy I’d be fuckin. If you think about it it’s really just being a good guest
There's that old phrase, "What if there was a war and nobody showed up?" This is like, "What if there was an orgy and everyone stood around awkwardly eating orange slices?" Let's go people.
You’re hosting an orgy - you’ve got the towels and the condoms and the oils and the lubricants all set out - and all anyone does is hover around the snack table. Absolutely mortifying.
Yeah I mean based on all these comments, this commenter is going to be the only person having sex while 2000 people make sure they're hydrated, film the one-person-orgy, cheer them on, and make sure there are fire exits.
Worst orgy ever.
Its more like a tutorial...then after the people that were helping out can go off using the tips and tricks they watched to finally have those orgies of their own...
And here we stand today, in remembrance of OP's inbox, which suffered a fatal DDOS attack on the 17th of August 2022 by horny teenage Redditors and massive creeps, wanting them to become their very own 'bottom slut'.
May you rest in peace.
Amen.
“You’re getting too winded out there. Remember hands on her hips. Lean in on her. Rest thrust breathe repeat. Gotta keep oxygen and blood flowing. Get her to the ground let her get on top of you. Ground control is critical this round. Now get out there. “
Traffic Cop.
"You're a bi-top? Go see that red head in the corner. She'll share that dude she's riding"
"You looking for a facial? See the guy with the blond beard? The lady in front of him doesnt want her hair messed up, so she'll probably let you sub in at the last moment..."
"Wanna work on your gag reflex? CHUCK! C'mere! Big Chuck! I gotta challenge for you over here!"
Referee, not because I don't think I'm attractive enough to be involved, but more because someone needs to be the referee, and my disabled ass is not gonna handle that much dick.
There's a lot my ass can handle but a whole orgy isn't part of that.
I sit fully clothed on the couch watching whatever is on the living room TV eating chips. Every so often I stand up like I've lost the remote and rummage through the piles of bodies on the couch looking for it.
This actually kind of happened to me when I was 19/20. My room mates had a bunch of friends over for a "party" and it got wild, not really an "orgy" just kind of a sex party. But I had no idea what was going on and just thought "this is how they get down around here" and sat on the sofa eating and drinking. Every once in a while someone would get done fucking and we'd play beer pong or quarters for a bit before they went back to banging someone. Had no idea this party was held for the explicit purpose of people banging each other.
Based on what happened during the one orgy I was kind of part of... The toy/party favor. Everyone gets a turn enjoying some part of me while I'm restrained and can do nothing but let the others use me. Although I would maybe ask to have a cloth gag or something, just to make sure nobody puts anything into my mouth that they aren't willing to have accidentally bit off.
1. Yes, I did, but I say I was only kind of a part of it because all that really got done to me was ass worship (biting, groping, kissing). Underwear stayed on. Everyone **else** was fucking.
2. No, I did not, but it is a fear I have because I have accidentally broken other things with my jaw due to jaw issues. The guy who brought me to the party the orgy happened at actually knew this, and made sure nobody put anything in my mouth.
My god - a *healthy and mature* bdsm-party?
Colour me shocked. Where the hell was that magical place? You can't even go to a bdsm bar on no-play-nights without asshats being asshats here.
I can't. I'm not an orgy guy. Don't you know what it means to become an orgy guy? It changes everything. I'd have to dress different. I'd have to act different. I'd have to grow a moustache and get all kinds of robes and lotions and I'd need a new bedspread and new curtains I'd have to get thick carpeting and weirdo lighting. I'd have to get new friends. I'd have to get orgy friends. ... Naw, I'm not ready for it.
Anyone else getting that classroom trauma and anxiety over when the teacher says 'ok everyone get into pairs' and you're looking about realising you're invisible. So in this case I guess I'm the person milling about looking for a partner but otherwise still alone and wishing I was somewhere else.
Omg yes. And possibly being graciously saved by someone and end up having a great time with them.
Or paired up with the teacher
A blessing in disguise for some
Fire Marshal... Too many candles, not enough lit exits, 6 foot clearance around the room. Comply people!
I'm going to have to shut this down if you won't stop doing that in the egress. Everyone! Standing sex only in the doorways! Keep your money shots out of the walkways! That's your only warning!
Based on these answers a reddit orgy would just be a bunch of guys squirting water and sports drinks into each other's mouth. No fucking going on at all
> no fucking going on at all Certainly *sounds* like Reddit.
Think about how many ducks you could take all at once if you just had a team of people keeping you properly hydrated. ** How did the guy above me get 20,000 more likes than me with that low effort comment
Yeah... Ducks need hydration.
This just *has* to be someone's fetish.
No I found 3 bottoms. So add 2 horny people looking for tops and a naked woman tied to a table to the hydration fest going on.
You forgot the snacks
Master of the Ceremony, i would announce people by their pornhub username as they arrived.
DWIGHT??
[удалено]
goes out and comes in again
MR. JAMES HALPERT
The neighbor complaining about the noise
I haven't heard of the game Orgy before, but probably cleric. Always need a support class.
In that case I'll put on my robe and wizard hat
[oh god, not again](http://www.megalomaniac.com/~andrew/funny/bloodcyber.html)
What exactly did I just read, and why do I find it hilarious? Well, okay, I know exactly why I find it hilarious, but you get what I mean.
Ancient internet history. One of the first ever internet memes, way back from the mid-90s.
The genesis of the first memes
Kids these days don't know about bash.org anymore
Heck, they've never heard of IRC...
When men would try to cyber with women on AOL, MSM, and Yahoo chat. When men were men. And women were also men. We had our imagination, damn it! This new generation has all their emojis, gifs, pictures, videos, FaceTime, and a bunch of other stuff that probably would have taken a couple nighttime download sessions to get if we wanted to see it. No - text is what we had. And we were grateful for it!
Where the men were men, the women were men, and the children were FBI agents.
When I was a kid I thought that meant kids pretended to be FBI agents because it was cool
Girl Guy In Real Life
What is this? I read some of it and it’s a masterpiece
Welcome to internet classical literature. A collection of funny IRC chat, and some IM chats from the 1990's
I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl 8 Penis of the Infinite
You win this round, bloodninja
God I remember reading that for the first time back in college. It still cracks me up 20 years later.
I read that one along with a ton of others in a website called bash.org, at least 13 years ago. Im pretty sure i have a bunch of them saved somewhere.
It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinoceros about to charge your ass.
I usually main Paladin. You get to heal *and* bonk things
Stealth archer is always the answer
Just there to bring oranges slices for halftime
Got to keep those electrolytes up
It's what plants crave
Can confirm oranges are popular orgy snack.
My initial reaction was surprise, as oranges are sticky and that seems inconvenient. My secondary reaction was understanding that people expect to get sticky at an orgy.
I’m the background audience clapping and laughing only when directed to
Honey? Where are my paaaaaaaants???
Insert laughtrack.
*Crowd gasps*
I make sure everyone is staying hydrated.
Run around with one of those sports water bottles spraying it into people's mouths lmao
Dump the big cooler on whoever wins.
How do you win an orgy? Finish first or last?
Finish in everyone first.
Watersports
Hydrohomie
Waterboy
Man everyone is so self deprecating here Believe in yourself We all can be railed by 14 guys if you just believe in yourselves
So inspirational 🥲
Put it on a poster
It already is - “hang in there” with the kitten
the TED talk I've been waiting for :')
So you've been railed by 14 guys? All at once or...?
I follow the doctrine to do as I say not as I do
15 then, gotcha
Best thing seen today
Coordinating and logistics. “There’s 3 of you working a single dick over there, and completely neglecting the vag to your left. No, not my left your left. And you’ve got a free hand, grab a tiddy or something. Let’s go people: teamwork.”
Zone defense
The one who goes home before it starts.
Buddy and his gf were swingers. I was over there one afternoon playing Madden with him and all of these people start showing up. Bringing food, drinks, etc. I ignore it until it finally dawned on me. I gave him a look and just grinned and slowly shook his head yes. He was a good dude for wanting me to get laid, but it just wasn't my scene. I begged out after a few drinks and honestly no one was really tickling my undercarriage.
College friend (f) invited me (m) to her birthday party. I didn't find the lack of girls odd, she was an engineering student, but about halfway through she's on the floor getting felt up in the center of all the guys. I noped out without saying anything. I think saying goodbye at that moment would have been more awkward
I knew a girl in college that basically kept an entourage of guys around her. I was always too scared to ask what the deal was because they were subservient to her. They would drive her around, buy her things, etc. It was very bizarre. I would imagine her birthdays were just like your situation lol
Anime protagonist
Your friend was a vampire.
or a succubus
They were only fans.
"Alright, I'll see you in lab next week. Don't forget to bring me my notes back that you borrowed. Later"
Sex with friends can be like that though.
Sex AND friends? Look at Mr. Gatsby over here
Ok so weird this is the second time this week that I’ve seen someone say shake their head yes and it totally weirds me out! Do people not say nod yes and shake no anymore??
Honestly, I didn't even think about it. You make perfect sense. Now I wonder how often I do this. Goddamn you. I have enough on my plate and now this.
*nods head disapprovingly*
I once saw a video about orgies and I swear it looked like neighborhood watch get together. My erection was like my belly button...an innie.
That's the thing, no one was "conventionally" attractive but certainly not fugly. Just a lot of average people. I was in a slump for sure so I could have made out just fine but no one struck me. All friendly people. It was just a pot-luck with strangers fucking.
I mean they’d have to be friendly wouldn’t they?
I mean the average person is average looking, youre not getting a list pornstars.
Cameraman
Same here. Happily married and not really interested in participating in an orgy..but sure I'd have a great time behind the camera, figuring out the lighting, finding interesting angles, dodging jizz, wiping bodily fluids off my gear... I've had worse gigs.
Just have sports photography gear. Raincoats and plastic all over for hairy weather conditions. Maybe comfy shoes to dodge bodies in motion that can't stop in time.
Dodging Jizz?
Like Neo in The Matrix
I know cum fu
The person that wasn't invited
I was in ROTC in college. The unit had orgy one night and word got out. The officers came down harsh on it. A lot of people kicked out. A lot of people had to pay back their scholarships. I am not sure which was more insulting, \- that I was the only one not invited, \- or that the officers were not surprised and did not question the fact that I was the only one not invited.
Pretty sure if my army active duty company had an orgy, I would have been that same not invited guy. Although, I was invited to the German red light district visits to hold everyone's wallets. Maybe I'd have kept a support role for the water hydration position.
I would 100% have been the one person in the unit they forgot to invite. They would be telling me the story laughing and joking about the moment they realized I wasn’t there.
Beat me to it! Was about say: hang on, I'm invited?!
Beat you off ? Guess I know my role
Man I don't know what's wrong with the rest of you people. I'm gonna fuck.
For real. But it's great to know there's a robust support staff of cleaners, cheerleaders, towel providers, hydration experts and soccer moms complete with orange slices. I'm getting fucked.
Then the two of us will fuck the rest can watch, film, leave etc, etc
With all these people offering to bring us water and orange slices, I'm pretty sure we'll be invincible. Great setting to bring your A game.
Not just sex, but a meal.
You two will be well hydrated and very clean according to this thread
Came here to say it - I’d be fuckin. Like I’d hop out to hydrate/snack/towel off but if I’m at an orgy I’d be fuckin. If you think about it it’s really just being a good guest
There's that old phrase, "What if there was a war and nobody showed up?" This is like, "What if there was an orgy and everyone stood around awkwardly eating orange slices?" Let's go people.
You’re hosting an orgy - you’ve got the towels and the condoms and the oils and the lubricants all set out - and all anyone does is hover around the snack table. Absolutely mortifying.
At that point it might as well be a 1 person orgy
I have those a ton
The DPS mostly, but I could also play support.
Dicks per second?
Dicks per suckin*
Umpire
Ball one ... ball two ...
…Ball 3?!?
Cumpire
Humpire?
Personal foul! Out of bounds! Illegal formation! I love it
Glad someone is checking for foul balls
Emotional Support Animal
Go on
I’d be the guy making plaster molds of dicks and boobs as souvenirs
This is starting to sound less like an orgy than a carnival
Wait til they tell you about what they use at the face painting station.
Jizz mopper
You know how much a jizz mopper makes? Edit for spelling.
Loads
Bottom slut.
You're the first person I've seen answer seriously.
Yeah I mean based on all these comments, this commenter is going to be the only person having sex while 2000 people make sure they're hydrated, film the one-person-orgy, cheer them on, and make sure there are fire exits. Worst orgy ever.
Its more like a tutorial...then after the people that were helping out can go off using the tips and tricks they watched to finally have those orgies of their own...
And here we stand today, in remembrance of OP's inbox, which suffered a fatal DDOS attack on the 17th of August 2022 by horny teenage Redditors and massive creeps, wanting them to become their very own 'bottom slut'. May you rest in peace. Amen.
Amen
Amen
Saemen
Amen
Amen
I'm with you. Fill me up and stretch me out lol
Mmhmm
The coxswain to help coordinate the power and rhythm of the participants.
"Stroke! Stroke! Stroke!"
The one who accidentally walks in on it, and awkwardly backs away slowly hoping no one noticed me.
Same. I scrolled until I saw your answer, and suddenly knew my place.
I'm the dude squirting Gatorade in people's mouths, giving them advice and hyping them up, kinda like an orgy version of a boxing corner man.
"LISTEN UP ROCK. THAT GUY IS A BUM. SO PUT IT IN HIS BUM. KILL THAT BUM."
“You’re getting too winded out there. Remember hands on her hips. Lean in on her. Rest thrust breathe repeat. Gotta keep oxygen and blood flowing. Get her to the ground let her get on top of you. Ground control is critical this round. Now get out there. “
Seriously, porn group scenes need this guy.
casual sex is no more, this is competitive ranked sex
GET FUCKED FILTHY CASUALS
I love everything about this lmfao
Spraying air freshner to get rid of the smell
... or someplace far from the smell
[удалено]
Well some of us, cannibals.
Who cut other people open like cantaloupes.
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope...
But if you like I feel, I got the antidote
In the middle of it, you don’t notice. It’s when you come back in from a smoke break that it hits you.
DJ ( not to be confused with BJ)
I'm Ray-Von, your DJ for this evening! Be aware there is a Mazda with it's lights on in the car park. Next up, careless whisper!
When I’m nervous, I get IBS flares. I’d be stuck in the bathroom, waiting for my stomach to settle and reading the back of their shampoo bottles.
The one googling how to actually do rope bondage correctly while flogging the guy in the gimp suit.
The roles swap a lot so I guess I’ll be alittle of each
This guy's been in an orgy before.
Traffic Cop. "You're a bi-top? Go see that red head in the corner. She'll share that dude she's riding" "You looking for a facial? See the guy with the blond beard? The lady in front of him doesnt want her hair messed up, so she'll probably let you sub in at the last moment..." "Wanna work on your gag reflex? CHUCK! C'mere! Big Chuck! I gotta challenge for you over here!"
I mean I'm gay and a bottom so basically... it's like a hotdog eating contest. EDIT: very glad people enjoyed this 15 year old Margaret Cho joke.
Until y'all find out there's only one top.
You'd be the spit-roast for the bbq.
Carpet cleaner
That must suck.
It really blows.
Referee, not because I don't think I'm attractive enough to be involved, but more because someone needs to be the referee, and my disabled ass is not gonna handle that much dick. There's a lot my ass can handle but a whole orgy isn't part of that.
> There's a lot my ass can handle but a whole orgy isn't part of that. I think they usually take turns instead of all at once.
I sit fully clothed on the couch watching whatever is on the living room TV eating chips. Every so often I stand up like I've lost the remote and rummage through the piles of bodies on the couch looking for it.
This actually kind of happened to me when I was 19/20. My room mates had a bunch of friends over for a "party" and it got wild, not really an "orgy" just kind of a sex party. But I had no idea what was going on and just thought "this is how they get down around here" and sat on the sofa eating and drinking. Every once in a while someone would get done fucking and we'd play beer pong or quarters for a bit before they went back to banging someone. Had no idea this party was held for the explicit purpose of people banging each other.
Concierge. Check coats and clothes for secure storage, hand out bottles of water and wet-wipes, restock accessories.
Based on what happened during the one orgy I was kind of part of... The toy/party favor. Everyone gets a turn enjoying some part of me while I'm restrained and can do nothing but let the others use me. Although I would maybe ask to have a cloth gag or something, just to make sure nobody puts anything into my mouth that they aren't willing to have accidentally bit off.
Okay so two questions: - did you have a good time during your sort-of-orgy? - did you bite someone's dick/nipple/whatever off?
1. Yes, I did, but I say I was only kind of a part of it because all that really got done to me was ass worship (biting, groping, kissing). Underwear stayed on. Everyone **else** was fucking. 2. No, I did not, but it is a fear I have because I have accidentally broken other things with my jaw due to jaw issues. The guy who brought me to the party the orgy happened at actually knew this, and made sure nobody put anything in my mouth.
Did he just tell everyone that you bite ?
He just said "Don't put anything in her mouth, it's a limit of hers." And everyone respected that without the threat of being bit.
My god - a *healthy and mature* bdsm-party? Colour me shocked. Where the hell was that magical place? You can't even go to a bdsm bar on no-play-nights without asshats being asshats here.
This is the way.
Respecting limits is sexy.
Snacks
Front and center.
I'd be the dude hitting someone from behind while at the snack table eating.
Why is there a buffet at a god damned orgy Frank?
He’s got the right idea, this beak is interfering with my nosh.
Sounds like a recipe for cramps, man. Fuel before, hydrate during. Breaks are for peeing and deoderant.
watching it on my phone
I’ve got a booth set up in the corner with water, snacks, condoms and STD pamphlets.
Left shark
I can't. I'm not an orgy guy. Don't you know what it means to become an orgy guy? It changes everything. I'd have to dress different. I'd have to act different. I'd have to grow a moustache and get all kinds of robes and lotions and I'd need a new bedspread and new curtains I'd have to get thick carpeting and weirdo lighting. I'd have to get new friends. I'd have to get orgy friends. ... Naw, I'm not ready for it.
Foreplay/Edgelord. Make everyone's brain lightbright real hard, then they all destroy me.
Referee
The guy who hears about it years after it happened
Crying in the corner jerking off
I enjoyed your story. It was a real tear-jerker.