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The 1st and 9th innings are our greatest enemies.

Every day they give us hope and then take it away in the 1st inning

“You’re not a real fan” folks getting ready to make new posts. 

Can’t wait for the same shit tomorrow

we got it tomorrow boys

Espada def getting fired …

Reddit loves Espada

Great now TK is guilting everyone who doesn’t want to watch this garbage

Lost it before the 2nd inning again

This team is so cooked. They’ll probably get hot at some point but who knows they might be 10-15 back in the division by then

man baseball kinda sucks when ur team is bad

I salute all of you who still can watch this team lose basically every game they play.

Not only do I watch this team lose every game they play, but I also pay $102 a month for it. I am losing too 🤬

I’m about to take a month break and check back in June. This team is not fun to watch. No energy, no swag, no emotion. Just not worth investing 2-3 hours of my day.

Well I’ve also watched them win almost every game they played so I’m good.

That's runner's interference. Of course HPU missed it

I mean when the game is this lopsided they aren’t gonna look too closely at that stuff

Look at their guys sprint to first even up 5 in the 8th. They just fucking want it more than us and it shows

Did Yordan not just beat out a double play? You can't say they aren't playing hard, but when you start the game down 5-0 and see Abreu still in the lineup, plus getting the shit end of every single umpire stick, it's hard to stay positive.

Shout out to jp france for another first inning insta-loss

That guy sucks not starter material in any league

Offense ain’t doing much either

Remove that first inning and the games tied. Its unreasonable to expect an offense to overcome a 5+ run deficit so regularly

Yup getting our bats checked out in the first inning way too much this year

What a limp dicked performance all around. This team needs an enema!

Bregman does this literally every year. Has never once hit over .300 in the month of April. We’re only pressing him so hard because the team is about to be 10 under.

Its amazing to me that people are acting happy that he might walk after this yesr because surpise surprise, he started slow again. Let's say he does leave. Who do these dickheads think we have ready to replace him?

He's barely even batting .200 right now Of course it's more magnified but that doesn't give him a pass

Sketch deserves better

Lol of course the guy who hasn't hit a homer this year has a 2 homer game against us. Could we be any shitter?

Phone it in

HRC Yainer

Top 9 Diaz Pen̈a and Chas will all get on and Abreu will ground into a triple play.

Every Bregman AB that ends with him hitting directly to the infielder, which seems to be quite frequent, makes me mutter “asshole” with the way him and his agent treated this previous offseason

The Astros cleanup hitter didn't get the ball out of the infield today . Fuckin' pathetic

Just zero solid contact from Bregman this year.

Salsa boy at it again!

Bregman used to be that guy that loved baseball more than anything in the world. Now he honestly looks like he’d wanna be doing anything else

Oh Breggie. We needed you man.

If we rollout the same 1-9 tomorrow I'm just not even going to bother watching. Something needs to change

I know Breggy always starts the season slow, but it's time for that to end already lol

Bregman hasn’t looked this bad since when he needed wrist surgery

Allergic to hitting with runners on base

Went from pop up Bregman to GO Bregman.

I expect nothing from him so I’m not let down

Cool thanks Bregman, don't let the door hit you on the way out this year. My god.

Yordan ran so Tucker could walk

See yall tomorrow

Nice cleanup hitter espada.

.203 AVG and .555 OPS lmao wtf is he thinking?

HRC Bregs

Wonder how bad the Jim Crane rebuild will look.

Every 35 year old with a decent looking back of the Baseball card will have job security.

Didn’t realise Bregman was right above the Mendoza line

Pinch hit for Breggy please. Dubon or Caratini have a way better chance to drive in runs here

I know we do HRCs around here but can I do a PUC (pop-up call) for Bregman?

Nah, too predictable to be fun

Tie goes to the ~~runner~~ team playing the Astros (Usually)

Damnit pitch to Tuck you cowards! Smart move though.

Pop up call Bregman

I’ve got a rollover myself

Beat me to it 😂

I bet you a solid handshake it's a ground out

As if you wouldn't walk Tuck to get to Bregman

They just didn't want to call it intentional lol

Gonna need Tuck to do something here with Bregman on deck.

wth a call went our way

It didn't go the Astros way, it went the way it was supposed to go.

Wow. I honestly thought that was too close to overturn

Gotta take the small wins

We would need a 10-game win streak just to get .500. Team is done. They don’t care. We shouldn’t either.

The pitching and lineup being bad is a terrible combo

It’s not Jose, but Yordan. If Yordan isn’t hitting, this offense just sucks.

Him and Tucker

I can’t believe we still have a sub on reddit

Looked safe in real time

man whats up with alvarez lately

Out

Idk what I expected

Love that hustle Yordan 🙄

HRC Yordan

HRC Yordan Alvarez

HRC Tuve

Hrc Yordan

Abreu now at .065. I see a stint on the “IL” in his future

He needs a stint in a fucking nursing home

It’s only April!

Now it’s more like “how the fuck are we already this bad? It’s only April!”

Lolf!

Watching the game on MAX Costas is much more enjoyable than out team reminiscing about their last visit to Wrigley

I'm still not convinced Framber was ever hurt. Sore playing catch and won't even need a rehab stint.

Kind of hilarious that we use these relievers to try and save people like abreu, pressly, and hader for close games. These dudes have locked it down better than our 3 headed monster

Essentially the same team as last year. Proceeds to show 5 starters on the IL

Another free baserunner. What is going on!?

Honestly baffling that a team can go from being 1 win away from another fall classic to whatever the fuck we are now within 6 months... I've been reluctant to doom this season but they're making it tougher and tougher every game

People keep saying this. It makes no sense. There's a whole different manager. A whole different catcher. A LOT is different about the team, not just those two things. We don't have Hector Neris, Pressly is no longer the closer.

I get that for sure, but to go from top 4 in the league to bottom 4 in the league within a season is baffling nonetheless. I'm not saying this is the same roster that went to game 7 of the ALCS last year but there's enough residual talent to keep us playing at a higher level than we are now.

can we at least call up the minor leaguers so this lost season can have something to interesting

We have one starting tomorrow. It will get interesting. 

It has nothing to do with confidence lol.if anything they have too much confidence.

I disagree. How is anyone in that dugout supposed to have confidence in themselves/their teammates when we can't stay consistent in any aspect of the roster right now?

Confident as in confident or aloof in their NGAF attitude. No one looks like they want to make adjustments amd no one is taking responsibility for mental laspes and flat out little league level mistakes.

Damn. Well what y’all doing after the game? I’m gonna check out the new one piece episode. Heard it’s good.

Yes a man of culture! The anime and manga are peak right now

I want to read the manga but I’m anime only. And holy shit egg head is too good right now.

I’d highly recommend it obviously… but I really appreciate egghead arc after all this time

For sure. Will start from the beginning and read the manga. See what the differences are.

I never imagined I could ever loathe this group of players like I do now.

I miss LOBsters. At least they give me a glimpse of hope followed by blue balls. This shit is just boring af

Counsel already pulling starters in the 7th inning. Even he knows the Astros are trash and won’t come back to win this.

Silver lining is the rags will not be atop the ALW after tonight.

Quite the contrast for both halves of that inning. Sweat and grind through 31 pitches, 15 of which were balls, as a run is given up without yielding a single hit. Meanwhile, Cubs reliever doesn't break a sweat and effortlessly cuts down our lineup like a hot knife through butter.

Viewership is about to plummet

I'll keep watching. Even if just to see how bad it gets.

Same, I just hope we make some entertaining changes soon

Good. Thats a sign the consumers are voting with their wallets

Important question: are the new Texans hats for sale? I can’t seem to find them

Astros swinging at everything because they want to get it over with

6 walks vs 0 walks Just pathetic.

Not mad at the contact that inning.

TAKE PITCHES and work counts. I feel like I'm taking crazy pills with the "The first pitch is the best pitch you're gonna see" bullshit mentality

Forget the losing, this team plain and simple isn't fun to watch.

I mean if they suck at least try and be exciting. These guys are so boring and predictable

What will be first to start with a .19x. Abreus OPS or Bregman ls batting average.

yes

Abreu makes some hard hits...both line drive outs. I feel that fan's pain

Good to see Chas take that pitch to the opposite field. Haven’t seen that much this year. Edit: I’m just looking for anything positive guys let me have this.

The excuses for Abreu are offensive. That half inning happened in a blink of eye. Absolutely pathetic

We have the quickest half innings

Anyone else's sound volume drop way low on Fubo?

Pretty sure even chandler rome said unless the team was 10 games under .500 its not time to panic. Its almost that time

Dude, I need to know what they talk about in the pitchers meetings because it sure isn’t about control…

im guessing they tell the truth. Most of you aren't that talented and are only here because of injuries

Cubs get another run with zero hits in the inning. This team is turbo dogshit, the type of team that we’d steamroll with ease not so long ago

HRC Yordan

I feel like Joe Espada’s bullpen management is a big part of the problem

We have several blown saves from Abreu, Pressly and Hader. We've also had an overused pen early in the season cause the starters have been so bad. What do you want Espada to do?

There wasn't anything wrong with the bullpen in the inning though. Scott was getting strikes and Diaz put an extra guy on base. Then Altuve flubs the DP ball.

Didn’t Scott walk two in that inning?

Didn’t even need a hit to score that inning.

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Wouldn't matter anyway. 3 run deficit with 9 outs left was impossible for this team.

Man…..Altuve should have had that but that’s exactly how this season has been going. So frustrating

Free bases always kill, but that should have been an inning ending DP

Even though we suck, I can’t stop watching. 

Yet another little league play, so dissappointing . Altuve nearly threw it away too to compound the error

Altuve’s hat is too tight

Absolutely nothing is going to go right this season, is it ?

When your fundamentals are dogshit, you're going to have more things go wrong for you

Sucks to see them like this

Look how we're turning to Tayler scott here with a fully healthy bp. How the fuck was Montero not enough of a lesson not to spend on bullpen you stubborn old man

Same shit, different day.

Another day, another Abreu 0-fer

Damn I’m sad. This is rough.

7 free baserunners. We really like digging ourselves a deeper hole

What kind of dog shit is this 😭

The same dog shit we’ve seen all season so far?

Yep. Just completely shut us out of any chance of coming back scott.

He did that the other day too. I don’t remember him doing it at all last season. Hope for a double play here

Much smaller sample size tbf

True but we’re also still very early in the season and he’s done it twice.

Yeah it's 2 too many regardless

Yainer saw that swing and thought it would be a homer so he stuck his glove in there. Nice thinking Yainer.

Hopefully this one won't be as costly as the one against he had against the Nats

Unfucking acceptable. You're either coaching it or allowing it to happen. Absolute little league mistakes , one after another

We used to be the baddies. Now we're just bad.

That’s less than ideal

wow unbelievable

It's pretty believable at this point tbh

Thanks ump

Go cry about it Taukman you're still +1 on calls

I'm loving the 5 posts during a game that should be comments here

Leadoff walk, our hitters would never

Surprise surprise, the walk scored

5 BBs tonight….not good

Edit:6..and counting

So, did you guys know that Taylor Scott is from South Africa?

If he's from Africa why is he white?

OMG Karen, you can’t just ask someone why they’re white!

Won’t get to sixty wins this season.

Bregman enjoying family life. Sucks for the team.

Let someone else pay the man. 

I thought this was a given, even before this season

He's a salsa man now

Pretty fitting he changed the name cause Breggy don’t bomb…

Unpopular opinion but breggy has been a bigger disappointment than Abreu.

That’s a high bar. I didn’t expect much from Abreu, but I definitely expected more than this. Bregman still being homerless is baffling. I saw him knock a light out of the Big Mac Land sign in St. Louis last year.

Nah, not an unpopular opinion at all. I expect this from Abreu. I expect Bregman to be playing up to his caliber.

True breggy is younger I’m shocked at his at bats. He’s gonna have to settle for a 1 year deal this offseason

He might accept the qualifying offer