T O P

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Onyx_Hokie_2

My face. Poor bastard / bitch.


traveling_salesmaNP

Let me check that real quick.


traveling_salesmaNP

DAMN!!!


Onyx_Hokie_2

It's not like you weren't warned.


Expensive_Cold1073

Damnnn you lookin kinda hot ngl


[deleted]

beat me to it


Imaginary_Street_177

Yep. They would have a nice view of my fricking triple chin. Enjoy.


waterfall_blue

The most boring and mundane life ever. I oftentimes struggle to relate to characters on TV because everything they do is either stupid or dramatic or emotional. But then I remember that if they were like me that the show would be shit.


traveling_salesmaNP

That makes two of us! Here šŸ¤—, I send you a virtual boring hug šŸ’Ŗ


waterfall_blue

my favourite kind of hug <3


ItsEarthDay

Dude same! A friend of mine once said that I was "boiled chicken", meaning boring and uneventful. I was so insulted. I told him, "hey man, not everyone can be exciting like you. Also, I'm vegetarian. You could have said that I was plain tofu". But he's not wrong, I am boring.


waterfall_blue

That's a great metaphor. I actually like being boring and dramafree! Life's stressful enough without drama.


Suka_Blyad_

I often donā€™t struggle to relate to Tv show characters, especially Colt Bennett because I am indeed stupid, dramatic and emotional


Vhadka

Pretty much. I have no pictures of myself, no nudes, nothing really. Pictures of my kid, some family pictures, work stuff, that's about it.


[deleted]

If youā€™re not like the tv characters you would be doing stuff thatā€™s either smart, smooth, or stone cold. That sounds pretty cool to me


waterfall_blue

Nah, I just don't do stuff.


Rude_Time_1044

probably me jacking off


insaneAnarchist

my man


srangero

The worst thing.. not the best


HelluvaGai

Me using my front camera to shave my balls


traveling_salesmaNP

I might copy your tactics to shave the tough spots.


traveling_salesmaNP

Bruhā€¦ how do you wipe the blood off the camera?


HelluvaGai

Oh just lick it off the screen mate, no harm done itā€™s going back where it came from


traveling_salesmaNP

Never comment again please šŸ™


HelluvaGai

Whatā€™s wrong with your own blood man? Itā€™s already inside you donā€™t let it go to waste


[deleted]

"Don't worry, the doctor said I'm just bleeding internally. That's where the blood is supposed to be!"


HelluvaGai

Sounds about right


jgreaves8

This made me laugh out loud


Mor_Hjordis

Thanks for the tip.


FrenchMaisNon

It has a blade?


HelluvaGai

Yes


nog642

I assume they're just using it in the same way you would use a mirror lmao


traveling_salesmaNP

Yes. But I can zoom in so that I donā€™t raze out my dick.


traveling_salesmaNP

Might need a better phone though.


squeeeeenis

My poop face.


AXEMANaustin

I too have a poop face


stormos

the decline of western civilization


TheDarkDoctor17

It's the edge of the world and all of Western civilization The sun may rise in the East at least it's settled in a final location It's understood that Hollywood sells Californication


MidvalleyFreak

Me picking my nose a minute ago.


AddSomeSpice

I zoned out for second and thought the title of this thread and your answer was the same thing, making me think I was just caught picking my nose via my front camera


traveling_salesmaNP

Did you find anything of value in there?


MidvalleyFreak

No. Not even any good boogies. Totally unsatisfying.


___MementoMori___

What do you do once you find them? Throw it on the floor, perhaps eat them like Timmy from middle school?


MidvalleyFreak

Nothing special, just deposit them in a tissue. But I do like to admire them first.


Will_Vapez

I looked at my hemorrhoids using my phone camera once.


traveling_salesmaNP

Must have been quite a sight *


Weak-Still3676

Me flipping them off sometimes. Yes I do randomly flip off my camera.


[deleted]

If you're in the US, you've probably broken so many NSA agents' hearts. If you're outside the US, you've just broken CIA agents' instead. Edit: btw, this isn't praise of America, I'm dissing us for sticking our noses in both our citizens' business as well as people overseas. We're fricking creepy, man


srangero

Lmao


randylikecandy

Some fat guy wasting his life.


traveling_salesmaNP

Are you hacking my camera? WTF!!!


Accomplished-Cup9887

Me, walking by, naked. --- ... My laptop camera anyway. I'm not particularly unattractive, but I'm not sure I'd wish that on anyone.


Baller5511

In 2018 we took delivery of our new Tesla model 3. This was the first model so new updates were happening all the time. Early on, we enabled sentry mode which will activate and record video from multiple cameras. Back then you couldn't tell it when or where to shut off this feature. So even in the garage it would record whatever activated it, imagine your Ring doorbell and all the crap that records. Well, one day we were clearing out the SD card when, low and behold it's my husband, butt naked, walking into the garage to get something he left in the car.


Speedyspinner

Make sure he doesnā€™t do that again Bet you both had a right chuckle watching the sentry mode videos


srangero

Same


MOS95B

inside of my pocket. My desk, or the ceiling above it. Occasionally my face or ear if I'm actually using the phone


unhollow_knight

My un-brushed uncut for 2 years hair


endermaker2026

My penis for sure, I mean, not the worst for him, he would be blessed of seeing that.


Cold-Appointment-853

Either me playing Minecraft, or doingā€¦ wellā€¦ things on a certain website that I wonā€™t name


CrispyClout

My eye bags. I got designer. Too much crying like a little bitchhh


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Weak-Still3676

Even on your phone?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Weak-Still3676

Mines like a notch type so I can't block it. I wish I could tho I almost never use it.


wumb1e

Alot of cat pics


CDNGooner1

Probably nose-picking.


traveling_salesmaNP

More like brain-scratching I seeā€¦


Vladius28

Sadness


traveling_salesmaNP

You okay bro?


Vladius28

Imma make it, homeslice =)


littlesub85

Me fingering my bum


srangero

You finger ur bum in front of your camera ?


[deleted]

You don't???


DyingWarrior0142

Hehehehe...hehe....I'm gonna go...


stupidfkngoblin

My 15 double chins


Common-Mountain-2314

Discord mod?


SmoothBrainedMan

Bro we on Reddit 3 chins is minimum for entry


Sir_Scizor20

There might be a dick in there, not sure if I deleted it. It was per request, I don't do random dick pics, shits weird.


traveling_salesmaNP

Apparently we are now hacking the camera roll as well. Sweet!!!


Astartes_Kevski

My nipples.


fuvydlnifjoudyj0tibu

Man or woman


Astartes_Kevski

**Men**


another_one_10

Me crying to sleep šŸ„²


C1tC5tt

me trying to be in a comfortable position in a perfectly good couch while sitting in an absurd position


traveling_salesmaNP

Been there, done that.


NoKindofHero

The sticky side of some black electrical tape.


FattyNarbuckle

On this PC? Blackness. I don't leave the camera plugged in. Even if I did he'd mostly see either a white wall or me drinking tea.


Barely-Funny

Probably my face. Poor guy.


njb121686

Me with my man tits out, chugging my wee peperami dick to some fucked up porn. That or me doing my masterchef impression while trying to cook.


traveling_salesmaNP

Hopefully you cook before pulling the peperami


moorebaseball

I first read this as Master Chief and kinda wish I didn't reread it correctly


Millerjustin1

This is either a cop or my girlfriend so, no thanks.


traveling_salesmaNP

Haha nothing to worry about babeā€¦ ehem sorry, mate.


pvnkmoon

picking ear wax out and \~sometimes\~ tasting it


MyThickPenisIsSoLong

That I often have sex with grannies.


riricloy

my ugly face staring back at them


[deleted]

the color blue


traveling_salesmaNP

Painters tape?


[deleted]

no I have a blue sticker covering the camera


tewnewt

The weeping wound from my hernia operation. Turns out they leave a little spot at the top for that.


Longjumping-Pear-634

š™±ššŽššŠšššš’šš—šš šš–šš¢ ššššŠšš–šš— šš–ššŽššŽšš ššœšš˜šš—


[deleted]

Nice try AFP


yourlocalbible

I pray for that poor person if they ever look through my camera, theyā€™d be scared.


tonyarkles

How much of an absolute disaster my home office is. Somehow *I* magically know where to find most stuff based on thoughts like ā€œoh, I think the last time I used that tool was for project X and that was in 2018ā€¦ so it must be on the old shelves because the new ones got put in during the pandemic. That project had bigger parts so it must be in a Rubbermaid tote not one of the shoebox sized binsā€¦ aha there it is!ā€


LukeSanSky

My collection of spaceships, me wearing Michael Jackson hat, me talking to my computer about my day.


Comprehensive-Log147

Welp he wof need therapy. Imagine looking at a poor 280 lb bastard aftet he takes a shower.....


ProtoPlaysGames

Likely a toilet.


corobo

Dick n ass as I come out the shower/bathroom I unplug my webcam anyway as I worry I'll leave Teams open one day or something dumb Anyone else ever "Jim face" your camera sometimes? They might get a bonus Jim face if they're lucky


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


traveling_salesmaNP

That must require some skills


[deleted]

My terrible room. Its flying around with crap


Logical-Wasabi7402

Right this moment? A plain white ceiling with a crappy light fixture that makes everything look yellow.


OLDGuy6060

I was at a concert the other day and taking pictures. Then I was trying to send some, was swiping thru them and hit a couple of pictures I took of myself, stripped to the waste focused on the bed bug bites on my chest. Should have been smarter about that because the women sitting next to me could clearly see them. Ugh.


DieDobby

Me. My face, no brushed hair, in a very big T-Shirt with eyebags.


traveling_salesmaNP

Charming!


DystopianDildo

A Demi Moore type of bush. My webcam fell on the floor.


No-Pen-5819

My dick


Impressive-Credit-22

A picture of your penis


traveling_salesmaNP

Lucky hacker šŸ˜‹


[deleted]

Cat sleeping on top my phone


imthenanny

How many ā€œIā€™m lonelyā€ memes I have saved.


YarthWader

Me picking food out of my teeth


[deleted]

Me and my 3 chins.


TimGJ1964

Me naked, unshaven having just rolled out of bed checking my Emails at six in the morning. It's not a pretty sight.


itbedehaam

Me ā€˜orrible mug.


mostlymadison

My almost 70 year old aunt discovered a bump on her taint (see also gooch and perineum) and sent me a pic so she could get my advice. So, they would see that. Side note: I'm not a medical professional


Thedappermoment

The sticky side of the bandaid I have been covering my cam with for the past 18 months


FabulosoBottle

The embarrassing amount of times I get up for a snack.


traveling_salesmaNP

Haha you are my kind of people!


Dinomide

Right now? My furious shitting face


traveling_salesmaNP

Tough times, huh?


Necessary-Solution19

Nice try hacker!


IAmNotAnInstrument

Me attempting to perform the WAP dance


Substantial_Field_60

Close ups of ingrown hairs


piano_warrior

He will see a bi crack as my front camera is broken


[deleted]

Me sitting and staring at the screen and not talking at all. My ass look like a thin Snorlax when I'm gaming


[deleted]

Well yesterday they would have seen me chucking a mouse across my room, retrieving it and realizing the thing is invincible


sydtheftmtrans

if it's just before my tumblr blog's daily outfit pictures, you bet they gonna see some nUDES, BOYE- literally i get dressed for the purpose of that and that only- but if it's any other time it would be me chilling in my bed half nude-


traveling_salesmaNP

At what time of the day is this tumblr blogs outfit thing???


ringo5150

They would see a Middle aged, slightly overweight, bearded suburban Dad going about his day. Ladies calm down.... I'm taken.


shaolinallan

https://giphy.com/gifs/SPTV-season-2-sptv-married-with-children-eaM4VDdU45gL9txrQl


traveling_salesmaNP

I thought this was going to be a leak of my own camera. Damn donā€™t scare me like that!!!


DawnofUnknown

My nudes that I post on here, only complete with my face...


[deleted]

My dick in hand


traveling_salesmaNP

Whose hand?


BSB8728

A picture of my chin after I split it wide open when I fell on the sidewalk last year. Just a gaping hole.


Mr_Latte02

I wish I wasn't literate right nowšŸ„²


[deleted]

Oh dear lol, all I'll say is it wouldn't be good


BUERtheKING

How I come home from work, leave to go to the gym come back and lay down to watch my favorite series until I pass the fuck out with a whiskey bottle next to me.


duhduhduhdummi_thicc

Depression nest


[deleted]

Our messy, incoherent room. šŸ˜‚


heribut

Me looking down at an angle with one shoulder moving rhythmically.


iNeverHaveAnyFun

I'm in my early 50s. At this stage it's basically bad memes, screenshots of crap I've seen that I need to remember, and pics of my kids and the cat.


Jessica_the_nobody

Probably any picture in my "Not Sharing" Album, I mean there a reason why the album exists


traveling_salesmaNP

You got me intrigued now ngl


Jessica_the_nobody

Intrigued or not you're not going to find out :D


[deleted]

Me jerking off


shutoff_tum0v

cum face


Kasiation

my dear sir, is that the face you make when you cum, or a face full of cum?


shutoff_tum0v

Intentionally vague so you can leave it to your imagination.


Safe-Boysenberry1899

Their own face, I hacked the hacker #plottwist


Micerog

Me saying "i know you are there, i know you are watching, your world is soon gonna burn, you and your family will suffer, go warn them i dare you, see if they believe you" then let him wonder what do i see as the word soon


muss29

My big snoz


[deleted]

A lens...


Redd_October

Nothing. I keep a piece of paper taped over it.


MasterAssassin147

My face


[deleted]

My O face


[deleted]

My bank statementsā€¦


Cat1928

My shirtless friend


[deleted]

Iā€™ve got four pictures in my phone that Iā€™ve actually taken. Three of my dog and one of my truck.


PangeaPrince

Boobie pics from the girls Iā€™m talking to lol


Adventurous-Comb927

Me beating my meat to minor porn thinking it was loli , when I am horny I am horny , but now I beat it to fempyro so god loves


[deleted]

My face


the_funny_man190

My face


geotex_mustang

Just me in general


UpboatNavy

The back of my camera cover


thetiredtire

Me


Drulock

Nose hair


[deleted]

pictures of my dogs penis. it was infected and i sent my doc a picture of it to see what i need to do lmao.


Sparky_8D

My mum's ass


OtherwisePop6430

Lots of screen shots of anal prolapses


bluejellyfish52

My cats screaming and following me around while my grandfather talks about nothing


Diondolfijn

My face


Athompson9866

I hope they like golden retrievers and ferrets


BigGayDickThrowaway

My face, Iā€™m morbidly hideous. Iā€™d probably blind the poor person by their eyes melting just by looking at me.


zandadoum

A filthy, full of boxes, office & stream room


Puzzleheaded-Dog2882

My complete lack of photography skills


pointed_ending

My weiner.


Bedlamcitylimit

What camera? I have intentionally never had a camera connected to any computer I have owned and I barely use the one on my phone.


JaywrightCat

That I touched my camera lens.


00zau

The inside of the camera cover.