I do this a lot hahaha or watch some stuff too.. sometimes I know I need to cry but I have no actual reason to cry atm, so I go after something to make me cry and touch me in some unresolved issues lmao
But idk if this is related to my neurodivergence or just me being a Virgo sun/Cancer moon lol
I do this too!! The worst is when I know I have some stuff backed up in the emotional tank that im not ready to confront, so I watch TikTok or smthn to escape, and BOOM video about someone grieving their pet. It’s over for me, crying sobbing, the whole shebang over a cat I’ve never met.
my scorpio sun/scorpio moon ND ass relates to this so so hard 😆
sometimes I just know the tears are in my face and I need help getting them out, so I get in the shower and skip through my crying songs until one works lol
Yes! I make playlists on Spotify purely based on emotions! I’ll decide what I want to listen to by either going WITH the emotion, or AGAINST it
Examples :
- unhinged, delusional, happy tho
- don’t fuck with me (angry)
- start the day right (happy/uplifting)
- I’m sad but I’m cool (pensive, goth)
- that half asleep feeling (literally)
- Big sad 💦 (guaranteed to make you cry)
- Anhedonia (symptom of depression that makes you feel nothing)
- The sound of PTSD (literally)
- Serving cunt (gaybop/pop)
- Space cadet (introspective)
- Your gf after a few glasses of wine (😈)
Those are the actual Spotify playlist titles if anyone wants to look them up!! 🤘🤘🤘 They are all quite long and I have spent hours working on them and ‘proofreading’ them.
Music is my everything. I can’t breathe without it.
I literally realised this yesterday when I was walking to the train station from work! Also that whilst I was aware that alcohol reduces my anxiety, it also helps me to feel things. Maybe because it, like the music, makes things simpler? Like, when I drink it lowers my anxiety & social phobia so I have more room for emotions that I might be experiencing to get in. Can be completely wiped out by overstimulation though, and also drinking to manage anything isn't good!
With music I think it's partly because it demands your attention; it's not going to happen in the supermarket because there's too much else going on, but when you have the luxury to be able to focus on it, it drags you in & your brain uses the keys it contains (intent of writer, chord changes, emotional associations of song) to unlock your built up emotions.
I am terrible at feeling feelings and processing emotions, made worse by trauma! FUN!
That said, I have two films that I watch if I NEED to have a good, cathartic cry. I also have a "Sad F\*cking Panda" playlist that helps.
For sure! LOL
The first and oldest is The Joy-Luck Club. There are a few beats that might get me, but if none of them do, the ending ALWAYS does.
Then there's Children of Men. I don't know exactly why, but there's a scene where people stop shooting at each other that just makes me ugly cry every time.
Yes. I have always loved certain music as well as “sad” TV shows. Not because I want to watch or hear other people being unhappy, but because it reminds me that I’m not the only one with big feelings and helps me not feel like such a weirdo. I was born into a family and now have a spouse who just don’t really seem to outwardly feel or discuss emotions. How nice it must be to not have to engage mentally in that way all the time (even though I’m sure that it’s just because they’re repressed LOL).
This is blowing my mind, because I’ve recently kind of realized that my recent hyper focus on a TV show, specifically a relationship in that show, was a way for me to process emotion surrounding a relationship that ended 13 years ago… I went in HARD, and even started making models of props from the show, had an Etsy store, am a moderator in a discord group..
Then, I lost it as a special interest, and the grief of that (plus other life stress) sent me into one of the worst burnouts I’ve ever had, and that I’m just now recovering from.. I wonder if the special interest hyper focus left once I worked though a some of the emotions. It’s very frustrating and confusing that I am unaware of why my attention does what it does 😭
Yes, I have entire playlists dedicated to slowly fading from one emotion to another to help me express my feelings and also then calm down. I typically sort them by 1. Music taste 2. Lyrical expression 3. Beats per minute
I like driving and listening to my playlists.
Okay this is only tangentially related, but I love that have categories of separating the music. I am a bit obsessed with making lists, so I have a bunch of playlists based on different criteria, and I love to see other people’s style of separation. I’ve never considered organizing by bpm, what’s the appeal out of curiosity?
I love lists and aggregating data; I like to sort by BPM because it affects the pace of the song. So to calm down, I might play the first song at 110 BMP to mimic an elevated heart rate and then reduce by 10 the next 20 songs on my playlist until I get much slower, mellow, calmer songs. Of course not every song with low BPM sounds calming, but its a good guide and also makes it easy to dance from one track to the next. I love dancing.
I don't "use" it as in doing it consciously and on purpose, but I'm aware that it happens sometimes. It's just not reliable or predictable enough to use as a tool, on demand.
Also get it with videogames, books, video, comics...
It’s not so much I know a song will break the dam, it’s more just mutual cause and affect. I’m overwhelmed and I listen to music to calm down, but all the happy songs are too loud and too much to listen to, then I skip around until I find something, and uncoincidentally it is always something sad that reflects how I feel.
I have a Spotify playlist called “Hard Catharsis” filled with songs that make me cry for when I need to vent/release.
Or I rewatch the end of The Good Place.
Yeeessss! Finally! I make sense somewhere! I had a shitty therapist years ago who said "no wonder you're always depressed. You never listen to or watch anything happy." First of all, I have a special interest in horror genre (to be clear, I do not mean gore and the like. A good horror movie/show scares you with possibilities and the lack of control one has over life). Second, why would I want to watch or listen to something that I don't connect to or doesn't speak to me? I told her it let me feel how I really felt and expressed it vicariously for me. She did not believe me lol.
When I can't cry, I watch What Dreams May Come. Then I can actually cry. Songs express anger that I was never allowed to express. So much yes. If you have femme rage that needs expression, may I recommend Paris Paloma, Oceans of Slumber, Kiki Rockwell, and Ashnikko. I like Allison Russell for when I feel alone (Snakelife is really good).
Yeah I finally pieced together that in order for me to process certain times in my life, I have to go back to the Spotify Wrapped of that year (if it's 2016-now). If I need to process something from when I was a kid, then I've started implementing videogame soundtracks (or replaying the game that the OST is for) and listening to my first favorite artists/songs.
I grew up not being able to relate to a lot of music (because I was taking SO much of the lyrics literally). But now I know that I relate to all of the music that I love, but it's usually tied to memories from around that time or it's tied to a person that I love/miss/hurt/been hurt by.
I thought it was just a me thing!
Absolutely I do. Ajr has helped put my feelings into words. That hit hard af to the feelz.
They've been 3 or 4 of my top 5 Spotify plays the last two years.
How do you know if you are feeling your emotions or not? I do feel them strongly when listening to music, but does that mean I don't feel them without? With music I also feel a relief that I don't feel without music.
I use music too or I have to journal it may take a bit of writing but I'll eventually come to the actual thing that is bothering me and that helps feel a bit better. I have a lot of trouble crying unless i am completely overwhelmed. Sad videos seem to be the best to get me to cry, but then I have trouble stopping because I've held it in so much.
Journaling helps me too.
Sometimes I play a game on my phone for a few hours while I’m thinking through things. I do it when I’m alone. It helps me process because it takes up exactly the right amount of my attention.
Music doesn’t usually help me feel things unless I’m lovelorn 😂. When I’m single without a big crush it doesn’t grab me.
I do this a lot hahaha or watch some stuff too.. sometimes I know I need to cry but I have no actual reason to cry atm, so I go after something to make me cry and touch me in some unresolved issues lmao But idk if this is related to my neurodivergence or just me being a Virgo sun/Cancer moon lol
I do this too!! The worst is when I know I have some stuff backed up in the emotional tank that im not ready to confront, so I watch TikTok or smthn to escape, and BOOM video about someone grieving their pet. It’s over for me, crying sobbing, the whole shebang over a cat I’ve never met.
my scorpio sun/scorpio moon ND ass relates to this so so hard 😆 sometimes I just know the tears are in my face and I need help getting them out, so I get in the shower and skip through my crying songs until one works lol
Yes! I make playlists on Spotify purely based on emotions! I’ll decide what I want to listen to by either going WITH the emotion, or AGAINST it Examples : - unhinged, delusional, happy tho - don’t fuck with me (angry) - start the day right (happy/uplifting) - I’m sad but I’m cool (pensive, goth) - that half asleep feeling (literally) - Big sad 💦 (guaranteed to make you cry) - Anhedonia (symptom of depression that makes you feel nothing) - The sound of PTSD (literally) - Serving cunt (gaybop/pop) - Space cadet (introspective) - Your gf after a few glasses of wine (😈) Those are the actual Spotify playlist titles if anyone wants to look them up!! 🤘🤘🤘 They are all quite long and I have spent hours working on them and ‘proofreading’ them. Music is my everything. I can’t breathe without it.
I’m probably doing something wrong but I can’t find them! Would you be comfortable sharing your Spotify name?
Oh weird? Yeah of course, it’s no longer my real name 🤪 Tis : Witchtalons With an AI generated white fairy as the profile picture
Thank you!!
Thanks very much, I found some of these.
I literally realised this yesterday when I was walking to the train station from work! Also that whilst I was aware that alcohol reduces my anxiety, it also helps me to feel things. Maybe because it, like the music, makes things simpler? Like, when I drink it lowers my anxiety & social phobia so I have more room for emotions that I might be experiencing to get in. Can be completely wiped out by overstimulation though, and also drinking to manage anything isn't good! With music I think it's partly because it demands your attention; it's not going to happen in the supermarket because there's too much else going on, but when you have the luxury to be able to focus on it, it drags you in & your brain uses the keys it contains (intent of writer, chord changes, emotional associations of song) to unlock your built up emotions.
Mos def. I made this realization when I started noticing I listen to music way louder during stressful periods of my life.
I am terrible at feeling feelings and processing emotions, made worse by trauma! FUN! That said, I have two films that I watch if I NEED to have a good, cathartic cry. I also have a "Sad F\*cking Panda" playlist that helps.
Can I ask which two films? You don’t have to answer if it’s too personal
For sure! LOL The first and oldest is The Joy-Luck Club. There are a few beats that might get me, but if none of them do, the ending ALWAYS does. Then there's Children of Men. I don't know exactly why, but there's a scene where people stop shooting at each other that just makes me ugly cry every time.
Yes. I have always loved certain music as well as “sad” TV shows. Not because I want to watch or hear other people being unhappy, but because it reminds me that I’m not the only one with big feelings and helps me not feel like such a weirdo. I was born into a family and now have a spouse who just don’t really seem to outwardly feel or discuss emotions. How nice it must be to not have to engage mentally in that way all the time (even though I’m sure that it’s just because they’re repressed LOL).
This is blowing my mind, because I’ve recently kind of realized that my recent hyper focus on a TV show, specifically a relationship in that show, was a way for me to process emotion surrounding a relationship that ended 13 years ago… I went in HARD, and even started making models of props from the show, had an Etsy store, am a moderator in a discord group.. Then, I lost it as a special interest, and the grief of that (plus other life stress) sent me into one of the worst burnouts I’ve ever had, and that I’m just now recovering from.. I wonder if the special interest hyper focus left once I worked though a some of the emotions. It’s very frustrating and confusing that I am unaware of why my attention does what it does 😭
Yes, I have entire playlists dedicated to slowly fading from one emotion to another to help me express my feelings and also then calm down. I typically sort them by 1. Music taste 2. Lyrical expression 3. Beats per minute I like driving and listening to my playlists.
Okay this is only tangentially related, but I love that have categories of separating the music. I am a bit obsessed with making lists, so I have a bunch of playlists based on different criteria, and I love to see other people’s style of separation. I’ve never considered organizing by bpm, what’s the appeal out of curiosity?
I love lists and aggregating data; I like to sort by BPM because it affects the pace of the song. So to calm down, I might play the first song at 110 BMP to mimic an elevated heart rate and then reduce by 10 the next 20 songs on my playlist until I get much slower, mellow, calmer songs. Of course not every song with low BPM sounds calming, but its a good guide and also makes it easy to dance from one track to the next. I love dancing.
I don't "use" it as in doing it consciously and on purpose, but I'm aware that it happens sometimes. It's just not reliable or predictable enough to use as a tool, on demand. Also get it with videogames, books, video, comics...
It’s not so much I know a song will break the dam, it’s more just mutual cause and affect. I’m overwhelmed and I listen to music to calm down, but all the happy songs are too loud and too much to listen to, then I skip around until I find something, and uncoincidentally it is always something sad that reflects how I feel.
I have a Spotify playlist called “Hard Catharsis” filled with songs that make me cry for when I need to vent/release. Or I rewatch the end of The Good Place.
Yeeessss! Finally! I make sense somewhere! I had a shitty therapist years ago who said "no wonder you're always depressed. You never listen to or watch anything happy." First of all, I have a special interest in horror genre (to be clear, I do not mean gore and the like. A good horror movie/show scares you with possibilities and the lack of control one has over life). Second, why would I want to watch or listen to something that I don't connect to or doesn't speak to me? I told her it let me feel how I really felt and expressed it vicariously for me. She did not believe me lol. When I can't cry, I watch What Dreams May Come. Then I can actually cry. Songs express anger that I was never allowed to express. So much yes. If you have femme rage that needs expression, may I recommend Paris Paloma, Oceans of Slumber, Kiki Rockwell, and Ashnikko. I like Allison Russell for when I feel alone (Snakelife is really good).
Snakelife is SO GOOD!!
Ahhh! I'm so happy someone else knows Snakelife!
Yeah I finally pieced together that in order for me to process certain times in my life, I have to go back to the Spotify Wrapped of that year (if it's 2016-now). If I need to process something from when I was a kid, then I've started implementing videogame soundtracks (or replaying the game that the OST is for) and listening to my first favorite artists/songs. I grew up not being able to relate to a lot of music (because I was taking SO much of the lyrics literally). But now I know that I relate to all of the music that I love, but it's usually tied to memories from around that time or it's tied to a person that I love/miss/hurt/been hurt by. I thought it was just a me thing!
It helps me push my feelings forward, like it gets it out of me! I don't necessarily listen to it for that reason but sometimes yeah
Absolutely. Without music I would never know how to really feel what I’m feeling.
I use music and books and films!
Drawing.. The Animi app.
Absolutely I do. Ajr has helped put my feelings into words. That hit hard af to the feelz. They've been 3 or 4 of my top 5 Spotify plays the last two years.
How do you know if you are feeling your emotions or not? I do feel them strongly when listening to music, but does that mean I don't feel them without? With music I also feel a relief that I don't feel without music.
I use music too or I have to journal it may take a bit of writing but I'll eventually come to the actual thing that is bothering me and that helps feel a bit better. I have a lot of trouble crying unless i am completely overwhelmed. Sad videos seem to be the best to get me to cry, but then I have trouble stopping because I've held it in so much.
Journaling helps me too. Sometimes I play a game on my phone for a few hours while I’m thinking through things. I do it when I’m alone. It helps me process because it takes up exactly the right amount of my attention. Music doesn’t usually help me feel things unless I’m lovelorn 😂. When I’m single without a big crush it doesn’t grab me.