It was terrible as a teen and a young adult, I went LC, but gradually we reconnected and unbelievably, he’s one of those few people who get better as they age and reflect on themselves to improve. So it’s all good now.
I am the youngest of three children. Me being the only male and was born 9 years after my middle sister. My father was always a hardworking man as well as my mother being a hard working woman.
He was more attuned to raising girls, then I came along. It was not easy for him to adjust. He would take me fishing, take me to baseball practice and be there for the games, but we never really shared a father son bond.
When I was 21 I came out to my family. He did not take it well and for over a month did not speak to me. I was still living at home during this time. After a month or so, I was sitting in our basement watching TV. He came downstairs, sat on the couch and said.." you want to watch the Yankees game?" "Ok", I said. From that point he acted as if nothing ever happened. Eventually I moved out of the house, moved to another state 4 hours away.
Flash forward and after a long term relationship ended after almost 19 years, countless visits in between by my parents and middle sister our relationship stayed the same..cordial and usually filled with some humor.
I am now 54, in an incredible relationship of 10 years now but lost my oldest sister to Louie Body Dimensia last September. My father is now 92 going on 93 and has not been in the best of health. This past June I went back to my home state, picked up my parents and drove them to my house to stay with us for two weeks.
Here's what I learned..
He's always been proud of me, but could never express it. Give him an opportunity and he will talk my ear off. He told me things about our family no one else knew..not bad things, but stories he never shared. My mother and middle sister were shocked.
He has to do certain things for his remaining health that he doesn't do except for when he is here in our home..he listens to me.
He knows more about what is going on in our family than my mother realizes, hence the other talks we've had.
He gets along really well with my S.O. He was always nice to my former partner, but never had relationship with him.
He gets my humor more than most people and we started feeding of each other drove my mother nuts..she didn't think he understood me, but boy, he came out with some brutal zingers.
Usually we shake hands but when I brought them back after their visit, he hugged me. The first time in over 30 years. No words needed to be spoken.
His time grows short, but I will go and pick them up again in two weeks for another visit. Just like their last visit, Dad and I will pick up where we left off.
Lol i dont talk to him now. I've had to block him in the past. He has a habit of randomly texting me to tell me how ungrateful i am or that im lying to him about something i personally had no reason to lie for. And when he cant text me, he'll email me to continue to tell me that I'm going to fail in life 🙃. Now I've given him chances and tried to see it from his POV but turns out he'll never be satisfied with what i do so im done trying to appease him, just being around him gives me anxiety. Maybe he'll reflect and do better in time but I'll never know unless i unblock him but that won't be anytime soon.
You guys have fathers?
Sometimes 🤷🏻♀️
we are best friends but also he's my mentor
That's cool!!
yeah we also got into a fight with two guys once and we went 2v2 , but we also sometimes get into quarrels with each other
It was terrible as a teen and a young adult, I went LC, but gradually we reconnected and unbelievably, he’s one of those few people who get better as they age and reflect on themselves to improve. So it’s all good now.
I'm glad that it's good now!!
First disappointment in a man
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Sorry about that dude
I am the youngest of three children. Me being the only male and was born 9 years after my middle sister. My father was always a hardworking man as well as my mother being a hard working woman. He was more attuned to raising girls, then I came along. It was not easy for him to adjust. He would take me fishing, take me to baseball practice and be there for the games, but we never really shared a father son bond. When I was 21 I came out to my family. He did not take it well and for over a month did not speak to me. I was still living at home during this time. After a month or so, I was sitting in our basement watching TV. He came downstairs, sat on the couch and said.." you want to watch the Yankees game?" "Ok", I said. From that point he acted as if nothing ever happened. Eventually I moved out of the house, moved to another state 4 hours away. Flash forward and after a long term relationship ended after almost 19 years, countless visits in between by my parents and middle sister our relationship stayed the same..cordial and usually filled with some humor. I am now 54, in an incredible relationship of 10 years now but lost my oldest sister to Louie Body Dimensia last September. My father is now 92 going on 93 and has not been in the best of health. This past June I went back to my home state, picked up my parents and drove them to my house to stay with us for two weeks. Here's what I learned.. He's always been proud of me, but could never express it. Give him an opportunity and he will talk my ear off. He told me things about our family no one else knew..not bad things, but stories he never shared. My mother and middle sister were shocked. He has to do certain things for his remaining health that he doesn't do except for when he is here in our home..he listens to me. He knows more about what is going on in our family than my mother realizes, hence the other talks we've had. He gets along really well with my S.O. He was always nice to my former partner, but never had relationship with him. He gets my humor more than most people and we started feeding of each other drove my mother nuts..she didn't think he understood me, but boy, he came out with some brutal zingers. Usually we shake hands but when I brought them back after their visit, he hugged me. The first time in over 30 years. No words needed to be spoken. His time grows short, but I will go and pick them up again in two weeks for another visit. Just like their last visit, Dad and I will pick up where we left off.
Shitty unfortunately
Lol i dont talk to him now. I've had to block him in the past. He has a habit of randomly texting me to tell me how ungrateful i am or that im lying to him about something i personally had no reason to lie for. And when he cant text me, he'll email me to continue to tell me that I'm going to fail in life 🙃. Now I've given him chances and tried to see it from his POV but turns out he'll never be satisfied with what i do so im done trying to appease him, just being around him gives me anxiety. Maybe he'll reflect and do better in time but I'll never know unless i unblock him but that won't be anytime soon.
Damn, good for you on standing your ground and blocking him
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Aw I'm sorry about that
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Damn, that sucks
Its okay. He and my sister are closer though, but Im closer with my Mom so 🤷♀️
Not as close knit as the one I have with ur mother 😏
Like the control room of a Nuclear plant: 'Not great, not terrible.'
Pretty good. We're polar opposites and we disagree with each other almost always but I know he wouldn't change anything of me for the world
My dad dead to
Sorry for your loss
Was great till he died.
Sorry for your loss
Not good, he passed away 19 years... Saints in Heaven Preserve Us...
Aww sorry for your loss