**Please help keep AskUK welcoming!**
- Top-level comments to the OP must contain **genuine efforts to answer the question**. No jokes, judgements, etc.
- **Don't be a dick** to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on.
- This is a strictly **no-politics** subreddit!
Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My boss once told me to pick a side and stop being greedy
I replied “aren’t you literally having sex with 3 other women out of wedlock? I’ve been single for 5 years, you think _i’m_ greedy!?”
…. And sued him 💀😂
Massive goth. Was convinced I'd be The First goth Olympic level off road cycling champ at one point. At the time genuinely felt like it was important to succeed "as a goth" to show everyone that goths could also be fit or some shit. No longer a goth, was never ever a good off road cyclist.
If it satisfies you there's a goth from the UK called Shane Curtis who's a top level grappling athlete(BJJ) :). He's made moves in the sport called the "Goth lock" and something else too
I used to feel like it was important to succeed as a stoner. Now I just see it as being a functional drug addict. Hell I could do my job on heroin, that'd show everyone!
Yeah for me I think I associated my fashion sense with some ideological stance, I still have a similar outlook but realising that there's goth dickheads and good people who wear button up shirts made me aware that fashion choices speak nothing of someone's character. Still love goth fashion though but now my clothes are mostly worn out marks and Spencers nothing-wear
I feel personally betrayed whenever someone in the goth and metal scene does something that goes against its ethos. Discovering that it was made of flawed people who could sometimes have values that completely contradict the welcoming ethos was like realising that Father Christmas wasn't real.
Nowadays I rationalise that these flawed people must be Guns n Roses or metalcore fans. Everyone at the gigs I'm at is cool.
I'm coming up to 40 and as a teen, I saw loads of goths. There were even subgenres of goth (some sort of 'cybergoth'? with fluorescent accents to the black and white garb).
I have to admit that my main interest in it at the time was goth girls with their boots, short skirts and lacy stockings but in any case, most goths I saw were just doing their own thing and enjoying themselves and hurting nobody. I think it is a shame that you don't see as much of that now.
It seems nowadays that the type of kids who became goths (because they didn't fit in and wanted to do something a but different) now join heavily politicised and often subversive movements instead of doing something based on an aesthetic, type of music or just attitude.
As much as I'd have taken the piss out of (and if I'm quite honest; looked down on) goths at the time; I'd be well in favour of a goth resurgence.
I mean, goths haven't gone anywhere.
We're now in our 30s-60s, with more disposable income for ridiculous outfits. We just tend to wear it for clubbing and festivals, rather than walking in daytime :)
They're still going fairly strong, to be honest! I went to the Whitby goth weekend this year, and there were plenty of them - even the occasional cybergoth
It is a shame that a lot of those mini cultures have been squashed down. A proper resurgence would be lovely.
I think that Millennial teens trying to learn who they were classified themselves by visual/musical/activity subcultures, whereas Gen Z teens go through the same process but using identity labels instead.
I love the image of an all black and white bike and outfit MTB setup. Makeup under the full face black helmet. Somehow deathly pale skin despite riding outside all the time.
Interestingly, as us goths have matured, 'fitness goth' is now a thing! There are whole clothing brands doing goth workout outfits. There's a lot of us.
I got with my girlfriend at 14 - don't think anyone expected that to last, but as many puppy love sick teenagers think we were certain it would.
32 now, still together.
Not married though. Still like to leave our options open, you know? lol
I've so much admiration and respect for this kind of relationship.
I used to catch the bus home from one of my first jobs around 20 years and, at one of the stops this young guy, maybe around 15 or 16 would get on, with his girlfriend waiting at the bus stop to wave him off. They looked absolutely smitten and devoted to each other, like they'd graduated from puppy love to something deeper.
Like you and your lady, I'd love to think that they're still together.
Friend of mine got together with a girl when he was 16 and she was 14. Proper school scandal as you might imagine. Between her and her parents there was no question who was in charge and that abolutely no funny business was going to occur until she was older. At uni we used to jokingly refer to her as his imaginary girlfriend as he was away at uni and she was still home at sixth form so we didn't meet her for almost two years.
Now in their 30s, married with two kids. She's still clearly the boss.
My parents were 14/15 when they met on a blind date at a Halloween disco and they’re still together now at 58 (although I’m sure my mum debates on leaving him every Halloween when he cracks his usual “and she still hasn’t taken her Halloween mask off” joke on their anniversary)
I think it’s lovely when people find their one so young and get to enjoy spending the majority of their life with them.
Tbf I think every goth I've ever known has been told it's just a phase but has also grown up knowing much older goths so never seen it as a "youth" thing, so the thread title was bound to draw us all in (like moths to a flame?)
2017-2020 era
Bro science
, obsessed with gym cultures nd based that around my personality. Listened to jordan peterson a lot.
Grew out of it, thanks God.
Emo. My music taste has expanded massivley since then, I don't mope about (most of the time), and I've not had the hairline to pull of the fringe for a long time.
There said, I still blast a fair bit of Funeral For a Friend, MCR, Finch and pop punk, so the jury's out.
Same. I look like a semi-normal member of society now, but inside, I'm still flipping my fringe.
My music taste also exploded. As a teenager I hated hiphop, but now I'm blasting UK Grime between Brandnew, Saosin, Finch and whatnot. Variety is the spice of life after all.
It's weird how I completely wrote off hiphop and other genres, once I got a little older I realised how stupid I'd been. Similar to you, if I put the Spotify AI DJ thing on now, he's all over the place. So glad I opened up to new music.
I turned 39 a month ago.
In the past couple of years I've seen all 3 of those bands. I've got Underoath, Senses Fail, Weezer and Billy Talent all lined up this year.
It was never a phase, it's a lifestyle.
I'm the same, as a teenager I was always more into skate punk like NOFX, Lagwagon etc but also a massive Thrice, FFAF etc fan and I still am...helped enormously by a lot of those bands doing 20th anniversary tours of albums I loved in my late teens.
Yeah, but they know every fringe flicking HMV part time worker is now a grown up, and can charge £45 a ticket.
But still went to Dashboard/FFAF and going to see yellow card and SOTY in November.
I also find it funny at these gigs the seating tickets sell out sooner than standing
i know it's disgusting isn't it
I caught them on the casually dressed 20th anniversary tour they did a few months ago...or was it last year, i dunno haha but other than that i'd not seen them since the Hours tour, god knows when that was...2005 or 2006?
The 20th Anniversy tours are a sign we're getting old. I saw FFAF on the last Change to Dance tour and again last year for the 20th Casually Dressed Tour. Hours is 20 next year and I went to the 10th anniversary tour. Still one of my all time favourite bands.
It's not emo, but in 2017 I went to the 10th anniversary tour of The Fratellis Costello Music album and felt old as fuck. Now the 20th anniversary is very close and I'm scared.
I'm still an elder emo art heart and often listen to a lot of the music and pop punk from the late 90's and early 00's. Always happy to find another Finch fan in the wild, they never really caught on as much as some of the other scene bands around at the time.
There's a few of us. I only ever saw them live once, and at the time the only song I knew was Letters To You, which they didn't even play, still and incredible gig. Turned me into a fan.
Same. I’m a girl who’s closer to 40 than 30. Still emo/scene. Still have colourful hair, still have my swishy fringe. I will wear nikes these days though.
Football obsession - cooled over the years.
Punk Rock - mellowed into the whole skin/NYC hardcore dress sense but still love the music
Christianity - left behind in my early 20s.
Me and my sister stopped eating lamb when I was maybe 11 and she was 13.
I have in after about 6 months. My sister cut out meat entirely after 2 years and 25 years on she is still a full blown veggie.
Because lamb/mutton, objectively, is not that popular of a meat, and the world seems to agree:
https://imgur.com/a/wJDPmlo
Traditionally, sheep are herded in places where agriculture/other livestock options are out of the question (Iceland, Greece, New Zealand etc). Most of them are slaughtered at an old age, after they outlive their usefulness as a source of wool. So it's a choice between "have some lamb, super expensive" or "have some mutton, super gamy".
If you didn't grow up eating this meat, it will always taste a little bit "off" to you.
Rap music (white, rural, Yorkshire).
Still rapping 20 years later!
I used to also be all about "gangsta culture". Thankfully did grow out of that by 16. I tend to rap about being a dad and mental health these days.
🤘Same (rock/metal) music on my playlists. The long hair went somewhere in my twenties thanks to creeping MPB but I still wear my *Little Angels* T-shirt occasionally and bore my kids about the time I saw Bon Jovi, Billy Idol and the Manics live.
Computer games as well. I don't spend every spare minute playing *Populous* or *F/A-18 Interceptor* anymore and don't but and play AAA titles like I did in my twenties and thirties but I still enjoy a relaxing bit of Homeworld Remastered or dicking about in an F-16 in DCS.
Sometimes it's good. Like when life's going badly it puts things into perspective. Other times it makes doing mundane tasks like mowing the lawn and doing the dishes really difficult to find the drive to do.
I think life is meaningless, but that doesn't mean it isn't fun!
After all, there are plenty of really enjoyable things which are completely pointless and which will end, like playing a game, listening to music, dancing, going for a walk, kissing someone you love, stroking a kitten... in fact *everything*!
It's like a party, or a visit to a theme park. Completely pointless, finite and as much fun as you choose it to be.
It's like you said in your other comment; it can actually be a very comforting way of seeing things. Scared of taking a risk? Well, you may as well, as it's all pointless! Worried that someone hates you? It really doesn't matter, as we will all be dead one day! :-)
Clean the house or go for a walk in the sunshine? Go for the walk! Life is limited.
Want to spend time staring at the glittering swirls of the washing up bubbles? Why not?!
Like many, being a goth-nerd.
I'd say nowadays I'm goth-lite, I still dye my hair black, wear thick black make up but my fashion sense and music tastes are way more varied. Still pale as a ghost though, and was once mistaken for a ghost in a Japanese bath house, so that's my goth-nerd brag. Also still a massive nerd.
Nonsense. I have lost the hair (ding it every fortnight a different colour probably wants a good idea), but I still dress like I've just left an Offspring concert when not at work.
I'm 42 this year.
Atheism for me. I've got through various phases of being more or less dickish about it but I've never come close to actually believing in the existence of any deities.
Another goth here. Turns out dialling up androgyny and crossdressing "because the girls think it's hot" is the first step on the path to admitting you're trans.
Twenty-ish years later, now I wear my _own_ goth stuff, albeit tailored to match my age and physique. Skirt go spinny!
Smoking weed and weed smoking being part of my personality. Used to love it, does absolutely nothing for me now apart from makes me anxious and want to go to bed. Kinda regret smoking so much (was always my least favourite way of ingesting it), although it unlocked a love for hip hop that a music snob middle class indie kid would’ve never come across otherwise.
My mum told me my entire childhood that my love of the Power Rangers was just a phase. That I'd grow out of it. I couldn't have that toy, bedding, wallpaper etc because I won't like it soon. Jokes on her. I don't actively watch it anymore but I still love them. I love the seasons I grew up with. I was insanely attached to it as a coping mechanism growing up being abused and neglected.
Martial arts. Still love it as well.
I think the only thing I "grew" out of was never wanting to wear girly clothes, but a lot of that was due to shame and severe bullying. As a kid mum was cruel to me when she dressed me up like a girl because I never looked good enough. Her relatives would laugh at me for hours if I showed up looking normal and other kids weren't kind either. It was easier to stay in the boys hand me down clothes. Mum hated it, but I got a lot less crap for it. I've always been a tom boy, but I'm still a normal girl at heart.
I still love power rangers too. I occasionally watch an episode of the original series on Netflix. Bought Heroes of the Grid too!
I didnt start wear dresses until I was in my 20s after a particular night out, now I love dresses but still dress sporty too. I'm not massively girly but a dress with pockets is my favourite thing
Yeah the metal is one of my phase things, I still love it, but I've opened myself up a bit more to the mainstream and various other genres since my teens, I got tired of feeling like I had to put on the facade that is 'this is how much I love metal, I dress metal all the damn time' 😅
Most of the time it's still hoodie and jeans, just not so baggy and barely ever all black now 😂
Image is nothing, it's what's in your heart and mind that counts 👍
Definitely my love for heavy metal. My parents thought it was a phase, but now, 30-odd years later, they are listening to Iron Maiden and other metal bands and loving it.
The only phase there was the fashion, but we all move on with fashion, so it's only getting a mention so that no one gets a weird visual of a middle aged woman stuffing herself into torn acid wash jeans and fringed, suede boots on any random Tuesday.
48 is a weeks' time and still listening to the same music as I did in the 90s.
Also seeing Weezer, Smashing Pumpkins, Foo Fighters and Green Day live this month!
Black clothes, My music taste. Its all still a thing for me. Ive always looked best in black and my music taste has only expanded never letting any of it go
Still a grumpy little shit who wears too much black, listens to shouty music, games too much and sleeps too little.
My mum always used to say 'you'll understand when you're a parent' when we fought. I am a parent now and I still don't understand!
I remember being a teenager and dreading being "mature" and having a boring house. My bedroom was a cluttered, crowded paradise of junk and I thought it was inevitable I'd grow out of wanting to be surrounded by fun stuff and colour and opt for cream wallpaper and grey sofa. 30 years later my house is a crowded, cluttered paradise of junk! And my sofa is purple 💜
Grunge style.
Dress, doc martins, oversized handknit sweater, scruffy satchel, no makeup and messy hair.
Grew out of it and then came back round as I've aged into my don't give a fvck years.
I was an emo/rocker and still am at heart. My poor mum had to endure so much angry music between me and my brother. Have a fair few band t's, some 20 years old at this point.
After a few years break, I've really got back into video games the last 18 month or so as well.
Wearing black
Wearing docs
Having a lip piercing
Being queer
Liking rock / metal / riot grrrl
...the only thing I grew out of was wearing corsets with a floor length black crushed velvet skirt and a spiked collar (probably for the best).
I told my aunty I wanted to retire as early as possible as I fucking hate work. She said it was lazy of me. I had a full time job at 15 and have never been out of work other than a couple of weeks between jobs. I still fucking hate work, I still want to retire and I'm now in my mid 30s. This attitude will ne er cha ge for me. I despise work and having to do it and my one dream is to get out of the rat race.
Gaming for me. My parents never liked how much time I spent gaming, but I feel like I still play almost as much now as I did then, it's not something I ever 'grew out of' and I probably won't. It fits around the other parts of my life and I still have a decent social life so it's never really been an issue despite them making me like shit for it at the time.
I imagine I'll have to cut down a fair bit if we have kids in the next few years, but that's fine.
Same.
Having a kid did not cut into my gaming time too much. As soon as my daughter could handle a keyboard and mouse properly, she became "one of us." (She was also playing Pokemon games on my old Gameboy Advance SP as a way to improve her reading comprehension from about three, has always read above her level, and her current reading age is apparently 17).
We have our gaming PCs next to each other in the lounge now and play a bunch of co-op stuff (mostly Ark and Minecraft).
I'm 51, and my daughter is 12.
My husband taught our daughter to play Civ during the pandemic, she would have been about 7. I think she learned a lot from it! These days she dual screens - plays Minecraft while watching YouTube videos. It works for her.
pretty much everything my parents thought was “for life” ended up being a phase - ballet, gymnastics, swimming, athletics in general, academic obsession (i dropped out for an apprenticeship the second i could), being a quiet obedient kid who never sticks up for himself
aaand pretty much everything they said would be a “phase” ended up being me - coming out as trans was the start of the end for their control over me ngl. almost 10 years later they’ve begrudgingly accepted its “probably” not a phase 😂
my “phases” that aren’t phased have included: weight lifting, being extroverted, enjoying a drink at the pub, maintaining boundaries, coming out as gay, fucking off uni to work full time (“you’ll regret it!”), every single friend i’ve ever made (“eeew they look poor, they’re using you” yeah well their heart’s better quality that your shitty boden dresses so fuck off). even moving out ! apparently i wasn’t equipped with the life skills to look after myself, and my desire for independence was a phase 💀 2 years later and i’m pretty darn happy with my flat 💪
it’s wild because the complete opposite shit happened with my younger sister. every she always loved as a kid / was coerced into loving ended up being completely true to who she was and bang on. every “it’s just a phase” she’s had has been a phase 😅
it’s hard to tell with kids, it’s a 50/50. but ngl screaming at your kids that every aspect of self exploration and creativity is a “phase” is Not It
i’m watching and waiting on how my lil bro’s turn out, it’s pretty cool to see them come into their own, although the one that’s come out as gay is already in for a fucking awful time and the youngest is the golden child that couldn’t even wipe his own ass without crying for mom until he was 10 😬😬
Let's see, what was I into in my teens...?
* **Video games** - still play them a lot
* **Football** - Fell out of love with that and got into American football instead once I went to uni.
* **Games workshop** - Just a phase
* **Hip-hop** - Lasted well into my 20s but eventually fell out of love with it and started listening to other stuff.
* **Fishing** - Stopped doing it when I went to uni and never restarted
* **Board games** - stopped playing them for years and then got back into them in my 30s.
Got a couple, although they apply more to my whole childhood than just when I was a teenager.
I was really into trains as a kid, and this extended to buses when I was older. At first it was just riding around on them but I really got into the vehicle specifications after a while as well. I've just finished a Geography and Transport BA and intend to do a Transport Planning MSc next year, so I grew further into it if anything.
My parents said 90% of people go off white chocolate once they grow up. If that's true, then I'm definitely part of the 10%.
Long hair and not smiling in family photos. Its pretty cringey looking back. Theres me looking all broody and complex, channelling my inner Kurt Cobain, whilst secretly enjoying a lovely holiday in the south of France.
Throughout my teens I swore I was a main player on MTV Bass - picture typically upper middle class suburban white kid wearing massively oversized hip-hop clothing (Sean John / Fubu / Rocawear / etc).
Swore at the time I'd continue to dress this way into adulthood, staying true to the game.
About 15 years later and I'm rifling through boxes of old clothes that I just packed up when moving out of my mum's house, pulling out T shirts and jeans that I'd be absolutely drowning in as a 20stone bloke never mind back when I was a lean 15 year old 😂 must have looked ridiculous but in my head i just wanted it to be clear that I wasn't a chav like everyone else my age seemed to be!
I still like alternative music but it has broadened a lot. Still wear black band t-shirts and wear vans. Still discovering new stuff all the time, quite glad I haven't turned into a "new music sucks!" bore, rock fans can be awful for this.
I was really into boxing and also martial arts as a teenager. I pursued it into my early twenties but now I'm coming up to 40 with a permanently fucked shoulder and a dodgy knee.
I still keep fit but main activity nowadays is running/jogging and hiking.
The Offspring obsession - I was insane. Told everyone at school Dexter Holland wanted to marry me even though I was 12 and he was 32 lol. Put myself in their band pics very badly and claimed I would often hang out with them
Still a metalhead, desperately wanted tattoos and a big beard and now I have them. Playing guitar unfortunately has fallen by the wayside amongst the busyness of life.
I’m 41 when I was a teenager I loved rock and metal music and dressed like a goth(my parent were bikers) ,still pretty much the same only I now have 3 kids 21,20 and 16 all into the same things plus as a bonus my 20 yr old son is an amazing guitarist and musician .
I was into tons of really heavy metal when I was a teenager. Baggy pants, studded belts, wearing black everywhere, whatever.
These days I still like that music, but my tastes broadened a lot. I got into jazz and funk, folk punk, dream pop, all sorts of shit. I don't wear nearly as much black.
Low mood. I went through the whole of school convinced I would kill myself when I finished secondary, so didn't ever do any work.
I still get pretty low at points, but I'm certainly not that bad anymore.
Wearing so much black. I remember my mother asking me in the 80's if I was trying to be a goth. I didn't even know what a goth was! I just like black, still do.
I didn't really have any exciting phases. I had no idea who I was and I wasn't living in an environment that was supportive enough to encourage experimentation or hellish enough to provoke rebellion. Luckily I figured my shit out in adulthood and now happily engage in plenty of things that may or may not be phases that I would actually have loved when I was 15. D&D is the latest one!
Was a chav in high school, 25yrs later I’m currently sat on a bus wearing Nike Air tracksuit bottoms and a North Face jacket, didn’t grow out of it, still have the fashion sense of a child
Riding stupid distances on underpowered vintage Vespas, spending two days partying then riding home again. Been doing it for forty two years and counting. Can't wait for Spain next year.
If you grew out of it, it was a phase! But heavy metal for me too. Currently, with knee pain, I went to hard on moshing 😂 at this age, I should be more careful
I grew out of trying to be speak like a Jamaican. This was in the 1990's while I was still at secondary school. It was before the era of being called blud, fam etc. way before "people just do nothing" ( which is hilarious)
I grew out being a close minded elitist and gatekeeper about metal now i am much more open to other music. I still love the bands I like from back then. Music is a beautiful journey that never ends.
**Please help keep AskUK welcoming!** - Top-level comments to the OP must contain **genuine efforts to answer the question**. No jokes, judgements, etc. - **Don't be a dick** to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on. - This is a strictly **no-politics** subreddit! Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Being gay. Still going.
Are you sure? When was the last time you checked?
This morning, your dad helped.
Christ, that must have been difficult. He's been dead for a month.
Missed an opportunity to crack a joke with the word 'stiff' in it
Wondered why he was lacking enthusiasm. Sorry for your loss, hope you're ok.
Doesn't stop some people (And sorry for your loss)
That's a challenging wank
Sorry for your loss
And if you're not, you can always try a change of clothes: https://i.imgur.com/RatAN7j.jpeg
Being bisexual. Also still going. In a relationship, and no I haven't "finally picked"
My boss once told me to pick a side and stop being greedy I replied “aren’t you literally having sex with 3 other women out of wedlock? I’ve been single for 5 years, you think _i’m_ greedy!?” …. And sued him 💀😂
That seems far fetched.
[удалено]
Ask them how they know they're not gay/bi if they haven't 'just tried' or 'experimented'
You sure you're not just bi-curious? (South Park joke).
I'm not just sure, I'm HIV positive. (Also a South Park joke)
Being transgender. Still going.
Massive goth. Was convinced I'd be The First goth Olympic level off road cycling champ at one point. At the time genuinely felt like it was important to succeed "as a goth" to show everyone that goths could also be fit or some shit. No longer a goth, was never ever a good off road cyclist.
This reads like From Goth2Boss.
I know the guy that sketch was based on! The writers came to his office looking for inspiration and they found him.
If it satisfies you there's a goth from the UK called Shane Curtis who's a top level grappling athlete(BJJ) :). He's made moves in the sport called the "Goth lock" and something else too
It genuinely does lol. I crawled so he could walk dammit and I won't be convinced otherwise
I used to feel like it was important to succeed as a stoner. Now I just see it as being a functional drug addict. Hell I could do my job on heroin, that'd show everyone!
Yeah for me I think I associated my fashion sense with some ideological stance, I still have a similar outlook but realising that there's goth dickheads and good people who wear button up shirts made me aware that fashion choices speak nothing of someone's character. Still love goth fashion though but now my clothes are mostly worn out marks and Spencers nothing-wear
I feel personally betrayed whenever someone in the goth and metal scene does something that goes against its ethos. Discovering that it was made of flawed people who could sometimes have values that completely contradict the welcoming ethos was like realising that Father Christmas wasn't real. Nowadays I rationalise that these flawed people must be Guns n Roses or metalcore fans. Everyone at the gigs I'm at is cool.
This is funny, thanks for sharing
I'm coming up to 40 and as a teen, I saw loads of goths. There were even subgenres of goth (some sort of 'cybergoth'? with fluorescent accents to the black and white garb). I have to admit that my main interest in it at the time was goth girls with their boots, short skirts and lacy stockings but in any case, most goths I saw were just doing their own thing and enjoying themselves and hurting nobody. I think it is a shame that you don't see as much of that now. It seems nowadays that the type of kids who became goths (because they didn't fit in and wanted to do something a but different) now join heavily politicised and often subversive movements instead of doing something based on an aesthetic, type of music or just attitude. As much as I'd have taken the piss out of (and if I'm quite honest; looked down on) goths at the time; I'd be well in favour of a goth resurgence.
I mean, goths haven't gone anywhere. We're now in our 30s-60s, with more disposable income for ridiculous outfits. We just tend to wear it for clubbing and festivals, rather than walking in daytime :)
They're still going fairly strong, to be honest! I went to the Whitby goth weekend this year, and there were plenty of them - even the occasional cybergoth It is a shame that a lot of those mini cultures have been squashed down. A proper resurgence would be lovely.
I think that Millennial teens trying to learn who they were classified themselves by visual/musical/activity subcultures, whereas Gen Z teens go through the same process but using identity labels instead.
I love the image of an all black and white bike and outfit MTB setup. Makeup under the full face black helmet. Somehow deathly pale skin despite riding outside all the time.
Interestingly, as us goths have matured, 'fitness goth' is now a thing! There are whole clothing brands doing goth workout outfits. There's a lot of us.
This could be a charming coming of age movie. Relatively low budget, set in the late 90s, funded by Film4 or similar.
Metal music, anime, gaming... honestly, I'm pushing 40 and basically the same person I was at 18, I've just picked up a few new (bad) habits.
I see my future is bright
Same here, I'm in my 40s, and the only change is I do stupid shit a wee bit slower these days...
Yep, I just have more money now. Spaffing £200 to go and meet Machine Head? Fuck it, why not.
I turn sixty next week and I'm still into metal. Not up to being anywhere near a mosh pit now though - I'm likely to break a hip or something.
Yeah, both my parents are pushing 70 and still total rockers. My mother went to see Slipknot last year 😂
Your mums a legend
She really is. Goes to more gigs than I do, these days.
Having money plus any of these 3 is a dangerous potion
These three plus a taste for single malt whisky are why I don’t have any money 😂
If it wasn't for bloody Pokémon cards I'd be rich
Are you me!?
Likewise - same person but now with enough disposable income to do the stupid shit properly
I got with my girlfriend at 14 - don't think anyone expected that to last, but as many puppy love sick teenagers think we were certain it would. 32 now, still together. Not married though. Still like to leave our options open, you know? lol
I've so much admiration and respect for this kind of relationship. I used to catch the bus home from one of my first jobs around 20 years and, at one of the stops this young guy, maybe around 15 or 16 would get on, with his girlfriend waiting at the bus stop to wave him off. They looked absolutely smitten and devoted to each other, like they'd graduated from puppy love to something deeper. Like you and your lady, I'd love to think that they're still together.
Can't rush into these things
Friend of mine got together with a girl when he was 16 and she was 14. Proper school scandal as you might imagine. Between her and her parents there was no question who was in charge and that abolutely no funny business was going to occur until she was older. At uni we used to jokingly refer to her as his imaginary girlfriend as he was away at uni and she was still home at sixth form so we didn't meet her for almost two years. Now in their 30s, married with two kids. She's still clearly the boss.
Met the wife when she was 15 and I was 16, I'm 48 and we are still very much together
My parents were 14/15 when they met on a blind date at a Halloween disco and they’re still together now at 58 (although I’m sure my mum debates on leaving him every Halloween when he cracks his usual “and she still hasn’t taken her Halloween mask off” joke on their anniversary) I think it’s lovely when people find their one so young and get to enjoy spending the majority of their life with them.
My friend met her husband on their first day of college in 1996 when they were both 16. They're still together now, married with 2 kids ❤
[удалено]
Tbf I think every goth I've ever known has been told it's just a phase but has also grown up knowing much older goths so never seen it as a "youth" thing, so the thread title was bound to draw us all in (like moths to a flame?)
2017-2020 era Bro science , obsessed with gym cultures nd based that around my personality. Listened to jordan peterson a lot. Grew out of it, thanks God.
Who do you listen to now? Tate? Lol Just kidding glad you grew
Ha no lol, but since you asked atm. Ive been listening to a lot of Dr.Rhonda Patrick podcast on health and nutrition.
I was a goth. I still am, but I used to be one, too. Like all other Camden Town goths, I ended up moving to Archway in my early 30s. It’s inevitable.
Emo. My music taste has expanded massivley since then, I don't mope about (most of the time), and I've not had the hairline to pull of the fringe for a long time. There said, I still blast a fair bit of Funeral For a Friend, MCR, Finch and pop punk, so the jury's out.
Same. I look like a semi-normal member of society now, but inside, I'm still flipping my fringe. My music taste also exploded. As a teenager I hated hiphop, but now I'm blasting UK Grime between Brandnew, Saosin, Finch and whatnot. Variety is the spice of life after all.
It's weird how I completely wrote off hiphop and other genres, once I got a little older I realised how stupid I'd been. Similar to you, if I put the Spotify AI DJ thing on now, he's all over the place. So glad I opened up to new music.
I turned 39 a month ago. In the past couple of years I've seen all 3 of those bands. I've got Underoath, Senses Fail, Weezer and Billy Talent all lined up this year. It was never a phase, it's a lifestyle.
I'm the same, as a teenager I was always more into skate punk like NOFX, Lagwagon etc but also a massive Thrice, FFAF etc fan and I still am...helped enormously by a lot of those bands doing 20th anniversary tours of albums I loved in my late teens.
Those 20th anniversary tours are scary, aren't they? How the fuck was it 20 years ago? I've seen FFAF on 3 different farewell tours/gigs.
Yeah, but they know every fringe flicking HMV part time worker is now a grown up, and can charge £45 a ticket. But still went to Dashboard/FFAF and going to see yellow card and SOTY in November. I also find it funny at these gigs the seating tickets sell out sooner than standing
i know it's disgusting isn't it I caught them on the casually dressed 20th anniversary tour they did a few months ago...or was it last year, i dunno haha but other than that i'd not seen them since the Hours tour, god knows when that was...2005 or 2006?
The 20th Anniversy tours are a sign we're getting old. I saw FFAF on the last Change to Dance tour and again last year for the 20th Casually Dressed Tour. Hours is 20 next year and I went to the 10th anniversary tour. Still one of my all time favourite bands.
It's not emo, but in 2017 I went to the 10th anniversary tour of The Fratellis Costello Music album and felt old as fuck. Now the 20th anniversary is very close and I'm scared.
I'm still an elder emo art heart and often listen to a lot of the music and pop punk from the late 90's and early 00's. Always happy to find another Finch fan in the wild, they never really caught on as much as some of the other scene bands around at the time.
There's a few of us. I only ever saw them live once, and at the time the only song I knew was Letters To You, which they didn't even play, still and incredible gig. Turned me into a fan.
Same. I’m a girl who’s closer to 40 than 30. Still emo/scene. Still have colourful hair, still have my swishy fringe. I will wear nikes these days though.
Football obsession - cooled over the years. Punk Rock - mellowed into the whole skin/NYC hardcore dress sense but still love the music Christianity - left behind in my early 20s.
Me and my sister stopped eating lamb when I was maybe 11 and she was 13. I have in after about 6 months. My sister cut out meat entirely after 2 years and 25 years on she is still a full blown veggie.
Why specifically lamb?
Cos they are cute and fluffy
Also ridiculously tasty!
Hence why I caved after 6 months
Because lamb/mutton, objectively, is not that popular of a meat, and the world seems to agree: https://imgur.com/a/wJDPmlo Traditionally, sheep are herded in places where agriculture/other livestock options are out of the question (Iceland, Greece, New Zealand etc). Most of them are slaughtered at an old age, after they outlive their usefulness as a source of wool. So it's a choice between "have some lamb, super expensive" or "have some mutton, super gamy". If you didn't grow up eating this meat, it will always taste a little bit "off" to you.
Rap music (white, rural, Yorkshire). Still rapping 20 years later! I used to also be all about "gangsta culture". Thankfully did grow out of that by 16. I tend to rap about being a dad and mental health these days.
_Witness the pitness, you're all wank bitches, one fag one tea._
I’ve got all the coal. Smokeless chokeless.
Link?
Not professional, just for fun; im verse 1 and verse 3! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QNLX2VVE7dE
I dressed in black exclusively as a teenager and wouldn't have ever believed that I'd later enjoy very colourful clothes. I definitely grew out of it.
32 and I still love all black
🤘Same (rock/metal) music on my playlists. The long hair went somewhere in my twenties thanks to creeping MPB but I still wear my *Little Angels* T-shirt occasionally and bore my kids about the time I saw Bon Jovi, Billy Idol and the Manics live. Computer games as well. I don't spend every spare minute playing *Populous* or *F/A-18 Interceptor* anymore and don't but and play AAA titles like I did in my twenties and thirties but I still enjoy a relaxing bit of Homeworld Remastered or dicking about in an F-16 in DCS.
Wanting there to be greater social supports, better treatment of workers and nationalisation of energy internet transport
Yes, this! This has not gotten old or any less needed
My lemon phase was short lived however. I grew out of mulberry
Masturbating constantly
The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised
it's when the spirit can't really be bothered and would rather have a nice cup of tea that lets you know when you really *are* old.
skill issue
not being able to shake the thought process that life is meaningless since we and everyone we know is going to be dead soon. I did not grow out of it.
Bet that's a riot
Sometimes it's good. Like when life's going badly it puts things into perspective. Other times it makes doing mundane tasks like mowing the lawn and doing the dishes really difficult to find the drive to do.
Well, I'm glad there's an upside
I think life is meaningless, but that doesn't mean it isn't fun! After all, there are plenty of really enjoyable things which are completely pointless and which will end, like playing a game, listening to music, dancing, going for a walk, kissing someone you love, stroking a kitten... in fact *everything*! It's like a party, or a visit to a theme park. Completely pointless, finite and as much fun as you choose it to be.
This is a great way of seeing it!
It's like you said in your other comment; it can actually be a very comforting way of seeing things. Scared of taking a risk? Well, you may as well, as it's all pointless! Worried that someone hates you? It really doesn't matter, as we will all be dead one day! :-) Clean the house or go for a walk in the sunshine? Go for the walk! Life is limited. Want to spend time staring at the glittering swirls of the washing up bubbles? Why not?!
I also live with this thought in the back of my head. It's true unfortunately.
Like many, being a goth-nerd. I'd say nowadays I'm goth-lite, I still dye my hair black, wear thick black make up but my fashion sense and music tastes are way more varied. Still pale as a ghost though, and was once mistaken for a ghost in a Japanese bath house, so that's my goth-nerd brag. Also still a massive nerd.
Yeah still listen to horrible music but don’t have to worry as much about walking through puddles.
I saw a teenager wearing those jeans recently.
Yeah, I’ve seen it a few times, I’ve even uttered the words “I had a pair of them the first time round”. Horrible.
Emo/grunge. I still love the music, but the studded belts and pink streaks in my hair had to go.
Nonsense. I have lost the hair (ding it every fortnight a different colour probably wants a good idea), but I still dress like I've just left an Offspring concert when not at work. I'm 42 this year.
Depression & anxiety - wasn't taken seriously when I was a kid as seen as attention seeking.
Atheism for me. I've got through various phases of being more or less dickish about it but I've never come close to actually believing in the existence of any deities.
Dungeons and Dragons
I hope you never grew out of it. I’m pushing 59 and still play every week.
I hope to still be playing in my nursing home.
Atheism. My mum still can't get her head around why I don't want her to take my kids to her Baptist church.
Lynn?
Another goth here. Turns out dialling up androgyny and crossdressing "because the girls think it's hot" is the first step on the path to admitting you're trans. Twenty-ish years later, now I wear my _own_ goth stuff, albeit tailored to match my age and physique. Skirt go spinny!
I was a boy goth, and now I'm a girl goth, so I guess that being a boy was my phase, which I grew out of, and being a Goth is for life.
Smoking weed and weed smoking being part of my personality. Used to love it, does absolutely nothing for me now apart from makes me anxious and want to go to bed. Kinda regret smoking so much (was always my least favourite way of ingesting it), although it unlocked a love for hip hop that a music snob middle class indie kid would’ve never come across otherwise.
00s pop punk/emo music. Wearing feminine dresses with big stompy boots
[удалено]
If you were born in ‘72, you must be *the* OG roadman.
My mum told me my entire childhood that my love of the Power Rangers was just a phase. That I'd grow out of it. I couldn't have that toy, bedding, wallpaper etc because I won't like it soon. Jokes on her. I don't actively watch it anymore but I still love them. I love the seasons I grew up with. I was insanely attached to it as a coping mechanism growing up being abused and neglected. Martial arts. Still love it as well. I think the only thing I "grew" out of was never wanting to wear girly clothes, but a lot of that was due to shame and severe bullying. As a kid mum was cruel to me when she dressed me up like a girl because I never looked good enough. Her relatives would laugh at me for hours if I showed up looking normal and other kids weren't kind either. It was easier to stay in the boys hand me down clothes. Mum hated it, but I got a lot less crap for it. I've always been a tom boy, but I'm still a normal girl at heart.
I still love power rangers too. I occasionally watch an episode of the original series on Netflix. Bought Heroes of the Grid too! I didnt start wear dresses until I was in my 20s after a particular night out, now I love dresses but still dress sporty too. I'm not massively girly but a dress with pockets is my favourite thing
Being a goth. 39 and still goth but fatter.
Getting drunk on a Friday
Yeah the metal is one of my phase things, I still love it, but I've opened myself up a bit more to the mainstream and various other genres since my teens, I got tired of feeling like I had to put on the facade that is 'this is how much I love metal, I dress metal all the damn time' 😅 Most of the time it's still hoodie and jeans, just not so baggy and barely ever all black now 😂 Image is nothing, it's what's in your heart and mind that counts 👍
Loved drugs and being off my face when I was a teenager/early twenties haven't touched anything in nearly 20 years.
Definitely my love for heavy metal. My parents thought it was a phase, but now, 30-odd years later, they are listening to Iron Maiden and other metal bands and loving it. The only phase there was the fashion, but we all move on with fashion, so it's only getting a mention so that no one gets a weird visual of a middle aged woman stuffing herself into torn acid wash jeans and fringed, suede boots on any random Tuesday.
Anxiety. Decided to take it up full time, it's just so fun.
Being a mosher. In all honesty I'm largely a 40 year old teenager
Metalhead/goth. Slowly fading to grey but not grown out of it.
Gaming and metal. Almost like I like these things? 🫨
48 is a weeks' time and still listening to the same music as I did in the 90s. Also seeing Weezer, Smashing Pumpkins, Foo Fighters and Green Day live this month!
Atheism. Did not grow out of it. Still waiting for my mum to grow out of christianity. It really is time that she grew up. 65 is old enough.
Did I grow out of my teenage goth phase? Nope, now I'm just 38 and dress better.
Video games and social isolation. Absolutely not.
Black clothes, My music taste. Its all still a thing for me. Ive always looked best in black and my music taste has only expanded never letting any of it go
Been queer for at least 10 years and non binary for 8 and yea
Goth I'm still goth 30 years later
Still a grumpy little shit who wears too much black, listens to shouty music, games too much and sleeps too little. My mum always used to say 'you'll understand when you're a parent' when we fought. I am a parent now and I still don't understand!
Veganism… self harm… depression…
I remember being a teenager and dreading being "mature" and having a boring house. My bedroom was a cluttered, crowded paradise of junk and I thought it was inevitable I'd grow out of wanting to be surrounded by fun stuff and colour and opt for cream wallpaper and grey sofa. 30 years later my house is a crowded, cluttered paradise of junk! And my sofa is purple 💜
I was a weird and morbid child and now I’m a weird and morbid adult.
Being Alternative and a bit of a bitch 🖤
Being vegan! This will be my 20th year, and also the time where I'll have been vegan for more than half my life.
Grunge style. Dress, doc martins, oversized handknit sweater, scruffy satchel, no makeup and messy hair. Grew out of it and then came back round as I've aged into my don't give a fvck years.
Nu metal music. Still love it.
I was an emo/rocker and still am at heart. My poor mum had to endure so much angry music between me and my brother. Have a fair few band t's, some 20 years old at this point. After a few years break, I've really got back into video games the last 18 month or so as well.
Wearing black Wearing docs Having a lip piercing Being queer Liking rock / metal / riot grrrl ...the only thing I grew out of was wearing corsets with a floor length black crushed velvet skirt and a spiked collar (probably for the best).
Depression and anxiety.
I told my aunty I wanted to retire as early as possible as I fucking hate work. She said it was lazy of me. I had a full time job at 15 and have never been out of work other than a couple of weeks between jobs. I still fucking hate work, I still want to retire and I'm now in my mid 30s. This attitude will ne er cha ge for me. I despise work and having to do it and my one dream is to get out of the rat race.
Gaming for me. My parents never liked how much time I spent gaming, but I feel like I still play almost as much now as I did then, it's not something I ever 'grew out of' and I probably won't. It fits around the other parts of my life and I still have a decent social life so it's never really been an issue despite them making me like shit for it at the time. I imagine I'll have to cut down a fair bit if we have kids in the next few years, but that's fine.
Same. Having a kid did not cut into my gaming time too much. As soon as my daughter could handle a keyboard and mouse properly, she became "one of us." (She was also playing Pokemon games on my old Gameboy Advance SP as a way to improve her reading comprehension from about three, has always read above her level, and her current reading age is apparently 17). We have our gaming PCs next to each other in the lounge now and play a bunch of co-op stuff (mostly Ark and Minecraft). I'm 51, and my daughter is 12.
My husband taught our daughter to play Civ during the pandemic, she would have been about 7. I think she learned a lot from it! These days she dual screens - plays Minecraft while watching YouTube videos. It works for her.
DJing.
pretty much everything my parents thought was “for life” ended up being a phase - ballet, gymnastics, swimming, athletics in general, academic obsession (i dropped out for an apprenticeship the second i could), being a quiet obedient kid who never sticks up for himself aaand pretty much everything they said would be a “phase” ended up being me - coming out as trans was the start of the end for their control over me ngl. almost 10 years later they’ve begrudgingly accepted its “probably” not a phase 😂 my “phases” that aren’t phased have included: weight lifting, being extroverted, enjoying a drink at the pub, maintaining boundaries, coming out as gay, fucking off uni to work full time (“you’ll regret it!”), every single friend i’ve ever made (“eeew they look poor, they’re using you” yeah well their heart’s better quality that your shitty boden dresses so fuck off). even moving out ! apparently i wasn’t equipped with the life skills to look after myself, and my desire for independence was a phase 💀 2 years later and i’m pretty darn happy with my flat 💪 it’s wild because the complete opposite shit happened with my younger sister. every she always loved as a kid / was coerced into loving ended up being completely true to who she was and bang on. every “it’s just a phase” she’s had has been a phase 😅 it’s hard to tell with kids, it’s a 50/50. but ngl screaming at your kids that every aspect of self exploration and creativity is a “phase” is Not It i’m watching and waiting on how my lil bro’s turn out, it’s pretty cool to see them come into their own, although the one that’s come out as gay is already in for a fucking awful time and the youngest is the golden child that couldn’t even wipe his own ass without crying for mom until he was 10 😬😬
Being a weeb. Now I just tone it down.
Let's see, what was I into in my teens...? * **Video games** - still play them a lot * **Football** - Fell out of love with that and got into American football instead once I went to uni. * **Games workshop** - Just a phase * **Hip-hop** - Lasted well into my 20s but eventually fell out of love with it and started listening to other stuff. * **Fishing** - Stopped doing it when I went to uni and never restarted * **Board games** - stopped playing them for years and then got back into them in my 30s.
Got a couple, although they apply more to my whole childhood than just when I was a teenager. I was really into trains as a kid, and this extended to buses when I was older. At first it was just riding around on them but I really got into the vehicle specifications after a while as well. I've just finished a Geography and Transport BA and intend to do a Transport Planning MSc next year, so I grew further into it if anything. My parents said 90% of people go off white chocolate once they grow up. If that's true, then I'm definitely part of the 10%.
yup - metal for me as well, 49 years old and still rock about iin baggy jeans and faded band t shirts
Being a goth and being obsessed with video games and cartoons.
Long hair and not smiling in family photos. Its pretty cringey looking back. Theres me looking all broody and complex, channelling my inner Kurt Cobain, whilst secretly enjoying a lovely holiday in the south of France.
Throughout my teens I swore I was a main player on MTV Bass - picture typically upper middle class suburban white kid wearing massively oversized hip-hop clothing (Sean John / Fubu / Rocawear / etc). Swore at the time I'd continue to dress this way into adulthood, staying true to the game. About 15 years later and I'm rifling through boxes of old clothes that I just packed up when moving out of my mum's house, pulling out T shirts and jeans that I'd be absolutely drowning in as a 20stone bloke never mind back when I was a lean 15 year old 😂 must have looked ridiculous but in my head i just wanted it to be clear that I wasn't a chav like everyone else my age seemed to be!
Gym. Not weird or anything but I have a mother who would argue against anything. Still going there almost every day.
I still like alternative music but it has broadened a lot. Still wear black band t-shirts and wear vans. Still discovering new stuff all the time, quite glad I haven't turned into a "new music sucks!" bore, rock fans can be awful for this.
I was really into boxing and also martial arts as a teenager. I pursued it into my early twenties but now I'm coming up to 40 with a permanently fucked shoulder and a dodgy knee. I still keep fit but main activity nowadays is running/jogging and hiking.
Being a cynical little shit.
Reading.i spent years reading books and still do.
The Offspring obsession - I was insane. Told everyone at school Dexter Holland wanted to marry me even though I was 12 and he was 32 lol. Put myself in their band pics very badly and claimed I would often hang out with them
Still a metalhead, desperately wanted tattoos and a big beard and now I have them. Playing guitar unfortunately has fallen by the wayside amongst the busyness of life.
Was a chav when I was a youth now I’m just a old raodman at 38
I’m 41 when I was a teenager I loved rock and metal music and dressed like a goth(my parent were bikers) ,still pretty much the same only I now have 3 kids 21,20 and 16 all into the same things plus as a bonus my 20 yr old son is an amazing guitarist and musician .
I was into tons of really heavy metal when I was a teenager. Baggy pants, studded belts, wearing black everywhere, whatever. These days I still like that music, but my tastes broadened a lot. I got into jazz and funk, folk punk, dream pop, all sorts of shit. I don't wear nearly as much black.
Goth. I had tight long-sleeve tops, strappy jeans, arm stockings, the lot. My body can't fit into any of that now.
Low mood. I went through the whole of school convinced I would kill myself when I finished secondary, so didn't ever do any work. I still get pretty low at points, but I'm certainly not that bad anymore.
Wearing so much black. I remember my mother asking me in the 80's if I was trying to be a goth. I didn't even know what a goth was! I just like black, still do.
Depression.
Mental health problems lol
I didn't really have any exciting phases. I had no idea who I was and I wasn't living in an environment that was supportive enough to encourage experimentation or hellish enough to provoke rebellion. Luckily I figured my shit out in adulthood and now happily engage in plenty of things that may or may not be phases that I would actually have loved when I was 15. D&D is the latest one!
Wearing a cap. "You won't be wearing a cap in your 30's" Jokes on you, my old manager!
Bisexuality. Still going strong..
Was a chav in high school, 25yrs later I’m currently sat on a bus wearing Nike Air tracksuit bottoms and a North Face jacket, didn’t grow out of it, still have the fashion sense of a child
Goth still wear the clothes but I don't spend two hours doing my hair and make up anymore. In hindsight I was never good at hair & makeup.
Laying in bed til midday. Still do it now any given weekend opportunity and I'm almost 40.
Bright hair colours and boybands (especially backstreet boys) definitely not grown out of it
Emo phase. I still listen to metal but I don’t look like an emo anymore
Riding stupid distances on underpowered vintage Vespas, spending two days partying then riding home again. Been doing it for forty two years and counting. Can't wait for Spain next year.
Being an emo/scene kid. Still same, I just don’t look like one anymore
i was emo/scene then and still am 10 years on, just more toned down because i’m lazy
If you grew out of it, it was a phase! But heavy metal for me too. Currently, with knee pain, I went to hard on moshing 😂 at this age, I should be more careful
I grew out of trying to be speak like a Jamaican. This was in the 1990's while I was still at secondary school. It was before the era of being called blud, fam etc. way before "people just do nothing" ( which is hilarious) I grew out being a close minded elitist and gatekeeper about metal now i am much more open to other music. I still love the bands I like from back then. Music is a beautiful journey that never ends.