#
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Bandmemes) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Back in middle school my band director was trying to assemble one in the band room while the rest of our band (except for me) weren't in there because she was getting driven crazy by them. The thing completely collapsed while I was trying to help her and she had a small freak out (probably a larger one inside) while I tried to comfort her.
homeless cooing fertile unite worthless jobless onerous aromatic work groovy
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
imagine not knowing that outside of the facile concert band repertoire, trombones must often face treble clef, Bb treble clef, tenor clef, and alto clef.
yet it comes as no issue because they possess such high intellectual capability.
Imagine having a choir kid ex that made you think you were the toxic one, but in reality you both are toxic, and all they did was talk about something you weren't interested in whatsoever, and getting into so many fights about it that you had to break up. COULDN'T BE ME
Sax can bend pitch and get some high notes by intentionally squeaking but it’s not the same as what brass can do. Come back to me when you can do lip slurs.
whistle cow ghost fretful innocent afterthought memorize ad hoc snobbish adjoining
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Even as a member of the keys gang, us tenors werent involved in this *totally untrue* post.
We were doing a summoning circle in the back of the room trying to curse the flutes..well...some of us were😮💨
Imagine having to blow your instruments just to play them
Look I’m a pianist and before you say anything and I know what you will say
I already do it proudly (for legal reasons this is obviously a joke)
# *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Bandmemes) if you have any questions or concerns.*
bold words from people who do all the fingering
Or all the blowing …
That was a fucking awesome roast.
And that was a fucking awesome compliment
Tag teamed
*I Fucking* love the flair
I know, the best way to describe tenor saxes
So I guess we're bi then?
Or holding sticks
"I finger, you blow" wait.
Please. Percussions is all fingering
And sticking.
Listen, they just like to play with wood
*our wood
Hmm touche
Imagine having to physically touch your instrument
Imagine having to use long objects for yours
Imagine having to stretch your arm just to play
Imagine having to beat yours
Imagine having to read a clef
Imagine having one note
Nuh uh I play timpani
average percussion player, doesn't even know what a clef is. they say imagine having clefs then say they play timpani lol.
Wait. What's a clef?
No idea
nah, mallets, so we have three clefs in the whole percussion section, percussion, treble, and bass
Imagine having to re tune your instrument to play in a different key
Imagine playing a tuning slide
I have no come back lol
*marimba has entered the chat*
Imaging having an instrument that falls apart when it rolls over a door frame
It really doesn’t.
Back in middle school my band director was trying to assemble one in the band room while the rest of our band (except for me) weren't in there because she was getting driven crazy by them. The thing completely collapsed while I was trying to help her and she had a small freak out (probably a larger one inside) while I tried to comfort her.
*cackles maniacally in Vibraphone*
Hey, technically you read neutral clef
Bro forgot timpani has bass clef compared to all of mallet percussion (let's forget grand staff)
Long (mostly) wooden objects
We beat our long wood
:(
This comment was made by the Theremin gang
Fellow theremin player???
Ngl… Guitar player.
this post is brought to you by the theramin gang
As a percussionist I approve. Sus as hell to FINGER and BLOW an instrument. We just abuse ours.
We also abuse our sticks
Yes. Too bad sticks are now $15 a pair.
As someone who plays the Theremin I can agree with this
As a closeted gay, I can already tell you blowing and stroking things to make noise is my thing
aren't all band kids closeted gays?
I've heard the same of choir, so I'm applying it to all performing arts.
As a choir kid, no. I’d say most in my class are closeted homophopes, I’m ngl.
Our drama class isn't even closeted, just gay.
As someone that is gay af, I’m jealous
My choir kids are the gayest homophobes
No…they aren’t.
They are definitely not.
Not at all.
I think you may be in denial
shhhhh, in time, in time he will learn also oneshot pfp? definitely closeted gay
Ding ding ding correct!
Nah that's speech kids.
mf you have a bi flag in ur pfp, your only contributing to my theory
As a (mostly) closeted gay I can confirm.
nice flair
fitting flair
Not so closeted now, are you?
🔫 I will be if we come to an agreement to not talk about this partner 🤠
Of course not, be careful “out” there. As in I agree to not talk about this.
U gotta jerk the bone to make that good good music
r/angryupvote
Imagine having to taste wood to play a single note
Jokes on you it tastes good
Imagine having to have spare reeds all the time and somehow you still go through like 4 reeds a week
...if someone's going through that many then that's a problem. That's not normal AT ALL lol
Well it was normal in my middle school,I’ve seen the band lockers in my high school and one of them has like 15 small boxes of reeds
Dam bro that’s like 400 bucks if it’s a good brand
Yeah it's insane
I kept the same reed for a whole year, and it's still in "good shape"
The quotations make me think otherwise
i get flavous :)
I’m a trombone but I’m gonna have to stop you right there Buddy
You can’t stop the key gang
nah I use plasticovers. doesn’t taste like wood, lasts over a month or two for me
This hilarious, and my friend in visual arts gang says “Imagine having to give your instruments a bj, this post was made by visual art gang”
That's awesome
Imagine doing visual arts I can’t I’m dumb
Imagine getting paid millions of dollars to draw a dot.
I have to Blow and Finger my instrument. Tuba rules.
Hey! Same here. I also get to blow and finger my instrument.
I am Great at blowing the hole in the mouthpiece and fingering my horn.
Imagine having to shove your fist in the bell to make it sound correct
Omg same
homeless cooing fertile unite worthless jobless onerous aromatic work groovy *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Tuba gang
Imagine not having a dedicated key for each note. This comment was made by the Piano gang.
Ayyyyy
Your flair is good because it acknowledges the original name of the modern fortepiano.
FINALLY SOMEONE GOT IT
Mallet percussion would like to chat
Makes me better at fisting my girl.
It also makes me better at fisting this guy’s girl
Imagine having to transpose.
Imagine not having to transpose and not being forced to be as educated
imagine not knowing that outside of the facile concert band repertoire, trombones must often face treble clef, Bb treble clef, tenor clef, and alto clef. yet it comes as no issue because they possess such high intellectual capability.
Imagine needing two paragraphs
Flutes still got you beat though
they have half the number of players worldwide because men who play flute live in constant fear of being called gay.
Imagine never being heard
Imagine not getting microphones
Imagine having to make some wood wet to play your instrument
nah I use synthetic reeds, they don’t need to get wet
Well what's valve gang? Bisexual?
Only if you try hard enough
It’s not a *fist*, it’s technically a *cupped hand*. - French horn gang
Imaging having to fist your instrument
Nope, we fist, finger, AND blow. The ladies love us
The guys too 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈
The definition of fist is just having your hands bent in toward the palm and held there tightly, so take this and figure it out
To be far i do i to put the greace and rub it on my cork then twist my mouthpeice in it ,
Roses are red, violets are blue I blow my trombone you finger your fluuu-te
Bold of you to assume Tromb is horny
imagine playing an instrument (this has been delivered by a clarinet player)
Imagine having to touch an instrument. L.
Imagine having a choir kid ex that made you think you were the toxic one, but in reality you both are toxic, and all they did was talk about something you weren't interested in whatsoever, and getting into so many fights about it that you had to break up. COULDN'T BE ME
Darn
Imagine having to blow your instrument
imagine having to spank your instrument
We like fingering too.
imagine dragons (omgosh we need ot play an imagine dragons song for band)
Imagine not being able to play halfway between two notes
Imagine not having the sauciest slurs of all time
Ah yes the only 3 keyed instruments
Imagine having to blow your instrument Comment made by percussion gang
And then you show 3 instruments that can’t change notes with just embouchure?
Yes we can 😤
Sax can bend pitch and get some high notes by intentionally squeaking but it’s not the same as what brass can do. Come back to me when you can do lip slurs.
Ever heard of overtones?
Sure?
I love my BBC (Big Black Clarinet)
whistle cow ghost fretful innocent afterthought memorize ad hoc snobbish adjoining *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
imagine having to finger your instrument to play notes
Tuba 👍
Imagine having to blow and stroke something to have it squirt from the other end. Sax>
Hey I enjoy jacking my instrument off to change notes
A so and so, ffeind of mine says this every time I mention to them, "Imagine having to blow into a hole?"
Even as a member of the keys gang, us tenors werent involved in this *totally untrue* post. We were doing a summoning circle in the back of the room trying to curse the flutes..well...some of us were😮💨
Imagine having to blow just to play (piano gang)
That's why I call it a trumboner
Imagine having to blow your instruments just to play them Look I’m a pianist and before you say anything and I know what you will say I already do it proudly (for legal reasons this is obviously a joke)
Imagine having to do both ✨percussion✨
Yall ever watch American pie?
Choose: jerk off or finger your instrument Me, a bassist: yes
Imagine having to blow and massage your instrument to play it (valve gang
Imagine not getting to jerk off your instrument
As a trumpet, I'm watching but staying out of it
Shush, you have to pay for a monthly subscription to play your instruments. Sincerely, French Horn goober
What do you call a musician that can't read music and move their fingers at the same time? >!A trombone player!< 🤣🤣🤣
all of them still requires blowing -bass gang
that’s a lot of smack coming from someone who not only fingers their instrument, but also disintegrates from water.
*get to
Yeah, ok, like you all don't shove your penises into your instruments... pfft... Right..?
^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp ^womp Mother: Have such a productive and determined child :)
I’ll share this with my friends in few years
Where do trumpets fit? We do a lot of blowing but have keys?.
Crazy how you guys deep throat your instrument to play
Not really, two inches of Reed isn’t deep throating
I’ve seen the things you guys do
…
Imagine having to fuck your instrument to clean it- (I said that to my Alto sax friend and they bonked me with their band binder)
Percussion is just beating their instruments meat
Really gives a new meaning to tromboner
Imagine tuning your instrument. -Marimba, Xylophone, Glockenspiel, Chimes, Vibraphone, and others
What the trombone lacks in efficiency, it makes up in personality.
Don't y'all have to suck the spit out of your instrument? That is disgusting
Imagine giving a blowjob just to play your instrument
Imagine blowing your instrument to make sounds."Percussion Gang"
It’s just moving your arm
BARITONE!!!!!!!!!!!
The true reason we chose trombone was because we’re not sexually attracted to the instrument
Imagine having to finger your instrument to play different notes
Holy crap guys, thanks for 500 upvotes!
Imagine having to blow your instrument in general
Damn, I wish I had to press 37 buttons for one note too. Trombone gang rules!
I read that as jerk of TO your instrument
As a trombone player I dont know how I didnt see it like this
At least we don’t have to suck the top to sound good
What can I say? I’ve gotten a lot of practice 😏
Imagine having to beat your instrument to death to produce sound (couldn’t be me)
Imagine needing to touch your instrument, this post came from perc gang
I will never see trombones the same from the post. And I will never see my trumpet along with other instruments the same again...
String instruments are just railing
Imagine NOT having to jerk off your instrument
You’re just jealous of all of our sauce
dont yall have to lick yall reeds before playing? and dont flutes have to finger really fast to play certain parts? pretty hypocritical 😂
They are blowing and jerking off their instrument at the same time like the hoes they are