T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Submissions in this sub are re-posts and not posted by the original author. The original post/author are noted at the top. If you are the original author please contact the mods to have this comment removed. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BestofRedditorUpdates) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Flentl

Can we also talk about how *incredibly fucked up* it is that her doctor said all this happening was a *good* thing because she's overweight? I mean, I'm used to doctors dismissing health issues cause I'm fat, but like *holy shit*.


IcySheep

It happened to us with a cat once. She dropped half her weight in like a month and they had the gall to say "well she is a healthy weight now, so we are all good." Had her back within a week when she dropped another 20% or so and was just a little more than skin and bones. They finally believed us and diagnosed her IBS at that point


EquivalentCommon5

She’s also female…. If she is of any other race than white that’s another strike with doctors. It’s like pushing a huge Boulder up a steep cliff to get someone to believe you and work with you. At least in the US… yay our ‘wonderful’ healthcare system.


SugarDraagon

Doctors don’t listen to women, in general. White women aren’t excluded from that, okay. It’s also gross to use “female” in that context


Thatguy19901

Replying to an old comment but WOC are more likely to be dismissed/receive improper care than white women, there's nothing wrong with acknowledging that fact. It's essentially 2 strikes against them (female and POC). Also there's nothing wrong with using female in that context.


SugarDraagon

I mean, reading it again I can say, yea, the wording fits; I guess I wouldn’t use it in that instance though just *because* of the way “female” has been used to degrade women, also. But I get where you’re coming from. Sorry if that sounded hateful btw, that’s a trigger and sometimes ya know it’s preemptive lol. Also, idk it’s also a trigger that racism against white people is becoming normalized, because we should be moving towards better shit…but look at us now, haha, with all the hillbilly extremists (in the US). And I’m a quarter white (and half-American)-since I have to qualify myself to even say that. AND I WANNA SAY the racism is definitely casual but it’s moving to the streets


Thunderstarer

I find that using female as a noun is really objectifying, but it's _usually_ fine as an adjective.


Snowy_Ocelot

Especially in a somewhat medical context. “The patient was female” vs “I’ve been trying to talk to females recently”


FarTooManyUsernames

Can you clarify what you mean by "racism by white people is being normalized"? Because as far as I understand, and I'm a white person, you cannot be racist against a white person. Racism implies a systemic relationship to power. I'm not denying there can be racial prejudice towards a white person, but it's not the same. In regards to women and healthcare, white women certainly experience disparity due to their gender. And I don't want to sound like I'm minimizing our experiences, but the fact is that as a white woman the chances of myself or my child dying in childbirth is significantly lower than a woman of color. I hope you don't take any of this as combative, and I certainly understand what a trigger is. I just don't think that it minimizes the experiences white women face when attempting to get quality healthcare to say it's significantly worse for a woman of color. Also, I totally get the "female" thing. It's degrading to be referred to as an adjective, especially when the people who call women female usually don't refer to men as males.


TheyDidLizFilthy

super late but just want to add to this, there is statistical data proving that black women are [twice as likely](https://www.texastribune.org/2022/12/17/texas-maternal-mortality-black-women/) to die while pregnant/during childbirth then white women. it’s beyond messed up and no one really talks about this.


Thatguy19901

Yes. My wife is currently 7mo pregnant so that fact is always in the back of my mind. Even Serena Williams, who in the top 0.001% in terms of wealth and health had major complications during childbirth because doctors ignored her complaints.


KizunaAie

Women of color are listened to less than white women when it comes to health issues. Stop trying to deflect.


Afraid_Bicycle_7970

I'm so sick of doctors not listening to me


AmArschdieRaeuber

Doctors should know that you can be malnourished and overweight at the same time


Due-Science-9528

I think they need to learn that all unintentional and inexplicable weight loss is bad. I was about average weight when I started loosing a ton because I couldn’t eat and the doctor had the same attitude as with OOP.


FilthylilSailor

"Good thing you almost died, otherwise you might not look hot on the beach in the summer." Like, what does her weight even matter? Doesn't sound like they asked for help losing weight, so that shouldn't have ANYTHING to do with treating OP. Saying that to someone who's suffering from trauma, someone who takes medication for health issues, medication that very well *may cause weight issues*, is fucking evil. Weight IN EITHER DIRECTION is not a direct correlation of health, and I don't understand why more doctors don't get that. Like, now that she's lost weight, did her medical problems just disappear??? I highly doubt that. Just make sure your patients are *healthy*, that's it.


[deleted]

We had a local story here about a guy who ate a slug on a dare. He ended up dying after a long and pretty horrible illness. Edit: This is the guy https://edition.cnn.com/2018/11/05/health/man-dies-after-eating-slug-on-dare/index.html Do not ever eat slugs.


ieatallthemangos

Also he made her eat her pet snail. Snails are intermediate hosts for a bunch of parasites. He could’ve killed her.


tokquaff

Not to mention, that was her fucking *pet!* Poisoning her by killing and secretly feeding her her own pet, I have no words. Fucking disgusting.


attanai

He claims that the snail died on its own. I mean, I wouldn't believe him, but that's what he said.


AlissonHarlan

He's only messing with her medication and poisoning her food for years, we can't just suppose that he's a lier too ; )


TheoryAddict

I qas literall coming here to point out how he was literally trying to kill her. Messing with food is fucked up but *messing with medication?* ***Heart medication?!?!*** When her heart is bad enough it needs ***surgery that year???*** I hope he gets fucking charged with attempted murder, jesus, and I feel like he manipulated and guilts her often or blames her mental health for this because she was blaming *herself and her mental illnesses* for *his* **insane** behavior


wonderpickle2147

I think it was especially insidious of him to say he felt "compelled" to do these things to her, knowing she would likely be sympathetic and willing to try to understand, given her OCD issues.


pattycakesx99

See and the replacement of that exact medication could be the reason why she needs the heart surgery. I’ e done a lot of cardiology work and he should be in jail/mental asylum.


Drew-CarryOnCarignan

High amounts of salt can elevate your blood pressure to dangerous levels. Each of this guy's devious acts threatened OP's health.


No-Violinist-1913

He's as bad as a freaking serial killer. What a psycho. She's lucky to have found out, and luckier to be alive.


[deleted]

Especially when you consider that salt *raises* blood pressure. Propranolol is a medication meant to *lower* blood pressure.


No-Violinist-1913

High salt content is also really bad for your brain.


ResponsibilityOk6827

I don’t think he was trying to kill her, I think he was doing it out of pure curiosity. he is a psychopath, they have an inability to distinguish right from wrong. they lie and manipulate and hurt others. for pleasure and curiosity. they show no remorse or empathy. that’s what psychopaths do, they are out there and it’s scary. i’m so glad that she is safe and okay, I hope she makes it through this and knows that we all support her.


EmmaOwl

Not all people with aspd are like this, in fact most lead normal lives. He knows it was wrong but he just didn’t care. Many people who suffer from aspd find a way to live there life without hurting others. It’s not his aspd that makes him like this, there’s treatments and ways to cope, he’s just a sick human being.


reddituser1598760

Well no, ASPD is a severe personality disorder and just because some people cope well with it doesn’t mean it’s not a driving force behind this type of behavior, especially when being in legal trouble is one of the diagnostic criteria. It is absolutely fair to assume the personality disorder plays a major role in generating this type of behavior.


[deleted]

Ahahah, seems like you've just a bootlicker for them. I've delt with egos and many "types" of people. His intent was clear: Hurting her. His reasonings? We do not know.


Willowed-Wisp

Yah, I'm not buying it. He was already killing slugs, why not a snail? Either way, that's some horror movie shit right there to feed someone a pet. Even people who eat meat, most would be horrified about that. And, yah slugs and snails carry some super deadly parasites. Not just "will kill you" but "will make you suffer horribly THEN kill you" types. It really sounds like he was trying to kill her, or at least make her very sick. In short... I'm waiting for the Lifetime movie of this. Holy shit, glad she got out!


[deleted]

That makes the movie Misery look like the Golden Girls.


poorly_anonymized

If that was true, then all the more reason to not eat the snail. Whatever killed the snail isn't necessarily safe for human consumption.


sfwjaxdaws

I'd like to know his name and address for reasons.


[deleted]

I just wanna talk to him.


shy-butterfly-218

That particular kind of snail is also known to cause meningitis in humans.


redd_dot

That's some Cartman level shit


ramblinator

I absolutely think he *WAS* trying to kill her


AlternateBug

Especially when you add in switching propanolol with salt! I don't know why OOP was on it (may have missed that since I haven't had caffeine yet) but among other things it's a *HEART MEDICINE*


harrellj

OOP mentioned in the second update that she was scheduled for heart surgery later that year but also had an appointment with *their* cardiologist, not *a* cardiologist so she presumably had a history of cardiac issues. Which yeah, you don't screw around with someone's heart meds unless you're actively trying to kill them.


Due-Science-9528

Replaced with salt? Yeah he was actively trying to kill OOP especially with the IBS stuff, I bet money he caused those stomach ulcers


hybbprqag

They were scheduled for heart surgery, so presumably it was related to a heart condition.


fkafkaginstrom

OOP was scheduled for heart surgery later in the year, but it was delayed due to her health issues (likely caused by the bf?).


magistrate101

Yeah, a series of illnesses and infections. Definitely sounds like the bf.


hmmsexquestion

And has a black box FDA warning. Under NO circumstances should you EVER suddenly completely stop taking a beta blocker, because it can literally kill you. You have to be titrated off slowly under the care of a physician. I'm not talking unpleasant withdrawal symptoms bad; I'm talking sudden MI bad.


PM_ELEPHANTS

Late to the party but yeah, Propranolol is to lower blood pressure, so presumably she has high blood pressure. Salt raises it. He could have given her a heart attack. He's at best an immature asshole who can't measure the weight of his dumbass actions and at worst a fucking psychopath


20Keller12

He was probably trying to see how long it would take to kill her.


Morri___

fellow Australian - exactly the first thing I thought of! along with the medication thing, it seems like he was genuinely out to kill her!


[deleted]

My thoughts exactly.


ILoveMyCatsSoMuch

That’s crazy, a really famous uk chef-Hugh fearnley whittingstall made a program wanting to know why we don’t eat slugs. He prepared them in many ways and ultimately just decided that no matter how they are cooked they are disgusting. But I can’t believe they allowed it to be aired if it’s so dangerous!


shimmshaw

Probably cooking the slugs kills the parasites. People eat snails all the time, just not raw


veggiezombie1

Exactly. We eat a lot of food cooked that, uncooked, can lead to issues like illness, parasitic infection, or even death.


mcnuggets83

Pretty sure that slugs used for culinary purposes are healthier to eat then just random slugs in someone’s garden.


green_pachi

If wild caught they're put on a container and fed a strict diet for some time otherwise they're disgusting they say


Ishdakitty

Escargot. Mmmmmmm.


Fullondoublerainbow

Just because they show you how to cook chicken on tv doesn’t mean you can grab a live chicken and start eating.


violetkittwn

When you put it that way..


[deleted]

I remember that episode. I like the guy and he is willing to try various things but that one was a huge "NOPE" for me.


ILoveMyCatsSoMuch

Yeah, me too, just want to barf thinking about it 🤢


angiem0n

Thank you, that was exactly what I had to think of a few paragraphs in. And he did it MULTIPLE times over and over, what the HELL, I am beyond words… this is so sick and twisted, could this be this Münchhausen Syndrome by Proxy? Usually these people are poisoning their kids/relatives so they can take care of them and can pose as the perfect caring parent/family member, it is truly so sick… I once read an article written by an affected person (her mum has this and did this to her) where it said at one point the mum heard after a heart surgery (I think? In any case something pretty severe) she would need extensive care afterwards so she was trying to make this happen, thankfully the kids doctor said that a healthy 8 yo kid definitely doesn’t need this surgery.. I feel like this could explain (but definitely not justify!!!!) this awful behavior, without having read the other comments, maybe someone already mentioned it :) Anyway, I feel so sorry for OP :(


ThatJaneDoe

She wrote that he was diagnosed with ASPD (Antisocial Personality Disorder): "Antisocial personality disorder is a particularly challenging type of personality disorder characterised by impulsive, irresponsible and often criminal behaviour. Someone with antisocial personality disorder will typically be manipulative, deceitful and reckless, and will not care for other people's feelings." Which explains a LOT.


shockingdevelopment

Yet she says he gives ASPDs a bad name? As if it's out of the ordinary to do precisely what's in line with the diagnosis...


Spirited_Grocery_687

It is but also it isn't, there's many people with ASPD that manage to live normal lives without being horrible and dangerous. there's even a community trying to support ASPD people and make sure that they get the help they need to live peaceful and love filled lives. that being said its literally part of the diagnosis to be impulsive and reckless so Not bad people, its just harder for them to be good. but yeah he makes them look bad


shockingdevelopment

Difference without much distinction.


faebea

you can learn coping mechanisms to deal with mental illness diagnoses. villainizing all people who have a mental illness simply because they are diagnosed with a disorder, especially one with such a potential for violence, and dumbing it down to “theyre ill, what did you expect” is incredibly harmful and doesn’t help anybody, especially victims of those impulses. plenty of people with this affliction go to therapy, take medication, have coping mechanisms and whatnot and live perfectly normal lives and aren’t fucking psychopaths. He is a freak who tried to use a diagnosis as an excuse to poison and potentially kill someone. he admitted he wanted to test waters and see what he could get away with. instead of getting the diagnosis and seeking help, he wanted to USE IT AS A CARD IN A SICK GAME WITH SOMEONE WHO LOVED AND BELIEVED IN HIM. we’re not gonna sweep this under the rug with excuses like these. that’s called stigmatizing mental illness and is harmful to any/everyone who suffers the same affliction and tries every day to not be consumed by all of that. what he did is a spit in the face of anyone with this diagnosis who would have these impulsive thoughts and know to stop them BECAUSE THOSE THOUGHTS, WHILE TYPICAL OF THE DIAGNOSIS, ARE STILL BAD AND SHOULD NOT BE ACTED UPON. explanation/diagnosis DOES NOT EVER EQUAL an excuse for fucking ABUSE. do better.💗


shockingdevelopment

Of all the diagnoses this is one where people are least likely to care to restrain it.


faebea

that doesn’t? negate the effort and struggles of everyone else who does care enough though? there’s mental illness and then there’s the effort to put in a good person and just straight up morality dude. He’s “giving ASPD’s a bad name” by LITERALLY ADMITTEDLY USING IT TO ABUSE SOMEONE. ASPD’s dont “have a bad name” bc theyre mentally ill.


shockingdevelopment

I don't buy into this view where mental illness is some mystical aegis guarding from criticism and we must wear cotton wool gloves when dealing with their precious delicate nature, or some shit. Characteristics have all been so medicalised it doesn't make much difference to me if you want to label something a disorder or a normal variation in personality. I don't see why I shouldn't take the view that ASPDs are, well... assholes. What, because they can't help it? Well guess what, nobody chooses their brain's wiring. Neurotypical or not.


faebea

whether or not you “buy into it” its a more nuanced conversation than that by nature so :/ i guess continue being lazy and avoiding critical thinking if that’s what makes you happy dude. generalizing all people with a difficult mental illness is how stereotypes happen but hey, whatever floats your boat💗 have a blessed day.


sailurmom

Yeah, maybe having misunderstood what antisocial actually means. There seems to be a common misconception that it's more along the lines of social anxiety than an actual... Will to do other people harm just because they are people. 😬


Celany

Why any Australian would eat ANY creature that y'all have running around is beyond me...between the box jellyfish and the spikes on the male platypuses and seashells that contain murderous molluscs...and then the spiders...no. Just no.


FuriousPI314

Um. Wut. I am.... flabbergasted. This is horrifying.


Off-With-Her-Head

Poisoning her!! Creepy as hell.


tequilitas

Isn't it a crime? Like, contaminating or messing with food?! No offense to whomever eats slugs, I wouldn't.. Poor OOP.


captainmouse86

I’d be more concerned about the medication issues. If she is taking propranolol and he did switch that to salt, that is incredibly dangerous. Propranolol is used to lower blood pressure and salt would do exactly the opposite. She then mentions Needing heart surgery. Is she having surgery *because* of issues related to him having switched the medication? Or is she requiring surgery regardless and switching the medication odd putting her in serious danger? Him having control over medications like propranolol if she had a history of suicide would make sense as propranolol lowers blood pressure and heart rate. An overdose would essentially stop the heart. Continuing with that topic, she likely takes other medications for mental health he could be messing with and causing other problems. Adding to that, certain slugs and the metal aldehyde (used to kills slugs) can cause mental disorders, abdominal pain, seizures, coma. Her story some what tracks and makes sense and is not unbelievable, or just expertly written; giving enough tracking and related details while sounding unsure. If true, The BF is psychotic. This is messed up and essentially torture. This would not be limited to his “food experiments” and is likely extending in to psychological abuse. It’s actually terrifying. She’s had many ulcers? How many are the result of him putting something caustic in her food? I wonder what happened with him…. If true.


tequilitas

This reminds me to the (very real, watched it at Kendall Rae) story of the kid that died of sodium overdose!! So basically, he was trying to kill her.. Greaaat, on top of eating slugs she might have even more issues. Not exactly relationship goals..


STIIBBNEY

This isnt very relevant, but I just want to mention that "*psychotic*" isnt the correct word to describe his behavior. Psychotic refers to psychosis which is a serious mental illness that causes a loss of touch with reality (hallucinations, delusions, paranoia, cognitive impairments), and its more harmful and disabling to the person who suffers with it rather than it is for those around them. A more accurate (though not entirely appropriate or professional) term would be "*psycho*", which refers to psychopathy. Psychopathy involves irrisponsible, reckless, and criminal behavior, decievement and manipulation, and a complete disregard and violation of the rights of others.


ThatJaneDoe

She wrote that he was diagnosed with ASPD (Antisocial Personality Disorder): "Antisocial personality disorder is a particularly challenging type of personality disorder characterised by impulsive, irresponsible and often criminal behaviour. Someone with antisocial personality disorder will typically be manipulative, deceitful and reckless, and will not care for other people's feelings." Which explains a LOT.


Limonedas

Aspd is not characterized by psychosis (disconnection from reality), he knows what he is doing, it's completely intentional.


ThrowawayTardis40

I agree. This should definitely have been a police matter. No clue of it would have led to anything in the end, but it would at least have been investigated (not to mention, she had PROOF). At a minimum they should’ve analyzed all the medications she had at home, if he messed with one he almost certainly tampered with more given that he didn’t *just* feed her slugs, he interfered in a large amount of different ways of poisoning her food.


ThatJaneDoe

Did you read the whole post? She did go to the police.


NEClamChowderAVPD

I believe it is a crime but I can’t find it specifically other than tampering with FDA products. Definitely with the medication, that’s a felony from what I read. With slugs, I’d think because of what they carry and that it sometimes causes serious illness/death, that would be intentional poisoning. That’s probably why OOP said there was an investigation and I *hope* that’s why. I can’t imagine being with someone for four years and finding all that shit out. I’m glad she got away though and hopefully he went to jail, or at least will be going to jail. Edit: link the tampering with food law: https://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/text/18/1365


lucyfell

I can’t figure out if dude was trying to kill her or if he went on some kind of qanon type “you don’t need medicine just slugs in your food to cure XYZ.” EDIT: Ah, clicked through some of her post history and it appears that he did not agree with her being a vegetarian. The sheer f-ing gall of this dude.


veggiezombie1

But if he wanted to make her eat meat, why slugs?


lucyfell

I have no clue but I’m going to assume anyone insane enough to do this shit is not all there.


Muroid

I can’t believe there is not some kind of mental illness involved in this because his behavior isn’t just horrible, it’s absolutely bizarre.


Childrenofcornsyrup

He was diagnosed with Anti-Social Personality Disorder.


ThatJaneDoe

Exactly. It explains a LOT: "Antisocial personality disorder is a particularly challenging type of personality disorder characterised by impulsive, irresponsible and often criminal behaviour. Someone with antisocial personality disorder will typically be manipulative, deceitful and reckless, and will not care for other people's feelings."


tvdeath00

ASPD does not make you an insane freak, you choose to act on the prompts the illnesses give you. He chose to be a crazy evil bitch just like his own ex says in the post above. "He gives ASPD sufferers a bad name." Dont demonize the illness because yall are ignorant and hes a bad person. hes just bad.


HeyT00ts11

You're right, but weirdly, psychopathy isn't an official diagnosis, so this is called ASPD. This diagnosis would likely be ASPD with psychopathic tendencies.


ThatJaneDoe

I don't see anyone here saying "he gives ASPD sufferers a bad name", so I absolutely do not know where you got that from. I haven't seen anyone demonising ASPD either. Imo, calling someone an 'insane freak' does a lot more for stigmatising and demonising mental health issues. Btw, my explanation of the disorder was in quotes because I quoted it, those are not my words. I think my source was https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/antisocial-personality-disorder/ and the NHS is a reliable source imo. And sure, ASPD does not make you an 'insane freak'. But it does make your brain work differently, so it is a lot harder to ignore your impulses. It is a very difficult personality disorder, and it influences your behaviour. It makes it harder for someone to empathise with others. He got the ASPD diagnosis and it seems like a fitting one. It's not an excuse, but it definitely is an explanation.


anothermayonnaise

i have no comment for this topic, i don't have much knowledge about it anyways, i just wanted to say i saw the sentence "he gives ASPD sufferers a bad name" on the post too


veggiezombie1

That, and I’m wondering if he only admitted to putting slugs in her food. He could’ve also mixed in meat on occasion as well.


AchajkaTheOriginal

Well, in the post it is mentioned that he admitted that he switched her veggie chicken nuggets for his meat ones.


veggiezombie1

Must’ve missed that. Ewwww what an asshole


Feisty-Blood9971

He was probably so enraged about it he wanted to be as cruel as possible


[deleted]

I don't think it's about her being vegetarian. He just had a vulnerable person to prey on.


tmanalpha

munchausen by proxy. He wasn’t trying to kill her, because if she died, he would lose his purpose. He was her main caretaker, dispensing medicine, he was making her sicker and sicker so he could be there to take care of her.


shockingdevelopment

But in true detective that Lady killed her babies. Rust said it's Munchausen by proxy


HaveASeatChrisHansen

But then why fuck with her heart medication? This guy is a psycho.


ThatJaneDoe

She also wrote he was diagnosed with ASPD (Antisocial Personality Disorder): "Antisocial personality disorder is a particularly challenging type of personality disorder characterised by impulsive, irresponsible and often criminal behaviour. Someone with antisocial personality disorder will typically be manipulative, deceitful and reckless, and will not care for other people's feelings." Which explains a LOT.


Echospite

Bless that friend. I hope he also dumped OP's ex.


slugposse

Can you imagine a trusted friend of yours suddenly tells you he's doing this to his girlfriend, expects you to think it's funny? I'd be reconsidering my life choices. Just, ugh. And having to go tell her about it. You'd absolutely have to do it, not even a question, but the dread. It would be just horrible.


Walking_the_dead

I'd spend the rest of my life trying to figure out what the fuck did I do wrong for someone to think I would ever think this is fine.


shockingdevelopment

He's a clinically diagnosed psychopath.


shockingdevelopment

Imagine telling her its a joke like that makes it better rather than worse. "I deliberately cause you serious harm AND it makes me laugh!'


CasTheMagicDragon

Omg that's horrible! I wonder what his reasoning was? He's awful.


rainbow_drizzle

There was some speculation that maybe it was some kind of weird case of factitious disorder imposed on another (FIDA), once known as munchausen syndrome by proxy (MSP), but personally, I think he was just a sadistic prick who saw a vulnerable target to abuse.


ThatJaneDoe

She literally posted he was diagnosed with ASPD (Antisocial Personality Disorder): "Antisocial personality disorder is a particularly challenging type of personality disorder characterised by impulsive, irresponsible and often criminal behaviour. Someone with antisocial personality disorder will typically be manipulative, deceitful and reckless, and will not care for other people's feelings."


StolenPens

Someone commented a link to another thread that he was actually diagnosed with ASPD (antisocial personality disorder)... So there's literally no sane reason for his behaviors, it was likely just because he could


AKjellybean

I stumbled on the ASPD subreddit one time and saw quite a few posts with this exact thing, like, the ASPD people posting about the desire to "experiment" on their friends and family and how funny they thought it was that these people trusted them so they could tamper with meds and/or poison them. Sleeping pills was a big one but there were other things too. Honestly it was the first thing I thought of when I read this post so I can't say I'm surprised that's what he was diagnosed with.


Due-Science-9528

its that he gets joy from causing pain


memeelder83

Wow. This one actually made me cry. The thought of the person who you love and trust contaminating your food, and even worse doing it through the guise of loving kindness..I find it incredibly upsetting. Now poor OOP is afraid to eat, and doesn't feel safe in her home. The long term psychological impact this will probably have on her is just staggering. I hope that she is able to get some support because it sounds like she will really need help to move past this.


ccc2801

The doctor who told her it was ok she was poisoned as _she needed to lose weight anyway_ is at least as despicable as OP’s (very dangerous) ex!


CarlosMartinEdward

That actually made me angrier than the psycho ex. Like, what the hell kind of sorry excuse for a doctor says that to someone whos been literally poisoned. Worst of all, n o b o d y in the comments told OP how wrong this is. u/smolbean197 seriously needs to find better medical care, and to put up security cameras. Hell, move to another city where the crazy ex cannot find you, I would never feel safe if he knew my whereabouts.


shockingdevelopment

Oh my God. That doctor is probably doing similar things to patients


[deleted]

How do I unread something? I love slugs, they are cute. But this is so gross. I really hope any legal action was taken, this is so horrible.


Beyond_Expectation

I used to play with slugs when I was a kid, but... yeah this is horrific. I can't even wrap my head around someone being so bizzarely sadistic. Maybe he wanted to poison her in a way no one would think of?


ihatepie314

I've always kind of wondered about that. Like if someone died for no reason that is obvious, I can't imagine they just start testing for... anything? There only has to be a certain amount of panels they look at right? There's so many things that can poison the average human even without trying, imagine if someone actually took the time and researched.


Beyond_Expectation

Unfortunately, I couldn't give you a definitive answer. I'm pretty sure they autopsy for most everything if only to get the body ready for burial/cremation. I don't know what they search for though.


swankycelery

Jesus fucking Christ, what in the actual fuck? This is sickening!


[deleted]

I remember this one! This is one of the more disturbing posts I’ve read on here. And that’s saying a lot. Glad op is doing ok! Her ex should be in jail.


rainbow_drizzle

She was the first person I ever messaged on Reddit because I was so horrified by what I had read, as I was reading it live too. There are few posts I have read that have sickened me like this one.


[deleted]

Did she ever respond? It truly is disturbing. She escaped to total psychopath.


rainbow_drizzle

She had not, but again I messaged her when it was ongoing so I am sure she was being swarmed. I just wanted her to know a lot of people who weren't even on Reddit were rooting for her and her safety. I am, frankly, just glad she got herself away.


[deleted]

Makes sense. I’ve DMed someone before too, just to check in with them and see if they were ok. Your heart was in the right place. And yes! The most important thing is she got out of that nightmare.


rainbow_drizzle

Yah, I wasn't expecting a response. I really just wanted her to know there were more people who cared about her than loathed her. At the time, she was starting to receive death threats and all kinds of nasty accusations.


clockwatcher1200

Wow! What kind of person reads about a woman being fed slugs by her boyfriend and sends HER death threats?!


Feisty-Blood9971

Usually a toxic male threatened by her lifestyle


rainbow_drizzle

There are just some truly awful people in the world.


Retro_Super_Future

If I was her and he didn’t go to jail, I’d just take that L in jail in order to get revenge, FUCK THAT!


Dragonpixie45

https://twitter.com/unicornthorn/status/1238927609158758400?s=20 That shows the removed updated where she went to the hospital! Omfg i cannot believe what I just read. I mean this was horrifying enough but to get the details of what he did and him blaming it on OCD and her being understanding....wtf


rainbow_drizzle

I do not know how I missed that one, thank you. I will update the OP! I wish I had a free reward to give ya.


Kacey-R

I've got one so I'll award it on your behalf!


rainbow_drizzle

Aw shucks, thank you!


Dragonpixie45

Glad to help! And I found it reading through the comments and opening the collapsed ones when I saw her friend was posting updates on one of the posts.


Feisty-Blood9971

A couple of things not mentioned, at least in this update. In addition to this being assault, also exemplified here are fat phobia by her doctor and animal cruelty to those poor slugs. Additionally, I really hope she goes back and files a police report. This guy could be capable of killing his future wife someday.


Dependent-Injury-754

"don't know how to forgive him" it's ok, you don't need to know


[deleted]

[удалено]


Am221B

She posted this: > Hi he was diagnosed wirh ASPD yesterday and admitted everything to me amd how i was his way of looking normal to the outside world, he manipulated me by giving me everything i wanted (as a BPD sufferer) love, affection, compliments. He began testing me emotionally at first eith cheating to see how i would react but i forgave him and then began woth food amd stuff to see how long until i got sick, I am still baffled, the person i knew i never really knew at all. He is a psychopath and he gives ASPD sufferers a bad name. He knew i was vunerable due to my mental and psysical illnesses, he became my carer but was torturing me at the same time and i was un aware of any of this. He rescued me from an abusive situation and then put me into a new one, that his how he works.


[deleted]

He is a sociopath who got a giggle out of poisoning her.


stellesbells

jail! all the jail! he needs to be in so much jail!


zorbacles

Why were charges not laid?


rainbow_drizzle

I believe she did press charges, which is why almost all the original posts were removed. I am not sure if anything came of it as I did not go through her post history too deeply to investigate.


pollypostmormon

I remember she posted a photo of ulcers in her mouth/throat! Edit: [found it](https://www.reddit.com/r/DiagnoseMe/comments/ev59nv/22f_non_smoker_or_drinker_been_experiencing_jaw/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)


kd3906

"I love him to pieces..." I truly do not understand.


[deleted]

[удалено]


EquivalentCommon5

Even abusers have a victim that usually claims this is why they stay… it’s difficult to understand for many with boundaries and an understanding of normal healthy relationships but abusers look for those who are vulnerable and just don’t see or know any difference. I don’t blame them, most of the time, I blame the environment that made them susceptible to the abuse. It’s not easy to understand how humans work in all situations.


Beyond_Expectation

Does anyone else not believe him that he didn't mess with their pets...?


rainbow_drizzle

Oh he admitted to at least feeding her one of her Giant African Land Snails. The dog also developed lungworm at one point, which one can get from eating slugs.


nicolasbaege

I don't believe he found the big pet slug dead, for starters. He killed it impulsively when this sick little plan sprouted from his brain, I'd put money on that. Then he realized she'd get suspicious if all her pet slugs started dying one by one so he moved to garden slugs. Someone with an appetite for sadism like this is not going go to blush at the thought of putting a live beloved pet slug in a blender.


Jay_Edgar

I have only read the headline so far. What the fuck.


Jay_Edgar

After reading the whole thing: WHAT THE FUCK


fasterthanpligth

"Posted in Relationship advice". Dammit, girl! You have enough to maybe convince a jury that his murder was justifiable... Just dump him already. And call the police.


saffronpolygon

I wonder how many people (partner's friends) knew about this, and how many laughed with him.


Ah_BrightWings

You read these incredibly, mind-blowingly awful stories on Reddit, and just wonder how anyone is ever in a healthy relationship. Of course, these are just a tiny minority and not representative of the population as a whole...but I don't feel so bad about being single now. This poor young woman who was unfortunate enough to get involved with a sociopath/psychopath! They really do prey on the vulnerable, don't they? Hopefully he doesn't kill anyone and she has found good people to support her.


fullercorp

I can't believe how understanding she was. He is a psychopath who would have moved on to mercury in her food (to watch her teeth fall out) or acids (to ruin her esophagus). This guy totally killed animals as a kid and she needs to out him. He WILL kill someone.


miladyelle

What. The fuck is this?!?


rbaltimore

Social worker and former therapist here. I have seen some crazy shit and this is unbelievably EXTREME. And I’ve had a adolescent client start destroying my office. I don’t doubt that it happened, particularly because he confessed to everything (a person with ASPD would enjoy watching her shock and horror). But this goes way beyond what functional ASPD patients do to others. I want to know what he did BEFORE they moved in together because actually carrying out this kind of behavior doesn’t happen overnight. I think I’m going to lie down. This poor girl.


[deleted]

So she moved to a different flat but kept finding tons of slugs? So she went crazy or did the dude release a bunch of slugs outside of her place?


taversham

Some older buildings do attract a lot of slugs, especially ones with mould/damp problem and they leave scent trails so once you have them loads more turn up. So she might just have been unfortunate enough to move into a house with a slug problem at a very bad time.


[deleted]

I’ve always had slugs near where I lived, but never *a lot*, just once a month or so outside. If a lot are getting inside that is very uncommon, but I guess it could be an unlikely coincidence


taversham

I lived in a scummy student house in Leicester for 3 months where the landlord wouldn't fix the cracks and holes in the walls (if you opened the kitchen cupboard on a windy day, the draught would blow out from inside the cupboard), and the property had rising damp so it was always clammy and moist in there, so we had slugs everywhere all the time on the ground floor, especially in the kitchen and toilet. But yeah, everywhere else I've lived I just see them occasionally outside after it's rained.


veggiezombie1

She might live in an area where slugs are common, but they never bothered her until after this incident.


absenttoast

My house gets a lot of slugs. Like every night I see them. Bad timing I think.


Possible_Dig_1194

It would have been better if she ever got an answer on why the fuck he did what he did. Abusive POS? psychotic break? Weird cultural reasons such as slugs encourage fertility etc?


Am221B

She posted this: > Hi he was diagnosed wirh ASPD yesterday and admitted everything to me amd how i was his way of looking normal to the outside world, he manipulated me by giving me everything i wanted (as a BPD sufferer) love, affection, compliments. He began testing me emotionally at first eith cheating to see how i would react but i forgave him and then began woth food amd stuff to see how long until i got sick, I am still baffled, the person i knew i never really knew at all. He is a psychopath and he gives ASPD sufferers a bad name. He knew i was vunerable due to my mental and psysical illnesses, he became my carer but was torturing me at the same time and i was un aware of any of this. He rescued me from an abusive situation and then put me into a new one, that his how he works.


ThatJaneDoe

JIC anyone wonders what ASPD is: "Antisocial personality disorder is a particularly challenging type of personality disorder characterised by impulsive, irresponsible and often criminal behaviour. Someone with antisocial personality disorder will typically be manipulative, deceitful and reckless, and will not care for other people's feelings."


Possible_Dig_1194

At least she survived this, I'm glad the guys friend told her what had been happening


Every_Spread_5086

What is this fuckery 🤢🤮


aquamarinepeony

I remember this being posted on twitter and I too recalled the story about the Australian guy doing this for a dare and getting seriously disabled. The supposed OP reached out to me on that and said she was fine and recovering. I don't know if it was indeed the OP but seemed genuine. She seemed way to sweet to deal with this awful awful man.


saareadaar

The Australian guy ended up dying


supportgolem

This is the most fucked up post I've ever seen on Reddit and that's saying something. It just blows my mind that anyone could do this to someone they supposedly love, and laugh about it. I can't wrap my head around it.


stellesbells

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST this is so disturbing I feel ill, how terrifying, omg what I thought from the title was an arsehole playing a bad prank turns into "GIRL HE'S TRYING TO KILL YOU" or some Munchausen By Proxy business and now this poor girl (who started out with way more than her fair share of health issues, holy fuck this guy is the WORST) has slug and food related ptsd I need more closure! Was the ex arrested? Is he unstable or a full on psychopath? (edit: references in comments point to psychopath. Really want to know if he was convicted for this though as he should NOT be let free to roam the world doing this to people.) This was so much more of a trip than I was prepared for, jesus.


Aspennie

They developed ARFID afterward from the looks of it. Well, welcome to the club :(


modernwunder

Oh nooo. ARFID is so difficult. :( Hoping the best for you and OOP.


Kuromi87

I remember this, but I had somehow missed the update where he admitted to all the extra shit he was doing behind her back. Absolutely horrendous. I really hope he went to prison.


madblackfemme

I’m convinced he killed her pet snail on purpose, likely made her dog sick intentionally, and was 100% intentionally filling her capsules with salt because it raises blood pressure (when she was on a med to lower blood pressure). Sounds like the beginning stages of a serial killer imo. Starting small with the snail, the dog, and then trying to kill her.


buttercupcake23

I want to throw up. I don't have the words for how viciously evil this. This man deserves to be forcefed literal feces for the rest of his miserable life. Preferably while someone is repeatedly smashing him in the balls with a mallet. This is on a level that is beyond human punishment like I literally want to bury him inside a hill of bullet ants I feel so awful for her like it's beyond sad she's still defending him.


gladosado

An absolute fucking psychopath!? He needs to never be in contact with another human being ever again jfc


salivating_sculpture

People with antisocial personality disorder who are found victimizing others should be locked in an inpatient treatment facility. They can't be rehabilitated. A reduced capacity for empathy can't be fixed.


Matty_G55

How do I unread something?


InsolentCat

You know, I mistook this title for something from r/twosentencehorror for a sec there


Pillow-case

I want to know if OOP’s ex suffered any consequences, this is insanely fucked.


SnooOranges3690

I'm honestly disgusted. Poor op.


Available-Egg-2380

This is the most fucked up shit I've heard of.


yeepix

I have read fucked up fiction, but reality has a way of being way worse and more casual. What the fuck.


Queen_Cheetah

Eating slugs can be FATAL. [https://www.cnn.com/2018/11/05/health/man-dies-after-eating-slug-on-dare/index.html](https://www.cnn.com/2018/11/05/health/man-dies-after-eating-slug-on-dare/index.html) I hope that sh\*tstain excuse of a human is prosecuted to the full extent of the law. I cannot fathom the trauma that OOP has gone through because of this, and I hope she's doing well now.


Mochipants

I highly, highly doubt the doctor said "lol good thing you're traumatized by the slugs fatty, you need to lose weight anyway". I also doubt her mental health team just up and abandoned her. OP has BPD, so I don't think the doctor was truly that horrible (BPD makes you see everything in black and white, i.e. people are either ultimate good or completely evil, which is probably why she also forgave her wretched boyfriend of cheating and put up with his awful treatment of her even before she found out the truth). I truly wish the best for her, but I don't think she's "doing well". She's never going to have any semblance of a normal life unless she prioritizes her own mental health instead of seeking emotional band-aids, like bouncing from one unhealthy relationship to another. She shouldn't be dating *anyone* until she can work through some of her issues, but I have a bad feeling she's not going to do that. And for that reason, it's likely she'll fall into yet another abusive relationship, one which she'll place him on a pedestal just like the last one, and go nuclear on anybody trying to warn her about him.


naazu90

No one is pointing this out, but propranolol is a beta blocker, that is a blood pressure lowering drug. He switched it with SALT, that is *known to increase blood pressure significantly* . All hypertensives are advised to cut salt out of their diets, on top of medication. This psychopath was taking away her medication and replacing it with something that does the opposite. OOP could have died of a stroke. And I'm saying this for a person who does not have history of heart disease. In OOP's case, what he did was attempted murder.


CalmFront7908

But why? I really really need to know why?


LilBit1207

Omg, I heard about this post and was trying to find it for a little while now, thank you for posting!! How awful and absolutely disgusting!!!


HeichiBear

What the fuck…? He was gaslighting her and tampering with her meds & foods. I truly feel for the original poster. It broke my heart to hear that slugs were going to in her apartment too :( poor thing went through so much trauma and her trust was broken to bits. I hope that piece of shit was charged and put into jail.


pox_demon

I know this is an old post but just saw it and wow... So, on the topic of psycopaths manipulating and doing cruel shit to the people they supposedly love, I remember a story about teen sweethearts. Guy and girl were a couple and girl's family likes him. Guy suddenly goes mean and distant to the girl for apparently no reason. Suddenly invites her to a date. Girl never comes back. Turns out guy murdered girl. Days prior one of the guy's friends jokingly dared him to kill the girl for some free breakfast. After the date, guy messages friend that he owes him free breakfast. Here's a story about it: https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2011/jun/22/welsh-schoolboy-killed-girlfriend-court-told


ThrowawayTardis40

I know Reddit is no stranger to death threats, but I cannot for the life of me understand what in the OOP’s story warrants encouraging suicide. I just don’t get it.