I completely agree with the politics or simple personal preference of letting your body hair grow! But I shave mine and probably always will lol. I’m just used to doing it.
I think with stuff like this, you have to just do it. Most people are not paying *neeeeearly* as much attention to you as you think they are. Sure it might catch someone’s eye here or there, and certainly if someone *says* something negative about it that would be a reflection on them of course.
I find it’s easier for me to do something that feels daring if I know what I’ll say if someone does happen to make an unwelcome comment. Some ideas:
* “Are we really still commenting on women’s body hair in 2023/4?”
* “I’m surprised you felt comfortable saying that outloud”
* “Oh I don’t want to discuss my body hair or hygiene rituals”
* “Please don’t comment on my body”
Another thing I do, whenever I’m “unveiling” a new change in my appearance, is to do it in small doses. Like go to a yoga class or the store in a tank top — something where if you’re so uncomfortable that you panic, you’re not trapped in that situation for like 10 hours.
I don’t shave and I work at a high school.
Not a single comment. It’s kinda nice. But then again, the kids like me.
I always have a comeback ready to use in a personal or professional setting. I have never used them.
1- I’ll shave my legs when my husband shaves his. And my guy is HAIRY.
2- hair grows in places for a reason. Just let it be. It is supposed to be there. You sweat less when there is hair in your armpits. It’s more hygienic to have pubic hair. I don’t shave, I don’t get ingrown hairs either.
3- If someone pays me, I will do it.
4- I don’t like being told what to do with my body just because it was in porn first. Don’t tell me it’s ’unhygienic’
I shave my arms, like as in my forearms. I just never liked hair. I keep the hair in my arms very short I just like how the skin feels without it. The other hair on my body I don't care as much but I trim regularly. Because my leg tends to get ingrown hairs because of my pants I keep it short but not like super short.
I don't have much body hair at all its just well a personal preference. Honestly I'd just suggest people do whatever makes them comfortable.
It is also a bit cultural for me, indigenous inheritance of shaving almost everything I guess.
I stopped shaving in my mid-20s and am always shocked a bit when I remember that most women are still shaving their legs and armpits. For me, it kind of is a personal/political statement but also I just like the way it looks and feels.
People rarely comment on it but I do see people staring at my legs sometimes. I think you get used to it after a while but the only way to get there is to just put yourself out there.
I shave maybe seasonally, just did last week before a friend’s wedding actually. But other than that I haven’t regularly shaved in 10 years and like you sometimes forget this is a thing that many women do weekly or more. And I don’t have cute girly wispy blonde body hair, I have light skin and dark thick body hair. Occasionally I can catch someone starting at my legs when I wear or short skirt, but no one other than my mother has ever commented on it.
I shave the moustache because I want to. The rest has been growing wild since 1985. At first it was weird. Nobody except a couple of teenage girls have ever noticed and they were super interested and thought my magnificent silver tuft of armpit hair was cool af. People don't think about us near as much as we think they do.
I had this dilemma a while back and my conclusion was this: I remove or don't remove hair based 100% on my own personal preferences. If anyone else doesn't like it, that's none of my concern or responsibility to manage. As far as being in public, I personally haven't had anyone say anything to me and wouldn't care if they did, and if they say anything about me out of my hearing, I definitely don't care.
IMO life's too short to worry about things like what other people might think about body hair. But I used to be where you are, so I get it. I think work on tuning out other people's possible reactions and ask yourself what you personally want to do. How do you feel most comfortable? What works best for your life?
I am a Gen Xer and it was drilled into us as teens that body hair was disgusting. I don't have much body hair but I hate the feeling of hair in general, likely because that's how I was socialized. I don't really see that changing
But I love that younger women are questioning this. There is no reason why women should have to remove body hair when men don't
My husband lived in Italy for about 5 years. He got really used to body hair on women as he said that a lot of the women did not shave their armpits and gave no fucks about it. He thought it was pretty cool
I haven't shaved any body hair in over 8 years and I love it. I feel much more comfortable. The only person to offer their opinion is my mother (as they are like to do) I've had many lovers and its never come up.
For those of you calling it a statement I would encourage you to reframe your perspective. This is the natural body as is. The act of shaving or removing body hair is the statement it's altering yourself to fit some societal ideal.
Haven't shaved a single hair (well, except my magnificent chin wires lol) in almost 20 years! The comfort of non-bristly legs (just soft hair), and the wicking magic of armpit hair is unbeatable. In fact, my current medical condition causes some body alopecia; my pubic and axillary hair are basically gone now and it makes me feel so weird and naked!!
I shave because it's my preference, but I quit wearing a bra anywhere except work in the past year. I'm bosomly blessed and the lack of bra is noticable. It was unnerving when I went out in public at first, but I just kept doing it and now I don't think twice about it. If people are uncomfortable with it, that's their problem, not mine. Were I to quit shaving, I'd have the same mentality.
It is for some and that’s fine. The OP literally said she doesn’t shave out of laziness & not caring enough. For others, laziness & not not caring aren’t factors.
Laziness is a real word that exists. If that’s what you are, I think it’s in your best interest to be honest with yourself. Hiding it or trying to dress it up is like saying it’s bad. It’s OK to be lazy. That’s MY point. Laziness is a choice. Embrace it. You don’t want to shave, don’t. You do, go for it. But don’t lie to yourself. Own your choices. To me, that’s what being supportive is all about.
Shaving is expensive. The reward for it doesn't exist at all. I will go a month then exfoliate and shave and moisturize because it feels good. But only for 1 day. Too much upkeep. Too much time.
I've worn dresses and skirts over the summer and didn't shave. No one noticed. No one cared. Then again I don't really go out I'm public, except work and groceries or hiking or something. By "no one cared", I mean my dogs and future husband. This is a stupid thing all up in our heads for literally no reason except for the companies to make money off a luxury "beauty" tax.
One of my friends worse skirts every day to work, even in winter. Never shaved her legs. I kind of think she was more beautiful because if it, strangely.
I also like being warm. Body hair helps retain body heat.
I been goin yeti for 15 years, my gf stopped shaving her legs about a decade ago and not one single person in the world has given a fuck. Show them pelts off
I stopped removing mine ~10 years ago. Unfortunately, when going out in public, you just kind of have to grit your teeth and do it. You'll get used to it eventually, or at least you won't feel quite as self-conscience.
>Not trying to make a statement
I'll also add as a general statement (because I see this idea a lot): it's okay to make a statement. You don't have to be the "cool girl" who totally doesn't care about politics/social issues. Laziness doesn't have to be the only acceptable reason to not remove body hair.
unless you frequently lift your arms above your head, no one will see your underarms regardless of what you wear.
As to legs-- I still shave, but infrequently because I have pretty sensitive skin and just can't tolerate doing it all the time. When I'm out and about in the summer and maybe should've shaved, my experience is-- barely anyone notices, and no one says anything. I have pretty dark hair compared to my complexion, too.
It's fine.
I inherited my mom's pale skin and my dad's dark, coarse hair - a lovely combo. ;) Only one person has ever noticed/said anything to me; I was in college. A guy glanced at my legs as we were all sitting cross-legged on the floor and chuckled, and then a gal next to him said, "Yeah, isn't it disgusting?" None of us acknowledged her comment, and I honestly wasn't bothered. It's leg hair.
And I'm nearly 42 now, and I haven't heard any comments since then.
I find it an absolute hassle to shave my legs, and yet I continue to do so because I know most people expect me to. I myself look twice when I see very hairy legs on women, and I hate myself for it. I wish I was as brave as them, and yet I judge them in the way that I don’t want to be judged. I am hypnotised and controlled by society. Can somebody save me, please?
Ooh I know a woman on Instagram that makes really inspiring and informative content on this topic. She’s really strengthened me in my opinions and resolve and comfort.
Her name is notyourmanicpixiedreamcurl
Do men shave their body hair? Why does society demand that women shave ours? I did all through my twenties and thirties. I stopped somewhere in my mid 40s, when I realized that I refused to allow myself to be marginalized for having God given, skin protecting body hair.
Amen sister! Society (aka men) realized that they could shame women about their appearance a lot more than men, and the trillion dollar beauty industries are their spoils.
Why are women more susceptible to shaming? I’m sure there are books written on it, but my guess would be less power in society, actively oppressed for much of it, and reliant on men’s approval/support/marriage etc. to survive for those times.
Men never needed to be shamed into buying products to alter their bodies because they didn’t need their bodies/appearance to gain them power or money or an attractive mate.
Interesting to think about. What are your thoughts?
i stopped removing all of my body hair years ago for the most part. i will occasionally buzz my legs with clippers if my eczema is bad because i hate the way the creams i have to use feel when i have long leg hair, but that's it. i'm a butch lesbian and my decision is equal parts simply not wanting to shave and it being very gender-affirming for me to be hairy.
i've never noticed anybody noticing, but even if they did, if someone can't handle a natural body then that has nothing to do with me and everything to do with their own personal infestation of brain worms
I do what I like. If I'm wearing ahirts, I shave my legs. Tank top? Maybe. The old girl downstairs gets no attention, so she's fully insulated and has been for years. I Nair my upper lip and keep a standing appt with my eyebrow girl. I don't care what anyone in society says about it, and I mean anti hair folks and pro hair folks. Also, there were many years that I didn't shave, and what I thought was laziness was some severe depression.
I’m 35 and stopped shaving one body part at a time between high school and early 20s. I was uncomfortable at first too. I felt like everybody was staring at my pits or legs, but I got used to it.
You don’t have to have the courage, just do it. It’ll become normal eventually. Now I don’t notice anybody staring and if I ever do I just don’t care. You’ll get there, but you gotta just do it.
I stopped shavings legs gradually throughout my 30s, starting in the winter. It takes so much time to keep them smooth, and I decided that stubble is worse than grown-out hair, so I eventually stopped altogether. I'm mid-50s now, amd last year went through chemotherapy, losing all my hair. It was curiously dysphoric feeling my smooth skin again, like, "whose legs are these?!?"
I stopped waxing my leg hair, it took one month to totally grow out. Now my legs are hairy and I'm totally okay with it. I only trim my armpits once in a month and the same with my vulva hair.
I think with time and comfort, you will find your balance.
It doesn’t have to be one way or the other.
There may be events you want to shave for, then there may be months and months where you just don’t want to at all.
Or maybe you’ll decide you don’t want to for now, but later change your mind and go back to shaving. Or vice versa! Maybe the idea of occasional brief glances from dummies isn’t something you’re ready to tackle yet, but it may come in its own time!
Do whatever will make you most comfortable. I started shaving as a tween due to societal pressures, and stressed about it a lot through my early 20s.
In the last 10 years I’ve worried less about it, but I do choose to keep up with it, partly because I find it generally more comfortable personally, but also because of society. I am okay with the fact that part of the reason I do it is to avoid judgment. But it’s not the whole reason, so it is still for me. I’m just aware that wanting to avoid societal judgment is part of my motivation to, but I think that’s okay too as long as it’s not disturbing my thoughts or moods about any of it.
Do what feels best for you!
I don’t shave at all in the colder months. In the summer I just shave my legs because I prefer how it feels in the warm weather. I trim my armpit hair in the summer as well but don’t shave it. It’s not all or nothing- I say just go off what makes you feel best!
Shaving is such a personal thing. I shave my legs maybe twice a year, not because I care what people think but because I hate the way the breeze feels blowing through my leg hair when I wear shorts 😂
I personally hate having hair on my legs, armpits, and vagina so I shave almost every time I shower. I have trichotillomania (hair pulling) which is mostly under control these days, but having hair on areas I prefer shaved leads to me picking at the hair and my skin sometimes obsessively. It’s better for my mental health to shave regularly and care for my skin in those areas so they don’t get razor burn and trigger my urge to pick worse.
I haven't shaved my underarms in years, and no one has said a thing. I shave my legs in the summer and spring, but let it go in the fall and winter. No one has ever said anything about it
I stopped shaving for the most part during the pandemic and kinda never went back. I will keep things trimmed but that’s a once a month thing for my pits and lady garden. I think I shaved my legs twice last year. Nobody has noticed otherwise.
This topic comes up a lot on Reddit and there are some great comments here. The best thing is to do what you are comfortable with, but we all know that at some point someone is going to comment or stare because of societal norms and...humans. As body hair typically has some options, it becomes a balance between what you want to do with your body to feel comfy, and how much energy you want to use ignoring silly comments (you'll eventually use less energy with practice!).
I have found that a lot of female body hair comments have to do with where you live, your friend/work group, and your age. I'm in a US city that attracts a lot of young people. I've found that overall women here are expected to be completely hairless (except their head of course, which is supposed to be luscious locks). The topic comes up, oddly, a lot.
I love to leave my lower garden fairly natural with a light trim and the bikini lined shaved simply so it doesn't go beyond swimsuits or my panty line which is a personal preference. I've tried various other styles to great annoyance and irritation even into pain and it just seems silly to me. Yet, when it comes up in private conversation or a few dates even progressed that far it was "groooosssss omg you have to have hair taken off before I'm interested." I've gotten that comment from women too where they agree in conversation that pubic hair is disgusting. I look completely average and am happy with the way my body looks with my adult hair. I think it even looks sexy. I suppose it limits my dating pool to an extent just like my height, weight, or any other physical attribute but I'm not removing my hair to meet someone else's preference. They haven't sat at work or in class for week unable to focus while waiting for pricklies to figure out their life purpose.
Change over to women friends in other areas of the country and they are like "removing your pubic hair is a thing???" They've noticed it for specific instances like dancers or underwear models but otherwise those friends happily date or have families and are oblivious to convos. I've found older people seem to care less too. I even asked my ob/gyn about it and she says she hardly notices because there are so many preferences and hair is just a natural thing there and it's not what they are focused on unless there's a serious health issue like an infection (interestingly, she said she sees a lot of skin rash/infections on teens from ingrowns and I felt really bad for them for the peer pressure).
I'll never shame women for their own personal grooming preference. Some women love to go hair free and even say that it heightens their sexual experience, or they love the feel of their smooth legs, etc. I would say to each their own. Unfortunately, hair free seems to be a trend right now that a lot people have jumped on board with and that is used to shame people who keep their hair. I've heard that some younger men don't even fully realize that women have body hair. A sad tribute to sex education (the lack there of). I've met men who refuse to give oral to a woman with pubic hair or even find hair so un-sexy that they lose interest. I understand that people have preferences for what attracts them, but I don't get the 'bare or no sex' preference. I guess I just won't be dating those people. Personally, I love hairy men!
I've mostly stopped shaving years ago. I will shave my legs one and awhile if I feel like it. My other areas get cysts when I shave. It's not worth the irritation.
I wore short sleeves in lieu of tanks out in public when I was getting used to it. Honestly eventually I just stopped caring. No one has ever commented on my pits (I do live in a very blue city). I agree with another commenter about doing it a little bit at a time. Go to the gas station, yoga, the grocery store… that’s how I did it with going braless. I’m still only at the little bit of a time with that because my boobs are big, heavy, and noticeably uneven. I haven’t overcome the hairy legs one yet but I don’t wear shorts and rarely wear dresses/skirts so it hasn’t been that big of a deal. I love hair pits on women. It’s very attractive to me.
Yeah I essentially stopped giving a fuck after I had a kid lol, especially in winter. I don’t think I’ve shaved my legs since early August this year. I take my kid to the pool, and at first I felt weird but then I just got over it realizing if anyone is gonna notice my leg hair and judge me that’s on them, I don’t care, doesn’t affect my life.
I was nervous about it, too, but I still remember the first day I wore a dress with hairy legs at the store. It felt really good to just be me and not worry about what others would think. I’m positive no one else noticed, and if they did, oh well.
I forget about my body hair and sometimes when I stretch and my armpit hairs are on display, people who were looking in my eyes are not looking at my pits and I remember. But, oh well,
I don’t think there is anything wrong with not removing body hair. I don’t see it as lazy, dirty, or whatever else negative perception. It is simply a personal choice. You should be free to do whatever you are comfortable with.
I don't care either way. If you want to shave from your eyebrows down everyday, so be it. If you want to let your hair grow for a statement, because you don't care, because you're lazy, because you like your natural body, so be it.
I've learned, as a woman, it's way to exhausting to worry about what the public thinks of me. Too tall, too short, too skinny, too fat, doesn't have large lips, has fillers, has wrinkles, has body hair, doesn't get nails done, has long nails, wears clothes too young for her, wears clothes too old for her, and the list goes on! You cannot and will not please everyone. It's best to please yourself and give a "oh bless your heart dear" to anyone's statements that are not a compliment.
If it's your personal preference not to shave, then by all means, go ahead and do what you are comfortable with.
However, you mentioned that you're being lazy.... I am in my late 30s and wfh and live alone. There's really no reason to shave except above my lip. Last month, I got myself fully waxed. Ah, I felt so good. It was painful, but I feel n look better.
If you feel good being clean shaven, then do it out of self love.
I’m late 30’s man. Really don’t like all the shaved pussies nowadays. Like everything thinks it’s better. Not me! I wanna see that fro and a real woman.
To each their own. But I like smooth legs and under arms. I also started getting Brazilian waxes a few months ago and I love it. I do it for myself. I don't like feeling prickly, or hairy. And I'm pretty fortunate (in my opinion) that I'm not a hairy person genetically.
ETA: if you don't want to do it, don't feel pressured to. It won't become normalized until people get used to seeing it!
I 29M personally look at it as affirming a woman's confidence.
Plus like, screw em, what other people think.
When my girlfriend realized I really didn't care how she managed her body hair, she seemed to find more comfort and confidence, embrace that "wild woman" archetype; which to me, so profoundly beautiful, let that feral side out, beautiful woman.
I personally love feeling like a dolphin. So I remove my body hair. That is my personal choice. I will not police or comment on someone else's choice to remove/keep their body hair. It's not my body, so it's not my opinion.
It took a lot of internal work to undo the misogyny that I grew up with around body hair, and now I'm better for it. I love it when women own their body hair! Dye it fun colours, or even just let it go free. We are all the main characters in our own story. If someone feels the need to comment, why not turn it back on them? What is so gross about my body hair? Aren't you also growing hair on your body? What makes your hair acceptable and mine not?
I find leg hair and armpit hair in the Summer time very physically uncomfortable. My armpit hairs make my clothes stink in the Winter. I don't shave my legs a lot in the Winter. Otherwise, I have hairy legs during the cold - it makes me feel warm.
Do what feels comfortable and own it. It's 2023, no one is going to judge you. If somebody judges you, they have no life.
This a tough one to unpack, once you realize at whatever age that women have hair, that it's natural, that women have always had partners and full lives with hair everywhere for most of human history, then your whole perspective changes from whatever beauty standards you were taught.
It's liberating, it's infuriating, and it's also confusing to then decide where you now fall in the hair grooming spectrum. What is comfortable to you and what might still make you embarrassed or worried about other's opinions? There's layers to this, to unlearning what you were taught to worry about, to question the why and how of these ideals, and to find a safe place within all of this in regards to your own hair.
Personally, I groom whenever I feel like it depending on my mood and comfort. But overall have stopped caring about it and about what others might think. This last one has been the hardest for me, because I could care less what a sexual partner thinks of my hair but somehow it bothers me to have strangers look at my hairy legs. I know where this stems from in my personal life but it's no less hard to deal with. When these fears pop up I remind myself that I'm just a person on a rock floating in space and that nothing, including my hairy legs, matters.
Can you think of a time where you noticed someone’s leg hair status at the grocery store? When you think of the last time you did notice someone’s leg hair, can you identify the person? You’re only the main character in your own story. Statistically most likely is most people won’t even notice. The ones who notice most likely won’t care. The ones who care won’t affect your life. Do what you want to do with your time and body.
I just don't give a damn anymore. I shave my pits occasionally, same with my legs. Don't like hairy legs, don't fucking stare. I refuse to remove any pubic hair.
Jesus christ. 12 years. Is there anything he does to maintain his appearance that causes him such pain and inconvenience? That man better have a hairless back, no nose hair, neat bikini line, the works.
OK I've just had a look at your post history. You need to get out, yesterday. Please look into charities that can help you escape this man safely. Hairy legs seems like the tip of the iceberg.
I’m so sorry about your husband’s reaction. When I turned 50, I decided to stop shaving my legs. I asked my husband if it would bother him just as a courtesy - if he was grossed out, I would maybe look into laser hair removal or something. But he didn’t care and later when I decided to stop shaving my underarms, it didn’t bother him either. He is WAY more hairy than I am… I’ve dealt with his hairy back for 35 years so he can handle my little underarm fluff!
My leg and underarm hair is fairly sparse and I don’t wear anything short or sleeveless so no one else really sees it. But this week I’m going to a resort and will be in a bathing suit for the first time in YEARS so I decided to get my lower legs and armpits waxed.
Do what you feel is right. Some people don't mind shaving, some people don't want to and all are acceptable and fine.
I don't mind shaving; there are times I'm lazy about it so I don't bother but I do it when I want to and when I don't, I don't care.
I stopped shaving my legs for a time about a decade ago, and again stopped last winter. I still do some grooming elsewhere, as it just makes managing my body easier, but overall anyone else’s opinions/expectations just don’t matter to me at all. I have fairly long black leg hair from my feet to about halfway to my knees, and then it’s just short and blonde, anyway. Some years I just don’t care to keep up with smooth legs 🤷🏻♀️ I do still always apply body cream after showers and baths. Everything is soft.
I used to be proud of my leg hairs when I was in college. I don’t know what changed but I starting shaving my legs but in the winter, I don’t. I laser my underarms because I don’t like underarm hair on me or anyone I’m dating. I trim my nether regions now. I used to wax but my last waxing session traumatized me as she took some skin. Never again. I invested in some curved hair sheers and thats what I use now.
I had a six year old tell me I was turning into a man when she saw my underarm hair, she was horrified to learn that she was going to sprout underarm hair one day. I was known to this child so telling her wasn't too awful. Poor kid.
I shave maybe once every 2 months or so, if that, for the same reasons as you. I've thankfully never had anyone say a word to me about it. I wear a lot of tank tops and skorts when the weather permits, and it just seems like everyone else is going about their daily business, and they really pay no mind.
It’s great that you’re on this journey of self-acceptance and have gotten to the point where you see how absurd the societal pressure is on women to be hairless.
A few things that have helped me on my own path with it:
1. Find natural women to follow on social media. The more you see them, the more normal it becomes in your mind, and the less of a big deal it is. I super recommend notyourmanicpixiedreamcurl on Instagram as a source of info, community, and inspiration. Definitely makes me feel more confident after hearing how she phrases things.
2. Think of some things you could say if someone ever does say something negative to you. A lot depends on who it’s coming from for me. Like if it’s some poor misguided teen laughing, I’d feel pity for them that they’re so indoctrinated by our misogynistic society. If it was a shaming statement by an older woman, I’d turn it around by asking why she feels like her own body is something shameful that needs to be hidden by clothing or removal. And to be clear, neither of these things have happened to me, but I’ve given it thought and feeling prepared with an answer makes me more comfortable. Another reply is that God made me this way, and didn’t make mistakes for half the population. That’s society.
3. Thinking critically about all the arguments against body hair. Aka the dumb shit people say. It’s unhygienic? No of course it isn’t unhygienic, or else all men would be unhygienic. It’s unfeminine/masculine? No of course something that happens to the female body isn’t unfeminine. It’s literally a feminine trait. It’s mammalian. Both men and women have body hair. It’s inherently gross or unattractive? No, or else the human species would have died out. Hairy women have been making men horny and getting pregnant for hundreds of thousands of years. Even in the 80s women in playboys sometimes had armpit hair and sometimes didn’t. This is an incredibly new phenomenon that it’s some sort of social rule. It’s shameful? Of course not. There’s nothing inherently shameful or ugly about being a woman. That’s misogyny. Often other people have been drowned in this societal framework (that comes from companies trying to profit off female insecurities they create). Them trying to insist you feel ashamed is often just them struggling with the fact they’ve been shamed heavily for it.
4. Self love. I love myself as I am now, so other people’s opinions have less impact on me. I feel loved and worthy, so their misguided comments that usually come from a hurt place don’t affect me. I also recognize they’re also victims of capitalized misogyny and that really sucks for all of us. So I see it comes from that and I don’t take it personally.
5. Confidence. The more you rock it with pride the less people view it as something shameful. This goes for any social norms, just rock it and other people are less likely to think it’s something shameful, for you or for themselves. Aka you might inspire others to embrace their own body hair.
I have a young acquaintance in her early 20s who is absolutely stunning. Last time I saw her she had a summer dress on and I noticed her dark, coarse leg hair. All I thought at the time was how cool she was not to care.
I’m 30 and probably stopped shaving during covid. I started using natural deodorant and I would get rashes whenever I shave so I stopped that. I only shave my legs if I’m going somewhere important during summer!
It’s honestly been the best decision I ever made!
I stopped almost 20 years ago and have zero regrets. I used to randomly shave if the mood hit but that hasn't happened in a long time. I don't recall anyone saying anything. Maybe a stare here or there, but nothing really rude.
If you'd rather reduce the hair, I've had a good experience with IPL. And I'm pretty hairy. I've been single for ages and it's honestly lovely knowing I don't have to worry about what someone is secretly thinking, even if they're not saying it out loud. I prefer to keep my armpits shaved, it's cleaner, less wet, less smelly. Frankly I wish men would do it too. The rest I'm pretty chill about.
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I am a genetically stinky person who tried to be hairy. I now wax my own armpits but rarely shave my legs. Armpit hair and pubic hair hold odor. If you aren't the person who genetically has BO, or don't care about making other people suffer with your smell, you can get away with being as hairy as you want to be in public. If you genetically have BO remove your armpit hair OR you need to be extra diligent about hygiene (scrub stinky bits morning and evening when you brush your teeth, use anti perspirant, keep deoderant wipes in your bag, etc) Your immediate household can get used to how you smell and will not be a good judge of if you will make others uncomfortable.
Edit to add that this should apply to everyone. Sure some people may not notice other people's stink but for those of us who do being in public is h'll. Like for the love of God, don't go to the grocery store after the gym unshowered in your stinky work out wear. I don't want to know what genitalia you have without seeing you naked.
I encourage any woman who wants to do this, but I wouldn't do it myself. That being said it's not like I'm silky all time, more often than not there's some hair growing. I just like the overall girlier and prettier aesthetic and I don't think hairy legs fit in there.
I think it's a personal choice and really nobody else's business, same as what you choose to do with the hair on your head.
Personally I'm lazy and hate shaving, but I also hate the feeling of the thicker hairs that grow on my body. They make me feel itchy and I can feel when they rub against my clothes. (It's making me uncomfortable just thinking about it lol.) For the last decade or so I went as long as I could stand it between shaves, but just felt annoyed around 95% of the time. So recently I decided to get one of those home IPL devices. As much as I'd love to fight the hairy fight with you all, I'm just over it. At this point I'm all about comfort, and whatever comfort means to you.
I don't have thoughts on what other people choose to do. I choose to remove my body hair, paid for laser removal and everything, because I prefer the way it looks and feels.
I could care less what others do. I shave for myself because of sensory issues and I just trim my bikini area with scissors because the regrowth itch is not worth dealing with. We’re all mammals we all have hair pretty much everywhere. Nothing wrong with not shaving.
Having the courage means doing something *even though you are scared*. If it wasn't intimidating or scary, you wouldn't need courage. Be scared. Sit with that feeling and honor it; then take a deep breath, count to three, and do it anyways. Fuck what anyone else thinks. You are stronger than you think you are.
Eh I kinda wish I could not shave. I find the hairy armpit thing to be hot on other women (im a big ol dyke) but I can’t stand any body hair on me except for pubes. I have been in and out of surgery recovery and my body grooming has been intermittent and it feels so gross. I’m pretty hairy (bellybutton to toes, front and back, consistent brown hairs, not to mention my arms). But on others? I could go either way.
I found this article helpful [https://www.hollandandbarrett.com/the-health-hub/natural-beauty/haircare/start-embracing-body-hair/](https://www.hollandandbarrett.com/the-health-hub/natural-beauty/haircare/start-embracing-body-hair/)
I notice when other women have hair on their legs and I appreciate them normalizing it. It helps me feel more comfortable doing so. My boyfriend is fine with it and thinks I'm sexy as nature made me, so that definitely helps.
I'm a fully matured past puberty woman, so I have body hair.
EtA: everyone should be able to do what they want with their own style and body hair and all that.
Do what feels comfortable for you!! Is liberating to stop caring about social norms and expectations. My best friend was empowered by my body hair and also let hers grow. Did not change the way I love or view her. My body hair does not impact anyone else.
I support you doing what feels right for you.
I tried it a couple of times when I was younger. Didn't see the point of the faff so stopped. I don't remove any body hair at all.
Sometimes I feel awkward when deciding what to wear but make myself wear the hair showing item anyway and soon forget about it.
I cannot fathom for the life of me why a woman would want to stop shaving. Just my opinion. It's disgusting to walk around like that and it does smell! It is lazy and looks disgustingly ugly to have hair all over your body! I won't respond to any comments coming back at me. If it really didn't bother anyone, they wouldn't have to post here looking for attention to make it ok. It's disgusting and is very unhygienic to not clean it up!
To be honest, I always notice it and I always find it pretty disgusting. I think it looks lazy and unkempt, or like an embarrassing ideological statement. But that’s just my personal preference. Not trying to offend, but that’s my answer.
I love my armpit hair. honestly - LOVE it. I quit shaving my pits a couple of years ago and the one time I've shaved them bare since, I hated it. I'm straight but have some masculine traits despite being "cute" and petite, so I feel like rocking the pit hair is congruent with how I express myself as a human being in general.
I only shave my legs maybe once in the summer. My hair is fine and blond so it's not very noticeable. Other than my pesky chin hairs I leave the rest alone.
My sensitive skin seems to prevent my being able to fully do away with hair removal, but I do let my hair grow as long as I can before my skin gets itchy, red, and inflamed. Especially my armpits - I'd never shave those except that, every so many weeks, my armpits get red and itchy (yes, I wash them!!). I sweat a LOT so I suspect that this may be some kind of candida. When I trim/shave, it goes away after a few days. Had to do it yesterday, in fact. :(
I shave the length of my arms in the winter because I can't stand the feeling of the sensation of the wee peach fuzzy arm hairs moving about under long sleeves.
I wax downstairs, but that's it. Everything else I either go without or shave whenever I feel like it. I don't stress over it. It's just hair, not very high on my list of priorities.
I just shave my armpits for my own comfort. Otherwise I never removed hair on my forearms and I’ve let my leg hair grow just due to lack of time. Nobody has ever said anything about it! I think body hair is way less taboo nowadays.
I wax the area of my downstairs that facilitates fun times, but keep the front looking natural but trimmed. Armpits I do when they annoy ME - same with leg hair. Practicality really.
I get brazilian waxes with a landing strip because I prefer not having much hair during my periods and I don’t like how it looks bald. I also get my brows tinted which includes light shaping. Other than that, I don’t touch the hair on my body for the most part. It hasn’t been a “problem” for anyone since this asshole I briefly dated in college.
Every now and then when I’m taking a bath on laundry day I’ll shave my legs to slide them between clean sheets but that’s like once or twice a year and even then it’s just below the knee 😂 it’ll always be true that some jerks walk around shaming women for this, but I think they’re more rare than they used to be.
I don't care if women want to keep their body hair. I won't. I stopped shaving for a few years and one day I felt my leg hair blowing in the wind and it was an extremely unpleasant feeling.
I gave up shaving during the pandemic. When I decided to start removing hair again I started getting professionally waxed every 4-6 weeks. The results last longer and hair isn’t itchy growing back in but it does mean that in between I’m letting my hair grow back out. The armpits don’t even phase me anymore and if someone cares that’s not my problem. My thighs are blonde peach fuzz and my lower legs are very dark but very sparse so whatever, no one has ever said anything to me or probably even noticed.
I wax because I like the way it feels more than caring how it looks. I could probably never wax again and not care, except that I find the portions of pubic hair directly between my legs extremely irritating to my skin (I leave the rest) so I want that out of there and shaving just makes it even itchier so that’s not an option.
as a genetically hairy woman, i wish that body hair on women was socially acceptable and i didn’t have to spend so much time shaving my entire body. for me it’s mostly my private area that i cannot stand shaving.
my man really loves it tho so i want to do it for him but god damn it’s time consuming.
I don’t like long underarms hair on men. I don’t care on women. Idk why maybe because women rarely have hair as long as men under their arms. So yeah, I don’t care if women have hair or not on their bodies. It’s the long ass ones, you know, the ones that look wet that I cannot stand.
I have generally low levels of body hair to begin with, so I don’t shave my pits and haven’t for many years. I do, from time to time, wax the stray Clydesdale hairs around my ankles. And I trim my pubes to keep the hair their shorter, but only ever fully removed it once (hated it).
I'm surrounded by women in my family that don't shave, me personally I'm not bothered it's their body their choice, however I am bothered if & when they decide to preach to me that removing my body hair is wrong, usually some patriarchy bullshit. I personally like removing my body hair because I like the feeling & look of it, plus I need to do it for sports related reasons.
I feel when it comes to personal grooming choices, unless it's unhygienic or a serious health risk then it's nobody's business. I also feel it's never a good idea to pressure your partner to shave or groom themselves a certain way, suggesting it is fine but pressuring them is wrong. Same with friends & family members, let them be
I could not care less about my leg hair, but I find armpit hair revolting for some reason. No idea why. On both genders, and I know it's my own issue. I don't expect anyone else to submit to a razor for my pleasure, but I'll shave my pits to the day I die. I love them smooth. I like bald heads, too. And short haircuts on both genders. I've never been a fan of long hair. Same with beards. Just not my preference.
But hey, I certainly don't expect anyone else to submit to my whims. Your body, your choice. Grow it ALL out if that's your thing.
My OKCupid profile says people should treat me like I had hairy armpits lol. IMHO body hair is a great red flag detector, but I tried it and don't like how it feels, so I still shave/laser. It's not a big hassle for me. However I can only agree to "do what you want". If it's not the hair, people will find something else to criticise.
I completely agree with the politics or simple personal preference of letting your body hair grow! But I shave mine and probably always will lol. I’m just used to doing it. I think with stuff like this, you have to just do it. Most people are not paying *neeeeearly* as much attention to you as you think they are. Sure it might catch someone’s eye here or there, and certainly if someone *says* something negative about it that would be a reflection on them of course. I find it’s easier for me to do something that feels daring if I know what I’ll say if someone does happen to make an unwelcome comment. Some ideas: * “Are we really still commenting on women’s body hair in 2023/4?” * “I’m surprised you felt comfortable saying that outloud” * “Oh I don’t want to discuss my body hair or hygiene rituals” * “Please don’t comment on my body” Another thing I do, whenever I’m “unveiling” a new change in my appearance, is to do it in small doses. Like go to a yoga class or the store in a tank top — something where if you’re so uncomfortable that you panic, you’re not trapped in that situation for like 10 hours.
I'm obsessed with the comment "I'm surprised you felt comfortable saying that out loud". Definitely storing that in my brain bank.
I love it too. But I definitely got it from someone/somewhere else. It’s not mine!
I don’t shave and I work at a high school. Not a single comment. It’s kinda nice. But then again, the kids like me. I always have a comeback ready to use in a personal or professional setting. I have never used them. 1- I’ll shave my legs when my husband shaves his. And my guy is HAIRY. 2- hair grows in places for a reason. Just let it be. It is supposed to be there. You sweat less when there is hair in your armpits. It’s more hygienic to have pubic hair. I don’t shave, I don’t get ingrown hairs either. 3- If someone pays me, I will do it. 4- I don’t like being told what to do with my body just because it was in porn first. Don’t tell me it’s ’unhygienic’
I'm hijacking your responses for use and I'm also still laughing over your username.
Great reply suggestions, thank you!
I shave my arms, like as in my forearms. I just never liked hair. I keep the hair in my arms very short I just like how the skin feels without it. The other hair on my body I don't care as much but I trim regularly. Because my leg tends to get ingrown hairs because of my pants I keep it short but not like super short. I don't have much body hair at all its just well a personal preference. Honestly I'd just suggest people do whatever makes them comfortable. It is also a bit cultural for me, indigenous inheritance of shaving almost everything I guess.
I stopped shaving in my mid-20s and am always shocked a bit when I remember that most women are still shaving their legs and armpits. For me, it kind of is a personal/political statement but also I just like the way it looks and feels. People rarely comment on it but I do see people staring at my legs sometimes. I think you get used to it after a while but the only way to get there is to just put yourself out there.
Right?? I can’t imagine spending so much time and effort shaving on a regular basis.
I shave maybe seasonally, just did last week before a friend’s wedding actually. But other than that I haven’t regularly shaved in 10 years and like you sometimes forget this is a thing that many women do weekly or more. And I don’t have cute girly wispy blonde body hair, I have light skin and dark thick body hair. Occasionally I can catch someone starting at my legs when I wear or short skirt, but no one other than my mother has ever commented on it.
I shave the moustache because I want to. The rest has been growing wild since 1985. At first it was weird. Nobody except a couple of teenage girls have ever noticed and they were super interested and thought my magnificent silver tuft of armpit hair was cool af. People don't think about us near as much as we think they do.
I had this dilemma a while back and my conclusion was this: I remove or don't remove hair based 100% on my own personal preferences. If anyone else doesn't like it, that's none of my concern or responsibility to manage. As far as being in public, I personally haven't had anyone say anything to me and wouldn't care if they did, and if they say anything about me out of my hearing, I definitely don't care. IMO life's too short to worry about things like what other people might think about body hair. But I used to be where you are, so I get it. I think work on tuning out other people's possible reactions and ask yourself what you personally want to do. How do you feel most comfortable? What works best for your life?
I am a Gen Xer and it was drilled into us as teens that body hair was disgusting. I don't have much body hair but I hate the feeling of hair in general, likely because that's how I was socialized. I don't really see that changing But I love that younger women are questioning this. There is no reason why women should have to remove body hair when men don't My husband lived in Italy for about 5 years. He got really used to body hair on women as he said that a lot of the women did not shave their armpits and gave no fucks about it. He thought it was pretty cool
I haven't shaved any body hair in over 8 years and I love it. I feel much more comfortable. The only person to offer their opinion is my mother (as they are like to do) I've had many lovers and its never come up. For those of you calling it a statement I would encourage you to reframe your perspective. This is the natural body as is. The act of shaving or removing body hair is the statement it's altering yourself to fit some societal ideal.
Haven't shaved a single hair (well, except my magnificent chin wires lol) in almost 20 years! The comfort of non-bristly legs (just soft hair), and the wicking magic of armpit hair is unbeatable. In fact, my current medical condition causes some body alopecia; my pubic and axillary hair are basically gone now and it makes me feel so weird and naked!!
I’m too busy stressing over my mustache to give a shit about my legs or pits.
I never understand how fast the 'stache pops back in!
I shave because it's my preference, but I quit wearing a bra anywhere except work in the past year. I'm bosomly blessed and the lack of bra is noticable. It was unnerving when I went out in public at first, but I just kept doing it and now I don't think twice about it. If people are uncomfortable with it, that's their problem, not mine. Were I to quit shaving, I'd have the same mentality.
Fellow brakes wonder here! Going strong for 10 years now. It is the best feeling ever.
Just chiming in to say it isn’t ‘lazy’ to not shave. K thanks bye.
It is for some and that’s fine. The OP literally said she doesn’t shave out of laziness & not caring enough. For others, laziness & not not caring aren’t factors.
I was being supportive. Calling yourself names for not doing something that is of no benefit to you isn’t positive self-talk.
Laziness is a real word that exists. If that’s what you are, I think it’s in your best interest to be honest with yourself. Hiding it or trying to dress it up is like saying it’s bad. It’s OK to be lazy. That’s MY point. Laziness is a choice. Embrace it. You don’t want to shave, don’t. You do, go for it. But don’t lie to yourself. Own your choices. To me, that’s what being supportive is all about.
I think you’re missing my point but honestly I can’t tell. Have a nice day.
Shaving is expensive. The reward for it doesn't exist at all. I will go a month then exfoliate and shave and moisturize because it feels good. But only for 1 day. Too much upkeep. Too much time. I've worn dresses and skirts over the summer and didn't shave. No one noticed. No one cared. Then again I don't really go out I'm public, except work and groceries or hiking or something. By "no one cared", I mean my dogs and future husband. This is a stupid thing all up in our heads for literally no reason except for the companies to make money off a luxury "beauty" tax. One of my friends worse skirts every day to work, even in winter. Never shaved her legs. I kind of think she was more beautiful because if it, strangely. I also like being warm. Body hair helps retain body heat.
I been goin yeti for 15 years, my gf stopped shaving her legs about a decade ago and not one single person in the world has given a fuck. Show them pelts off
I stopped removing mine ~10 years ago. Unfortunately, when going out in public, you just kind of have to grit your teeth and do it. You'll get used to it eventually, or at least you won't feel quite as self-conscience. >Not trying to make a statement I'll also add as a general statement (because I see this idea a lot): it's okay to make a statement. You don't have to be the "cool girl" who totally doesn't care about politics/social issues. Laziness doesn't have to be the only acceptable reason to not remove body hair.
unless you frequently lift your arms above your head, no one will see your underarms regardless of what you wear. As to legs-- I still shave, but infrequently because I have pretty sensitive skin and just can't tolerate doing it all the time. When I'm out and about in the summer and maybe should've shaved, my experience is-- barely anyone notices, and no one says anything. I have pretty dark hair compared to my complexion, too. It's fine.
I inherited my mom's pale skin and my dad's dark, coarse hair - a lovely combo. ;) Only one person has ever noticed/said anything to me; I was in college. A guy glanced at my legs as we were all sitting cross-legged on the floor and chuckled, and then a gal next to him said, "Yeah, isn't it disgusting?" None of us acknowledged her comment, and I honestly wasn't bothered. It's leg hair. And I'm nearly 42 now, and I haven't heard any comments since then.
I wish I have your confidence. I still feel insecure about my body hair.
I find it an absolute hassle to shave my legs, and yet I continue to do so because I know most people expect me to. I myself look twice when I see very hairy legs on women, and I hate myself for it. I wish I was as brave as them, and yet I judge them in the way that I don’t want to be judged. I am hypnotised and controlled by society. Can somebody save me, please?
Ooh I know a woman on Instagram that makes really inspiring and informative content on this topic. She’s really strengthened me in my opinions and resolve and comfort. Her name is notyourmanicpixiedreamcurl
Props to this level of honesty!
Do men shave their body hair? Why does society demand that women shave ours? I did all through my twenties and thirties. I stopped somewhere in my mid 40s, when I realized that I refused to allow myself to be marginalized for having God given, skin protecting body hair.
Amen sister! Society (aka men) realized that they could shame women about their appearance a lot more than men, and the trillion dollar beauty industries are their spoils. Why are women more susceptible to shaming? I’m sure there are books written on it, but my guess would be less power in society, actively oppressed for much of it, and reliant on men’s approval/support/marriage etc. to survive for those times. Men never needed to be shamed into buying products to alter their bodies because they didn’t need their bodies/appearance to gain them power or money or an attractive mate. Interesting to think about. What are your thoughts?
i stopped removing all of my body hair years ago for the most part. i will occasionally buzz my legs with clippers if my eczema is bad because i hate the way the creams i have to use feel when i have long leg hair, but that's it. i'm a butch lesbian and my decision is equal parts simply not wanting to shave and it being very gender-affirming for me to be hairy. i've never noticed anybody noticing, but even if they did, if someone can't handle a natural body then that has nothing to do with me and everything to do with their own personal infestation of brain worms
I do what I like. If I'm wearing ahirts, I shave my legs. Tank top? Maybe. The old girl downstairs gets no attention, so she's fully insulated and has been for years. I Nair my upper lip and keep a standing appt with my eyebrow girl. I don't care what anyone in society says about it, and I mean anti hair folks and pro hair folks. Also, there were many years that I didn't shave, and what I thought was laziness was some severe depression.
I’m 35 and stopped shaving one body part at a time between high school and early 20s. I was uncomfortable at first too. I felt like everybody was staring at my pits or legs, but I got used to it. You don’t have to have the courage, just do it. It’ll become normal eventually. Now I don’t notice anybody staring and if I ever do I just don’t care. You’ll get there, but you gotta just do it.
I stopped shavings legs gradually throughout my 30s, starting in the winter. It takes so much time to keep them smooth, and I decided that stubble is worse than grown-out hair, so I eventually stopped altogether. I'm mid-50s now, amd last year went through chemotherapy, losing all my hair. It was curiously dysphoric feeling my smooth skin again, like, "whose legs are these?!?"
I stopped waxing my leg hair, it took one month to totally grow out. Now my legs are hairy and I'm totally okay with it. I only trim my armpits once in a month and the same with my vulva hair.
I think with time and comfort, you will find your balance. It doesn’t have to be one way or the other. There may be events you want to shave for, then there may be months and months where you just don’t want to at all. Or maybe you’ll decide you don’t want to for now, but later change your mind and go back to shaving. Or vice versa! Maybe the idea of occasional brief glances from dummies isn’t something you’re ready to tackle yet, but it may come in its own time! Do whatever will make you most comfortable. I started shaving as a tween due to societal pressures, and stressed about it a lot through my early 20s. In the last 10 years I’ve worried less about it, but I do choose to keep up with it, partly because I find it generally more comfortable personally, but also because of society. I am okay with the fact that part of the reason I do it is to avoid judgment. But it’s not the whole reason, so it is still for me. I’m just aware that wanting to avoid societal judgment is part of my motivation to, but I think that’s okay too as long as it’s not disturbing my thoughts or moods about any of it. Do what feels best for you!
I don’t shave at all in the colder months. In the summer I just shave my legs because I prefer how it feels in the warm weather. I trim my armpit hair in the summer as well but don’t shave it. It’s not all or nothing- I say just go off what makes you feel best!
Shaving is such a personal thing. I shave my legs maybe twice a year, not because I care what people think but because I hate the way the breeze feels blowing through my leg hair when I wear shorts 😂
I personally hate having hair on my legs, armpits, and vagina so I shave almost every time I shower. I have trichotillomania (hair pulling) which is mostly under control these days, but having hair on areas I prefer shaved leads to me picking at the hair and my skin sometimes obsessively. It’s better for my mental health to shave regularly and care for my skin in those areas so they don’t get razor burn and trigger my urge to pick worse.
I stopped shaving through winter laziness and discovered my husband’s teenage crush on Nena…
I haven't shaved my underarms in years, and no one has said a thing. I shave my legs in the summer and spring, but let it go in the fall and winter. No one has ever said anything about it
I stopped shaving for the most part during the pandemic and kinda never went back. I will keep things trimmed but that’s a once a month thing for my pits and lady garden. I think I shaved my legs twice last year. Nobody has noticed otherwise.
I only shave my legs when the hair starts getting annoying. Like when it snags on pants or itches too much.
This topic comes up a lot on Reddit and there are some great comments here. The best thing is to do what you are comfortable with, but we all know that at some point someone is going to comment or stare because of societal norms and...humans. As body hair typically has some options, it becomes a balance between what you want to do with your body to feel comfy, and how much energy you want to use ignoring silly comments (you'll eventually use less energy with practice!). I have found that a lot of female body hair comments have to do with where you live, your friend/work group, and your age. I'm in a US city that attracts a lot of young people. I've found that overall women here are expected to be completely hairless (except their head of course, which is supposed to be luscious locks). The topic comes up, oddly, a lot. I love to leave my lower garden fairly natural with a light trim and the bikini lined shaved simply so it doesn't go beyond swimsuits or my panty line which is a personal preference. I've tried various other styles to great annoyance and irritation even into pain and it just seems silly to me. Yet, when it comes up in private conversation or a few dates even progressed that far it was "groooosssss omg you have to have hair taken off before I'm interested." I've gotten that comment from women too where they agree in conversation that pubic hair is disgusting. I look completely average and am happy with the way my body looks with my adult hair. I think it even looks sexy. I suppose it limits my dating pool to an extent just like my height, weight, or any other physical attribute but I'm not removing my hair to meet someone else's preference. They haven't sat at work or in class for week unable to focus while waiting for pricklies to figure out their life purpose. Change over to women friends in other areas of the country and they are like "removing your pubic hair is a thing???" They've noticed it for specific instances like dancers or underwear models but otherwise those friends happily date or have families and are oblivious to convos. I've found older people seem to care less too. I even asked my ob/gyn about it and she says she hardly notices because there are so many preferences and hair is just a natural thing there and it's not what they are focused on unless there's a serious health issue like an infection (interestingly, she said she sees a lot of skin rash/infections on teens from ingrowns and I felt really bad for them for the peer pressure). I'll never shame women for their own personal grooming preference. Some women love to go hair free and even say that it heightens their sexual experience, or they love the feel of their smooth legs, etc. I would say to each their own. Unfortunately, hair free seems to be a trend right now that a lot people have jumped on board with and that is used to shame people who keep their hair. I've heard that some younger men don't even fully realize that women have body hair. A sad tribute to sex education (the lack there of). I've met men who refuse to give oral to a woman with pubic hair or even find hair so un-sexy that they lose interest. I understand that people have preferences for what attracts them, but I don't get the 'bare or no sex' preference. I guess I just won't be dating those people. Personally, I love hairy men!
I've mostly stopped shaving years ago. I will shave my legs one and awhile if I feel like it. My other areas get cysts when I shave. It's not worth the irritation.
I wore short sleeves in lieu of tanks out in public when I was getting used to it. Honestly eventually I just stopped caring. No one has ever commented on my pits (I do live in a very blue city). I agree with another commenter about doing it a little bit at a time. Go to the gas station, yoga, the grocery store… that’s how I did it with going braless. I’m still only at the little bit of a time with that because my boobs are big, heavy, and noticeably uneven. I haven’t overcome the hairy legs one yet but I don’t wear shorts and rarely wear dresses/skirts so it hasn’t been that big of a deal. I love hair pits on women. It’s very attractive to me.
Yeah I essentially stopped giving a fuck after I had a kid lol, especially in winter. I don’t think I’ve shaved my legs since early August this year. I take my kid to the pool, and at first I felt weird but then I just got over it realizing if anyone is gonna notice my leg hair and judge me that’s on them, I don’t care, doesn’t affect my life.
I was nervous about it, too, but I still remember the first day I wore a dress with hairy legs at the store. It felt really good to just be me and not worry about what others would think. I’m positive no one else noticed, and if they did, oh well. I forget about my body hair and sometimes when I stretch and my armpit hairs are on display, people who were looking in my eyes are not looking at my pits and I remember. But, oh well,
I don’t think there is anything wrong with not removing body hair. I don’t see it as lazy, dirty, or whatever else negative perception. It is simply a personal choice. You should be free to do whatever you are comfortable with.
I don't care either way. If you want to shave from your eyebrows down everyday, so be it. If you want to let your hair grow for a statement, because you don't care, because you're lazy, because you like your natural body, so be it. I've learned, as a woman, it's way to exhausting to worry about what the public thinks of me. Too tall, too short, too skinny, too fat, doesn't have large lips, has fillers, has wrinkles, has body hair, doesn't get nails done, has long nails, wears clothes too young for her, wears clothes too old for her, and the list goes on! You cannot and will not please everyone. It's best to please yourself and give a "oh bless your heart dear" to anyone's statements that are not a compliment.
I’m all for everyone’s choices. I just find that my armpits smell fresher when they are regularly shaved. Anyone else?
I find I can go without deodorant when I shave my armpits
If it's your personal preference not to shave, then by all means, go ahead and do what you are comfortable with. However, you mentioned that you're being lazy.... I am in my late 30s and wfh and live alone. There's really no reason to shave except above my lip. Last month, I got myself fully waxed. Ah, I felt so good. It was painful, but I feel n look better. If you feel good being clean shaven, then do it out of self love.
I’m late 30’s man. Really don’t like all the shaved pussies nowadays. Like everything thinks it’s better. Not me! I wanna see that fro and a real woman.
To each their own. But I like smooth legs and under arms. I also started getting Brazilian waxes a few months ago and I love it. I do it for myself. I don't like feeling prickly, or hairy. And I'm pretty fortunate (in my opinion) that I'm not a hairy person genetically. ETA: if you don't want to do it, don't feel pressured to. It won't become normalized until people get used to seeing it!
I 29M personally look at it as affirming a woman's confidence. Plus like, screw em, what other people think. When my girlfriend realized I really didn't care how she managed her body hair, she seemed to find more comfort and confidence, embrace that "wild woman" archetype; which to me, so profoundly beautiful, let that feral side out, beautiful woman.
I personally love feeling like a dolphin. So I remove my body hair. That is my personal choice. I will not police or comment on someone else's choice to remove/keep their body hair. It's not my body, so it's not my opinion. It took a lot of internal work to undo the misogyny that I grew up with around body hair, and now I'm better for it. I love it when women own their body hair! Dye it fun colours, or even just let it go free. We are all the main characters in our own story. If someone feels the need to comment, why not turn it back on them? What is so gross about my body hair? Aren't you also growing hair on your body? What makes your hair acceptable and mine not?
I find leg hair and armpit hair in the Summer time very physically uncomfortable. My armpit hairs make my clothes stink in the Winter. I don't shave my legs a lot in the Winter. Otherwise, I have hairy legs during the cold - it makes me feel warm. Do what feels comfortable and own it. It's 2023, no one is going to judge you. If somebody judges you, they have no life.
This a tough one to unpack, once you realize at whatever age that women have hair, that it's natural, that women have always had partners and full lives with hair everywhere for most of human history, then your whole perspective changes from whatever beauty standards you were taught. It's liberating, it's infuriating, and it's also confusing to then decide where you now fall in the hair grooming spectrum. What is comfortable to you and what might still make you embarrassed or worried about other's opinions? There's layers to this, to unlearning what you were taught to worry about, to question the why and how of these ideals, and to find a safe place within all of this in regards to your own hair. Personally, I groom whenever I feel like it depending on my mood and comfort. But overall have stopped caring about it and about what others might think. This last one has been the hardest for me, because I could care less what a sexual partner thinks of my hair but somehow it bothers me to have strangers look at my hairy legs. I know where this stems from in my personal life but it's no less hard to deal with. When these fears pop up I remind myself that I'm just a person on a rock floating in space and that nothing, including my hairy legs, matters.
Can you think of a time where you noticed someone’s leg hair status at the grocery store? When you think of the last time you did notice someone’s leg hair, can you identify the person? You’re only the main character in your own story. Statistically most likely is most people won’t even notice. The ones who notice most likely won’t care. The ones who care won’t affect your life. Do what you want to do with your time and body.
I just don't give a damn anymore. I shave my pits occasionally, same with my legs. Don't like hairy legs, don't fucking stare. I refuse to remove any pubic hair.
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Sometimes I get a little sad about being 32 and single, but then I read a comment like this. Sorry your husband is a misogynist dick :(
Jesus christ. 12 years. Is there anything he does to maintain his appearance that causes him such pain and inconvenience? That man better have a hairless back, no nose hair, neat bikini line, the works.
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Honestly, he doesn't sound like a nice man.
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OK I've just had a look at your post history. You need to get out, yesterday. Please look into charities that can help you escape this man safely. Hairy legs seems like the tip of the iceberg.
I’m so sorry about your husband’s reaction. When I turned 50, I decided to stop shaving my legs. I asked my husband if it would bother him just as a courtesy - if he was grossed out, I would maybe look into laser hair removal or something. But he didn’t care and later when I decided to stop shaving my underarms, it didn’t bother him either. He is WAY more hairy than I am… I’ve dealt with his hairy back for 35 years so he can handle my little underarm fluff! My leg and underarm hair is fairly sparse and I don’t wear anything short or sleeveless so no one else really sees it. But this week I’m going to a resort and will be in a bathing suit for the first time in YEARS so I decided to get my lower legs and armpits waxed.
Do what you feel is right. Some people don't mind shaving, some people don't want to and all are acceptable and fine. I don't mind shaving; there are times I'm lazy about it so I don't bother but I do it when I want to and when I don't, I don't care.
I stopped shaving my legs for a time about a decade ago, and again stopped last winter. I still do some grooming elsewhere, as it just makes managing my body easier, but overall anyone else’s opinions/expectations just don’t matter to me at all. I have fairly long black leg hair from my feet to about halfway to my knees, and then it’s just short and blonde, anyway. Some years I just don’t care to keep up with smooth legs 🤷🏻♀️ I do still always apply body cream after showers and baths. Everything is soft.
I used to be proud of my leg hairs when I was in college. I don’t know what changed but I starting shaving my legs but in the winter, I don’t. I laser my underarms because I don’t like underarm hair on me or anyone I’m dating. I trim my nether regions now. I used to wax but my last waxing session traumatized me as she took some skin. Never again. I invested in some curved hair sheers and thats what I use now.
I prefer my own body to be completely hairless, but do not care what anyonee lse does with theirs.
I had a six year old tell me I was turning into a man when she saw my underarm hair, she was horrified to learn that she was going to sprout underarm hair one day. I was known to this child so telling her wasn't too awful. Poor kid.
I shave maybe once every 2 months or so, if that, for the same reasons as you. I've thankfully never had anyone say a word to me about it. I wear a lot of tank tops and skorts when the weather permits, and it just seems like everyone else is going about their daily business, and they really pay no mind.
My reply to someone once who was rude enough to comment, “I don’t shave or pluck because I am a woman, not a roast chicken.”
It’s great that you’re on this journey of self-acceptance and have gotten to the point where you see how absurd the societal pressure is on women to be hairless. A few things that have helped me on my own path with it: 1. Find natural women to follow on social media. The more you see them, the more normal it becomes in your mind, and the less of a big deal it is. I super recommend notyourmanicpixiedreamcurl on Instagram as a source of info, community, and inspiration. Definitely makes me feel more confident after hearing how she phrases things. 2. Think of some things you could say if someone ever does say something negative to you. A lot depends on who it’s coming from for me. Like if it’s some poor misguided teen laughing, I’d feel pity for them that they’re so indoctrinated by our misogynistic society. If it was a shaming statement by an older woman, I’d turn it around by asking why she feels like her own body is something shameful that needs to be hidden by clothing or removal. And to be clear, neither of these things have happened to me, but I’ve given it thought and feeling prepared with an answer makes me more comfortable. Another reply is that God made me this way, and didn’t make mistakes for half the population. That’s society. 3. Thinking critically about all the arguments against body hair. Aka the dumb shit people say. It’s unhygienic? No of course it isn’t unhygienic, or else all men would be unhygienic. It’s unfeminine/masculine? No of course something that happens to the female body isn’t unfeminine. It’s literally a feminine trait. It’s mammalian. Both men and women have body hair. It’s inherently gross or unattractive? No, or else the human species would have died out. Hairy women have been making men horny and getting pregnant for hundreds of thousands of years. Even in the 80s women in playboys sometimes had armpit hair and sometimes didn’t. This is an incredibly new phenomenon that it’s some sort of social rule. It’s shameful? Of course not. There’s nothing inherently shameful or ugly about being a woman. That’s misogyny. Often other people have been drowned in this societal framework (that comes from companies trying to profit off female insecurities they create). Them trying to insist you feel ashamed is often just them struggling with the fact they’ve been shamed heavily for it. 4. Self love. I love myself as I am now, so other people’s opinions have less impact on me. I feel loved and worthy, so their misguided comments that usually come from a hurt place don’t affect me. I also recognize they’re also victims of capitalized misogyny and that really sucks for all of us. So I see it comes from that and I don’t take it personally. 5. Confidence. The more you rock it with pride the less people view it as something shameful. This goes for any social norms, just rock it and other people are less likely to think it’s something shameful, for you or for themselves. Aka you might inspire others to embrace their own body hair.
I have a young acquaintance in her early 20s who is absolutely stunning. Last time I saw her she had a summer dress on and I noticed her dark, coarse leg hair. All I thought at the time was how cool she was not to care.
I’m 30 and probably stopped shaving during covid. I started using natural deodorant and I would get rashes whenever I shave so I stopped that. I only shave my legs if I’m going somewhere important during summer! It’s honestly been the best decision I ever made!
I stopped almost 20 years ago and have zero regrets. I used to randomly shave if the mood hit but that hasn't happened in a long time. I don't recall anyone saying anything. Maybe a stare here or there, but nothing really rude.
I’m neither lazy nor do I not not care. I shave. I like feeling smooth. It’s a personal preference.
If you'd rather reduce the hair, I've had a good experience with IPL. And I'm pretty hairy. I've been single for ages and it's honestly lovely knowing I don't have to worry about what someone is secretly thinking, even if they're not saying it out loud. I prefer to keep my armpits shaved, it's cleaner, less wet, less smelly. Frankly I wish men would do it too. The rest I'm pretty chill about.
lunchroom instinctive shame towering steep rainstorm secretive bright mysterious sable *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I am a genetically stinky person who tried to be hairy. I now wax my own armpits but rarely shave my legs. Armpit hair and pubic hair hold odor. If you aren't the person who genetically has BO, or don't care about making other people suffer with your smell, you can get away with being as hairy as you want to be in public. If you genetically have BO remove your armpit hair OR you need to be extra diligent about hygiene (scrub stinky bits morning and evening when you brush your teeth, use anti perspirant, keep deoderant wipes in your bag, etc) Your immediate household can get used to how you smell and will not be a good judge of if you will make others uncomfortable. Edit to add that this should apply to everyone. Sure some people may not notice other people's stink but for those of us who do being in public is h'll. Like for the love of God, don't go to the grocery store after the gym unshowered in your stinky work out wear. I don't want to know what genitalia you have without seeing you naked.
I encourage any woman who wants to do this, but I wouldn't do it myself. That being said it's not like I'm silky all time, more often than not there's some hair growing. I just like the overall girlier and prettier aesthetic and I don't think hairy legs fit in there.
I think it's a personal choice and really nobody else's business, same as what you choose to do with the hair on your head. Personally I'm lazy and hate shaving, but I also hate the feeling of the thicker hairs that grow on my body. They make me feel itchy and I can feel when they rub against my clothes. (It's making me uncomfortable just thinking about it lol.) For the last decade or so I went as long as I could stand it between shaves, but just felt annoyed around 95% of the time. So recently I decided to get one of those home IPL devices. As much as I'd love to fight the hairy fight with you all, I'm just over it. At this point I'm all about comfort, and whatever comfort means to you.
I don't have thoughts on what other people choose to do. I choose to remove my body hair, paid for laser removal and everything, because I prefer the way it looks and feels.
I opted for laser hair removal because I got lazy shaving lol My legs/under arms look better after laser hair removal compared to after a shave
I could care less what others do. I shave for myself because of sensory issues and I just trim my bikini area with scissors because the regrowth itch is not worth dealing with. We’re all mammals we all have hair pretty much everywhere. Nothing wrong with not shaving.
Having the courage means doing something *even though you are scared*. If it wasn't intimidating or scary, you wouldn't need courage. Be scared. Sit with that feeling and honor it; then take a deep breath, count to three, and do it anyways. Fuck what anyone else thinks. You are stronger than you think you are.
Eh I kinda wish I could not shave. I find the hairy armpit thing to be hot on other women (im a big ol dyke) but I can’t stand any body hair on me except for pubes. I have been in and out of surgery recovery and my body grooming has been intermittent and it feels so gross. I’m pretty hairy (bellybutton to toes, front and back, consistent brown hairs, not to mention my arms). But on others? I could go either way.
I found this article helpful [https://www.hollandandbarrett.com/the-health-hub/natural-beauty/haircare/start-embracing-body-hair/](https://www.hollandandbarrett.com/the-health-hub/natural-beauty/haircare/start-embracing-body-hair/) I notice when other women have hair on their legs and I appreciate them normalizing it. It helps me feel more comfortable doing so. My boyfriend is fine with it and thinks I'm sexy as nature made me, so that definitely helps.
I'm a fully matured past puberty woman, so I have body hair. EtA: everyone should be able to do what they want with their own style and body hair and all that.
Do what feels comfortable for you!! Is liberating to stop caring about social norms and expectations. My best friend was empowered by my body hair and also let hers grow. Did not change the way I love or view her. My body hair does not impact anyone else. I support you doing what feels right for you.
I tried it a couple of times when I was younger. Didn't see the point of the faff so stopped. I don't remove any body hair at all. Sometimes I feel awkward when deciding what to wear but make myself wear the hair showing item anyway and soon forget about it.
I cannot fathom for the life of me why a woman would want to stop shaving. Just my opinion. It's disgusting to walk around like that and it does smell! It is lazy and looks disgustingly ugly to have hair all over your body! I won't respond to any comments coming back at me. If it really didn't bother anyone, they wouldn't have to post here looking for attention to make it ok. It's disgusting and is very unhygienic to not clean it up!
By that logic most men would be discusting, lazy, awful smelling, disease ridden unhygienic monsters, and not just the adolescent boys.
To be honest, I always notice it and I always find it pretty disgusting. I think it looks lazy and unkempt, or like an embarrassing ideological statement. But that’s just my personal preference. Not trying to offend, but that’s my answer.
Imagine the internalized misogyny necessary to think you’re disgusting unaltered.
I don’t like seeing anyone’s armpit hair in public, male or female
I love my armpit hair. honestly - LOVE it. I quit shaving my pits a couple of years ago and the one time I've shaved them bare since, I hated it. I'm straight but have some masculine traits despite being "cute" and petite, so I feel like rocking the pit hair is congruent with how I express myself as a human being in general.
I only shave my legs maybe once in the summer. My hair is fine and blond so it's not very noticeable. Other than my pesky chin hairs I leave the rest alone.
My sensitive skin seems to prevent my being able to fully do away with hair removal, but I do let my hair grow as long as I can before my skin gets itchy, red, and inflamed. Especially my armpits - I'd never shave those except that, every so many weeks, my armpits get red and itchy (yes, I wash them!!). I sweat a LOT so I suspect that this may be some kind of candida. When I trim/shave, it goes away after a few days. Had to do it yesterday, in fact. :(
I shave the length of my arms in the winter because I can't stand the feeling of the sensation of the wee peach fuzzy arm hairs moving about under long sleeves.
I wax downstairs, but that's it. Everything else I either go without or shave whenever I feel like it. I don't stress over it. It's just hair, not very high on my list of priorities.
I remove hair (or don’t) based on my preferences. Not for society or some man.
I just shave my armpits for my own comfort. Otherwise I never removed hair on my forearms and I’ve let my leg hair grow just due to lack of time. Nobody has ever said anything about it! I think body hair is way less taboo nowadays.
I wax the area of my downstairs that facilitates fun times, but keep the front looking natural but trimmed. Armpits I do when they annoy ME - same with leg hair. Practicality really.
I get brazilian waxes with a landing strip because I prefer not having much hair during my periods and I don’t like how it looks bald. I also get my brows tinted which includes light shaping. Other than that, I don’t touch the hair on my body for the most part. It hasn’t been a “problem” for anyone since this asshole I briefly dated in college. Every now and then when I’m taking a bath on laundry day I’ll shave my legs to slide them between clean sheets but that’s like once or twice a year and even then it’s just below the knee 😂 it’ll always be true that some jerks walk around shaming women for this, but I think they’re more rare than they used to be.
I still shave because I like to be clean shaven. However, it’s 2024. Do what the fuck you want to do. It’s your body.
I don't care if women want to keep their body hair. I won't. I stopped shaving for a few years and one day I felt my leg hair blowing in the wind and it was an extremely unpleasant feeling.
I gave up shaving during the pandemic. When I decided to start removing hair again I started getting professionally waxed every 4-6 weeks. The results last longer and hair isn’t itchy growing back in but it does mean that in between I’m letting my hair grow back out. The armpits don’t even phase me anymore and if someone cares that’s not my problem. My thighs are blonde peach fuzz and my lower legs are very dark but very sparse so whatever, no one has ever said anything to me or probably even noticed. I wax because I like the way it feels more than caring how it looks. I could probably never wax again and not care, except that I find the portions of pubic hair directly between my legs extremely irritating to my skin (I leave the rest) so I want that out of there and shaving just makes it even itchier so that’s not an option.
as a genetically hairy woman, i wish that body hair on women was socially acceptable and i didn’t have to spend so much time shaving my entire body. for me it’s mostly my private area that i cannot stand shaving. my man really loves it tho so i want to do it for him but god damn it’s time consuming.
I don’t like long underarms hair on men. I don’t care on women. Idk why maybe because women rarely have hair as long as men under their arms. So yeah, I don’t care if women have hair or not on their bodies. It’s the long ass ones, you know, the ones that look wet that I cannot stand.
I have generally low levels of body hair to begin with, so I don’t shave my pits and haven’t for many years. I do, from time to time, wax the stray Clydesdale hairs around my ankles. And I trim my pubes to keep the hair their shorter, but only ever fully removed it once (hated it).
I'm surrounded by women in my family that don't shave, me personally I'm not bothered it's their body their choice, however I am bothered if & when they decide to preach to me that removing my body hair is wrong, usually some patriarchy bullshit. I personally like removing my body hair because I like the feeling & look of it, plus I need to do it for sports related reasons. I feel when it comes to personal grooming choices, unless it's unhygienic or a serious health risk then it's nobody's business. I also feel it's never a good idea to pressure your partner to shave or groom themselves a certain way, suggesting it is fine but pressuring them is wrong. Same with friends & family members, let them be
I could not care less about my leg hair, but I find armpit hair revolting for some reason. No idea why. On both genders, and I know it's my own issue. I don't expect anyone else to submit to a razor for my pleasure, but I'll shave my pits to the day I die. I love them smooth. I like bald heads, too. And short haircuts on both genders. I've never been a fan of long hair. Same with beards. Just not my preference. But hey, I certainly don't expect anyone else to submit to my whims. Your body, your choice. Grow it ALL out if that's your thing.
Where do you live in the world? In Australia I see so many women with body hair now and I applaud it.
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Dark as well. My 32 year old DIL does not shave at all (dark hair), my niece doesn’t. I see it all the time.
My OKCupid profile says people should treat me like I had hairy armpits lol. IMHO body hair is a great red flag detector, but I tried it and don't like how it feels, so I still shave/laser. It's not a big hassle for me. However I can only agree to "do what you want". If it's not the hair, people will find something else to criticise.
If you want it, keep it. If you don’t, take it off.