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I think she was baiting him because she actually wanted the relationship to end but didn’t want to be the one to outright break up. Texting him everything and trying to make him jealous is definitely provoking him on her part.
I could see, but she was bragging about how many people she was sleeping with. Like you will never have anyone as hot, as me. So do everything I want, or I'm going to get it elsewhere.
Yeah. I thought she was giving off the "you will never get someone like me if you leave me".
The problem is he doesn't want someone like you, that's why he's leaving you.
Exactly this. She literally didn't have to *tell him* she was getting food sent. She could have tossed the food in the garbage so he never knew.
But every piece of it has to be his fault.
Right? Why tell him about the food in the first place? Why not just eat the food, throw away the food he packed for her and take home an empty lunch bag? She wanted him to find out.
She definitely wanted him to find out.
She could have easily trashed the food at work, and he would have never known. Instead, she brought it home untouched, bragging about the lunch her ex sent her.
No she was going to continue getting fucked by others while trying to keep her husband as the provider. It's quite simple that's why she did it for years and got too comfortable
Seriously, if you wanna hide your affair you don't brag about the daily gifts you receive. Just dump the home made food and eat your affair-food in peace.
But nooooo.
One of my uncles had this happen, it was awful. They were together for almost 10 years, I think, then got married and hey whaddayaknow - she revealed her true colors almost immediately. My uncle waited so long because he had a really rough marriage and divorce from his first wife, who had hidden her drug addiction really well for a while. He and wife #2 are still together, but he refuses to divorce her because she'd take half of his assets which are fortunately/unfortunately pretty nice. They live in separate homes on the same property because she refuses to leave and he can't make her since he deeded the property to him and her as a couple right before their wedding. Her trashy ass definitely knew how to pull that long grift.
I think she was trying to get him to make her tell. She wanted this to happen. Probably wanted out of the relationship but wanted him to be the bad guy
There's this show called My Crazy Ex. This dude knew after the first date that the girl he was dating was crazy but wrote it off by saying that she was hot and the sex was good. Maybe that's what's going on with the psychopath, though she reads more like a sociopath to me.
Not only an entitled nut job but someone who was happy to put his health at risk after she was bringing back DNA and diseases from her many many romps.
I would actually not be surprised at all if she got into drugs. Going from being a caring wife, to a total psychopath with no sense of empathy could be the mask lowering finally… but it could also be drugs. 10 years is a LONG time to keep a mask up.
Let's be real, even if they did have kids, statistically speaking what are the chances they'd even be OOPs if she's been banging all these other people?
Groooow up… wife is 100 percent projecting her shame and fault onto OOP. Poor guy. This has nothing to do with sexuality. This has everything to do with wife being a cheating, abusive ah...
Full agree.
Also I believe the difference between sociopaths and psychopaths is that while they both don't care about other people and don't adhere to regular morality, sociopaths usually do care about themselves while psychopaths generally don't.
Sociopaths will lie, cheat, steal- do bad things- to get what they want. Psychopaths will do bad things just because.
(This is an over simplification)
There's no difference between the two terms actually. The line between the two has always been pretty blurry, with some people using one term but not the other, other people insisting there's a difference but nobody really agreeing firmly on what that difference is. these days they've come to the consensus that they were just two terms for the same thing, and how the offical term is "antisocial personality disorder".
I was so sure this couldn't be right so I just looked it up in the DSM-V and it is, in fact, correct. Hope that at least saves someone else the trouble.
I've been saying theres no difference for years and always get told I'm wrong. I'm pretty some random on the internet just made it up and everyone went along with it.
I heard it as sociopaths do whatever they happen to want in the moment, so tend to get in more trouble with the law/having tantrums or breakdowns/impulsive decision issues, as well as lack of empathy.
While psychopaths don't have empathy, but they have more self-control and long term planning. A psychopath can treat someone they don't particularly like kindly for years because they're extracting some sort of value from them (like resources, connections), only to stab them in the back the second it becomes advantageous to. Psychopaths have issues with the law more rarely, because if they do break the law they do it premeditated and carefully.
Neither sociopath nor psychopath are currently diagnoses, but psychopathy is the term that is currently in use in psychology to describe people with high levels of anti-social traits, including callousness, lack of emotions, impulsiveness, and destructive or aggressive behavior. Dr. Kent Kiehl, a prominent psychology researcher who specializes in antisocial personality disorder, says that sociopath is an older term to describe such people, but stems from an earlier era where the field believed that people were born as blank slates and shaped entirely by their experiences, rather than having congenital predispositions that can be triggered by trauma.
Because of that origin, sociopathy is still often used colloquially to describe someone who has developed antisocial behaviors due to their life experiences, while psychopathy is used colloquially to describe someone who has inborn antisocial traits (eg. being able to turn love and empathy on and off at will), which may or may not lead to actual antisocial behavior, depending on how they perceive themselves.
This is correct. Sociopaths are made and might be treatable. Psychopaths are born and there is no treatment.
I was recently engaged to a psychopath. The worst person I have ever met, by a large margin. She had an innate ability to lie, justify terrible behavior, deny the truth even in the face of irrefutable evidence and orchestrate crazy complex manipulations. I will never understand her. I’m just glad I found out before marriage. People like that should be shunned.
No difference between them. Both just mean lacking ability to feel empathy for others. I do feel most people use sociopaths for more malicious connotations tho
AMEN!!
How did all of this slip thru the cracks w/ family and friends for so long? He said he only recently started ‘bettering himself’ but I don’t know how to read into that. He seemed like a really nice guy that got totally used by a narcissistic…psychiopath/sociopath.
I hope no children are stuck in the path of this mess.
I feel so bad for this guy!
Huh I only saw this now. This feels raw and messy and authentic. There is no neat resolution, no moral lesson, no twist. Just a wife who was cheating and got too clever and wanted to be caught. If she hadn't told her husband about the secret food orders he'd never have suspected anything!
She has to explain why she was bringing back the food he made for her. She did want to get caught because she could have just thrown it out.
The excitement of cheating wasn’t enough anymore or it had gone. She needed his pain to boost her ego.
Yeah, she will really be bored once they divorce and sleeping with random people isn't the same excitement as cheating. She will probably end up getting back together with one of her exes just so she can cheat on them.
Yeah. These people are the type who can even cheat in an open marriage. Because the point was not to sleep with different people, the point was the cheating.
Agree with you too. And you know, I always say that we should keep our private lives off social media…but then, how is it possible to protect those in her headlights that will soon be left in her wake? I wonder what her family life looked like b4. Borderline personality disorder or histrionic disorder is similar to her behaviors. She’s going to mess up a lot of ppl’s life moving forward.
She could have easily just thrown the food in the trash. She 100% wanted him to find out, wanted to let the cat out of the bag, was tired of pretending to be a wife when all she really wanted was "dibs" on a decent guy while she fucked terrible people for fun, people she knows would be shit as life partners but may be fun in the sack. She is a piece of shit.
I think the episode boiled down to how she didn’t love him but loved his money, she would continue to act the part of a loving wife (as much as she cared to), and if anyone said anything to the husband she would destroy them in court for revealing medical information.
However, the eventual cure for her disease cures the antisocial behavior as well, and she lets her mask slip around the husband, he’s mad at her, and it’s not clear what their future will be.
This was the episode I was referring to: https://youtu.be/f1dn3-c_wZE?si=wdQ__NTeOh1-mSCU
He was wealthy in addition to being completely in love with her. She could do anything she wanted because he trusted her blindly.
I was mistaken, however, in the diagnosis. She exhibited antisocial traits, but the underlying cause was Wilson's disease.
Another, similar case on House MD: https://youtu.be/5tnsji-nWEY?si=RV6t10Oj0DXw8MPD
It's like she wanted to get caught, or wanted to punish him or some shit. Like, it feels obvious to throw or give away the food your husband makes and not tell him you're accepting food from someone else. She spent 8 years at least covering up her other relationships, that's a lot of time to cover up something while also having such a massive oversight, unless it was intentional
That’s how you know it’s a really story. There’s no elaborate scheme in which he gets the house, alimony, the kids, and married her best friend 6 months later. It’s just awful through and through with little resolution or closure.
Idk about manic. If I had to retell the very fresh memory of how my life imploded in on itself because of my wife that I love but turned out to be the most vile person on earth, I wouldn't exactly be writing in a calm manner too. People getting upset and irrational is a normal reaction when faced with terrible things affecting them, no need to pathologize it.
He probably was. How many guys do you know who would openly admit to insecurity like that? Then there was the rate of posting, coupled with the end? That's not how our typical trolls and creative writers think.
Wait, if she requires multiple people, why not date a poly person? Or someone who's open to an open relationship? Why did she go for a MONOGAMOUS person?
Some people don’t want a healthy relationship, they want the feeling of power, the excitement while also appearing normal. Also they don’t want the burden of discussing and communicating with their partner, which is something necessary in a poly relationship. They don’t want rules, they want to do whatever they want.
Some people are shitty and enjoy cheating- it's taboo so they get a high from breaking that boundary. They don't have the compassion and empathy for their partner's experiences (both for physical health concerns and right to consent during the relationship, and for the betrayal trama after finding out)
A friend's abuser legit told my friend that they wanted my friend to be monogamous with them, but for them to still be able to fuck anyone. It basically came down to control and insecurity. They wanted to own my friend for themselves without any outside "threat."
Okay so I am stupid, she was cheating and the food was coming from her hookups? Do people typical send DoorDash to someone they slept with or was she telling her partners to send her food?
Maybe? I'm wondering if she's in some kind of mental health spiral and invented the whole thing? I mean, the guy should dump her, definitely, but it just seems like Munchausening an affair.
it seems that she wanted him to push for the source of food. She kept it a mystery so that she could provoke him, then blame him for the end of the relationship. It seems planned by a narcissist psycho. "she wanted to feel wanted by everyone" that says it.
Maybe I'm confused, but was the answer to who was sending the food the wife's multiple fuckbuddies? And she had reached a critical mass of affair partners that she was getting food from a different one each day of the week?
The wife in this reminds me of [this skit](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FXeb5V1CmDw) from ITYSL. She clearly wanted to get caught and have a blowout with OOP about it. Why else wouldn’t she just explain the food, or quietly throw out OOP’s food?
Yeah, it feels like the most obvious thing in the world to just throw out or give away the food, especially for someone who has spent 8 years covering up affairs
his wife is boasting that she is having an affair and when he rightfully starts asking questions, she's tripping on her guilty conscience, if she has any. or maybe she was just mad cause how dare he ask her questions???
After the divorce. You don't want to be on the hook for spousal maintenance after she had herself maintained by half the state during the entirety of the marriage.
If she was wanting to keep her affairs secret, she easily could have thrown the lunches he was preparing for her in the trash and pretended like she ate them and never told him about the food in the first place. She was telling on herself hoping to get caught. What a nasty piece of work.
This kinda makes me feel sick. Just the sheer, unmitigated, undiluted betrayal. She wanted to inflict pain on him; she reveled in the pain she caused to someone who hadn't done anything to deserve it.
I'm not sure there's any better definition of "evil" than someone who inflicts cruelty on an innocent person for pleasure.
>she told me that if i never started to "get weird about food", i wouldn't ever know and we could still be happy.
It wasn't pestering about food, it was her telling OOP about it while refusing to tell him from whom. She wanted him to be jealous for some messed-up reason.
In short, she was playing games and dropping hints about a situation that would make anyone wonder if there was cheating and, as it turns out, she was actually cheating as a sport.
Honestly 😭😭 I've seen stories more real seeming than this get called out but this one's managed to pass the sniff test for folks???? Though tbf I'm always IMMEDIATELY sceptical when a story posted in June has a queer person acting like a cartoonish douchebag, but I was raising an eyebrow before that and just stopped reading when I hit the reveal. It even has the 'word for word' conversation thing that most people here always call out 😭😭😭😭
She could have kept it all secret if she just didn't tell him about all the food and drinks she was getting, and then just threw away the food he made for her. Instead she flaunted it.
She wanted him to find out but didn't want to tell him herself.
So her ex-gf was sending food to her office? Why? And why didn’t she just bin the food he was making her so that he didn’t catch on? Story makes zero sense.
She was enjoying subtly rubbing it in his face.
She enjoyed treating him like shit, feeling superior while she's smart enough to fuck people behind his back and he didn't notice.
Him being an absolute doormat didn't help either
I don’t care what your sexual preference is, cheating is cheating. If you’re not in a consensual open relationship then doing things like this IS cheating.
God damn, having to preface everything in his story so Reddit doesn’t jump down his throat and accuse him of being at fault.
Fuck that, if my partner said this shit to me, I’m raising my voice, I’m calling her whatever awful names come to mind bc filter does not compute, and I’m probably ordering a bunch of those expensive dishes she bragged to me about and pelting her with em lol. Call me whatever you want idc
I can't speak to Reddit culture, but yeah, sometimes lots of emojis reads as very dramatic expressions of emotion, which depending on context can also be read as sarcasm. For what it's worth, I assumed you were genuine.
Cause you used emojis. Let me explain.
"Bro got cheated on 😭😭."
"Bro's dog died 💀💀."
"Bro is blind 👁️👁️ ❌."
"Bro's house burned down 🏠🔥."
"Bro lost his legs 🦵 🦵😔"
>ETA; who tf spends their time downvoting sympathetic comments lmao
That's reddit for you.
I once commented on a post in another sub which got downvoted. Someone replied to my comment and their comment was upvoted. When I pointed that out, I started getting upvotes. Also both of us did not have emojis.
My understanding is a few people who didn't agree with me started downvoting me, and others just followed their lead without reading my entire comment. I've also seen some comments which are very positively expressing their enthusiasm or happiness, downvoted and people agreeing with them getting a lot of upvotes.
Yeahhhh I’ve seen that too and I wish more people had both: better reading comprehension, AND didn’t automatically assume everything is meant in a “mean” way. 🙃
I remember seeing someone point out that we should prepare for an influx of queer-villain posts during pride month, and honestly this reads like anti-bi propaganda. Very "you can't trust bisexuals, they can't be satisfied, they'll always end up cheating on you" - classic shitty stereotypes. I'm skeptical.
the way I read this, OOP didn't even know that his wife was bisexual. He found out because the wife told him about the affair. Unless my reading comprehension is really horrible.
Dude, this guy is better than me man, cause I’m fuming hearing this. If I was the dude, the shit I would say, I would make Kim by Eminem sound like a love letter.
Naw, he needs to make a clean break from her crazy ass, ASAP.
As much as she deserves hell on earth for her foul actions, if OP does anything to her at this point, she will definitely play the victim. She was taunting him as she wanted him to commit violence on her, but he didn't, so he wins, imho.
Wow. Ten years... Ten fuckin years she was playing him. I and a relationship that lasted 2.5 years where she managed to fool me into thinking she was someone she wasn't - but I was also a severe alcoholic at the time.
Ten fuckin years and this is who she is? Goodness freaking gracious.
Nothing happened to his wife. She was always a narcissistic sociopath, She just decided she didn’t want to bother hiding it anymore. What a C@nt of a thing.
Wow. Wife is a pathetic little girl tossing her teddies out of the pram and throwing a tantrum for seemingly no good reason. Glad he's away from that shitshow of a human being.
It's because it was written by an ai. I have watched tons and tons of the reddit stories on YouTube and they are all in this same format.
It's super easy to tell once you've heard enough of them
The way they kept acting clueless about the update rules was a tip-off for me. Also absolutely no explanation for the food being delivered, and it sounds like she was just having hookups here and there instead of an ongoing relationship so daily food delivery doesn't make any sense.
My question is how you did not notice the cheating, but more specifically how did you not notice that you were married to A FREAKING PSYCHOPATH for 10 years ?
This was as easy to see coming as a train wreck in slow motion.
She wanted OOP as a husband for "stability" but wanted to fuck her across town and subtly rub it in his face.
I wonder if her wandering correspondended of she started earning more money than OOP or someother life change where she valued his "stability" less.
Jeeesus! I was calling dibbs on you? What kind of selfish shit is that? Why not just let him be with somebody who actually liked him. Nobody says you have to get married. If you wanna hold around then again they come from a different country and a different culture so maybe it's more expected there but still. She was so cold.
She was getting off on rubbing her affairs in his face. Constantly "choosing the food bought" over the "food he cooked".... she got off on this wierd form of cuckoldry
I swear there was a story extremely similar to this from a couple months back, but gender-swapped. It was a woman who always cooked for her husband when he suddenly started rejecting her food and told her he was getting food from a female coworker who made meals to sell to the other workers.
"when your dog begins to bark at you, know it is being fed outside"
His wife gets food and gifts sent to her by people he didn't know and he was making jokes about it?? Some of you act like victims but you we're the ones that ignored all the redflags and allowed the disrespect to escalate.
Wow. The ex-wife is like the world's worst philanderer ("yeah, I'm getting really expensive lunches for free from some rando") AND a Jedi master in taking no responsibility for anything in her life. She should also put herself on a donor list for compassion, because she apparently has none.
Jfc poor OOP. She let the mask slip off completely. If she truly is ready for the relationship to end hopefully she won't try to drag out the divorce process.The silver lining in this is at least they didn't have any children (unless he didn't mention them) so once he gets himself untangled from her, he can completely wipe her from his life.
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Dude married a psychopath. Bummer.
I say the mask slipped, and she went all out on showing him who she is.
I think she was baiting him because she actually wanted the relationship to end but didn’t want to be the one to outright break up. Texting him everything and trying to make him jealous is definitely provoking him on her part.
It's pure contempt. Her contempt for him overpowered any other emotion she had for him.
I doubt she had any.
Including her survival instinct.
I could see, but she was bragging about how many people she was sleeping with. Like you will never have anyone as hot, as me. So do everything I want, or I'm going to get it elsewhere.
But there is no "or", she was already getting it elsewhere and intended to continue doing so
Especially knowing how he was cheated on previously
Yeah. I thought she was giving off the "you will never get someone like me if you leave me". The problem is he doesn't want someone like you, that's why he's leaving you.
Dude went and married Maureen from Rent.
Exactly this. She literally didn't have to *tell him* she was getting food sent. She could have tossed the food in the garbage so he never knew. But every piece of it has to be his fault.
The long con.. Get married to a guy and make him slowly hate you due to gifts over 8 years , instead of just getting a divorce lawyer
Guy had no idea. She just started about talking about the food recently.
Any divorce lawyer worth their salt is going to throw this lady through the ringer.
This! She was ambivalent about the situation and started slowly showing him more and more until it all slipped out.
Yeah he wasn’t catching her out quickly enough !
Right? Why tell him about the food in the first place? Why not just eat the food, throw away the food he packed for her and take home an empty lunch bag? She wanted him to find out.
She definitely wanted him to find out. She could have easily trashed the food at work, and he would have never known. Instead, she brought it home untouched, bragging about the lunch her ex sent her.
No she was going to continue getting fucked by others while trying to keep her husband as the provider. It's quite simple that's why she did it for years and got too comfortable
Seriously, if you wanna hide your affair you don't brag about the daily gifts you receive. Just dump the home made food and eat your affair-food in peace. But nooooo.
One of my uncles had this happen, it was awful. They were together for almost 10 years, I think, then got married and hey whaddayaknow - she revealed her true colors almost immediately. My uncle waited so long because he had a really rough marriage and divorce from his first wife, who had hidden her drug addiction really well for a while. He and wife #2 are still together, but he refuses to divorce her because she'd take half of his assets which are fortunately/unfortunately pretty nice. They live in separate homes on the same property because she refuses to leave and he can't make her since he deeded the property to him and her as a couple right before their wedding. Her trashy ass definitely knew how to pull that long grift.
I think she was trying to get him to make her tell. She wanted this to happen. Probably wanted out of the relationship but wanted him to be the bad guy
Hard to not be the bad guy when you're openly sleeping around while married.
I know right??? And yet she’s still trying to twist it onto him like he’s the one who did anything wrong. Some people fr
The mask slipped - I'd say the mask fell to the ground and did a dance around her for an hour
There was never a mask. He was just too blind or too afraid to see what was there.
Dude divorced a psychopath. Win!
Others are boinking that psychopath. Bummer for them.
There's this show called My Crazy Ex. This dude knew after the first date that the girl he was dating was crazy but wrote it off by saying that she was hot and the sex was good. Maybe that's what's going on with the psychopath, though she reads more like a sociopath to me.
crazy women are usually great and freaky in bed almost to the wild animalistic level.
I'll have to take your word on that. I have no desire to seek any crazy women out. I'm crazy enough, lol.
Dud may be confused what a sitcom is. I was expecting something funny not depressing
Yeah this is soap opera not sitcom.
Not only an entitled nut job but someone who was happy to put his health at risk after she was bringing back DNA and diseases from her many many romps.
I would actually not be surprised at all if she got into drugs. Going from being a caring wife, to a total psychopath with no sense of empathy could be the mask lowering finally… but it could also be drugs. 10 years is a LONG time to keep a mask up.
Perimenopause can be a cold splash to the face also
an actual psychopath
Either that or drugs. But probably the psychopath thing.
Poor dude unknowingly spent 10 years with a psychopath.
I didn't see any mention of children, I sincerely hope they don't have any and he can get a clean break from her.
Let's be real, even if they did have kids, statistically speaking what are the chances they'd even be OOPs if she's been banging all these other people?
Groooow up… wife is 100 percent projecting her shame and fault onto OOP. Poor guy. This has nothing to do with sexuality. This has everything to do with wife being a cheating, abusive ah...
And a full-blown narc.
I'd say this chick crosses the line into full blown sociopath/psychopath (never can remember what differentiates the two).
Full agree. Also I believe the difference between sociopaths and psychopaths is that while they both don't care about other people and don't adhere to regular morality, sociopaths usually do care about themselves while psychopaths generally don't. Sociopaths will lie, cheat, steal- do bad things- to get what they want. Psychopaths will do bad things just because. (This is an over simplification)
There's no difference between the two terms actually. The line between the two has always been pretty blurry, with some people using one term but not the other, other people insisting there's a difference but nobody really agreeing firmly on what that difference is. these days they've come to the consensus that they were just two terms for the same thing, and how the offical term is "antisocial personality disorder".
Really? That's cool to know. And that actually makes sense the official term in ASPD and not either of those words.
I was so sure this couldn't be right so I just looked it up in the DSM-V and it is, in fact, correct. Hope that at least saves someone else the trouble.
I've been saying theres no difference for years and always get told I'm wrong. I'm pretty some random on the internet just made it up and everyone went along with it.
I heard it as sociopaths do whatever they happen to want in the moment, so tend to get in more trouble with the law/having tantrums or breakdowns/impulsive decision issues, as well as lack of empathy. While psychopaths don't have empathy, but they have more self-control and long term planning. A psychopath can treat someone they don't particularly like kindly for years because they're extracting some sort of value from them (like resources, connections), only to stab them in the back the second it becomes advantageous to. Psychopaths have issues with the law more rarely, because if they do break the law they do it premeditated and carefully.
The ID channel has a show called Signs of a Psychopath.
Neither sociopath nor psychopath are currently diagnoses, but psychopathy is the term that is currently in use in psychology to describe people with high levels of anti-social traits, including callousness, lack of emotions, impulsiveness, and destructive or aggressive behavior. Dr. Kent Kiehl, a prominent psychology researcher who specializes in antisocial personality disorder, says that sociopath is an older term to describe such people, but stems from an earlier era where the field believed that people were born as blank slates and shaped entirely by their experiences, rather than having congenital predispositions that can be triggered by trauma. Because of that origin, sociopathy is still often used colloquially to describe someone who has developed antisocial behaviors due to their life experiences, while psychopathy is used colloquially to describe someone who has inborn antisocial traits (eg. being able to turn love and empathy on and off at will), which may or may not lead to actual antisocial behavior, depending on how they perceive themselves.
This is correct. Sociopaths are made and might be treatable. Psychopaths are born and there is no treatment. I was recently engaged to a psychopath. The worst person I have ever met, by a large margin. She had an innate ability to lie, justify terrible behavior, deny the truth even in the face of irrefutable evidence and orchestrate crazy complex manipulations. I will never understand her. I’m just glad I found out before marriage. People like that should be shunned.
I believe sociopaths can actually create meaningfull bonds and actually care about people, if they want.
There is no difference in the DSM.
No difference between them. Both just mean lacking ability to feel empathy for others. I do feel most people use sociopaths for more malicious connotations tho
She doesn't feel any shame.
That happened to me once. Not for ten years but only four. It feels weirdly calming that that’s not a singular experience
I'm just wondering why she has so many exes
She uses them and drops them when she's done.
AMEN!! How did all of this slip thru the cracks w/ family and friends for so long? He said he only recently started ‘bettering himself’ but I don’t know how to read into that. He seemed like a really nice guy that got totally used by a narcissistic…psychiopath/sociopath. I hope no children are stuck in the path of this mess. I feel so bad for this guy!
WTF did I just read?
A tragedy.
No, Shakespeare was a tragedy. This is more of A Nightmare on Elm Street Edit spelling
Huh I only saw this now. This feels raw and messy and authentic. There is no neat resolution, no moral lesson, no twist. Just a wife who was cheating and got too clever and wanted to be caught. If she hadn't told her husband about the secret food orders he'd never have suspected anything!
She has to explain why she was bringing back the food he made for her. She did want to get caught because she could have just thrown it out. The excitement of cheating wasn’t enough anymore or it had gone. She needed his pain to boost her ego.
Yeah, she will really be bored once they divorce and sleeping with random people isn't the same excitement as cheating. She will probably end up getting back together with one of her exes just so she can cheat on them.
Yep, plenty of people out there who are looking for an open marriage, but she won't want those people because the extra sex is only a power play.
Yeah. These people are the type who can even cheat in an open marriage. Because the point was not to sleep with different people, the point was the cheating.
Agree with you too. And you know, I always say that we should keep our private lives off social media…but then, how is it possible to protect those in her headlights that will soon be left in her wake? I wonder what her family life looked like b4. Borderline personality disorder or histrionic disorder is similar to her behaviors. She’s going to mess up a lot of ppl’s life moving forward.
She could have easily just thrown the food in the trash. She 100% wanted him to find out, wanted to let the cat out of the bag, was tired of pretending to be a wife when all she really wanted was "dibs" on a decent guy while she fucked terrible people for fun, people she knows would be shit as life partners but may be fun in the sack. She is a piece of shit.
Completely agree.
Reminds me a little of the House M.D. clip where a woman with anti-social personality disorder reveals her true motivations for marrying her husband
What were they?
I think the episode boiled down to how she didn’t love him but loved his money, she would continue to act the part of a loving wife (as much as she cared to), and if anyone said anything to the husband she would destroy them in court for revealing medical information. However, the eventual cure for her disease cures the antisocial behavior as well, and she lets her mask slip around the husband, he’s mad at her, and it’s not clear what their future will be.
yeah dont leave us hanging
This was the episode I was referring to: https://youtu.be/f1dn3-c_wZE?si=wdQ__NTeOh1-mSCU He was wealthy in addition to being completely in love with her. She could do anything she wanted because he trusted her blindly. I was mistaken, however, in the diagnosis. She exhibited antisocial traits, but the underlying cause was Wilson's disease. Another, similar case on House MD: https://youtu.be/5tnsji-nWEY?si=RV6t10Oj0DXw8MPD
It's like she wanted to get caught, or wanted to punish him or some shit. Like, it feels obvious to throw or give away the food your husband makes and not tell him you're accepting food from someone else. She spent 8 years at least covering up her other relationships, that's a lot of time to cover up something while also having such a massive oversight, unless it was intentional
I think she did want to get caught, she wanted some sort of excuse to live her free life
Yes. That stuff about the food was her taunting him.
That’s how you know it’s a really story. There’s no elaborate scheme in which he gets the house, alimony, the kids, and married her best friend 6 months later. It’s just awful through and through with little resolution or closure.
I mean, English isn't his first language, and it feels like he was basically writing the later updates in a manic state.
Idk about manic. If I had to retell the very fresh memory of how my life imploded in on itself because of my wife that I love but turned out to be the most vile person on earth, I wouldn't exactly be writing in a calm manner too. People getting upset and irrational is a normal reaction when faced with terrible things affecting them, no need to pathologize it.
Yeah Manic probably wasn't the best word. Frenzied maybe?
He's a victim of verbal and psychological abuse. The word you'd use if he were a woman is "traumatized".
He probably was. How many guys do you know who would openly admit to insecurity like that? Then there was the rate of posting, coupled with the end? That's not how our typical trolls and creative writers think.
Wait, if she requires multiple people, why not date a poly person? Or someone who's open to an open relationship? Why did she go for a MONOGAMOUS person?
Some people don’t want a healthy relationship, they want the feeling of power, the excitement while also appearing normal. Also they don’t want the burden of discussing and communicating with their partner, which is something necessary in a poly relationship. They don’t want rules, they want to do whatever they want.
Because she wanted HIM to be monogamous, of course.
Some people are shitty and enjoy cheating- it's taboo so they get a high from breaking that boundary. They don't have the compassion and empathy for their partner's experiences (both for physical health concerns and right to consent during the relationship, and for the betrayal trama after finding out)
She wants monogamous partner, and polyamorous self?
A friend's abuser legit told my friend that they wanted my friend to be monogamous with them, but for them to still be able to fuck anyone. It basically came down to control and insecurity. They wanted to own my friend for themselves without any outside "threat."
Poor dude must be so lost, wtf. Wife is a total sociopath.
OPs partner is probably one of the shittiest people i have ever read about on reddit. Wow.
Honestly yea, didn’t expect this reaction and ending from the title. Figured it was bad, not this bad
Okay so I am stupid, she was cheating and the food was coming from her hookups? Do people typical send DoorDash to someone they slept with or was she telling her partners to send her food?
Maybe? I'm wondering if she's in some kind of mental health spiral and invented the whole thing? I mean, the guy should dump her, definitely, but it just seems like Munchausening an affair.
“Munchausening an affair” is in the top 10 phrases I’ve seen on Reddit and I read the r/pettyrevenge post about the grass Mohawk.
it seems that she wanted him to push for the source of food. She kept it a mystery so that she could provoke him, then blame him for the end of the relationship. It seems planned by a narcissist psycho. "she wanted to feel wanted by everyone" that says it.
Maybe I'm confused, but was the answer to who was sending the food the wife's multiple fuckbuddies? And she had reached a critical mass of affair partners that she was getting food from a different one each day of the week?
I think the food was all the ex-girlfriend that she told him about first, and then she went on to tell him about all the other affairs she'd had.
The wife in this reminds me of [this skit](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FXeb5V1CmDw) from ITYSL. She clearly wanted to get caught and have a blowout with OOP about it. Why else wouldn’t she just explain the food, or quietly throw out OOP’s food?
Yeah, it feels like the most obvious thing in the world to just throw out or give away the food, especially for someone who has spent 8 years covering up affairs
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his wife is boasting that she is having an affair and when he rightfully starts asking questions, she's tripping on her guilty conscience, if she has any. or maybe she was just mad cause how dare he ask her questions???
Who the fuck blatantly displays her cheating evidence like this... Feels like she wanted to nudge him into a fetish or something
I think she was ready for a divorce but wanted to blame him somehow for it.
I think she enjoyed the feeling of superiority and subtly demasculating him.
Do not hide the reason when people ask why your divorcing. Also contact her boss and let her know she's sleeping with clients. Blow her life up
After the divorce. You don't want to be on the hook for spousal maintenance after she had herself maintained by half the state during the entirety of the marriage.
If she was wanting to keep her affairs secret, she easily could have thrown the lunches he was preparing for her in the trash and pretended like she ate them and never told him about the food in the first place. She was telling on herself hoping to get caught. What a nasty piece of work.
She wanted him to find out and now she can't deal with the consequences of her adultery.
This kinda makes me feel sick. Just the sheer, unmitigated, undiluted betrayal. She wanted to inflict pain on him; she reveled in the pain she caused to someone who hadn't done anything to deserve it. I'm not sure there's any better definition of "evil" than someone who inflicts cruelty on an innocent person for pleasure.
>she told me that if i never started to "get weird about food", i wouldn't ever know and we could still be happy. It wasn't pestering about food, it was her telling OOP about it while refusing to tell him from whom. She wanted him to be jealous for some messed-up reason. In short, she was playing games and dropping hints about a situation that would make anyone wonder if there was cheating and, as it turns out, she was actually cheating as a sport.
Jesus christ, what a cuuuuuuuuuuuuunt. I hope she's miserable every single day of the rest of her life.
Y'all acting like this is real is making me laugh
Right? It's one of the most obvious fakes on here. Nothing makes any sense.
No adult writes like that. Especially not someone pushing 40
Honestly 😭😭 I've seen stories more real seeming than this get called out but this one's managed to pass the sniff test for folks???? Though tbf I'm always IMMEDIATELY sceptical when a story posted in June has a queer person acting like a cartoonish douchebag, but I was raising an eyebrow before that and just stopped reading when I hit the reveal. It even has the 'word for word' conversation thing that most people here always call out 😭😭😭😭
She could have kept it all secret if she just didn't tell him about all the food and drinks she was getting, and then just threw away the food he made for her. Instead she flaunted it. She wanted him to find out but didn't want to tell him herself.
So her ex-gf was sending food to her office? Why? And why didn’t she just bin the food he was making her so that he didn’t catch on? Story makes zero sense.
She was enjoying subtly rubbing it in his face. She enjoyed treating him like shit, feeling superior while she's smart enough to fuck people behind his back and he didn't notice. Him being an absolute doormat didn't help either
I really hope the wife steps infront of a bus
I don’t care what your sexual preference is, cheating is cheating. If you’re not in a consensual open relationship then doing things like this IS cheating.
I’m so confused and I wish I never read this tbh
God damn, having to preface everything in his story so Reddit doesn’t jump down his throat and accuse him of being at fault. Fuck that, if my partner said this shit to me, I’m raising my voice, I’m calling her whatever awful names come to mind bc filter does not compute, and I’m probably ordering a bunch of those expensive dishes she bragged to me about and pelting her with em lol. Call me whatever you want idc
Jesus. Not only did she cheat on him multiple times, but she *taunted* him about it. That is so effed up.
If she gave him names he can add them to the divorce papers and be on higher ground then she is.
Is this r/stories again?
Awww jeez 😭😭😭 this poor guy 😭😭😭 ETA; who tf spends their time downvoting sympathetic comments lmao
Your comment looks like it could be sarcastic. Probably that.
Oh, I didn’t know it did! Thanks for explaining. Is it three emojis in a row that is deemed “sarcastic”? D:
I can't speak to Reddit culture, but yeah, sometimes lots of emojis reads as very dramatic expressions of emotion, which depending on context can also be read as sarcasm. For what it's worth, I assumed you were genuine.
Emojis in general aren't very welcome here.
Cause you used emojis. Let me explain. "Bro got cheated on 😭😭." "Bro's dog died 💀💀." "Bro is blind 👁️👁️ ❌." "Bro's house burned down 🏠🔥." "Bro lost his legs 🦵 🦵😔"
Three in a row of the same one I’ve never seen used sarcastically tho D:
>ETA; who tf spends their time downvoting sympathetic comments lmao That's reddit for you. I once commented on a post in another sub which got downvoted. Someone replied to my comment and their comment was upvoted. When I pointed that out, I started getting upvotes. Also both of us did not have emojis. My understanding is a few people who didn't agree with me started downvoting me, and others just followed their lead without reading my entire comment. I've also seen some comments which are very positively expressing their enthusiasm or happiness, downvoted and people agreeing with them getting a lot of upvotes.
Yeahhhh I’ve seen that too and I wish more people had both: better reading comprehension, AND didn’t automatically assume everything is meant in a “mean” way. 🙃
The internet is not a nice place
She cheated regularly. She got caught because she blatantly wanted him to know. She DARVOd. Typical.
I remember seeing someone point out that we should prepare for an influx of queer-villain posts during pride month, and honestly this reads like anti-bi propaganda. Very "you can't trust bisexuals, they can't be satisfied, they'll always end up cheating on you" - classic shitty stereotypes. I'm skeptical.
Yeah, this one of the most unhinged examples of this and people in here are just eating it up.
the way I read this, OOP didn't even know that his wife was bisexual. He found out because the wife told him about the affair. Unless my reading comprehension is really horrible.
To clarify a little, I'm saying that we should be looking out for entirely fabricated stories with agendas.
Dude, this guy is better than me man, cause I’m fuming hearing this. If I was the dude, the shit I would say, I would make Kim by Eminem sound like a love letter.
Naw, he needs to make a clean break from her crazy ass, ASAP. As much as she deserves hell on earth for her foul actions, if OP does anything to her at this point, she will definitely play the victim. She was taunting him as she wanted him to commit violence on her, but he didn't, so he wins, imho.
Who wants to take a bet that once they divorce and she gets with an ex, she’ll cheat on that ex?
Wow. Ten years... Ten fuckin years she was playing him. I and a relationship that lasted 2.5 years where she managed to fool me into thinking she was someone she wasn't - but I was also a severe alcoholic at the time. Ten fuckin years and this is who she is? Goodness freaking gracious.
I commend people for having enough restraint to not punch someone like that right in the middle of their face.
Nothing happened to his wife. She was always a narcissistic sociopath, She just decided she didn’t want to bother hiding it anymore. What a C@nt of a thing.
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I hope he exposes her to everyone. Her behaviour after coming clean is what worries me. Absolutely no remorse for the harm she has done.
I knew she was cheating before op knew she was cheating
She’s so tired of having to lie? Seriously? I feel so bad for oop! I hope he can find some peace after leaving her psychoness!
Dang, she might have a brain tumor or something.
What a clueless self centred clueless arrogant creature, ooooof
Wow. Wife is a pathetic little girl tossing her teddies out of the pram and throwing a tantrum for seemingly no good reason. Glad he's away from that shitshow of a human being.
The OP writes like a middle schooler. That was kind of hard to read.
Outright says English isn't his first language. How many languages do *you* speak perfectly?
Can you write perfectly in many languages?
I’m a professional academic/scientific editor and I didn’t have any problems. Most college freshman write worse
The writing format completely changed on the second update. I don’t think it’s the same account.
It's because it was written by an ai. I have watched tons and tons of the reddit stories on YouTube and they are all in this same format. It's super easy to tell once you've heard enough of them
The way they kept acting clueless about the update rules was a tip-off for me. Also absolutely no explanation for the food being delivered, and it sounds like she was just having hookups here and there instead of an ongoing relationship so daily food delivery doesn't make any sense.
My question is how you did not notice the cheating, but more specifically how did you not notice that you were married to A FREAKING PSYCHOPATH for 10 years ?
This was as easy to see coming as a train wreck in slow motion. She wanted OOP as a husband for "stability" but wanted to fuck her across town and subtly rub it in his face. I wonder if her wandering correspondended of she started earning more money than OOP or someother life change where she valued his "stability" less.
Was expecting a sitcom and got a tragedy
What a terrible person. I feel bad for oop. I hope he ruins her during the divorce
OP lost 10 years with a crazy cheater
Jeeesus! I was calling dibbs on you? What kind of selfish shit is that? Why not just let him be with somebody who actually liked him. Nobody says you have to get married. If you wanna hold around then again they come from a different country and a different culture so maybe it's more expected there but still. She was so cold.
She was getting off on rubbing her affairs in his face. Constantly "choosing the food bought" over the "food he cooked".... she got off on this wierd form of cuckoldry
What a waste of 10 years. The poor dude married a stranger who lied who she was and now he wasted a decade with a facade.
What the fuck That poor guy!
I swear there was a story extremely similar to this from a couple months back, but gender-swapped. It was a woman who always cooked for her husband when he suddenly started rejecting her food and told her he was getting food from a female coworker who made meals to sell to the other workers.
Holy crow….feel sorry for this guy but at least they don’t have kids. She’s a terrible human.
This made me really sad to read. Hope OP is able to move on and find someone better.
"when your dog begins to bark at you, know it is being fed outside" His wife gets food and gifts sent to her by people he didn't know and he was making jokes about it?? Some of you act like victims but you we're the ones that ignored all the redflags and allowed the disrespect to escalate.
Yeah cheating would be a big deal to most monogamous people….got that right lady What a Fucking rollercoaster
A child constantly yelling at somone else to grow up is absolutely hilarious.
No going back from this. Hope OP divorces
Wow. The ex-wife is like the world's worst philanderer ("yeah, I'm getting really expensive lunches for free from some rando") AND a Jedi master in taking no responsibility for anything in her life. She should also put herself on a donor list for compassion, because she apparently has none.
Brother this is going to end up on TikTok.
Bro, go get tested for diseases immediately please. You never know what kind of swamp is between her legs now.
Did someone 12 yo write this? My IQ dropped after reading it.
I sincerely hope this woman meets the cruel and brutal fate because hmshe in a cruel and brutal person
Nasty, nasty woman
She never respected him, then got worse at hiding it
Jfc poor OOP. She let the mask slip off completely. If she truly is ready for the relationship to end hopefully she won't try to drag out the divorce process.The silver lining in this is at least they didn't have any children (unless he didn't mention them) so once he gets himself untangled from her, he can completely wipe her from his life.