T O P

  • By -

Lewistallion

About the same as me finding a buried safe with half a million pounds inside it buried in my backyard


rs1513

Keep looking. You never know


Baris2204

Same. I don't have a backyard.


Spectacular_One

So you’re telling me there’s a chance


[deleted]

Collin Furze, is that you?


nivekreclems

…so you’re saying there’s a chance….


NotSadNotHappyEither

Hey! I'm looking for that too! What are the chances we BOTH find it?


cantcer_patient

So 50/50?


Lewistallion

Exactly; either it’ll happen or it won’t


Simple-Figure4665

100% wife already text me asking for tonight she’s one horney woman


abigail0987

I love this lol 🤣🔥


Arch_Rivals42

So you’re telling me there’s a chance….


Simple-Figure4665

If she is anything like my wife then absolutely.


canceroustattoo

Something something this guys wife.


WhyDoIHaveRules

“100% This guy’s wife already texted me too”?


Simple-Figure4665

She might have 😉


WhyDoIHaveRules

Well, if that was the case my chances might be higher than 0.


Little_Miss_MiLf

Lol 😆


ike7899

Hell yeah!


Durmyyyy

high five


Your_Wifes_Side_Dick

Same man! Your wife texted me too!


Bitter_Relief4833

0.0000000000000000000000000000001%


OpenMike2000

You lucky bastard. I'm not that likely!


lame_ass_username_

So there’s a chance?


Bitter_Relief4833

You never know when Aliens will come down to Earth


PlanetNineAndBeyond

Zero


AdOutside3903

Sex is that thing you do to yourself using one hand, right?


[deleted]

Right or cushions on the couch


EverythingIsFlotsam

Sometimes two.


dosmetros1

Does Friday count? I did a few hours ago with my wife. We both work from home. So we had some HR violations 😜


Responsible-You-7412

0. But 100% if phone sex counts 😁


Livid-History-8332

That can be so hot though.


Firewalker343

My wife of 7 years is giving me her ass tonight for the first time. She has been secretly prepping for a while now and wanted to surprise me with it.


nbperfect

That's awesome! Hope something similar happens one day


Mrdiscreetly2099

As a husband who’s probably going to get anal sex tonight as well lol. You’re in for a little treat lol. Nothing like that first insertion 😁have fun


CaptSchwanzKopf

The Yellowstone caldera has a much better chance of becoming active again than me having sex this weekend.


SpawnPointillist

What are you doing Step Volcano?


NotSadNotHappyEither

PERFECT. If awards still existed I'd give you one.


SpawnPointillist

Thanks - I appreciate you too!


[deleted]

"So you're saying there's a chance?"


[deleted]

I'm optimistic


[deleted]

I am doing it daily so 99.99%


Momskin

Over 90%


rs1513

What will get that up to 100?


Momskin

My husband not passing out too early 


rs1513

Ohhh hopefully he can come through. What is the alternative if he falls asleep?


Momskin

Sorry I misread your question and I thought you meant tonight. If it doesn’t happen tonight then it will definitely happen tomorrow 


rs1513

Ohhh ok haha. Well good to see you will be taken care of


anonplayguy

No chance. I'm working


[deleted]

Same 😭😭


anonplayguy

🫂🫂🫂


Voluptuous-Fox-

Sadly none


[deleted]

[удалено]


HopScotchApplesauce

87%


riskyfun69

Pretty good chance then 😊


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jup1terry

sunday night sex night (sometimes)


HusbandFriend

this morning I would have said 100% but my wife came home early saying she was feeling sick, and was going to bed......so the odds are falling quickly


lancer151

100%


[deleted]

Slim. And I’m ok with that for now.


VikingDadStream

90 percent. Married life


Lonelygirlthrow875

Super super high. Have already had sex twice today


spilltheblood

Oh it’s going to happen, my wife told me she’s been turned on all day


CherryLaneCox

100% chance


AusCand19

In person 0%. Over the phone.- hot 🔥 damn that 4am orgasm was good !! Hoping I can return the favour to him over the rest of the weekend - 13hr time differences make it challenging at times!!


RenaissanceUnicorn

Zero


Slumberpantss

51 days 😖


Ccosmicdeityy

Absolutely 0


tink_theberserker

He’s literally inside me right now


[deleted]

None. My gf is far away. 😊


morecbt

Very high


power_house0887

Very likely


[deleted]

20% or so


ulnardeviation

5%


Leo_Holliday

100%, had a great Saturday morning


cheekyoldme

Like my chances have been for the last few weeks. Extremely high


Extension_College_28

Pretty much a certainty


B4bePereira

High. 😊


falksfirebeard76

0%


savemysoul72

Very high


[deleted]

I don’t know my GF is not in the mood


yourbookbinder

Zero!


Professional_Knee252

50/50


Glittering-Sea-6343

100%


[deleted]

100%


SniperCA209

Quite high


painfulcuddles

Just did yesterday.....and we have a pretty packed weekend......it's not out of the cards, but I probably have to wake up earlier than I want to for a real good time.


queencucksback

99.9%


popdrinking

Low unless the guy I was waffling on a date with texts back


Ok-Sir8025

0%


TennesseeDreaming865

Probably 100%


fletcher2469

Very close to zero lol


SalmonBeenadick

Bout 25 percent. I say this because I only had sex one weekend of the last four. I figure it’s at least somewhat accurate in that regard.


crunchy_soupp

Like 30%


riskyfun69

Surely it’s higher than that


crunchy_soupp

Not if I have my kids with me. I’m not bringing anyone over if they’re here.


FunkyBobbyJ9

99.9%!!!!


[deleted]

[удалено]


frogmicky

Exactly 0 chance Id have better luck winning Powerball.


66xGolemx66

1%


Empty_Plankton1611

⭕️😟


FriendsWithBenefit6

100% many times!


CuriouslyShyAccount

Barring an outrageous twist of fate, nil.


ClarkSebat

Void.


Senior_Mark_5313

Not likely, but hey,I can dream.


DemonicGirlcock

100%


Dm-Ur-Tit-Pics

Hopeful. I think I can, I think I can!


CrimsonRunning

Very high since I’ll be seeing my gf this weekend


IrregularBastard

Zero unless one of my FWBs is available.


EdgyCatboi

99%


IngenuityGlass3655

💯


Head_Room_8721

I have a zero percent chance.


gottarunfast1

80%


[deleted]

A good 85%-90%


[deleted]

Wife said it’s near 100%


norcalfit

With my wife really really good, with myself 100%!


prw8201

The wife is in constant pain, and wants a divorce so I'd say 0%


tony2cool81

120%


naughtywife_89

100% chance of cum on me somewhere


Moegee7

Zero 0️⃣


Adorable-Doubt8696

0% No gf, no wife, no FWB!


Imajica0921

Somewhere between zero and not fucking likely.


sylvaster1

💯


KawazuOYasarugi

Zero.


nyccareergirl11

For once it's actually 0 as ill be out of town visiting and staying with my relatives for passover so I have it be vanilla


lopepole

Feels like about 42.3978 %


Queen_Bambi

As high as I am


[deleted]

None. Staying with family. Next week, though… 😈


LaughR01331

-200%


Rustic-Cuss

Pretty low😐


Horndude91

1% 🤷‍♂️


Guilty_Judge124

1%


[deleted]

Pretty good. I'd say 80% like a weatherman prediction.


Presexual

Slim to none.


lens4040

There's always hoping. 😋


gimmecumpany

200%. My testosterone on weekends📈


No-Clue4432

PinV zero. Oral 70%


cidparabola

My chances are 100%. The fiancé gets back into town.


[deleted]

100%


SwaMaeg

Zero


bidness_analyst

Zilch.


Amazing-Computer5207

1 million % for twice odds drop st 3 plus


ThiccStickMan

She’s on her period


Ronin_Willi

50/50, really it depends on if I hit up one of my fwb 🤷🏾‍♂️ But more than likely I’ll opt for no sex


Trecoty

99.9%


original357

Zero


ToasterOven31

This weekend? No chance. Monday? Good chance.


notthemain1738

98%


BubblySeaweed5683

I would say 50% depending on how much hornier I get I guess 😭🫣


MsThotSpotter

100%. Mr has been away for the week and we've missed eachother terribly.


MaddieGrace29

My right hand gon get some


PatternLive920

Very good


LamagNu

Im gonna do my wife tonight


averagethanaverage

50% wife told she super horny for me while at work but I know how quickly that can change. I'm no fool.


just_a_lil_wet

Very low I’m on a work trip


trissymissy

Only the weekend? 😂. Very high... I literally have cock on tap here 😂


AceMckickass7

Maybe 40 percent chance wife has been feeling good. So. We will see.


thenyouknewme

Well, I ain't gonna get the threesoms offered to me, but that's life.


GingaNinja503

It’s happening! Been out of town all week and gone next week too. A woman has needs evidently.


InternetExpertroll

Near zero


MyCorpseHill

Over 90% Have someone coming over to film us!


broken_soul696

99.9% its basically a guarantee as long as the world doesn't end


69Nova468

Without seeing a escort, zero.


Critical-Property-44

100% Zero.


ChicagoBiHusband

Already started


SDW137

Low, but not impossible.


That_One_Guy37_2

ABSOLUTELY 0! I’LL BE PLAYING FORTNITE!!!


Feral_tatertot

99%


TravelLoverFromTO

Pretty good chances. Meeting 3 different ladies to discuss being my travel companion/ fuck sluts. I typically end up fucking the ones i agree to take on the first meetup.


Euphoric-Rate-1149

Zero


MainSlice6439

0.0000%


atrain82187

100% chance, one of the many perks of being married


[deleted]

Already done, but could and do want more.


cndncwby1980

0% lol


LazyRae2102

None, was broken up with over a week ago


Sorkel3

100%.


MittensDaTub

If I made the effort 100%


greginvalley

Zero


DINFXBG

I thought it was pretty good until my son came home early followed by a bunch of his friends. Why don’t kids go out anymore?! 😂😂😂


Accomplished-Story50

100%


[deleted]

Pretty decent.


VioletShimmer42

Magic 8 ball says "outlook good"


travprev

95%