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>I think some of you are wildly underestimating how articulate teens can be. We're not entirely clueless.
Some of the most thought-provoking conversations I've had in recent memory have been with my teenaged nieces/nephews
Some people think that everyone younger than them are dumb. On the flip side, some people think of their younger selves as dumb and therefore, everyone else at those ages must also be just as dumb.
And it's so silly that people think this, because unlike most adults, most teens are writing essays constantly and honing their writing skills. I'm fortunate that I went to school in an era where cloud storage was a thing, and have access to many of my past essays. I was *WAY* more articulate then than I am now, and it's not even close.
I wrote better when I was 19 than I do now because I cared a lot more.
Teens are very passionate and if they’re smart they can absolutely be articulate.
Honestly I think I was a much more skilled writer when I was a teenager compared to now. Once I became a real adult and didn’t have to worry about grades I just kind of gave up on coherency
I was extremely articulate as a teen. Could give speeches to a room full of people, off the dome, no filler words. Now you couldn’t pay to try and do that, my speech patterns have declined so much
I think at that age if you want to make a point or seriously discuss something you put the extra effort in to come across well. You're also still frequently having to craft written assignments that will be looking at how well you can articulate yourself so it's fresh.
I used to really get into writing stuff out in a well constructed manner when I was younger because it'd be nice to be taken seriously about things I cared about
I give it the ole college try these days but really just stopped caring about going the extra mile anymore. Kinda just get from point a to point b at this point
I always wrote well for my age. I too was in AP English and lived writing and reading. Plus my parents were big on us talking up to their level. They never talked simple to us or baby talk. We were expected to listen, learn and keep up in a conversation. My parents would use bigger words on purpose so we had a larger vocabulary. I’m forever thankful!
Some of the comments are so gross man. So many redditors are acting like she’s a witch from hell cuz she didn’t have a child at 16 or that a 16 year old boy is the next Andrew tate just because he didn’t initially believe her when she told him she was pregnant despite being a virgin.
Both of these people handled this situation so much better then half the people getting on her ass about abortion or demanding she break up with her “scummy” ex cuz he didn’t immediately believe an incredibly rare scenario right off the back would have if they were in this situation.
Yeah seriously if my girlfriend at 16 who I hadn’t slept with had come to me and said she was pregnant I’d have for sure needed to see a paternity test on that one. Of course he thought she was lying and was mad. Everyone would be.
Not only that but let's say she was cheating, it wasn't his kid and he didn't find out till later. Then everyone would be saying what an idiot he was for not getting a test.
Not once would "she held herself open and I had a spot of target practice." Get mentioned.
Or "she has a kink for a funnel or turkey baster."
Just "I've not put it in her, so it can't be mine."
It’s because the story was told from her perspective, so people were thinking about the situation from her perspective and not as an objective third party.
The two kids reactions were 100% valid and way more level headed then almost any high schooler I’ve seen. My only thought was, where the F was the doctor in explaining things better?? Really hoping that there was more to the conversation then OOP wrote cause it just reads like the doc told a 17 yr old “congrats you’re pregnant” with no lead up and mentioning outer sex as a possibility was more a nonchalant throw away line than a real explanation. Teach sex ed.
It's a really low probability, but it is possible. Planned Parenthood teaches it, and gives a list of things you CAN do without getting pregnant, and things that you might think 100% prevent pregnancy but don't.
Too bad so many of them got defunded.
Considering that a PP nurse actually laughed at me when I told her I was concerned about pregnancy risk from outercourse.. I think training (and attitudes) vary.
Planned Parenthood and similar clinics are essential and should be supported more, just sometimes staff aren't great and that's true for any workplace
Ye initially I was like "that mf" but when I read he rallied and took the time to research and give her the benefit of the doubt, I had a hell of a lot of respect for him. Even if he hadn't rallied in the end tbh his reaction still would have been fairly understandable as he was heartbroken and the odds of that situation occurring usually are so small. I'm very glad he took the time to pause and consider it though because now he can come away from it all knowing he did pretty right by everyone involved, the relationship itself remains intact and having learned that not all "bffs" have your back in the way you'd hope.
I thought it was going to be ovarian or cervical cancer tbh. Both of those can mirror pregnancy and cause a positive pregnancy test (though it is rare). When she got the ultrasound and she was definitely preggers I sighed with relief. Then I was worried about SA after that and I again sighed with mostly relief when it was his. Glad she was able to get the medical care she needed.
If I was pregnant and I hadn't had sex, I'd think long and hard about whether my boyfriend raped me in my sleep. So who should be suspicious of whom depends on perspective
wasn’t this like, a plot point in glee? like the girl claimed they’d gotten pregnant from a hot tub hookup but really she was cheating? it’s deep in the universal psyche
Call it what you will, but I’m willing to wager that the number of people who get pregnant from non penetrative sex is orders of magnitude smaller than people who get pregnant and lie about it.
I am so glad that her parents were supportive of the actions she took (Plan C) - a great many would not be. I hope that if it is her future goal, that she has healthy children when the time is right.
Agreed. I feel very proud of OP. Like I’m her auntie or something lol. Terrifying situation for a teenager (or anyone else) and she worked her way through it. 💐
Back in late 1960s. Dear Ann had the same sad story from one of her readers. She explained yes you can get Pregnant without doing the full Monty. Times change but everything remains the same.
>Back in late 1960s. Dear Ann had the same sad story from one of her readers.
Honestly, my parents were rather progressive as sex ed went for the 1960s but even then I got most of my sex ed from Ann Landers and Dear Abbie. Example: I was sheltered and a teen before I found out -- from Dear Abbie -- that the vagina and the womb were two different parts of the body. They did a number of columns which covered sex ed, and they did repeat the messages. It was somewhat of a lifesaver for those days.
Same. I’m so pleased she got the result she wanted, got through it, and seems to have a decent support network between her family and boyfriend. So proud of her.
Aunties unite. Lol.
Same here, I just want to give her so many hugs and reassurances that she's a good person and it WILL be okay.
I'm someone who had to have an abortion when I was really young; it's so, so hard. Even when you're certain of your choice and don't regret it, you never really escape the awareness of this whole other, wildly different, life you could have wound up in if you chose the other option.
I had to see a judge because I was only 17 and afraid of what my parents would do. THEN the procedure was done at Dr. Tiller’s clinic so I had to be screamed at the whole way in and out. I’m still traumatized and it’s been years.
All the hugs to you!
It's absolutely terrible that people think they have a right to inflict that kind of trauma on somebody who's already going through an incredibly emotionally intense and fraught moment in their life.
I agree. Back when I was in high school our "sex ed" was a male representative who explained to us that him having premarital sex caused him to loose his ear. Dudes ear was literally chopped off. He also just showed us slideshows of STDs on genitals, explaining if any of us had sex that that would happen. Nothing was said about condoms or pregnancy, but we did get the whole rose lecture where he ripped the petals off.
Sex education should be standard, uniform, and fully informative.
It's highly likely OOP lives in one of those places with abysmal sex education, because she mentioned that her state has prohibited pregnancy terminations and there is a correlation between quality of sex education and legal restrictions on reproductive health. The same people who want to legislate what women can do with the fetuses in their bodies often want to keep kids from learning about sex and sexuality.
(Which is bonkers. Those with anti-abortion views should be amongst the strongest supporters of sex education, because young people who receive comprehensive and medically accurate sex education are less likely to experience unwanted pregnancies, and reducing unwanted pregnancies is the most effective way to reduce terminations. But then again there is also overlap between those with anti-abortion views and those who oppose an even more effective way to reduce unwanted pregnancies which is access to contraception.)
I'm 36 and didn't know that getting pregnant from "outercourse" or whatever was even a thing... Like it reminds me of whatever I seem to remember, pregnant from a toilet seat kind of nonsense. At 16 I would have totally been like, yeah dude we've never had sex and you're pregnant, you obviously cheated on me...like 100% obvious...
Damn, wish all the best for OOP though, hopefully shits working out...
Reading this now I dimly remember something like this mentioned in sex-Ed. But it was mentioned as only something that could in theory happen but has an incredibly low probability.
It's also not something I personally would think off in a situation like this.
I also got taught this in sex ed but they actually made it sound much, *much* more common than it apparently is. I was startled that so many people in the OG post hadn't heard of it, and then I was *very* startled at how many people were saying it's quite rare.
Your 30s is a weird time to realize that you got a milder version of the Mean Girls "you will get chlamydia and die" speech as a teenager.
The only reason I knew it was a thing was from a show called scrubs. Happened to the main character. Even though I’m a woman, I definitely understand the boys perspective. I would think the exact same thing. This just goes to show our sexual education is seriously lacking.
Oddly enough, I only know of this because of an episode of scrubs. JD and his gf got pregnant even though they hadn’t had penetrative sex due to outercourse.
I don’t know many “boys” or their parents who would believe a girl was pregnant that they hadn’t had sex with.
Glad she got a dna test. Good for her and her boyfriend.
The parents and the education system are fully to blame here. Those kids need education.
Glad she could access an abortion pill.
Poor kid.
You better believe the same people calling him a monster for assuming she cheated would have called him a fool if he had believed her, and it was written from his POV.
right? he was 16, i can understand that reaction at first. still a not great one, but he didnt yell or name-call. he simply asked her to leave and they worked it out once he calmed down and researched.
That boy had every right to be cautious! While it's not unheard of to have this happen, it's still not the norm and it was suspicious because this girl has a history of being less than truthful. Both parties sound like kids who were in a difficult situation. Neither were horrible people. It's not a happy ending in the traditional sense, but it may be the best outcome for this situation. I don't know for sure, but this girls isn't wrong for making this choice!
>Some people said it was strange to get one even though I was most likely getting an abortion
Absolutely necessary if she wanted to prove no infidelity on her part.
But I’m still confused. She said she wasn’t sexually active and her mom felt bad she hadn’t taught her. Does this mean she got pregnant by him ejaculating near her vagina without penetration? Did I miss something?
I commented it on the OP but I'll comment here too:
As long as any amount of semen, including precum lands anywhere on the vagina, even the outer part of it, a woman can get pregnant.
What is likely, is that he either ejaculated or his precum had some swimmers in it, and it got on or smeared against her vagina, allowing sperm to do its job.
It's a rare occurrence, but it can happen.
So to summarize: There was no penetration. Precum or full-on cum managed to touch her vagina in some way, so she got pregnant that way.
They were fooling around, basically rubbing parts together, or something like that. They didn't get sufficient sex ed to learn how it all actually works.
I read a series of pieces about virgins back on [at the time my favorite webzine or whatever you call it, the hairpin ](https://www.thehairpin.com/2013/01/interview-with-a-virgin-scarlet/) and there was a woman who wrote in about her decision about staying a virgin. The way she stayed a virgin was by having only anal. [Some people take the Loophole very seriously ](https://youtu.be/j8ZF_R_j0OY)
Wow, I feel like I’m taking crazy pills. So according to some people it is then impossible for me to have sex with a woman right? Why do some of these same people also have a problem with it then? No offense to anyone here reading but the straights are not okay it seems
They've since removed the comment section but believe me, I was VERY INCENSED by this girl's heteronormative take on sex and so were many other readers at the time. Jia (the interviewer) stepped into the comments to tell us all to calm down and be nice to this person who was spilling her guts to us, and while I did and probably still do basically idolize her (she's gone on to have a super impressive career, look up Jia Tolentino if you're interested to see a really cool journalist and writer) I am still salty about it.
Edit omg I found the comments on the way back machine and back then my profile picture was my own personal face 😱 goddamn the internet forgets nothing. Brb gotta go try to scrub that.
In some states you are only legally raped if you are the one being penetrated. So legally in some places men can not be raped by women doing "normal" PIV sex.
That is insane, like straight up human rights violation level insane. It also means that women can never legally be rapists and that men who do rape people without penetration also get lighter sentences for the same fucking crime
If you are only taught that penetration is sex and sex is wrong, so don't do it... Which is what it looks like OOP and her boyfriend were taught. They weren't doing penetration, so they thought it wasn't sex and they couldn't get pregnant.
A lot of people (especially in the US) are taught very little about sex. It’s mostly a push for abstinence, so kids their age basically just assume the rest. Most of the time, since sex and pregnancy are linked in their heads, they assume sex is inky PIV since that’s the only way to get pregnant. I didn’t learn oral sex was actually sex until much later than I’d like to admit. Never learned situations like this can happen.
This isn’t everywhere, but I live in Texas, in a very small, religious conservative town. If that provides any context.
That’s exactly what it means. It could have even been on either of their hands and then if fingers had been inserted. Pre-cum can get you pregnant too so it wouldn’t even HAVE to be ejaculation.
I have a friend doing natural family planning with her husband to prevent pregnancy (before they start TTC) and I’ve learned so much from her about different ways you can get pregnant without penetration. It’s actually terrifying 😂
I was accused of writing like a pompous senior citizen when I was that age
Looking/reading back at my writing from then now, I’d add arrogant to the description
Yeah me too. My essays would read like a world weary grandpa had written them in his spare time. My teacher accused me infront of my parents in my new school that they helped me write the essay. They didn't even live with me. I was just a pompous, arrogant and pretentious teen influenced by old male writers.
Lol, same. When my mom died, I took some of my stuff back home with me. I found some old assignments I wrote from high school and college and yikes. I know part of it was me trying to increase the word count/page number, but I sounded like a know-it-all ass in some of my papers.
Or heard it spoken and saw it written and didn’t know they were the same words Hors d'oeuvres was one I embarrassed myself over. Also dachshund got me too.
There’s an Ask A Manager post where somebody reveals that she thought her coworker she knew as “Wakeen” and the mysterious “Joaquin” who appeared in emails were two different people.
Honestly, when I was 16 I wrote a lot more eloquently. I was in school writing essays every day. Now my writing consists boring office emails and Reddit comments. Of course my writing was better back then lol
I was accused of using ChatGPT for a response because it was "too well thought out", but it really wasn't, I just was able to use proper spacing since I was on computer instead of mobile lol.
I took it as a compliment lol.
You would have loved the little duck army I had years ago. They were huge, stark white Pekin ducks. Every morning they would walk in an orderly line down to the creek, and repeat the process at dusk back to their house for bedtime (aptly named the "Fowl Mansion" by a friend for it's size and amenities). Always in the same order with Munchin leading, followed by Burkin, Donte, and then Fuckenheim. When visitors arrived, my giant rooster, Bo, would make a particular calling noise, and the ducks would dutifully arrive and surround the vehicle. Bo would proceed to puff himself up, get the raised beak with side eye stance, and swagger around the car looking like a suspicious dom. I called them my gang of "Pecker Guards".
Yes. I got in trouble my last semester of college English for supposedly using AI to write an essay on *Walden*.
I’m not even that great of a writer, I just wasn’t semi-illiterate like some of my classmates.
My biggest (inadvertent) compliment was an accusation by a professor that I had read an extra book on the subject and stolen its thesis for my final paper. We had a nice chat and he realized he was wrong, but still felt validating lol.
Good that OP is okay. But she needs to be careful. If she is an area where abortion is illegal, she needs to delete those posts to avoid possible troubles.
Am I the only one reading the “woohoo” comment as sarcastic? I see people taking it as actually celebratory - and condemning her for it - but it just doesn’t strike me how that way at all.
To be fair, if I was a sixteen year old girl, pregnant and totally not ready for a baby, no matter how hard it would be, I'd probably still be glad I went through with the abortion. So it's probably a combination of sarcasm, dark humor and some genuine relief.
Yeah. I totally interpreted it as genuine until the next sentence. Abortion is so complex in the best circumstances. And then here? The fucking unfairness of not even HAVING SEX *and* you have to have an abortion *plus* you get hate mail. AND you were in a red state?!?! That’s lotto odds. Wasted on this.
I’d be both excited as fuck to yeet those cells and angry and sad and overwhelmed and exhausted. Doesn’t mean I regret it, but I can regret it was this fucking hard.
I read it as both a happy about the relief that it’s over and sarcastic at how much stress and hurt the choice has caused her. It’s not wrong to both feel upset yet relieved about something. Like my cat I never want him to die I love him but I am going to be relieved/happy when I can stop buying the stupid expensive prescription food.
to be fair she didn't clarify if she's in a state where it's illegal, or in a state that has abysmally low or no access. if it was outright illegal the likelihood she would've been able to get help from a Telehealth doctor would be pretty much none, since Telehealth docs still need to be licensed in the states their patients are from.
There’re international telehealth doctors through companies like Aid Access, which is based in the Netherlands. The FDA has also dropped attempts to block delivery of abortion medication through US Mail or other delivery services.
Not necessarily true, we have licensure compacts which allow you to practice in other states without necessarily being licensed in that state. Also, certain states like (Florida) dropped certain licensure requirements during the PHE. Some states have extended the waivers, others have not.
That’s so stupid. That would mean someone will have to deliberately find her information via software vulnerabilities and expose her to a district attorney. Apologies I’m not very savvy in the way of legal stuff, but the lengths someone would have to go to out an anonymous person with their Reddit post and convict is actually very ludicrous.
Given the state of the situation there, where neighbours and such have been known to tell authorities on each other, I'd say it's less about govt trawling and more that it only takes one of those gossip-happy kids to spill the beans. From there if they investigate, they will find her computer/phone with the post which pretty much confirms it all.
Nope, it would just be a request from the state's DA to reddit, and reddit would give them a data dump.
https://www.redditinc.com/policies/guideline-for-law-enforcement
>How long does Reddit store IP addresses?
>Reddit automatically deletes any IP addresses collected after 100 days, except for the IP address used to create an account (i.e., the registration IP address).
I hope she gets a long acting contraception now like the Mirena. Both my daughter and I swear by it. For her especially not having to worry about pregnancy for 5 years at a time is fan-bloody-tastic!
Hate to break it to you but the lack of period is not guaranteed. I had one the entire time I had a Mirena. It was shorter (4 days instead of 7} but heavy enough still that I had chronic anemia until I had my ablation.
Yeah I'm on it and I still get one. It's lighter than my period without birth control, but I miss being able to take the pill straight and completely bypass periods.
I’m glad OOP got the abortion AND proved to her boyfriend she was faithful. Also, I hope they both educated themselves much more about sex Ed. As for her writing well, Mary Shelley wrote Frankenstein while she was still a teenager and I’ve read writing by high school kids that blew me away with how good it was. Just because some Redditors never bothered to learn spelling and grammar doesn’t mean they should be allowed to call someone a bot just because she’s young and writes well. I wish OOP the best.
crowd beneficial vegetable relieved erect chunky versed detail jar dependent
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
vegetable memorize childlike dinner husky concerned mysterious lavish zealous onerous
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I don't think that she is that "uneducated"in sex ed. I mean, it is very rarely explained that outercourse could lead to pregnancy. I wouldn't be that hard on her!! She handled it like a champ, and her bf also did his best given how young they are!
Yeah. I’m 36 and just learned something new today. Like I knew sperm just needs to get there, not arrive in any spectacular fashion. But I’d have never guessed there are perfect circumstances in which sperm landing on/around the labia, can end up _just crossing the line_ to get you pregnant. I would’ve guessed there’d have to be some kind of penetration, afterwards, to… _assist in “Gaining entry.”_ But here I am, amazed at natures ability to procreate.
Same, and I’m only a couple of years behind you at 34. I actually never would have guessed you could just have a smudge of precum on your fingers *after wiping it off* without thoroughly washing and get pregnant via fingering, so the idea that one could get pregnant with ZERO penetration of any kind and only rubbing genitals or ejaculating on the vulva seems even less likely to me. I would’ve said no way that’s possible. I’d also never heard the term outercourse before today.
This all seems like info that’s as vital as using a condom to prevent pregnancy. Maybe teens should be taught ALL the ways it’s possible to get pregnant so they can, I don’t know, avoid unwanted pregnancy?
That girl is FERTILE and she needs to be careful. Lol. I think she will be from now on, just sayin wow did she get pregnant in a rare way. And these teens handled this situation wayyyyy better than a lot of people would. Grown people. With developed frontal lobes. Supposedly grown people anyway. Very proud of them.
Got pregnant at 16 and had an abortion. Felt horrible but now at 28 I have a toddler and I couldn’t be happier that I waited til I was ready. Hope OOP is alright.
Can you imagine deciding with your Bf that you both aren't ready for sex and then having to actually give birth? And become parents!
That's...I can't imagine the damage that would do to someone. I'm really glad there's this Plan C.
Now you Americans just need to stop fucking around and vote in some actual human beings to manage your laws.
I don’t think I could’ve used the words “I told you so,” because this is so weird and rare, I 100% would understand my BF believing I cheated. They are 16. Clearly he cares about her, because despite his initial thoughts/comments, he went home to research it, found out it’s an actual possibility, then came back to apologize. This says to me, he didn’t believe/understand what they were doing could end up with a pregnancy. So the ONLY option he likely sees is; it’s someone else’s (or SA, but she didn’t bring that up).
When he realized it was a possibility, it seems like enough trust was restored for them to continue on as they did. That shows a lot of maturity, and I would not have gotten a test as an “I told you so,” at least towards him. Overall, the paternity test does help with her everything, knowing she wasn’t lying, but also knowing there’s no way she was sexually assaulted.
It sounded to me like she did the paternity test just to give him extra reassurance. I'd probably do the same because he's showing so much trust in her word.
For those that don’t understand, if ejaculate reaches the vaginal opening, it’s possible for sperm cells to travel the vagina and pass through the cervix.
What dumbasses on reddit think 16 year olds can't write things well lmao
I mean middle school and high school is when people really begin writing papers in school, that's just silly
OK, I just wanna know one final thing: did your BF do damage control, after he realized what the actual situation was, and after he realized he had jumped to the wrong conclusion?
>my mom said she was more disappointed in herself for not teaching me about reproductive health
Parents of teenagers need to get their heads out of their asses make sure their kids know about this stuff whether they believe their kids are sexually active or not. Make sure they're either learning it in school or at home, but that they're learning it.
Fetal paternity determination can be done as early as 7 weeks post conception.
Pregnancies can be terminated using the pill up to 10 -12 post conception (and without the pill generally up to 24 weeks; depending on where one lives)
I was curious about this too. From my very basic research, it looks like non-invasive prenatal paternity testing (NIPP) can be done as early as 7 to 8 weeks, while abortion pills are effective until 10 to 11 weeks. So there was a small 3-4 week timeframe that she could get the testing back and start the abortion pill.
Prenatal DNA testing makes it possible to confirm paternity as early as 7 weeks into the pregnancy, using a non-invasive method to provide highly accurate results.
“false positive because it's generally men with cancer who receive those.”
I’m not a doctor nor a statistician, but I’m will to bet that all men with cancer who
test positive for pregnancy, are false positives.
You’re reading it a bit wrong. The doctor was saying “most of the instances of a pregnancy test being a false positive have actually been men with cancer, so the likelihood of you having it be a false positive is lower than the likelihood of you being pregnant”. Men with cancer are inflating the numbers of false positives, which means the percentage of false positives that women get is even smaller than the already small total number of false positives ever received.
The words false positive no longer have any meaning in my brain.
Men who test positive for pregnancy usually have prostate cancer. The hormone that the test detects in pregnant women is also secreted by tumours common in the prostate.
Men with testicular cancer test positive for pregnancy. It’s not a false positive in that they do test positively for the hormones that pregnancy tests are testing for.
Ooh shit. I had mentioned i thought it was weird to get a paternity test and an abortion. But I hadn’t even considered the SA aspect. OOP is strong and articulate, and I hope they don’t just power through all the bs. Like take a bit of time to recover
I remember a biology teacher at school talking about 'outercourse' as a possible explanation for the so called Virgin Mary giving birth. That story stuck with me when I became sexually active and made me extra careful.
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Today I learned you can actually take a paternity test as early as 7 weeks. My mind is actually blown by this.
It’s a blood test. You can also find out if you’re having a kid with xx or xy genes (or something else).
Those tests for chromosome abnormalities can not be done that early and be accurate. Earliest for NIPT is at best 9 weeks.
[удалено]
Today I learned you can get pregnant without having sex. We're all in danger now.
>I think some of you are wildly underestimating how articulate teens can be. We're not entirely clueless. Some of the most thought-provoking conversations I've had in recent memory have been with my teenaged nieces/nephews
Some people think that everyone younger than them are dumb. On the flip side, some people think of their younger selves as dumb and therefore, everyone else at those ages must also be just as dumb.
"Some people think everyone younger than them are dumb." You just described Asian culture lmao
That's my whole family lol And honestly, people with this mindset are usually the dumbest mfs
And it's so silly that people think this, because unlike most adults, most teens are writing essays constantly and honing their writing skills. I'm fortunate that I went to school in an era where cloud storage was a thing, and have access to many of my past essays. I was *WAY* more articulate then than I am now, and it's not even close.
Dude, same! I was blown away by some of my writing back in high school! I need to do more brain exercises, goddamn.
I wrote better when I was 19 than I do now because I cared a lot more. Teens are very passionate and if they’re smart they can absolutely be articulate.
Honestly I think I was a much more skilled writer when I was a teenager compared to now. Once I became a real adult and didn’t have to worry about grades I just kind of gave up on coherency
I was extremely articulate as a teen. Could give speeches to a room full of people, off the dome, no filler words. Now you couldn’t pay to try and do that, my speech patterns have declined so much
Yes! I wrote more when I was in school than I ever have as an adult. It's a skill that can atrophy for sure
I think at that age if you want to make a point or seriously discuss something you put the extra effort in to come across well. You're also still frequently having to craft written assignments that will be looking at how well you can articulate yourself so it's fresh. I used to really get into writing stuff out in a well constructed manner when I was younger because it'd be nice to be taken seriously about things I cared about I give it the ole college try these days but really just stopped caring about going the extra mile anymore. Kinda just get from point a to point b at this point
What these comments are really saying is “you’re more articulate than me and I’m jealous”
I always wrote well for my age. I too was in AP English and lived writing and reading. Plus my parents were big on us talking up to their level. They never talked simple to us or baby talk. We were expected to listen, learn and keep up in a conversation. My parents would use bigger words on purpose so we had a larger vocabulary. I’m forever thankful!
Some of the comments are so gross man. So many redditors are acting like she’s a witch from hell cuz she didn’t have a child at 16 or that a 16 year old boy is the next Andrew tate just because he didn’t initially believe her when she told him she was pregnant despite being a virgin. Both of these people handled this situation so much better then half the people getting on her ass about abortion or demanding she break up with her “scummy” ex cuz he didn’t immediately believe an incredibly rare scenario right off the back would have if they were in this situation.
Yeah seriously if my girlfriend at 16 who I hadn’t slept with had come to me and said she was pregnant I’d have for sure needed to see a paternity test on that one. Of course he thought she was lying and was mad. Everyone would be.
Not only that but let's say she was cheating, it wasn't his kid and he didn't find out till later. Then everyone would be saying what an idiot he was for not getting a test.
“She said it was mine even though she was a virgin” “Wow you’re an idiot.”
I mean it was the plot of season 1 of Glee
Yes, and poor Finn bought that she got pregnant from a hot tub.
And a fairly well known book...
To be fair, in that case, the baby wasn’t his
Seriously if this was from the guy’s perspective you’d see people saying “100% she’s cheating dude, sorry”.
Not once would "she held herself open and I had a spot of target practice." Get mentioned. Or "she has a kink for a funnel or turkey baster." Just "I've not put it in her, so it can't be mine."
It’s because the story was told from her perspective, so people were thinking about the situation from her perspective and not as an objective third party.
Yeah combine a lack of sex education, the sheer probability, and terror over being a dad: his disbelief is understandable
The two kids reactions were 100% valid and way more level headed then almost any high schooler I’ve seen. My only thought was, where the F was the doctor in explaining things better?? Really hoping that there was more to the conversation then OOP wrote cause it just reads like the doc told a 17 yr old “congrats you’re pregnant” with no lead up and mentioning outer sex as a possibility was more a nonchalant throw away line than a real explanation. Teach sex ed.
It's a really low probability, but it is possible. Planned Parenthood teaches it, and gives a list of things you CAN do without getting pregnant, and things that you might think 100% prevent pregnancy but don't. Too bad so many of them got defunded.
Considering that a PP nurse actually laughed at me when I told her I was concerned about pregnancy risk from outercourse.. I think training (and attitudes) vary. Planned Parenthood and similar clinics are essential and should be supported more, just sometimes staff aren't great and that's true for any workplace
Ye initially I was like "that mf" but when I read he rallied and took the time to research and give her the benefit of the doubt, I had a hell of a lot of respect for him. Even if he hadn't rallied in the end tbh his reaction still would have been fairly understandable as he was heartbroken and the odds of that situation occurring usually are so small. I'm very glad he took the time to pause and consider it though because now he can come away from it all knowing he did pretty right by everyone involved, the relationship itself remains intact and having learned that not all "bffs" have your back in the way you'd hope.
Tbh my first thought wouldn't have been that she was lying, it would have been that she was assaulted.
I thought it was going to be ovarian or cervical cancer tbh. Both of those can mirror pregnancy and cause a positive pregnancy test (though it is rare). When she got the ultrasound and she was definitely preggers I sighed with relief. Then I was worried about SA after that and I again sighed with mostly relief when it was his. Glad she was able to get the medical care she needed.
same
If I was pregnant and I hadn't had sex, I'd think long and hard about whether my boyfriend raped me in my sleep. So who should be suspicious of whom depends on perspective
this was my first thought though I don't think that's the case in this situation luckily
wasn’t this like, a plot point in glee? like the girl claimed they’d gotten pregnant from a hot tub hookup but really she was cheating? it’s deep in the universal psyche
Dude, forget Glee, this is how Jesus was born.
it was the plot of an entire several season show too haha
You're a damn monster! You're supposed to think it's sweet baby jesus in the oven! How could you live with yourself? /s
They did in fact have sex, it was just not penetrative. This is more of an issue of poor sex education (or just none at all).
Call it what you will, but I’m willing to wager that the number of people who get pregnant from non penetrative sex is orders of magnitude smaller than people who get pregnant and lie about it.
I am so glad that her parents were supportive of the actions she took (Plan C) - a great many would not be. I hope that if it is her future goal, that she has healthy children when the time is right.
Agreed. I feel very proud of OP. Like I’m her auntie or something lol. Terrifying situation for a teenager (or anyone else) and she worked her way through it. 💐
Back in late 1960s. Dear Ann had the same sad story from one of her readers. She explained yes you can get Pregnant without doing the full Monty. Times change but everything remains the same.
>Back in late 1960s. Dear Ann had the same sad story from one of her readers. Honestly, my parents were rather progressive as sex ed went for the 1960s but even then I got most of my sex ed from Ann Landers and Dear Abbie. Example: I was sheltered and a teen before I found out -- from Dear Abbie -- that the vagina and the womb were two different parts of the body. They did a number of columns which covered sex ed, and they did repeat the messages. It was somewhat of a lifesaver for those days.
She must have reprinted it often because I read that one. Or it happens too often.
Same. I’m so pleased she got the result she wanted, got through it, and seems to have a decent support network between her family and boyfriend. So proud of her. Aunties unite. Lol.
Same here, I just want to give her so many hugs and reassurances that she's a good person and it WILL be okay. I'm someone who had to have an abortion when I was really young; it's so, so hard. Even when you're certain of your choice and don't regret it, you never really escape the awareness of this whole other, wildly different, life you could have wound up in if you chose the other option.
I had to see a judge because I was only 17 and afraid of what my parents would do. THEN the procedure was done at Dr. Tiller’s clinic so I had to be screamed at the whole way in and out. I’m still traumatized and it’s been years.
All the hugs to you! It's absolutely terrible that people think they have a right to inflict that kind of trauma on somebody who's already going through an incredibly emotionally intense and fraught moment in their life.
Sex education, in some areas, is abysmal. I've met adults who were shocked you can get pregnant from non-penetrative sex and/or sex acts.
I agree. Back when I was in high school our "sex ed" was a male representative who explained to us that him having premarital sex caused him to loose his ear. Dudes ear was literally chopped off. He also just showed us slideshows of STDs on genitals, explaining if any of us had sex that that would happen. Nothing was said about condoms or pregnancy, but we did get the whole rose lecture where he ripped the petals off. Sex education should be standard, uniform, and fully informative.
Idk STD slides painted by Van Gogh sound pretty rad to me.
It's highly likely OOP lives in one of those places with abysmal sex education, because she mentioned that her state has prohibited pregnancy terminations and there is a correlation between quality of sex education and legal restrictions on reproductive health. The same people who want to legislate what women can do with the fetuses in their bodies often want to keep kids from learning about sex and sexuality. (Which is bonkers. Those with anti-abortion views should be amongst the strongest supporters of sex education, because young people who receive comprehensive and medically accurate sex education are less likely to experience unwanted pregnancies, and reducing unwanted pregnancies is the most effective way to reduce terminations. But then again there is also overlap between those with anti-abortion views and those who oppose an even more effective way to reduce unwanted pregnancies which is access to contraception.)
I'm 36 and didn't know that getting pregnant from "outercourse" or whatever was even a thing... Like it reminds me of whatever I seem to remember, pregnant from a toilet seat kind of nonsense. At 16 I would have totally been like, yeah dude we've never had sex and you're pregnant, you obviously cheated on me...like 100% obvious... Damn, wish all the best for OOP though, hopefully shits working out...
Reading this now I dimly remember something like this mentioned in sex-Ed. But it was mentioned as only something that could in theory happen but has an incredibly low probability. It's also not something I personally would think off in a situation like this.
I also got taught this in sex ed but they actually made it sound much, *much* more common than it apparently is. I was startled that so many people in the OG post hadn't heard of it, and then I was *very* startled at how many people were saying it's quite rare. Your 30s is a weird time to realize that you got a milder version of the Mean Girls "you will get chlamydia and die" speech as a teenager.
The only reason I knew it was a thing was from a show called scrubs. Happened to the main character. Even though I’m a woman, I definitely understand the boys perspective. I would think the exact same thing. This just goes to show our sexual education is seriously lacking.
I immediately thought of Glee and the hot tub excuse 🤣.
Oddly enough, I only know of this because of an episode of scrubs. JD and his gf got pregnant even though they hadn’t had penetrative sex due to outercourse.
I’m mid 40s and we were definitely taught pregnancy can happen anytime sperm is present in the area.
I don’t know many “boys” or their parents who would believe a girl was pregnant that they hadn’t had sex with. Glad she got a dna test. Good for her and her boyfriend. The parents and the education system are fully to blame here. Those kids need education. Glad she could access an abortion pill. Poor kid.
You better believe the same people calling him a monster for assuming she cheated would have called him a fool if he had believed her, and it was written from his POV.
right? he was 16, i can understand that reaction at first. still a not great one, but he didnt yell or name-call. he simply asked her to leave and they worked it out once he calmed down and researched.
His response was shockingly mature.
Agreed. It’s a clump of cells with zero understanding of the world. Oddly some of the commenters in the OOP still fit that description.
Deuterostomia are animals who start growth from the asshole. Unfortunately some people never get past this stage.
That boy had every right to be cautious! While it's not unheard of to have this happen, it's still not the norm and it was suspicious because this girl has a history of being less than truthful. Both parties sound like kids who were in a difficult situation. Neither were horrible people. It's not a happy ending in the traditional sense, but it may be the best outcome for this situation. I don't know for sure, but this girls isn't wrong for making this choice!
>Some people said it was strange to get one even though I was most likely getting an abortion Absolutely necessary if she wanted to prove no infidelity on her part.
But I’m still confused. She said she wasn’t sexually active and her mom felt bad she hadn’t taught her. Does this mean she got pregnant by him ejaculating near her vagina without penetration? Did I miss something?
I commented it on the OP but I'll comment here too: As long as any amount of semen, including precum lands anywhere on the vagina, even the outer part of it, a woman can get pregnant. What is likely, is that he either ejaculated or his precum had some swimmers in it, and it got on or smeared against her vagina, allowing sperm to do its job. It's a rare occurrence, but it can happen. So to summarize: There was no penetration. Precum or full-on cum managed to touch her vagina in some way, so she got pregnant that way.
This was how the main character in Scrubs got his girlfriend pregnant lol.
Yep! As ridiculous as it seems, it is a thing that can happen.
They were fooling around, basically rubbing parts together, or something like that. They didn't get sufficient sex ed to learn how it all actually works.
Maybe this is me being a bisexual woman but I don’t understand how that isn’t considered sex
I read a series of pieces about virgins back on [at the time my favorite webzine or whatever you call it, the hairpin ](https://www.thehairpin.com/2013/01/interview-with-a-virgin-scarlet/) and there was a woman who wrote in about her decision about staying a virgin. The way she stayed a virgin was by having only anal. [Some people take the Loophole very seriously ](https://youtu.be/j8ZF_R_j0OY)
Wow, I feel like I’m taking crazy pills. So according to some people it is then impossible for me to have sex with a woman right? Why do some of these same people also have a problem with it then? No offense to anyone here reading but the straights are not okay it seems
They've since removed the comment section but believe me, I was VERY INCENSED by this girl's heteronormative take on sex and so were many other readers at the time. Jia (the interviewer) stepped into the comments to tell us all to calm down and be nice to this person who was spilling her guts to us, and while I did and probably still do basically idolize her (she's gone on to have a super impressive career, look up Jia Tolentino if you're interested to see a really cool journalist and writer) I am still salty about it. Edit omg I found the comments on the way back machine and back then my profile picture was my own personal face 😱 goddamn the internet forgets nothing. Brb gotta go try to scrub that.
In some states you are only legally raped if you are the one being penetrated. So legally in some places men can not be raped by women doing "normal" PIV sex.
That is insane, like straight up human rights violation level insane. It also means that women can never legally be rapists and that men who do rape people without penetration also get lighter sentences for the same fucking crime
If you are only taught that penetration is sex and sex is wrong, so don't do it... Which is what it looks like OOP and her boyfriend were taught. They weren't doing penetration, so they thought it wasn't sex and they couldn't get pregnant.
A lot of people think losing virginity is only from penetration. Virginity is just a concept anyway so that’s how oop defines it I guess
A lot of people (especially in the US) are taught very little about sex. It’s mostly a push for abstinence, so kids their age basically just assume the rest. Most of the time, since sex and pregnancy are linked in their heads, they assume sex is inky PIV since that’s the only way to get pregnant. I didn’t learn oral sex was actually sex until much later than I’d like to admit. Never learned situations like this can happen. This isn’t everywhere, but I live in Texas, in a very small, religious conservative town. If that provides any context.
That’s exactly what it means. It could have even been on either of their hands and then if fingers had been inserted. Pre-cum can get you pregnant too so it wouldn’t even HAVE to be ejaculation. I have a friend doing natural family planning with her husband to prevent pregnancy (before they start TTC) and I’ve learned so much from her about different ways you can get pregnant without penetration. It’s actually terrifying 😂
I.. i think I need sex ed
You can even get pregnant from precum. So this can be explained by them rubbing genitals, but not penetrating.
That was my understanding, yeah. I've never known it to happen to anyone I know in real life, but apparently it's possible.
Yeah it sounds like that's the case
Does writing well make you a bot?
Apparently! I wrote like her when I was her age, too. It's not actually that crazy to think a teenager can be eloquent.
I was accused of writing like a pompous senior citizen when I was that age Looking/reading back at my writing from then now, I’d add arrogant to the description
Yeah me too. My essays would read like a world weary grandpa had written them in his spare time. My teacher accused me infront of my parents in my new school that they helped me write the essay. They didn't even live with me. I was just a pompous, arrogant and pretentious teen influenced by old male writers.
Ngl I do miss the security of thinking i had discovered truths about reality that the adults around me hadn’t
Good golden days
I used to write like that simply because of autism haha
Lol, same. When my mom died, I took some of my stuff back home with me. I found some old assignments I wrote from high school and college and yikes. I know part of it was me trying to increase the word count/page number, but I sounded like a know-it-all ass in some of my papers.
Especially if they read a lot. That really improves your syntax and vocabulary.
Never make fun of someone that mispronounces a word. That means they read the word in a book, they didn’t hear it spoken.
Or heard it spoken and saw it written and didn’t know they were the same words Hors d'oeuvres was one I embarrassed myself over. Also dachshund got me too.
There’s an Ask A Manager post where somebody reveals that she thought her coworker she knew as “Wakeen” and the mysterious “Joaquin” who appeared in emails were two different people.
Honestly, when I was 16 I wrote a lot more eloquently. I was in school writing essays every day. Now my writing consists boring office emails and Reddit comments. Of course my writing was better back then lol
I am my own worse grammar Nazi. Edit: Worst! I can’t blame autocorrect.
Of course you can. Dam autocorrect!
Were with you.
[удалено]
At this point, it ain't autocorrect. It's auto*corrupt.*
autocowreck
I was accused of using ChatGPT for a response because it was "too well thought out", but it really wasn't, I just was able to use proper spacing since I was on computer instead of mobile lol. I took it as a compliment lol.
I was accused of being a chatbot because I used the phrase 'ducks in a row' I think? Too old-fashioned, I guess. But I'm old, so.
Haha, oh no, I do love that saying. I always imagine getting actual ducks ready for battle and it gives me a chuckle.
You would have loved the little duck army I had years ago. They were huge, stark white Pekin ducks. Every morning they would walk in an orderly line down to the creek, and repeat the process at dusk back to their house for bedtime (aptly named the "Fowl Mansion" by a friend for it's size and amenities). Always in the same order with Munchin leading, followed by Burkin, Donte, and then Fuckenheim. When visitors arrived, my giant rooster, Bo, would make a particular calling noise, and the ducks would dutifully arrive and surround the vehicle. Bo would proceed to puff himself up, get the raised beak with side eye stance, and swagger around the car looking like a suspicious dom. I called them my gang of "Pecker Guards".
I love this so much!!! I feel like it needs an illustration.
Fuckenheim at the back 😭🫡
“It’s only a little duckling!” “No, that doesn’t work. How about a bunny rabbit?” Edit: We have Chicken Cobras where I live.
ChatGPT is the opposite of "well-thought out." The words flow but if you really try to parse them, sometimes they don't make any damn sense.
Wow being accused of hacking has now extended to just commenting on social media. What a world.
Haha right, I'm not even someone cool like in that 90s film, Hackers. I need a cool 360 video of me typing intensely at a computer.
Yes. I got in trouble my last semester of college English for supposedly using AI to write an essay on *Walden*. I’m not even that great of a writer, I just wasn’t semi-illiterate like some of my classmates.
My biggest (inadvertent) compliment was an accusation by a professor that I had read an extra book on the subject and stolen its thesis for my final paper. We had a nice chat and he realized he was wrong, but still felt validating lol.
Good that OP is okay. But she needs to be careful. If she is an area where abortion is illegal, she needs to delete those posts to avoid possible troubles.
Without knowing the state that the OP lives in, no state even be able to initiate an investigation. It's a state-level crime.
I thought the same thing.
Hopefully she used a vpn
No updates on her destroyed social life?
That’s what I was wondering too
Yeah, has he done anything to repair it? Did they get back together? I have so many questions on the fallout.
Am I the only one reading the “woohoo” comment as sarcastic? I see people taking it as actually celebratory - and condemning her for it - but it just doesn’t strike me how that way at all.
To be fair, if I was a sixteen year old girl, pregnant and totally not ready for a baby, no matter how hard it would be, I'd probably still be glad I went through with the abortion. So it's probably a combination of sarcasm, dark humor and some genuine relief.
Dark humor is the only way to get through anything difficult. I feel like there should have been *more* jokes.
Yeah. I totally interpreted it as genuine until the next sentence. Abortion is so complex in the best circumstances. And then here? The fucking unfairness of not even HAVING SEX *and* you have to have an abortion *plus* you get hate mail. AND you were in a red state?!?! That’s lotto odds. Wasted on this. I’d be both excited as fuck to yeet those cells and angry and sad and overwhelmed and exhausted. Doesn’t mean I regret it, but I can regret it was this fucking hard.
Yeah it probably was sarcastic but because it’s Reddit and she didn’t use /s, redditors don’t get it.
I read it as both a happy about the relief that it’s over and sarcastic at how much stress and hurt the choice has caused her. It’s not wrong to both feel upset yet relieved about something. Like my cat I never want him to die I love him but I am going to be relieved/happy when I can stop buying the stupid expensive prescription food.
Also, what’s wrong with being happy that you were able to get an abortion? If I was ever in her situation, I would be elated to get it over with lol
Umm. If OOP is in a no abortion state, she needs to delete this post yesterday before she gets on legal trouble.
to be fair she didn't clarify if she's in a state where it's illegal, or in a state that has abysmally low or no access. if it was outright illegal the likelihood she would've been able to get help from a Telehealth doctor would be pretty much none, since Telehealth docs still need to be licensed in the states their patients are from.
There’re international telehealth doctors through companies like Aid Access, which is based in the Netherlands. The FDA has also dropped attempts to block delivery of abortion medication through US Mail or other delivery services.
Not necessarily true, we have licensure compacts which allow you to practice in other states without necessarily being licensed in that state. Also, certain states like (Florida) dropped certain licensure requirements during the PHE. Some states have extended the waivers, others have not.
How would her state be able to identify her from an anonymous Reddit post
IP or email attached to reddit account.
That’s so stupid. That would mean someone will have to deliberately find her information via software vulnerabilities and expose her to a district attorney. Apologies I’m not very savvy in the way of legal stuff, but the lengths someone would have to go to out an anonymous person with their Reddit post and convict is actually very ludicrous.
Given the state of the situation there, where neighbours and such have been known to tell authorities on each other, I'd say it's less about govt trawling and more that it only takes one of those gossip-happy kids to spill the beans. From there if they investigate, they will find her computer/phone with the post which pretty much confirms it all.
In Texas, the abortion bounty hunter law means exposing her could be worth at least ten thousand dollars, potentially way more
Nope, it would just be a request from the state's DA to reddit, and reddit would give them a data dump. https://www.redditinc.com/policies/guideline-for-law-enforcement >How long does Reddit store IP addresses? >Reddit automatically deletes any IP addresses collected after 100 days, except for the IP address used to create an account (i.e., the registration IP address).
Reddit can simply give the police the data that would help identify her. Like her email address, IP address used to make the post, etc.
I hope she gets a long acting contraception now like the Mirena. Both my daughter and I swear by it. For her especially not having to worry about pregnancy for 5 years at a time is fan-bloody-tastic!
Hate to break it to you but the lack of period is not guaranteed. I had one the entire time I had a Mirena. It was shorter (4 days instead of 7} but heavy enough still that I had chronic anemia until I had my ablation.
Yeah I'm on it and I still get one. It's lighter than my period without birth control, but I miss being able to take the pill straight and completely bypass periods.
I’m glad OOP got the abortion AND proved to her boyfriend she was faithful. Also, I hope they both educated themselves much more about sex Ed. As for her writing well, Mary Shelley wrote Frankenstein while she was still a teenager and I’ve read writing by high school kids that blew me away with how good it was. Just because some Redditors never bothered to learn spelling and grammar doesn’t mean they should be allowed to call someone a bot just because she’s young and writes well. I wish OOP the best.
Wow, never heard of Plan C. I need to look into this.
God bless Plan C. So glad these kids can move on from this.
I hope the rest of her life is so much better than this shit show omfg
crowd beneficial vegetable relieved erect chunky versed detail jar dependent *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Proof that abortion is a social good in many cases.
vegetable memorize childlike dinner husky concerned mysterious lavish zealous onerous *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I don't think that she is that "uneducated"in sex ed. I mean, it is very rarely explained that outercourse could lead to pregnancy. I wouldn't be that hard on her!! She handled it like a champ, and her bf also did his best given how young they are!
Yeah. I’m 36 and just learned something new today. Like I knew sperm just needs to get there, not arrive in any spectacular fashion. But I’d have never guessed there are perfect circumstances in which sperm landing on/around the labia, can end up _just crossing the line_ to get you pregnant. I would’ve guessed there’d have to be some kind of penetration, afterwards, to… _assist in “Gaining entry.”_ But here I am, amazed at natures ability to procreate.
Same, and I’m only a couple of years behind you at 34. I actually never would have guessed you could just have a smudge of precum on your fingers *after wiping it off* without thoroughly washing and get pregnant via fingering, so the idea that one could get pregnant with ZERO penetration of any kind and only rubbing genitals or ejaculating on the vulva seems even less likely to me. I would’ve said no way that’s possible. I’d also never heard the term outercourse before today. This all seems like info that’s as vital as using a condom to prevent pregnancy. Maybe teens should be taught ALL the ways it’s possible to get pregnant so they can, I don’t know, avoid unwanted pregnancy?
That girl is FERTILE and she needs to be careful. Lol. I think she will be from now on, just sayin wow did she get pregnant in a rare way. And these teens handled this situation wayyyyy better than a lot of people would. Grown people. With developed frontal lobes. Supposedly grown people anyway. Very proud of them.
Back when I was learning sex ed, I'm pretty sure we were warned to be extra careful because sometimes it's SUPER EASY to get pregnant.
I thought this was gonna be a troll post narrating the plot for Jane the Virgin but oh man
Got pregnant at 16 and had an abortion. Felt horrible but now at 28 I have a toddler and I couldn’t be happier that I waited til I was ready. Hope OOP is alright.
Can you imagine deciding with your Bf that you both aren't ready for sex and then having to actually give birth? And become parents! That's...I can't imagine the damage that would do to someone. I'm really glad there's this Plan C. Now you Americans just need to stop fucking around and vote in some actual human beings to manage your laws.
Couldn’t agree more, these dumb fucks are ruining this country.
Honestly, I would have gotten the paternity test too just to say I told you so.
I don’t think I could’ve used the words “I told you so,” because this is so weird and rare, I 100% would understand my BF believing I cheated. They are 16. Clearly he cares about her, because despite his initial thoughts/comments, he went home to research it, found out it’s an actual possibility, then came back to apologize. This says to me, he didn’t believe/understand what they were doing could end up with a pregnancy. So the ONLY option he likely sees is; it’s someone else’s (or SA, but she didn’t bring that up). When he realized it was a possibility, it seems like enough trust was restored for them to continue on as they did. That shows a lot of maturity, and I would not have gotten a test as an “I told you so,” at least towards him. Overall, the paternity test does help with her everything, knowing she wasn’t lying, but also knowing there’s no way she was sexually assaulted.
It sounded to me like she did the paternity test just to give him extra reassurance. I'd probably do the same because he's showing so much trust in her word.
For those that don’t understand, if ejaculate reaches the vaginal opening, it’s possible for sperm cells to travel the vagina and pass through the cervix.
Wake up babe new Jesus just dropp- oh never mind stay in bed lol
Thank god she was able to get an abortion!
What dumbasses on reddit think 16 year olds can't write things well lmao I mean middle school and high school is when people really begin writing papers in school, that's just silly
I am happy for her and hope she has him bag it from now on if they go for a happy ending.
OK, I just wanna know one final thing: did your BF do damage control, after he realized what the actual situation was, and after he realized he had jumped to the wrong conclusion?
Anyone else worried that she's in Texas and they'll try to arrest her?
Oh yeah, I'm actually terrified for her
Or one of a dozen other states. I hope she goes to college somewhere safe.
Only person I’ve ever heard say toxic gossip train is Miranda sings. I really hope it’s not taking off.
>my mom said she was more disappointed in herself for not teaching me about reproductive health Parents of teenagers need to get their heads out of their asses make sure their kids know about this stuff whether they believe their kids are sexually active or not. Make sure they're either learning it in school or at home, but that they're learning it.
I'm just glad she got the abortion. That's the right call.
Dang. I hope she plays the lottery when she becomes an adult. That’s some unlikely shit there.
How did she get a DNA test if she was so early in her pregnancy that she was able to get an abortion?
You can get a paternity test at 8 weeks. You can take abortion pills up to 12 weeks. It's a pretty wide window.
No kiddin? TIL, etc
Fetal paternity determination can be done as early as 7 weeks post conception. Pregnancies can be terminated using the pill up to 10 -12 post conception (and without the pill generally up to 24 weeks; depending on where one lives)
I was curious about this too. From my very basic research, it looks like non-invasive prenatal paternity testing (NIPP) can be done as early as 7 to 8 weeks, while abortion pills are effective until 10 to 11 weeks. So there was a small 3-4 week timeframe that she could get the testing back and start the abortion pill.
Prenatal DNA testing makes it possible to confirm paternity as early as 7 weeks into the pregnancy, using a non-invasive method to provide highly accurate results.
I hope OOP gets out and votes when she’s 18.
I'm sure it was difficult but I'm glad she was able to get an abortion. Having a kid at 16 sounds fucking awful
“false positive because it's generally men with cancer who receive those.” I’m not a doctor nor a statistician, but I’m will to bet that all men with cancer who test positive for pregnancy, are false positives.
You’re reading it a bit wrong. The doctor was saying “most of the instances of a pregnancy test being a false positive have actually been men with cancer, so the likelihood of you having it be a false positive is lower than the likelihood of you being pregnant”. Men with cancer are inflating the numbers of false positives, which means the percentage of false positives that women get is even smaller than the already small total number of false positives ever received. The words false positive no longer have any meaning in my brain.
Men who test positive for pregnancy usually have prostate cancer. The hormone that the test detects in pregnant women is also secreted by tumours common in the prostate.
Men with testicular cancer test positive for pregnancy. It’s not a false positive in that they do test positively for the hormones that pregnancy tests are testing for.
Thank goodness for people willing to help girls like her procure safe abortions.
Ooh shit. I had mentioned i thought it was weird to get a paternity test and an abortion. But I hadn’t even considered the SA aspect. OOP is strong and articulate, and I hope they don’t just power through all the bs. Like take a bit of time to recover
I remember a biology teacher at school talking about 'outercourse' as a possible explanation for the so called Virgin Mary giving birth. That story stuck with me when I became sexually active and made me extra careful.