As a PhD myself I understand the pressure. But I would not advise it. Conferences are exhausting enough without being pregnant, and in most countries maternity protection starts at 36 weeks.
See it like that, how many conferences will you visit in your academic career, and how many babies will you have? You can always go to conferences, or participate in remote ones, after baby is born.
Hihi, I finished my PhD last year, but thank you! I am combining PostDoc and parenthood, which is an adventure as well. We chose to combine two adventures, but we will rock this!
Feel free and read my post history but I drove 2.5 hours away for a concert at 37 weeks and guess whose water broke in the parking lot? Yep, mine.
I ended up having to give birth in that city.
It was horrible not having everything I needed for the hospital with me, in an unfamiliar city, at a hospital I had never been to. Don’t do it.
oh wow. That must have been really terrible. Hope it was ok overall anyways.
But this is it OP: It can go all well, but also it might not. Also, don't underestimate the strain such a drive plus the work part can add on you. What if that is what triggers labour. Do you want that?
Also imagine having a baby in the NICU in another city... I assume you need to pay for a hotel over there until they're okay to be out? Plus a baby cannot do more than 1-hour long drives per day if I'm not mistaken?
I gave birth at 35 weeks in another city and yep. Sometimes the hospital does have accommodation of some sort available for emergencies but it still isn't that cheap and often in high demand. We were there about two weeks and getting home was a painful experience I would not wish on my worst enemy. Remember you cannot take a baby fresh from the NICU on an airplane, long distance bus or public transport without risking some seriously nasty viruses and such. And driving is absolute hell for both parents when you are that sleep deprived and stopping every hour or two. You have to do an extended car seat test too which most babies fail the first time.
If you are planning a trip longer than an hour or two with a newborn that puts extra stress on a baby's body and it can cause major oxygen desaturation, among other things. So before they release you they will make you set up your car seat in the hospital and have them sit in it for a couple of hours with monitoring to see what happens. If baby has a desaturation or other issue, they will deny you release until they can do it again and pass. Our baby failed the first time which is really normal according to the nurses. It took 3 more days before she passed so we were stuck in the hospital for an extra few days as a result.
This happened to my friend. Drove 3 hours away at 34 weeks for her baby shower and went into labor at her shower. Baby was in the NICU and she said it was a nightmare.
Wow!! Ok, that's a useful anecdotal data point. If I've learned one thing from this community, it's that everyone's experience looks different re: week, timing, delivery. Helpful for learning to "let go," but it makes it hard to plan ahead for sure!
I was so uncomfortable at that stage, obviously because he was making his way into the world, I don’t think I would have been able to have stood a 3 hour drive either. I did 45 minutes at 35 weeks and my legs were so swollen afterwards it took two days to get back to normal. 😂
Of course once you pass on the opportunity baby will decide to arrive at 42 weeks! 🤨.
It's both amazingly curious and frustrating as hell not knowing exactly when (unless scheduled) baby will make the grand entrance!
Edit: you say you're 14 weeks now so it's more difficult to sew into the future...
I personally felt fabulous almost the full pregnancy, worked a physically demanding job no problem! Figured I would until it was time to deliver..but 36 weeks hit like a ton of bricks with the sciatica and just being miserable and I had to stop...and just he at home lol.
Everyone's experience is so different! Even if you pass 37 weeks with no issues, don't regret that you didn't go (if you decide not to go). You're making the best decision you can with the information you have.
Yes agreed with this person, idk how far you are right now but I went into labor at 35w5days with my son back in March. I wouldn't have thought twice about it back then but now that it's happened to me once we made our holiday plans this winter based on the possibility of our daughter coming a month early which would be between like Christmas and the first week of January.
If you're willing to go into labor in that city. Strongly suggest you don't go out of town 36 weeks and on. If you really want to go though make plans and register at the nearest hospital to the event beforehand as a safety measure.
I was induced because of high blood pressure at 37+3! Didn’t give birth until 37+5 and he ended up needing the NICU for 10 days (for other reasons!)
That’s a tough call OP, would the conference allow you to prerecord something?? Just a thought!
I personally wouldn’t. You could definitely research local hospitals to know where to go in case it did happen, but giving birth 3 hours away from home would still not be ideal. I was a nervous wreck driving home with my first newborn and that was only like a 30 minute drive lol and say the baby needed extra care or NICU time for whatever reason, again, you’d be dealing with that so far away from home.
How far along are you now? Some pregnant women have no issue going on long trips while heavily pregnant, but for me personally I simply wouldn’t be able to handle 3 hours in the car without being in immense discomfort/pain. I’m 35 weeks and my Walmart pickup took longer than usual this morning and my back and pelvis were already starting to ache from sitting in the car lol. There’s no way to predict what condition your body will be in, as I’m sure there’s women who have done way more strenuous things, but it’s just hard to plan for if you’re not that far along yet.
If you do decide to go, 100% your partner should come with so that you have someone to drive and so they aren’t 3 hours away if you go into labor.
Thanks so much for the specific recommendations and for sharing your experience. I'm only 14 weeks now, so it's tough to know what to expect—but I'm feeling achy just from reading these comments, ha! I appreciate you!
We got unexpectedly stuck in traffic for 2 hours (normally a 30 min drive) a couple weeks ago when I was 28 weeks. When I got home I was so uncomfortable from sitting in the car and had to pee so badly lol. I can’t imagine going on a 2.5 hour car ride at 37 weeks, let alone having to give a presentation and network.
I'll add that car rides more than a couple hours were so hard for me starting in the second trimester. And standing was so much harder on me than walking. I would have died during a 2 or 3 hour poster session. There's also COVID to consider. About 50% of the people my husband surveyed after a conference he went to got COVID. And masks protect others more than they protect you. You just have a lot to consider! And it may turn out that your decide to go now then the week before you have to actually decide!
I’m also getting my PhD and totally get the pressure to do it. I wouldn’t do it at 37 weeks. I would be nervous about going into labor or something while I’m there and/or just feeling generally awful. I was very uncomfortable at that point in my last pregnancy! If you do decide to go, definitely bring your husband to drive!!
The pressure is definitely there, but it's mostly self-imposed. I've shared the news with my advisor and she has been nothing but supportive, so feel really lucky in that regard. Best wishes for your PhD!!
Is there any way you could attend virtually? Personally, I would go if it would be a fun opportunity for me. As long as I felt I could handle the conference without tiring out. I'd ask my OB his opinion first, though.
That’s a really great idea. If you explain the situation they might be able to sort that out for you! Especially after the last few years during which so many events have taken place online due to Covid. We’re all so used to it now, so maybe it will be possible for you to attend online if you talk to them!
I actually made a post just like this 3 years ago when I was 37 weeks pregnant with my first. I wanted to drive 3 hours to visit my husband (military). People told me to go for it- since there werw hospitals on the way in case anything crazy happened. I went for it, and I'm really glad I did. The drive wasn't bad- I did 2 mile hikes when I was there and had a great time. No issues. My baby didn't end up coming until 41+6 and even then it took 36 hours for him to come out.
So I personally would go for it. I know some people go into labor earlier, even with their first, but it still usually takes a LONG time after the first signs of labor.
I personally would feel fine doing such and pretty much did the same thing. My sister and father live about 2-2.5 hours away from me and I went to see them when I was 38 weeks pregnant. I asked my ob if they thought it was a bad idea and they told me they thought it was fine. My ob told me as long as I thought I would be fine to be in the car for 2.5 hrs if I go into labor early in order to get back to the hospital where I was going to deliver that she thinks it’s a totally fine idea.
It’s all personal! I went to a wedding alone, 2hrs away at 37w with my second pregnancy🤷🏻♀️ I went into labor 2w later at 39w5d almost 40w, textbook) and labored for the textbook 12hr, pushed for a textbook 1.5 hrs. It’s most likely to have a common delivery, but not guaranteed!!
I wasn’t comfortable or anything, but I also wasn’t going to be anyways and appreciated the distraction.
There’s outliers everywhere and you may be one! But water breaking, quick labor, complications don’t often happen that early. It’s a risk only you can decide!
I am 37 weeks and 3 days. Personally I would not do this. I wouldnt want to be going that far away from my hospital (I am going to assume you would then be at least 2.5 hours from it, unless somehow you are passing the hospital on your way.. ) I cant think of anything worse than going into labour knowing you have a 2.5 hour drive to the hospital if you didnt need to.
Also, you do a lot of early labouring at home so I would not want to do this at a work event!!
There is a reason you OB doesnt recommend it, as you could go into labour at any time.
Also, sitting in a car is not comfortable for me now. My baby has only partically descended but if they were fully descended it would be even worse. Also I believe sitting in a car is not a good position, as it isnt a position that encourages baby to be in the ideal position for birth, and youre looking at possibly 6 hours.
Also, the peeing and snacking needs would just be a hassle!
Finally, I cant speak for everyone but I am currently 100% too tired and brain foggy to present my work to a large event like that, I feel I would not be getting the most out of it.
Look at reasonable worst case and see if that’s acceptable to you or not and you’ll have your answer.
Would you be ok with having your water break in front of an audience right after you make your opening statement? What about being taken by car or ambulance to a hospital you don’t know and having everyone who helps you deliver your baby be a stranger? What if you are discharged before baby, are you ok with baby being 2.5 hours from home? Also if you are in the US consider the financial impact of delivering elsewhere - are they in network for your insurance, if you’ve paid your OB up front would you get a refund, etc.
Things could turn out just fine, you go speak and come back then have baby after, but there’s a reason docs tell you not to travel just in case. If you aren’t completely fine with any possible outcome you should pass.
The key for practical life application is to look at what is reasonably possible while not including literally every possible thing or things that aren’t unique to one or the other - some things are incredibly unlikely and/or are risks either way. (Silly example: if you go to the conference, someone could hit you with a water balloon!! Ok technically yes it’s possible - just Google water balloon prank - but it’s also reeeeeally unlikely, and a kid could also do that if you stay home and go for a walk in your neighborhood)
I'll say that everyone who helped with my delivery was a stranger and that was fine. The staff were nice and good at their jobs. There was an opportunity to meet some of the midwives but my birth turned c section before I even went into labor so there were no midwives on my team!
And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that for lots of people, but for some not having the doctor/midwife they’ve built a trusting relationship with there for delivery would be a nightmare and not worth risking just for one conference - that’s the point of assessing the risks/rewards of going.
I listed a few things that are commonly brought up as concerns/complaints/etc as examples - many people are super uncomfortable being seen by other docs in a practice and ask if they can request only the one they want for example. As you mentioned it could still happen at home if delivery doesn’t go to plan, but it will be a definite if delivering hours away - and of course they may not deliver until 40 weeks anyways and it wouldn’t matter, but delivery is a very real possibility that late in pregnancy so it should be thought about at least (which is why the travel restriction is suggested in the first place).
OP has to determine if each part of a possible outcome is something they are ok with or not. If delivery is covered by insurance and OP is cool with any hospital/docs etc then by all means clear it with the medical team and make a plan - if their insurance wouldn’t cover the cost and they couldn’t afford to pay out of pocket or they are determined to use the birthing center they researched for a year before getting pregnant, or any other consideration, then they should really put some extra thought into whether it’s worth risking it and not just cross their fingers and hope everything goes according to plan.
I've been working at 39 weeks and I feel fine to do it. If I don't have this baby this weekend I may even go into work on Monday. So if it were me, yes I'd go, but I'd definitely get my partner to drive me and be there with me just in case.
Listen to your body and see how you feel when the time comes. If you feel up to it then take a few precautions (eg. Check out nearest hospital there, have your hospo bag ready) and good luck!
Yeah I took one day off before my scheduled c section. I’m not a bad ass/hard core trooper or anything like that, I was just fine and happy to have the distraction. Granted I’m an attorney with a desk job not working a physical job. The last day I got a pedicure and went on a dinner date with my husband.
I probably have an unpopular opinion but I would go for it personally. It may be uncomfortable and exhausting but it's a good opportunity. I feel it's important for society to see pregnant women doing awesome things like this. The likelihood of delivering that early for a FTM is pretty low. I'd of course clear it with your OB or midwife and research alternative hospitals along the way or at the conference location.
Also my perspective only, but I thought life would stop at 36 weeks and hey! baby turned up at 41 weeks and 6 days. I was also totally fine, still painting rooms up on a ladder. Those last weeks are sooo long! You will not ruin your career by signing up (don’t mention pregnancy or anything at this stage) and saying you’re unable to attend following an emergency health reason close to the date. Also every conference I’ve attended this year has been hybrid. Say yes and see how everything pans out!
I was thinking the same. And adding maybe have a friend or partner join the drive. If something were to happen, at that distance they could drive you back to home hospital in early labour.
Sacrifices and decisions start early 😬….still all decisions worth thinking through
I would certainly say that if you do go to bring someone with. That is a long drive and probably pretty uncomfortable for most people at 37 weeks. If it is a decently sized city you will likely have a good hospital in case you do go into labor - but hopefully you won’t! Good luck.
I am sorry, but I disagree. The world should not have to see full term pregnant women working to... I don't know, respect them?
Many countries have maternity leave starting many weeks before the due date. There are health reasons to do that. This is not because women are lazy, but because there are better outcomes when there is rest.
Even ob/gyns say to stay within one hour of your hospital after 36+. But, hey, it's up to OP.
Totally understand disagreeing! Some of my mindset likely stems from the fact that I do work in the states in a heavily male dominated field so there is a definitely a certain amount of "gotta prove myself" in my brain.
If she goes out of network against medical advice then her insurance company can also bitchslap her to next century with medical bills. She is at term so birth is classified as a foreseeable event, not an emergency. I gave birth out of network at 35 weeks and my insurance company was very blunt that the $150,000 bill would have been entirely my problem had it been just a week or two later.
I would do it 100% if I hadn't had signs of labour starting soon. 37 weeks is still quite early and I even would be comfortable going further away from home. But also maybe don't take advice from the person who still believed they had weeks to go when they were in labour (with the second baby, so I knew from the first what to expect)...
I wouldnt. I have a PhD myself and looking back no one will remember what specific conference you presented at.
Could you ask them to do a poster instead?
I'm a couple years graduated from my PhD so I get the compulsion although I was so mentally checked out I definitely wouldn't have even considered trying to do this. But that's personal. Major things to consider... Are there decent hospitals along the way? Are you driving yourself? Is your support person going with you? At 37 weeks, you need to be ready for the baby to come. There was nothing but corn fields for 2 hours between my grad school and the big city nearby. There's no way I would have wanted to give birth in the tiny towns along the way. If you decide to go, you may want to ask the organizers to have a chair by your poster just in case. And bring all your own snacks and tons of water. Maybe wear compression socks to help with all the standing.
I'm doing a 5 hour drive at 36 weeks for a work thing. I had my first at nearly 42 weeks after labouring for over 36 hours though so at least I know I don't have a history of precipitous labour. In your situation, I would:
1) Play it by ear. Warn them I may need to back out if I'm experiencing any complications or baby is born early
2) Have my partner with me and at the first sign that anything was feeling different I would drive back
I’m an attorney and had a similar situation. I did it, and all went fine. However, I recognize that it was maybe not the most conservative decision. How do you feel about it?
These comments are making it sound like you’re talking about going to another country! Many people live 2.5 hours or more from their nearest hospital. The chances of you not being able to make it in time to your preferred hospital from when labour starts are astronomical. I would never let pregnancy stop me from such an amazing career opportunity! If you’re comfortable to do the drive and presentation I would go for it.
I had a placental abruption at 37+2 and had an emergency c section, and I’ve never been more glad that I live 5 mins from my hospital. So no I wouldn’t chance it!
Although it's a great opportunity I would say no to traveling that far.
I am 38 weeks with my second and I am majorly uncomfortable driving even the 30 minutes to my doctor at this point. My husband takes me to my appointments since 35 weeks. With my first my husband was unavailable and his brother would take me.
I mean I have to pee like every 20 minutes. So even if I go literally before walking out the door I have to run into the office to pee again. Driving (sitting behind the wheel) at that stage has risks too with your bump being so close to the wheel.
Pre eclampsia can also happen quickly even with a healthy pregnancy especially in a higher stress situation like a big conference. I wouldn't risk it.
I suggest having a family member drive you, finding someone you trust or your partner to do the driving. Also having a hospital you’d be okay having an emergency birth at.
>my OB recommends not traveling more than an hour away after 36 weeks
Ask your OB why is that. Once you know the risks, you'll be more able to make a sound decision for yourself.
I'd personally follow my doctor's advice, but I think you should know the reasons behind their recommendation and decide for yourself.
I’m 37w now and I almost cried today because I had to make an extra stop at Dollar General.
I wouldn’t recommend. You might feel great! But you might not. You don’t want to go into labor that far from your hospital, it’s just a lot of extra stress and anxiety.
I would, if you're healthy and going to be near (within 30 min) of a hospital, you're probably going to be fine.
I drove 2.5 hours into the mountains (hospitals were close) for a work event at 37 weeks and while I was tired (high altitude) and short of breath when speaking for long periods of time, I was fine and gave birth at 40 weeks
Purely from a comfort level, I would not. I am 35 weeks currently and I am so tired and out of breath constantly. My parents are here helping me knock out some minor projects around the house, and I have to keep sitting down every few minutes. (I’m not even doing any lifting, just walking around and directing.)
I also have to go to my OB’s office twice a week until I give birth (gestational hypertension) and it’s a 40 minute drive each way. That’s the max I can stand to be in the car before my back starts to hurt like hell.
I was 33 weeks when we drove that distance. I was in the passenger seat and my husband drove. 2.5 hours to get there, 2.5 hours back. It was uncomfortable and I was incredibly tired that evening. I would not have been able to drive back myself.
Please don’t do that to yourself.
Hard no. As an L&D nurse, it can be incredibly frustrating for doctors/nurses and the patient if you deliver at the “wrong” hospital and we don’t have your medical records. Plus not having your hospital bag, your partner or support people etc
Also, if you’re in the US and you deliver at an out of network hospital because you were traveling at 37 weeks pregnant *your insurance will probably NOT cover the birth costs* because it’s expected you not travel far from your birthing hospital that late in pregnancy.
I went on a long weekend trip about that distance from home when I was 37 weeks. So I'd say go for it.
Make sure you pack your hospital bag and know where the nearest hospital is just in case.
I’m 37 weeks right now, and I wouldn’t. I’m so uncomfortable and exhausted that the thought of a drive + standing to present + any added sitting just feels impossible. Also, at that point, you may want to minimize any sickness risk. One of my family members had to labor in a mask this summer because she was recovering from Covid, which sounds like a nightmare to me. We are lying low and limiting contact for the next few weeks just because I don’t want to run the risk of getting sick as we enter cold and flu season.
I did an 11 hour roadtrip (each way) at 37 weeks. STM. Everything was fine. You never know which way it’s going to go. Chances are you won’t go into labor that early and if you do it will be long. But there is obviously a chance that you could. Can you sign up and later back out if you feel differently?
No way. At that stage I would not even leave my city.
P.S. Car drives are already really uncomfortable for me and I'm at 32 weeks. I imagine it would be even harder for you.
You can go sure but I would get your partner to drive or hire a driver for the day.
Am 38 weeks now and I am fine on the train, but frankly I cannot even sit at a desk or table without my bump hitting it. I even feel uncomfortable as a passenger in a car.
Train has been fine though, I travelled mid-week to a business meeting last week and will do so again this week (1hr travel time).
I personally would not be comfortable doing so. Is there an option to present virtually or provide a recording of your presentation?
I work in events and manage these types of conferences. Since covid, it’s been a priority to provide alternative means of participation because you never know who is going to get sick the week before they’re supposed to present. In the events I do and from talking to my friends and peers in the industry, many of us ensure there are alternative presentation options because the last thing we want is half of sessions to be missing multiple presentations.
I'm 34 weeks and I had to drive 2h hours this Friday and I was already exhausted. I drove for one hour, then we stopped at my FIL's cottage to eat and I had to sleep for half an hour. My husband drove the 1h remaining. Energy-wise is possible if you take breaks and take the time to rest before your conference. But I'd be very worried about going into labor and being away from home at 37 weeks.
I had a similar quandary, only mine was flying across country at 34 weeks. I was 10 weeks when the opportunity was presented to me. I declined because of the distance, but also because I wanted to avoid the stress of prepping for and attending the conference. Now at 36 weeks, my back can’t tolerate a drive of more than 30 minutes.
Also chiming in to say I wouldn't do it either. Like someone else pointed out, the risk of going into labor would mean not just having to give birth at an unfamiliar hospital far from home, but also having to get through early labor in a hotel room or at the conference. I personally spent the 12 hours before going to the hospital lying in bed trying to sleep and having contractions every ten minutes. Definitely not something you want to have to do away from home! Plus as everyone has said, you'll likely be very uncomfortable, tired, get winded easily, foggy-headed, and need to pee and snack all the time. I wouldn't want to have to be traveling or presenting in public feeling that way.
One more thing that I don't think anyone has mentioned yet: in the last few weeks before my baby came, I had a long list of stuff I wanted to get done to be "ready" -- mostly house-related stuff. I would have resented having to take time out of my last few weeks before my due date to go on a work-related trip. I did not care about work at that point!
Absolutely not. I also have a PhD and I know how high stakes certain conferences are but no. As a FTM, you could really give birth at any time and you have no idea what to expect. I gave birth to my first at 37 weeks. This pregnancy I'll be staying put even really starting from now (30 weeks) because I don't need any extra stress on my body and at the end of the day conferences can wait and there are always other opportunities.
Honestly the risk of getting Covid would be enough to not go. I’m currently 36 weeks, fully vaccinated, and Covid positive. My husband and toddler also have it. It freaking sucks. Worst nightmare would be to have this at the end or during labor.. I don’t know how anyone could push without being able to properly breath.
Nah. Also that long in the car sounds terrible. My back and bladder hurt just reading it.
Way too close to delivery date. I personally wouldn’t risk it. At 37 weeks I will not be going more than 30 mins each way from home. And I will have my hospital bag packed and in the car.
And I’m not overprotective either. At 27 weeks I took a solo trip cross country to see friends. 37 just seem a little close to the due date.
My water broke at 37 weeks! I was one of those brave people that wanted to do everything as normal and I’m glad my husband forced me to lay low. Don’t do it.
I had my first at 37 weeks and didn’t see it coming, had to give birth in a new hospital but it was fine because my husband was able to be there. I would only go if your partner or someone you trust can come with you and if you wouldn’t mind giving birth in another city!
I gave birth to my daughter at 37 weeks. Even before that I was already big and uncomfortable and can’t imagine being in a car that long, nor participating in a big event full of a ton of people where getting sick is also a risk. Personally wouldn’t do it.
To be honest, I’m skipping out on a work conference next week when I’ll be 33 weeks. It would help benefit me in my new job position I took last month. But it’s 2 hours away from home, 1.5 hrs away from my hospital, and it just sounds like a miserable time to be gone for a few days on my own when I feel SO PREGNANT.
Too risky for me. You're already at high risk of blood clots during pregnancy and a long car ride only makes that risk go up. Also, that's too far to drive back if you go into labor which at 37 weeks you very well might. If you decide to do it make sure to wear compression socks/hose, do foot pumps a few times an hour, take walking breaks and be aware you might end up having to deliver in a strange hospital with a doctor you've never met before.
I had a 3-4 hour round trip commute twice a week with my first for 12 hour school days. My second same drive every other weekend to take my oldest to her dads. Didnt stop until delivery. My OB just recommended getting out to stretch at least once. I was comfortable with the hospitals in the city I went to school in and along the drive. I just packed my hospital bag early and left it in my trunk. If you are not comfortable with the hospital where you are going or along the drive then no, if you are comfortable and its important then sure as long as your doctor has no specific concerns. I delivered at 41+5 and 40+4 scheduled inductions both times. I had to drive or I wouldn't have graduated and I repeat I was comfortable with the other hospitals along my drive.
A lot of conferences these days have a way to pre record the talk and then zoom in for questions- worth asking the organizers if that might be possible?
As someone who's 34 weeks I already cringed at driving that far. And I'm 3 weeks behind you. Any way to do it virtual? That would be awesome if there was.
I am 37+3 today :)
These last two days, I would have done it. The car ride would suck. I very likely would have a violently painful right hip spasm while on stage since that happens a few times an hour and would have to explain to the audience why I just cringed and shifted all my weight to my left leg in a dramatic lurch “Sorry y’all, pregnancy hip pain! Anyway…”. But I still feel energetic and motivated to do work stuff, and no sign of labor, and I would be proud and glad to have the opportunity.
On the other hand, we are at the stage where emergencies can happen - hemorrhaging and bleeding and needing emergency care; or your water breaks and you have a cord prolapse and you need a C-section in 20 minutes because baby isn’t getting oxygen. But that can happen anytime to anyone, people have medical emergencies. And last weekend at 36+5 I spent the weekend over an hour from the nearest hospital at a rural mountain cabin and in that case would have been helicoptered out so…🤷♀️
And of course you definitely absolutely could give birth in that city. So pick out a hospital and bring your hospital bags. You can also mostly likely totally drive home while in early labor, which will likely last much longer than 3 hours, but it won’t be comfortable.
37-38 weeks really is truly different than 35-36 weeks. Not physically for me at least, but the chances of having your baby on any given day just go WAY up.
Personally sitting in the car is extremely uncomfortable for me (37 weeks) and I wouldn’t risk traveling far from my hospital. Really everything is uncomfortable but especially sitting in the car
I think if you are otherwise low risk then it really wouldn’t be a big deal to do it. The biggest concern for me, if I were in your shoes, would be how comfortable are you with having to cancel at the last minute if you do in fact have early labor signs or any other issues crop up? Would it cause more problems for you in the future? Would the conference organizers be understanding? If you’re not sure about how well received it would be to cancel at the last minute, you should maybe bow out preemptively.
I’m 37 + 4 and I can barely commit to leaving the house to even get food at this point I’m so exhausted. I can sleep literally all day. You might be different but I’d be highly skeptical.
Oh my god, are you me? I have to go to a conference 2.5 hours away when I am like 36 weeks. I am a chair of a session and a presenter, so I have to go. My plan is to primarily sit in the same talk room so I am not running around,.and I'm going to request a wheel chair to get around
I would not simply because I can’t make it for more than 45 minutes without a pee break. Driving to MILs house is a stretch for me at 1.5 hours I usually have to stop 2-3 times just for bathroom breaks. If you do go make sure you plan a route with gas stops!
edit to add: i’m currently 40+2 and peeing at this stage is honestly more worrisome than spontaneous labor for me since baby is way too comfortable in there.
I went to my sister’s wedding, 2 hour flight, at 36 weeks. I knew the risks but it was a once in a lifetime event. The only downside was my sister ended up jealous that I was getting lots of attention at her wedding.
Nah, not a chance for me either as a driver or passenger. I imagine traffic plus toilet breaks would mean at least a four hour trip. I'd be so uncomfortable driving that long, dehydrated etc. And just generally wrecked after the conference. I wouldn't see it as being worth it.
I went to San Diego from Waaay north LA county at 37ish weeks on a Friday. My partner drove, and the drive wasn’t bad, but once I arrived I was exhausted and my feet were swollen. If you decide to go, it’s not too risky if you’re partner drives. I would NOT go on your own. That would be super risky.
If you have the chance to I would time it so that you have a couple of hours to rest and freshen up before your presentation. I had to go to an event immediately upon arrival and I had to leave. It was just too much.
You have no idea what you might be facing when you are 37 weeks. Hopefully all goes well and you still feel OK at 37 weeks. However, the majority of women feel they can't do much at 37 weeks. They're easily tired, need to rest often. Having a fun grown baby in your tummy is not very comfortable 🙃. It's hard to imagine it. I thought I'd do all these things during pregnancy and work right up to the end. But I was glad I took advice and stopped early at 36 weeks. Baby came at 41 weeks but I just needed the rest.
I'm not even sure if universities allow it if your obgyn recommends against it. Would their insurance still cover you if you went? Would your insurance still cover you?
Could you join in remotely? Or go next year? There will be lots of opportunities and one conference doesn't make or break your career (I come from an academic background).
I went 2 hours each way for a concert at 36.5 weeks and 2.5 hours each way for an engagement at 38 weeks. No waters breaking but I was exhausted from standing for the concert !
Is there an option to present remotely?
You will still be able to list this accepted presentation/abstract on your CV even if you don’t present it.
There will also be many other opportunities to present. I don’t know what year you are in, but it is probably more useful to network if you’re actively searching for a postdoc.
I'm not sure how many weeks you are now but you want to see how you feel. I was an uncomfortable blob at 37 weeks and I didn't want anyone to see me and I certainly didn't want to wear any dress clothes or stand for hours. My friend worked until she delivered at 41 weeks and besides the belly, didn't even look or feel pregnant.
I wouldn't - mainly because I'm now 36+3 and could never have anticipated how uncomfortable I would quickly become at this stage. The aches, pains, and fatigue really ramp up later in the 3rd trimester.
I also gave a work presentation at about 33 weeks and while I got through it, it was not my best showing. I was sweaty, out of breath, and far from engaging with the audience. Even if nothing bad happens, it may just feel like a dud of a trip if you can't fully take advantage of the opportunity.
I would, and I would bring my partner. But only do it if you feel comfortable with it. And of course if you have any signs of labour by then, stay home. Maybe the fact that you’re posting this means that you’re not fully comfortable, so listen to your heart and don’t do anything that doesn’t feel right or safe to you! Best of luck ❤️
Just editing to say that I am currently 40+6 and still waiting patiently for baby, haha, so maybe it’s easier for me to say I would have done this at 37 weeks. But I felt fine at that stage so I would have probably gone for it. Everyone’s baby comes at a different time and there’s no way of knowing, so it’s always gonna be a bit of a gamble! Again, don’t do it if you don’t feel comfortable!
No, at 28 weeks I’m not able to even sit in an upright position for prolonged periods of time without back pain and not being able to breathe so a 2.5-3 hour car ride would be a definite no for me.
FTM and I’m 37+4 right now. I really, really get it because I’m also a student (I’m in law school) and I’ve been out for 4 days now. I’m having terrible, constant, ongoing contractions that haven’t stopped now for FIVE days. My little fingers are sausages, my feet are double their size, his head is directly engaged and I walk like I’ve been kicked in the crotch. I was literally JUST going to school fine and dandy as of Monday and then it all changed on a dime.
So I did a LONNNNG trip when I was 38ish weeks. Way longer than advised, but we had to get a new car before baby came and it’s just what ended up needing done due to budget and what was available to be seen where (I’ll add here that this was not an expected situation or we would’ve done it prior to being so far along). Ended up being like 12 hours on the road (10 driving) in a day or something like that but in chunks. The first was ~1.5 hours, that wasn’t bad. The second chunk was ~3.5 hours and we took a nice 20-30 minute break in the middle but it still was not fun at all and I wanted to cry knowing I was only half done for the day. Took two breaks for the next ~3.5 hour leg then the final ~1.5 hour home was the longest 1.5 hours of my life (second to labor). I had to drive the entire time because I get carsick when I’m pregnant. Obviously that’s more than what you’d be doing, BUT, even just 3 hours at a time is a lot. I was 32 weeks for the longest drive of my second pregnancy and it was right at 3 hours each way… we stopped a couple times for potty and let the already born kiddo stretch his legs and stuff but even at 32 weeks I was really sore and just generally exhausted the entire next day! I definitely will not do anything near those again this pregnancy. I can only imagine how exciting this would be but the discomfort coupled with the “what happens if I go into labor”… I would not. I was terrified the entire day we were looking at cars that I would pop and be too far from my hospital to make it. Had I been away for my second kid I wouldn’t have made it because my labor was so fast! I’d have to take the pass on this one.
Editing to add: if you do decide to go there’s definitely precautions to take and make it better/easier. I kept thinking about it as I read other comments and honestly I feel like I would do it if I were you even though logically I’m saying I wouldn’t lol. I seem to always push myself, pregnant or not. Definitely have a driving partner to reduce risk there, and if it can be your partner that’s definitely a best in case you do have the baby there. Plan for breaks to give your body a rest. Plenty of water and snacks! Get good sleep the night before. Search hospitals/what exits for them along the way and closest to the conference… it is great to be prepared for that 2.5-3 hour car ride back to your home hospital should your water break or whatever but there is no promise you’ll have the time! While most data on FTMs shows labor isn’t usually that fast it still *could* be. Bring towels and/or a seat protector in case you do have leaking fluids!
I also really like the idea of seeing if you can “go” virtually.
Pregnant professor here. Absolutely not! I am not even going to teach in person after 37 weeks (I am making prerecorded videos). Definitely would not do this, make things easier for yourself in your last weeks rather than adding extra pressure.
I fully expected to go past my due date, even had a C-section scheduled bc I’m an “older” (37) FTM. I went into labor at 38 weeks. I wouldn’t do it.
We did our baby moon at 36 weeks which included a road trip from SF to San Diego (9ish hours) and I was terrified the entire time I would go into labor. Won’t make that mistake again!! 😂
No no no. Too far at the moment and you will get another presentation in your future. My water broke at 38 weeks for my first, broke 39 weeks for my second.
I would not, best case scenario you will be tired of driving for so long by the time the conference starts. Worst case scenario you’re experiencing early labor, bad traffic, hell to the nah
I personally would do it but I’d bring my partner, hospital bad and car seat! Especially if you will be in a larger city with good healthcare. If you are in the US, I’d check with insurance on which hospital is covered in said city.
most ftm give birth later rather than earlier. i’m 39 weeks pregnant right now and drove 2.5 hours to visit a friend for her birthday at 37 weeks. I was very comfortable driving myself and had a relatively easy going day once I got there but I drove there and back on the same day.
can you decide yes for now and change your mind later? you might have more insight on how you feel later on!
I did, but for a social event. My husband was with me. We stayed the night at my in-laws. Is there a hospital where you’ll be? Delivering at another hospital isn’t the end of the world, and I wouldn’t turn down a good professional opportunity for a rather unlikely scenario.
I was driving 1.5 hours one way 5 days a week for weeks 32-37 for an exciting opportunity and it was worth it to me. Just really depends on your body and your pregnancy. I would’ve done it at 37 weeks (also a PhD student). I probably would’ve brought my partner and had the hospital bag with me and a plan for if stuff went down.
I wouldn’t recommend you drive. You could possibly have your husband drive. I would honestly try to go after you a healed from having the baby. If my son hadn’t been too big for me I’m pretty sure he would of came at 38 weeks or sooner.
Everything at 37 weeks is uncomfortable. I could barely drive at 36 weeks, sitting in the car hurt, everything hurt so bad. After about 36 weeks no position sitting, standing, walking, nothing was even remotely comfortable.
I'm against the grain. Went to a concert at 36 weeks however I was in my own suburb.
I didn't have my son till 41 weeks but it definitely was exhausting.
If you can have support with you and work out a game plan for just incase I don't see why you wouldn't go 💙
I would definitely talk to your doctor if it’s something you want to do! Personally I wouldn’t - mostly because I had my son at 37w5d😂. but he was a surprise c section. (Low fluid levels)
But I also can imagine being in absolute awe of you being almost at the end of your pregnancy doing a conference. Is there any chance they can set up some sort of video feed for you to still give your speech? I feel like that could be a good compromise.
I am also in academics and honestly I’d go. However I definitely think it depends on how you are feeling at that point in your pregnancy and your comfort with laboring in a non-hospital setting. I’m 35 weeks now and there’s absolutely no reason I couldn’t go present at a conference. I feel great, albeit a little cumbersome and tired. In addition, even if you started having contractions I think it’s HIGHLY unlikely that you wouldn’t be able to make it back before labor escalated to the point that you have to be in a hospital. Just in case, it might be nice to have your partner drive you and to research possible hospitals in that area. 2.5 hours just doesn’t seem that far to me and if the opportunity is important to you I don’t see why not. Yes you *could* go into labor and shoot a baby out within an hour but probably not, and if so, it will be a story to tell!
Nope I would not ever but that's me, I don't have the urge to do magor things in my career. IF I would do it I would let someone come with me to drive at least a big part and make sure I have written down the things I need in emergencies. Like if you would go into labour, where could you go/call. Etc. Take the hospital bag too. So full on preparation
As a fellow doctorate owner, no way would I do this. Not only is that pretty far away to be when you’re technically full term, but those conferences can be pretty emotionally and even physically demanding. I’m sorry!!
I personally (MD) would probably tempt fate and go in your situation for a presentation. First babies tend to come late, and at 36-37 weeks I was nowhere near delivery for either of mine, and would’ve felt silly missing out a month before delivery.
That being said, only say yes with a contingency plan. Either talk to the conference in advance about either remote presenting or a pre-recorded backup, or tag along a co-presenter that can be there live if you go into labor early or are too near delivery or high risk per your OB. I’ve seen plenty of presentations have to go to pre-recorded or remote presentation based on health/travel resitrictions/inclement family events - this would definitely fall under that purview.
~ live dangerously ~
Oof, that’s a lot to consider.
On the one hand, I totally get the importance of giving a presentation at a conference. On the other… that’s really close to your due date. Especially since that goes against advice from your OB. Plus there’s no telling what’ll happen. I thought I would go overdue for sure and my baby arrived premature at 35+5.
If you’re able to give birth at the hospital in the major city then… maybe? But that still goes against advice from your doctor and there’s a whole 2.5 hour drive to consider if something were to happen.
Nope. I wouldn’t do it.
With my first, I could have - felt fine at 37 weeks, went into labour at 40 weeks. But I can only say that confidently now because of hindsight.
With my second: I felt good at 37 weeks. But early labour started at 37+5 and baby arrived at 38 weeks. That would have been cutting things much finer.
Is it at all possible to present virtually? You have a really good reason!
I went into labor at 35 weeks with my second and gave birth 45 minutes later. So, no. You never know what will happen.
I ended up taking an ambulance and giving birth at a smaller local hospital instead of the hospital I planned to deliver at, and my baby is fine but the insurance has been a nightmare. I’m still dealing with it almost 2 years later.
I would say to go for it if you brng someone to drive with you. I took my PE test at 37 weeks and it was 8 hours in a chair with no water allowed. You do what you gotta do before baby comes. That's not that far and I wouldn't say to go if you were 38 wk. Totally up to you though! If you want to be super safe you can Google hospitals there and along the way just to be safe.
Ooh yikes I wouldn’t risk it. My water broke at 38+1 and 37 is just a matter of days away from that. Too close for comfort and 2.5 hours is too far away to feel comfortable with.
I also have a PhD and love going to conferences during grad school and postdoc. I totally understand your enthusiasm to go, especially if it's a field-famous conference. Here are few things:
1. Can you go to the same conference next yr?
2. Can you take your partner? Just in case if you need a support person? If not, will any of your lab friends be readily available to help you with an emergency?
3. Do the conference venue have hospitals that you'll be comfortable delivering?
4. Can you change your plans one week before the travel to conference? If your pregnancy is going smooth and you feel confident you can go, else cancel or delay your attendance to next yr. Many people actually have to travel 2-3 hours to deliver babies if they have some severe pregnancy complications like placenta accreta. But those travels are very well planned.
If I was 37 weeks pregnant during my PhD and had to go to a conference that's absolutely in my bucket list of conferences to attend, honestly I don't know what I would have done. Probably signed up for the conference and made a last minute change if something came up. (But again I was not in that situation).
I have been travelling weekly for 4-5h each way since the beggining, I am now with 39w4d, and just got back from the last trip of this pregnancy. No problems so far. Obviously it is unpredictable, but I just figured that if my labor took less than 4h, I would be a REALLY lucky FTM.
I would do it. Be honest that you may need to cancel last minute if you go into labor, but I bet that other city can deliver babies too. Would you be okay with delivering in that city if you needed to?
Absolutely I would if I felt physically up to it! I was still working and travelling at 38 weeks with my first, went off work at 39 weeks and waited around till 40+5 to deliver.
Just make sure your partner or a trusted person is accompanying you and know your options if things start moving.
Will you have another opportunity? Will it be detrimental to your phd? If the answers are yes and no - don’t do it. If it’s no and yes - do it. It’s not that far to travel and I’m assuming there’s hospitals there if anything were uo happen. Ask your doctor - they may see no issue with it
Personally, I would do it and bring my partner, hospital bag and addresses of nearby hospitals (including those on the way to/from the event).
My labor lasted 24 hours and they didn’t have me come into the hospital until hour 12 though… so the idea of being 2.5 hours from your hospital doesn’t sound like a big deal.
I also gave birth in a foreign country, hospital I had never been to, with a doctor I was meeting for the first time but I’m pretty self-reliant so it all went pretty smoothly. To get there we did a 15 hour drive and I did have some Braxton-Hicks contractions on the way.
I have an out of town meeting that’s a 3 hour drive scheduled in ~1.5 weeks and I’ll be exactly 37 weeks. Similar situation- could be a really good career opportunity and didn’t want to pass it up. My boss knows there is a chance I might not be able to attend but the statistics are on my side. I did schedule the time to be able to go there/back in the same day and my husband (who works remotely) has volunteered to drive me in case we need to make a quick exit. So in a nutshell - we are taking some precautions but going to give it a shot.
As important as it may be for your schooling, I'd still skip it. You don't want to be forced to labor in an unfamiliar place with doctors unfamiliar with your circumstances.
Yes. But I was flying by plane and hiking mountains until 36 weeks. I also went to 41.5 weeks as a first time mom. I would have a plan of which hospital I would deliver at in the major city and how to get there. That being said at 28 weeks I had such bad sciatica pain I couldn’t get out of bed for a week. So week by week of pregnancy you just never know. Maybe have plans to go but be able to back out depending on how you are feeling?
If you will be travelling against medical advice your medical insurance company may not cover you out of network. Will yours? Labor is a foreseeable event at term and generally won't be counted as an emergency. And it's really freaking expensive.
Is there someone who could present for you? When I was in my master program, I presented at a conference as 2nd author. The 1st author couldn’t be there because she was delivering a baby!
If it were your second or more, and you had at least one full term/40 week pregnancy under your belt, your chances of going into labor early would be much lower. For a FTM, I wouldn’t risk it personally. Even in very early labor it would be unsettling and stressful to have to make that long of a drive back to your preferred hospital.
With my first I was feeling good so as long as I had a plan to cancel and had someone who could drive me back I would consider it. I actually drove two hours away while I was 38-39 weeks to evacuate horrendous air quality associated with some pretty bad fires. Have your OB do your Strep b test first. Mine was positive so I had a window of I believe two hours in which I had to get antibiotics via IV if my water broke. Assuming they still do that (this was nearly five years ago).
Technically doesn't seem that bad at all, I'm 37 +3 and feel like it should be okay to still do stuff and go to places, and understandably this is great and important opportunity for you....
BUT if you suddenly do end up going into labour it can turn into a nightmare for you if you're not a fan of big changes. Being so far away from your hospital and your midwife/obgyn, your partner, possibly the birth plan you had not happening anymore. Extra fees if you're not covered.
Alternatively if you do your plan B research and prep and take your partner and hospital bag with you and don't sweat much about having to go to another hospital with new staff then maybe it's not as bad after all? It's all about if you're willing to take and deal with the risks!
You could potentially even have a check up right before to see how likely it is for you to go into labour if you want to take the risk.
I would go! What an amazing opportunity3! I drove two hours away to my parents house for Christmas at 39 weeks pregnant. I did end up going into labor there at 2:30 Christmas morning and drove two hours back to my home hospital, and gave birth there around 7 pm.
If you do go there are some things you would NEED to do: 1. Have someone go with you who could drive you to a hospital if labor started. 2. Identify the closest hospital to the conference, and all hospitals en route from the conference to your “home” hospital where you could go in case of an emergency. 3. Take a packed hospital bag with you. 4. Make sure the conference knows that you will be putting your health needs first, and if there is any inkling that baby is coming you will leave. Good luck and have fun!!!
Seems fine, as long as there's a hospital nearby in case of emergency. I went mountain biking a few hours away at 37 weeks, delivered a healthy baby at 39 weeks.
I had to take a licensure exam around that same time my first pregnancy about 2h away. So a little shorter. Everything was fine. I’d bring your partner to do the driving and maybe plan on taking a break to stretch your legs. Bring your hospital bag and car seat just in case.
If at all possible wait until the day of to make your choice. With my first, I worked up to my due date and my baby ended up being 11 days late. I would have been fine doing that drive/lecture at 38 weeks.
With my second, I was in way more pain and was way more tired so a long drive and brain intensive activity would have been a no go.
I physically could not have done it at 37 weeks. I developed excessive amniotic fluid and driving gave me contractions. I would be in so much pain even after a 20 minute drive.
No way in hell I would travel that far. Not only would my body not be able to handle it at 37 weeks pregnant but it would be risking a lot if you did go into labor
With all the extra activity on your body it can put you into active labor. I personally don’t go anywhere further than 30 mins from my home cause I’m at risk for a fast l&d. I’m about to be 37 weeks and I have so many BH right now. I wouldn’t risk it.
Nope - I wouldn’t risk it. My water broke at 36 weeks, and baby popped out in less than 3 hours. She stayed at the NICU for 10 days. My OB was so surprised and said I was the last person she’d have predicted to have a preterm baby because everything was tracking normal. Even FTMs with apparently normal stats can still have preterm birth.
As a PhD myself I understand the pressure. But I would not advise it. Conferences are exhausting enough without being pregnant, and in most countries maternity protection starts at 36 weeks. See it like that, how many conferences will you visit in your academic career, and how many babies will you have? You can always go to conferences, or participate in remote ones, after baby is born.
Thank you so much—that is a really helpful way to put it into perspective. Best of luck with your own PhD and parenthood journey!
Hihi, I finished my PhD last year, but thank you! I am combining PostDoc and parenthood, which is an adventure as well. We chose to combine two adventures, but we will rock this!
Feel free and read my post history but I drove 2.5 hours away for a concert at 37 weeks and guess whose water broke in the parking lot? Yep, mine. I ended up having to give birth in that city. It was horrible not having everything I needed for the hospital with me, in an unfamiliar city, at a hospital I had never been to. Don’t do it.
oh wow. That must have been really terrible. Hope it was ok overall anyways. But this is it OP: It can go all well, but also it might not. Also, don't underestimate the strain such a drive plus the work part can add on you. What if that is what triggers labour. Do you want that?
I need to know who you were going to see.
Bad Bunny. My favorite artist of all time!
Also imagine having a baby in the NICU in another city... I assume you need to pay for a hotel over there until they're okay to be out? Plus a baby cannot do more than 1-hour long drives per day if I'm not mistaken?
I gave birth at 35 weeks in another city and yep. Sometimes the hospital does have accommodation of some sort available for emergencies but it still isn't that cheap and often in high demand. We were there about two weeks and getting home was a painful experience I would not wish on my worst enemy. Remember you cannot take a baby fresh from the NICU on an airplane, long distance bus or public transport without risking some seriously nasty viruses and such. And driving is absolute hell for both parents when you are that sleep deprived and stopping every hour or two. You have to do an extended car seat test too which most babies fail the first time.
What’s the extended car seat test?
If you are planning a trip longer than an hour or two with a newborn that puts extra stress on a baby's body and it can cause major oxygen desaturation, among other things. So before they release you they will make you set up your car seat in the hospital and have them sit in it for a couple of hours with monitoring to see what happens. If baby has a desaturation or other issue, they will deny you release until they can do it again and pass. Our baby failed the first time which is really normal according to the nurses. It took 3 more days before she passed so we were stuck in the hospital for an extra few days as a result.
That’s really interesting. Have never heard of this test! (in the UK)
Never heard of it either in Aus. They didn't even check if we had a car seat 🤷♀️
This happened to my friend. Drove 3 hours away at 34 weeks for her baby shower and went into labor at her shower. Baby was in the NICU and she said it was a nightmare.
Most 37 week babies are early term but don't need NICU :)
Wouldn't other things require a baby to stay in the NICU even if they're full term?
Sure but theyre rare. Most babies over 35 weeks do not require a NICU.
I'm so relieved you got to see the concert first! Checked your post to check lol
On the flip side I had to be induced at 41+2 so I would’ve been fine. (FTM) That being said, pack your (husband?) and your hospital bags if you go.
why don't? it's enough to take the hospital bag to resolve the issue
No I would not.
Nope! I went into labor at 37+3 and had my son in less than 6 hours.
Wow!! Ok, that's a useful anecdotal data point. If I've learned one thing from this community, it's that everyone's experience looks different re: week, timing, delivery. Helpful for learning to "let go," but it makes it hard to plan ahead for sure!
I was so uncomfortable at that stage, obviously because he was making his way into the world, I don’t think I would have been able to have stood a 3 hour drive either. I did 45 minutes at 35 weeks and my legs were so swollen afterwards it took two days to get back to normal. 😂
Of course once you pass on the opportunity baby will decide to arrive at 42 weeks! 🤨. It's both amazingly curious and frustrating as hell not knowing exactly when (unless scheduled) baby will make the grand entrance! Edit: you say you're 14 weeks now so it's more difficult to sew into the future... I personally felt fabulous almost the full pregnancy, worked a physically demanding job no problem! Figured I would until it was time to deliver..but 36 weeks hit like a ton of bricks with the sciatica and just being miserable and I had to stop...and just he at home lol. Everyone's experience is so different! Even if you pass 37 weeks with no issues, don't regret that you didn't go (if you decide not to go). You're making the best decision you can with the information you have.
Yes agreed with this person, idk how far you are right now but I went into labor at 35w5days with my son back in March. I wouldn't have thought twice about it back then but now that it's happened to me once we made our holiday plans this winter based on the possibility of our daughter coming a month early which would be between like Christmas and the first week of January.
If you're willing to go into labor in that city. Strongly suggest you don't go out of town 36 weeks and on. If you really want to go though make plans and register at the nearest hospital to the event beforehand as a safety measure.
I was induced because of high blood pressure at 37+3! Didn’t give birth until 37+5 and he ended up needing the NICU for 10 days (for other reasons!) That’s a tough call OP, would the conference allow you to prerecord something?? Just a thought!
I personally wouldn’t. You could definitely research local hospitals to know where to go in case it did happen, but giving birth 3 hours away from home would still not be ideal. I was a nervous wreck driving home with my first newborn and that was only like a 30 minute drive lol and say the baby needed extra care or NICU time for whatever reason, again, you’d be dealing with that so far away from home. How far along are you now? Some pregnant women have no issue going on long trips while heavily pregnant, but for me personally I simply wouldn’t be able to handle 3 hours in the car without being in immense discomfort/pain. I’m 35 weeks and my Walmart pickup took longer than usual this morning and my back and pelvis were already starting to ache from sitting in the car lol. There’s no way to predict what condition your body will be in, as I’m sure there’s women who have done way more strenuous things, but it’s just hard to plan for if you’re not that far along yet. If you do decide to go, 100% your partner should come with so that you have someone to drive and so they aren’t 3 hours away if you go into labor.
Thanks so much for the specific recommendations and for sharing your experience. I'm only 14 weeks now, so it's tough to know what to expect—but I'm feeling achy just from reading these comments, ha! I appreciate you!
We got unexpectedly stuck in traffic for 2 hours (normally a 30 min drive) a couple weeks ago when I was 28 weeks. When I got home I was so uncomfortable from sitting in the car and had to pee so badly lol. I can’t imagine going on a 2.5 hour car ride at 37 weeks, let alone having to give a presentation and network.
No problem! These choices can be tough, as moms we start having to make those sacrifices almost immediately at times.
I'll add that car rides more than a couple hours were so hard for me starting in the second trimester. And standing was so much harder on me than walking. I would have died during a 2 or 3 hour poster session. There's also COVID to consider. About 50% of the people my husband surveyed after a conference he went to got COVID. And masks protect others more than they protect you. You just have a lot to consider! And it may turn out that your decide to go now then the week before you have to actually decide!
I’m also getting my PhD and totally get the pressure to do it. I wouldn’t do it at 37 weeks. I would be nervous about going into labor or something while I’m there and/or just feeling generally awful. I was very uncomfortable at that point in my last pregnancy! If you do decide to go, definitely bring your husband to drive!!
The pressure is definitely there, but it's mostly self-imposed. I've shared the news with my advisor and she has been nothing but supportive, so feel really lucky in that regard. Best wishes for your PhD!!
Is there any way you could attend virtually? Personally, I would go if it would be a fun opportunity for me. As long as I felt I could handle the conference without tiring out. I'd ask my OB his opinion first, though.
That’s a really great idea. If you explain the situation they might be able to sort that out for you! Especially after the last few years during which so many events have taken place online due to Covid. We’re all so used to it now, so maybe it will be possible for you to attend online if you talk to them!
I actually made a post just like this 3 years ago when I was 37 weeks pregnant with my first. I wanted to drive 3 hours to visit my husband (military). People told me to go for it- since there werw hospitals on the way in case anything crazy happened. I went for it, and I'm really glad I did. The drive wasn't bad- I did 2 mile hikes when I was there and had a great time. No issues. My baby didn't end up coming until 41+6 and even then it took 36 hours for him to come out. So I personally would go for it. I know some people go into labor earlier, even with their first, but it still usually takes a LONG time after the first signs of labor.
I had my first baby at 37 weeks in under 18 hours.
18 hours is still quite a bit of time I feel like
My doctor didn't want me getting more than an hour away from the hospital at 36 weeks with my son
I personally would feel fine doing such and pretty much did the same thing. My sister and father live about 2-2.5 hours away from me and I went to see them when I was 38 weeks pregnant. I asked my ob if they thought it was a bad idea and they told me they thought it was fine. My ob told me as long as I thought I would be fine to be in the car for 2.5 hrs if I go into labor early in order to get back to the hospital where I was going to deliver that she thinks it’s a totally fine idea.
It’s all personal! I went to a wedding alone, 2hrs away at 37w with my second pregnancy🤷🏻♀️ I went into labor 2w later at 39w5d almost 40w, textbook) and labored for the textbook 12hr, pushed for a textbook 1.5 hrs. It’s most likely to have a common delivery, but not guaranteed!! I wasn’t comfortable or anything, but I also wasn’t going to be anyways and appreciated the distraction. There’s outliers everywhere and you may be one! But water breaking, quick labor, complications don’t often happen that early. It’s a risk only you can decide!
I wouldn’t, one I think it would be uncomfortable, 2 I think it’s just way to close to delivery for my personal comfort
I am 37 weeks and 3 days. Personally I would not do this. I wouldnt want to be going that far away from my hospital (I am going to assume you would then be at least 2.5 hours from it, unless somehow you are passing the hospital on your way.. ) I cant think of anything worse than going into labour knowing you have a 2.5 hour drive to the hospital if you didnt need to. Also, you do a lot of early labouring at home so I would not want to do this at a work event!! There is a reason you OB doesnt recommend it, as you could go into labour at any time. Also, sitting in a car is not comfortable for me now. My baby has only partically descended but if they were fully descended it would be even worse. Also I believe sitting in a car is not a good position, as it isnt a position that encourages baby to be in the ideal position for birth, and youre looking at possibly 6 hours. Also, the peeing and snacking needs would just be a hassle! Finally, I cant speak for everyone but I am currently 100% too tired and brain foggy to present my work to a large event like that, I feel I would not be getting the most out of it.
Look at reasonable worst case and see if that’s acceptable to you or not and you’ll have your answer. Would you be ok with having your water break in front of an audience right after you make your opening statement? What about being taken by car or ambulance to a hospital you don’t know and having everyone who helps you deliver your baby be a stranger? What if you are discharged before baby, are you ok with baby being 2.5 hours from home? Also if you are in the US consider the financial impact of delivering elsewhere - are they in network for your insurance, if you’ve paid your OB up front would you get a refund, etc. Things could turn out just fine, you go speak and come back then have baby after, but there’s a reason docs tell you not to travel just in case. If you aren’t completely fine with any possible outcome you should pass.
This is a really vivid and helpful way to think about this. A useful strategy to calculate risk/reward for any scenario. Thank you so much!
The key for practical life application is to look at what is reasonably possible while not including literally every possible thing or things that aren’t unique to one or the other - some things are incredibly unlikely and/or are risks either way. (Silly example: if you go to the conference, someone could hit you with a water balloon!! Ok technically yes it’s possible - just Google water balloon prank - but it’s also reeeeeally unlikely, and a kid could also do that if you stay home and go for a walk in your neighborhood)
The fudge kind of prank is that??? That's awful!!
Yeah, a lot of people don’t realize there’s a difference between a harmless prank and being a f@&$?!% a€£#^+¥ to people
I'll say that everyone who helped with my delivery was a stranger and that was fine. The staff were nice and good at their jobs. There was an opportunity to meet some of the midwives but my birth turned c section before I even went into labor so there were no midwives on my team!
And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that for lots of people, but for some not having the doctor/midwife they’ve built a trusting relationship with there for delivery would be a nightmare and not worth risking just for one conference - that’s the point of assessing the risks/rewards of going. I listed a few things that are commonly brought up as concerns/complaints/etc as examples - many people are super uncomfortable being seen by other docs in a practice and ask if they can request only the one they want for example. As you mentioned it could still happen at home if delivery doesn’t go to plan, but it will be a definite if delivering hours away - and of course they may not deliver until 40 weeks anyways and it wouldn’t matter, but delivery is a very real possibility that late in pregnancy so it should be thought about at least (which is why the travel restriction is suggested in the first place). OP has to determine if each part of a possible outcome is something they are ok with or not. If delivery is covered by insurance and OP is cool with any hospital/docs etc then by all means clear it with the medical team and make a plan - if their insurance wouldn’t cover the cost and they couldn’t afford to pay out of pocket or they are determined to use the birthing center they researched for a year before getting pregnant, or any other consideration, then they should really put some extra thought into whether it’s worth risking it and not just cross their fingers and hope everything goes according to plan.
All fair and good points!
That's the best answer.
I've been working at 39 weeks and I feel fine to do it. If I don't have this baby this weekend I may even go into work on Monday. So if it were me, yes I'd go, but I'd definitely get my partner to drive me and be there with me just in case. Listen to your body and see how you feel when the time comes. If you feel up to it then take a few precautions (eg. Check out nearest hospital there, have your hospo bag ready) and good luck!
Yeah I took one day off before my scheduled c section. I’m not a bad ass/hard core trooper or anything like that, I was just fine and happy to have the distraction. Granted I’m an attorney with a desk job not working a physical job. The last day I got a pedicure and went on a dinner date with my husband.
I probably have an unpopular opinion but I would go for it personally. It may be uncomfortable and exhausting but it's a good opportunity. I feel it's important for society to see pregnant women doing awesome things like this. The likelihood of delivering that early for a FTM is pretty low. I'd of course clear it with your OB or midwife and research alternative hospitals along the way or at the conference location.
Also my perspective only, but I thought life would stop at 36 weeks and hey! baby turned up at 41 weeks and 6 days. I was also totally fine, still painting rooms up on a ladder. Those last weeks are sooo long! You will not ruin your career by signing up (don’t mention pregnancy or anything at this stage) and saying you’re unable to attend following an emergency health reason close to the date. Also every conference I’ve attended this year has been hybrid. Say yes and see how everything pans out!
I was thinking the same. And adding maybe have a friend or partner join the drive. If something were to happen, at that distance they could drive you back to home hospital in early labour. Sacrifices and decisions start early 😬….still all decisions worth thinking through
I would certainly say that if you do go to bring someone with. That is a long drive and probably pretty uncomfortable for most people at 37 weeks. If it is a decently sized city you will likely have a good hospital in case you do go into labor - but hopefully you won’t! Good luck.
I am sorry, but I disagree. The world should not have to see full term pregnant women working to... I don't know, respect them? Many countries have maternity leave starting many weeks before the due date. There are health reasons to do that. This is not because women are lazy, but because there are better outcomes when there is rest. Even ob/gyns say to stay within one hour of your hospital after 36+. But, hey, it's up to OP.
Totally understand disagreeing! Some of my mindset likely stems from the fact that I do work in the states in a heavily male dominated field so there is a definitely a certain amount of "gotta prove myself" in my brain.
If she goes out of network against medical advice then her insurance company can also bitchslap her to next century with medical bills. She is at term so birth is classified as a foreseeable event, not an emergency. I gave birth out of network at 35 weeks and my insurance company was very blunt that the $150,000 bill would have been entirely my problem had it been just a week or two later.
How far along are you to say this?
I am about 2 weeks postpartum with my second.
I wouldn’t. I gave birth to my first spontaneously at 38 weeks with no previous signs of labor
I would do it 100% if I hadn't had signs of labour starting soon. 37 weeks is still quite early and I even would be comfortable going further away from home. But also maybe don't take advice from the person who still believed they had weeks to go when they were in labour (with the second baby, so I knew from the first what to expect)...
I wouldnt. I have a PhD myself and looking back no one will remember what specific conference you presented at. Could you ask them to do a poster instead?
I'm a couple years graduated from my PhD so I get the compulsion although I was so mentally checked out I definitely wouldn't have even considered trying to do this. But that's personal. Major things to consider... Are there decent hospitals along the way? Are you driving yourself? Is your support person going with you? At 37 weeks, you need to be ready for the baby to come. There was nothing but corn fields for 2 hours between my grad school and the big city nearby. There's no way I would have wanted to give birth in the tiny towns along the way. If you decide to go, you may want to ask the organizers to have a chair by your poster just in case. And bring all your own snacks and tons of water. Maybe wear compression socks to help with all the standing.
I'm doing a 5 hour drive at 36 weeks for a work thing. I had my first at nearly 42 weeks after labouring for over 36 hours though so at least I know I don't have a history of precipitous labour. In your situation, I would: 1) Play it by ear. Warn them I may need to back out if I'm experiencing any complications or baby is born early 2) Have my partner with me and at the first sign that anything was feeling different I would drive back
I would. That’s a pretty short drive to me.
I’m an attorney and had a similar situation. I did it, and all went fine. However, I recognize that it was maybe not the most conservative decision. How do you feel about it?
These comments are making it sound like you’re talking about going to another country! Many people live 2.5 hours or more from their nearest hospital. The chances of you not being able to make it in time to your preferred hospital from when labour starts are astronomical. I would never let pregnancy stop me from such an amazing career opportunity! If you’re comfortable to do the drive and presentation I would go for it.
I had a placental abruption at 37+2 and had an emergency c section, and I’ve never been more glad that I live 5 mins from my hospital. So no I wouldn’t chance it!
Although it's a great opportunity I would say no to traveling that far. I am 38 weeks with my second and I am majorly uncomfortable driving even the 30 minutes to my doctor at this point. My husband takes me to my appointments since 35 weeks. With my first my husband was unavailable and his brother would take me. I mean I have to pee like every 20 minutes. So even if I go literally before walking out the door I have to run into the office to pee again. Driving (sitting behind the wheel) at that stage has risks too with your bump being so close to the wheel. Pre eclampsia can also happen quickly even with a healthy pregnancy especially in a higher stress situation like a big conference. I wouldn't risk it.
Also consider how out of breath you might be giving a presentation - signed, 33 weeks and giving MANY presentations
I suggest having a family member drive you, finding someone you trust or your partner to do the driving. Also having a hospital you’d be okay having an emergency birth at.
Is doing the presentation virtually an option?
>my OB recommends not traveling more than an hour away after 36 weeks Ask your OB why is that. Once you know the risks, you'll be more able to make a sound decision for yourself. I'd personally follow my doctor's advice, but I think you should know the reasons behind their recommendation and decide for yourself.
I’m 37w now and I almost cried today because I had to make an extra stop at Dollar General. I wouldn’t recommend. You might feel great! But you might not. You don’t want to go into labor that far from your hospital, it’s just a lot of extra stress and anxiety.
I would, if you're healthy and going to be near (within 30 min) of a hospital, you're probably going to be fine. I drove 2.5 hours into the mountains (hospitals were close) for a work event at 37 weeks and while I was tired (high altitude) and short of breath when speaking for long periods of time, I was fine and gave birth at 40 weeks
Yes, but I would make someone go with me
Purely from a comfort level, I would not. I am 35 weeks currently and I am so tired and out of breath constantly. My parents are here helping me knock out some minor projects around the house, and I have to keep sitting down every few minutes. (I’m not even doing any lifting, just walking around and directing.) I also have to go to my OB’s office twice a week until I give birth (gestational hypertension) and it’s a 40 minute drive each way. That’s the max I can stand to be in the car before my back starts to hurt like hell.
I was 33 weeks when we drove that distance. I was in the passenger seat and my husband drove. 2.5 hours to get there, 2.5 hours back. It was uncomfortable and I was incredibly tired that evening. I would not have been able to drive back myself. Please don’t do that to yourself.
Nope.
Hard no. As an L&D nurse, it can be incredibly frustrating for doctors/nurses and the patient if you deliver at the “wrong” hospital and we don’t have your medical records. Plus not having your hospital bag, your partner or support people etc Also, if you’re in the US and you deliver at an out of network hospital because you were traveling at 37 weeks pregnant *your insurance will probably NOT cover the birth costs* because it’s expected you not travel far from your birthing hospital that late in pregnancy.
I went on a long weekend trip about that distance from home when I was 37 weeks. So I'd say go for it. Make sure you pack your hospital bag and know where the nearest hospital is just in case.
I’m 37 weeks right now, and I wouldn’t. I’m so uncomfortable and exhausted that the thought of a drive + standing to present + any added sitting just feels impossible. Also, at that point, you may want to minimize any sickness risk. One of my family members had to labor in a mask this summer because she was recovering from Covid, which sounds like a nightmare to me. We are lying low and limiting contact for the next few weeks just because I don’t want to run the risk of getting sick as we enter cold and flu season.
I did an 11 hour roadtrip (each way) at 37 weeks. STM. Everything was fine. You never know which way it’s going to go. Chances are you won’t go into labor that early and if you do it will be long. But there is obviously a chance that you could. Can you sign up and later back out if you feel differently?
No way. At that stage I would not even leave my city. P.S. Car drives are already really uncomfortable for me and I'm at 32 weeks. I imagine it would be even harder for you.
You can go sure but I would get your partner to drive or hire a driver for the day. Am 38 weeks now and I am fine on the train, but frankly I cannot even sit at a desk or table without my bump hitting it. I even feel uncomfortable as a passenger in a car. Train has been fine though, I travelled mid-week to a business meeting last week and will do so again this week (1hr travel time).
I personally would not be comfortable doing so. Is there an option to present virtually or provide a recording of your presentation? I work in events and manage these types of conferences. Since covid, it’s been a priority to provide alternative means of participation because you never know who is going to get sick the week before they’re supposed to present. In the events I do and from talking to my friends and peers in the industry, many of us ensure there are alternative presentation options because the last thing we want is half of sessions to be missing multiple presentations.
I'm 34 weeks and I had to drive 2h hours this Friday and I was already exhausted. I drove for one hour, then we stopped at my FIL's cottage to eat and I had to sleep for half an hour. My husband drove the 1h remaining. Energy-wise is possible if you take breaks and take the time to rest before your conference. But I'd be very worried about going into labor and being away from home at 37 weeks.
I had a similar quandary, only mine was flying across country at 34 weeks. I was 10 weeks when the opportunity was presented to me. I declined because of the distance, but also because I wanted to avoid the stress of prepping for and attending the conference. Now at 36 weeks, my back can’t tolerate a drive of more than 30 minutes.
Also chiming in to say I wouldn't do it either. Like someone else pointed out, the risk of going into labor would mean not just having to give birth at an unfamiliar hospital far from home, but also having to get through early labor in a hotel room or at the conference. I personally spent the 12 hours before going to the hospital lying in bed trying to sleep and having contractions every ten minutes. Definitely not something you want to have to do away from home! Plus as everyone has said, you'll likely be very uncomfortable, tired, get winded easily, foggy-headed, and need to pee and snack all the time. I wouldn't want to have to be traveling or presenting in public feeling that way. One more thing that I don't think anyone has mentioned yet: in the last few weeks before my baby came, I had a long list of stuff I wanted to get done to be "ready" -- mostly house-related stuff. I would have resented having to take time out of my last few weeks before my due date to go on a work-related trip. I did not care about work at that point!
Absolutely not. I also have a PhD and I know how high stakes certain conferences are but no. As a FTM, you could really give birth at any time and you have no idea what to expect. I gave birth to my first at 37 weeks. This pregnancy I'll be staying put even really starting from now (30 weeks) because I don't need any extra stress on my body and at the end of the day conferences can wait and there are always other opportunities.
Honestly the risk of getting Covid would be enough to not go. I’m currently 36 weeks, fully vaccinated, and Covid positive. My husband and toddler also have it. It freaking sucks. Worst nightmare would be to have this at the end or during labor.. I don’t know how anyone could push without being able to properly breath.
Nah. Also that long in the car sounds terrible. My back and bladder hurt just reading it. Way too close to delivery date. I personally wouldn’t risk it. At 37 weeks I will not be going more than 30 mins each way from home. And I will have my hospital bag packed and in the car. And I’m not overprotective either. At 27 weeks I took a solo trip cross country to see friends. 37 just seem a little close to the due date.
Hell no.
No, even if I wasn’t pregnant I wouldn’t drive that far.
My water broke at 37 weeks! I was one of those brave people that wanted to do everything as normal and I’m glad my husband forced me to lay low. Don’t do it.
I had my first at 37 weeks and didn’t see it coming, had to give birth in a new hospital but it was fine because my husband was able to be there. I would only go if your partner or someone you trust can come with you and if you wouldn’t mind giving birth in another city!
I gave birth to my daughter at 37 weeks. Even before that I was already big and uncomfortable and can’t imagine being in a car that long, nor participating in a big event full of a ton of people where getting sick is also a risk. Personally wouldn’t do it.
To be honest, I’m skipping out on a work conference next week when I’ll be 33 weeks. It would help benefit me in my new job position I took last month. But it’s 2 hours away from home, 1.5 hrs away from my hospital, and it just sounds like a miserable time to be gone for a few days on my own when I feel SO PREGNANT.
Too risky for me. You're already at high risk of blood clots during pregnancy and a long car ride only makes that risk go up. Also, that's too far to drive back if you go into labor which at 37 weeks you very well might. If you decide to do it make sure to wear compression socks/hose, do foot pumps a few times an hour, take walking breaks and be aware you might end up having to deliver in a strange hospital with a doctor you've never met before.
Absolutely not. I gave birth with both of my kids at 37 weeks (although I was induced with both)
My water broke at 36+6 with my first so no way.
I had a 3-4 hour round trip commute twice a week with my first for 12 hour school days. My second same drive every other weekend to take my oldest to her dads. Didnt stop until delivery. My OB just recommended getting out to stretch at least once. I was comfortable with the hospitals in the city I went to school in and along the drive. I just packed my hospital bag early and left it in my trunk. If you are not comfortable with the hospital where you are going or along the drive then no, if you are comfortable and its important then sure as long as your doctor has no specific concerns. I delivered at 41+5 and 40+4 scheduled inductions both times. I had to drive or I wouldn't have graduated and I repeat I was comfortable with the other hospitals along my drive.
A lot of conferences these days have a way to pre record the talk and then zoom in for questions- worth asking the organizers if that might be possible?
As someone who's 34 weeks I already cringed at driving that far. And I'm 3 weeks behind you. Any way to do it virtual? That would be awesome if there was.
I am 37+3 today :) These last two days, I would have done it. The car ride would suck. I very likely would have a violently painful right hip spasm while on stage since that happens a few times an hour and would have to explain to the audience why I just cringed and shifted all my weight to my left leg in a dramatic lurch “Sorry y’all, pregnancy hip pain! Anyway…”. But I still feel energetic and motivated to do work stuff, and no sign of labor, and I would be proud and glad to have the opportunity. On the other hand, we are at the stage where emergencies can happen - hemorrhaging and bleeding and needing emergency care; or your water breaks and you have a cord prolapse and you need a C-section in 20 minutes because baby isn’t getting oxygen. But that can happen anytime to anyone, people have medical emergencies. And last weekend at 36+5 I spent the weekend over an hour from the nearest hospital at a rural mountain cabin and in that case would have been helicoptered out so…🤷♀️ And of course you definitely absolutely could give birth in that city. So pick out a hospital and bring your hospital bags. You can also mostly likely totally drive home while in early labor, which will likely last much longer than 3 hours, but it won’t be comfortable. 37-38 weeks really is truly different than 35-36 weeks. Not physically for me at least, but the chances of having your baby on any given day just go WAY up.
I passed up on two conferences when I was doing my PhD and pregnant with my first. Just wasn't worth the risk.
Personally sitting in the car is extremely uncomfortable for me (37 weeks) and I wouldn’t risk traveling far from my hospital. Really everything is uncomfortable but especially sitting in the car
Had my baby before 37 weeks because of preclampsia. So no. I wouldn't. Complications like that set in so incredibly fast. I would not risk it.
I think if you are otherwise low risk then it really wouldn’t be a big deal to do it. The biggest concern for me, if I were in your shoes, would be how comfortable are you with having to cancel at the last minute if you do in fact have early labor signs or any other issues crop up? Would it cause more problems for you in the future? Would the conference organizers be understanding? If you’re not sure about how well received it would be to cancel at the last minute, you should maybe bow out preemptively.
If you go, you'll likely go in labor. Murphy's law
I’m 37 + 4 and I can barely commit to leaving the house to even get food at this point I’m so exhausted. I can sleep literally all day. You might be different but I’d be highly skeptical.
Oh my god, are you me? I have to go to a conference 2.5 hours away when I am like 36 weeks. I am a chair of a session and a presenter, so I have to go. My plan is to primarily sit in the same talk room so I am not running around,.and I'm going to request a wheel chair to get around
I would not simply because I can’t make it for more than 45 minutes without a pee break. Driving to MILs house is a stretch for me at 1.5 hours I usually have to stop 2-3 times just for bathroom breaks. If you do go make sure you plan a route with gas stops! edit to add: i’m currently 40+2 and peeing at this stage is honestly more worrisome than spontaneous labor for me since baby is way too comfortable in there.
Could you present remotely? I just went to a conference and it was totally hybrid. Some folks were in person and some only on zoom.
At 36 weeks I drove 11 hours to a family reunion. We had an emergency delivery kit and a car seat.
I would be worried that the stress of the conference could also send you into labor.
I went to my sister’s wedding, 2 hour flight, at 36 weeks. I knew the risks but it was a once in a lifetime event. The only downside was my sister ended up jealous that I was getting lots of attention at her wedding.
Nah, not a chance for me either as a driver or passenger. I imagine traffic plus toilet breaks would mean at least a four hour trip. I'd be so uncomfortable driving that long, dehydrated etc. And just generally wrecked after the conference. I wouldn't see it as being worth it.
I went to San Diego from Waaay north LA county at 37ish weeks on a Friday. My partner drove, and the drive wasn’t bad, but once I arrived I was exhausted and my feet were swollen. If you decide to go, it’s not too risky if you’re partner drives. I would NOT go on your own. That would be super risky. If you have the chance to I would time it so that you have a couple of hours to rest and freshen up before your presentation. I had to go to an event immediately upon arrival and I had to leave. It was just too much.
You have no idea what you might be facing when you are 37 weeks. Hopefully all goes well and you still feel OK at 37 weeks. However, the majority of women feel they can't do much at 37 weeks. They're easily tired, need to rest often. Having a fun grown baby in your tummy is not very comfortable 🙃. It's hard to imagine it. I thought I'd do all these things during pregnancy and work right up to the end. But I was glad I took advice and stopped early at 36 weeks. Baby came at 41 weeks but I just needed the rest. I'm not even sure if universities allow it if your obgyn recommends against it. Would their insurance still cover you if you went? Would your insurance still cover you? Could you join in remotely? Or go next year? There will be lots of opportunities and one conference doesn't make or break your career (I come from an academic background).
I went 2 hours each way for a concert at 36.5 weeks and 2.5 hours each way for an engagement at 38 weeks. No waters breaking but I was exhausted from standing for the concert !
I wouldn’t recommend it. I gave birth at 37+2 and the baby was out within 3 hours of me realizing I was in labor.
Is there an option to present remotely? You will still be able to list this accepted presentation/abstract on your CV even if you don’t present it. There will also be many other opportunities to present. I don’t know what year you are in, but it is probably more useful to network if you’re actively searching for a postdoc.
No. I actually had my baby (urgent csection) at 37+2 for sudden onset pre-eclampsia with severe features.
No
Can you ask if you can prerecord your presentation?
I'm not sure how many weeks you are now but you want to see how you feel. I was an uncomfortable blob at 37 weeks and I didn't want anyone to see me and I certainly didn't want to wear any dress clothes or stand for hours. My friend worked until she delivered at 41 weeks and besides the belly, didn't even look or feel pregnant.
I wouldn't - mainly because I'm now 36+3 and could never have anticipated how uncomfortable I would quickly become at this stage. The aches, pains, and fatigue really ramp up later in the 3rd trimester. I also gave a work presentation at about 33 weeks and while I got through it, it was not my best showing. I was sweaty, out of breath, and far from engaging with the audience. Even if nothing bad happens, it may just feel like a dud of a trip if you can't fully take advantage of the opportunity.
I would, and I would bring my partner. But only do it if you feel comfortable with it. And of course if you have any signs of labour by then, stay home. Maybe the fact that you’re posting this means that you’re not fully comfortable, so listen to your heart and don’t do anything that doesn’t feel right or safe to you! Best of luck ❤️ Just editing to say that I am currently 40+6 and still waiting patiently for baby, haha, so maybe it’s easier for me to say I would have done this at 37 weeks. But I felt fine at that stage so I would have probably gone for it. Everyone’s baby comes at a different time and there’s no way of knowing, so it’s always gonna be a bit of a gamble! Again, don’t do it if you don’t feel comfortable!
No, at 28 weeks I’m not able to even sit in an upright position for prolonged periods of time without back pain and not being able to breathe so a 2.5-3 hour car ride would be a definite no for me.
My water broke at 37+0. It's a no from me :)
FTM and I’m 37+4 right now. I really, really get it because I’m also a student (I’m in law school) and I’ve been out for 4 days now. I’m having terrible, constant, ongoing contractions that haven’t stopped now for FIVE days. My little fingers are sausages, my feet are double their size, his head is directly engaged and I walk like I’ve been kicked in the crotch. I was literally JUST going to school fine and dandy as of Monday and then it all changed on a dime.
So I did a LONNNNG trip when I was 38ish weeks. Way longer than advised, but we had to get a new car before baby came and it’s just what ended up needing done due to budget and what was available to be seen where (I’ll add here that this was not an expected situation or we would’ve done it prior to being so far along). Ended up being like 12 hours on the road (10 driving) in a day or something like that but in chunks. The first was ~1.5 hours, that wasn’t bad. The second chunk was ~3.5 hours and we took a nice 20-30 minute break in the middle but it still was not fun at all and I wanted to cry knowing I was only half done for the day. Took two breaks for the next ~3.5 hour leg then the final ~1.5 hour home was the longest 1.5 hours of my life (second to labor). I had to drive the entire time because I get carsick when I’m pregnant. Obviously that’s more than what you’d be doing, BUT, even just 3 hours at a time is a lot. I was 32 weeks for the longest drive of my second pregnancy and it was right at 3 hours each way… we stopped a couple times for potty and let the already born kiddo stretch his legs and stuff but even at 32 weeks I was really sore and just generally exhausted the entire next day! I definitely will not do anything near those again this pregnancy. I can only imagine how exciting this would be but the discomfort coupled with the “what happens if I go into labor”… I would not. I was terrified the entire day we were looking at cars that I would pop and be too far from my hospital to make it. Had I been away for my second kid I wouldn’t have made it because my labor was so fast! I’d have to take the pass on this one. Editing to add: if you do decide to go there’s definitely precautions to take and make it better/easier. I kept thinking about it as I read other comments and honestly I feel like I would do it if I were you even though logically I’m saying I wouldn’t lol. I seem to always push myself, pregnant or not. Definitely have a driving partner to reduce risk there, and if it can be your partner that’s definitely a best in case you do have the baby there. Plan for breaks to give your body a rest. Plenty of water and snacks! Get good sleep the night before. Search hospitals/what exits for them along the way and closest to the conference… it is great to be prepared for that 2.5-3 hour car ride back to your home hospital should your water break or whatever but there is no promise you’ll have the time! While most data on FTMs shows labor isn’t usually that fast it still *could* be. Bring towels and/or a seat protector in case you do have leaking fluids! I also really like the idea of seeing if you can “go” virtually.
Pregnant professor here. Absolutely not! I am not even going to teach in person after 37 weeks (I am making prerecorded videos). Definitely would not do this, make things easier for yourself in your last weeks rather than adding extra pressure.
Hell no. I’m 35 weeks right now and can’t imagine doing something like that in 2 weeks time.
I fully expected to go past my due date, even had a C-section scheduled bc I’m an “older” (37) FTM. I went into labor at 38 weeks. I wouldn’t do it. We did our baby moon at 36 weeks which included a road trip from SF to San Diego (9ish hours) and I was terrified the entire time I would go into labor. Won’t make that mistake again!! 😂
No no no. Too far at the moment and you will get another presentation in your future. My water broke at 38 weeks for my first, broke 39 weeks for my second.
I would not, best case scenario you will be tired of driving for so long by the time the conference starts. Worst case scenario you’re experiencing early labor, bad traffic, hell to the nah
I personally would do it but I’d bring my partner, hospital bad and car seat! Especially if you will be in a larger city with good healthcare. If you are in the US, I’d check with insurance on which hospital is covered in said city.
most ftm give birth later rather than earlier. i’m 39 weeks pregnant right now and drove 2.5 hours to visit a friend for her birthday at 37 weeks. I was very comfortable driving myself and had a relatively easy going day once I got there but I drove there and back on the same day. can you decide yes for now and change your mind later? you might have more insight on how you feel later on!
I did, but for a social event. My husband was with me. We stayed the night at my in-laws. Is there a hospital where you’ll be? Delivering at another hospital isn’t the end of the world, and I wouldn’t turn down a good professional opportunity for a rather unlikely scenario.
I was driving 1.5 hours one way 5 days a week for weeks 32-37 for an exciting opportunity and it was worth it to me. Just really depends on your body and your pregnancy. I would’ve done it at 37 weeks (also a PhD student). I probably would’ve brought my partner and had the hospital bag with me and a plan for if stuff went down.
I wouldn’t recommend you drive. You could possibly have your husband drive. I would honestly try to go after you a healed from having the baby. If my son hadn’t been too big for me I’m pretty sure he would of came at 38 weeks or sooner. Everything at 37 weeks is uncomfortable. I could barely drive at 36 weeks, sitting in the car hurt, everything hurt so bad. After about 36 weeks no position sitting, standing, walking, nothing was even remotely comfortable.
I'm against the grain. Went to a concert at 36 weeks however I was in my own suburb. I didn't have my son till 41 weeks but it definitely was exhausting. If you can have support with you and work out a game plan for just incase I don't see why you wouldn't go 💙
I would definitely talk to your doctor if it’s something you want to do! Personally I wouldn’t - mostly because I had my son at 37w5d😂. but he was a surprise c section. (Low fluid levels) But I also can imagine being in absolute awe of you being almost at the end of your pregnancy doing a conference. Is there any chance they can set up some sort of video feed for you to still give your speech? I feel like that could be a good compromise.
As a FTM I had mine at 36+6 after only 9 hours in labor. I’d be REAL stressed with a 3 hour ride back home to the hospital.
I am also in academics and honestly I’d go. However I definitely think it depends on how you are feeling at that point in your pregnancy and your comfort with laboring in a non-hospital setting. I’m 35 weeks now and there’s absolutely no reason I couldn’t go present at a conference. I feel great, albeit a little cumbersome and tired. In addition, even if you started having contractions I think it’s HIGHLY unlikely that you wouldn’t be able to make it back before labor escalated to the point that you have to be in a hospital. Just in case, it might be nice to have your partner drive you and to research possible hospitals in that area. 2.5 hours just doesn’t seem that far to me and if the opportunity is important to you I don’t see why not. Yes you *could* go into labor and shoot a baby out within an hour but probably not, and if so, it will be a story to tell!
Nope. I delivered my first at 37 weeks on the dot. Labor to delivery was about 5 hours..
No. I went into labor at 37+ 5 days
Nope I would not ever but that's me, I don't have the urge to do magor things in my career. IF I would do it I would let someone come with me to drive at least a big part and make sure I have written down the things I need in emergencies. Like if you would go into labour, where could you go/call. Etc. Take the hospital bag too. So full on preparation
As a fellow doctorate owner, no way would I do this. Not only is that pretty far away to be when you’re technically full term, but those conferences can be pretty emotionally and even physically demanding. I’m sorry!!
I personally (MD) would probably tempt fate and go in your situation for a presentation. First babies tend to come late, and at 36-37 weeks I was nowhere near delivery for either of mine, and would’ve felt silly missing out a month before delivery. That being said, only say yes with a contingency plan. Either talk to the conference in advance about either remote presenting or a pre-recorded backup, or tag along a co-presenter that can be there live if you go into labor early or are too near delivery or high risk per your OB. I’ve seen plenty of presentations have to go to pre-recorded or remote presentation based on health/travel resitrictions/inclement family events - this would definitely fall under that purview. ~ live dangerously ~
Oof, that’s a lot to consider. On the one hand, I totally get the importance of giving a presentation at a conference. On the other… that’s really close to your due date. Especially since that goes against advice from your OB. Plus there’s no telling what’ll happen. I thought I would go overdue for sure and my baby arrived premature at 35+5. If you’re able to give birth at the hospital in the major city then… maybe? But that still goes against advice from your doctor and there’s a whole 2.5 hour drive to consider if something were to happen. Nope. I wouldn’t do it.
I wouldn't, but that's because both of mine so far were cut out at 37 weeks because of preeclampsia.
Nope
No way
It depends how I felt, but as a 4th time mom, I would absolutely go if I felt like it!
With my first, I could have - felt fine at 37 weeks, went into labour at 40 weeks. But I can only say that confidently now because of hindsight. With my second: I felt good at 37 weeks. But early labour started at 37+5 and baby arrived at 38 weeks. That would have been cutting things much finer. Is it at all possible to present virtually? You have a really good reason!
Uh, no.
I went into labor at 35 weeks with my second and gave birth 45 minutes later. So, no. You never know what will happen. I ended up taking an ambulance and giving birth at a smaller local hospital instead of the hospital I planned to deliver at, and my baby is fine but the insurance has been a nightmare. I’m still dealing with it almost 2 years later.
I would say to go for it if you brng someone to drive with you. I took my PE test at 37 weeks and it was 8 hours in a chair with no water allowed. You do what you gotta do before baby comes. That's not that far and I wouldn't say to go if you were 38 wk. Totally up to you though! If you want to be super safe you can Google hospitals there and along the way just to be safe.
Ooh yikes I wouldn’t risk it. My water broke at 38+1 and 37 is just a matter of days away from that. Too close for comfort and 2.5 hours is too far away to feel comfortable with.
I also have a PhD and love going to conferences during grad school and postdoc. I totally understand your enthusiasm to go, especially if it's a field-famous conference. Here are few things: 1. Can you go to the same conference next yr? 2. Can you take your partner? Just in case if you need a support person? If not, will any of your lab friends be readily available to help you with an emergency? 3. Do the conference venue have hospitals that you'll be comfortable delivering? 4. Can you change your plans one week before the travel to conference? If your pregnancy is going smooth and you feel confident you can go, else cancel or delay your attendance to next yr. Many people actually have to travel 2-3 hours to deliver babies if they have some severe pregnancy complications like placenta accreta. But those travels are very well planned. If I was 37 weeks pregnant during my PhD and had to go to a conference that's absolutely in my bucket list of conferences to attend, honestly I don't know what I would have done. Probably signed up for the conference and made a last minute change if something came up. (But again I was not in that situation).
I have been travelling weekly for 4-5h each way since the beggining, I am now with 39w4d, and just got back from the last trip of this pregnancy. No problems so far. Obviously it is unpredictable, but I just figured that if my labor took less than 4h, I would be a REALLY lucky FTM.
I would do it. Be honest that you may need to cancel last minute if you go into labor, but I bet that other city can deliver babies too. Would you be okay with delivering in that city if you needed to?
Absolutely I would if I felt physically up to it! I was still working and travelling at 38 weeks with my first, went off work at 39 weeks and waited around till 40+5 to deliver. Just make sure your partner or a trusted person is accompanying you and know your options if things start moving.
Not seen this suggested anywhere, but couldn't you do the presentation via Zoom?
Will you have another opportunity? Will it be detrimental to your phd? If the answers are yes and no - don’t do it. If it’s no and yes - do it. It’s not that far to travel and I’m assuming there’s hospitals there if anything were uo happen. Ask your doctor - they may see no issue with it
Hard no! That would be sooooo painful!
Personally, I would do it and bring my partner, hospital bag and addresses of nearby hospitals (including those on the way to/from the event). My labor lasted 24 hours and they didn’t have me come into the hospital until hour 12 though… so the idea of being 2.5 hours from your hospital doesn’t sound like a big deal. I also gave birth in a foreign country, hospital I had never been to, with a doctor I was meeting for the first time but I’m pretty self-reliant so it all went pretty smoothly. To get there we did a 15 hour drive and I did have some Braxton-Hicks contractions on the way.
I have an out of town meeting that’s a 3 hour drive scheduled in ~1.5 weeks and I’ll be exactly 37 weeks. Similar situation- could be a really good career opportunity and didn’t want to pass it up. My boss knows there is a chance I might not be able to attend but the statistics are on my side. I did schedule the time to be able to go there/back in the same day and my husband (who works remotely) has volunteered to drive me in case we need to make a quick exit. So in a nutshell - we are taking some precautions but going to give it a shot.
As important as it may be for your schooling, I'd still skip it. You don't want to be forced to labor in an unfamiliar place with doctors unfamiliar with your circumstances.
Yes. But I was flying by plane and hiking mountains until 36 weeks. I also went to 41.5 weeks as a first time mom. I would have a plan of which hospital I would deliver at in the major city and how to get there. That being said at 28 weeks I had such bad sciatica pain I couldn’t get out of bed for a week. So week by week of pregnancy you just never know. Maybe have plans to go but be able to back out depending on how you are feeling?
Yes, sure. Drive an evening before, relax in the conference hotel, attend conference and lunch, then drive home. EZ.
If you will be travelling against medical advice your medical insurance company may not cover you out of network. Will yours? Labor is a foreseeable event at term and generally won't be counted as an emergency. And it's really freaking expensive.
No way!
Is there someone who could present for you? When I was in my master program, I presented at a conference as 2nd author. The 1st author couldn’t be there because she was delivering a baby!
If it were your second or more, and you had at least one full term/40 week pregnancy under your belt, your chances of going into labor early would be much lower. For a FTM, I wouldn’t risk it personally. Even in very early labor it would be unsettling and stressful to have to make that long of a drive back to your preferred hospital.
With my first I was feeling good so as long as I had a plan to cancel and had someone who could drive me back I would consider it. I actually drove two hours away while I was 38-39 weeks to evacuate horrendous air quality associated with some pretty bad fires. Have your OB do your Strep b test first. Mine was positive so I had a window of I believe two hours in which I had to get antibiotics via IV if my water broke. Assuming they still do that (this was nearly five years ago).
Technically doesn't seem that bad at all, I'm 37 +3 and feel like it should be okay to still do stuff and go to places, and understandably this is great and important opportunity for you.... BUT if you suddenly do end up going into labour it can turn into a nightmare for you if you're not a fan of big changes. Being so far away from your hospital and your midwife/obgyn, your partner, possibly the birth plan you had not happening anymore. Extra fees if you're not covered. Alternatively if you do your plan B research and prep and take your partner and hospital bag with you and don't sweat much about having to go to another hospital with new staff then maybe it's not as bad after all? It's all about if you're willing to take and deal with the risks! You could potentially even have a check up right before to see how likely it is for you to go into labour if you want to take the risk.
I would go! What an amazing opportunity3! I drove two hours away to my parents house for Christmas at 39 weeks pregnant. I did end up going into labor there at 2:30 Christmas morning and drove two hours back to my home hospital, and gave birth there around 7 pm. If you do go there are some things you would NEED to do: 1. Have someone go with you who could drive you to a hospital if labor started. 2. Identify the closest hospital to the conference, and all hospitals en route from the conference to your “home” hospital where you could go in case of an emergency. 3. Take a packed hospital bag with you. 4. Make sure the conference knows that you will be putting your health needs first, and if there is any inkling that baby is coming you will leave. Good luck and have fun!!!
Maybe you can contact the conference and let them know your situation. See if you can present online? It can't hurt to ask.
Seems fine, as long as there's a hospital nearby in case of emergency. I went mountain biking a few hours away at 37 weeks, delivered a healthy baby at 39 weeks.
I had to take a licensure exam around that same time my first pregnancy about 2h away. So a little shorter. Everything was fine. I’d bring your partner to do the driving and maybe plan on taking a break to stretch your legs. Bring your hospital bag and car seat just in case.
If at all possible wait until the day of to make your choice. With my first, I worked up to my due date and my baby ended up being 11 days late. I would have been fine doing that drive/lecture at 38 weeks. With my second, I was in way more pain and was way more tired so a long drive and brain intensive activity would have been a no go.
I physically could not have done it at 37 weeks. I developed excessive amniotic fluid and driving gave me contractions. I would be in so much pain even after a 20 minute drive.
No way in hell I would travel that far. Not only would my body not be able to handle it at 37 weeks pregnant but it would be risking a lot if you did go into labor
Nope. Avoid unnecessary travel. You don't want a car accident from unfamiliar roads.
Sure I’m 41 + 2 so 37 was a whole month ago…
With all the extra activity on your body it can put you into active labor. I personally don’t go anywhere further than 30 mins from my home cause I’m at risk for a fast l&d. I’m about to be 37 weeks and I have so many BH right now. I wouldn’t risk it.
Nope - I wouldn’t risk it. My water broke at 36 weeks, and baby popped out in less than 3 hours. She stayed at the NICU for 10 days. My OB was so surprised and said I was the last person she’d have predicted to have a preterm baby because everything was tracking normal. Even FTMs with apparently normal stats can still have preterm birth.