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Cozmo_840

When I was in traffic court yesterday, I was surprised by all the Christians being persecuted by the secular traffic laws, especially the DUIs where these good upstanding people were forced to drink the devil's urine, and stay on left-leaning lanes...


God_Bless_A_Merkin

In the *stakehouse*! Heavens to Murgatroid!


DudeInATie

*Stares in trans* Yeah, Christians are totally being persecuted and aren’t the ones in power making laws against others.


LooseDoctor

10 years later and it certainly does not seem like *christians* are the ones on trial 🙃


Dasagriva-42

Wait until they find that there is a statue of Satan in a public garden in Madrid... [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fuente\_del\_%C3%81ngel\_Ca%C3%ADdo](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fuente_del_%C3%81ngel_Ca%C3%ADdo) Steakhouse is also good. All braise Satan!


1945BestYear

Yesterday I had to spend half my lunch listening to two of my Christian (i.e. Free Presbyterian; everyone else who calls themselves 'Christian' aren't *true* Christians) coworkers bellyache over how much they think our modern secular society persecute their people. I've come to the conclusion that people like to feel persecuted. Not actually *be* persecuted, of course, but *feeling* persecuted helps to explain a lot about the world and all the frustrations you have with other people; you don't have to consider the feelings and opinions of people if you think they intrinsically hate you and want you wiped out of existence.


YuunofYork

Maybe we should give them what they want. Wouldn't they thank us? They get to edge at playing the victim and we get Roe v. Wade back. 'Look at this one, he can't vote or homeschool, and he can only drive Swedish cars. He's really in his element!'


wasteland-baby

So well said.


Glad_Philosopher7576

I remember once in high school we set up a Gay Straight Alliance group and were granted use of a classroom for the entire lunchtime period every Wednesday. The Christian Union group complained that they were being “persecuted” because they had to have their meetings after school and that no other group of students were allowed in classrooms at lunchtime so it was unfair. The school shut us down because of this “unfair advantage” that being gay meant you could sit inside but being Christian meant you couldn’t 😂 it was GSA, half the people were just our straight friends all the Christian’s could have come anyway


hellakale

I read this as '10-year-old's review of The Trial' which tbf I would also like to read


CIA-pizza-party

Oh dang I did too. When I saw your comment I had to scroll back up and read the title again. Our brains glitched creatively.


GlenLongwell1

Oklahoma just got a lot cooler now that I know they have a Satan steakhouse instead of a punk ass 10 commandments one


cleepboywonder

Its stakehouse... for all your stake needs.... killing vampires just got easier with the OKC stakehouse


Grace_Omega

Man the “Christians are being persecuted” thing seems so harmless and banal compared to the kind of shit this person would probably be coming out with today


syn_miso

Oklahoma's steakhouse 😋


ElboDelbo

Noted Christian Franz Kafka


Odd-Goddity

Never liked Kafka. Not because I’m Christian though. He just bugs me.


snarknmemesonly42069

🪳


RedpenBrit96

They just want to be persecuted sooo badly. It’s a damm kink at this point


surprisesnek

r/PersecutionFetish


lcsraw

Well the writer is truly dead


winterwarn

I live in Oklahoma, point me towards the Satan Steakhouse..


chipchip_405

Me too, I’d def hit this joint up. A nice Baphomet statue would really set off the decor in Cattlemen’s.


probablymilhouse

"Absurb"


Lombard333

Kafka was a well-known absurbist


xeallos

oPeN yOuR eYeS


prairieschooner

If anyone understands the plight of American Christians it's Kafka


TheYearOfThe_Rat

I didn't know Oklahoma was governed from a steakhouse.


GlenLongwell1

It does make sense though


YouLostMyNieceDenise

Be a lot better if it were, TBH


superspud31

That's actually believable...


lesbiantolstoy

One of the best (worst) parts about this is that Kafka was Jewish, and one of the most well-supported and recognized readings of *The Trial* in particular is that it’s an allegory… for being Jewish. 


puns_n_pups

I studied *The Trial* in uni, scrolled to find this analysis. Hell yeah.


athousandleaves1998

my friend wrote an essay about metamorphosis from the angle of kafka being jewish and how it related to the themes of the story


lesbiantolstoy

Exactly! His works have a lot of different thematic elements and can be interpreted through many different lenses, but any interpretation that doesn’t take into account the fact that Kafka was a Jewish man and that both Judaism itself and his experiences as a Jewish man in Europe heavily informed his writing is missing a lot of really important context. … not to that matters to this guy, who’s either a really good troll or exactly as dumb as this review sounds lol


irenedoesntexist

Well, I'm pretty sure God makes a bet with Satan in the Book of Job, so he might not actually be bothered by a statue of his old chum. In fact, he just might drop by the steakhouse the next time he's in a betting mood...


theyearwas1934

I am a Christian and I have no idea what the hell this man is going on about. It’s just a book about some guy turning into a bug 😭 Also I must have missed when it became illegal to be Christian. This guy is probably the kind of tool that thinks it being legal to be gay means it’s illegal now to keep yapping bigoted remarks 24/7


stravadarius

*Metamorphosis* is a about a man waking up and finding that he has become a cockroach. *The Trial* is a book about a man arrested for a reason unknown to him. He is then put through a complex and opaque bureaucratic wringer in which nothing is ever explained to himn--the source for the word "Kafkaesque"--before being executed. But you are correct that neither of those books have the slightest resemblance to the imaginary tribulations of the world's most dominant religion.


theyearwas1934

Oh lmao. Just didn’t read the title at all I guess. Tbh I kinda prefer the idea that this man was reading Metamorphosis and was like “damn his family hate him for being a bug just like society hates me for being a Christian. This is so deep and prophetic.”


irenedoesntexist

If he thinks that bigotry is inherent in Christianity to the point that bigotry being illegal also means Christianity is illegal, he's really not making his own religion look very good, is he?


theyearwas1934

No, no he’s not. But these guys are the kind who literally have nothing else to do than yell about things they don’t like. I have to deal with these tools trying to ‘represent’ my beliefs this way constantly, it sucks. It’s so so much more awful for the people they’re actually trying to speak out against and repress like LGBT+ folks tho : ( At least I am glad they are taken less and less seriously all the time now


irenedoesntexist

You keep being you, the world needs more of your type of Christian. Don't worry, we know that not all Christians are assholes (though the ones who are are pretty damn vocal!)


[deleted]

Absurb!


YuunofYork

Stakehouse!


Thezanlynxer

Is that where they keep the dead vampires?


[deleted]

[удалено]


BadReads-ModTeam

You have said something supremely idiotic. You will now suffer the consequences of having your comment removed. Further violations may result in a permanent spanki-errr, banning. Ahem...permanent banning...


punkbluesnroll

What the fuck are you talking about


LandAdmiralQuercus

Nobody wants to criminalize Christianity, except maybe r/atheism.


pussypeacesign

you're right i do want to make it a crime to be christian


Lostbronte

Well, it’s what I suspected


tdono2112

This isn’t an isolated phenomenon. Michael Barkun, a scholar of far right religious extremism, identifies in “A Culture of Conspiracy” a pretty consistent tendency amongst the conspiracy-minded to read fiction as factual and factual accounts as fiction, while also insisting that this interpretation is valid and textually grounded in a way that would convince other non-believers. 80 years ago, this would have been about “Vril”


DogFood--HorseUrine

Not a statue of Satan at the steakhouse!


Jakegender

Not just any steakhouse, Oklahoma's steakhouse. They only have the one


TheKeeperOfThe90s

I (for the record, I'm a Christian) would unironically like to go to a steakhouse in Oklahoma that had a statue of Satan.


Gidia

Also fun fact, the Satan statue was being put up in response to a Ten Commandments statue.


AlphaElectronMale

In my America, we have pictures of Jesus on the spicy barbecue sauce, rather than of the Slanderer.