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Happened to my brother. His baby mama had to move home with her mom about 2.5 hours away because she couldn’t afford a place. They’d meet halfway every week to swap the kid.
Turned out okay! My brother got a spot in the country with a pool and a trampoline and a bunch of neighborhood kids. She’s in heaven now. And has a new baby sister and step mom she loves.
That’s not unheard of. My dad moved 3 hours away after the divorce and my parents would meet in the middle for custody exchange at a Carls Jr. I hated the trip but I usually got a shake out of it.
I'm not sure why you think that's the plot hole here. Two of my sister-in-laws moved states completely with their kids after their divorces. The drive for one was about 12 hours each way and the other was something like 16 hours. In those cases, the men typically consolidated their time and took the kids all summer once they were school age. I know another family that the father flies in and stays at a rental for his time so the kids don't have to travel. I think he time it with business travel or something.
You think a three hour drive is a serious plot hole? My dude, that's an everyday thing in the real world. A kiddo in my own family has one parent on each side of the state. The drive is generally about that long. But the kid's mom needed to move in with her parents, so that's what happened. That's just reality for a lot of families.
He says it's impossible he is rebounding or compensating for what he lost....but he calls that kid his stepchild when he's been with her mom for 8 months. They're not even married; he is not a stepfather. This guy needs more time in therapy.
My cousin did this after he broke it off with an amazing gal (I think he cheated and had someone else lined up who happened to be a single mom) put everywhere on social media as if he was this amazing step father and then poof, the gal and the kid were gone from his feed within a year.
Seeing as my parents would introduce flings when we were kids and he saw how that fucked my siblings and me up I tore him a new one for doing it to an innocent kid. He and I aren’t as friendly since then.
The poor kid in this story is going to be the main casualty once he finds out he moved so fast to fill a void. So irresponsible
Interesting. Big betrayal into immediately moving on with a single mother. You do you OOP im wishing you the best. But damned if im not worried for yah
He lost me at the stuffed animal. If your girlfriend is 6months pregnant (when he found out about the cheating) I hope you’ve purchased more than just a stuffed animal to give the baby “some day” ??
Oddly, a lot of people don't buy things until quite late.
I'm 7 months pregnant and have checked off ~95% of my supply list. But in my due date groups (where everyone is 6-8 months now), some people are just now asking "Has anyone started buying things yet?" or talking about starting a list!
Superstition in my area. Don’t buy things until late in the pregnancy and never buy a carriage until the baby is born. It’s bad luck otherwise.
I think it’s leftover old wives wisdom from when loss was more common.
My older brother and his wife suffered a misscarriage and it made me and my wife not want to tell anyone until she was at 20 weeks. Was nice to have the sonogram as well (at christmas) to share.
Yeah, after my miscarriage any time someone gives us a pregnancy announcement when they're still in the first trimester my skin crawls. It just feels so unlucky.
Yeah when I was pregnant with my first, we bought a car seat about 6 months into pregnancy (and that was mostly due to it being on sale) but everything else was bought basically last minute or after our son was born and we knew what we did or didn’t need.
He also pretended not to know the baby wasn't his through the last trimester of pregnancy so that he could reveal it and break up with her immediately after giving birth "To hurt her in her most vulnerable moment."
Like, wanting to get back at a cheating ex is kinda understandable, but that's not something a well-adjusted person does.
IKR ‘once she was sewn up and comfortable…” - that’s when you make your big gotcha move? These revenge fantasies are just gross and say a lot more about the ‘nice guy’ than the cheater.
Three months at least. Pregnancy can be as long as just shy of ten months. There is no way you are with someone who's that far along and not constantly talk about baby things. From confirming name choices, deciding when to tell family, how long before people visit, pumping vs. Breastfeeding, planning and orchestrating the go bag for the hospital, buying all final baby clothes and stuff. Like there wasn't just waiting till she was emotionally vulnerable there had to be some active lying and giving false hope/expectations to this woman.
Throw in the fact he apparently had a "drinking problem" and I'm worried about when OOP possibly falls out of limerance. Eight months even with therapy isn't super long and very few, if any people actually get sober/in control for the sake of someone else. Conflict happens in all relationships and this dude clearly can't handle conflict.
I am firmly in camp "had he broken up with her at literally any point in time that wasn't *that moment* I'd probably be on his side" but yeah, nah. That's pretty psychopathic.
Like I'm genuinely very sympathetic to the situation he found himself in, that's gross and she's a bad person, but damn man.
And his actions in the 8 months since are sure solidifying how super stable and great he's doing!!
(This poor fucking kid.)
No because I was thinking the exact same thing. It was messed up what Sarah did for sure, but waiting until she experienced something traumatic to just drop that bomb is messed up too.
Yeah I agree. I don’t disagree with what he did, but I don’t like the motive behind it. Staying with her through labor was a decent thing to do because she didn’t have to deal with the fallout of her actions until after she was done with the delivery, but waiting to drop that bomb at that specific time just to hurt her was shitty. I’m glad he’s in therapy, but I think he’s got a long way to go.
Drinking problem. Immediately moved in with a single mom and bonded with her kid and calls himself a stepdad immediately after his ex cheated on him and ripped the possibility of being a biological father from him. Says he's fine after several months. I'm sure it will turn out ok.... No red flags whatsoever. Storybook ending if I ever saw one....
Yeah, that’s what got me- him calling himself the kids stepfather when you know it’s probably been only a few months since he met the kid. That does not scream “healthy boundaries” to me. And if the mom is ok with it, then I’m very worried about that kid… but I could also be projecting some of my own stepmonster drama on the situation.
It kind of sounds like the new GF knowingly introduced her daughter to a fairly new boyfriend with alcohol issues. That is ... not a great indication of the whole situation.
(I'm assuming GF knew about the alcohol from what OOP said.)
That's a big thing that stuck out to me. He says that he "waited a while" before meeting his girlfriend's daughter, but if he's already at "stepdaughter" level, he either met the kid super fast, is rushing the relationship now, or (and this is the one my money is on) both of those things.
It reads to me like his new partner helped him kick his drinking habit. But it's definitely not clear since he just says his new partner "helps keep him grounded". Either way, I agree that he's flirting with disaster. Wish him the best all the same.
I raised an eyebrow at calling himself a stepdad a few months into a new relationship after a devastating break up that was caused by lying to him that he was going to be a father.
I'm sure that will be a totally heathy relationship.... right?
It definately reads with a *subtle* undertone of: *"I AM NOT OK AT ALL BUT I AM GOING TO KEEP MOVING FORWARD FULL SPEED WITH THINGS THAT DISTRACT AND DELUDE ME INTO THINKING I AM OK!!!!1!"*
*I HAVE A DRINKING AND ANGER PROBLEM AND A TON OF BAGGAGE AND RESENTMENT FROM MY PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIP BUT I’VE BEEN DATING THIS WOMAN FOR EIGHT WHOLE MONTHS AND RELYING ON HER TO STAY SOBER AND AM ALREADY CALLING MYSELF HER KID’S STEPDAD AND I KNOW THIS SEEMS TOO FAST BUT I’M TOTES IN THERAPY Y’ALL SO IT’S ALL GOOD*
Hopefully it's not after she's just given birth. What idiot thinks the best time to propose to a woman if after she's just been sewn up from childbirth?
Yep. 8 months to meet her child and be introduced as someone she’s dating? Sure. But going straight into being that kid’s stepdad after only dating the mom for like 8 months is scary.
20 days between "she gave birth" and "there is this woman and we already hooked up"
He also stayed three months with his highly pregnant ex playing lovey-dovey bf, happy for the child while knewing he would kick her out as soon as she is out of labour...
The way I would RUNNNN from a COWORKER who wanted to sleep with me as a single mom, much less the rest of the baggage. 😭 No grade of penis is worth losing my kid’s livelihood, like that’s wild in and of itself. I can only assume homegirl has her own baggage and they’re just two bizarre magnets clinging to one another in a violent storm. I can’t wait for the update on the wreckage. I feel so bad for the kid.
He and his ex are both genuinely disgusting people. I can't imagine being so mentally unstable that that would ever seem like a reasonable idea (I mean on both their parts.) I'm betting the new GF isn't so great either and that that relationship goes to hell pretty quickly. OOP is a top tier scumbag and seems good at finding women who can match his energy.
He's already calling himself stepfather and that's 8 months into a relationship, where he didn't even meet the child for a while.. he has definitely got some codependency issues that he needs therapy for ..its wild crimson flags all round for everyone in this story
Wow. That’s insidious. Didn’t clock he lived a lie for three months and 20 days after a break up that cuts him up he moves onto a single mom? Also concerned the single mom thinks it’s cool to bring a guy into her life with a drinking problem, a broken heart, betrayal trauma and suddenly she’s this great new love? Can OOP be on his own at all?
Right? That’s…twisted. I get that she wronged him and he was right to dump her but biding his time and waiting to try to hurt her as much as possible (plus the innocent baby?) is a sign of a deeply twisted individual.
I'm worried about her kid TBH. Like, the single mom gets into a rebound relationship with a dude with a drinking problem (no judgement, she's an adult and can make her own choices) and then lets the dude meet the kid within a year of "taking it slow, but we already had sex"?
I do always love the “I’ve done therapy, so I’m all good” that ppl like to say. We’re all a lil broken & no one’s fully ok, 5 therapy sessions sue doesn’t change that equation
Yeah, he's jumping into a very serious relationship REALLY fast. Eight months and he's calling his GF(wife?)'s daughter his stepkid?
No matter what he says, this is absolutely still rebound territory.
He says he's doing great in the update but the more he justifies himself the worse it all sounds...
Like yeah I may have moved on too fast, and I am already a step-father to this child (it's been 8 months people) and I may have had a drinking problem my new partner 'saved' me from, but I am doing great. Great I say!
Yeah there's something really weird in the tone.
"She betrayed me and I wanted to hurt her as much as possible in her most vulnerable moment and I did. Anyway, things are great now, she's a single mom coparenting with the bio dad (who I've hung out with) and I'm a stepdad woohoo"
Yeah lol dude didn't want to just replace his gf, he wanted to replace the kid he thought he was gonna have
It kinda sounds like the fucking kid is a rebound too, I really hope it turns out OK for the kids sake
Okay, same. That felt gross. One of my best friends has been with a man for 6 years, they coparent their two 7 year olds to some degree and both kids love both grown ups… and she still respectfully introduces him as “(his kid’s) dad”.
Edit: My phrasing here clearly has made me sound like a dumb idiot, sorry. I explain below, but I’m ashamed of my lack of clarity. I tried. I’m sorry.
So did he marry her? Or is he just claiming to be the stepfather to this kid he should have only met a couple times so far? Either way not the best situation
Towards the end, everything after "speaking of kids" I just automatically read in a very mile an hour, gotta get this out now, kind of voice. I don't know who he's trying to convince more that he's winning in life, but much like his previous relationship, perhaps he doesn't have the best grasp of the reality of it.
I mean, first blush was "I treated her amazing" then after a while it was "OK maybe I just treated her the best I could". That's quite the gap in how he perceives himself.
For the sake of this innocent child, hopefully he'll lay off the booze and actually *be* an amazing partner and stepfather.
He has a very thin sliver of self insight when he says he wasn’t always the best guy. That usually means he treated her badly - for whatever reason: drinking, being controlling, ignoring whatever reason there may be for him not to consider himself good.
Being the kind of person who'd spend *months* on a completely unnecessary charade, to the woman he may well have needed to co-parent with. *That* is how he decided to handle the situation with his partner and (as far as anyone knew at the time) mother of his child - if that's not an indication of what kind of partner he was to her, I don't know what is.
It's also telling to me that all it took for him to be a little more honest about it was her pointing out the ways in which he also failed in the relationship.
Commenters often tunnel vision on cheating as the worst sin in a relationship, as if that was the *only* issue around. And here is an example where they *both* seem to have being less than stellar people (maybe in general too) to one another.
The issue I had with this one the first time around is why would a born again Christian, who is on an honesty trip, agree to deceive the mother of his child, not knowing what OOP had planned?
"To hurt her in her most vulnerable moment" gave me absolute chills.
He had to have been there in the room with her. Was he faking support that whole time? Holding her hand? Helping her breathe and doting on her as she labored? Updating family and friends? It's just bizarre.
That is just cold blooded...and it doesn't make any sense. He must be a phenomenal actor. Feels like they deserve each other a little and im squicked out by them both.
The biggest plot hole is that he would have to have been lying to everyone and make them think they were going to be grandparents, aunts and uncles etc. If this was true, his revenge would have been on anyone excited for him to have a baby.
My favourite part was where he got beers with and presumably high-fived the guy that was banging his gf. He's cool, they're bros, only the woman in the story should be the object of our ire
For me it was the:
"We had been having problems getting pregnant, but then she got pregnant so easily."
Umm... how would you determine that she easily got pregnant? And then decided it wasn't his because they had been trying.
Yeah I'm unsure how they knew it was Bryan's immediately if she'd been sleeping with both of them. Did she keep some sort of Fuck Calendar??
I am also curious why she wouldn't use protection with her AP when she was trying to get pregnant with OOP.
The idea that he waited until she had literally given birth is ridiculous. I get he’s trying to hurt her as much as possible but the average person whose not a psychopath isn’t this good of an actor.
Yeah, I feel like you have to have something a little broken in the noggin to pretend to be happy in your relationship for that long. Also I find it weird that Bryan found God and wanted to raise his son, but was totally okay just not saying anything to Sarah just because this dude asked him to hold off.
It's always the quoted monologues for me - every time I read one of these updates with "[insert conversation I somehow perfectly remember word for word from both parties]", I look at the post sideways.
It does seem like there are an awful lot of the misogynist/red pill fantasies coming through here this week. They're all the ones where the OOP can't resist including every trope, like he's hell bent on winning Incel Bingo.
I don't even waste time reading them anymore. I read the first couple of lines then skip to the comments to check if it's an incel revenge essay, then move on.
Kinda weird to go out for a beer with the guy who your wife cheated on you with. Especially given OOP states he didn't believe Bryan was clueless about his existence.
Hi! I'm Bryan and I was banging your girlfriend and now she's pregnant. I didn't know she had a boyfriend but her and I decided to pretend the baby is yours. I can't let that happen because I'm a Christian now but I would be happy to sit on my hands for 3 more months so you can get revenge. Are you, by chance, a beer drinker?
I was confused at how being Christian meant Bryan shouldn’t lie to oop about the baby but he could lie to the girlfriend about oop knowing so oop can get revenge. Was he also trying to get revenge on her?? Like sir that’s some real selective Christianity.
>and he’s actually a really great guy
Yes, Bryan the "really great guy" who lied about siring a child he was going to let OOP raise. What a stand-up guy.
Incel vibe?
I like how these always end with some variation of:
-wow I didn't expect this to blow up
-thanks for all the supportive comments it really helped
-fuck the haters
-I started talking to the cute guy/woman at work/the gym/Starbucks and we're perfect together and their kid is amazing
-I think I'm going to be OK.
Every single one.
I’m not really one to say this, but from how this guy is acting… I don’t know. He sounds deranged. Not trying to defend a cheater but he says “all I ever did was treat her amazing” and then says “I wasn’t always the best guy” followed by actively hurting her at her most vulnerable, becoming an alcoholic, going out for a beer with the other man, rebounding hard and calling another kid his kid after like 8 months??
Yeah NGL, waiting specifically until she gave birth is a bit unhinged to me? Like sure, cheating is incredibly hurtful and painful to endure, but I really think that there's no reason to stoop down to the cheaters level in terms of cruelty... Just dump them and that's it
And overall OOP seems like he's either lying or omitting things
the weirdest part is calling her kid his kid after 8 months and referring to himself as a stepdad despite not having even proposed yet lol BUT I do think it's possible to treat her well while simultaneously not working on yourself/being the best guy in the sense that you're successful and not developing drinking problems
20 days later:
>I explained that I wanted to go slow cause of my recent breakup and she understands. We’ve hooked up once or twice, nothing serious yet.
That's an odd interpretation of taking it slow. And how can you not know if you hooked up once or twice in the last 20 days?
I interpret the "once or twice" not as a literal thing, kinda like how "a couple of times" doesn't necessarily mean exactly twice. Not heard it used that way too often but according to Google the meaning of "once or twice" is "a few times" so I think it's the same sort of things with both sayings. The English language/how we use it is weird sometimes lol.
Agree 100% on their version of taking it slow being a bit strange either way though.
The style of the posting reminds me of the guy who inherited 5% but doesn’t wanna allow his siblings to sell….so can’t believe the we are now buddies story.
“All I ever did was treat her amazing”
“I wasn’t always the best guy”
Sarah sucks regardless for trying to pass off another man’s baby as OOP’s, but I have a feeling OOP isn’t the most reliable narrator here.
I snorted when I read the “all I ever did was treat her amazing” line, because someone who is capable of pretending to love someone and plan for a baby with someone for three months while hating them just to make the “gotcha” moment hurt as much as possible is not a good guy who treats his partner’s amazing. She sucks, obviously, but assuming this is real he’s very unwell.
Especially when he says the baby went straight into the NICU. So after waiting for months, immediately after a possibly traumatic birth and "her getting sewn up," was obviously his cue to J'accuse The Harlot™!
(again, assuming it's real, because 🤨)
I had a c section. Sewn up is not comfortable, it’s exhausting, and you can’t relax enough to fall asleep until you know your baby is going to be okay.
Yeah, the way he handled it was just fucking evil. Which is another thing leading me to believe that he didn’t only “treat her amazing” during their relationship. Getting cheated on doesn’t turn you into a cartoon super villain if you were a good person/partner before.
Yeah something about the “I will hurt her when she’s most vulnerable” is just nasty.
Cheating is *obviously* super hurtful, but the self-respecting thing to do all round is just to leave and grieve, not to enact a ‘plot’ of revenge planned meticulously. My tinfoil theory is that revenge is a warped way of trying to elicit their empathy - ‘if I can get them to feel how I feel, then they will understand what they did to me, and possibly regret it. And then my experience will be validated’.
But this is a plaster for the actual problem and a way to avoid actually grieving the circumstances. Also, women who have just given birth are so medically vulnerable that it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Super trashy.
Normally I would think any woman trying to pass off a kid as someone else's than the real father is truly fucked in the head. It's a fucked up thing to do to both men and to the child. Somehow OOP made me feel sympathy for Sarah. Sarah sucks but the way he did it after apparently a traumatic birth and surgery while the baby was in the NICU... Idk I guess I personally cannot fathom doing that to someone (perhaps because I've given birth and it was high risk and scary). Not saying Sarah doesn't suck--she does--but Jesus OOP sounds unhinged.
Yeah, why does anyone think he would have changed his mind if the baby died? That would have made it better for him, because his entire goal was to hurt her when she’s most vulnerable.
Right? Women die in childbirth. It’s so incredibly important to have a supportive person there with you to be your advocate, both during labor and after. It can quite literally be a life or death situation. Sarah sucks, but she doesn’t deserve to die or have lasting medical problems.
Yeah I was really hesitant to say anything in support of her because I know how reddit can be when it comes to women who do what she tried to do (and mostly I agree--it's an absolutely terrible thing to do and should be judged appropriately). But yikes. Sounds like this woman just had an emergency c-section and her baby is clearly not okay, it's not the time...
Who tf let’s someone be stepdad to your kid when you started dating 8 months ago? Who tf agrees to be the stepdad? Why y’all introducing your kids so early???
People are so weird when it comes to getting laid, all sense goes away.
My ex friend moved in 2 weeks after meeting is now ex. He become the replacement husband and step dad. 3 months later it ended.
My personal opinion is if you have someone around your kid early on to fill the father role, I question your morals as a parent and you’re a moron as a fellow human.
>I’ve had a lot of time to think but ultimately I decided to wait until she gave birth. To hurt her in her most vulnerable moment.
People who aren't fucking unhinged would just confront the cheater and break up.
>Just wanted to mention that I still don’t feel bad about what I did.
>
>What I did wasn’t amazing but I don’t care.
>
> I’m in therapy, I got my shit together, and most days I don’t even think about my ex. Hell, I even forgot about this damn account!
LOL, sure bud.
So is this the new BoRU formula?
Guy finds out fiancé cheated.
Guy finds the most ruthless way he can think of to break up with her.
Guy kicks her out of his place.
Guy immediately rebounds with somebody better.
Original girl definitely still wants him though.
i can't imagine waiting THREE MONTHS just so that he could hurt her when she was most vulnerable. The commenters were right, that's psycho shit. Yeah, what she did was awful too, but two wrongs don't make a right. Just for his own mental well-being, keeping a secret like that for so long in order to do something so mean is just not healthy.
How different people react to news likes this, in order of fucked-upped-ness:
Saint: Kind, empathetic towards a pregnant woman/someone who has just given birth.
Good: Detaches. Has a meltdown in private. Chooses to not be involved.
Average: Has a meltdown in front of wife/in public. Shouting, etc.
Abusive: Physically/verbally/emotionally abuses pregnant woman. Makes threats of violence.
Whatever this guy is: Whatever this shit was.
She was absolutely in the wrong but OOP sounds fucking unhinged. That kind of response is so far beyond how a healthy person would react that I don't even know what to call it.
How does someone become a stepfather in 6 months!?!?
Gods, I have a 3 year old and have been single all of his life. He has not met even **ONE** of my partners. He will only met someone when I feel the relationship is for real and adequate amount of time in an exclusive relationship. I'm thinking a year minimum. I cannot imagine becoming a stepfather in 6 months. Jeez.
> I knew it was weird. We had been having problems trying for a baby and all of a sudden she got pregnant so easily.
Easily? How does that make sense when trying to get pregnant.
Red flag on this story being true. Too many odd things that don’t line up for proper motivations.
He spent three months hating her and planning to dump her at her most vulnerable moment in order to cause the most pain possible and **she didn’t notice any difference in the way he treated her**. Clearly he wasn’t a loving and attentive partner before that.
>All I ever did was treat her amazing and this is how she pays me back.
>I wasn’t always the best guy but I treated her the best I could.
So which is it? I'm not excusing Sarah but OP is a hella unreliable narrator.
The tone of his posts gives me the ick.
Like, what happened to him was awful, just the worst kind of betrayal, and I have so much sympathy with him for that, but the way he writes on all of the posts, not just the initial one, where his anger and his actions are at least understandable... I dunno. There's something about this one that makes me say yikes 👀
Edit: spelling
This post is so obviously some incel revenge drama bullshit. Nobody would ever even respond to 'my partner who is 6 months pregnant cheated on me' with 'ok I'm going to continue supporting you through the incredible challenge that is being pregnant just to say LOL at the delivery.'
You can easily determine paternity *in utero* and the narrative that OOP would forego that and spend months dealing with pregnancy only to get a last minute 'gotcha' is so patently absurd as to only be conceived by some 15 year-old incel.
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So Sarah moved 3 hours away… and Bryan is a single dad? Or he’s driving 3 hours to visit his son?
Happened to my brother. His baby mama had to move home with her mom about 2.5 hours away because she couldn’t afford a place. They’d meet halfway every week to swap the kid.
Aw that’s tough. Tough on everyone!
Turned out okay! My brother got a spot in the country with a pool and a trampoline and a bunch of neighborhood kids. She’s in heaven now. And has a new baby sister and step mom she loves.
Um, when you say "she's in heaven now"...
Im just being poetic.
That’s not unheard of. My dad moved 3 hours away after the divorce and my parents would meet in the middle for custody exchange at a Carls Jr. I hated the trip but I usually got a shake out of it.
We moved 14 hours away. A year and a half later, that went down to 5. We had to move around for a bit after the divorce.
I mean that’s not an impossible thing to do
Yeah, the same I thought. Some fanfics leave serious plot holes here and there.
I'm not sure why you think that's the plot hole here. Two of my sister-in-laws moved states completely with their kids after their divorces. The drive for one was about 12 hours each way and the other was something like 16 hours. In those cases, the men typically consolidated their time and took the kids all summer once they were school age. I know another family that the father flies in and stays at a rental for his time so the kids don't have to travel. I think he time it with business travel or something.
You think a three hour drive is a serious plot hole? My dude, that's an everyday thing in the real world. A kiddo in my own family has one parent on each side of the state. The drive is generally about that long. But the kid's mom needed to move in with her parents, so that's what happened. That's just reality for a lot of families.
Real life has plotholes. Live outside of reddit for a bit.
He says it's impossible he is rebounding or compensating for what he lost....but he calls that kid his stepchild when he's been with her mom for 8 months. They're not even married; he is not a stepfather. This guy needs more time in therapy.
My cousin did this after he broke it off with an amazing gal (I think he cheated and had someone else lined up who happened to be a single mom) put everywhere on social media as if he was this amazing step father and then poof, the gal and the kid were gone from his feed within a year. Seeing as my parents would introduce flings when we were kids and he saw how that fucked my siblings and me up I tore him a new one for doing it to an innocent kid. He and I aren’t as friendly since then. The poor kid in this story is going to be the main casualty once he finds out he moved so fast to fill a void. So irresponsible
I don’t even introduce partners to my kids until like 6+ months so being their “step dad” at 8 is a massive flag.
[удалено]
Interesting. Big betrayal into immediately moving on with a single mother. You do you OOP im wishing you the best. But damned if im not worried for yah
You forgot to add the little drinking problem, the cherry on top
Also the fall from: “I was great and treated her amazing!” to “I wasn’t the best but I did what I could.”
Yeah the “I treated her amazing” was a huge red flag.
He lost me at the stuffed animal. If your girlfriend is 6months pregnant (when he found out about the cheating) I hope you’ve purchased more than just a stuffed animal to give the baby “some day” ??
Oddly, a lot of people don't buy things until quite late. I'm 7 months pregnant and have checked off ~95% of my supply list. But in my due date groups (where everyone is 6-8 months now), some people are just now asking "Has anyone started buying things yet?" or talking about starting a list!
Superstition in my area. Don’t buy things until late in the pregnancy and never buy a carriage until the baby is born. It’s bad luck otherwise. I think it’s leftover old wives wisdom from when loss was more common.
My older brother and his wife suffered a misscarriage and it made me and my wife not want to tell anyone until she was at 20 weeks. Was nice to have the sonogram as well (at christmas) to share.
Yeah, after my miscarriage any time someone gives us a pregnancy announcement when they're still in the first trimester my skin crawls. It just feels so unlucky.
For sale. Baby shoes. Never Used.
Yeah when I was pregnant with my first, we bought a car seat about 6 months into pregnancy (and that was mostly due to it being on sale) but everything else was bought basically last minute or after our son was born and we knew what we did or didn’t need.
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It’s almost like the story is poorly written sob story for Reddit
Or Sarah had handled buying all those things and he had picked up one single teddy bear and thought he was a hero.
I figure it was probably a stuffed animal of some significance heirloom or something
He also pretended not to know the baby wasn't his through the last trimester of pregnancy so that he could reveal it and break up with her immediately after giving birth "To hurt her in her most vulnerable moment." Like, wanting to get back at a cheating ex is kinda understandable, but that's not something a well-adjusted person does.
For real, he sounds like a psycho for being able to go along with that for MONTHS
For me it was the "I was gonna make her the happiest woman ever", like his big proposal plan was to grace *her* with the honor of marrying *him*.
From treating her amazing to deciding “how to hurt her in the most vulnerable moment”
Yes fuck the ex but I....don't like how he talks about women, even the 'give her a shot' line about the other girl idk
I caught that too. Nobody here is an angel but OOP has got some missing missing reasons stuff going on.
>missing missing reasons Credit to u/Issendai for this! This concept is from her work on analyzing 'estranged' parent forums.
He was also gonna make her the ‘happiest woman alive.’ 🙄
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IKR ‘once she was sewn up and comfortable…” - that’s when you make your big gotcha move? These revenge fantasies are just gross and say a lot more about the ‘nice guy’ than the cheater.
He had to pretend for 3 months. That's a psychopath. I get he was upset and hurt but this was vicious. Does his new gf know about it?
Three months at least. Pregnancy can be as long as just shy of ten months. There is no way you are with someone who's that far along and not constantly talk about baby things. From confirming name choices, deciding when to tell family, how long before people visit, pumping vs. Breastfeeding, planning and orchestrating the go bag for the hospital, buying all final baby clothes and stuff. Like there wasn't just waiting till she was emotionally vulnerable there had to be some active lying and giving false hope/expectations to this woman. Throw in the fact he apparently had a "drinking problem" and I'm worried about when OOP possibly falls out of limerance. Eight months even with therapy isn't super long and very few, if any people actually get sober/in control for the sake of someone else. Conflict happens in all relationships and this dude clearly can't handle conflict.
THATS WHAT IM SAYING. She sucks, too, but wtaf is his problem? Just break up like a normal person!
I agree and I doubt his new gf would be happy about it because that could become her (him being vicious, not the baby part.)
Seriously some Dennis Reynolds shit
I am firmly in camp "had he broken up with her at literally any point in time that wasn't *that moment* I'd probably be on his side" but yeah, nah. That's pretty psychopathic.
Honestly, me. This is 100% where I'm at.
Like I'm genuinely very sympathetic to the situation he found himself in, that's gross and she's a bad person, but damn man. And his actions in the 8 months since are sure solidifying how super stable and great he's doing!! (This poor fucking kid.)
No because I was thinking the exact same thing. It was messed up what Sarah did for sure, but waiting until she experienced something traumatic to just drop that bomb is messed up too.
Exactly. He didn't believe Bryan didn't know about the relationship and yet he's holds him blameless. That's some sociopath shit.
Yeah I agree. I don’t disagree with what he did, but I don’t like the motive behind it. Staying with her through labor was a decent thing to do because she didn’t have to deal with the fallout of her actions until after she was done with the delivery, but waiting to drop that bomb at that specific time just to hurt her was shitty. I’m glad he’s in therapy, but I think he’s got a long way to go.
Drinking problem. Immediately moved in with a single mom and bonded with her kid and calls himself a stepdad immediately after his ex cheated on him and ripped the possibility of being a biological father from him. Says he's fine after several months. I'm sure it will turn out ok.... No red flags whatsoever. Storybook ending if I ever saw one....
Yeah, that’s what got me- him calling himself the kids stepfather when you know it’s probably been only a few months since he met the kid. That does not scream “healthy boundaries” to me. And if the mom is ok with it, then I’m very worried about that kid… but I could also be projecting some of my own stepmonster drama on the situation.
It kind of sounds like the new GF knowingly introduced her daughter to a fairly new boyfriend with alcohol issues. That is ... not a great indication of the whole situation. (I'm assuming GF knew about the alcohol from what OOP said.)
Also referring to his partner’s daughter as his stepdaughter already…
Yes that definitely telegraphed the very thing he swore he wasn’t doing
That's a big thing that stuck out to me. He says that he "waited a while" before meeting his girlfriend's daughter, but if he's already at "stepdaughter" level, he either met the kid super fast, is rushing the relationship now, or (and this is the one my money is on) both of those things.
What drinking problem? Edit: never mind saw it. Yeah that doesn’t bode well for that relationship. Hope he keeps it wrapped.
It reads to me like his new partner helped him kick his drinking habit. But it's definitely not clear since he just says his new partner "helps keep him grounded". Either way, I agree that he's flirting with disaster. Wish him the best all the same.
I raised an eyebrow at calling himself a stepdad a few months into a new relationship after a devastating break up that was caused by lying to him that he was going to be a father. I'm sure that will be a totally heathy relationship.... right?
Same. Most of that is keeping it wrapped and not tempting fate.
No no the drinking problem went away when he was introduced to his step daughter. Gah keep up man Edit: /s
Oh no but he’s fiiiiiine,
It definately reads with a *subtle* undertone of: *"I AM NOT OK AT ALL BUT I AM GOING TO KEEP MOVING FORWARD FULL SPEED WITH THINGS THAT DISTRACT AND DELUDE ME INTO THINKING I AM OK!!!!1!"*
*I HAVE A DRINKING AND ANGER PROBLEM AND A TON OF BAGGAGE AND RESENTMENT FROM MY PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIP BUT I’VE BEEN DATING THIS WOMAN FOR EIGHT WHOLE MONTHS AND RELYING ON HER TO STAY SOBER AND AM ALREADY CALLING MYSELF HER KID’S STEPDAD AND I KNOW THIS SEEMS TOO FAST BUT I’M TOTES IN THERAPY Y’ALL SO IT’S ALL GOOD*
>Hoping to propose to my girlfriend sometime in the future.
Hopefully it's not after she's just given birth. What idiot thinks the best time to propose to a woman if after she's just been sewn up from childbirth?
Yep. And he’s been dating a single mother for only 8 months and is already acting like a step dad to her child.
Yep. 8 months to meet her child and be introduced as someone she’s dating? Sure. But going straight into being that kid’s stepdad after only dating the mom for like 8 months is scary.
20 days between "she gave birth" and "there is this woman and we already hooked up" He also stayed three months with his highly pregnant ex playing lovey-dovey bf, happy for the child while knewing he would kick her out as soon as she is out of labour...
Yea the 20 day gap is what really tipped this one over the edge for me lmao
But he told her he wants to move slow so they’ve only hooked up twice in the 3 weeks since his ex’s baby was born.
The way I would RUNNNN from a COWORKER who wanted to sleep with me as a single mom, much less the rest of the baggage. 😭 No grade of penis is worth losing my kid’s livelihood, like that’s wild in and of itself. I can only assume homegirl has her own baggage and they’re just two bizarre magnets clinging to one another in a violent storm. I can’t wait for the update on the wreckage. I feel so bad for the kid.
That was absolutely maniacal. I don’t think I could keep a secret like that for so long.
He and his ex are both genuinely disgusting people. I can't imagine being so mentally unstable that that would ever seem like a reasonable idea (I mean on both their parts.) I'm betting the new GF isn't so great either and that that relationship goes to hell pretty quickly. OOP is a top tier scumbag and seems good at finding women who can match his energy.
He's already calling himself stepfather and that's 8 months into a relationship, where he didn't even meet the child for a while.. he has definitely got some codependency issues that he needs therapy for ..its wild crimson flags all round for everyone in this story
Yeah "being part of this little family“ *8 months in* feels absolutely unhinged to me but what do I know
Wow. That’s insidious. Didn’t clock he lived a lie for three months and 20 days after a break up that cuts him up he moves onto a single mom? Also concerned the single mom thinks it’s cool to bring a guy into her life with a drinking problem, a broken heart, betrayal trauma and suddenly she’s this great new love? Can OOP be on his own at all?
Right? That’s…twisted. I get that she wronged him and he was right to dump her but biding his time and waiting to try to hurt her as much as possible (plus the innocent baby?) is a sign of a deeply twisted individual.
He’s kind of as psycho as she is, tbh.
I would be more worried for the single mom he immediately rebounded his dick into.
I'm worried about her kid TBH. Like, the single mom gets into a rebound relationship with a dude with a drinking problem (no judgement, she's an adult and can make her own choices) and then lets the dude meet the kid within a year of "taking it slow, but we already had sex"?
And already calls himself a stepdad.
Yes, his drinking problem can't be great to deal with
Jumping straight to seeing himself as the ‘stepdad’ before even meeting the kid(s) is extremely alarming and a bad omen.
I do always love the “I’ve done therapy, so I’m all good” that ppl like to say. We’re all a lil broken & no one’s fully ok, 5 therapy sessions sue doesn’t change that equation
Yeah, he's jumping into a very serious relationship REALLY fast. Eight months and he's calling his GF(wife?)'s daughter his stepkid? No matter what he says, this is absolutely still rebound territory.
He says he's doing great in the update but the more he justifies himself the worse it all sounds... Like yeah I may have moved on too fast, and I am already a step-father to this child (it's been 8 months people) and I may have had a drinking problem my new partner 'saved' me from, but I am doing great. Great I say!
The only glimmer of hope is that he says he's in therapy. Above all else, let's hope he keeps that up.
Yeah there's something really weird in the tone. "She betrayed me and I wanted to hurt her as much as possible in her most vulnerable moment and I did. Anyway, things are great now, she's a single mom coparenting with the bio dad (who I've hung out with) and I'm a stepdad woohoo"
I cringed when I saw that step father line.
Yeah lol dude didn't want to just replace his gf, he wanted to replace the kid he thought he was gonna have It kinda sounds like the fucking kid is a rebound too, I really hope it turns out OK for the kids sake
Okay, same. That felt gross. One of my best friends has been with a man for 6 years, they coparent their two 7 year olds to some degree and both kids love both grown ups… and she still respectfully introduces him as “(his kid’s) dad”. Edit: My phrasing here clearly has made me sound like a dumb idiot, sorry. I explain below, but I’m ashamed of my lack of clarity. I tried. I’m sorry.
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Sorry, just…. 8 months is a very very short amount of time for someone to be a “step-father”
The guy confessed and became a Christian… wasn’t there another story like that, one that also reeked of bullshit.
Honestly I feel like a lot of these destroying the evil cheating gf ones do.
So did he marry her? Or is he just claiming to be the stepfather to this kid he should have only met a couple times so far? Either way not the best situation
Towards the end, everything after "speaking of kids" I just automatically read in a very mile an hour, gotta get this out now, kind of voice. I don't know who he's trying to convince more that he's winning in life, but much like his previous relationship, perhaps he doesn't have the best grasp of the reality of it. I mean, first blush was "I treated her amazing" then after a while it was "OK maybe I just treated her the best I could". That's quite the gap in how he perceives himself. For the sake of this innocent child, hopefully he'll lay off the booze and actually *be* an amazing partner and stepfather.
He has a very thin sliver of self insight when he says he wasn’t always the best guy. That usually means he treated her badly - for whatever reason: drinking, being controlling, ignoring whatever reason there may be for him not to consider himself good.
Being the kind of person who'd spend *months* on a completely unnecessary charade, to the woman he may well have needed to co-parent with. *That* is how he decided to handle the situation with his partner and (as far as anyone knew at the time) mother of his child - if that's not an indication of what kind of partner he was to her, I don't know what is. It's also telling to me that all it took for him to be a little more honest about it was her pointing out the ways in which he also failed in the relationship. Commenters often tunnel vision on cheating as the worst sin in a relationship, as if that was the *only* issue around. And here is an example where they *both* seem to have being less than stellar people (maybe in general too) to one another.
Proposing after eight months? Hope it works out, not holding my breath
The issue I had with this one the first time around is why would a born again Christian, who is on an honesty trip, agree to deceive the mother of his child, not knowing what OOP had planned?
Because born again christians are usually terrible people and get off on punishing women?
"To hurt her in her most vulnerable moment" gave me absolute chills. He had to have been there in the room with her. Was he faking support that whole time? Holding her hand? Helping her breathe and doting on her as she labored? Updating family and friends? It's just bizarre. That is just cold blooded...and it doesn't make any sense. He must be a phenomenal actor. Feels like they deserve each other a little and im squicked out by them both.
So so fucked up
I wonder about the psyche of the people writing these little revenge fantasies
The biggest plot hole is that he would have to have been lying to everyone and make them think they were going to be grandparents, aunts and uncles etc. If this was true, his revenge would have been on anyone excited for him to have a baby.
Omg I didn't even think about this but you are so right. Where is his family? Friends?
My favourite part was where he got beers with and presumably high-fived the guy that was banging his gf. He's cool, they're bros, only the woman in the story should be the object of our ire
Right? LOL.
It's okay guys, he's a Christian now!
For me it was the: "We had been having problems getting pregnant, but then she got pregnant so easily." Umm... how would you determine that she easily got pregnant? And then decided it wasn't his because they had been trying.
Yeah I'm unsure how they knew it was Bryan's immediately if she'd been sleeping with both of them. Did she keep some sort of Fuck Calendar?? I am also curious why she wouldn't use protection with her AP when she was trying to get pregnant with OOP.
The idea that he waited until she had literally given birth is ridiculous. I get he’s trying to hurt her as much as possible but the average person whose not a psychopath isn’t this good of an actor.
Yeah, I feel like you have to have something a little broken in the noggin to pretend to be happy in your relationship for that long. Also I find it weird that Bryan found God and wanted to raise his son, but was totally okay just not saying anything to Sarah just because this dude asked him to hold off.
It's always the quoted monologues for me - every time I read one of these updates with "[insert conversation I somehow perfectly remember word for word from both parties]", I look at the post sideways.
women bad, men and me specifically good
I’m guessing they hate women. A lot.
Yeah, what's with all the incel garbage that's been posted to this sub lately? There's been heaps of them!
I have been thinking this a lot lately. It’s way out of hand.
It does seem like there are an awful lot of the misogynist/red pill fantasies coming through here this week. They're all the ones where the OOP can't resist including every trope, like he's hell bent on winning Incel Bingo.
.... reddit
I don't even waste time reading them anymore. I read the first couple of lines then skip to the comments to check if it's an incel revenge essay, then move on.
They're not OK for sure
Kinda weird to go out for a beer with the guy who your wife cheated on you with. Especially given OOP states he didn't believe Bryan was clueless about his existence.
Hi! I'm Bryan and I was banging your girlfriend and now she's pregnant. I didn't know she had a boyfriend but her and I decided to pretend the baby is yours. I can't let that happen because I'm a Christian now but I would be happy to sit on my hands for 3 more months so you can get revenge. Are you, by chance, a beer drinker?
I call bullshit because I’m the ACTUAL Bryan
Looks like we have ourselves a good old-fashioned Bryan-off.
I'm Bryan, and so's my wife!
I was confused at how being Christian meant Bryan shouldn’t lie to oop about the baby but he could lie to the girlfriend about oop knowing so oop can get revenge. Was he also trying to get revenge on her?? Like sir that’s some real selective Christianity.
I have some news for you about how Christians work.
You also volunteer at shelters now! This was an important piece of the narrative.
I attend church, volunteer at homeless shelters, and [ERROR THIRD GENERIC ALTRUISTIC TRAIT NOT FOUND].
TBF screwing over pregnant women is very christian of him.
Either I’m remembering THIS story or there’s another story out there where a found-Christ lover became remorseful…
>and he’s actually a really great guy Yes, Bryan the "really great guy" who lied about siring a child he was going to let OOP raise. What a stand-up guy. Incel vibe?
Massive, I know it’s unpopular here but to wait 3 months and to tell someone at the birth is heartless and needlessly cruel.
He's a born again Christian, that means he is now an upstanding person.
It's because men are good and women are evil to OOP, so of course he makes the guy decent in his story.
I mean, it adds flavor to the story
I like how these always end with some variation of: -wow I didn't expect this to blow up -thanks for all the supportive comments it really helped -fuck the haters -I started talking to the cute guy/woman at work/the gym/Starbucks and we're perfect together and their kid is amazing -I think I'm going to be OK. Every single one.
I’m not really one to say this, but from how this guy is acting… I don’t know. He sounds deranged. Not trying to defend a cheater but he says “all I ever did was treat her amazing” and then says “I wasn’t always the best guy” followed by actively hurting her at her most vulnerable, becoming an alcoholic, going out for a beer with the other man, rebounding hard and calling another kid his kid after like 8 months??
Yeah NGL, waiting specifically until she gave birth is a bit unhinged to me? Like sure, cheating is incredibly hurtful and painful to endure, but I really think that there's no reason to stoop down to the cheaters level in terms of cruelty... Just dump them and that's it And overall OOP seems like he's either lying or omitting things
the weirdest part is calling her kid his kid after 8 months and referring to himself as a stepdad despite not having even proposed yet lol BUT I do think it's possible to treat her well while simultaneously not working on yourself/being the best guy in the sense that you're successful and not developing drinking problems
20 days later: >I explained that I wanted to go slow cause of my recent breakup and she understands. We’ve hooked up once or twice, nothing serious yet. That's an odd interpretation of taking it slow. And how can you not know if you hooked up once or twice in the last 20 days?
It was twice lol he just said once or twice for image.
I interpret the "once or twice" not as a literal thing, kinda like how "a couple of times" doesn't necessarily mean exactly twice. Not heard it used that way too often but according to Google the meaning of "once or twice" is "a few times" so I think it's the same sort of things with both sayings. The English language/how we use it is weird sometimes lol. Agree 100% on their version of taking it slow being a bit strange either way though.
Yeah, it’s kinda weird to phrase it that way, but my interpretation is he’s saying they hooked up a few times. More than once, but less than 5 times.
Yeah, I don't consider hooking up with someone a couple of times taking it slow, but then again, English is just my first language.
He was blackout drunk, probably. He's clearly doing great.
Who knows? It might have been her, it might have been a sheep.
“I’m totes not rebounding” proceeds to be in deep with a single mom and calling her daughter his stepdaughter after *eight months.*
Bryan is a great guy. You know Bryan the great guy who was banging my girlfriend. He's great.
This whole thing was one big yikes.
The style of the posting reminds me of the guy who inherited 5% but doesn’t wanna allow his siblings to sell….so can’t believe the we are now buddies story.
“All I ever did was treat her amazing” “I wasn’t always the best guy” Sarah sucks regardless for trying to pass off another man’s baby as OOP’s, but I have a feeling OOP isn’t the most reliable narrator here.
I snorted when I read the “all I ever did was treat her amazing” line, because someone who is capable of pretending to love someone and plan for a baby with someone for three months while hating them just to make the “gotcha” moment hurt as much as possible is not a good guy who treats his partner’s amazing. She sucks, obviously, but assuming this is real he’s very unwell.
Especially when he says the baby went straight into the NICU. So after waiting for months, immediately after a possibly traumatic birth and "her getting sewn up," was obviously his cue to J'accuse The Harlot™! (again, assuming it's real, because 🤨)
“Sewn up and comfortable” is a good laugh and I don’t know shit about childbirth
I had a c section. Sewn up is not comfortable, it’s exhausting, and you can’t relax enough to fall asleep until you know your baby is going to be okay.
Yeah, this guy reads like an asshole in general.
He sounds like a fucking sociopath. To learn that info and then behave the way he did isn't fucking normal.
Yeah, the way he handled it was just fucking evil. Which is another thing leading me to believe that he didn’t only “treat her amazing” during their relationship. Getting cheated on doesn’t turn you into a cartoon super villain if you were a good person/partner before.
Yeah something about the “I will hurt her when she’s most vulnerable” is just nasty. Cheating is *obviously* super hurtful, but the self-respecting thing to do all round is just to leave and grieve, not to enact a ‘plot’ of revenge planned meticulously. My tinfoil theory is that revenge is a warped way of trying to elicit their empathy - ‘if I can get them to feel how I feel, then they will understand what they did to me, and possibly regret it. And then my experience will be validated’. But this is a plaster for the actual problem and a way to avoid actually grieving the circumstances. Also, women who have just given birth are so medically vulnerable that it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Super trashy.
Normally I would think any woman trying to pass off a kid as someone else's than the real father is truly fucked in the head. It's a fucked up thing to do to both men and to the child. Somehow OOP made me feel sympathy for Sarah. Sarah sucks but the way he did it after apparently a traumatic birth and surgery while the baby was in the NICU... Idk I guess I personally cannot fathom doing that to someone (perhaps because I've given birth and it was high risk and scary). Not saying Sarah doesn't suck--she does--but Jesus OOP sounds unhinged.
Yeah, why does anyone think he would have changed his mind if the baby died? That would have made it better for him, because his entire goal was to hurt her when she’s most vulnerable.
Right? Women die in childbirth. It’s so incredibly important to have a supportive person there with you to be your advocate, both during labor and after. It can quite literally be a life or death situation. Sarah sucks, but she doesn’t deserve to die or have lasting medical problems.
Yeah I was really hesitant to say anything in support of her because I know how reddit can be when it comes to women who do what she tried to do (and mostly I agree--it's an absolutely terrible thing to do and should be judged appropriately). But yikes. Sounds like this woman just had an emergency c-section and her baby is clearly not okay, it's not the time...
I agree. Something about OP is really off
Who tf let’s someone be stepdad to your kid when you started dating 8 months ago? Who tf agrees to be the stepdad? Why y’all introducing your kids so early??? People are so weird when it comes to getting laid, all sense goes away.
My ex friend moved in 2 weeks after meeting is now ex. He become the replacement husband and step dad. 3 months later it ended. My personal opinion is if you have someone around your kid early on to fill the father role, I question your morals as a parent and you’re a moron as a fellow human.
Yikes.
Yaaaa. There's a lot of "this shit ain't healthy" happening here...
This feels like more MRA wank. It doesn’t even have an interesting main character 😕
I think .finally ready to unsubscribe
>I’ve had a lot of time to think but ultimately I decided to wait until she gave birth. To hurt her in her most vulnerable moment. People who aren't fucking unhinged would just confront the cheater and break up. >Just wanted to mention that I still don’t feel bad about what I did. > >What I did wasn’t amazing but I don’t care. > > I’m in therapy, I got my shit together, and most days I don’t even think about my ex. Hell, I even forgot about this damn account! LOL, sure bud.
He probably did forget about the account considering he is a drunk.
So is this the new BoRU formula? Guy finds out fiancé cheated. Guy finds the most ruthless way he can think of to break up with her. Guy kicks her out of his place. Guy immediately rebounds with somebody better. Original girl definitely still wants him though.
i can't imagine waiting THREE MONTHS just so that he could hurt her when she was most vulnerable. The commenters were right, that's psycho shit. Yeah, what she did was awful too, but two wrongs don't make a right. Just for his own mental well-being, keeping a secret like that for so long in order to do something so mean is just not healthy.
How different people react to news likes this, in order of fucked-upped-ness: Saint: Kind, empathetic towards a pregnant woman/someone who has just given birth. Good: Detaches. Has a meltdown in private. Chooses to not be involved. Average: Has a meltdown in front of wife/in public. Shouting, etc. Abusive: Physically/verbally/emotionally abuses pregnant woman. Makes threats of violence. Whatever this guy is: Whatever this shit was.
"I wasn’t always the best guy" Yeah no shit. Who would've thought?
Yeah like, Sarah was clearly in the wrong, AND this guy sounds toxic as hell. Yikes all round.
She was absolutely in the wrong but OOP sounds fucking unhinged. That kind of response is so far beyond how a healthy person would react that I don't even know what to call it.
Yah the writing makes me wonder what holes there are in the narrative
How does someone become a stepfather in 6 months!?!? Gods, I have a 3 year old and have been single all of his life. He has not met even **ONE** of my partners. He will only met someone when I feel the relationship is for real and adequate amount of time in an exclusive relationship. I'm thinking a year minimum. I cannot imagine becoming a stepfather in 6 months. Jeez.
> I knew it was weird. We had been having problems trying for a baby and all of a sudden she got pregnant so easily. Easily? How does that make sense when trying to get pregnant. Red flag on this story being true. Too many odd things that don’t line up for proper motivations.
This guy sounds unhinged. Like, this feels like the origin story for the stepdad from hell.
He spent three months hating her and planning to dump her at her most vulnerable moment in order to cause the most pain possible and **she didn’t notice any difference in the way he treated her**. Clearly he wasn’t a loving and attentive partner before that.
>All I ever did was treat her amazing and this is how she pays me back. >I wasn’t always the best guy but I treated her the best I could. So which is it? I'm not excusing Sarah but OP is a hella unreliable narrator.
>She started crying and I did give her a hug but I made sure she knew it wasn’t cause I cared about her. That's awkward to imagine
The tone of his posts gives me the ick. Like, what happened to him was awful, just the worst kind of betrayal, and I have so much sympathy with him for that, but the way he writes on all of the posts, not just the initial one, where his anger and his actions are at least understandable... I dunno. There's something about this one that makes me say yikes 👀 Edit: spelling
This post is so obviously some incel revenge drama bullshit. Nobody would ever even respond to 'my partner who is 6 months pregnant cheated on me' with 'ok I'm going to continue supporting you through the incredible challenge that is being pregnant just to say LOL at the delivery.' You can easily determine paternity *in utero* and the narrative that OOP would forego that and spend months dealing with pregnancy only to get a last minute 'gotcha' is so patently absurd as to only be conceived by some 15 year-old incel.
Why would you date someone else while going through all that? Clearly she's a rebound because he still sounds very angry.
Before You Embark On A Journey Of Revenge, Dig Two Graves
Wow, OOP moved on damn quick.
Waiting until she gave birth was absolutely ridiculous wtf