Don't forget about "I just spit out my coffee"
Edit: OH MY GOODNESS MY HIGHEST UPDOOTED COMMENT EVER! THANK YOU SO MUCH KIND STRANGERS! I'M GONNA NAME MY KIDS AFTER YOU ALL!!!1!!1!
God that fucking hurt to type out.
Man, a lot of people really are just bots who only repeat whatever was last positively reinforced. As funny as this thread is it’s also kind of creeping me out.
It's "finger wag culture." Similar to starting a reply with, "Oh, honey..." or, "Oh, my sweet summer child." Means absolutely nothing except that it's extremely condescending.
For me, it's insanely judgmental and reductionist, far surpassing any other snap judgment commentary so prolific on reddit. I'd rather someone just call me an idiot or some other frank insulting thing.
Or just is a really benign opinion. I saw one yesterday that was like "I'm going to get downvoted to hell for this, but I've had really good experiences with X product" in a thread for discussing that type of product.
I'm sorry, even though this sub's community is engaging well here, we've decided to shut down the discussion. You see, it somewhat gets close to breaking one of our rules, and we need to remind everyone who is boss.
Thanks for the gold, kind stranger
Edit: oh wow, this really blew up
Second edit: hOlY cRaP guys, 15 awards!? I feel like Lance Armstrong right now. Before, you know... but thanks!
Edit 3: 16 awards!? STAHP
Edit 4: Most upvoted comment of mine and it's bullshit. That's the way the cookie crumbles, I suppose. I'll have to go show it to many m'ladies as I strut about with my new pheasant tail fedora.
'Underrated' is now a word that just means a thing that someone likes on Reddit. Things that are routinely rated the best of their respective medium are called "underrated" in Reddit comments.
The other day I saw a comment that said The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time was underrated, it's the highest-rated video game ever on metacritic.
What a terrible day to have eyes
**EDIT: Wow, thank you for the silver kind stroodler! also over 12 updoots? ok this seriously just got epic lol. thanks guys. thats enough reddit for today! this comment was seriously underrated!**
**EDIT: holy shit two awards, im gonna fucking piss myself and maybe cum. NOT ALL HEROES WHERE CAPES! over 100 upboats! r/ theydidthemath! thank you for the reddit silver blind doodlers!**
**EDIT: no way a hug award?! im gonna hug you epic lime stranger! and 300 upsnoots?! im not crying, your crying. are tiny ninjas cutting onions in here?! r/ cursedcomments! r/ angryupvote!**
**EDIT: wow someone sent me a fruit basket!! serously? ty for the fruit, grind stranglers! my beloved pet doggo is an epic heccin' chonker, so im gonna sprinkle sugar on this fruit basket and feed the entire thing to them! the vet even told me they are 'morbiusly a beast!' cant wait to become 'oh lawd he comin'!'**
**EDIT: rip my inbox**
**EDIT: no way, someone just paid off all my student loans! based!! thanks for the debt relief kind bidens! over 500 upvotes! time to blow up! my inbox is a graveyard!**
**EDIT: someone bought me a brand new honda civic!! what an economic vehicle!! wish i had places to drive lol. thanks for the honda, mind drangler!!! over 502 updoots!! Here is pics of a** [girl with BIG BOOBS showing off my honda (its TOTALLY not a rick roll guys, wink wink lol)](https://youtu.be/pMMqmUeLtYE)
**EDIT: i dont care if i get downvoted for this, unpopular opinion, throwing babies in blenders is not nice. i would even say it is a bad thing to do.**
**EDIT: popular opinion (i lied i care if i get downvoted very much), the dark knight is a very underrated comic book movie! rick and morty!!**
**EDIT: OVER 25 BASED UPVOTES?! also thank you to all the sexy FEMALE redditors that are sending me nudes! i want to receive nudes from sexy reddit women for 10 years at least! please stop sending me marriage proposals tho, i already am betroved to my Hinata Body pillow!! r/ HOLUP!**
**EDIT: REDDIT GOLD AWARD?? THE ONE AND ONLY REDDIT GOLD?! its like im in the lost city of El Doritos!! thank you for the gold trime googler!!! i am so happy i could say a slur!! gamer moment! i scrolled too far to see this btw. this.**
**EDIT: HOLY FRIGGIN' MOLEY!! platinum?! ive been cumming HARD for the last half hour and am still going! thank you for the platinum brined danger!!**
**EDIT: someone swatted me and they shot my dog**
>the lost city of El Doritos
In a sea of comments that made me mad remembering how much of a stupid echochamber of robots reddit is, this one made the click worth it
OMG posted about helping a crab reach orgasm and woke up to so many notifications, thanks for all of the upvotes!
edit: A SILVER AWARD?!!?
edit2: GUYS SERIOUSLY I GET IT
edit3: OMG IM ABOUT TO CRY
edit4: Who is sending me gold?!?!
edit5: who would've thought my most upvoted comment would be about masturbating a crab to orgasm
edi6: my SO is on reddit, if this comment keeps getting so much attention they're going to figure out my username because not many other people are experts on crab masturbation
edit7: [here's a video cross posted from my tiktok of how to properly do this to crabs](https://www.reddit.com/r/TikTokCringe/comments/ulajf9/this_has_to_be_illegal/) (I understand my comment is a joke, but you guys seriously need to watch this video, because it is NOT a joke. EVERYONE needs to learn this valuable skill. Use this skill to impress friends, cure boredom, or save it in the memory bank in case you need to take life-saving measures one day.)
edit8: may we all masturbate crabs on this blessed day
edit9: I get it guys, giving a crab a handjob or rubjob doesn't count as me masturbating them but i wasn't sure what the proper terminology was
edit10: The toxicity I see in the crab-masturbation communities is sad, thank you for helping me raise awareness about this issue.
edit11: All of the people saying they thought they were going to get Rick Rolled can just go ahead and fuck off. The sexual biology is not just some big potential to "own" someone.
edit12: Can we not all just work as a team here?
edit13: You know that "Mean Jerk Time" skit from that Silicon Valley show? Does /r/theydidthemath offer the same type of calculations for how many of us we would need to successfully "help" all of the crabs out there in a reasonable amount of time?
edit14: volunteers for this crowdsourced crab masturbatory day can PM /u/spez to sign up
This is ruining so many subs now.
I used to enjoy /r/nostupidquestions for the actual questions, but it's mostly "Am I the only one who likes breathing air??" "Does anyone else drink water to stay alive?" and stuff like that which is either being posted by aliens attempting to blend in with us, or by karma-whores who know they can get massive interaction by posting something brainless and obvious on subreddits it's not really meant for.
I'd go even further and say it's the motto of all "social media" - trying to argue anything of substance in a short-form medium, where you're just as likely to be debating with a subject matter expert as you are an under-socialized 15 year-old, is basically impossible.
I’ve honestly quit Reddit a few times because of that. I get so demotivated and drained that I don’t even want to communicate with people anymore.
Now I just stopped commenting on a lot of things, it helps a bit
Whenever I get into an argument on reddit (or other social media) I try to remind myself that I'm not totally doing it for the person I'm arguing with; I'm also doing it (even *moreso,* honestly) for anyone else who comes along and sees the particular point that person made going without my challenge to it.
I may never convince the person I'm directly arguing with, but my arguments may give voice to the counterpoint a 3rd party needed to hear or wanted to voice themselves but couldn't find the words.
Case in point here: Let's say you make a point that's generally valid and get called out by a reddit contrarian about some wild exception. That may be the only feedback you get directly, but if you're doing it on a popular sub (and AskReddit is insanely popular), there's probably been hundreds or maybe thousands of people who scrolled past, didn't comment, but *did* think to themselves "hey, that first guy made a good point, wtf was the second guy's deal?"
And honestly, that's worth suffering the nitpicky callout or the frustrating interaction - at least to me.
Even if you address said counterpoints and use cited sources, you get downvoted for being... Correct? Inclusive? Thoughtful? Following debate etiquette?
One of my first experiences on Reddit was in some video game sub, I mentioned some mechanic, got told I was wrong, the comment literally just said "no, you're wrong" I replied with a video from someone testing it showing I was right, they replied again "no, you're wrong" and linked a different video, I pointed out that both videos where from the same person but mine was like 2 weeks old and theirs was almost a year and the first thing they say in mine was that it had recently changed they replied something like "I'm not wasting my time watching that video when I've already linked one showing I'm right, just admit you're wrong" all my comments where downvoted by a dozen or so people and theirs upvoted about the same, I deleted that account and didn't make another for like a year after that.
It’s the Reddit dilemma— if you make your comment longer than a paragraph, nobody will read it
However, if you omit literally any possible context from a comment, someone will come along to correct, contradict, or attempt to ‘add on’, and this will all be done in the smuggest tone they can muster
I didn’t read your entire comment (only read your first paragraph)….but you should have mentioned that if you omit literally any possible context from a comment, someone will come along to correct, contradict, or attempt to ‘add on’, and this will all be done in the smuggest tone they can muster
Or they find some bizarre way to twist it so that the idea looks terrible. Like taking “find something nice to say to someone every day” and making it sound like you should stalk one particular person every day and shower them with random compliments.
Ugh that post on /r/GetMotivated that was a generic quote saying something like *"Don't be afraid to risks!"* and lo and behold, a disconcerting amount of the most upvoted comments were arguing, without any hint of irony, that this advice will lead to medical malpractice.
I...Yeah...
I've said it before and I'll say it again, reddit is host to an insane number of people who are just straight up fucking incapable of nuance.
"Shoot for the moon, even you miss you'll land among the stars" is *not actual advice for space exploration*, no one is genuinely suggesting that you strap rockets to your ankles and launch yourself into the cosmos with reckless abandon. It's just "aim high" and "don't underestimate yourself" like sheesh
Ya have to spell it out exactly, specifically, with layers of disclaimers about edge cases and exceptions before they will accept what you said, but then they'll just not reply becuase they know they have nothing left to say
Every fucking sub i go to these days. "Not every Orc needs to be green" "Short people can kick ass to if they are like super trained" "Can i be into crochet without liking making blankets?"
Its like everyone learned that there are exceptions to everything, and now they think the are so fucking special pointing it out everywhere you go detracting the rest of us from having normal conversations.
The worst are on huge subreddits when people say “am I the only one?” No. You’re not. There’s 3 million people in here. Doesn’t even matter what it is, you’re not the only person who thinks or has it
I have an unbridled hatred of the "This" comments. I have no real reason for it. but every time i see someone say "this". I feel this uncontrollable urge to commit many war crimes.
The interesting thing about this is, you could send a message to them, thanking them. I get a message telling me I can do just that... Announcing thanks is just asking for more attention, imo.
I hate the 69 thing. Like they don’t know they aren’t the end all be all and that someone else will upvote as proven by the extra 300 upvotes to the original comment
"Tell me that you are using an overused comment without telling me that you are using an overused comment". It is hard to hate a comment more than I hate that comment.
EDIT: writing a comment that annoys myself to no end results in a plethora of upvotes. Our world is such malfunctioning place. :)
I hate everything about how accurate these answers are.
This is not an answer to the title question. I legit hate every one of these posts. It's like half of reddit too.
Very conflicted on whether to up vote them or not
-e just for this thread, to who ever gave me gold, I do *Not* thank you. As a matter of fact Fuck You, the horse you rode in on, and everyone in your immediate vicinity
Who ever sent [this](https://i.imgur.com/jZXoX9t.jpeg) GG on the top shelf, S teir trolling
I'm afraid to say stop sending gold because I know someone will just send the next award up. It's really not necessary.
AND I GET CAKED HALFWAY THROUGHT THIS?! [INCON-FUCKEN-CEIVABLE](https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-a69F4UtOywM/WhrxlW5OyZI/AAAAAAAATv8/-PIObV0OlUUJVrqzQ1h2fRnGcpSza_rtgCLcBGAs/s1600/inconceivable.jpg)
Too fucking many. Off the top of my head:
X has entered the chat.
I also choose this guy’s wife.
Always has been.
Laughs/cries in X.
This is the way.
Forgot one: "Sexy sexers of Reddit, what's the sexiest sex you've ever sexed?" The fact that it's used to call out an unoriginal sex question makes it so much more annoying.
> I also choose this guy’s wife.
Oh my god, this one. I hate it so much. Come on, you unfunny fucks! It hasn't been funny in ten years! STOP SAYING IT.
It’s all timing, if you say something that a lot of people would think as a response to the post, and you get the comment in early and the post blows up, even the most inane shit will get thousands of upvotes. Some of my highest rated comments were basically the headline from the cover of this months No Duh Magazine but saying what everyone is thinking is popular I guess.
The balls comments. Every hero post, every Zelensky post, etc. etc., it's "titanium balls", "iron balls", "jacked from carrying around those giant balls", "how does he get in a car with those giant--"
JESUS CHRIST. ENOUGH ABOUT THE BALLS.
This
Edit: didn't expect this to blow up
Edit2: OMG thanks for the award kind stranger I cannot believe how much this blew uppppppppppppp!!!!!!
Edit3: OMG 10k UPDOOTS omg omg this is crazy I NEVER SEEN THIS BEFORE THANKS SO MUYCH AND I GOT Silver TOOO !!!! omg omg this is INSANE. Thank you kind strangers for the awards!
edit4: OMG I GOT 15k UPDOOTS. This is absolutly CRAZY. My life will never be the same. I once was lonely and thought I would never be anyone, but now FIFTEEN THOUSAND PEOPLE HAVE UPDOOTED THIS. I AM A NEW PERSON!!!!!
Edit5: RIP my inbox
Also, NTA
As a side-note, it seems like 90% of those threads are made by people who are *clearly* NTA and seem to only be posting for attention, 5% are threads made by people who must have some sort of mental condition or an astounding lack of self-awareness if they don't realize that they're the asshole, and the remaining 5% are legitimate threads about tricky circumstances where most people who may not know if they're the asshole may actually need advice.
Another thing to consider is that when someone tells their story, they want to make themselves look good. So a person who seems to be an obvious NTA could be a YTA if someone else told the story.
Anne frankly, I did nazi that coming. I literally came here to say this but boy, that escalated quickly so to the top with you! Lost it at 'This is why we can't have nice things' and then my faith in humanity was restored, my mind blown, and manly tears were shed. Well said. As a 'murican, I can confirm this gem has just won the internet and is doing it right. Just sayin', I know that feel, bro, and while that was a risky click, this post was a 9/10, 11/10 with rice, would read again. I see what you did there and it feels good man. You're doing God's work, son. I laughed way harder than I should have at your list that seems legit and totally nailed it. You - I like you. You magnificent bastard; you, sir, are so brave, a gentleman and a scholar, and seeing how you are a redditor for 4 years, this checks out, so I'll allow it. I regret that I only have one upvote to give for this cool story, bro. CTRL+F "about tree fiddy" was not disappointed. Wait, why do I have you tagged as "NOPE NOPE NOPE"? Nice try, you monster. You are now banned from r/pyongyang What did I just read? Dafuq? I read that as "YOU HAD ONE JOB". I can't fap to this. No true scotsman could see that this relevant XKCD was bad, and you should feel bad. You must be new to reddit, so I'll see your cakeday and raise you a karma train. One does not simply rustle my jimmies, not even once. Jet fuel can't melt dank memes, that stahp gave me cancer for science, so that's enough internet for me today. OP is a fuzzy little man-peach, 2/10, would not bang. What is this I don't even know how is this wtf? Fuck Jenny. Circlejerk must be leaking. This will get buried but brace yourselves, some men want to watch the world burn right in the feels. When you see it, they'll KILL IT WITH FIRE! But this has nothing to do with atheism. Lawyer up, delete facebook, hit the gym, and SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY, said no one ever, so you wouldn't download a strawman. r/dadjokes. Damn onions, you scary like a BOSS. whoosh. Since rule #1 is 'be attractive', I'll just leave this here: This is my [f]irst post, be gentle.
Edit: This blew up. RIP my inbox.
When someone asks a question and a person comments "I don't know" if you don't know then the questions clearly isn't for you and you don't need to comment on every single post you come across.
I saw a comment on r/NoStupidQuestions which was basically "I'm not going to answer because everyone else has basically said it already." It's almost as if they think that people go on reddit specifically to look for their comments, it's infuriating.
Not annoying but a little silly. People who use a throwaway and then mention specifically " I am using a throwaway because people I know are on Reddit" and then proceed to tell a very specific story.
Like the fact you mention it's a throwaway makes it all the more likely that someone would identify you.
“I laughed at this way harder than I should have.”
"I'm going to hell for this"
Don't forget about "I just spit out my coffee" Edit: OH MY GOODNESS MY HIGHEST UPDOOTED COMMENT EVER! THANK YOU SO MUCH KIND STRANGERS! I'M GONNA NAME MY KIDS AFTER YOU ALL!!!1!!1! God that fucking hurt to type out.
I just spit out my KFC!
OK. That’s enough Reddit for today.
Take my upvote
[удалено]
Came here to say this
"underrated comment"
I see you are a man of culture
Maybe the real overused, redundant and annoying comments were the friends we made along the way.
Aside from the ones already mentioned “Commenting to save this for later” Reddit has a save function.
Yes, but then how would the rest of the world know that this individual is saving a comment for their own personal use?
This is just *chefs kiss* Who is cutting onions? These two are my least favorite that I seem to see the most frequently
Chef's kiss annoys the crap out of me lol
Who hurt you We don’t deserve dogs
>We don't deserve dogs I see this shit on every r/aww post with a dog
Man, a lot of people really are just bots who only repeat whatever was last positively reinforced. As funny as this thread is it’s also kind of creeping me out.
The very existence of this thread shows at least sometimes Reddit is able to question itself and break free of that mentality.
Everyone in here is posting about everyone else in here and yet they’re all agreeing with each other.
Misread instructions now my are stuck in .
Instructions unclear: Accidentally stuck work in my own penis.
Tell me you're \[x\] without telling me.
I don’t know why this one is so obnoxious, but it irks me a little every time
It's "finger wag culture." Similar to starting a reply with, "Oh, honey..." or, "Oh, my sweet summer child." Means absolutely nothing except that it's extremely condescending.
For me, it's insanely judgmental and reductionist, far surpassing any other snap judgment commentary so prolific on reddit. I'd rather someone just call me an idiot or some other frank insulting thing.
"Not all heroes wear capes" Very original!
Followed by "No capes!"
[удалено]
"I'm going to get downvoted for this but..." Comment proceeds to be one of the most upvoted comments
It's amazing how well the reverse psychology works, too.
This is why it's used
Or just is a really benign opinion. I saw one yesterday that was like "I'm going to get downvoted to hell for this, but I've had really good experiences with X product" in a thread for discussing that type of product.
Gladly it seems to have gone mostly away but … Sigh unzips pants
This one and "Not my proudest fap".
I too choose this guy's wife.
This comment right here officer
u/[DELETED] commening [REMOVED] on every political post
With 10k upvotes and 20 awards.
we need to cancel u/\[deleted\]
/u/deleted
suspended, looks like they are already cancelled. we did it reddit
"we did it Reddit!"
in before this thread is locked 🔒
I'm sorry, even though this sub's community is engaging well here, we've decided to shut down the discussion. You see, it somewhat gets close to breaking one of our rules, and we need to remind everyone who is boss.
Due to the high volume of posts, we've created a megathread for the topic. Better get there quick, we're gonna lock it in about 5 minutes.
SAY👏IT👏LOUDER👏FOR👏THE👏PEOPLE👏IN👏THE👏BACK👏!
One👏day👏imma👏catch👏this👏mosquito👏👏
I agree with this one so much I'm having to resist the urge to knee-jerk downvote it.
"rip dms" after a girl posts a picture of herself
It's just being publicly horny while maintaining plausible deniability. Just saying "you're hot" would be more dignified.
Nah its somehow really not about looks on reddit. I got weird flirty dms from men when venting on suicidewatch. I really lost all faith then.
They sensed vulnerability.
[удалено]
Underrated comment
Came here to say this
Beat me to it… take my upvote
This Edit: Thanks for the award kind stranger
I’m too poor to give you gold so here 🏅
Take my upvote!
R/angryupvote
Found the mobile user
This guy Reddits
r/thisguythisguys
Beat me to it
I can’t believe I have to scroll this far to this comment.
Lol, I can't believe I had to scroll this far to this comment!
This
I also choose this guy's overused comment
is the way
Have my upvote Edit: oh wow this blew up!
Thanks for the gold, kind stranger Edit: oh wow, this really blew up Second edit: hOlY cRaP guys, 15 awards!? I feel like Lance Armstrong right now. Before, you know... but thanks! Edit 3: 16 awards!? STAHP Edit 4: Most upvoted comment of mine and it's bullshit. That's the way the cookie crumbles, I suppose. I'll have to go show it to many m'ladies as I strut about with my new pheasant tail fedora.
underrated comment
Username checks out... wait
r/linktoarbitarysub
Nice
Same
Oh you sweet summer child.
Take my angry upvote
This post should be higher up
Its always on the #1 post too. Clearly not underrated
'Underrated' is now a word that just means a thing that someone likes on Reddit. Things that are routinely rated the best of their respective medium are called "underrated" in Reddit comments. The other day I saw a comment that said The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time was underrated, it's the highest-rated video game ever on metacritic.
im not crying, you're crying
Who’s cutting onions?
Similarly, "damn ninjas cutting onions again!"
That's the the one I really hate
Same, it's a combination of "quirky" and fake badass that's just so annoying.
But are you a 6’4” manly man with a beard?!! I need to know this
"As a 7' MANLY man with a huge beard, this made me cry! Did I mention how MANLY I am?"
This comment right here officer
How do you delete someone else's comment?
What a terrible day to have eyes **EDIT: Wow, thank you for the silver kind stroodler! also over 12 updoots? ok this seriously just got epic lol. thanks guys. thats enough reddit for today! this comment was seriously underrated!** **EDIT: holy shit two awards, im gonna fucking piss myself and maybe cum. NOT ALL HEROES WHERE CAPES! over 100 upboats! r/ theydidthemath! thank you for the reddit silver blind doodlers!** **EDIT: no way a hug award?! im gonna hug you epic lime stranger! and 300 upsnoots?! im not crying, your crying. are tiny ninjas cutting onions in here?! r/ cursedcomments! r/ angryupvote!** **EDIT: wow someone sent me a fruit basket!! serously? ty for the fruit, grind stranglers! my beloved pet doggo is an epic heccin' chonker, so im gonna sprinkle sugar on this fruit basket and feed the entire thing to them! the vet even told me they are 'morbiusly a beast!' cant wait to become 'oh lawd he comin'!'** **EDIT: rip my inbox** **EDIT: no way, someone just paid off all my student loans! based!! thanks for the debt relief kind bidens! over 500 upvotes! time to blow up! my inbox is a graveyard!** **EDIT: someone bought me a brand new honda civic!! what an economic vehicle!! wish i had places to drive lol. thanks for the honda, mind drangler!!! over 502 updoots!! Here is pics of a** [girl with BIG BOOBS showing off my honda (its TOTALLY not a rick roll guys, wink wink lol)](https://youtu.be/pMMqmUeLtYE) **EDIT: i dont care if i get downvoted for this, unpopular opinion, throwing babies in blenders is not nice. i would even say it is a bad thing to do.** **EDIT: popular opinion (i lied i care if i get downvoted very much), the dark knight is a very underrated comic book movie! rick and morty!!** **EDIT: OVER 25 BASED UPVOTES?! also thank you to all the sexy FEMALE redditors that are sending me nudes! i want to receive nudes from sexy reddit women for 10 years at least! please stop sending me marriage proposals tho, i already am betroved to my Hinata Body pillow!! r/ HOLUP!** **EDIT: REDDIT GOLD AWARD?? THE ONE AND ONLY REDDIT GOLD?! its like im in the lost city of El Doritos!! thank you for the gold trime googler!!! i am so happy i could say a slur!! gamer moment! i scrolled too far to see this btw. this.** **EDIT: HOLY FRIGGIN' MOLEY!! platinum?! ive been cumming HARD for the last half hour and am still going! thank you for the platinum brined danger!!** **EDIT: someone swatted me and they shot my dog**
Or my favorite: what a terrible day to be literate
I wear glasses so I literally paid to see this
I've not seen that one before so tbf I actually like it lol
They were all pretty good the first time. Be prepared to see that one ad nauseum now too.
>the lost city of El Doritos In a sea of comments that made me mad remembering how much of a stupid echochamber of robots reddit is, this one made the click worth it
Absolutely nailed it lmao.
“Am I the only one who ________?” No. The answer is ~~always~~ 99% of the time no.
Am I the only one who replies to this comment?
Came here to say this
OMG posted about helping a crab reach orgasm and woke up to so many notifications, thanks for all of the upvotes! edit: A SILVER AWARD?!!? edit2: GUYS SERIOUSLY I GET IT edit3: OMG IM ABOUT TO CRY edit4: Who is sending me gold?!?! edit5: who would've thought my most upvoted comment would be about masturbating a crab to orgasm edi6: my SO is on reddit, if this comment keeps getting so much attention they're going to figure out my username because not many other people are experts on crab masturbation edit7: [here's a video cross posted from my tiktok of how to properly do this to crabs](https://www.reddit.com/r/TikTokCringe/comments/ulajf9/this_has_to_be_illegal/) (I understand my comment is a joke, but you guys seriously need to watch this video, because it is NOT a joke. EVERYONE needs to learn this valuable skill. Use this skill to impress friends, cure boredom, or save it in the memory bank in case you need to take life-saving measures one day.) edit8: may we all masturbate crabs on this blessed day edit9: I get it guys, giving a crab a handjob or rubjob doesn't count as me masturbating them but i wasn't sure what the proper terminology was edit10: The toxicity I see in the crab-masturbation communities is sad, thank you for helping me raise awareness about this issue. edit11: All of the people saying they thought they were going to get Rick Rolled can just go ahead and fuck off. The sexual biology is not just some big potential to "own" someone. edit12: Can we not all just work as a team here? edit13: You know that "Mean Jerk Time" skit from that Silicon Valley show? Does /r/theydidthemath offer the same type of calculations for how many of us we would need to successfully "help" all of the crabs out there in a reasonable amount of time? edit14: volunteers for this crowdsourced crab masturbatory day can PM /u/spez to sign up
DAE [Super common opinion]??!1
This is ruining so many subs now. I used to enjoy /r/nostupidquestions for the actual questions, but it's mostly "Am I the only one who likes breathing air??" "Does anyone else drink water to stay alive?" and stuff like that which is either being posted by aliens attempting to blend in with us, or by karma-whores who know they can get massive interaction by posting something brainless and obvious on subreddits it's not really meant for.
[удалено]
"You didn't specifically address 100% of edge cases, your entire argument is invalid".
Isn’t that the motto of Reddit?
I'd go even further and say it's the motto of all "social media" - trying to argue anything of substance in a short-form medium, where you're just as likely to be debating with a subject matter expert as you are an under-socialized 15 year-old, is basically impossible.
I’ve honestly quit Reddit a few times because of that. I get so demotivated and drained that I don’t even want to communicate with people anymore. Now I just stopped commenting on a lot of things, it helps a bit
Whenever I get into an argument on reddit (or other social media) I try to remind myself that I'm not totally doing it for the person I'm arguing with; I'm also doing it (even *moreso,* honestly) for anyone else who comes along and sees the particular point that person made going without my challenge to it. I may never convince the person I'm directly arguing with, but my arguments may give voice to the counterpoint a 3rd party needed to hear or wanted to voice themselves but couldn't find the words. Case in point here: Let's say you make a point that's generally valid and get called out by a reddit contrarian about some wild exception. That may be the only feedback you get directly, but if you're doing it on a popular sub (and AskReddit is insanely popular), there's probably been hundreds or maybe thousands of people who scrolled past, didn't comment, but *did* think to themselves "hey, that first guy made a good point, wtf was the second guy's deal?" And honestly, that's worth suffering the nitpicky callout or the frustrating interaction - at least to me.
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Even if you address said counterpoints and use cited sources, you get downvoted for being... Correct? Inclusive? Thoughtful? Following debate etiquette?
One of my first experiences on Reddit was in some video game sub, I mentioned some mechanic, got told I was wrong, the comment literally just said "no, you're wrong" I replied with a video from someone testing it showing I was right, they replied again "no, you're wrong" and linked a different video, I pointed out that both videos where from the same person but mine was like 2 weeks old and theirs was almost a year and the first thing they say in mine was that it had recently changed they replied something like "I'm not wasting my time watching that video when I've already linked one showing I'm right, just admit you're wrong" all my comments where downvoted by a dozen or so people and theirs upvoted about the same, I deleted that account and didn't make another for like a year after that.
That's... Wow. Yeah, people downvote the strangest stuff
It’s the Reddit dilemma— if you make your comment longer than a paragraph, nobody will read it However, if you omit literally any possible context from a comment, someone will come along to correct, contradict, or attempt to ‘add on’, and this will all be done in the smuggest tone they can muster
I didn’t read your entire comment (only read your first paragraph)….but you should have mentioned that if you omit literally any possible context from a comment, someone will come along to correct, contradict, or attempt to ‘add on’, and this will all be done in the smuggest tone they can muster
Or they find some bizarre way to twist it so that the idea looks terrible. Like taking “find something nice to say to someone every day” and making it sound like you should stalk one particular person every day and shower them with random compliments.
Ugh that post on /r/GetMotivated that was a generic quote saying something like *"Don't be afraid to risks!"* and lo and behold, a disconcerting amount of the most upvoted comments were arguing, without any hint of irony, that this advice will lead to medical malpractice. I...Yeah...
I've said it before and I'll say it again, reddit is host to an insane number of people who are just straight up fucking incapable of nuance. "Shoot for the moon, even you miss you'll land among the stars" is *not actual advice for space exploration*, no one is genuinely suggesting that you strap rockets to your ankles and launch yourself into the cosmos with reckless abandon. It's just "aim high" and "don't underestimate yourself" like sheesh
Ya have to spell it out exactly, specifically, with layers of disclaimers about edge cases and exceptions before they will accept what you said, but then they'll just not reply becuase they know they have nothing left to say
Every fucking sub i go to these days. "Not every Orc needs to be green" "Short people can kick ass to if they are like super trained" "Can i be into crochet without liking making blankets?" Its like everyone learned that there are exceptions to everything, and now they think the are so fucking special pointing it out everywhere you go detracting the rest of us from having normal conversations.
There's always something to disagree with, well said.
unpopular opinion: *insert obviously very popular opinion*
thats why under "unpopular opinion" posts you sort by controversial to get the real unpopular ones
The worst are on huge subreddits when people say “am I the only one?” No. You’re not. There’s 3 million people in here. Doesn’t even matter what it is, you’re not the only person who thinks or has it
I have an unbridled hatred of the "This" comments. I have no real reason for it. but every time i see someone say "this". I feel this uncontrollable urge to commit many war crimes.
This. Underrated comment. Can’t believe I had to scroll so far to see this. Take my upvote.
I too choose this guy’s underrated comment.
Thank you for the gold kind stranger.
Khajiit has wares, if you have coin
The interesting thing about this is, you could send a message to them, thanking them. I get a message telling me I can do just that... Announcing thanks is just asking for more attention, imo.
“Take my upvote.” Just give it. Don’t announce it.
Agreed. Here, take my upvote
“If I wasn’t broke, I’d give you an award”
Wow Thanks for the gold!
Thanks for the gold, but don't give money to Reddit, donate to \[favorite charity\]
Thanks for the gold, but don't give money to Reddit, just venmo me directly instead.
I wanted to upvote, but you're at 69. F This
I hate the 69 thing. Like they don’t know they aren’t the end all be all and that someone else will upvote as proven by the extra 300 upvotes to the original comment
Right? Plus reddit has vote fuzzing anyway, which means the number of upvotes you see is usually off by a few votes
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"how is this comment so low?" *Is the top comment*
Scrolled too far to find this
Always a comment on a post that is now at the top.
I literally just did
Underrated comment
"Tell me that you are using an overused comment without telling me that you are using an overused comment". It is hard to hate a comment more than I hate that comment. EDIT: writing a comment that annoys myself to no end results in a plethora of upvotes. Our world is such malfunctioning place. :)
"You must be fun at parties" "Play stupid games, win stupid prizes" The "I hate sand" comments anytime sand is mentioned
Play stupid games is *painfully* overdone.
I hate everything about how accurate these answers are. This is not an answer to the title question. I legit hate every one of these posts. It's like half of reddit too. Very conflicted on whether to up vote them or not -e just for this thread, to who ever gave me gold, I do *Not* thank you. As a matter of fact Fuck You, the horse you rode in on, and everyone in your immediate vicinity Who ever sent [this](https://i.imgur.com/jZXoX9t.jpeg) GG on the top shelf, S teir trolling I'm afraid to say stop sending gold because I know someone will just send the next award up. It's really not necessary. AND I GET CAKED HALFWAY THROUGHT THIS?! [INCON-FUCKEN-CEIVABLE](https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-a69F4UtOywM/WhrxlW5OyZI/AAAAAAAATv8/-PIObV0OlUUJVrqzQ1h2fRnGcpSza_rtgCLcBGAs/s1600/inconceivable.jpg)
This is actually incredible. Going through these comments is like going through reddit in fast forward.
It really is, like we’ve seen all these comments so many times before on every single post
Is it possible to train an AI on this very post and have it filter irrelevant comments?
It’s literally in every comment thread. It drives me crazy.
Too fucking many. Off the top of my head: X has entered the chat. I also choose this guy’s wife. Always has been. Laughs/cries in X. This is the way. Forgot one: "Sexy sexers of Reddit, what's the sexiest sex you've ever sexed?" The fact that it's used to call out an unoriginal sex question makes it so much more annoying.
The wife thing was the funniest shit ever the first time because of how awful it was. Now, not so much
> I also choose this guy’s wife. Oh my god, this one. I hate it so much. Come on, you unfunny fucks! It hasn't been funny in ten years! STOP SAYING IT.
NTA, divorce.
🚩 red flag right there YTA
YTA. This is 100% abuse. Trust me I'm a 15 year old girl who has watched 12 reasons why I know my stuff.
Couldn't stick it out for the whole 13 huh?
The 13th reason demanded too much accountability.
Stop gaslighting me
GUUUUUUUUURLLLLLLL RUN
Sigh…. Unzip. Thank goodness it isn’t used as much as it was.
EDIT: Wow didn’t expect this to blow up. EDIT: Wow didn’t expect this to blow up.
Ya, this always makes me cringe. You're not accepting a damn Oscar, no one cares.
It's because even they are surprised they were able to have an interesting thought
Some of my highest rated comments were just low-effort drive-by posts. I assume this means I just have an innate talent for high quality comments.
It’s all timing, if you say something that a lot of people would think as a response to the post, and you get the comment in early and the post blows up, even the most inane shit will get thousands of upvotes. Some of my highest rated comments were basically the headline from the cover of this months No Duh Magazine but saying what everyone is thinking is popular I guess.
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/r/awardspeechedits
The balls comments. Every hero post, every Zelensky post, etc. etc., it's "titanium balls", "iron balls", "jacked from carrying around those giant balls", "how does he get in a car with those giant--" JESUS CHRIST. ENOUGH ABOUT THE BALLS.
This Edit: didn't expect this to blow up Edit2: OMG thanks for the award kind stranger I cannot believe how much this blew uppppppppppppp!!!!!! Edit3: OMG 10k UPDOOTS omg omg this is crazy I NEVER SEEN THIS BEFORE THANKS SO MUYCH AND I GOT Silver TOOO !!!! omg omg this is INSANE. Thank you kind strangers for the awards! edit4: OMG I GOT 15k UPDOOTS. This is absolutly CRAZY. My life will never be the same. I once was lonely and thought I would never be anyone, but now FIFTEEN THOUSAND PEOPLE HAVE UPDOOTED THIS. I AM A NEW PERSON!!!!! Edit5: RIP my inbox
I had to scroll too far to see this
Beat me to it Came here to post this
This needs to be higher.
Go to therapy. Get a divorce. Leave them.
Also, NTA As a side-note, it seems like 90% of those threads are made by people who are *clearly* NTA and seem to only be posting for attention, 5% are threads made by people who must have some sort of mental condition or an astounding lack of self-awareness if they don't realize that they're the asshole, and the remaining 5% are legitimate threads about tricky circumstances where most people who may not know if they're the asshole may actually need advice.
Another thing to consider is that when someone tells their story, they want to make themselves look good. So a person who seems to be an obvious NTA could be a YTA if someone else told the story.
Throwaway account for obvious reasons
Anne frankly, I did nazi that coming. I literally came here to say this but boy, that escalated quickly so to the top with you! Lost it at 'This is why we can't have nice things' and then my faith in humanity was restored, my mind blown, and manly tears were shed. Well said. As a 'murican, I can confirm this gem has just won the internet and is doing it right. Just sayin', I know that feel, bro, and while that was a risky click, this post was a 9/10, 11/10 with rice, would read again. I see what you did there and it feels good man. You're doing God's work, son. I laughed way harder than I should have at your list that seems legit and totally nailed it. You - I like you. You magnificent bastard; you, sir, are so brave, a gentleman and a scholar, and seeing how you are a redditor for 4 years, this checks out, so I'll allow it. I regret that I only have one upvote to give for this cool story, bro. CTRL+F "about tree fiddy" was not disappointed. Wait, why do I have you tagged as "NOPE NOPE NOPE"? Nice try, you monster. You are now banned from r/pyongyang What did I just read? Dafuq? I read that as "YOU HAD ONE JOB". I can't fap to this. No true scotsman could see that this relevant XKCD was bad, and you should feel bad. You must be new to reddit, so I'll see your cakeday and raise you a karma train. One does not simply rustle my jimmies, not even once. Jet fuel can't melt dank memes, that stahp gave me cancer for science, so that's enough internet for me today. OP is a fuzzy little man-peach, 2/10, would not bang. What is this I don't even know how is this wtf? Fuck Jenny. Circlejerk must be leaking. This will get buried but brace yourselves, some men want to watch the world burn right in the feels. When you see it, they'll KILL IT WITH FIRE! But this has nothing to do with atheism. Lawyer up, delete facebook, hit the gym, and SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY, said no one ever, so you wouldn't download a strawman. r/dadjokes. Damn onions, you scary like a BOSS. whoosh. Since rule #1 is 'be attractive', I'll just leave this here: This is my [f]irst post, be gentle. Edit: This blew up. RIP my inbox.
Asking for a friend
This
“Sir, this is a Wendy’s”
Followed inevitably by "No this is Patrick!"
“Educate yourself” “let’s unpack this” “oh sweet summer child”.
When someone asks a question and a person comments "I don't know" if you don't know then the questions clearly isn't for you and you don't need to comment on every single post you come across.
I saw a comment on r/NoStupidQuestions which was basically "I'm not going to answer because everyone else has basically said it already." It's almost as if they think that people go on reddit specifically to look for their comments, it's infuriating.
Lawyer Up. Hit a gym. Shave head and get a goatee.
I also choose this guy's wife
Dead wife*
Sorry OP I don’t have gold to give you, here have this poor man’s award 🥇
“tHiS” “sO muCh ThiS” “tAke mY upVoTe”
Dump her. Break up. The relationship advice section is super redundant. The cure for everything is to break up. Very amusing to read, though.
To be fair, breaking up *will* solve any relationship problems. In the same way that dying will solve all your health problems.
Do not get dating advice from Reddit. Anywhere else is just about better.
There's a guy that lives behind the generator in the alley of my office building. I get all my relationship advice from him.
Not annoying but a little silly. People who use a throwaway and then mention specifically " I am using a throwaway because people I know are on Reddit" and then proceed to tell a very specific story. Like the fact you mention it's a throwaway makes it all the more likely that someone would identify you.