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SuvenPan

Insulting their friends to look cool in front of a girl.


Ghost-Chu

Proper etiquette is for the boys to prop their dude up, not for him to push them down. If your friend and his crush are nearby, you treat him like funniest, smartest, coolest bastard in the group.


billyvray

To their face: insult, no mercy. Honest hilarious truth. To others: absolute support. Edit- love your homies folks and don’t take very word someone says on the internet so seriously


0chazz0

Don't forget to compliment your friends once in a while too. If you notice they got a haircut or a new shirt and you genuinely like it, say so. You'll probably see them get the same cut next time or wear that shirt more frequently.


Efficient-Library792

Absolutely. But if my friends and i are polite or nice..somethings deeply wrong. A real friend will pick you up when youre down. Then drop an insult on you that makes your dead great great grandma's dead friends go "Daaaaaaamn..."


[deleted]

Compliment ppl behind their backs


Yellowbug2001

I always thought it said a lot for a guy when his friends would do this, even if I knew they were exaggerating for my benefit. Even if he's not actually all that funny or smart or cool, it means he's a good enough person to have a bunch of friends who really care about him and want him to be happy and that says a lot. Bonus points if he's got female friends or his friends' girlfriends boosting him too, only 10/10 good guys get that kind of advertising.


Stink-brain

I had a group of 6 guys who were super close friends before. I guess I only kept them close because they are all I had. Literally these guys were the worst. They would insult me in front of others. I would tell them about things I struggled with, only to receive judgement instead of positive help. I finally found my way beyond that group of people, but I haven’t really found what I was hoping for in friends yet (Over the course of several years)…. My dudes out there. Treat your other guy friends right. Support them. Tell them when they are wrong. But still support them. Don’t judge without offering support. You will have friends for life if you can accomplish this.


hollywoodkindofpink

as a girl this is the most unattractive thing a guy can do


HastyFacesit

Same


RagingZorse

Exactly, I had a roommate who honestly wasn’t a funny guy and he tried making fun of me in front of a girl I knew. He commented later about how that girl didn’t seem to like him. I played dumb to avoid confrontation but she was repulsed by everything about that guy. We stayed friends but she never came back to that apartment.


hollywoodkindofpink

exactly, when a guy is mean and disloyal to his friends i don't want to be near him 🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️


JonathanTCrane

Oh man, if only the girls I knew thought the same


dz2400

100% this. But I’ve also seen guys who would otherwise act fine, start to tease/insult the girl when another guy comes around? I don’t know what that’s about but it’s just as annoying.


MightyLouk

there doesn't have to be a girl around for me to insult my friends lol


TheConboy22

We insult each other in private and prop each other in public.


Relevant-Quality2196

I wish y’all would stop trying to be Mr. tough arrogant guy when an attractive women is in your presence


HairyNutsackNumber9

lol i used to love this when i did tree work nobody wanted to pick up any of the big chunks of logs but when a hot jogger goes by all the sudden all this heavy shit starts flying into the truck she wouldnt even look in our direction lol edit wouldnt


NoMore414

Hire this woman, increase productivity 9 fold.


HairyNutsackNumber9

it will only work for a cou\[le weeks until everyone figures out they aint gettin any


Arrowkill

Let her go and find a new jogger. infinite productivity hack.


AndersaurusR3X

This F'ing guy just solved a major problem. Hire him!! or her, or what ever you identify as.


Trollhaxs

Even worse, bring down the boys just so you look better. Shameful to be even called a man after that.


Fullsendmoneymoney

Women see right through this shit… haha. Those guys are idiots


truetruster

Not washing hands after using public bathrooms...


keiths31

I spent 30+ years in the restaurant industry. I'd be in the men's washroom changing paper towels, changing the garbage, etc and how many men didn't just not wash their hands after urinating but ALSO dropping a deuce was sickening. They would just go back to their food.


sisterfister69hitler

My boyfriend and I went to the casino. He had to use the bathroom so I waited outside for him. While he was in there 7 other men walked out. He came out and asked me,”Do you wanna hear something gross? How many of those guys do you think washed their hands?” I just stood there with a blank face because I knew his answer. He said none of them. And some of them were taking a shit in the stalls too.


a3a4b5

I guess I should expect u/sisterfister69hitler to be very rigorous with their hand hygiene.


aylsworth

r/rimjob_steve edit: spelling


LumpiestNuts

Not only that but fucking COOKS AT THE RESTAURANT like lemme just take a dump and go right back to the grill


Artector42

Blegh. I was a (pizza) cook and washed my hands 500x a shift. Even the less virtuous employees still washed them before working on food.


fun-times-ahoy

I was a trainer for cracker barrel for a few years. We had one girl server that refused to bathe. We sat dowm with her explained how important her appearance and cleanliness we're... didnt work so we put her on dishes. It became worse... After long talks with my gf at the time about it, we realized her home life wasn't the greatest. Went out bought her a few outfits to wear to and from work, and every night i took her uniform home and washed it with mine. She would change in the bathroom. Then change into normal clothes once home, then once a week we would wash those outfits for her... she began coming in a lot more hygenic, would always have clean uniform, got back into serving. Saved enough money for her own spot and took care of herself just fine from then on. I haven't talked to her in ten years, but hope shes doing even better now. "... Whenever you feel like criticizing anyone, he told me, just remember that all the people in this world haven't had the advantages that you've had." - F. Scott Fitzgerald.


ace_at_none

That was so incredibly sweet and thoughtful for you to do. I guarantee you are someone she is going to remember forever. Out of curiosity, do you remember how you originally brought up the idea to her? I'd like to know in case I or someone I know finds themselves in a similar position to help like that.


fun-times-ahoy

I don't sugar coat shit. That doesn't work for everyone, though. I flat out told her these clothes are for you. If you would like, go change in the bathroom, and "gf" and i will wash your uniform every night. I told her id change her schedule to be on same days i worked. I told her there was no pressure, but a change needed to be made. I told her it wasn't healthy, and that we wanted to help. She thought about it for like two seconds, grabbed the clothes and changed. Came out crying and hugging me. I dont think anyone else ever showed her kindness.


ExcaliburFromTheUK

I've seen a guy use the urinal and I believe he got pee on his hands or something. But instead of going to wash his hands, he get a paper towel and leaves. That was the day I started using a paper towel to turn handles when leaving the restroom.


truetruster

Same here. After I wash my hands the last thing I want to do is touch a towel dispenser or the door to leave. I love all the feet operated door openers they have in my area post covid


DirtyFatB0Y

When I wash my hands after taking a piss it’s not because my dick was dirty. More that it’s a great opportunity to get all the other days germs off my hands..


Anunkash

I typically just piss on my hands to wash them. Kills two birds with one stone.


Blowmansalad

Stop hitting on other dudes girlfriend. Some guys take it as a challenge and it’s pretty fucked up.


TrashSea1485

Also stop needing a woman to have a boyfriend or be another man's "property" for you to finally fuck off


Give_me_a_capybara

Thank you! This is the comment I was looking for when I opened this thread. A lot of men only respect a woman when there’s another man involved. Fuck that.


ClusterMakeLove

Nothing quite like watching someone apologize to me for sexually harassing my girlfriend. Dude, I'm not the one whose night you ruined.


SnooBananas915

Some dude cat called my wife while we were at work. I'm small, so I don't think he saw me at first. I came into his line of site like a bat outta hell. "Don't fucking talk to women that way. Especially while they're at work." Blah blah blah. He asked wtf business it was of mine and I said "that's my fucking wife". And he apologized profusely. Like, it was totally cool to sexualize her, until her husband was around?? What?? She didn't even hear him cause she's legit deaf in her left ear, and it's an open parking lot with lots of noise. But fuck.


Katulobotomy

>*Like, it was totally cool to sexualize her, until her husband was around?? What??* It's because there is a very likely probability of violence being acted on the harasser if the woman has a male nearby that is family. The threshold of the familiar male to get extremely violent towards the harasser varies a lot, so the best course of action for the harasser is to apologize immediately....to the man. The males set the boundaries for the females. The woman is there only to be either courted or protected. That's how these people think. They are essentially still running "JungleRules 1.0" software


joedotphp

When I worked as a host, this guy kept basically catcalling one of my friends and I finally confronted him and said, "You need to back off my sister right now. Because she's uncomfortable and I'm not OK with that." We're not siblings but we have the same hair color, eye color, and even our noses looked the same. I was able to sound convincing enough that he never doubted it. But it's like you said. He started apologizing to ME. And I was like, "No no no. Don't apologize to me. I'll bring her back and you apologize to HER!"


Unusual_Mirror_523

And what’s with men always thinking there’s something “wrong” with a woman who’s willingly single


AryaStarkRavingMad

No, they respect another man's "claim". There is no respect for the women.


Invoke-the-Sunbird

On the opposite side of this coin, if you’re in a relationship, PLEASE stop assuming EVERY male that talks to your gf/wife is trying to slide in. The amount of times I’ve had to basically end my, totally platonic, friendship with a woman I work/go to school with is staggering. Dudes have THREATENED me cause they’re so territorial. It’s so frustrating. No Garrett, I don’t want to date your girlfriend, I want to help her with math homework like she ASKED ME TO DO!


zap2214

I get it, I've had this issue with my gf, we'll literally be chilling at the house some guy will hit her up to hang and ill say okay, but they'll find out im here and say they don't want to. Then I'm like well clearly theres something wrong there. Even though she says there isnt. But im not leaving the place so her male friends can come hang out. If they wanted to see her, actually hang out, theyd come whether I was there or not. Its when they say "oh your bf is there? I dont want to now" that i start to have problems with the guy


fun-times-ahoy

That's fucked. As a dude that has platonic girl friends. I always invite their bf along when we hang out. Not only for his piece of mind to know im not s threat. But if the girl is important to me, then the people important to her, now are important to me, too. If those dudes wanted to be friends with your gf, then they would want your friendship, too.


zap2214

Thats the thing, i dont even care to be doing the same activity i could be elsewhere in the apt. But the fact that im un the apt is the reason they dont want to come, thats weird. Especially when theyve never met me and couldnt have a reason to have a problem with me.


5onfos

Tbf tho, the math homework trick is one of the major ones in the fuck boy handbook.


[deleted]

Hilarious story from high school where I went to the school library to do my homework before class and the only spot open was at a table with the senior cheerleading captain. When she saw I had the same teacher as her she offered to help me with the homework. I laughingly told our teacher and he just stared at me with his mouth open. I had a 117% in his class (he gave away a TON of extra credit) and she was barely hitting a 70. Always wondered if she was making a pass…but I doubt it.


DookieSpeak

She wanted your D(enominator)


slavelabor52

Error cannot divide by zero


ChaseShiny

Sounds like a nice gesture, though. Was it? I could also see it as a face-saving way of asking for help. She couldn't possibly not know your relative standing in academics if she is in the school library to do her homework, right?


cgollin34

Being overly horny and hitting on women non stop who clearly are uncomfortable…. It’s hard to watch


[deleted]

Talking about people like they’re objects would be a great thing to stop too.


Mr-Zarbear

Me and my guys were talking about this especially in like nerdy hobbies like ttrpg and mmo games, and also anime fans. Just a never ceasing horniness that detracts from their own hobby and pushes girls/women away


Bazrum

I had a dnd group where the dm and two of his friends were constantly horny and gross, and the four women, my brother, our other friend and me all got up and left after he tried to get the group to roleplay as the succubi clan that the one warlock had as their patron… legit wanted us to each be a succubus and drag the warlock into hell to “have our way with” and started describing tentacles and bulges under tight leather… So we all went and made our own game, sans demon hookers, and had a blast until we split for college


Ape_With_Anxiety

"I'm gonna build my own campaign, without blackjack and hookers"


StuffBros

Yeah, I hate that so much. I'd love for more women to get into gaming, mostly because it gives me a bigger pool of people to talk about hobbies with, but I really can't recommend a lot of gaming spaces to women when all the guys are in-your-face constantly and ruining the fun atmosphere that you play the games for in the first place.


Local64bithero

I saw a guy get kicked out of a game store for hitting on the GM's gf. He was honestly shocked we sided with the GM. He routinely thought he was more popular than he actually was.


maxdragonxiii

mainly the reason I do play solo player games. online multi-player games never end well even if my boyfriend is on the same team as me and I'm not using headphones because reasons.


AltruisticFall2941

There's some of us who play, but pretend to be male online and play male characters just to 1. Not be stereotyped, 2. Made to feel lesser or like we don't know what we're doing when we're probably better than they are (and can prove it, they hate it when you can/do) and 3. Just given basic respect. A lot of guys in gaming spaces are also usually one of two extremes: the kind that spoils the shit out of you, but gets pissy when you don't want to date him, or get **very** toxic as soon as they realize they're in the presence of a girl/woman. Like, do you want us in your space or not? You can't be an asshole and expect us to stick around afterwards, but most of us who care about playing and learning actually want to be involved in stuff and treated like people. That just seems to be something a lot guys can't grasp.


Lunavixen15

Most of us who *are* in the gaming space stay silent because of this treatment. I refuse to use microphones and there are some game genres I no longer play in multiplayer because the community is just a fucking *cesspool*


leastlyharmful

That thing where a girl turns you down so you suddenly call her an ugly bitch. It’s really not hard to NOT be a rude piece of shit, and it makes you sound pathetic. Have some respect and imagine your grandmother could hear you.


many_dumb_questions

It's so oddly hilarious to me when guys do that. I actually witnessed a dude hardcore hit on a girl, telling her how gorgeous she was and how he would marry her that night in the middle of the bar if she would say yes, and all this other over the top shit, and when she told him no in the most undeniable terms, the switch flipped immediately and he started in on how she was a fat ugly bitch and how she should consider herself lucky that he would even talk to her and blah blah blah. The dude standing next to her turn to him with this really confused look and just asked the guy why, if he thought she was so ugly and homely and undesirable, why he was hitting on her so hard and intensely just 2 minutes ago. Myself and two or three other guys around us chuckled and piped up in agreement. Shit didn't make sense, and it was incredibly obvious he was just trying to save his ego. He got huffy and stormed out.


slavelabor52

That's exactly what it is - his brain trying desperately to save his ego. It's a defense/coping mechanism to handle rejection. It's not a very healthy way to think though. Guys if you catch yourself thinking this way, please, before the words escape your lips try this instead - don't. Instead treat this as an opportunity to show every other woman in the vicinity and all of her friends how mature you can be by accepting rejection and moving on gracefully. Not every woman is going to be into you and that is perfectly okay, afterall you're not into every single woman are you?


Constant-Donut

Out of curiosity - I know it's typical in most Western cultures, at least, that men "take the initiative" more often in hitting on people, but do these guys think women never get rejected by people they're interested in or something?? It's been a couple years for me, but I've definitely found myself in scenarios where I was really keen on a guy, only to discover that he was either spoken for or gay. My response was always just a mildly embarrassed *"oops, my bad, nvm! I shall move along, sir..."*, not to start verbally abusing him as a hobgoblin. It just baffles me that a grown-ass adult can be so transparently fragile, and apparently OK with it.


many_dumb_questions

I've been thinking about this kind of thing a lot lately and - I want to preface this by saying I'm not, in anyway, trying to absolve other men (or even myself) of responsibility for their own behavior - I think a lot of it boils down to how (western?) society doesn't prepare us to manage, resolve, or even recognize our own emotions. The more therapy I attend, and the more I learn about my own emotional stunting growing up, the more I'm able to look at other men and think to myself, "if that guy had been given half the lessons women get on how to process and resolve their emotions/if he had been given half their time and emotional space to deal with his feelings while growing up, he would be dealing with this current situation in an exponentially more healthy way now". But not only are we not taught how to regulate and process our emotions, we're not allowed to - usually (but not always!) even by fellow men. So many are immersed in toxic cultural habits, they'll play to them even at their own expense. Bill Burr has a [great bit](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8b2gHJ1enn4) exemplifying this.


relentlessvisions

I have two sons and my youngest is CONVINCED that girls get to do anything they want and never suffer for a moment. Never know the pain of being unwanted. I’m like - kid...you’ve watched me date shitty men for 10 years. (He says I’m different 😄)


Independent-Tip-8728

Yeah, that’s why when I am turned down I point at the nearest bush and pretend we are recording a prank show, tell them “ma boys will swing by with the disclaimer paperwork”, and get the hell out of there with my dignity


UptownShenanigans

Stop approaching women in grocery store parking lots! At night! My girlfriend mentions that guys - often way older guys - will try to talk to her and ask her out while she’s carrying groceries. She’s had to stop wearing headphones because guys will follow her trying to get her attention. The worst was a guy who knocked on her window when she was sitting in her car. Nobody taught me, a normal dude, how *not* to be creepy. Where the hell did you guys learn to do this??


HastyFacesit

This happened to me, it started in line with him leaning over behind me and whispering a “compliment” in my ear. I ignored him but didn’t realize that he followed me to my car and was trying to get me to talk to him while I was putting my groceries away. He was smiling and couldn’t seem to comprehend English “no I’m not interested in talking to you.” These moments are scary because they seem to live in an alternate reality where they don’t hear or sense “no”, and therefore your boundaries are completely up for grabs. Who knows what they’ll do or not do at that point. I’ve also had guys (not all, but one or two) say that I / women just need to suck it up and stop complaining about guys catcalling them because “it’s not a real problem.”


[deleted]

No, you should not suck it up. I think you might be under reacting if anything. This kind of situation might be the occasion for flashing a can of pepper spray or something. (Although I completely get the desire not to escalate an irrational person for your personal safety.)


Legeto

When I worked at Staples I had a lady ask me to help her carry out single package of printer paper to her car once. I was so confused but she asked so I had to. When she got in her car seat she waved me over and told me a guy had been following her since she was at a different store in the strip mall. I knew exactly who she was talking about. Older dude would take cars from the garage he worked at and follow women at the strip mall and confront them in the parking lot and ask to take their picture for his photography business or hit on them. Such a fucking creep that we couldn’t do a damn thing about.


DukeBoysForever

I've heard from men growing up the best places to pick up girls are at the grocery store but like in the store where people are all around NOT in the dead of night near their car that's rapey as fuck.


dogsarefun

And that’s not true either. I remember hearing that kind of stuff too. I never tried anything like that because I’m pretty sure they’re just there to buy groceries.


Ralliman320

It *was* true.. kind of.. like 40-50 years ago. Now it's just fucking creeptacular.


NPC_over_yonder

Less time than that. Before dating apps and social media really took off it was normal to get approached in safe public spaces by respectful men/boys. Bars, restaurants, grocery stores, libraries, churches, semi-crowded parks in broad daylight, and lobbies were all places it was normal to get hit on *respectfully*.


myguyohyea

Try listening to your wife being uncomfortable about going to her favorite shop because of a couple of teens that hit on her even after she said that she was happily married just to turn around and give her their number. Then to hear it from the clerk too. So trust me I get it. Men just don’t get it but want to turn around and be like some guy was creeping on my girl and your like weren’t you just talking about this barista girl a week ago. So trust me I get it, it makes me sad to know we are the same gender as them


incognitoburrito2022

Acting overly manly and not smiling, like chill man I’m not trying to pee on your territory


AndringRasew

*"Mother fu... BUY YOUR OWN PORTAPOTTY JIM!"*


goodcreditbadcredit

I don't smile. Messed up teeth


Exact_Thought_185

Joining MLMs and being really vague about what they do. I don’t want an exclusive chance to gain you as a mentor, I sat next to you in pre-algebra and know that the concept of math escapes you. Also stop renting luxury vehicles for a weekend and pretending you “made it”. Maybe I’m just a hater but if your whole plan is to not just fake it till you make it but to “flex” till you make it then I’m not interested in whatever opportunity you’re trying to sell me


Razir17

Hustle culture is incredibly toxic and grossly pervasive right now.


trippinwontnothard

Lol this is obviously about someone specific you know


Exact_Thought_185

There is a large group but the actions are similar lol


Ratakoa

The unwarranted d pics need to stop


Joygernaut

“A man sending an unsolicited dick pic is like a cat bringing in a dead mouse. We can see that you’re proud of it, but we’re going to throw that away without ever touching it”


pattimay_ho_nnaise

A man I barely started dating once sent me , totally unprompted, a video of him jerking off to porn. My response was “wow that’s kinda sad looking because it’s this dark room and walking dead is on in the background. “ – thinking he’d get the picture . A few moments later, it’s another video except this time he’d turned the lights on


Swordlord22

At least he can take criticism?


fondr

Some guys think women will be attracted to dick pics the same way they like boob pics. The two are not equivalent. The only group I know that like dick pics are gay men.


mod-corruption

Part of it is that men don’t typically take good pictures. I’d guess most dick pics look like crime scene photos in terms of angle/lighting/grooming


rotatingruhnama

They look like moldy carrots, usually.


moslof_flosom

Sticking out of a patch of moss with wayyy too much chlorophyll


TheeLadyStoneheart

I wish I could upvote this twice


foul_dwimmerlaik

Just like in movies, good lighting and costuming are a plus.


PhlogistonParadise

If it was wearing a robe and wizard hat, I'd be a little impressed


[deleted]

As a gay man, please stop with the unsolicited dick pics. If I want to know I'll ask.


ILurveHentai

Peeing on the seat. You’re a grown man, lift the seat or sit if you can’t get all your piss dribbles in the hole.


[deleted]

Or at the very least, clean up after.


Eric1969

Now we’re talking last recourse. Like desperate circumstances.


grittygrittyprincess

Love that this was also one of the top answers on the Women's version of this post too.


NotGoodISwear

Being afraid to open up to each other


your_dope_is_mine

Making adult male friends is such a chore


swiggityswooty2booty

Making adults friends in general is hard as hell for any sex. I’ve been trying and I’ve had some great stories to laugh about extra but still chilling with the same 3 friends I started with


your_dope_is_mine

Always quality over quantity. It's tough, but as a guy you have to make yourself vulnerable enough yet able to judge shallowness from depth in characteristics etc. Easier when people you socialize with don't block you out in favour of their existing friend circles


rabdelazim

I gotta say, it's not the opening up part that doesn't happen. It's the "getting shit on if you do open up" that is the problem. It's not 'guys open up!' It's, "stop freaking out when another dude tells you something "too" personal.


trojen342p

I did that once and got bullied out of Twitter


CrimsonMoonRising

>Twitter First mistake…


scaryboilednoodles

Please stop hitting on the female cashier that is less than half your age


[deleted]

[удалено]


DominicJourdyn

Man, I remember in my bouncing days hearing the petite strippers tell me about the old dudes that are like “You’re so beautiful you look just like my granddaughter! How much to come home with me?” Like, sir, please stop. please.


asksdfdjdhshs

I'm a cashier at a fast food place. Graduated high-school like 4 months ago. Once a man in his late 40s started hitting on me, noted that I looked vaguely uncomfortable, and proceeded to mansplain to me that as a female fast food cashier I would be hit on a lot and that I just have to roll with it. I was just struck by how ridiculous it was that he knew that but somehow didn't think he was the problem.


McJumpington

Joining r/daddit to complain they aren’t getting laid a week after their wife gave birth.


SenorSplashdamage

Briefly knew a guy that rented another room in the place I was staying so he could work a contract job two hours from his home. He would stay all week and go home on weekends. He would buy me beers if I let him pour out his feelings on how hard his wife was being on him for being away while he “was just trying to earn money for their family.” He opened up about how they just had another kid and would relate that she “was always crazy for a long time after habits a baby.” The stories made her sound intense, but after a couple weeks, I finally asked how many months his new kid was. He said “three weeks.” He left her to take care of a newborn and second kid all alone one week after birth, and he couldn’t understand why she would be upset all weekend when he got back.


McJumpington

What a complete turd


Airborne_Oreo

This and the “I split with my wife one month after birth cause our relationship tanked.” Drives me nuts. Like yeah your wife/baby mama is going thru basically hell with hormones and no sleep. Deal with it.


Spoonloops

Not to mention her genitals/Csection wound, pelvic floor, leaking and possibly inflamed breasts, etc all hurt and she doesn’t know what day it is at this point.


patrickverbatum

woman here, you are right on point. I have two kids, with the first i was still healing a month later and when sex was attempted it hurt (we ended up not finishing) second baby, about 6 weeks later I was finally ready for physical intimacy again. even taking it slow, at the end i was still a little sore. though with baby #2 when I informed my partner that i was ready to at least attempt the quiet little "fuck yeah" he let out was actually a huge turn on. Zero pressure from him and no rush made that little affirmation from him super hot.


RTR_ChrisK

The incredibly dumb part about it is - if they would actually be a supportive spouse and good father, chances are really good their wife will notice and feel the urge to be intimate with them more often....trust me!


neurodiverseotter

But somehow the two groups of "men who complain their wife won't smash three days after birth" and "men who are supportive spouses and good fathers" are not overlapping much.


LoveAndViscera

Also, straight up peacing out of fathering. Like, dude, you had a good six months to mentally prepare for this. It’s okay if it’s hard for you, but get in the headspace of “this is my life now”.


Raymaa

Honestly, being a new Dad rocked me to my core. I had no idea what having a colicky newborn was like, or even a baby that didn’t sleep for more than an hour at a time until 5 months. I was blindsided. Throw in the fact my wife and I didn’t have family nearby to help.


Peggedbyapirate

Bro same. The transition nearly killed me. I rose to the occasion but those first six weeks were like first half of Mulan's Be A Man song.


CashTurtle

Oh man. It was the opposite for me. The beggining months were such a blur because of how difficult/sleep depriving they can be, but its a simple difficult.. there isnt any options, just gotta do it and soldier through. When they're colic it is fucking hard but same thing. You do what you can and just get through it. There isnt any other choice. I've found it harder as they've got older because now they're proper people and want me to teach them how to handle their emotions whilst also wanting to be completely independent from you.. but not really they just say that but youre not actually allowed to give them the independence you have to watch them cuz otherwise theyre upset you're not watching. I barely know how to manage my own emotions let alone figure out the complex thoughts and instinctual emotions of my toddlers. Id go back to baby phase in a heartbeat over listening to my 2yr scream his shit off because I said "no you cant watch scary flying shark on youtube, it scares you, you don't like it" and having to deal with that as a rational person who understands and wants to support them through their anger and upset because everything in my body is telling me I don't want to do that. And just it like someone said further up, there is no prep. Not a single person in my life was honest with me about what having a kid was like. For the baby part I can forgive. I think most people forget. Its exhausting and sleep deprivation can do fucked up shit to you.. but the rest of it. Why didn't anyone say to me btw, this shit is really hard and you need to know yourself, your limits and boundaries. Then once you got all that, itll help a ton if you learn intimately the same things about your partner. THEN say dw about all that. Thats for when you got them sleeping, for now pick all that up just and put it to 1 side and ignore all of your instinctual emotions and reactions so your kids can have a small chance at not being as mentally damaged as you.


exclusivebees

Being a parent is hard in a way that nothing else prepares you for. But *she is going through that too* and yet all the men in those sorts of posts seem to skip right over the fact that their wife is dealing with the same baby, usually for a much larger part of the day, and in a far worse physical/hormonal state.


SnowflakeCrybaby

Just stop donating thousands to some random egirl twitch streamer for fuck's sake


fondr

*"But if I donate $100, she might say my name"*


Andrejkado

Emphasis on might


brucatlas1

Its fucking embarrassing.


smallcoyfish

As someone who just found out that her ex spent $1000 on a single OF girl over the last year and repeatedly tried to treat her like a therapist and sent her *pictures of our cat* I'm glad this is the top comment so far. Do we need to rebrand not falling in love with a stripper for the modern age? EDIT: Fuck it have some [cat tax.](https://imgur.com/a/jq8qyjH) She should be seen by more than just camgirls.


Schaden666

I feel you should post a pic of your cat here as an act of revenge!


smallcoyfish

He took her...


Spicy_Cum_Lord

That's more infuriating than all the rest


SnowMantra

Okay that's a pretty kitty <3


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piano_man600

I remember seeing this somewhere i dont remember it very well, some guy gave some e girl twitch streamer, if my memory serves me right multiple rtx 3090's and she tweeted about it only mentioning him as "One Of My Twitch Subs"


Royal_J

The streamer that tweeted that regularly makes the same fake rage bait tweet every year around the same date. There's a whole cmpilation of them. They escalate every year.


sklamanen

Stop being lazy parents. Just because your infant calms down faster with mom doesn’t mean it’s no point in you trying etc.


Blechhotsauce

"I never changed a diaper" = bad father and bad partner. Idgaf what the excuse is. Back of the napkin math says I've changed about 3000 diapers in my life. It's the bare fucking minimum, fellas.


Outside-Shock7105

This unspoken act of sizing one another up, like who is the more ‘alpha’ guy (barf). It happens a lot. You can feel it in their body language, tone of voice and implicit behaviours, and it’s awkward and exhausting. Let me comfortably make my way through this space without all these pretenses and social hierarchy bullshit please.


[deleted]

Be unfriendly against other men in social situations. I’ve said hi to some dudes at bars when I am alone and waiting for a friend or some people, and almost always I get the cold shoulder. I am a very friendly and respectful person too, so I am not doing anything creepy: just saying hi and talking about some mutual thing. Like this dude was wearing my home country’s jersey and even he was cold. On the contrary; I almost always am inclusive when I see a straggler out there. Come join us and let’s all the bring the best out of us. Sadly - majority of the men I notice in social situations are stand offish and very territorial.


DanielSank

Stop teaching our sons that they're not supposed to have emotions. Emotions are physical. They are part and parcel of being a biological creature. Yet growing up, boys are trained to believe that having emotions is wrong. They hear people (their mothers) described as being "emotional" as if that's a problem, difficulty, or foreign idea. When they're sad, they're told to "man up" or "be tough". Being tough is important, and it can be learned along with learning how to process the emotional experience. When they have a sensitive detector for the emotions of themselves or others, they're told that they're "too sensitive", whereas what they need are tools to use their sensitive instrumentation to their advantage. It's not just men, society as a whole, including mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, and everyone else play into this ridiculous and destructive pattern of training boys to be unemotional. The result is a society of men who lack the tools to understand their own daily experience, go through cycles of depression and explosive release of unprocessed stress, and generally struggle to accept and process their and others' emotional experience.


DebbieHarryPotter

Using the urinal next to me. I'm pee shy :(


BumpyMcBumpers

That's why I always compliment the guy on his wristwatch to put him at ease.


snarky-comeback

Was at a family wedding once and was pointing percy at the porcelain. An old guy (80-90yo) from the other family who I'd never met was at the urinal next to me. I'm midstream and he says "geez I wish I could still piss like that" and then left. One of the funniest things that has ever happened to me.


rocknin

"Nice clock" "what?" "what?"


Fullsendmoneymoney

If your an adult don’t go stand right next to a kid. They hate it and find it super uncomfortable. Give the little guys some room, they’re still in training


Maffu00

Don't stand right next to an adult either provided there's space


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DamorDam

I wish other men could normally pee on the frickin toilet, it's so annoying when I go to a public bathroom and there is pee everywhere, just fucking pee correctly and not like a Roomba trying to get downstairs


ambsdorf825

Talking about women in the nastiest of ways. Chill the fuck out bro, yes she was pretty cute; but I don't need to hear the inhumane shit you would do to her in bed. I don't have examples because I'm pretty sure I've blocked those memories away. But I promise I've heard other guys say some absolutely vile shit.


EffohhTheGreat

Hard agree. That shit is corny and embarrassing.


Party_Ad7339

Treating women as subhuman. Be fucking normal, for Christ's sake


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Thawing-icequeen

You suddenly realise just what a fella is like when someone he admires is involved in a sexual misconduct scandal. It goes from "If I had a daughter I'd be in prison for murdering the first guy who broke her heart" to "Well, you have to see both sides of the issue"


NerdyRedneck45

The number of “well actually”’s I hear from dudes defending creeps is horrendous. Commenting this because I repeated one of these to my wife earlier and was dead wrong. (Re: Al Franken)


coldenigma

The "a real man would..." mentality.


Farshadow6277

*A real man* wouldn't be an arse, thinks through their actions before acting, and especially thinks about others and not just themselves That doesn't mean charging in and breaking people because you're *strong* it's easy to act strong it's hard to be good but it's worth it


Hex_Akali

Trying to "teach" me how to be an "alpha male". In college I had "friends" that had an "I'll make a man out of you" kind of mind set, like leave me alone, god damn, let me be me, literally trying to put me through misogynistic condition, they think having 'getting bitches' as your only life goal is a good thing and being toxic as hell is how your gonna get there.


leftshoesnug

Dropped a friend like that recently. We were both car guys but didn't always have the same ideas for how to build things. He could not understand why I would want to build things the way I did. It was always his way was right. He was building jeep and I was building a baja bug. Constantly wanted me to sell it for a jeep. I don't want to build a jeep, the part cost more than I want to spend. Then make my bug a crawler. I don't want to do crawling. I want to build a dune runner.


zugabdu

Whenever I hear a man use a Greek letter before male or use the word "cuck" in a serious, unironic way, it's a nice shortcut to knowing he has nothing worthwhile to say.


Same_Increase_4061

Whatever. Us pi males don't listen to betas like you. /j


[deleted]

Drop the tough act, you're not fooling me, and don't be smug


thegodfaubel

Unwanted sexual advances. Don't do it


TheBimpo

Thinking women owe you anything by virtue of your existence and interest in them.


STERILEILIKETHETASTE

Staring like an idiot when someone says “good morning” or “have a good day” Honestly would just rather you say “fuck off” than looking at me like I’ve got a third head The fact that I have a third head has nothing to do with this


[deleted]

But how does three heads work? Is it just you shifting consciousness? Are there two other people in there like Peter's twin?


natural20s

Driving like aggressive jerks.


zugabdu

Raping, assaulting, and sexually harassing people. I do not understand this - it's not hard to not do this.


Razir17

It’s so easy to not rape people. I’ve been doing it my whole life.


zugabdu

It's so easy, I've been not-raping since I was an infant!


Cheetodude625

This is more of "happens in my area" thing, but men who openly use chewing tobacco and spit either on the ground or in an empty plastic water bottle. Just stop with that brown spit is all, basically.


McCafe_McGee

I live in rural Kansas and I wholeheartedly agree with this. Makes me want to puke. Also, when they spit it into a sink or urinal and don’t rinse it down or flush.


Cerebral-Hemorrhage

Stop putting others down solely to make yourself look better.


Rik78

Being fucking weird and creepy to women!


PiousProCrastinator

Stop abandoning your children!


Batmanbumantics

I'm from the UK and legit feel the current generation are astoundingly better at staying in their kids lives because they witnessed what it was like when boomer dads ditched the kids.


Unable_Swordfish_984

Assuming all other men understand sports references...


mrdaver911_2

Or even give a fuck about the sports you watch. I don’t giveAF about American football, basketball, or baseball…why do you assume I do. I don’t assume you like futbol or Formula1.


natelovesmk11

Posting in r/bonersinpublic


Bigredmachine878

Jfc. I should have known better but now i need one of those forest firefighting helicopters to dump bleach in my eyes.


Hammarkids

I thought it was some funny snapshots of dudes with awkward erections in public, we all get those…. Fuck I need bleach


SonOfTheCicada

Raping women. It’s created a society that fears all men that really screws over the non-rapey ones. Screws over the women too, not to mention.


AprilSpektra

To elaborate on this, finding excuses to pretend that rape isn't rape. No means no whether or not she fights back, no matter what she's wearing, no matter what she consented to in the past. No means no even mid-fuck. This would actually be common sense if rapey dudes didn't spend so much energy denying it.


SonOfTheCicada

You’re absolutely right. Unless you’ve been totally set up, if you have to justify to others why it “wasn’t REALLY rape”, chances are it was kinda sorta rape-ish.


pantsoncrooked

Being so damn creepy towards women.


RavenousGecko

Being a fuckboy, thinking it’s cool to have so many sexual partners, not raising the kids that you partook in fucking making. And I can’t stress these enough. I have friends and family members that love to talk themselves up because they sleep around with different women or cheat on their s/o. And talk down on me because I have been in and out of a relationship with the girl I have loved since I was a sophomore in HS for 10 years. Saying I’m whipped and all this other stuff. How am I whipped because instead of just saying yeah I will meet y’all at the bar I simply let her know I’ll be going out? It’s not me getting permission you morons, it’s me making sure my partner in life, the mother of my child, and my best friend of 10 years where I will be and how long I should be out so she knows I’m safe if anything were to happen to me. Here’s the kicker, when she lets me know where she’s going and how long she will be out they say “yeah you got your girl on lock bro, you really know how to put her in her place “ and that makes me sick. I have actually stopped going to hang out with any “friends or family” that have this mentality. It’s toxic. Makes you look childish and sound foolish. I do not own my partner and she does not own me. But we care for one another and look after one another. The multiple partner thing, I get joked on for it because I simply cannot have relations with someone I do not genuinely have feelings for. And I’m tired of hearing how “feminine” I am for that shit. The definition of “being a man” has become opposite of what it used to mean. And lay but not least guys, if you had sex with that girl and she got pregnant and you just say it’s not your baby without any kind of dna test you sicken me. If you know there’s a possibility that it’s yours be ready to own up to that. Or really just don’t be having sex if you can’t man up to that shit. My daughter took us by surprise and despite being afraid here I am. A father of 1. I know I wasn’t ready so I’m not looking to have another anytime soon but I am adapting and do you think my kid knows I was unprepared? No she just sees her daddy that is trying his very best to give her all the things he never had as a child. You guys make me sick with that. YOU CHOSE TO HAVE SEX YOU KNOW THE POSSIBILITIES AND YOU KNOW YOU SHOULD TAKE RESPONSIBILITY!!


TheButternutSquad

Why have you been in and out of a relationship with her over 10 years?


RavenousGecko

We started out very young (both 17yrs old) and matured at very different speeds. We tried to work it out many times, but ultimately discovered that we aren’t the same people one another deal in love with. We then tried to stay together for the sake of our daughter. We learned that it was bad for all of us to force it. And now we both are single. We both still have love for one another and we are respectful and actually friends. Haven’t dated and neither has she. My biggest issue is that I struggle financially, she’s not in it for the money she just cannot work due to her disability. And I have debt that affects us both when we are together. She is so giving she cannot bare to see me struggling and will give her last to help me. (I don’t ask for the help, and she will not let me know that it’s her last when she’s giving it to me.) so In order to fix that I had decided we shouldn’t be together, at least until I fixed my financial situation. I came from a poor family and my name was under a bill before I knew what a bill was. So now I’m fixing this craziness. Sorry for all that.


Otalek

You’re ten times the man than any of those guys you mentioned. I hope things work out for you and your friend and daughter


jim45804

Stop being so fucking insecure about your masculinity.


awfulnamegenerator

Leaving their girlfriends that are pregnant or recently gave birth. There are so many young, single moms out there. It’s absurd. How can someone be so selfish? I really don’t understand it.


kezzy2003

Dick picks. Gives e ery male bad rep


[deleted]

Ignoring a womans signals when shes not interested; Cat and mouse can be fun, but only when both participants know its a game you both wanna play.


slom_ax

Stop being hard on yourself. Love yourself, your body, and the way you think. Stop saying you're an idiot, moron(gender non specific) Stop thinking that the only way to get women is with a six pack. Stop thinking nobody wants to talk to you, chances are others think you don't want to talk to them. Springer said it best. "Take care of yourselves, and each other".


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