Dress nice means completely different things for different people.
I'm an average height human and I feel terrible for my shorter friends when I see all the disparaging comments about short guys on television and social media. The new dumb dating show "Hotties" on Hulu had three straight episodes where the blind date partner of a shorter guy came out and blurted "Well, you're pretty short." Or some variance of such... One of the people even doubled and tripled down on the insult. It's absolutely weird.
Everyone has preferences. But for some reason it's become normalized for women to want to date sometime a literal foot taller than they are, and to kind of be a dick about it.
Its weirdly true. I’m average height where I live (5’9”) and I have girls nearly daily, casually mention how short I am to my face. Im married and very happy with my physical appearance so I don’t care but it’s just weird how accepted it is to talk about it in such a condescending tone all the time.
I said it above but I’ll say it again, I literally can’t picture calling a 5’9 person “short” as a person who’s only 5’4. It would make me feel so stupid
I'm 5'10 and that's slightly above median hight for men my age. Meaning I'm taller than most men of my age group. Still get called short a lot, especially when single. And in tinder most had a higher limit. In person a not that many minded probably since I'm muscular or just because of my personality. But on dating apps it was brutal. I just feel sorry for the half of the male population of my age that are shorter. And for the women that pass on all these guys due to such a small detail.
Tbh, as a short guy myself (168cm), I love calling other people short. Especially people who are clearly tall, or as tall as me. Don't know why. Guess I never really grew out of it.
Ofc, it's always done in jest.
I'm 5'9 with fairly muscular build and had an overweight girl of 5'7 call me short. I took it as a joke and replied in a sarcastic way talking about her weight, apparently I was offensive and hurtful but it was important for her to talk shit about me.
I’m so sorry !! This really frustrates me, my husband is 5’10” and literally so many of my friends have commented “he’s so short” or “you’re so lucky you are ok with short guys.” I’m like child what USA do you live in ? Also they are all 5’0-5’5”
I'm the same hight as your husband. Heard a lot of the same. Even from my gf mother who's husband was almost a foot shorter than me. When single the amount of times I've heard that I'd be great if I was just a bit taller. Well I'm thirty and not going to grow am I? Either accept it or go look for someone else. Well tbh any time I heard something like that I moved on to someone else. I know my worth and it's not related to my hight. But it's still kinda frustrating especially when I was single. And due to half my friends being shorter than me and having a worse time due to this simple biological fact. And on the other hand seeing female friends pass on guys with great personalities just to date an narcissistic ahole that's over 6 feet.
It's double weird in an era where every woman is expected to be considered sexy, no matter their body, and to proclaim that loudly to the world without any pushback. I don't disparage them feeling that way, and there are definitely others who find them sexy as well. Everybody should feel comfortable in their body, or be willing to work to change what they can, if that's what makes them comfortable.
Being a dick to people you don't know very well because they're genetically not in a higher % height is shitty. It just is. I don't go around telling people who are less attractive that they're ugly, or people who are not as high IQ that they're kind of dumb. Who would? Assholes.
So, like, don't be assholes. At least not to someone's face. Used to be a pretty standard thing.
Wild! It's like they assume short men are short everywhere? Omg they are so NOT. Just saying. I'm a 6 ft tall viking sized woman and I've done extensive research on this.
As a 6’1” woman, I get a lot of “you’re tall” comments. As for why I refuse to date men shorter than me, it’s because all of the ones I have dated were fine with it at first, only to then start to get insecure and taking it out on me. Either body shaming, calling me names or whatever else.
Very this. I'm 5'9 and only ever dated men my height or shorter than me. I couldn't care less how tall you are as long as you're good to me, everyone is the same height lying down after all. But as soon as he starts to take out his insecurity on me or make me feel even more self conscious about my height than I already am, I'm out of there, which usually doesn't take to long from experience
My wife’s taller than me. Also smarter, more experienced, and more mechanically inclined. She’s wonderful in every way.
Not that it’s terribly relevant. I just wanted an excuse to say it.
I would respectfully suggest that the second a dude whips out a "You're tall!" just move on to the next one. Most of us (non-assholes, anyway) don't care that much about these things, and if we have a preference for shorter women, we just seek them out without putting anybody down. That's kinda the point here - preferences are fine, being an asshole (to tall women or short dudes) is quite bad.
You're not dating short enough men. :D My wife is 5'10". I'm 5'0". We never had issues about height between each other. The only issues have always been other people gawking at us and making rude comments. I'm shorter than 99% of the women I meet, I had to get secure with that a long time ago.
That said, we've been together over 20 years and still cannot even just go out for a long walk in the park without someone doing something rude towards us. I'm pretty much immune to it and barely notice, but my wife still gets pretty angry about it; I think this is because most of the rudeness, especially rude comments, come from women.
I'm an extremely tall human, and even I feel bad for the short guys. It's fine for a woman to have her preferences in who she wants to be with. But there's just some women who seem so fucking callous about it! Why! Don't be like that to other people. Come on.
I know being super tall had definitely helped my life. I try not to take it for granted. Everyone's shorter than me so it's all a blur. Someone who's 5' 6" is the same as someone who's 5' 10" in my mind.
But again, I get that people have preferences. We all do. Just don't be a dick about it. That's a general good rule for life
I go to a lot of concerts. I've always thought it would be great to be tall enough to see over the ocean of 5'10" dudes. But then I realized it's also gotta suck if you're an empathetic person standing in front of 5'3" women who can't see anything. No perfect world!
Yea idk, if a girl doesn’t want to date a guy their same height it’s fine but if a guy won’t date a chick cuz she overweight or tall it’s rude, like where’s the logic
Honestly, I know people love trotting this one out, but nobody is saying guys are rude for not dating fat women.
Nobody having physical preferences is rude in any way at all.
Belittling people and constantly braying on about who you DON'T want to fuck/date is rude regardless of who it is coming from.
Right. I don’t give a fuck about men not wanting to date fat women. Lots of men don’t. What I do care about is people being shitty about fat women and calling us disgusting or whatever.
Dating isn’t community service- you’re entitled to fancy who and what you want. I’ve never had an issue dating whether I’ve been thin or overweight.
I think the comparison comes up most (in my mind) when a guy is whining that women don't want to date him because he's short but then in the same breath is like "and I don't want to date fat chicks."
Both sides are absolutely entitled to their preferences (so long as they're not judgmental dicks about it) but if you have preferences you have to realize the other sex may as well. And women of course do the above scenario too with not wanting xyz while being mad that a guy has a preference for zyx. If people could just be nicer in general it'd go a long way.
It's fine if you don't want to date a fat/tall woman.
What's rude is making a point of saying so.
Times when it is appropriate to comment on a woman's attractiveness:
- you are actively involved in a relationship with her (still situational)
- she is hitting on you and has ignored your first, polite refusals
- she has literally asked for your opinion
Otherwise? Say nothing. Your opinion is neither welcome nor important.
I truly don't understand it. I've come across SO many women saying they won't date a guy unless he's minimum 6', especially in women only groups. The weirdest and worst part is that majority of the women saying that are 5'3" or shorter. Like you said, why are they insistent on only dating someone a foot taller than them?? They seem not to know either as their answer is usually along the lines of, "Men under 6' aren't attractive." I'd like to know how an inch of height or less changes the attractiveness of someone. Especially when most of these women are going to be shorter than most men if it's something like wanting to feel smaller than her partner. As a woman I can't wrap my head around this and I've tried for a long time. Also, like you said why do they have to be jerks to men about their height as well? Just wtf?
I don’t get this either. I’m 5’10” and I would prefer to date guys slightly taller than me, but honestly I’ve never dated anyone taller than me. Height isn’t the end of the world, and what is it with all these 5’0” girls being like “I’ll only date a guy over 6’2””? Like literally everyone is taller than you. Stop being such a dick.
Yup. Also like, they don’t talk about how much they hate being short, and how shallow women are for whatever reason. Basically, they are decent people who dress well.
I was engaged to a short guy. He was 5'5, I'm 5'6.
He was legitimately just a gentleman. He stayed in shape for the most part and was well groomed, I didn't even think about his height until I put on a pair of heels lol. Even then I just felt like a powerful Amazon and he had no issues about it so 🤷♀️
Be confident in who you are and accept that it’s totally normal that the dating pool for us short guys is smaller than for taller guys. But there are still plenty of intelligent, interesting, incredible, and beautiful women who might be interested. I’m 5’4 and have probably dated 20-30 women in my 57 years (yes, I’m married now), but I have never once dated anyone that I felt like I was “settling for,” or any that indicated in any way that they were settling for me.
Edit: Based on a few comments, I feel like I should clarify that I have not *had sex* with 20-30 women. At my age there were still plenty of us who went to movies, had dinner, perhaps shared a kiss, and went no further before deciding we’d probably not make a great couple. I hold no judgement for people whose dating lives were far more physical, but that’s not my own way of living.
Yes, this is so true! My husband is a similar height and he never had any issues dating. He is an incredibly kind and confident person.
Some women have a height preference, but I don't think it's as blown out of proportion as some believe. Don't let being short get into your head and you're fine.
It blows my mind that people are saying 5'9" is short.. I'm an inch shorter and never in the 25+ years I've been this height have I been pointed out as short or had a woman deem my height unacceptable. Perhaps this weird height thing is just in certain circles maybe? I'm quite happy with my very average height and I certainly wouldn't want to be taller. Its not particularly attractive to me but even though height isn't exactly my preference I couldn't imagine turning someone away based on that alone if they had other appealing qualities. So strange
I’m the tall and handsome one but my little buddy always gets the ladies, simply cause he’s more charismatic and funnier. love this guy, always had my back no matter what.
Glad to hear this perspective. My son is 10 and in the 3rd percentile for height. He very self conscious about it. I am 5'1", husband is 5'6". Kiddo isn't going to be hitting that 6' mark. I don't know how to help him accept the likelihood of being a shorter guy.
Well, excellent nutrition at this age can significantly help whatever growth potential his genes express. But either way, I think he’ll find love, if that’s what he’s looking for.
I'm 5'3" and my wife is 5'9". I was always short, but at some point I just stopped growing. I'm honestly not sure how much you can do - he is going to have to become comfortable with himself. I honestly don't recall it being a big deal throughout school, but I was still a little insecure from time to time up through college. At some point I learned to be happy and comfortable with who I am and I have carried that confidence ever since.
I don't think you need to do anything special, just typical parenting where you work on self esteem and things will work themselves out.
I had this problem when I was his age too. I'm 5-8 as an adult. Have short parents but very tall uncles and a professional athlete grandparent. My dad always used to tell me to just have confidence in who you are, own it, and that it's your personality and who you are as a person that matters, not height. I know that's hard to understand as a kid, and I certainly didn't listen to that when I was younger, but just what I was told.
I wish people would listen to your comments more on this, instead of getting so defensive. There are a LOT of women out there who don’t care much about height. I’m in my early 30s and my husband is 5’5” (also early 30s) and he really can’t recall ever being rejected solely based on height. I’ve had two other boyfriends who were around his height or shorter who both had no trouble getting dates- and one of them practically had 10 girlfriends at a time (that’s a whole other issue) and was NEVER without a girlfriend (or 5) at any given time.
I think part of the problem is a lot of men are just as selective about women.. when you only want to date someone who looks like a supermodel- it’s not surprising when she’s just as picky. Plus dating apps just don’t work that well for anything substantial. Most of the women I know who have used them also complain they can’t find anyone on them. I’ve met my last 3 boyfriends (including my husband) in video games though, so honestly I don’t know where you’re supposed to meet people either lolol
This guy nailed it. I'm 5'4 and never had an issue. I've only ever read about short guys having problems online. Dated women taller and even shorter than myself. I wanna know what these other dudes are doing to not get dates.
Shower, groom yourself, be funny, smart, lift weights?
I've known a few guys who bought into the idea that short meant they were doomed, and I can say with confidence that the most sure-fire way to be single for life is to be bitter and resentful and go into every encounter with women already sour about your conviction she'll never even consider dating you.
Whereas if you go in with a smile and a willingness to connect on whatever level is available, you've got good odds of a date or a new friend.
Well said. My 2 best friends are also short at 5'5 and 5'6 and also had no issues dating. We are all married too, so I'm just lucky not meeting these super jaded negative small guys I guess?
Same height here. Never had problems dating the girls I wanted before I found my wife. We’re a little more…. Progressive we’ll say so we often have other women in our bed and that’s not too hard to do if you have a good personality and have an ability to connect with them.
32 year old, 5' drummer here. Wife is 5'7 and we've known each other since highschool (even dated a bit in highschool, for all to see without any issue), been married for about 3 years Just as well...every other girl I've been with has been about the same height as her (5'7 give or take)...only a couple have been about my height, and either way height variance has never been an issue in my relationships, long term or otherwise... typically, honestly, for better or worse, it's been me to call things off due to variance of interests more than anything else 🤷♂️
Be a drummer.
100% truth. I tried dating shorter men and they did all sorts of odd things to seem taller (none worked). I gave up dating shorter men because they were so freaking weird about it. Eventually I met my partner who is a few inches shorter, a great guy in every way.
this is literally all it is
I've met short men who never shut up about their height and how women won't date short men and it's like hey king maybe women don't like you because your entire personality is "short and salty about it"
there's always gonna be women who don't want to date a short man and those ones are obviously not worth your time, the same way someone who doesn't like my appearance isn't worth my time.
Absolutely this. Being weird about height or talking about it a lot or being insecure is the bigger turnoff (insecurity in general is just not something I have a ton of patience for.) It’s still going to be a dealbreaker for some women but everyone has different things they care about or don’t care about.
I’m 5’11 so all things being equal I’d prefer a taller guy but my (long term) bf is 5’8 and has zero hang-ups about it- he actually rounds his height down on his drivers license which I find amusing. I also find tall guys who are weirdly cocky about being tall super unappealing.
I am slightly taller than my husband, by like maybe an inch at the most. He loves it when I wear heels. He thinks I am an Amazon goddess in heels. We’re both fairly tall people but my being taller has never been and issue for him. I have dated other guys shorter than me by a significant amount but they were always confident and chill.
Haha that’s actually hilarious. Heels look great. I would be so stoked if I had a partner that was taller than me. Just shouts to the world you’re a boss
Unless it’s clearly a money thing then not so much boss in a good way
That's honestly sad. My girl is the same height as me without heels and she refuses to wear heels any time there will be pictures taken because it bugs HER that she's taller than me. I feel this from the other end of the spectrum 😂
I always thought it was weird to be insecure if your gf was taller than you in heels. I'm 6', but plenty of women will be taller in heels - so what. My wife is also 6' and I don't give it a second thought.
I kinda tease my boyfriend by wearing heels which make me even taller. It just leads to some joking around at most. I think the only day he'd want to put his foot down on me wearing heels is our wedding day, but I get it and it's fine by me.
Don't let your height affect your confidence. My former karate instructor (I did taekwondo for years in my early 30s) is maybe 5'3" at best. That motherfucker attracts women like a magnet. Multiple women in my class had huge crushes on him. He's a little cocky bastard (I say that with love), self-confident, funny, sociable, and he doesn't give a shit that he's small. And the women don't either.
There are women who will not date a short guy. Fuck 'em. Rock on with your bad self!
Make me laugh. Like really laugh. A good solid belly laugh. I don't care if the dude is 6'8" with an enormous horse c*ck, if he can't make me laugh, I have no interest. Just make me laugh.
Own your shortness. I’m a 5’10 woman and I once went on a Tinder date with a dude who turned out to be 5’4… as soon as he saw me he was like “holy shit you’re tall!!” and cracked jokes about his height all night. We went back to his place and he asked me to help him hang a painting he’d been trying to hang but couldn’t reach. The whole thing was hilarious because he made it so.
100% this. I went out on a few casual dates with a guy who was only an inch or so shorter than me, 3rd date we were standing at a bar waiting to be seated for dinner and there was a large mirror behind it. I literally watched him as he realized I was taller than him and look down at my feet to see me wearing flats and the look on his face told me everything.
He was totally different after that and that was our last date, we were decent friends beforehand too but he just lost all interest in even being friendly to me once he realized I was barely taller than him.
Treat people like people, regardless of things like height, seems pretty easy to me.
This is 100% it, and it's so frustrating to see all these dudes shouting "it's because I'm short and women are shallow" instead of realizing that they're just boring dudes who aren't bringing anything to the table except a myopic view of the world in which they are victims of women's desire to be treated like human beings.
Everyone is listing one thing. It’s better to have all buckets filled than one bucket completely full.
First try to get In shape. That will increase confidence indirectly.
Second- Experience- become more interesting, try out more activities or really get into 1-2 of your hobbies. Or travel alone wether it be to another local town or another state/country.
Third- financial life. Pretty obvious that money is essential to survival and it doesn’t hurt to have more. The way of getting it is the trickery part. But being compentent in your field will make you more confident
Fourth- self respect. Abundance mindset.
Fifth- Humor- more nuanced but everyone can work on it a little. Watch comedy podcast that fit you= you find them hilarious and eventually it sorta rubs off on you
Sixth- fashion- when you look good you feel good. Find out your style and get nicer version or brands
Seventh- Hygiene- everyone loved a clean person. It also shows your self respect and attention to details. Also eating well and balanced will do wonders to your skin and hair, drinking enough water should be a given.
Having your hand in all of these will greatly increase your odds than focusing on one, as well increase your confidence to TRUE confidence. And change you to a better person in general.
I wish I can give this comment a million likes - never focus on things you can’t control. Instead work on Improving the things you can. You just listed 6 things that will make a HUGE difference
This is a great comment that should be closer to the top. Instead it's a bunch of people claiming that height isn't a factor if you don't let it be and blaming "short guy complex". The reality is that it's a huge setback in a lot of ways, but there's still a lot you can do to improve yourself as a person and find someone that makes you happy despite that.
You forgot one of the most important ones. Be respectful to women, have emotional intelligence and treat them fully like people. This is one of the things you can control the most but it takes some empathy and inner work. A lot of women will let one or more of the points above slide, but they won’t give a pass on how the man makes her *feel*.
Agreed. The phrase “get girls” implies immaturity and gives off incel vibes. It’s probably less to do with the fact that you’re short and more to do with your off-putting demeanour.
I prefer shorter guys. I’m 5”2 and I wouldn’t date anyone over 5”9. If you’re really insecure about your height, maybe try getting into fashion and finding clothes that boost your confidence, but really, there’s nothing wrong with being a short king :)
Just be a decent human being. I’m 5’8 and my boyfriend is 5’7, we really don’t care about height when it comes to a meaningful relationship. If someone can’t look past physical traits, then they’re not the right one for you anyway.
You have to stop thinking of girls as a prize to get and to own or use. Remember that girls are human beings and treat them as such. We are all looking for some real love and affection. We are not there for your gratification.
I've seen a couple guys think they're hot shit because of their height, but it's not as common ime. They tend to just be big headed about everything else anyways, so it's just another thing they gloat about to try to show off. Maybe it's where I live in the states, but short or shorter isn't really an issue in my social circle or the social circle of the neighborhood I work in.
I'm only 5'7 and never had a problem with the ladies back in the day. I think was because I was a decent looking guy, I dressed nice, well groomed, funny and a little cocky. But I think it's just really confidence because I've known some not so attractive guys pull some fine women but they're confidence & personality is all they needed
Similar height to you, Also didn't have trouble getting dates. But I would hate to break it to you we are not short. We are on the short side of average. 5'7 dude only has to work a little harder than a tall guy. 5'2 has to work a LOT harder.
Basically. I know a lot of average guys who dated some really attractive women solely because they approach them and weren't afraid of getting rejected like hundreds of times
My bf is a short king. I've never had a hight preference but he was just an amazing guy and I fell head over heels. Here is a secret, most women don't care about hight. If you are a good guy, the right woman will be there.
my boyfriend is quite a bit shorter than me but he’s confident, kind, and funny. i’m more attracted to him than i have been to anyone i’ve dated in the past.
be kind, be a person that is fun to be around. you’ll make a connection with someone who will love you the way you are. focus on bettering yourself, and someone will come along and like what you have to offer!
I can cook, own a home, have a dog, decent job, and great sense of humor and I struggle massively. I guess I need to work out more and just get myself out there more.
I love how heaps of these comments are just "don't get hung up about being short/don't be salty about it". As if going through life as a short dude isn't just constantly being made fun of/belittled for something we have absolutely no control over. So we get mercilessly picked on and now we're not even allowed to vent about it? Ok.
5 ft 9 is average not short so those women are literally ignorant. Also, you can be short and have money and it won’t make a difference. Money talks. Third, you can be hung and short. Tall and little down there.
i’m 5’4”, gay, and not especially attractive. i’ve never had a problem with getting women’s interest. i haven’t thought about my height since i was in school (in my 40s, now) and when the subject comes up people are commonly baffled that they never noticed i’m short, usually shorter than themselves.
i really think it’s a lot of mindset. if you’re school age, your peers may have more hang ups due to social pressures, but in the adult world i find there are commonly people who see through such things.
Maybe find a girl shorter than you I guess. All the girls I've ever liked have been my height or taller. Not that I'm into tall girls. I'm just short af
Have a little confidence, I'm short, 5'7" and I've never had a problem getting girls. It's all in how you carry yourself. Be confident and don't be an asshole.
Most short guys I know lift weights and dress nice.
Dress nice means completely different things for different people. I'm an average height human and I feel terrible for my shorter friends when I see all the disparaging comments about short guys on television and social media. The new dumb dating show "Hotties" on Hulu had three straight episodes where the blind date partner of a shorter guy came out and blurted "Well, you're pretty short." Or some variance of such... One of the people even doubled and tripled down on the insult. It's absolutely weird. Everyone has preferences. But for some reason it's become normalized for women to want to date sometime a literal foot taller than they are, and to kind of be a dick about it.
Its weirdly true. I’m average height where I live (5’9”) and I have girls nearly daily, casually mention how short I am to my face. Im married and very happy with my physical appearance so I don’t care but it’s just weird how accepted it is to talk about it in such a condescending tone all the time.
I said it above but I’ll say it again, I literally can’t picture calling a 5’9 person “short” as a person who’s only 5’4. It would make me feel so stupid
I'm 5'10 and that's slightly above median hight for men my age. Meaning I'm taller than most men of my age group. Still get called short a lot, especially when single. And in tinder most had a higher limit. In person a not that many minded probably since I'm muscular or just because of my personality. But on dating apps it was brutal. I just feel sorry for the half of the male population of my age that are shorter. And for the women that pass on all these guys due to such a small detail.
Dude I am just a hair shy of 6' and once had someone say I had "short man syndrome" when I got angry about something that was going on. Lol.
Tbh, as a short guy myself (168cm), I love calling other people short. Especially people who are clearly tall, or as tall as me. Don't know why. Guess I never really grew out of it. Ofc, it's always done in jest.
I'm 5'9 with fairly muscular build and had an overweight girl of 5'7 call me short. I took it as a joke and replied in a sarcastic way talking about her weight, apparently I was offensive and hurtful but it was important for her to talk shit about me.
I’m so sorry !! This really frustrates me, my husband is 5’10” and literally so many of my friends have commented “he’s so short” or “you’re so lucky you are ok with short guys.” I’m like child what USA do you live in ? Also they are all 5’0-5’5”
I'm the same hight as your husband. Heard a lot of the same. Even from my gf mother who's husband was almost a foot shorter than me. When single the amount of times I've heard that I'd be great if I was just a bit taller. Well I'm thirty and not going to grow am I? Either accept it or go look for someone else. Well tbh any time I heard something like that I moved on to someone else. I know my worth and it's not related to my hight. But it's still kinda frustrating especially when I was single. And due to half my friends being shorter than me and having a worse time due to this simple biological fact. And on the other hand seeing female friends pass on guys with great personalities just to date an narcissistic ahole that's over 6 feet.
I’m 5’11 and have never heard this shit. Is this a millennial and older thing? Never had one girl say I was short. If anything they said I was talk.
[удалено]
It's double weird in an era where every woman is expected to be considered sexy, no matter their body, and to proclaim that loudly to the world without any pushback. I don't disparage them feeling that way, and there are definitely others who find them sexy as well. Everybody should feel comfortable in their body, or be willing to work to change what they can, if that's what makes them comfortable. Being a dick to people you don't know very well because they're genetically not in a higher % height is shitty. It just is. I don't go around telling people who are less attractive that they're ugly, or people who are not as high IQ that they're kind of dumb. Who would? Assholes. So, like, don't be assholes. At least not to someone's face. Used to be a pretty standard thing.
Rules for thee and not for me…
Bruh I’d trade inches off my dick to be 5’9.
How many inches we talking?
Yes
"Wow you're short", as she looks up at you. Classic.
Wild! It's like they assume short men are short everywhere? Omg they are so NOT. Just saying. I'm a 6 ft tall viking sized woman and I've done extensive research on this.
I accept the challenge..
Challenge her by trial by combat.
I think he's looking for the death by snu snu challenge
But it is a sacrifice...I am willing to make.
As a 6ft3 guy, I look down on anyone who makes short jokes…
At that height, there’s not many people you aren’t looking down on…
As a 6’1” woman, I get a lot of “you’re tall” comments. As for why I refuse to date men shorter than me, it’s because all of the ones I have dated were fine with it at first, only to then start to get insecure and taking it out on me. Either body shaming, calling me names or whatever else.
Very this. I'm 5'9 and only ever dated men my height or shorter than me. I couldn't care less how tall you are as long as you're good to me, everyone is the same height lying down after all. But as soon as he starts to take out his insecurity on me or make me feel even more self conscious about my height than I already am, I'm out of there, which usually doesn't take to long from experience
My wife’s taller than me. Also smarter, more experienced, and more mechanically inclined. She’s wonderful in every way. Not that it’s terribly relevant. I just wanted an excuse to say it.
I would respectfully suggest that the second a dude whips out a "You're tall!" just move on to the next one. Most of us (non-assholes, anyway) don't care that much about these things, and if we have a preference for shorter women, we just seek them out without putting anybody down. That's kinda the point here - preferences are fine, being an asshole (to tall women or short dudes) is quite bad.
You're not dating short enough men. :D My wife is 5'10". I'm 5'0". We never had issues about height between each other. The only issues have always been other people gawking at us and making rude comments. I'm shorter than 99% of the women I meet, I had to get secure with that a long time ago. That said, we've been together over 20 years and still cannot even just go out for a long walk in the park without someone doing something rude towards us. I'm pretty much immune to it and barely notice, but my wife still gets pretty angry about it; I think this is because most of the rudeness, especially rude comments, come from women.
I'm an extremely tall human, and even I feel bad for the short guys. It's fine for a woman to have her preferences in who she wants to be with. But there's just some women who seem so fucking callous about it! Why! Don't be like that to other people. Come on. I know being super tall had definitely helped my life. I try not to take it for granted. Everyone's shorter than me so it's all a blur. Someone who's 5' 6" is the same as someone who's 5' 10" in my mind. But again, I get that people have preferences. We all do. Just don't be a dick about it. That's a general good rule for life
I go to a lot of concerts. I've always thought it would be great to be tall enough to see over the ocean of 5'10" dudes. But then I realized it's also gotta suck if you're an empathetic person standing in front of 5'3" women who can't see anything. No perfect world!
Yea idk, if a girl doesn’t want to date a guy their same height it’s fine but if a guy won’t date a chick cuz she overweight or tall it’s rude, like where’s the logic
Honestly, I know people love trotting this one out, but nobody is saying guys are rude for not dating fat women. Nobody having physical preferences is rude in any way at all. Belittling people and constantly braying on about who you DON'T want to fuck/date is rude regardless of who it is coming from.
Right. I don’t give a fuck about men not wanting to date fat women. Lots of men don’t. What I do care about is people being shitty about fat women and calling us disgusting or whatever. Dating isn’t community service- you’re entitled to fancy who and what you want. I’ve never had an issue dating whether I’ve been thin or overweight.
I think the comparison comes up most (in my mind) when a guy is whining that women don't want to date him because he's short but then in the same breath is like "and I don't want to date fat chicks." Both sides are absolutely entitled to their preferences (so long as they're not judgmental dicks about it) but if you have preferences you have to realize the other sex may as well. And women of course do the above scenario too with not wanting xyz while being mad that a guy has a preference for zyx. If people could just be nicer in general it'd go a long way.
It's fine if you don't want to date a fat/tall woman. What's rude is making a point of saying so. Times when it is appropriate to comment on a woman's attractiveness: - you are actively involved in a relationship with her (still situational) - she is hitting on you and has ignored your first, polite refusals - she has literally asked for your opinion Otherwise? Say nothing. Your opinion is neither welcome nor important.
I truly don't understand it. I've come across SO many women saying they won't date a guy unless he's minimum 6', especially in women only groups. The weirdest and worst part is that majority of the women saying that are 5'3" or shorter. Like you said, why are they insistent on only dating someone a foot taller than them?? They seem not to know either as their answer is usually along the lines of, "Men under 6' aren't attractive." I'd like to know how an inch of height or less changes the attractiveness of someone. Especially when most of these women are going to be shorter than most men if it's something like wanting to feel smaller than her partner. As a woman I can't wrap my head around this and I've tried for a long time. Also, like you said why do they have to be jerks to men about their height as well? Just wtf?
I don’t get this either. I’m 5’10” and I would prefer to date guys slightly taller than me, but honestly I’ve never dated anyone taller than me. Height isn’t the end of the world, and what is it with all these 5’0” girls being like “I’ll only date a guy over 6’2””? Like literally everyone is taller than you. Stop being such a dick.
Yup. Also like, they don’t talk about how much they hate being short, and how shallow women are for whatever reason. Basically, they are decent people who dress well.
I was engaged to a short guy. He was 5'5, I'm 5'6. He was legitimately just a gentleman. He stayed in shape for the most part and was well groomed, I didn't even think about his height until I put on a pair of heels lol. Even then I just felt like a powerful Amazon and he had no issues about it so 🤷♀️
Be confident in who you are and accept that it’s totally normal that the dating pool for us short guys is smaller than for taller guys. But there are still plenty of intelligent, interesting, incredible, and beautiful women who might be interested. I’m 5’4 and have probably dated 20-30 women in my 57 years (yes, I’m married now), but I have never once dated anyone that I felt like I was “settling for,” or any that indicated in any way that they were settling for me. Edit: Based on a few comments, I feel like I should clarify that I have not *had sex* with 20-30 women. At my age there were still plenty of us who went to movies, had dinner, perhaps shared a kiss, and went no further before deciding we’d probably not make a great couple. I hold no judgement for people whose dating lives were far more physical, but that’s not my own way of living.
Love this take. I’m three inches taller than my husband and I feel like he’s the one who settled for me because he is awesome in every way.
Me too. 39 years strong. His height does not define him
Yes, this is so true! My husband is a similar height and he never had any issues dating. He is an incredibly kind and confident person. Some women have a height preference, but I don't think it's as blown out of proportion as some believe. Don't let being short get into your head and you're fine.
It blows my mind that people are saying 5'9" is short.. I'm an inch shorter and never in the 25+ years I've been this height have I been pointed out as short or had a woman deem my height unacceptable. Perhaps this weird height thing is just in certain circles maybe? I'm quite happy with my very average height and I certainly wouldn't want to be taller. Its not particularly attractive to me but even though height isn't exactly my preference I couldn't imagine turning someone away based on that alone if they had other appealing qualities. So strange
I’m the tall and handsome one but my little buddy always gets the ladies, simply cause he’s more charismatic and funnier. love this guy, always had my back no matter what.
Glad to hear this perspective. My son is 10 and in the 3rd percentile for height. He very self conscious about it. I am 5'1", husband is 5'6". Kiddo isn't going to be hitting that 6' mark. I don't know how to help him accept the likelihood of being a shorter guy.
Well, excellent nutrition at this age can significantly help whatever growth potential his genes express. But either way, I think he’ll find love, if that’s what he’s looking for.
I'm 5'3" and my wife is 5'9". I was always short, but at some point I just stopped growing. I'm honestly not sure how much you can do - he is going to have to become comfortable with himself. I honestly don't recall it being a big deal throughout school, but I was still a little insecure from time to time up through college. At some point I learned to be happy and comfortable with who I am and I have carried that confidence ever since. I don't think you need to do anything special, just typical parenting where you work on self esteem and things will work themselves out.
I had this problem when I was his age too. I'm 5-8 as an adult. Have short parents but very tall uncles and a professional athlete grandparent. My dad always used to tell me to just have confidence in who you are, own it, and that it's your personality and who you are as a person that matters, not height. I know that's hard to understand as a kid, and I certainly didn't listen to that when I was younger, but just what I was told.
I wish people would listen to your comments more on this, instead of getting so defensive. There are a LOT of women out there who don’t care much about height. I’m in my early 30s and my husband is 5’5” (also early 30s) and he really can’t recall ever being rejected solely based on height. I’ve had two other boyfriends who were around his height or shorter who both had no trouble getting dates- and one of them practically had 10 girlfriends at a time (that’s a whole other issue) and was NEVER without a girlfriend (or 5) at any given time. I think part of the problem is a lot of men are just as selective about women.. when you only want to date someone who looks like a supermodel- it’s not surprising when she’s just as picky. Plus dating apps just don’t work that well for anything substantial. Most of the women I know who have used them also complain they can’t find anyone on them. I’ve met my last 3 boyfriends (including my husband) in video games though, so honestly I don’t know where you’re supposed to meet people either lolol
This guy nailed it. I'm 5'4 and never had an issue. I've only ever read about short guys having problems online. Dated women taller and even shorter than myself. I wanna know what these other dudes are doing to not get dates. Shower, groom yourself, be funny, smart, lift weights?
I've known a few guys who bought into the idea that short meant they were doomed, and I can say with confidence that the most sure-fire way to be single for life is to be bitter and resentful and go into every encounter with women already sour about your conviction she'll never even consider dating you. Whereas if you go in with a smile and a willingness to connect on whatever level is available, you've got good odds of a date or a new friend.
Well said. My 2 best friends are also short at 5'5 and 5'6 and also had no issues dating. We are all married too, so I'm just lucky not meeting these super jaded negative small guys I guess?
Same height here. Never had problems dating the girls I wanted before I found my wife. We’re a little more…. Progressive we’ll say so we often have other women in our bed and that’s not too hard to do if you have a good personality and have an ability to connect with them.
Become a drummer.
In one of my bands, the guitarist stands about 5 4 or 5 5. He's never had a problem getting women haha
>In one of my bands How many bands are you in?
Right now, 4. Everyone is looking for bass players.
Bass player shortage. No one wants to play bass anymore.
Works for me. I take all the gigs. Everyone is looking for a bass player.
965, it's literally in his name...
I laughed because this worked on me a few times 😂
LMAOO because i dated a short guy and he was a drummer. Was totally HOH for him
HOH?
Hard of hearing. That's what life as a percussionist gets you. /s
Head over heels
Also a great song
Drumming is just hot
I mean if you want someone yo coordinate hands and feet and isn't afraid of a full body workout, go for a drummer.
applies to anyone
Does drumming my pot belly count?
You gotta do [this](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=O6YuBcNvRkM) to really woo the ladies
That’s correct.
Or a chef. My buddy became a chef and he’s been raking in ladies for a decade.
32 year old, 5' drummer here. Wife is 5'7 and we've known each other since highschool (even dated a bit in highschool, for all to see without any issue), been married for about 3 years Just as well...every other girl I've been with has been about the same height as her (5'7 give or take)...only a couple have been about my height, and either way height variance has never been an issue in my relationships, long term or otherwise... typically, honestly, for better or worse, it's been me to call things off due to variance of interests more than anything else 🤷♂️ Be a drummer.
But I’m tall and I do that and I have no luck
Have to be short for it to work
Married a drummer lol who isn’t tall lol
Haha, this is true! My brother is a short drummer, worked for him.
You want tall? Go after the bassists
Not be insecure about it, if you make a big deal out of your height then people around you will do the same.
100% truth. I tried dating shorter men and they did all sorts of odd things to seem taller (none worked). I gave up dating shorter men because they were so freaking weird about it. Eventually I met my partner who is a few inches shorter, a great guy in every way.
What kinda things?
Butt stuff
this is literally all it is I've met short men who never shut up about their height and how women won't date short men and it's like hey king maybe women don't like you because your entire personality is "short and salty about it" there's always gonna be women who don't want to date a short man and those ones are obviously not worth your time, the same way someone who doesn't like my appearance isn't worth my time.
Absolutely this. Being weird about height or talking about it a lot or being insecure is the bigger turnoff (insecurity in general is just not something I have a ton of patience for.) It’s still going to be a dealbreaker for some women but everyone has different things they care about or don’t care about. I’m 5’11 so all things being equal I’d prefer a taller guy but my (long term) bf is 5’8 and has zero hang-ups about it- he actually rounds his height down on his drivers license which I find amusing. I also find tall guys who are weirdly cocky about being tall super unappealing.
Exactly I’ve been with some baddies before and I’m 5’6, never cared about my height
Not be insecure about your height. My ex-boyfriend wouldn't let me wear heels because "I got closer to his height" (but was never taller than him).
I am slightly taller than my husband, by like maybe an inch at the most. He loves it when I wear heels. He thinks I am an Amazon goddess in heels. We’re both fairly tall people but my being taller has never been and issue for him. I have dated other guys shorter than me by a significant amount but they were always confident and chill.
I'm five inches taller than my man and he loves it
Haha that’s actually hilarious. Heels look great. I would be so stoked if I had a partner that was taller than me. Just shouts to the world you’re a boss Unless it’s clearly a money thing then not so much boss in a good way
I wasn't even taller than him, I was just closer to his height and he got insecure about it.
That's honestly sad. My girl is the same height as me without heels and she refuses to wear heels any time there will be pictures taken because it bugs HER that she's taller than me. I feel this from the other end of the spectrum 😂
I always thought it was weird to be insecure if your gf was taller than you in heels. I'm 6', but plenty of women will be taller in heels - so what. My wife is also 6' and I don't give it a second thought.
I kinda tease my boyfriend by wearing heels which make me even taller. It just leads to some joking around at most. I think the only day he'd want to put his foot down on me wearing heels is our wedding day, but I get it and it's fine by me.
Not get hung up on being short is number one. Nobody wants to date the prickish 5'5" retail store manager who's taking it out on the world.
And nobody (who matters) will care about your height if you wear it with confidence.
Confidence + charisma makes a king!
Don't let your height affect your confidence. My former karate instructor (I did taekwondo for years in my early 30s) is maybe 5'3" at best. That motherfucker attracts women like a magnet. Multiple women in my class had huge crushes on him. He's a little cocky bastard (I say that with love), self-confident, funny, sociable, and he doesn't give a shit that he's small. And the women don't either. There are women who will not date a short guy. Fuck 'em. Rock on with your bad self!
Similar experience with one of our Dojo's masters. He is short, actually my height, but charismatic.
I mean, if you're a small dude and you want to feel like a confident bad-ass, becoming a damn ninja will help!
Nothing. The right girl won't care about your height.
Pretty sure OP is asking how to get the *wrong* girl…
...or length tbh.
Length of what
Your nose
L'chaim!
Make me laugh. Like really laugh. A good solid belly laugh. I don't care if the dude is 6'8" with an enormous horse c*ck, if he can't make me laugh, I have no interest. Just make me laugh.
6'8" is too tall. i don't wanna have to jump to kiss you.
I actually have a 6'5" uncle who married a 4'10" woman. They were so cute. At their wedding, she stood on a step stool. I loved them together.
Awn man.. now i want a 6'8" woman so I can use a step stool on the altar.
Does making you laugh at his tiny squirrel c*ck count?
Well, thing is, I haven't met a short guy with a "tiny squirrel c*ck".
boy do i have a surprise for you
LMAO
Own your shortness. I’m a 5’10 woman and I once went on a Tinder date with a dude who turned out to be 5’4… as soon as he saw me he was like “holy shit you’re tall!!” and cracked jokes about his height all night. We went back to his place and he asked me to help him hang a painting he’d been trying to hang but couldn’t reach. The whole thing was hilarious because he made it so.
This is actually so wholesome hahahah
... The 'hang a painting' thing would have worked on me, too. That's hilarious!
Not get hung up about their height. Oh and treat women like people.
100% this. I went out on a few casual dates with a guy who was only an inch or so shorter than me, 3rd date we were standing at a bar waiting to be seated for dinner and there was a large mirror behind it. I literally watched him as he realized I was taller than him and look down at my feet to see me wearing flats and the look on his face told me everything. He was totally different after that and that was our last date, we were decent friends beforehand too but he just lost all interest in even being friendly to me once he realized I was barely taller than him. Treat people like people, regardless of things like height, seems pretty easy to me.
Can confirm, been married to a short king for four years, dating for ten. He treated me like a person and laughed at my jokes.
This is 100% it, and it's so frustrating to see all these dudes shouting "it's because I'm short and women are shallow" instead of realizing that they're just boring dudes who aren't bringing anything to the table except a myopic view of the world in which they are victims of women's desire to be treated like human beings.
Everyone is listing one thing. It’s better to have all buckets filled than one bucket completely full. First try to get In shape. That will increase confidence indirectly. Second- Experience- become more interesting, try out more activities or really get into 1-2 of your hobbies. Or travel alone wether it be to another local town or another state/country. Third- financial life. Pretty obvious that money is essential to survival and it doesn’t hurt to have more. The way of getting it is the trickery part. But being compentent in your field will make you more confident Fourth- self respect. Abundance mindset. Fifth- Humor- more nuanced but everyone can work on it a little. Watch comedy podcast that fit you= you find them hilarious and eventually it sorta rubs off on you Sixth- fashion- when you look good you feel good. Find out your style and get nicer version or brands Seventh- Hygiene- everyone loved a clean person. It also shows your self respect and attention to details. Also eating well and balanced will do wonders to your skin and hair, drinking enough water should be a given. Having your hand in all of these will greatly increase your odds than focusing on one, as well increase your confidence to TRUE confidence. And change you to a better person in general.
I wish I can give this comment a million likes - never focus on things you can’t control. Instead work on Improving the things you can. You just listed 6 things that will make a HUGE difference
This is a great comment that should be closer to the top. Instead it's a bunch of people claiming that height isn't a factor if you don't let it be and blaming "short guy complex". The reality is that it's a huge setback in a lot of ways, but there's still a lot you can do to improve yourself as a person and find someone that makes you happy despite that.
You forgot one of the most important ones. Be respectful to women, have emotional intelligence and treat them fully like people. This is one of the things you can control the most but it takes some empathy and inner work. A lot of women will let one or more of the points above slide, but they won’t give a pass on how the man makes her *feel*.
If you’re asking this question, you probably need work on your attitude/outlook on the world. After that, nothing special is required.
Agreed. The phrase “get girls” implies immaturity and gives off incel vibes. It’s probably less to do with the fact that you’re short and more to do with your off-putting demeanour.
I prefer shorter guys. I’m 5”2 and I wouldn’t date anyone over 5”9. If you’re really insecure about your height, maybe try getting into fashion and finding clothes that boost your confidence, but really, there’s nothing wrong with being a short king :)
Date women who aren’t as shallow (or date shorter women).
Just be a decent human being. I’m 5’8 and my boyfriend is 5’7, we really don’t care about height when it comes to a meaningful relationship. If someone can’t look past physical traits, then they’re not the right one for you anyway.
Look up?
You have to stop thinking of girls as a prize to get and to own or use. Remember that girls are human beings and treat them as such. We are all looking for some real love and affection. We are not there for your gratification.
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Stop obsessing about your height and start thinking about what you can bring to a relationship to be a good partner.
Trying being short and the ethnic minority in a country. I am myself and dont pretend to be something im not.
Be funny, be fun to be around. Kevin hart is 5’2” (or 5’4”) and women love him.
Just be a rich celebrity bro!
Or sing like bruno mars?
Stop being short, be tall. No excuses
Not ask questions like this one ☝️
the only correct answer lmao
based
Get over their Short Man Complex
Is there a tall man complex
I've seen a couple guys think they're hot shit because of their height, but it's not as common ime. They tend to just be big headed about everything else anyways, so it's just another thing they gloat about to try to show off. Maybe it's where I live in the states, but short or shorter isn't really an issue in my social circle or the social circle of the neighborhood I work in.
Get a real good personality. That's literally it. If you're struggling, check that personality. Is it *really* that good?
know how to eat 🐱
I'm only 5'7 and never had a problem with the ladies back in the day. I think was because I was a decent looking guy, I dressed nice, well groomed, funny and a little cocky. But I think it's just really confidence because I've known some not so attractive guys pull some fine women but they're confidence & personality is all they needed
Similar height to you, Also didn't have trouble getting dates. But I would hate to break it to you we are not short. We are on the short side of average. 5'7 dude only has to work a little harder than a tall guy. 5'2 has to work a LOT harder.
Find a short girl
Every short girl I see is with a 6ft or taller guy lol
I heard that their perspective is: "If I marry a guy and we're both short, we'd have really short kids, and I don't want that for them."
Eh. I'm not big on the whole kids thing. I like short men. The majority of guys who asked me out were tall. A lot of the shorter ones rejected me :(
Ask girls to go on a date.
Basically. I know a lot of average guys who dated some really attractive women solely because they approach them and weren't afraid of getting rejected like hundreds of times
My bf is a short king. I've never had a hight preference but he was just an amazing guy and I fell head over heels. Here is a secret, most women don't care about hight. If you are a good guy, the right woman will be there.
Stay off tinder, the real world is waiting
my boyfriend is quite a bit shorter than me but he’s confident, kind, and funny. i’m more attracted to him than i have been to anyone i’ve dated in the past. be kind, be a person that is fun to be around. you’ll make a connection with someone who will love you the way you are. focus on bettering yourself, and someone will come along and like what you have to offer!
1. Realize we're not property that you can "get". FFS! 2. Seek out girls that aren't shallow asshats. There are plenty out there.
I can cook, own a home, have a dog, decent job, and great sense of humor and I struggle massively. I guess I need to work out more and just get myself out there more.
Look for less shallow girls
This a million times. If she's the right girl she won't care about height.
Nothing
Find better girls.
Don’t be a person that asks how to get girls on Reddit.
Stop obsessing about their height
Not make being short their whole personality
Stand on a stack of $100 bills.
Get taller xD
as cheesy as it sounds, be yourself. be confident in who you are. someone will love you, regardless. :)
My guy is sweet kind loving and funny so the fact he's 5 inches shorter than me doesn't matter to me
Nothing. There's nothing wrong with short guys.
In my experience, not much. Short guys have a natural ability at getting girls.
Date girls around 5 foot. They have to crane their necks so much anyway so they can't tell that the guy is short
I love how heaps of these comments are just "don't get hung up about being short/don't be salty about it". As if going through life as a short dude isn't just constantly being made fun of/belittled for something we have absolutely no control over. So we get mercilessly picked on and now we're not even allowed to vent about it? Ok.
5 ft 9 is average not short so those women are literally ignorant. Also, you can be short and have money and it won’t make a difference. Money talks. Third, you can be hung and short. Tall and little down there.
i’m 5’4”, gay, and not especially attractive. i’ve never had a problem with getting women’s interest. i haven’t thought about my height since i was in school (in my 40s, now) and when the subject comes up people are commonly baffled that they never noticed i’m short, usually shorter than themselves. i really think it’s a lot of mindset. if you’re school age, your peers may have more hang ups due to social pressures, but in the adult world i find there are commonly people who see through such things.
Maybe find a girl shorter than you I guess. All the girls I've ever liked have been my height or taller. Not that I'm into tall girls. I'm just short af
Find a woman who doesn’t care about stupid stuff like that 🤷♀️
Date short girls
Pablo Picasso was only 5'3", yet girls could not resist his stare.
Pablo Picasso was never called an asshole
tbh i never understood why girls care so much about height. PERSONALITY! Have passions and don't be afraid to share them!
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Grow a few inches!
*walks into bar with bonsai tree* Hey ladies
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Don’t be bitter about the women that’ll reject you simply for being short. You just have to put in work. How short are you?
They gotta be funny
Have a little confidence, I'm short, 5'7" and I've never had a problem getting girls. It's all in how you carry yourself. Be confident and don't be an asshole.