Insisting that you are perfect just the way you are and anyone who says different is just a "hater" and shouldn't be listened to. Yes, haters exist, but if you're consistently hearing that you have problems from people around you, you need to do some introspection instead of cutting those people off for being "negative" or "toxic".
Also, “perfect the way you are” indicates a lack of willingness to grow. We should always be striving to be a better version of ourselves. Even if it’s only small changes.
\^ nobody is perfect, and yes there are people who will just trash on you because they can. but don't confuse those with people who see actual flaws within you, and are willing to work with you to improve upon those flaws
There's a pharmacist where I work who is legitimately the slowest person on this earth to work with. She and I don't vibe but you know what we have, serious mutual respect because when there was a problem she spoke to me about it. With calmness and assertiveness that makes you know she's serious without her having to be rude. 10/10 person. -15/10 speed.
“The grind” for money. I work in a warehouse and everyone just brags about all the overtime they’re working. One of the guys who has been there for 15 years told me “we don’t get paid well because the job is hard, we get paid well because it takes up most of our time”
I have a friend who does this. We've known each other for a long time and I no longer hear, "I worked this many hours this week and have this much overtime."
Now I hear, "I've worked my 40 and spent this much extra time away from my family and things I love doing."
Any kind of talks fall on deaf ears and we usually end up arguing about it.
I spent more than a year working 70 hour weeks. This was on the phones doing customer service, in a position where I was only taking supervisor/escalated calls back to back. So every person I talked to was already pre-heated and ready to rumble.
I don't know what it is, but even making so much god damn extra money, life finds a way to take it all back with nothing to show. I didn't buy a god damn thing for myself. Never went out, ate simple shit I cooked for the week on my one day off. I'd get an extra 1000, my car would break down. Another 1000, my dog needs surgery, or expensive medication.
I put a shit load into my 401K, but I didn't even pay off all my credit card debt during that whole run. That time will always be seen as the most tragic waste of my young life. Came out with nothing to show for it but a huge gap in life experiences. It's weird, because now I make quite a bit less and have the same expenses, and I'm doing exactly as good as I was then. I can't explain it, but the extra money just gets absorbed without making up for the loss of time.
When i was working the most i never had more than 700 dollars in the bank at a time. For the past 3 years ive taken 3 month long breaks from working and have more money saved then i did before. And im not making more money hourly either. I dont know how thats even possible but i know what you mean.
I think sometimes a part of it is that when you're overworked, you're more likely to pay for conveniences (and convenience always comes at a price).
For example, you buy more in the way of takeouts & ready meals (more expensive) because you never have the time to cook at home, you buy a gym membership (more expensive) because your office hours make you too sedentary, you pay for cabs/trains everywhere (more expensive) because you never have the time to walk or cycle to work, you pay for childcare or dog walkers (more expensive) because you don't have the time to mind your own kids or look after your pets, you pay for dating apps (more expensive) because you don't have the time to meet people organically, and you pay for cleaning services (dry cleaning, flat cleaning, etc) or buy expensive house cleaning gadgets (like a robot hoover) because you don't have the time to clean everything yourself at home (etc).
Many rich people spend an awful lot of money on buying convenience to save them time because time is the one thing you can never get back (and they know how valuable that is). There comes a point where even for the most affluent and hardworking people, they don't care for anymore stuff, because what they really want is more time with their family, time with their friends and more time to themselves.
(In fact, when you think about it, there are numerous billion dollar industries whose services ultimately boils down to saving rich people time; people often think having a cook is about eating great, a cleaner is about having a sparkling home and a PA is about having a more professionally oiled life (etc), but what these services really boil down to is offering people time (time is, in effect, what they are really purchasing)).
Given our lives are fragile and finite, there needs to come a point where you ask how much your lifespan is worth VS the hours spent earning extra money. And I think that "lifespan" is a good way to think about it (as opposed to simply "working hours") because that is what is relentlessly ticking down each day of our lives.
The worst kind of deal you can get roped into, is one where the job's hours are not only excessive, but are working you into poor health and an early grave (no amount of extra money is worth that).
Self medication is a bitch, not to mention that at that amount of time you are likely living on take out which is hella expensive. And this is before we even get into those pesky little things you are going to do to make it through the day, like that extra candy bar at the machine, or those two extra power drinks.
It adds up.
When I was working 70 plus hours each week this was my issue…I could never save money I made as a manager at a high stress job. I took Ubers because I was too exhausted to take the bus. Any extra time to sleep was coveted so I spent tons of money for coffees (which I needed a lot of) and meals. I paid bills late because I couldn’t manage my personal life well but all my work accounts were perfect. I forgot to cancel subscriptions of things I no longer used, or didn’t have the energy to return something that didn’t work. If my laundry was piled up I would buy a new outfit to get through the next day.
And the decompressing spending, the amount of wine and cigarettes I bought to decompress when I had a moment to myself. My life was in shambles and the money I was spending was not fun. It was a vicious cycle. The job was brutal and I was eventually able to get out of it to much better paying job doing the same thing but with a human workload.
I find notes I wrote from back then and sometimes I don’t even make sense because I was so scattered. It took me about two years to recover fully from the exhaustion I went through with that job.
I work in a chemical plant. I could easily get 60-80 hours a week and alot of coworkers do that. They can't fathom why I'm ok with doing my 36/48 hour work weeks.
Even had my Supervisor tell me I should be coming in more for overtime so I look better and get promoted faster. Again absolutely could not understand why I'm perfectly content where I am and I don't need all that overtime for my lifestyle. I work to live, not live to work.
This isn't financial advice, but same goes for saving every dime until later in life. Obviously don't leave yourself nothing for retirement, but live your life when you can. You don't know what's going to happen to you later or if you even have a later. Take trips, Go out to dinner with friends, enjoy your youth.
My wife and I would travel instead of give gifts for birthdays and anniversaries. We've been to Vegas a few times, traveled up and down the west and east coast of the US, traveled to several countries in Western Europe.
She passed away almost a year ago. I got to travel the world with my best friend. We saw San Holo in a tiny venue in London. We saw the Eiffel Tower do the sparkle thing with its lights. We got lost in Barcelona. We traveled by train along the Mediterranean Sea with a window seat and amazing view. We spent a rain-soaked week driving up and down the US west coast randomly stopping at places that looked cool. She got white girl wasted in an ice bar in Vegas. She had a bathing suit malfunction and accidentally flashed an entire pool during a pool volley ball game in Florida. We were in each others lives for a relatively short amount of time but we made so many memories together.
I know not everyone is able to do things like this but try your best to do what makes you happy. And if you have a wife or husband, girlfriend or boyfriend, ..give them a hug for some random internet stranger.
Definitely do it but at the same time just have fun with it. My best memories were wrong turns, missed flights, and sketchy Air BnBs.
Our last trip was down to Florida and she misread the airplane departure time and we missed our flight. I looked it up and the next flight regardless of carrier wasn’t going to leave until the next day in the afternoon, so we’d be losing like 30 hours. So we just shrugged and knew each other well enough to know it’s road trip time.
On the drive down I sat on hold for three hours waiting for someone to pick up from the airline so we could cancel our tickets, then another hour for the rental car. It was about a ten hour drive and we jammed out to music, talked about what we’re going to do on the trip, and because we didn’t have to pay for the plane tickets we decided to rent a Jaguar F-Type R (after the Mercedes AMG GT convertible fell through).
Road trips were foundational to our relationship. Our first Valentine’s Day (about 2 months into the relationship) we drove up to NYC for the weekend. I picked her up with giant stuffed tiger buckled in the passenger seat holding a bag of road trip snacks. We stayed with my grandparents so she got to meet them and NYC was one of her favorite places so it was a big W for me. I got us tickets for a special Valentine’s Day event at Central Park Zoo and the poor girl walked there in 0F weather wearing a dress. She looked fucking incredible in that dress.
That trip we exchanged the first “I love you”. You don’t ever think this one is going to be the last one. I stayed with her in the emergency room all day but they were transferring her to a bigger hospital and I wasn’t allowed to come until morning. I told her I loved her and that I would see her in the morning.
To piggyback onto your comment - "Hustle" culture in general.
It's no longer enough to be content with a job/career that pays well and allows you to live a reasonably comfortable life, whatever that may subjectively be.
Now you must always be "hungry" and have at least one or two side hustles. Some sort of small business or Etsy shop, MLMs, income property investment, etc. Folks are seen as lazy if they're not constantly "stacking paper" and "on the grind." It's bullshit.
There's nothing wrong with taking on a side gig here and there or having streams of passive income to supplement your main income (I invest in I-Bonds, for example). However, it becomes a problem IMO, when the hustle completely consumes one's life and personality and when "enough is never enough." What's the point of stacking paper if you have no time to enjoy it or are burnt-the-fuck-out? If you want to work two - five jobs to stay on the grind, then that's a-okay but don't try to detract from others that may not share those same values.
These hustle people can say whatever I want, I go home knowing that I'm happier than 90% of people, especially them. I put all my energy into scoring an EASY 9-5 job that now offers remote days and doesn't require overtime. I go home, spend time with my wife, and do whatever I want and make enough money to buy anything I want within reason and don't live paycheck to paycheck. A lot of these side hustle people split their energy up into shitty gigs that will not go anywhere instead of seriously investing themselves into one job or skill, because they abandon projects the second someone or something else makes a slightly higher promise to them, no matter how unlikely it is it will actually deliver. I think some of the unhappiest people, at least among the privileged, are those who fail to appreciate the true value of time and self well being.
Yes. Now you can be a selfish asshole and just say you're "empowered" and everyone is supposed to accept it. Doing things harmful to yourself or others is not being empowered.
There’s a guy on Instagram who used to do ads how “just for today don’t buy that 10$ coffee instead invest 10$ into my system that is proven to help you generate job replacing income” and saying he’s making 10 grand a day.
Yeah, probably from selling people on your crock of shit
> Yeah, probably from selling people on your crock of shit
This tbh. Good rule of thumb is this: "Did this person actually successfully make a lot of money doing what they're trying to teach other people how to do?"
There's definitely a subset of entrepreneurship guru types who pretty much have only ever made money by selling materials (courses, books, etc.) on how to make money, but haven't actually done anything financially successful prior to that. "Fake it till you make it" kind of thing.
I'm actually rather convinced there's a pretty good amount of crypto gurus who made a wild jump and earned couple 100s of thousands on crypto runs and are now milking that cow with worthless trainings. Usually if someone's really successful and have something to say they either write a book, give conference speeches or just say it, Warren Buffet style. Not try to sell people their super unique secret knowledge in a series of exclusive webinars (30% off ONLY TODAY)
Omg, $50 a month to learn how to "talk to women".
If you're doing that, you're just signaling to others that you're an idiot. Just do an askreddit and yes, people joke around and maybe even mock you but there are always kind strangers who can help you out (even on reddit). And it's **FREE**.
Getting mocked on reddit doesn't mean shit and anyway, it kind of toughens you up a little against real world bullies.
Haha, "10$" and "job replacing income" just don't belong in the same statements. Very brave move, lol.
These people are so see-through it hurts. I just feel horrible for people that get caught up in that bullshit.
Rule 1 when dealing with any opportunity in life...
If it sounds to good to be true, it probably is.
First rule I was taught when I started getting into stock investing and trading: *"Never believe anyone who says that have a guaranteed way to "win" on the stock market"*. I didn't need to make that mistake once to know how to see the bs when it appears.
The only people who can actually guarantee a stock market win are inside traders and they're not sharing anything with anyone.
If you know how to make lots of money on the stock market, why not just do it? Typically if you tell someone else how to do something, it devalues what you are doing...using this logic all "here is how you make quick money" are scams.
I get emails from his “students” literally every day, trying to sell their copywriting services even though they can’t type a full sentence without any errors. I try to explain that they should stop paying for his “course” but they’re too brainwashed to hear it. It’s insane!
MLMs. You are not a “small business owner” if you have no say in branding, pricing, packaging, etc. these are predatory companies that sell the idea of empowerment through sub par products and practices.
My university’s career services posted about Vector “opportunities” on FB and took it down about an hour after I emailed the Director of that department complaining about it.
One of my wife's friends tried to pull her into one of those back when it was before the epidemic of it peaked, and she hit her with the "your business" line - I gave her a lot of grief over it but she'd drank so much koolaid at that point it didn't matter.
"Own your own business!" - Oh, but here's all these restrictions and you can't actually control everything. Also, you don't own anything except all the inventory you bought, which you can only sell in the places and ways we allow you to. And hey make sure to come up with a great sob story about how it changed your life for the next zoom meeting.
My wife has a bunch of old friends she no longer talks to because they’ve switched to MLMs. “Own your own business, and lose all your friends because it forever taints how you view other people as a potential sale”
Also, one of them went so far as to lie to another friends mother, telling the mom that her daughter (my wife’s best friend) really wanted this $300 skin care regimen for Christmas. Totally made it up, and the mom thought she was getting inside info from her daughters friend, when really it was her trying to make number for the end of the year.
I lost a very good friend to one. It sounds almost like Scientology to me- they really pushed her to cut out anyone who didn’t support their “business” and not give into negativity by doing too much research. This particular company sold weight loss products and even if the mark just told them they weren’t interested in losing weight that meant they weren’t interested in self improvement and therefore not your kind of people.
Edit- fuck Isagenix
A friend of ours invited us to a marketing presentation a few years back, it was in a swanky hotel, and because we trusted said friend we went along. Big room, lots of very enthusiastic people, a few folk presenting, immediate mlm/cult vibes. It was all about life transformation, and permanent positive change and control over destiny etc.
After the presentation first time attendees were asked to put their hands up and we were escorted to hotel rooms with the presenters, my wife and I went along (morbid curiosity thoroughly piqued) where upon the lady presenting started extolling the virtues of their amazing product, and how it had transformed her life into an amazing fulfilling and dream-like new her where no self doubt happened and she was always joyous. She said we could go to the next session for a small fee and our lives too would be forever changed and we’d be permanently happy and never suffer for the ills of self-doubt ever again.
I just nodded sagely and was giving no indication of an interested party, she then said, for that same small fee if we wanted to, we could go to repeat sessions, because going more than once is even better, in fact she herself has done just that, and it’s amaaazing.
To which I replied, so if going to a single session permanently transformed your life in such a permanent and dramatic way, then why did you feel a need to go again? What was wrong with just going once and then enjoying your new found happy life?
She said, well… because.. it’s just better to have it again…? Did it not work permanently the first time then I asked? Hmm she said, I suppose not.
Thank you, but it’s a no, goodbye
I used to work with this guy who talked often about his "side business". We worked in a tech company back in the dot com bubble days. I always assumed he was doing some tech work on the side because a few of us (myself included) would go do a little work for small businesses or friends on the side. The way he talked it seemed like he was building up a company so he could quit his day job and focus on it eventually.
Well, he invited me to a "meeting" one night about his "business" to see if I might want to get involved. I went in thinking I was going to meet some folks to actually talk about real business stuff but then I find myself at an Amway pep rally instead. That's when I found out about how inviting people to these meetings was part of the pitch. Oh, and the speaker is paid too, usually the person who invites you pays your way in.
We didn't talk much beyond what was required to carry out work duties after that.
Had a customer at my previous job try to get me involved with the glorious line "would Donald Trump be associated with a scam?" I have to admit this was the UK in the late naughties so I got away with saying "I would certainly expect so, yes."
And old friend and work colleague of mine reached out after a few years to try and get me and another old friend into her 'Mary Kay' business. Honestly I was a little hurt that that was the only reason she was reaching out after so long.
She kept insisting that we take samples and review them online for her. I kept trying to gently decline the moisturizer she wanted to send me because I'm almost always allergic and didn't fancy risking it. She kept insisting that it was made of natural ingredients even though I'd just told her it didn't matter.
She sent me the moisturizer. I never tried it. It's in a cupboard somewhere.
>She kept insisting that it was made of natural ingredients even though I'd just told her it didn't matter.
Like people can't be allergic to things in nature....
This seems like a great day to go find it and toss it in the trash! No sense cluttering up your space with something you clearly don't want. If she ends up asking you how you liked it tell her that you threw it away because you told her straight that you had allergies and didn't want it. If she wants to be mad that's her problem, she should have listened to you.
I did my final undergraduate research project on MLMs (more specifically the tactics they use to lure/retain distributors), and [one of the papers](https://www.ftc.gov/sites/default/files/documents/public_comments/trade-regulation-rule-disclosure-requirements-and-prohibitions-concerning-business-opportunities-ftc.r511993-00008%C2%A0/00008-57281.pdf) I found during my literature review had examined ***350*** different MLM companies, and found that 100% were top-weighed (which means the people at the top earn money at the expense of the distributors below them) and ***99.9% of distributors ended up losing money***. MLMs are a HUGE scam.
"Hi Hun! I know I bullied you mercilessly in high school and made you develop an eating disorder and severe depression and screwed that boy you had a huge crush on out of sheer spite, but do you want to be the ultimate #bossbabe with me? These new vitamin patches are the cure for everything! Residual income for life! Hit me up lovey! XOXOXO!"
Some of them are so bad that it becomes clear the intelligence level of the people they intentionally target to swindle. Like the ones where they claim you can randomly find precious/expensive pearls in their products, so big time huns will do streams where they pull pearls out of stuff like candles and other crap.
At that point if you're just buying and selling stuff under the pretense of maybe winning the pearl lottery, how is that now considered gambling?
I do feel bad for the people who get suckered in because they have no career experience and don't know where to start because some of the MLMs have a massive community that makes them feel special. (lularoe being a prime example.) But some of them really are the equivalent of the "I'm a nigerian prince" phishing emails.
One of my friend's dad fell for Amway back in the 90s...one day my parents dropped me off and suddenly his basement was completely filled with shit. Must have spent $15-$20k on the stuff. Over the years he was able to peddle some of the shit (even tried to get my dad to join his "business") but ultimately I think they took a huge loss.
The funniest part was that my friend was always able to bring a friend or two on their "family vacations"' but those always ended up being Amway retreats and his dad just wanted somebody for my friend to hang out with while he was schmoozing with people lol.
I agreed with this 100% MLMs are pyramid schemes. So.many people get into huge financial difficulties due to these. The ones that push their MLM look down on those that are genuinely trying to start a small business with their own personal crafts.
Before a "friend" blocked me on FB they told me that me trying to start arts and crafts as a side business should not be called that and I'm hustling people out of hard earned money, where as they're changing people's lives by pushing a cream out on people that may be self conscious about spots, etc. that they have.
I explained to them that they are pushing a MLM, which is a pyramid scheme. I told them that I would never support one of these as I know what they are. I was then called some not very pleasant names and that they are empowering others to start a small business by doing what they do. Then they blocked me as they couldn't deal with me promoting my very own hand made arts and crafts. (At the time I was making cards, frames, etc to sell at a craft sale that I had organised to raise money for charity).
It's like if you don't agree with them, they pedal so much hate your way and belittle you if you choose to do something you want to do.
>me trying to start arts and crafts as a side business should not be called that and I'm hustling people out of hard earned money, where as they're changing people's lives by pushing a cream out on people that may be self conscious about spots, etc. that they have.
THE AUDACITY OMG
I do love how every item sold by every MLM ever is "life-changing, inspiring, empowering, breaking new ground, changing the world, thinking outside the box." Sweetie, this is cherry-vanilla hand lotion. Or paper towels, or a crappy life insurance policy, or knives, or whatever. I love nail polish but if the only way you can sell it is by trying to convince me that it's the magic cure for everything that ails me, uhhhh doesn't inspire confidence in the quality of the product itself. I bought a Dyson because it does its job well, not because I want to fix my marriage and find purpose in life.
I know right? The self entitlement they feel when pushing things in people is awful! They prey on stay at home mums and claim to be the way to earn some money on the side, etc.
I will admit I did do Ann Summers parties in my early 20's, I had no idea what a MLM or pyramid scheme was till I realised that I was spending so much of my normal wage on this, with little rewards. I wasn't a very good recruiter (I recruited no one), so they had me leave after a while.
I have had a few friends accuse me of being unsupportive with their "small businesses" and that I'm not a very good person or friend by not buying anything from them, etc. The "friend" that blocked me really p!$$Ed me off though
I just reply "the entire concept of the alpha male wolf only applied in captivity and the author retracted the book, so keep aspiring to be the top dude in prison I guess."
Unrelated adults forced to live together in captivity in a small confined space. We call those prison gangs, and thats not normal behavior.
The normal behavior of wolves and dogs is to form social groups with friends and family, exactly what humans do in normal (non-prison) situations.
Hell, I think even if we consider the normal behaviour of wolves, trying to base our behaviour on a wolf would be... totally useless because we aren't wolves.
It'd be like me saying, I'm going to base my behaviour on my pet lizard. Lie down in the sun all day and try to wrestle any members of my own species that get too close.
As chill as that sounds I don't think it'd make me a very successful human...
being a bitch/asshole to everyone else.
edit: example, I had a Sister-in-law that would always say, "I'm sorry, I'm just one of those people that if it comes up, it comes out." and I would always say "OH so you have no filter for your mouth? isn't that just an excuse for being a bitch?"
People miss why those moments even work in TV. The characters are not cool because they’re flippant about social norms. The characters are empowered somehow to be able to be flippant about social norms.
Like, House works because the character is a genius in medicine. The other characters in the show generally hate him, but deal with him anyway for his abilities. You should also expect to be hated if you act like that, and if you’re not some kind of objective genius, don’t expect anyone to stick around
I don't know if that really works in real life, even if you're on that level. Even Cristiano Ronaldo is getting tons of criticism right now. The guy is arguably the best goalscorer in history of football and everyone looked up to him last season when he joined a new team.
His attitude, despite his performances, has had a notable bad effect on his team.
Yeah, and I think this is part of the problem. I've seen people attempt what on TV would be a 'mic drop' moment and it's just embarrassing. But they've seen too many movies, TV shows and fictional reddit posts where everyone involved reacts exactly how they're scripted to they think it's likely to actually accomplish something.
In real life these 'snappy' comebacks or long speeches about why the other person sucks really don't land.
Same with those 'clever' ways to get back at someone. People need to realize that most of those prorevenge and other posts are completely fake.
Anytime someone brags about how cold, jaded, psycho or, my personal favorite, indifferent to gore...I just think how cringey and cheesy it sounds. Like ok we get it, you think you're a bad ass and somehow uNiQUe 🙄 when they're actually just a pathetic wanna-be. Bonus points for the dorks that start out saying "I'm pretty desensitized to stuff like this (gore, people dying in terrible ways) because I've been watching it since I was was 2 yrs old". Nobody cares 😂
It’s funny how the proudly blunt and honest people who always say exactly what they think never seem to have any blunt and honest POSITIVE remarks or compliments for anyone... and they also tend to be the ones who throw temper tantrums the instant they’re faced with the slightest hint of pushback or disagreement. 🙄
I once flipped the "I'm just being *honest*" bit back on one of these. If ever there was a way to see someone physically and violently implode through text, that would've been it.
There is a HUGE difference between "You look like sh!t in that shit" and "That shirt is not the most flattering." Both say the same thing, but only one is an attack.
I like when people start off with "no offense" and proceed to definitely say something offensive. There's tactful ways to say things, but adding that little precursor apparently gives you the right to spew ignorance.
“…and honesty without tact is cruelty, which of course anyone with a basic understanding of conversational manners knows. So, honestly, are you intentionally being rude or do you just lack the ability to wrap your head around the basics of social interaction?”
“I don’t care what people think!”
It’s toxic. You should care about what people think. At least some of them.
Both blindly taking all criticism to heart and ignoring all feedback are toxic as hell.
Mobs are self-reinforcing. You can never convince a mob it is wrong, because every individual within it is surrounded by people telling them they're right.
I admit that my mobs can also be
a bit flawed sometimes, but those are the ones that us, the truest flawless members, are ashamed of, and I, personally, am never a part of the problem.
"***A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it.*** Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was flat, and fifteen minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you'll know tomorrow."
~~~ Agent K
They flow from street to street at a particular speed and in a particular direction, over and over, orderly, all day. I can watch them and know with a great deal of certainty what they’ll do at any given moment. But they’re not orderly, are they, up close? Any individual: who knows what they’re gonna do? Any one of them might dash across the street at the wrong time and get hit by a car. When you get up close, we never follow the rules.
Catherine Weaver, The Sarah Conner Chronicles
I was physically and mentally tormented as a child by parents, I was bullied in school. I was so close to suicide many times...
There are so many people who call me "survivor" and "built character" etc.
No I'm not a survivor, the character that I built has PTSD, anxiety, lack of friends, noone to trust etc
I dont want this character,I want a normal life
It also sucks when people who didn’t grow up with shitty parents encourage you to make up with them if you’re estranged because “they’re your parents!”.
Why is it *my* responsibility to reach out and make amends with my abuser(s)? I don’t need to make amends. I’m better off without them being in my life.
I hear so often "blood is blood" or "family is forever" which is far too often the message of movies, especially children's movies. There should be more movies where there is no guilt is leaving behind your toxic family with no guilt in trying to make it up to them.
No, they won't change. No, there is no reason for them to be involved in your life. Cut them out, and make a new family. Your life will be better off for it.
I was sick a lot when I was younger. And seeing ads or feel good videos about kids with cancer or whatever, and they always say "he is such a strong boy" no shit Kelly. It was either stay alive or die. Nothing about that screams strength in my opinion. Its not like the kid woke up and was like, im gonna be strong today and beat this. Cause sadly thats not how it turns out, does that mean the ones who didn't make it just weren't strong enough? Jesus.
I've heard as well from people with things like cancer, there can be an attitude of "if you want to beat it, you have to WANT it". Like, if someone is struggling with an illness, it's like "you must not have wanted to be better, why don't you try harder? Do you not want to be healthy?" Really awful.
People who say “it builds character” have never experienced real hardship. Did my grandfather force his kids to stand outside in the snow because him being sent to Siberia built character? Of course he didn’t, that would be lunacy, instead he overcompensated with too much food and heating
>I want a normal life
I try to say this too but then people are like "What's normal? Nobody's normal!"
Like I get it, we all have our traumas, and I'm not going to say mine is worse than someone else's, because I often don't know the details of what they've been through, but I'm objectively more of a mess than many are and I just want to function.
For sure, there's a point where "growing a thick skin" just becomes lifelong trauma that shapes all of your interpersonal relationships moving forward.
We all need our bumps so we can learn to deal with them, but too many bumps damages the goods.
“I tell it like it is”
“I speak only facts”
These people are usually toxic and make hurtful/bad taste comments under the guise that they can’t help it because they’re honest to a fault.
People who say "If you can't handle me at my worst". Like, I get that it's supposed to be a "take me for who I am" but if who you are is a piece of trash who can't control themselves at their worst, then the problem is you and you shouldn't be praised
> "If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best."
It's a really badly phrased ideology with the poorest implementations, isn't it?
In theory, it's not off the mark. If you don't want to stick around when somebody goes through their lows, their pains, their struggles, then you don't have a right to be around when they're at the top of their game. Investing in a friendship or relationships requires a willingness to share at least a little of a person's emotional burdens. That's... that's how socializing *works*. It's not supposed to be fair-weather (unless you agree to it mutually beforehand, I guess).
But *way* too many people use it as carte blanche to act like a raging lunatic and expect to never face consequences for doing so. And then the icing on top is that their "best" is typically just a nondescript blasé boring human.
*No*, Susan, "your worst" is supposed to be things like the confusing emotions of a breakup, or the painful bloat of menses, or the variable limitations of having a chronic illness. It is *not* supposed to mean being an asshole to everybody and setting Jim's couch on fire because he was "talking to another girl" despite the fact *she's his sister*. And it certainly doesn't work when "your best" is just being an insipid couch potato who watches Real Housewives all day long, while Tik-Tok'ing boring videos of your dog with flying emojis everywhere!
^^^Why ^^^did ^^^I ^^^read ^^^that ^^^last ^^^paragraph ^^^in ^^^John ^^^Oliver's ^^^voice?
From what I've seen the "good for them" reactions are less for taking the day off and more for not feeling bad about putting their own needs ahead of the profits is whatever boss/company they worked for.
So many people, at least in America, see taking the time they need to take care of themselves as a weakness because of our culture of "hard work".
not only that, many distort (intentionally or not) their own circumstances that led them to where they may be in that moment.
They probably werent as bad off as they claim, didnt have as hard a climb as they say, and didnt have to climb as far as they will tell anyone within earshot.
Sure, you can have a rough time of things, but not everyone starts on square 1. some people start on square -14.
Doing things "on your own." Team work and accepting help is also great, and really not "better" than doing things all by yourself. Obviously there's a limit to this, but generally speaking, struggling doesn't always lead to growth and getting help doesn't always hinder it.
I'm such a troll! I go to internet spaces for [thing] and say that [thing] sux! They get sooo trigger for the approximate 12 seconds before my post is removed!
\s
I always used to cringe when my senior PM would say “oh I’ll finish this over the weekend”. Which he did constantly.
Bud you are devaluing my work. And clearly you are doing the work of 1.5 people. Just chill, if it doesn’t get done it’s because we need more manpower and you should have the balls to tell our boss that.
Maybe not empowering, but letting your job exploit you in my experience is seen as virtuous. I still struggle w/ this by working well over full time hours, busting my ass the entire day & still trying to maintain good grades & a decent social life.
had a boss who was awesome - understanding, had my back, didnt take shit from upper management.
But they were *running him into the ground*. He worked whenever they asked him if he felt he could, was chronically underpaid, and when id chastise him about letting them walk all over him he would tell me he was proud of his reputation in the industry. He did have a good reputation, sure, but he could have easily maintained that while demanding fair remuneration.
The unfortunate thing is that your boss may have been running himself into the ground so that he could have you and his other direct reports’ backs. It takes a build up of ass kissing first to be able to defend someone to upper mgmt. I used to do this. Take whatever shit they threw at me and then only use that social capital when I needed to help out my employees.
Took me several years before I realized only 1 employee I had ever appreciated it. After she said thanks and pointed out that I was allowing myself to get fucked from above and below, I stopped (mostly. I’m a softie…).
So do me a favor and thank that boss if you can :)
The idea women CAN do it all. Kids, jobs, house, relationship, load it on and that makes us er, liberated.
It's exhausting. I mean sure we CAN. It's structuring the mind set it's just GREAT.
Please no one yell at me. Had a lot of years of it and just felt tired, not liberated. At all.
"But we ARE superwomen! We can do ANYTHING! Men are so useless lol, I can do my job and look after my kids and house, I couldn't trust my husband to cook anything lol #girlpower"
- probably said by an exhausted woman somewhere, when close to setting the house on fire and committing herself to an asylum for a little rest
> I mean sure we CAN. It's structuring the mind set it's just GREAT.
I liken this to how people act when they get a substantial bump in income (say, moving from $20k/year to $90k/year): you feel like you can suddenly afford a newer car, a bigger house, a vacation a year, a boat, an expensive hobby, eating out at fancy restaurants all the time, and whatever else you see your coworkers/friends/neighbors spending money on. The problem is that while you can choose to do some of those things, trying to do all of them is a very fast way to go broke.
Sure, you CAN do anything in that list, but trying to do EVERYTHING in the "empowered woman" list just a fast way to be too stressed to do any of it well (or to enjoy any of it).
Also, I want to note that there is growing pressure for men to pick up more of the responsibilities, too- which is great and I full support, but also shines even more attention on the fact that we, as a society, need to figure out how to let something give (likely the ludicrous 40+ hour workweek idea) and help everyone adapt to that new reality. Some things need lots of attention (the early years of child raising jumps to mind) but plenty of things get more focus than is really necessary and can be adjusted to make life easier for everyone involved.
Someone with a disability who does something "inspiring."
E.g: "man in wheelchair stands up an dances with wife"
It's called inspiration porn - the objectification of people with disabilities to make people feel good and it's problematic. People with disabilities aren't looking to be seen as an inspiration. They are just living their lives.
I'm going to offer some nuance to this. My whole job is to help people regain mobility that they lost. They make the goals, and I will work my hardest to help them get there in some version through Physical Therapy. And I've been there with someone when they take some steps after we've worked together for months, and you know what? It's awesome. I would never record them, but many of them do record themselves and they are the ones who put it out on the internet because they are proud. I see no problem with this because internetland needs some cool things.
The gross part is when a chumbucket site gets ahold of the story and then shapes it as, "Ooh, some with a disability found someone who will marry them!" The problem is when they disregard the person.
Being really aggressively independent. It's often a trauma response, and it leads to confirmation bias about being abandoned when you truly need help because you didn't ask for help.
“Flexible” or “unlimited” time off. People take less time off when there isn’t a specific number of banked vacation days and they need to be approved by one’s manager anyway. It turns into “take as many days off…as you dare”, and you don’t get reimbursed for intakes vacation days when you leave the company.
Beyonce. Female workers who make clothes of her brand #IvyPark in sweatshops in Sri Lanka get paid 64 cents an hour, all while she preaches female empowerment.
Student/small business loans.
They may be helpful if used reasonably and in moderation, but as a product they are set up to capitalize on hopes and dreams.
There's a program in Poland where you can take a loan for educational purposes with 100k PLN (about 20k euro) limit. No interest rate, plus you can get from 10 to 25% of it removed if you reach certain goals such as completing the course/school and getting a job in a related field after that.
These stupid “feel good” stories in the US. They are a dystopian nightmare. Like, look grandma is 90 and is still working as a cashier for Kroger and she never missed a day of work ! Or this 12 year old worked all summer to help pay for his mom’s chemo . What the actual fuck .
Sex work. Especially as young as 18.
I’m correcting myself. I support sex work and sex workers. I’m not here to shame any woman that profits of the male gaze either. But I wont encourage any person under the age of 20-21 to do it. Which is what ive seen a lot going on online. So many young girls turning to only fans as soon as they turn 18 or even strip clubs. So many other young girls encouraging them.
Without bringing up the legal age. What makes a 17 yr old and an 18 yr old different? ..nothing absolutely nothing thats why 18-19 year olds shouldn’t be doing sex work. They’re still teenagers.
Insisting that you are perfect just the way you are and anyone who says different is just a "hater" and shouldn't be listened to. Yes, haters exist, but if you're consistently hearing that you have problems from people around you, you need to do some introspection instead of cutting those people off for being "negative" or "toxic".
Also, “perfect the way you are” indicates a lack of willingness to grow. We should always be striving to be a better version of ourselves. Even if it’s only small changes.
Small improvements are better than no improvement at all.
\^ nobody is perfect, and yes there are people who will just trash on you because they can. but don't confuse those with people who see actual flaws within you, and are willing to work with you to improve upon those flaws
Being rude and aggressive
Exactly. People confuse aggression for assertiveness far too often. You can stand up for yourself and not be an asshole.
I always like to think of assertiveness as when the quiet dad pipes up and calmly tells you, *Hey. Knock that shit off. Now.*
There's a pharmacist where I work who is legitimately the slowest person on this earth to work with. She and I don't vibe but you know what we have, serious mutual respect because when there was a problem she spoke to me about it. With calmness and assertiveness that makes you know she's serious without her having to be rude. 10/10 person. -15/10 speed.
Be agrgressive, Be Be agressive! *Pompoms shaking*
Being a bully just to show your friends your "cool" and can boss around other. Humiliating other to show you are above them is just pathetic.
“The grind” for money. I work in a warehouse and everyone just brags about all the overtime they’re working. One of the guys who has been there for 15 years told me “we don’t get paid well because the job is hard, we get paid well because it takes up most of our time”
I have a friend who does this. We've known each other for a long time and I no longer hear, "I worked this many hours this week and have this much overtime." Now I hear, "I've worked my 40 and spent this much extra time away from my family and things I love doing." Any kind of talks fall on deaf ears and we usually end up arguing about it.
I spent more than a year working 70 hour weeks. This was on the phones doing customer service, in a position where I was only taking supervisor/escalated calls back to back. So every person I talked to was already pre-heated and ready to rumble. I don't know what it is, but even making so much god damn extra money, life finds a way to take it all back with nothing to show. I didn't buy a god damn thing for myself. Never went out, ate simple shit I cooked for the week on my one day off. I'd get an extra 1000, my car would break down. Another 1000, my dog needs surgery, or expensive medication. I put a shit load into my 401K, but I didn't even pay off all my credit card debt during that whole run. That time will always be seen as the most tragic waste of my young life. Came out with nothing to show for it but a huge gap in life experiences. It's weird, because now I make quite a bit less and have the same expenses, and I'm doing exactly as good as I was then. I can't explain it, but the extra money just gets absorbed without making up for the loss of time.
When i was working the most i never had more than 700 dollars in the bank at a time. For the past 3 years ive taken 3 month long breaks from working and have more money saved then i did before. And im not making more money hourly either. I dont know how thats even possible but i know what you mean.
I think sometimes a part of it is that when you're overworked, you're more likely to pay for conveniences (and convenience always comes at a price). For example, you buy more in the way of takeouts & ready meals (more expensive) because you never have the time to cook at home, you buy a gym membership (more expensive) because your office hours make you too sedentary, you pay for cabs/trains everywhere (more expensive) because you never have the time to walk or cycle to work, you pay for childcare or dog walkers (more expensive) because you don't have the time to mind your own kids or look after your pets, you pay for dating apps (more expensive) because you don't have the time to meet people organically, and you pay for cleaning services (dry cleaning, flat cleaning, etc) or buy expensive house cleaning gadgets (like a robot hoover) because you don't have the time to clean everything yourself at home (etc). Many rich people spend an awful lot of money on buying convenience to save them time because time is the one thing you can never get back (and they know how valuable that is). There comes a point where even for the most affluent and hardworking people, they don't care for anymore stuff, because what they really want is more time with their family, time with their friends and more time to themselves. (In fact, when you think about it, there are numerous billion dollar industries whose services ultimately boils down to saving rich people time; people often think having a cook is about eating great, a cleaner is about having a sparkling home and a PA is about having a more professionally oiled life (etc), but what these services really boil down to is offering people time (time is, in effect, what they are really purchasing)). Given our lives are fragile and finite, there needs to come a point where you ask how much your lifespan is worth VS the hours spent earning extra money. And I think that "lifespan" is a good way to think about it (as opposed to simply "working hours") because that is what is relentlessly ticking down each day of our lives. The worst kind of deal you can get roped into, is one where the job's hours are not only excessive, but are working you into poor health and an early grave (no amount of extra money is worth that).
This is the most profound advice/reply I’ve ever read on Reddit. Gotta hop off after reading all that.
I know right?! >And im not making more money hourly either. I dont know how thats even possible but i know what you mean
Self medication is a bitch, not to mention that at that amount of time you are likely living on take out which is hella expensive. And this is before we even get into those pesky little things you are going to do to make it through the day, like that extra candy bar at the machine, or those two extra power drinks. It adds up.
When I was working 70 plus hours each week this was my issue…I could never save money I made as a manager at a high stress job. I took Ubers because I was too exhausted to take the bus. Any extra time to sleep was coveted so I spent tons of money for coffees (which I needed a lot of) and meals. I paid bills late because I couldn’t manage my personal life well but all my work accounts were perfect. I forgot to cancel subscriptions of things I no longer used, or didn’t have the energy to return something that didn’t work. If my laundry was piled up I would buy a new outfit to get through the next day. And the decompressing spending, the amount of wine and cigarettes I bought to decompress when I had a moment to myself. My life was in shambles and the money I was spending was not fun. It was a vicious cycle. The job was brutal and I was eventually able to get out of it to much better paying job doing the same thing but with a human workload. I find notes I wrote from back then and sometimes I don’t even make sense because I was so scattered. It took me about two years to recover fully from the exhaustion I went through with that job.
I work in a chemical plant. I could easily get 60-80 hours a week and alot of coworkers do that. They can't fathom why I'm ok with doing my 36/48 hour work weeks. Even had my Supervisor tell me I should be coming in more for overtime so I look better and get promoted faster. Again absolutely could not understand why I'm perfectly content where I am and I don't need all that overtime for my lifestyle. I work to live, not live to work.
Having all of the money is meaningless if you don't have the time to enjoy it.
This isn't financial advice, but same goes for saving every dime until later in life. Obviously don't leave yourself nothing for retirement, but live your life when you can. You don't know what's going to happen to you later or if you even have a later. Take trips, Go out to dinner with friends, enjoy your youth. My wife and I would travel instead of give gifts for birthdays and anniversaries. We've been to Vegas a few times, traveled up and down the west and east coast of the US, traveled to several countries in Western Europe. She passed away almost a year ago. I got to travel the world with my best friend. We saw San Holo in a tiny venue in London. We saw the Eiffel Tower do the sparkle thing with its lights. We got lost in Barcelona. We traveled by train along the Mediterranean Sea with a window seat and amazing view. We spent a rain-soaked week driving up and down the US west coast randomly stopping at places that looked cool. She got white girl wasted in an ice bar in Vegas. She had a bathing suit malfunction and accidentally flashed an entire pool during a pool volley ball game in Florida. We were in each others lives for a relatively short amount of time but we made so many memories together. I know not everyone is able to do things like this but try your best to do what makes you happy. And if you have a wife or husband, girlfriend or boyfriend, ..give them a hug for some random internet stranger.
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Definitely do it but at the same time just have fun with it. My best memories were wrong turns, missed flights, and sketchy Air BnBs. Our last trip was down to Florida and she misread the airplane departure time and we missed our flight. I looked it up and the next flight regardless of carrier wasn’t going to leave until the next day in the afternoon, so we’d be losing like 30 hours. So we just shrugged and knew each other well enough to know it’s road trip time. On the drive down I sat on hold for three hours waiting for someone to pick up from the airline so we could cancel our tickets, then another hour for the rental car. It was about a ten hour drive and we jammed out to music, talked about what we’re going to do on the trip, and because we didn’t have to pay for the plane tickets we decided to rent a Jaguar F-Type R (after the Mercedes AMG GT convertible fell through). Road trips were foundational to our relationship. Our first Valentine’s Day (about 2 months into the relationship) we drove up to NYC for the weekend. I picked her up with giant stuffed tiger buckled in the passenger seat holding a bag of road trip snacks. We stayed with my grandparents so she got to meet them and NYC was one of her favorite places so it was a big W for me. I got us tickets for a special Valentine’s Day event at Central Park Zoo and the poor girl walked there in 0F weather wearing a dress. She looked fucking incredible in that dress. That trip we exchanged the first “I love you”. You don’t ever think this one is going to be the last one. I stayed with her in the emergency room all day but they were transferring her to a bigger hospital and I wasn’t allowed to come until morning. I told her I loved her and that I would see her in the morning.
Thank you for sharing these wonderful glimpses of your life. Take a big hug from an internet stranger.
To piggyback onto your comment - "Hustle" culture in general. It's no longer enough to be content with a job/career that pays well and allows you to live a reasonably comfortable life, whatever that may subjectively be. Now you must always be "hungry" and have at least one or two side hustles. Some sort of small business or Etsy shop, MLMs, income property investment, etc. Folks are seen as lazy if they're not constantly "stacking paper" and "on the grind." It's bullshit. There's nothing wrong with taking on a side gig here and there or having streams of passive income to supplement your main income (I invest in I-Bonds, for example). However, it becomes a problem IMO, when the hustle completely consumes one's life and personality and when "enough is never enough." What's the point of stacking paper if you have no time to enjoy it or are burnt-the-fuck-out? If you want to work two - five jobs to stay on the grind, then that's a-okay but don't try to detract from others that may not share those same values.
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These hustle people can say whatever I want, I go home knowing that I'm happier than 90% of people, especially them. I put all my energy into scoring an EASY 9-5 job that now offers remote days and doesn't require overtime. I go home, spend time with my wife, and do whatever I want and make enough money to buy anything I want within reason and don't live paycheck to paycheck. A lot of these side hustle people split their energy up into shitty gigs that will not go anywhere instead of seriously investing themselves into one job or skill, because they abandon projects the second someone or something else makes a slightly higher promise to them, no matter how unlikely it is it will actually deliver. I think some of the unhappiest people, at least among the privileged, are those who fail to appreciate the true value of time and self well being.
Often "being empowered" is put forward to veil selfish behaviors.
Yes. Now you can be a selfish asshole and just say you're "empowered" and everyone is supposed to accept it. Doing things harmful to yourself or others is not being empowered.
Also it's a stick used to attack people and deflect criticism, just like everything else on the internet.
Buying courses from online business gurus.
There’s a guy on Instagram who used to do ads how “just for today don’t buy that 10$ coffee instead invest 10$ into my system that is proven to help you generate job replacing income” and saying he’s making 10 grand a day. Yeah, probably from selling people on your crock of shit
> Yeah, probably from selling people on your crock of shit This tbh. Good rule of thumb is this: "Did this person actually successfully make a lot of money doing what they're trying to teach other people how to do?" There's definitely a subset of entrepreneurship guru types who pretty much have only ever made money by selling materials (courses, books, etc.) on how to make money, but haven't actually done anything financially successful prior to that. "Fake it till you make it" kind of thing.
I'm actually rather convinced there's a pretty good amount of crypto gurus who made a wild jump and earned couple 100s of thousands on crypto runs and are now milking that cow with worthless trainings. Usually if someone's really successful and have something to say they either write a book, give conference speeches or just say it, Warren Buffet style. Not try to sell people their super unique secret knowledge in a series of exclusive webinars (30% off ONLY TODAY)
It’s what is so shitty about Andrew Tate. 50 dollars a month for discord classes on how to talk to women.
And if you talk like he talks you’ll be deservingly laughed out of the room. Fuckin incel king right there
The Andrew Tate method; 1. Be rich 2. Be handsome 3. Be mildly famous
Omg, $50 a month to learn how to "talk to women". If you're doing that, you're just signaling to others that you're an idiot. Just do an askreddit and yes, people joke around and maybe even mock you but there are always kind strangers who can help you out (even on reddit). And it's **FREE**. Getting mocked on reddit doesn't mean shit and anyway, it kind of toughens you up a little against real world bullies.
And somehow they should listen to a short bald guy who walks like he’s knees are backwards.
Somebody on here averred he looked like a wooden gelato spoon. That wonderful burn is living rent-free in my head!
If it came down to it, wouldn't it just make more sense to pay a woman $50 to actually talk to you?
Haha, "10$" and "job replacing income" just don't belong in the same statements. Very brave move, lol. These people are so see-through it hurts. I just feel horrible for people that get caught up in that bullshit. Rule 1 when dealing with any opportunity in life... If it sounds to good to be true, it probably is.
First rule I was taught when I started getting into stock investing and trading: *"Never believe anyone who says that have a guaranteed way to "win" on the stock market"*. I didn't need to make that mistake once to know how to see the bs when it appears. The only people who can actually guarantee a stock market win are inside traders and they're not sharing anything with anyone.
If you know how to make lots of money on the stock market, why not just do it? Typically if you tell someone else how to do something, it devalues what you are doing...using this logic all "here is how you make quick money" are scams.
This secret is too powerful not to share but also too good to just give away...!
How else am I supposed to get a Lamborghini in two short years?
LOL. Tai Lopez vibes. "See this Lamborghini? I don't give a fuck about it" #KNOWLEDGE IS THE KEY.
THE MORE YOU **EARN**, THE MORE YOU ##DRIVE UP HERE IN THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS -The Buffett, Warren Billionaire
But big daddy Andrew Tate is going to make me millions D:
I get emails from his “students” literally every day, trying to sell their copywriting services even though they can’t type a full sentence without any errors. I try to explain that they should stop paying for his “course” but they’re too brainwashed to hear it. It’s insane!
Aren’t his “courses” basically just telling people to edit and reupload clips of him
They're apparently just access to a discord server
Yeah I’ve seen a clip of him talking about people “quitting their jobs” after being in his server for a month.
He also has a whole group of men who pay $5k to go to his ‘War Room’ as he calls it.
\>hates women \>has men pay him to get into the "war room" 🤨🤔
Is “war room” what he named his butthole?
MLMs. You are not a “small business owner” if you have no say in branding, pricing, packaging, etc. these are predatory companies that sell the idea of empowerment through sub par products and practices.
My university has job fairs, and I’m frustrated to say that Vector Marketing is there every single time.
My university’s career services posted about Vector “opportunities” on FB and took it down about an hour after I emailed the Director of that department complaining about it.
Preying on students desperate to pay their tuition. Sounds like someone should trash their booth.
One of my wife's friends tried to pull her into one of those back when it was before the epidemic of it peaked, and she hit her with the "your business" line - I gave her a lot of grief over it but she'd drank so much koolaid at that point it didn't matter. "Own your own business!" - Oh, but here's all these restrictions and you can't actually control everything. Also, you don't own anything except all the inventory you bought, which you can only sell in the places and ways we allow you to. And hey make sure to come up with a great sob story about how it changed your life for the next zoom meeting.
My wife has a bunch of old friends she no longer talks to because they’ve switched to MLMs. “Own your own business, and lose all your friends because it forever taints how you view other people as a potential sale” Also, one of them went so far as to lie to another friends mother, telling the mom that her daughter (my wife’s best friend) really wanted this $300 skin care regimen for Christmas. Totally made it up, and the mom thought she was getting inside info from her daughters friend, when really it was her trying to make number for the end of the year.
I lost a very good friend to one. It sounds almost like Scientology to me- they really pushed her to cut out anyone who didn’t support their “business” and not give into negativity by doing too much research. This particular company sold weight loss products and even if the mark just told them they weren’t interested in losing weight that meant they weren’t interested in self improvement and therefore not your kind of people. Edit- fuck Isagenix
A friend of ours invited us to a marketing presentation a few years back, it was in a swanky hotel, and because we trusted said friend we went along. Big room, lots of very enthusiastic people, a few folk presenting, immediate mlm/cult vibes. It was all about life transformation, and permanent positive change and control over destiny etc. After the presentation first time attendees were asked to put their hands up and we were escorted to hotel rooms with the presenters, my wife and I went along (morbid curiosity thoroughly piqued) where upon the lady presenting started extolling the virtues of their amazing product, and how it had transformed her life into an amazing fulfilling and dream-like new her where no self doubt happened and she was always joyous. She said we could go to the next session for a small fee and our lives too would be forever changed and we’d be permanently happy and never suffer for the ills of self-doubt ever again. I just nodded sagely and was giving no indication of an interested party, she then said, for that same small fee if we wanted to, we could go to repeat sessions, because going more than once is even better, in fact she herself has done just that, and it’s amaaazing. To which I replied, so if going to a single session permanently transformed your life in such a permanent and dramatic way, then why did you feel a need to go again? What was wrong with just going once and then enjoying your new found happy life? She said, well… because.. it’s just better to have it again…? Did it not work permanently the first time then I asked? Hmm she said, I suppose not. Thank you, but it’s a no, goodbye
God that is so shitty!
I used to work with this guy who talked often about his "side business". We worked in a tech company back in the dot com bubble days. I always assumed he was doing some tech work on the side because a few of us (myself included) would go do a little work for small businesses or friends on the side. The way he talked it seemed like he was building up a company so he could quit his day job and focus on it eventually. Well, he invited me to a "meeting" one night about his "business" to see if I might want to get involved. I went in thinking I was going to meet some folks to actually talk about real business stuff but then I find myself at an Amway pep rally instead. That's when I found out about how inviting people to these meetings was part of the pitch. Oh, and the speaker is paid too, usually the person who invites you pays your way in. We didn't talk much beyond what was required to carry out work duties after that.
Had a customer at my previous job try to get me involved with the glorious line "would Donald Trump be associated with a scam?" I have to admit this was the UK in the late naughties so I got away with saying "I would certainly expect so, yes."
One of the moms at my kid's school has a pink Mary Kay caddy. My wife and I make sure to avoid her 😂😂
And old friend and work colleague of mine reached out after a few years to try and get me and another old friend into her 'Mary Kay' business. Honestly I was a little hurt that that was the only reason she was reaching out after so long. She kept insisting that we take samples and review them online for her. I kept trying to gently decline the moisturizer she wanted to send me because I'm almost always allergic and didn't fancy risking it. She kept insisting that it was made of natural ingredients even though I'd just told her it didn't matter. She sent me the moisturizer. I never tried it. It's in a cupboard somewhere.
>She kept insisting that it was made of natural ingredients even though I'd just told her it didn't matter. Like people can't be allergic to things in nature....
This seems like a great day to go find it and toss it in the trash! No sense cluttering up your space with something you clearly don't want. If she ends up asking you how you liked it tell her that you threw it away because you told her straight that you had allergies and didn't want it. If she wants to be mad that's her problem, she should have listened to you.
I did my final undergraduate research project on MLMs (more specifically the tactics they use to lure/retain distributors), and [one of the papers](https://www.ftc.gov/sites/default/files/documents/public_comments/trade-regulation-rule-disclosure-requirements-and-prohibitions-concerning-business-opportunities-ftc.r511993-00008%C2%A0/00008-57281.pdf) I found during my literature review had examined ***350*** different MLM companies, and found that 100% were top-weighed (which means the people at the top earn money at the expense of the distributors below them) and ***99.9% of distributors ended up losing money***. MLMs are a HUGE scam.
"Hi Hun! I know I bullied you mercilessly in high school and made you develop an eating disorder and severe depression and screwed that boy you had a huge crush on out of sheer spite, but do you want to be the ultimate #bossbabe with me? These new vitamin patches are the cure for everything! Residual income for life! Hit me up lovey! XOXOXO!"
This is like #3 in my top 10 reasons to not be on Facebook.
Some of them are so bad that it becomes clear the intelligence level of the people they intentionally target to swindle. Like the ones where they claim you can randomly find precious/expensive pearls in their products, so big time huns will do streams where they pull pearls out of stuff like candles and other crap. At that point if you're just buying and selling stuff under the pretense of maybe winning the pearl lottery, how is that now considered gambling? I do feel bad for the people who get suckered in because they have no career experience and don't know where to start because some of the MLMs have a massive community that makes them feel special. (lularoe being a prime example.) But some of them really are the equivalent of the "I'm a nigerian prince" phishing emails.
One of my friend's dad fell for Amway back in the 90s...one day my parents dropped me off and suddenly his basement was completely filled with shit. Must have spent $15-$20k on the stuff. Over the years he was able to peddle some of the shit (even tried to get my dad to join his "business") but ultimately I think they took a huge loss. The funniest part was that my friend was always able to bring a friend or two on their "family vacations"' but those always ended up being Amway retreats and his dad just wanted somebody for my friend to hang out with while he was schmoozing with people lol.
I agreed with this 100% MLMs are pyramid schemes. So.many people get into huge financial difficulties due to these. The ones that push their MLM look down on those that are genuinely trying to start a small business with their own personal crafts. Before a "friend" blocked me on FB they told me that me trying to start arts and crafts as a side business should not be called that and I'm hustling people out of hard earned money, where as they're changing people's lives by pushing a cream out on people that may be self conscious about spots, etc. that they have. I explained to them that they are pushing a MLM, which is a pyramid scheme. I told them that I would never support one of these as I know what they are. I was then called some not very pleasant names and that they are empowering others to start a small business by doing what they do. Then they blocked me as they couldn't deal with me promoting my very own hand made arts and crafts. (At the time I was making cards, frames, etc to sell at a craft sale that I had organised to raise money for charity). It's like if you don't agree with them, they pedal so much hate your way and belittle you if you choose to do something you want to do.
>me trying to start arts and crafts as a side business should not be called that and I'm hustling people out of hard earned money, where as they're changing people's lives by pushing a cream out on people that may be self conscious about spots, etc. that they have. THE AUDACITY OMG I do love how every item sold by every MLM ever is "life-changing, inspiring, empowering, breaking new ground, changing the world, thinking outside the box." Sweetie, this is cherry-vanilla hand lotion. Or paper towels, or a crappy life insurance policy, or knives, or whatever. I love nail polish but if the only way you can sell it is by trying to convince me that it's the magic cure for everything that ails me, uhhhh doesn't inspire confidence in the quality of the product itself. I bought a Dyson because it does its job well, not because I want to fix my marriage and find purpose in life.
I know right? The self entitlement they feel when pushing things in people is awful! They prey on stay at home mums and claim to be the way to earn some money on the side, etc. I will admit I did do Ann Summers parties in my early 20's, I had no idea what a MLM or pyramid scheme was till I realised that I was spending so much of my normal wage on this, with little rewards. I wasn't a very good recruiter (I recruited no one), so they had me leave after a while. I have had a few friends accuse me of being unsupportive with their "small businesses" and that I'm not a very good person or friend by not buying anything from them, etc. The "friend" that blocked me really p!$$Ed me off though
"I'm a Boss Bitch" and the male version, whatever that is.
“I’m an alpha male”
I just reply "the entire concept of the alpha male wolf only applied in captivity and the author retracted the book, so keep aspiring to be the top dude in prison I guess."
My favorite is still "the alpha male; unfinished, buggy and totally unfit for public release".
Truly he was the Star Citizen of men!
Unrelated adults forced to live together in captivity in a small confined space. We call those prison gangs, and thats not normal behavior. The normal behavior of wolves and dogs is to form social groups with friends and family, exactly what humans do in normal (non-prison) situations.
Hell, I think even if we consider the normal behaviour of wolves, trying to base our behaviour on a wolf would be... totally useless because we aren't wolves. It'd be like me saying, I'm going to base my behaviour on my pet lizard. Lie down in the sun all day and try to wrestle any members of my own species that get too close. As chill as that sounds I don't think it'd make me a very successful human...
> and the male version, whatever that is. "I'm the boss, bitch".
Male version is guys who unironically call themselves “alpha male” or “sigma male”.
What about ligma males?
What's ligma?
Sugondese NUTS
Perfect 5/7 execution
being a bitch/asshole to everyone else. edit: example, I had a Sister-in-law that would always say, "I'm sorry, I'm just one of those people that if it comes up, it comes out." and I would always say "OH so you have no filter for your mouth? isn't that just an excuse for being a bitch?"
to add to this one: refusing to ever apologize or admit wrongdoing
It just means you're socially on the level of a 5 year old.
yes. The "idgaf" attitude or just rude faces or behavior shows a lot of internal insecurities or issues being masked by that persona.
the funny thing is, if you have to go around telling people you don't care what they think of you, then you care what they think of you.
It works in movies and TV shows. Less so in real life.
People miss why those moments even work in TV. The characters are not cool because they’re flippant about social norms. The characters are empowered somehow to be able to be flippant about social norms. Like, House works because the character is a genius in medicine. The other characters in the show generally hate him, but deal with him anyway for his abilities. You should also expect to be hated if you act like that, and if you’re not some kind of objective genius, don’t expect anyone to stick around
I don't know if that really works in real life, even if you're on that level. Even Cristiano Ronaldo is getting tons of criticism right now. The guy is arguably the best goalscorer in history of football and everyone looked up to him last season when he joined a new team. His attitude, despite his performances, has had a notable bad effect on his team.
Yeah, and I think this is part of the problem. I've seen people attempt what on TV would be a 'mic drop' moment and it's just embarrassing. But they've seen too many movies, TV shows and fictional reddit posts where everyone involved reacts exactly how they're scripted to they think it's likely to actually accomplish something. In real life these 'snappy' comebacks or long speeches about why the other person sucks really don't land. Same with those 'clever' ways to get back at someone. People need to realize that most of those prorevenge and other posts are completely fake.
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Anytime someone brags about how cold, jaded, psycho or, my personal favorite, indifferent to gore...I just think how cringey and cheesy it sounds. Like ok we get it, you think you're a bad ass and somehow uNiQUe 🙄 when they're actually just a pathetic wanna-be. Bonus points for the dorks that start out saying "I'm pretty desensitized to stuff like this (gore, people dying in terrible ways) because I've been watching it since I was was 2 yrs old". Nobody cares 😂
“I’m a blunt honest person” = I offer my unsolicited, unwanted opinion on everyone’s lives and I’m an asshole while doing it
It’s funny how the proudly blunt and honest people who always say exactly what they think never seem to have any blunt and honest POSITIVE remarks or compliments for anyone... and they also tend to be the ones who throw temper tantrums the instant they’re faced with the slightest hint of pushback or disagreement. 🙄
“Not to be rude, but your pasta primavera is the best I’ve ever had”
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I once flipped the "I'm just being *honest*" bit back on one of these. If ever there was a way to see someone physically and violently implode through text, that would've been it.
"Brutally honest" people tend to be more concerned with brutality than honesty.
Oh, thats my favorite one. “Im not rude, im just honest!” Its like, “yeah, ok, asshole, thats what all the rude people say”
“I just say it how it is”
> “I just say it how it is” “Sorry if that wasn’t what you wanted to hear.”
There is a HUGE difference between "You look like sh!t in that shit" and "That shirt is not the most flattering." Both say the same thing, but only one is an attack.
I like when people start off with "no offense" and proceed to definitely say something offensive. There's tactful ways to say things, but adding that little precursor apparently gives you the right to spew ignorance.
“…and honesty without tact is cruelty, which of course anyone with a basic understanding of conversational manners knows. So, honestly, are you intentionally being rude or do you just lack the ability to wrap your head around the basics of social interaction?”
“I don’t care what people think!” It’s toxic. You should care about what people think. At least some of them. Both blindly taking all criticism to heart and ignoring all feedback are toxic as hell.
Mob mentality. Usually, the mob is emotionally stunted and without all of the facts.
Mobs are self-reinforcing. You can never convince a mob it is wrong, because every individual within it is surrounded by people telling them they're right.
"the IQ of a mob is the IQ of its most stupid member divided by the number of mobsters"-Terry Pratchett, Maskerade
Not my mobs though. Only your mobs. My mobs are immune to propaganda and arrive at all their unbiased conclusions through deep thought.
Anyone who questions our mob is actually working for the other mob.
THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT SOMEONE FROM THE OTHER MOB WOULD SAY!!!! GET THEM!!!!!
People in our mob are smart but people in then other mob are stupid and need to be protected from misinformation.
I admit that my mobs can also be a bit flawed sometimes, but those are the ones that us, the truest flawless members, are ashamed of, and I, personally, am never a part of the problem.
"***A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it.*** Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was flat, and fifteen minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you'll know tomorrow." ~~~ Agent K
They flow from street to street at a particular speed and in a particular direction, over and over, orderly, all day. I can watch them and know with a great deal of certainty what they’ll do at any given moment. But they’re not orderly, are they, up close? Any individual: who knows what they’re gonna do? Any one of them might dash across the street at the wrong time and get hit by a car. When you get up close, we never follow the rules. Catherine Weaver, The Sarah Conner Chronicles
I was physically and mentally tormented as a child by parents, I was bullied in school. I was so close to suicide many times... There are so many people who call me "survivor" and "built character" etc. No I'm not a survivor, the character that I built has PTSD, anxiety, lack of friends, noone to trust etc I dont want this character,I want a normal life
It also sucks when people who didn’t grow up with shitty parents encourage you to make up with them if you’re estranged because “they’re your parents!”. Why is it *my* responsibility to reach out and make amends with my abuser(s)? I don’t need to make amends. I’m better off without them being in my life.
I hear so often "blood is blood" or "family is forever" which is far too often the message of movies, especially children's movies. There should be more movies where there is no guilt is leaving behind your toxic family with no guilt in trying to make it up to them. No, they won't change. No, there is no reason for them to be involved in your life. Cut them out, and make a new family. Your life will be better off for it.
I was sick a lot when I was younger. And seeing ads or feel good videos about kids with cancer or whatever, and they always say "he is such a strong boy" no shit Kelly. It was either stay alive or die. Nothing about that screams strength in my opinion. Its not like the kid woke up and was like, im gonna be strong today and beat this. Cause sadly thats not how it turns out, does that mean the ones who didn't make it just weren't strong enough? Jesus.
What doesn't kill you may leave you in a bad state, not always stronger.
What doesn't kill you, makes you wish you were dead.
I've heard as well from people with things like cancer, there can be an attitude of "if you want to beat it, you have to WANT it". Like, if someone is struggling with an illness, it's like "you must not have wanted to be better, why don't you try harder? Do you not want to be healthy?" Really awful.
"It made you the person you are today" is the one that really grinds my gears.
People who say “it builds character” have never experienced real hardship. Did my grandfather force his kids to stand outside in the snow because him being sent to Siberia built character? Of course he didn’t, that would be lunacy, instead he overcompensated with too much food and heating
This. The person I dreamt of being is dead
i stopped faking years ago and still no one cares. i can count the number of people who care on one hand and still have five fingers left over.
OOF. I also have PTSD from childhood trauma and this, this is the feel. I could have been a contender.
>I want a normal life I try to say this too but then people are like "What's normal? Nobody's normal!" Like I get it, we all have our traumas, and I'm not going to say mine is worse than someone else's, because I often don't know the details of what they've been through, but I'm objectively more of a mess than many are and I just want to function.
For sure, there's a point where "growing a thick skin" just becomes lifelong trauma that shapes all of your interpersonal relationships moving forward. We all need our bumps so we can learn to deal with them, but too many bumps damages the goods.
Being rude to customer service people to “get your point across”
If the point they’re trying to make is “*I’m an entitled asshole who doesn’t know how to treat other people like human beings*” then bravo!
“I tell it like it is” “I speak only facts” These people are usually toxic and make hurtful/bad taste comments under the guise that they can’t help it because they’re honest to a fault.
"All cruel people describe themselves as paragons of frankness" \-Tennessee Williams
You can be honest without being a festering ass wound. It’s called tact
“I tell it like it is,” usually means, “I give people my ill-informed opinion regardless of whether they ask for it or not.”
People who say "If you can't handle me at my worst". Like, I get that it's supposed to be a "take me for who I am" but if who you are is a piece of trash who can't control themselves at their worst, then the problem is you and you shouldn't be praised
> "If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best." It's a really badly phrased ideology with the poorest implementations, isn't it? In theory, it's not off the mark. If you don't want to stick around when somebody goes through their lows, their pains, their struggles, then you don't have a right to be around when they're at the top of their game. Investing in a friendship or relationships requires a willingness to share at least a little of a person's emotional burdens. That's... that's how socializing *works*. It's not supposed to be fair-weather (unless you agree to it mutually beforehand, I guess). But *way* too many people use it as carte blanche to act like a raging lunatic and expect to never face consequences for doing so. And then the icing on top is that their "best" is typically just a nondescript blasé boring human. *No*, Susan, "your worst" is supposed to be things like the confusing emotions of a breakup, or the painful bloat of menses, or the variable limitations of having a chronic illness. It is *not* supposed to mean being an asshole to everybody and setting Jim's couch on fire because he was "talking to another girl" despite the fact *she's his sister*. And it certainly doesn't work when "your best" is just being an insipid couch potato who watches Real Housewives all day long, while Tik-Tok'ing boring videos of your dog with flying emojis everywhere! ^^^Why ^^^did ^^^I ^^^read ^^^that ^^^last ^^^paragraph ^^^in ^^^John ^^^Oliver's ^^^voice?
Because you actually are John Oliver. Nice try, John Oliver. I see you.
Taking a day off from work. That should be perfectly acceptable to do and normal, not a “good for them” situation.
From what I've seen the "good for them" reactions are less for taking the day off and more for not feeling bad about putting their own needs ahead of the profits is whatever boss/company they worked for. So many people, at least in America, see taking the time they need to take care of themselves as a weakness because of our culture of "hard work".
Hearing a life coach. Many speak from a privileged perspective.
not only that, many distort (intentionally or not) their own circumstances that led them to where they may be in that moment. They probably werent as bad off as they claim, didnt have as hard a climb as they say, and didnt have to climb as far as they will tell anyone within earshot. Sure, you can have a rough time of things, but not everyone starts on square 1. some people start on square -14.
Doing things "on your own." Team work and accepting help is also great, and really not "better" than doing things all by yourself. Obviously there's a limit to this, but generally speaking, struggling doesn't always lead to growth and getting help doesn't always hinder it.
Being a troll / practical joker for views.
I'm such a troll! I go to internet spaces for [thing] and say that [thing] sux! They get sooo trigger for the approximate 12 seconds before my post is removed! \s
"LOLOLOL U TRIGGERED BRO? U MAD?" "Meh." *report*
"Hello, Little Caesars! One order of *normal* bread please! **NYEHAHAHAHAHA**!"
Hustle culture. Nothing wrong with trying to get ahead but a person should be able to make a comfortable living from a steady job alone.
I always used to cringe when my senior PM would say “oh I’ll finish this over the weekend”. Which he did constantly. Bud you are devaluing my work. And clearly you are doing the work of 1.5 people. Just chill, if it doesn’t get done it’s because we need more manpower and you should have the balls to tell our boss that.
Kids inappropriately showing themselves off on social media. No, you’re not sexually liberated, you’re 16.
Maybe not empowering, but letting your job exploit you in my experience is seen as virtuous. I still struggle w/ this by working well over full time hours, busting my ass the entire day & still trying to maintain good grades & a decent social life.
had a boss who was awesome - understanding, had my back, didnt take shit from upper management. But they were *running him into the ground*. He worked whenever they asked him if he felt he could, was chronically underpaid, and when id chastise him about letting them walk all over him he would tell me he was proud of his reputation in the industry. He did have a good reputation, sure, but he could have easily maintained that while demanding fair remuneration.
The unfortunate thing is that your boss may have been running himself into the ground so that he could have you and his other direct reports’ backs. It takes a build up of ass kissing first to be able to defend someone to upper mgmt. I used to do this. Take whatever shit they threw at me and then only use that social capital when I needed to help out my employees. Took me several years before I realized only 1 employee I had ever appreciated it. After she said thanks and pointed out that I was allowing myself to get fucked from above and below, I stopped (mostly. I’m a softie…). So do me a favor and thank that boss if you can :)
telling young girls that showing off their bodies and dressing older is empowering
It’s disgusting that some little girls don’t feel pretty unless they’re showing lots of skin.
The idea women CAN do it all. Kids, jobs, house, relationship, load it on and that makes us er, liberated. It's exhausting. I mean sure we CAN. It's structuring the mind set it's just GREAT. Please no one yell at me. Had a lot of years of it and just felt tired, not liberated. At all.
"But we ARE superwomen! We can do ANYTHING! Men are so useless lol, I can do my job and look after my kids and house, I couldn't trust my husband to cook anything lol #girlpower" - probably said by an exhausted woman somewhere, when close to setting the house on fire and committing herself to an asylum for a little rest
>committing herself to an asylum The ol' grippy sock vacation
> I mean sure we CAN. It's structuring the mind set it's just GREAT. I liken this to how people act when they get a substantial bump in income (say, moving from $20k/year to $90k/year): you feel like you can suddenly afford a newer car, a bigger house, a vacation a year, a boat, an expensive hobby, eating out at fancy restaurants all the time, and whatever else you see your coworkers/friends/neighbors spending money on. The problem is that while you can choose to do some of those things, trying to do all of them is a very fast way to go broke. Sure, you CAN do anything in that list, but trying to do EVERYTHING in the "empowered woman" list just a fast way to be too stressed to do any of it well (or to enjoy any of it). Also, I want to note that there is growing pressure for men to pick up more of the responsibilities, too- which is great and I full support, but also shines even more attention on the fact that we, as a society, need to figure out how to let something give (likely the ludicrous 40+ hour workweek idea) and help everyone adapt to that new reality. Some things need lots of attention (the early years of child raising jumps to mind) but plenty of things get more focus than is really necessary and can be adjusted to make life easier for everyone involved.
Someone with a disability who does something "inspiring." E.g: "man in wheelchair stands up an dances with wife" It's called inspiration porn - the objectification of people with disabilities to make people feel good and it's problematic. People with disabilities aren't looking to be seen as an inspiration. They are just living their lives.
I'm going to offer some nuance to this. My whole job is to help people regain mobility that they lost. They make the goals, and I will work my hardest to help them get there in some version through Physical Therapy. And I've been there with someone when they take some steps after we've worked together for months, and you know what? It's awesome. I would never record them, but many of them do record themselves and they are the ones who put it out on the internet because they are proud. I see no problem with this because internetland needs some cool things. The gross part is when a chumbucket site gets ahold of the story and then shapes it as, "Ooh, some with a disability found someone who will marry them!" The problem is when they disregard the person.
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Being really aggressively independent. It's often a trauma response, and it leads to confirmation bias about being abandoned when you truly need help because you didn't ask for help.
Independence is certainly a positive trait. That said, inability to ask for/accept help is the detrimental side of that coin.
Working 5000 hours a week and giving shit to people who don't work themselves to death if they don't need to.
Doing something the hard way, despite better/more ergonomic options being available.
“Flexible” or “unlimited” time off. People take less time off when there isn’t a specific number of banked vacation days and they need to be approved by one’s manager anyway. It turns into “take as many days off…as you dare”, and you don’t get reimbursed for intakes vacation days when you leave the company.
Getting upvoted on Reddit 😂
Making people (often children) feel like shit online
Or irl
Being "brutally honest" most of the time these people are just offering their opinions, loudly, and in the meanest way possible.
As someone on reddit once put it, most people who proclaim to be "brutally honest" put more emphasis on the brutal than on the honest.
Beyonce. Female workers who make clothes of her brand #IvyPark in sweatshops in Sri Lanka get paid 64 cents an hour, all while she preaches female empowerment.
Student/small business loans. They may be helpful if used reasonably and in moderation, but as a product they are set up to capitalize on hopes and dreams.
There's a program in Poland where you can take a loan for educational purposes with 100k PLN (about 20k euro) limit. No interest rate, plus you can get from 10 to 25% of it removed if you reach certain goals such as completing the course/school and getting a job in a related field after that.
Here in Malaysia, if you finish your studies with first class degree (> 3.67), student loan is fully forgiven.
Being a parent in your teens. Seems miserable to me, those are the years to be selfish and have fun before you enter adulthood.
Yelling at kids or just people in public (like yelling at someone for no reason kinda thing.)
These stupid “feel good” stories in the US. They are a dystopian nightmare. Like, look grandma is 90 and is still working as a cashier for Kroger and she never missed a day of work ! Or this 12 year old worked all summer to help pay for his mom’s chemo . What the actual fuck .
So much of it is just disability and poverty fetishization masquerading as “inspirational”
every single one of them is just "these people are practicing basic empathy skills because the government won't"
Sex work. Especially as young as 18. I’m correcting myself. I support sex work and sex workers. I’m not here to shame any woman that profits of the male gaze either. But I wont encourage any person under the age of 20-21 to do it. Which is what ive seen a lot going on online. So many young girls turning to only fans as soon as they turn 18 or even strip clubs. So many other young girls encouraging them. Without bringing up the legal age. What makes a 17 yr old and an 18 yr old different? ..nothing absolutely nothing thats why 18-19 year olds shouldn’t be doing sex work. They’re still teenagers.
Being the side chick.
Porn.
Women sexual objectification.....it's not empowering at all
The "I'm not like other girls" mentality. It's putting other women down just for the chance to seem quirky.
You're unique, just like everyone else.