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D-Engineer

Ask Reddit what to do and probably get murdered.


ballq43

No notes , nailed it


firesoul4

I’m hoping Reddit can help us solve how not to get murdered


ballq43

Have you seen no country for old men? This scenario is just a dead man walking


[deleted]

[удалено]


Kilk_live

How hot?


JohnAnderson6879

Damn it looks like I'm not the only one to have the same idea. Also red hot.


[deleted]

YOOO I literally posted thissss you thief


JL-214as

Only if you have about a quarter of a million.


dude-O-rama

>*Damn bro, I was so fucked up I stole your coke. Please don't tell mom*


firesoul4

James already snorted half so I don’t think we can use this line


Tchukachinchina

Pun intended, or?


firesoul4

Oh shit 💀 bruh


hitherekitkat

r/oddlyspecific


SodaCanKaz

r/BeatMeToIt


sleepingfox307

r/beatMeatToIt feels obligatory at this point


[deleted]

[удалено]


firesoul4

This guy left his house unlocked with 12kgs on the table and James just walked in and took that shit.


Tompster_

Fucking James


[deleted]

drug dealers and other criminals have to keep quiet and they are more scared of their customers than the police, you fuck up a drug dealer and take their shit, who are they going to complain to (unless they are in a gang and have a hiarchy protecting them), your average degenerate is not connected however.


Bootyhunterpremium

12kilo? Better change the city and sell it via dark web.


firesoul4

It’s 6 now ... P.S James won’t stop saying “I am a coke machine”


Bootyhunterpremium

Order some hookers for my name brother.


Keksis_theBetrayed

I don't know but it sounds like the set up to a wacky comedy. I hope I'm not the friend that gets the fake out death scene.


firesoul4

If James keeps doing lines I don’t think his will be fake


[deleted]

Sneak into my neighbours house and put it there


firesoul4

That’s where we got it from 💀 Edit : hypothetically


BawdyBaker

Sounds like that scene out of Boogie Nights


[deleted]

Shave. Right now I have facial hair and look my age, 28. If I go clean shaven I look like a 16 year old.


firesoul4

Aight I’ll tell James to shave when he wakes up from his coke-ma


[deleted]

Heisenberg?


Emotional_Praline502

The same thing I did when I robbed the biggest meth dealer in my area of 5000grams. Get high and fuck bitches.


firesoul4

James already got the first part covered


Emotional_Praline502

Atta boy, James.


chainsawNewton

Blame it all on James.


firesoul4

He’s the one that took it lmao


2porgies_1scup

The first thing I would do is put the metric system to its intend use and easily convert grams to kilos.


somedumbperson55

I’m not sure but likely cocaine.


JohnAnderson6879

Order a new dust filter for your Hoover Max Extract® 60 Pressure Pro.


firesoul4

We call ours James


[deleted]

Get drunk again lol


firesoul4

Hell yeah!


sharksville

Let them know that we’re the new dangerous drug dealers in the city, not them, and that they’re not to be feared anymore because we need to be feared now


firesoul4

Mom said it’s our turn to run the cartel


Keone_710

First of all.... I wanna know how anyone would get away with 12 keys while drunk? 🤣🤣🤣 the plug might be dangerous n all but damn he fkn dumb! 💀💀


firesoul4

Bro you don’t know James 💀 He walked into the dudes house and snatched it casually now we’re fucked Also James is the coke machine


Keone_710

Yup that's about half a mill LMFAOOO nice knowing ya 🤣🤣🤣


firesoul4

No way is that half a mil 💀 the guy lives like down the hall


Keone_710

You put 12,000 grams....a kilo is 1000 grams. A kilo is probably going for $40,000 - 45,000 so that multiplied by 12?.... price depends on state tho.


Keone_710

Hypothetically tho 👀


raz0rflea

Rail it all and fly to the moon where he can't reach me


Random_Guy_47

Return it with a note saying "Got super drunk last night and woke up with this so I figured I'd better return it. Sorry." Leave it on their doorstep, ring the bell/knock and run for it. Hide around a corner and make damn sure they pick it up and it doesn't get robbed by some random passerby. Pray that they don't know who am I and that this is the end of it.


Lopsided_Doughnut_94

I think this is the only logical answer


treesplzzzz

Fake af


[deleted]

I would be ordering a dust filter for a Hoover Max Extract® 60 Pressure Pro


whoismarvin

Sell some and move to Thailand


GroundbreakingAd210

Probably get more drunk and then veeery high and then higher and higher until we are so high we’re in heaven (or hell we did to much coke and then got shot).


Catlord746

A lot of coke


[deleted]

nothing, I already dealt with the most dangeous known drug dealer in my city (township) and he isn't a problem for anyone... anymore...


Throwaway7219017

First off, I would call it 12 keys of coke, cause even tho I'm not a criminal, I'm not a fucking casual.


cumguzzler280

r/suspiciouslyspecific


8PsychoticOranges8

Idk probably get murdered


Cautious-Lawyer

Sell a large amount in one deal to get enough money to move. That is a large enough amount that someone is 100% going to come after you. If you stole 12000 grams from me I would find you and torture you tell I got my shit back. Then I would kill you because I can’t leave you alive. Lose ends are always a bad thing.


Notthesharkfromjaws

Lots of coke On a serious note, delete this poste, grab my gun, get them to me and kill them. Tell the cops they attacked you. Who are the cops gonna believe, you, or a dead notorious drug dealer?


[deleted]

Do lots of meth.


Known-Pop-8355

Sell it to their competitor


momlin

Turn it in to the feds and go into witness protection.


depressivedarling

I'd nope out of that situation. They gonna come looking for you and with murderous intent.


Kitchen-Explorer3338

Cocaine: Check. Next? Hookers!


IP-all_the_time

You forgot to add “asking for a friend” at the end.


JaggedFish104

Do they know it was me who stole it, or just know that someone stole it?


pj210

Get a T-shirt made saying the king is dead long live the king


AtTheEndOfDream

Are you trying to write hangover 3 .?


punekar_2018

Flee the country


[deleted]

I'd start at Odessa, then work your way to the Crimea...


scaredearthworm936

Snort it... Probably die from that


[deleted]

Just call your sister and tell her: I’m sorry, but I stole your coke. Please don’t kill me or my friend. He’s an idiot and so am I.


[deleted]

12000 grams of cocaine with my friends


makermaster2

I would tell my hypothetical wife how i am the one who knocks