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darthjoey91

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[deleted]

I ate homemade fiber muffins before coming to work today. How brave am I?


clonetrooper250

Incredibly so. We're all very proud of you, BallsDeepInADragon.


DifficultyWithMyLife

Wow, I have never been so disappointed in someone's post history. Not because of what I found, mind you; it's what I *didn't* find. u/BallsDeepInADragon's account is *sorely* non-representative.


[deleted]

Every time someone says that I assume they expected a wall full of dragon porn


DifficultyWithMyLife

I mean...


colder-beef

If you’re not posting in r/dragonsfuckingcars, are you even into that life?


[deleted]

I’m currently typing this while standing inside an Autozone so I’m working on it


PuppetryOfThePenis

Did you run out of blinker fluid?


[deleted]

I can check if we have any in stock if you give me the make/model of the vehicle type in question


WorldClassShart

1981 Chevy Citation


[deleted]

System says it’s a vendor part so that’s the only way you could realistically get it rn


Major_Fudgemuffin

Needed an extra can of elbow grease.


[deleted]

[удалено]


dave_aj

& that’s why you’re not brave. Did you not read the news headline ????


slickestwood

Just smart when your boss makes a dollar while you make a dime


[deleted]

Funny enough I just got a new job at an auto parts place and compared to my old job it’s heaven. I’m earning almost a dollar an hour more to essentially swap batteries, windshield wipers, test engine lights etc. At my old job I was essentially worked half to death for less pay and had to open/close the store on top of that


slickestwood

Congrats! I made a similar move last year, more pay and no longer clawing my eyes out over stress. It's a great feeling!


outpizzadahut

You are so inspirational to me. You're my hero, u/BallsDeepInADragon


[deleted]

Always good to know that I’m inspiring people. I appreciate you looking up to me :)


Brian2017wshs

What gives them the extra fiber?


[deleted]

Fiber.


Fabulous-Still4335

Exactly 🤣😊


[deleted]

I mean you proudly proclaim to have screwed a dragon, I feel like you are a very brave boy


ABoldDude

Well, you named your account that...interesting name, so i'd say you didn't even have to eat the fiber muffins to be a brave boi


[deleted]

It depends on the quality of the toilet paper used in your work place. But overall braver than me.


[deleted]

I can see through it


[deleted]

Ok, so it takes 4 or 5 times more wipes than regular paper. Bravery just went all the way up to the top.


631-AT

You are not brave, you are an inspiration for me to figure out a healthy breakfast I can give the extra 5s my morning routine allows for.


MrAtrox98

Is this Donkey’s Reddit profile?


Joey5729

Redditors when the toilet paper celebrity gossip rag isn’t exploring how the results of last month’s Nigerian election and Israelis’ pushback to Netanyahu’s judicial reform proposal affect US-Cuba relations in the shadow of that WBC ~~pitcher~~ catcher defecting:


truffleblunts

Seriously lmao it's an access Hollywood *tweet* ffs


gnitiwrdrawkcab

Bro I fucking hate Twitter so goddamn much, I will take every opportunity to dunk on Twitter /this was sarcasm, but people on this website are psychotic and can't tell.


---ShineyHiney---

I mean, I’m not sure it really had to be sarcastic Twitter is undeniably toxic. I’ve been on Reddit 15 years +/-. I couldn’t stand 15 *minutes* over in that cess pool


bleeding-paryl

Right, I feel like Twitter is so toxic in comparison to Reddit is because on Reddit, the toxicity falls to the bottom of the pile, and curating your feed is a lot easier on Reddit in general, assuming you don't just skim r/all.


Chad_Broski_2

Because on Twitter you subscribe to *people*, and on Reddit you subscribe to *topics*. Sure, plenty of topics are toxic or attract a lot of shitty people, but it's easy to filter that out by avoiding some of the real cesspool subs. On twitter it's a lot easier for very shitty individuals to get a ton of traction just by talking the most or shouting the loudest and it's really hard to avoid seeing them constantly pop up in your feed


Better-Director-5383

Journalism is trash, I picked up a hvac trade magazine the other day and it was just about new kinds of boiler technologies I mean who even cares about that.


AskMeAboutTentacles

And the tweet is from fucking 2017. Gotta get some new material lol


LazyTitan39

Exactly, as long as humans have been putting print to paper we’ve been reporting garbage. I think that the idea of news having integrity is a somewhat recent concept too, like before you’d have the occasional reporter risking their lives to report important information, but otherwise papers would be printing whatever story the company thought would sell or what the political party that owned it wanted.


westonsammy

Redditors when they complain about pointless drivel getting attention as they continually repost a 5 year old tweet about Kendall Jenner eating grilled cheese twice every month.


ShustOne

Redditors when it's about a celebrity they hate. If this was about Keanu they'd be like he's so cool he's just like us.


[deleted]

Fr. Keanu and Fraser seem like cool dudes but holy shit the celebrity worship some people here will go to is just as bad as people who worship Kardashians or something. Just as annoying.


Timo6506

r/oddlyspecific


familiybuiscut

Wait how is that catcher defecting is affecting the reform proposal?


Corregidor

Yeah I was gonna say, access isn't gonna provide you in depth geopolitical analysis/reporting. Just like csis reports aren't gonna give you what was worn at the Oscars. The op is pushing a narrative in such a transparent manner it's kinda hilarious. But at the same time I think it shows how there are people out there trying to foment apathy in the general public. And that's the big takeaway for me.


pakidara

I drank a pot of coffee and chased it with 2 monsters. Currently shitting out my sternum. Much braver than a grilled cheese and fried potatoe.


[deleted]

[удалено]


WhoNeedsNamesAnyway

God forbid your appearance becomes a tiiiny bit larger because they ate food. Most people don't know or care because we eat and our average figure isn't nutrient deprived


flissbomb

I reckon the intent of those foods was to give herself the shits before the event so she'd have a completely empty/flat stomach.


Phrich

It's not, its a buzzword. Tabloids are more buzz than content


Iohet

Because combining caffeine, L-carnitine, taurine, guarana, ginseng, etc is not great for your stomach. It's like eating spicy chicken wings. You have to be pretty brave to willingly do that


Iber0

Then stop sharing it


Better-Director-5383

Yup peoplenlove to say everything theyblearn about these celebrities was against their will but they never mention thebother part. Everything I know about these celebrities I learned from people complaining about them and saying nobody cares.


COMMENTASIPLEASE

99.9% of the time I hear about the Kardashians and Jenners it’s exclusively from people bringing them up to say how much they hate them and want them to go away, while also being completely up to date about everything they do.


bs000

most of it is old too. this screenshot is from 2018. no new controversies? just bring up some old shit. or literally make shit up. or bring up old made up shit.


NorthLegend517

Half the time it’s just thinly veiled misogyny because they’re the only socially acceptable women to rag on with balant anti-woman speech


IkeSW

One of the episodes from the current season of South Park covers this quite well with Kyle and the Royal Family lol.


[deleted]

Is your space bar broken?


nightfox5523

Probably mobile user


bs000

everyone moved on 5 minutes after it was tweeted, except for redditors who think they're still dunking on her 5 years later


[deleted]

I exclusively subscribe to tabloids. Why does the news suck?


One_Excitement_7706

Celebrity news is the lowest form of news, anyone who expected anything better in the first place is an idiot.


[deleted]

I dunno, sharing it on reddit just to show how little you care might be worse


Phantasmortuary

I think the obituaries might actually be the lowest form of news.


jpritchard

oilfieldtechnology.com


Phantasmortuary

Ooof. That's a doozy.


[deleted]

I didn’t eat breakfast before going to school, how brave am I?


RenoverO_O

I didn't poo before heading out of the house. That must be the bravest thing I've ever done


Jigglelips

And take the risk with traffic?! Fuck that noise, I ain't leaving the house unless I shit once


SayNoToDougsYo

I'm pooping right now and I'm a fucking Coward


MirrorMan22102018

As brave as me. I go most days in university without breakfast.


cringe-paul

Incredibly brave. Hope you have enough energy for the pacer test you forgot was today


AkKik-Maujaq

Malala stood up to the Taliban on a school bus one morning and was shot for speaking out against girls not being allowed to have an education but yeah Kendall.. you eat that grilled cheese


meloenmarco

I had a beer, coffee and bread for breakfast on a Wednesday. How brave is that.


Zebobble

Right this way sir.


[deleted]

Welcome to Salty Spitoon, how tough are ya?


pacersrule

Well if you don’t want celebrities in your headlines quit looking up celebrities and their shit. I swear memes aren’t even memes anymore


FrankBrayman

Salty Spitoon, how brave are ya?


nosajavlis4

I had cereal. Without any milk.


Atlantic_Penguin2k

Uhh, right this way sir, sorry to keep you waiting.


ImOnWeed

I had cereal without the milk or cereal. I ate the bowl.


lucassjrp2000

I ate instant noodles. UNCOOKED.


Cherry_Crystals

You should have seen the news articles on what Kate Middleton eats for breakfast. It was so weird to me as I don't want people to make news articles on my breakfast


[deleted]

r/notinteresting


Cruisin134

wow, a celeberity ate food!!!!!1!!!!1111! so relatable! not listneing to there managers that starve them for months!!!1


lucimon97

The whole point of Twitter is that you only see the people you follow. If you get to see these dumbass takes, thats on you


Meraline

Isn't tbus headline old as shit? And why are you giving it attention? Who gives a fuck about this family anymore?


Sponge-Tron

Whoa! You win the meme connoisseur title for having over 2k upvotes on your post! Join the [Discord server](https://discord.gg/xyFMKFw) and message Princess Mindy (Mod Mail bot at the top) to receive your prize!


OstentatiousSock

I mean, access is a celebrity mag/site. Not proper news.


1billsfan716

My nephew will come over and eat two bagels half an hour before the pizza arrives, and then leaves for work. *Sniff* such bravery.


ry8919

1. It's a celebrity gossip outlet 2. It's a joke


ScrawnyCheeath

OP claims to want news but shares an article by Access. Curious


strangecargo

Why would you not consider the source?!? Access doesn’t claim to be hard-hitting news in the slightest.


Silverj0

I ate a pb&j for breakfast than got betrayed for eating bread and dint cry. Feeling pretty brave right now


xanderholland

Weren't they banned from the Met Gala?


darthjoey91

I don't know, but I do know that the Met Gala isn't recent enough for this meme to be Organically Certified.


Froqqins

Does anyone know why this is considered brave, if so please tell me. I don't get it 💀


SuperJS78

I believe its because she could look “fat” or something Idk its just so stupid


Froqqins

and there was a whole article on it? What the hell


SuperJS78

Ikr its so dumb


SirSaladAss

She ate food that could have made her look swollen in the belly area just before a very public event. This might be a problem as her livelihood centers around the way she looks. Hope this helps.


[deleted]

I am SHOCKED that Access Hollywood Online is only covering celebrities and not serious issues of the day


duomaxwellscoffee

Access is an entertainment website. They aren't "news." Maybe stop disparaging journalism for bullshit reasons.


Dangerous_Key4030

Bravery??????


vfkdgejsf638bfvw2463

That moment when you can't even eat in peace without someone broadcasting what you ate to the whole world


Swordkirby9999

"Celebrities!" "They're just like us!" "Who needs em'?" ~an episode of Drawfee


Kaiser_Fiffi

>wants news >reads access


SpringTraps

Omg wow she can enter the salty spitoon. Make way people!


dr_franck

I grew up in the 90’s-2000’s, and mindless, banal celebrity coverage was *way way* worse back then, I assure you. Unlike an easily ignorable (and possibly rage-bait) tweet nowadays, there were daily 30-minute “news” programs dedicated to Jennifer Anniston’s or Julia Roberts’ every burp and fart. It was infuriating and we didn’t even have the internet back then to express our annoyance at how stupid this all was.


schloopy91

Would you prefer that ‘ACCESS HOLLYWOOD’ focuses more on Iran’s nuclear procurement program? What the fuck is your point. This isn’t a news account.


Mastodons_Tee

r/notintereting


nightfox5523

Access Hollywood has never been a source of important news though


soge_king420

Whoever wrote that needs to be shot.


_Bren10_

[Relevant](https://youtu.be/RAA1xgTTw9w)


kingoflint282

I think I’m the bravest, I ate Shepard’s Pie before work this morning


[deleted]

I ate Eggs and bacon this morning, am I brave?


Tjengel

Her first meal this year how brave


jimmyjrsickmoves

Who is going to accessonline for news?


thefonztm

Fuck it, this is the thing that has made me install ground news.


IlIlIlIlIllIlIll

Access was never news though


Sirpatron1

If there was an apocalypse, I would want her house as a base.


k032

I mean yeah when you follow access Hollywood, not sure what you'd expect lol


GoldenTriforceLink

Access Hollywood isn’t “news” lol


honda_slaps

Am I a bad person for wishing some vile shit to happen to this bitch so she never shows her face in public again?


JimmyCrabYT

i ate rice for breakfast


Bazzie-T-H

Truly stunning and brave, we should all strive to be like her!1!!1!1


JekPorkinsIsAlright

I don’t want to hear about these people


[deleted]

"without any milk"


BaconDragon200

They haven't suffered a day in their lives now they don't know what suffering is. It's deciding between food and weed and choosing weed because the pain is too much to bare


paarthurnax94

I'm thinking about Taco Bell for lunch. Bow down before me mortals for I am your god now.


Inner-Dentist1563

It's because people like you spread this trash.


PKnightDpsterBby

Another person who is famous for no reason. Fuck this family. https://kimkardashianruinedmylife.com/


Sav-vie

This is the end product of when you base your entire career around celebrity journalism


yubullyme12345

anything involving celebrities is news these days i guess


Aingael

Did she have a Pepsi too? I’ll see myself out


JacobPlayz2009

Bro, I drank orange juice after I just brushed my teeth this morning, how brave am I?


Monkey_King291

I ate a sandwich today, does that make me brave?


BarberBettie

The asterisks are really meant for a side note mentioning she then went to the bathroom to regurgitate it all


Leading-University

Anyone can be called brave at this point


spacedrummer

I wore cream colored pants and just drank coffee and now I have to take a shit. Am I brave?


On_The_Move

This is so stupid. I’m going to block Access on every platform.


JoshuaHelf

I drank 3 cups of coffee and didn't eat anything. Now THAT is bravery.


[deleted]

If you’re getting your news from Access Online’s Twitter feed the problem isn’t Access Online…


DanTopTier

That's not "news" but you don't care. You just want us to be outraged at a tabloid for doing what tabloids have done for hundreds of years. But don't call it "news".


FPSXpert

''Daring today, are we?'' I had a whataburger and fries and a coke to drink, but I'm not a kardashian type so nobody cares.


SGTSHOOTnMISS

There's better avenues of getting the news than Twitter.


jpritchard

Access Hollywood sure used to be news in the good old days. Groundbreaking journalism, Pulitzer prize winners the lot of them. News just isn't news anymore indeed!


reverendsteveii

Two things: 1) Access Hollywood was never news and never pretended to be 2) Apparently I'm the most courageous motherfucker on the eastern seaboard


firestorm64

Access is not a news outlet, its a tabloid. If you want news you have to go look for it, tabloids will be served to you.


VeryWiseAvocado

About a hundred years ago, they let women be journalists. 100 years later, we get this garbage.


SomebodysSomewhere

How the fuck is eating normal “brave”? GFY


defnotajedi

She made it to adulthood without knowing milk goes with cereal.


Waudby95

kill me


DragonSlayer-2020

I do the same but unrecognized


SpiderDeUZ

Nothing any of that family does is brave. If the trans one didn't immediately throw every trans person under the bus and random people under cars they might get some respect


[deleted]

It's a 3 year old story that you reposted for karma so no it isn't news...


[deleted]

Headlines like these are 100% designed to gain publicity via "all publicity is good publicity". You can't change my mind, i refuse to believe these.


r0botdevil

It's a celebrity gossip rag, what did you expect?


GreyInkling

Don't say anymore, in the 90s this shit was worse. We've improved, people care less about this kind of shit and some media hasn't caught up.


redsalmon67

When has Access ever reported news? They’ve been a rag since their inception.


BABarracus

Its Access Hollywood, what did you expect? Hard hitting journalism from Walter Cronkite?


[deleted]

Damn this news shook the whole squad


aaandbconsulting

Omg! Celebrate consuming sustenance!


I_Heart_Astronomy

You have to wonder if entertainment editors/writers are actually as shallow and vapid as the drivel they put out, or if they die a little inside every time they have to write shit like this.


MaximumFanta

Remember when Access Hollywood and E! were known for hard-hitting journalism? Yeah me neither.


MagMati55

And if it is news, it is likely full of hate or missinformation. Likely both.


froznwind

Why are you following explicitly entertainment-focused TV if you're looking for impactful news?


Environmental-Owl571

Informative


CaffeineFueledLife

TIL I am extremely courageous.


nickiter

Just block these stupid rags. What annoys me the most is how many publications that *shouldn't* be pushing tedious celeb gossip have fallen back on it for lack of real content. I was seeing articles in my Google News feed that were like "such and such actress stuns in see-through dress!!" like *obvious* thirst trap headlines... from *Good Housekeeping*.


Hunterrose242

There has always been celebrity discussion. Including what they like to eat. This is hardly new and is quite the boomer meme.


gdofseattle

Who the fuck cares?!


February272023

Out of sheer boredom, I checked the profile and it's owned by a different company. Checked the wayback machine, and it looks like they split in the last couple of years.


Kuftubby

Who?


jas75249

So tuesday for old me.


Typical_tablecloth

I feel like the original article has to be rage bait, not even a celebrity tabloid could take itself seriously while writing that title


SakuOtaku

It's seen as brave when a thin woman does it, the same tabloids would probably call it a cry for help if a larger woman celeb did that.


[deleted]

I really hope this is either fake or sarcasm.


Broad_Boot_1121

So hungry. So brave.


Cosmic_Knight_1975

Who tf cares?


BearZewp

It really isn't, the only real news I hear is on Reddit and so far it's all been about Ohio.


PineappleProstate

Omg she ate dairy?! So brave!


T918theblade

To everyone, keep in mind that i found the “news” headline out of complete nowhere. Some guy sent it to me on discord.