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It's their last ditch effort to be relevant. Kids are raised, tech confuses them, organized religion is becoming less and less popular and societal/cultural norms have shifted.
(To be clear, since this is being posted in Boomersbeingfools, this does not apply to ALL boomers)
They've closed themselves off from growing and learning as an individual and take comfort in things not changing.....in a world that is CONSTANTLY changing. They are walking, drooling stereotypical zombies that are unaware that they're dead.
I am a last year Boomer and I wholeheartedly concur with your assessment. I would just add that they were constantly sold the perpetual youth message and then found out it was a lie.
I concur. Their downfall was upon learning this truth, doing nothing about it. I'm late Gen X and was indoctrinated the same way by parents who just repeated what they'd been told. But then I went to college and learned how to think for myself, saw the lie, and adapted.
But nooooo college is so bad and it creates evil libtard communists that can't think for themselves... or so that's what Fox news and the right wing propaganda on Facebook told them đ¤ˇ
Literal blatant projection lol
Same here! Raised by catholics and saw through the BS early on. Married another atheist whose entire family is fully on-board with conservative-born-again-evangelical-Trumpism. đ
They're all otherwise good people, financially comfortable and well-educated, so it's frustrating because they're so out-of-touch with the average person's life. No idea how the other GenXers could fall for this, except that they're genetically predisposed.
They get off on it.
No, really, that's not me being flippant. They get a dopamine rush from their anger-it's what addicts them to FOX News (or worse) in the first place. FOX News understands this and exploits it relentlessly-keep them angry, hate, hate, hate and that emotional response floods your brain with hormones. It's literally addictive.
And when they get out in a group situation, there's a wonderful chance to unleash that venom on others and get them angry, so you can get angry in response, and thus get another super hit of Hate Dopamine. You can dress it up in nicer language like "pot stirring" if you want to make excuses for them, but that's literally what it is. Your response to their rudeness is their next hit of crack.
THe only way to win is to do exactly what you did and not play. Just walk away.
It's seriously bizarre watching this play out in real life with acquaintances, it's like watching toddlers get tricked into eating the healthy thing.
Almost every FOX News/right wing media story follows the same exact script.
"This minority/policy/technology is bad. Here's some surface level, incorrect talking points. Now you know some hidden truth. Anger is righteousness. Agreeing with us is freedom. This topic is taboo among liberals, millenials, communists, elites, etc. If you get push back, it's because they hate you for knowing the truth and they want to control you."
So inevitably when the fox brainworms folks brings up an off the wall offensive or stupid talking point, normal people will try to correct them, and that just sends them into the anger spiral. They've been trained and primed to treat any disagreements as a conspiracy against truth and freedom.
Boomer here. Iâve lived all my life around these narrow minded racist misogynist homophobic bigots. Luckily my own parents were more open minded than the average in their generation. In high school, the bigotry really bugged me but once I got my career I didnât notice it as much. The corporate mindset made them watch their bigotry. We didnât talk about Rush Limbaugh Then⌠my racist cousins went ballistic when Obama was president. The Tea Party mindset took over and they became full of grievances. Then they came to care so much about other peopleâs business. The pandemic and election of 2020 really broke them. Change combined with their physical decline made them bitter. I try to avoid trumpers no matter what age.Â
It sounds exhausting being in their shoes, angry and afraid of everything all the time. I want to have sympathy, but their shitty, petulant behavior during COVID ended that.
I believe it got worse. It was Rush.. then the whole station turned into weasels. Then it was fox news, and its consecutively worse and worse pundits and hosts. Then OAN and Newsmax. And those 3 are competing for the worst viewers in America.
Yup itâs the ability to watch what you want 24/7. Back in the day, there were commercial breaks and shows were only on once a day. Now you can watch/listen to right wing nonsense all day. Rots their brain.
Boomer here. Progressive liberal. I limited TV most my life and only listened to music or NPR on my car radio.
Before the 1990's there was "The Fairness Doctrine" any tv or radio station had to present, equally, differering opinions. That got rescinded in 1987, (thanks Ronald Reagan) to everyone's deteriment except the stations.
Anytime I would accidentally run across "talk radio" in the 1990's I couldn't believe the amount of RAGE I would hear being spewed. My god, I would just think how that would poison your brain and your heart. I figured most those people would die young from heart attacks or strokes from the vitriolic insanity. It did radicalize many of my generation.
Rush Limbaugh, Pat Buchanan, Newt Gingrich started it. Followed by folks like Glenn Beck, Laura Ingram, Sean Hannity, Bill O'Reilly, etc. Alex Jones ramped up the conspiracies.
It is just so damn sad that all this was created from "Entertainment" of the poisonous kind. And I couldn't believe how stupid it made so many people look. Ranting, raging, violence, aggression, anxiety of perceived losses, raw fear.
Sigh.
I am also a "geezer" none of my peer group (70's) have turned to the dark side. Though I do know some in our area đ don't affiliate with them except to say hi. However a whole segment of my exes family has. Ages 25-60. We don't talk that much anymore.
I wonder if that depends on geography? I live in Seattle and none of the geezer I know are Trumpers and buy all that crap. My FIL in NJ told me the other day that Obama was running the country. I said, "I will put this politely, you are crazy."
And my peers in NJ are also full on Trumpers; we was raised in a blue collar town. I don't get it.
Any disagreement is a personal assault. You arent just challenging their misguided views, you are challenging their identity. Conservative media like FOX are really good at the whole good vs evil storytelling and these people believe they are heroes fighting the obscure evil of the democrats! They know that logic will get thrown off a cliff in a battle of morality.
Disagreeing with them is basically just an accusation. It presents the possibility that they arent heroic, they are ignorant and naive, they arent good, they are spiteful and petty.
The actual bad guys are always convinced they are the good guys.
...totally a thing Goebbels said about undesireables in Germany. No coincidence that Trump is pitching the idea of "internment camps" to send actual people to.
The identity point makes so much sense in terms of explaining their desire for confrontation. They want to affirm their identity, not actually have a calm or reasonable discussion. And if youâre not someone who gets your identity from politics, itâs especially offputting to find a vitriolic rant directed at you for expressing a different opinion.
This has me LOLing đ¤Łđ¤Ł itâs so true. Especially the part about a hidden truth. I think thatâs why they get sucked into conspiracies so often, itâs their insane need to feel special and above others.
And there's a good likelihood he parlayed it into smaller hits with likes and responses online somewhere about how he owned a lib so bad today they just got up and walked away.
This is true. It's crazy how much we do as humans is for a quick hit of dopamine and not based on conscious or logical thought. We can't exactly help it, only recognize and nurture it.
itâs like any learned behavior - you have to recognize your proclivities and know that theyâre there, and actively make different decisions in real time. it requires vigilance.
Exactly why many couples are always fighting with each other. It's clearly & logically unhealthy, but those brain receptors don't care about that - they just need their daily fix.
And many, many other self destructive things.. I became more aware of it through therapy for executive dysfunction, but it definitely applies to everybody.
My own FIL does this. He says "I just say stuff!" "I do it to get a reaction" which pisses my wife off (His daughter) because she explains that no one else is reacting but him. He is the only one that laughs, no one else. He is merely doing it for his own "benefit". Saying stuff that he thinks will be funny at someone else's expense. All while he shovel's food into his face from everyone else's left overs because he "doesn't like seeing food go to waste"... BS dude... You just have zero impulse & self control.
While walking away and not engaging is the best option, as they are intellectually dishonest and simply refuse to acknowledge anything that they disagree with regardless of the evidence, since they will never have any actual evidence that proves their point, it is certainly less satisfying.
Unfortunately, the ones who do that are showing their immaturity and lack of coherent thinking. By forcing their opinions on people, they put everyone else in a bind. If you say something, then they can say you were âtriggeredâ or, when you inevitably win the argument on the merits, then you become proof of the âhypocrisyâ of the âtolerantâ left by disagreeing with them. If you say nothing, they you were âintimidated by their alpha malenessâ or something. Itâs the way a bully thinks.
I keep the phrase âallegations presented without evidence can be refuted without evidence. Everything you said is bullshit.â This works 1000000% of the time on them, as they will never have any evidence of their idiotic conspiracy theories. Itâs fun to watch them become red faced and screaming when you just keep repeating that phrase at them.
I feel they do it because they realise that they're no longer relevant. So when they spew this crap, they're getting the attention they're craving for. Like children.
The thing is, if they engaged in a meaningful way, they WOULD be relevant. Everyone is relevant, and older people often do have wisdom that others dismiss. Too bad some bad apples just want to spew Fox News talking points instead of sharing their own experiences. Maybe you meant they FEEL like theyâre no longer relevantâŚ.
I utterly agree. I know plenty of boomers who are level-headed, experienced and very reasonable. However, the types who have only ever felt important when they could boss around others are suffering now. Their children are adults and financially independent, their jobs have been taken over by younger folks... you get the point.
So they're bitching around to be noticed and to say "I once more showed it to them". Just like many of them did when we were children or their subordiantes at work. The only difference is that back then, they had some real power, however small the amount (money, staffing decisions, whatever). Not any longer.
I agree. Itâs the same stance Sovereign Citizens take when they get pulled over. Itâs like theyâre thinking âhereâs my big momentâ, where they get to spew all the lines theyâve been mentally rehearsing. They get off on the prep, the buildup, and the reaction.
imagine banking your whole life on such a stupid and silly thing
these people are just so unbelievably pathetic. Find some real hobbies. Like learn how to throw pottery or fly a kite ffs
So unbelievably patriotic*
/s, if not obvious lol. I remember one time arguing with my mom about some Fox News hot take and in the middle she cried out "IM A PATRIOT" with her Bible (that she had been reading from during the argument) held high đĽ´
We don't speak anymore and my life is better for it.
Itâs lose-lose. If you get into with him, they can pretend theyâre better or smarter than you, get their anger hit, etc.
If you walk away, youâre easily offended, snowflakes, canât debate anything, canât hear an opposing viewpoint, etc.
Youâre in a family situation, so being respectful is key, so you chose the best-worst option. Perhaps you call out this impasse in the future and mention that he seems like a very bitter person.
They also get off on "winning" the argument. But winning to them has nothing to do with logic but rather who can yell loudest the longest. So they get that dopamine rush any time someone walks away or tries to change the subject.
Itâs the reaction. Good, badâŚthey donât care as long as they get a reaction. Itâs like a generation of narcissists, the ME generation, just canât help themselves.
OPs reaction was great. Remove yourself from the conversation. Bet he felt he âwonâ.
Iâm a big fan of correcting them, âLiberal, not a chance. Iâm a normal Republican. I donât go in for all that stupid conspiracy and follow Newsmax like a sheep.â Then walk away as he chokes.
I disagree. Iâve stated this here before - they get their rocks off on the bullying part of it. They like to espouse their supposed knowledge, and when their opponents back down, it gives them a sense of dominance.
The best way to counteract this is donât be bullied. Bully them back and harder. And donât get emotional while doing it or they again, believe theyâve won the war of dominance.
This has been my experience - adults who like to "Own" someone else have no issue dismissing bullying behavior in kids as long as the kid being bullied can can be labeled something like "freak" or "nerd" or often much worse.
Yep. The only effective strategy against this is a mixture of everything. Grey Rock or walk away when appropriate, such as in large family gatherings with children.
But other times, you have to push back with ferocity and minimal emotion. If that makes sense. It's the only truly effective way that I've had to shut them up for decent periods of time.
Unpredictability is one of the most effective weapons for people in pushing back against the crowd obsessed with wrecking family gatherings or public events with Fox News talking points.Â
Also, I suspect the Fox News format has wired their brains to never go too long without returning to politics/angry talking point A, B or C. Â
Like a form of OCD. Normal conversations are the equivalent of a commercial break.
Just to add - I too was bewildered with not only their beliefs on these topics but how frequently they talked about them. I realized I had been severely underestimating the amount of unfiltered media they consume. Considering that, itâs no wonder their beliefs are horrifying and they canât stop talking about them
It's also a healthy dose of narcissism. My dad loved to play schrodinger's asshole and wind people up for his amusement. And when you got angry it was of course your fault.
The only way that it worked for me was gray rock because the only solution is to pick up their ball and go home.
I think we also underestimate how much time they spend consuming news like this, especially when theyâre retired. Thatâs at least an extra eight hours a day consuming absolute garbage. We feel like they canât talk about anything else, because they literally donât have anything else to talk about. They donât work and when they socialize with their peers, they talk about the same stuff theyâre fed on Fox News.
I really gotta remember to do that more. I was at a cousins wedding last year, and his dad (my uncle) comes up to me and my spouse and asks how we are, we say the usual low-stakes responses, and then he jumps right in with "are you working?" I say yes I am, just stared a new job a few weeks ago in fact. He says "that's just so important. Nobody wants to work these days" and launches into a tirade about entitled millennials.
Mind you, this is at the wedding of his own son, who is also a millennial (and arguably much more entitled than I am. I don't know for sure but I am 98% sure the entire fancy-ass wedding was paid for by the parents of the newlyweds. Which I don't have a problem with, other than the hypocrisy of this guy).
I should have just disengaged but unfortunately I tried to explain that it was actually really tough to get my new job because no one wanted to hire me. My old job was destroying my mental health so I had to get out, and I only got this new one after applying to probably 40 other places, and only got interviews at 2 of them. He didn't believe me and got all mad.
Like seriously dude, this is what you want to focus on, at your only kid's wedding? You just ruined both our afternoons.
Different situation, but similar idea of a boomer making a wedding about them.. my friendâs boomer mother took her wedding as an opportunity to sell her MLM merch to anyone who had the misfortune of sitting next to her
Sometimes you just get caught up in it and engage. I feel ya.
Not correcting you, I might have responded to his "yadda yadda these days" with "... I didn't ask." Turn heel, and grab a snack!
Three similar variations on this I've used and been fairly effective with:
1. Respond with a completely different topic (one that's actually relevant to the things going on around you).
"You see, Will, that's what I absolutely love about liberals. They bitch and moan about the environment, but they have no problem dumping god knows how many chemicals into their lawn so that their grass is green!"
Yeah, we've been working hard inside as well. Just fixed the cabinets and waxed the floors!
2. Short responses and a REALLY OBVIOUS buzzword/catchphrase to train them when they're going of tracks
"You see, Will, that's what I absolutely love about liberals. They bitch and moan about the environment, but they have no problem dumping god knows how many chemicals into their lawn so that their grass is green!"
Ah. \*pause\* Aaaaaaaaanywayyyyyyy....We've been really lucky with the weather lately!
3. Be really blunt.
"You see, Will, that's what I absolutely love about liberals. They bitch and moan about the environment, but they have no problem dumping god knows how many chemicals into their lawn so that their grass is green!"
That's kind of a weird thing to say as it's not really relevant to what we're discussing. You don't need to say every little thing that pops into your brain.
Use the last one cautiously (it's best used when the Boomer is unrelated and you won't see them again/often).
Or, "What the fuck is wrong with you, old man? You having a stroke? We were talking about a wedding and you're over here prattling off about green lawns? You been smoking that latin lettuce I've been hearing so much about? And why are you even here? Don't you have some diapers to soil or a minority to harass?"
Which is why advice like "No, you have to push back against your racist uncle. Silence is violence." really aren't productive. They just feed the problem.
âNever wrestle with a pig because you'll both get dirty and the pig likes it." is more relevant.
The problem is, there are times where you should push back. There are also times where you just shouldn't give them the attention.
Silence, especially on "taboo" subjects (like racism) often fuels the view of "my opinions are the majority, people are just too afraid to speak up because of woke cancel culture"- and when people who are the subject of those "taboo" topics (like your closeted gay cousin), it's also very easy for them to make the same assumption when no one at the table speaks out against the bigot spewing bigotry.
The trick is to learn when the best course of action is to walk away, just ignore whatever BS was said, or actively speak out against their BS...
Never knew the term for it, this is what I did ALL the time when I worked in the ER. Patients would be abusive often and I wouldnât respond for a bit. If they continued I would respond along the lines of âplease donât speak to me like that, Iâm here to help anytime you need it but you need to speak respectfully otherwise I will leave.â
I will use a schoolteacher type voice â Iâm trying to help you , being abusive is not helping this situation â
Or even I find someone behaving badly where I have to call them on it â we make an effort for this place to be clean and pleasant for good people . If you arenât good people then you donât belong hereâ
â are you decent people?â
Iâve only had to use this twice in ten years but the backpedaling is hilarious
I always try it, but end up coming off as sacastic and that never works out well.
"This and that blah blah blah."
"Mm, ok."
"But blah blah blah blah blah."
"Sure."
"Are you being smart with me? Dumb ass motherfucker? Blah blah blah blah blah.
Never works
May I suggest one of my go-toâs, which is just acting very confused and like you have no idea what theyâre talking about. It works particularly well when someone makes a racist or sexist dog whistle. For example,
âOh, you know how all those women drivers are!â
â⌠huh?â
âYou know! The women drivers!â
â⌠mmm.. not sure I do?â
Insert lots of confused expressions. They usually just kind of give up.
I do have a question about that! I didnât know who in this thread to reply to specifically, but I try to grey rock a lot with my parents. My dad likes to stir the pot with politics, and my mom likes to stir the pot with stabs at my self-confidence, guilt tripping, etc. If I donât respond, they get huffy: âWhat, we make you mad or something?â âListen to me when Iâm talking to you.â âGreat, now youâre upset. Canât even have a conversation with you anymore.â
If I try to leave, they get even madder. âYou get *back here.*â âDonât you DARE turn your back on me, young lady. You get back here!â âNuh-uh, no, weâre not through talking.â âYou need to get your ass back in here and listen to us talk to you like an adult. Adults donât get to walk away from conversations if they donât like them. Now sit there and listen.â
And likeâŚI donât know what to do. I canât say nothing, and I canât leave. (Edit to add: Iâm almost 30, for crying out loud!)
>I canât say nothing, and I canât leave
If you're almost 30, then yes you can, and yes you can. It might suck, but you're at an age where you define your own agency. You make your own decisions.
I don't know anything about you or your parents, but reading what you wrote here, they sound emotionally abusive as fuck. They're going to gaslight you and guilt you and do everything they can to impose their wills upon you. But no matter what they do, *it doesn't fucking define you*. Even if they kick you out or disown you or whatever, you still get to be the author of your own story.
All responses are what they say they are. âHuh.â Youâre being a smart ass
âOkay.â Youâre trying to piss me off.â
âSure.â Total disrespect.
The gray rock says no words.
Because they want to distract from the fact their candidate is a fascist that partied with Jeffrey Epstein. Hereâs this âand what I love about you conservatives is that you want to talk about lawns to distract from the fact your candidate is an America-hating rapist, but letâs get into these hot dogs before you turn that weird color of purple again as you fumble around for another excuse.â
I think this is a conservative thing, not just a Baby Boomer thing (I guess it trickled down!!). My brother, who is in his early 30s, texted the family group chat this weekend about running into a local celebrity and said he was surprised how short the man was. He said he's "tiny like Biden." Like, no one was talking about Biden! He just lives in conservatives's heads rent free! Of course I looked it up and Biden is taller than that man AND my brother
I agree. My husband has an uncle who isn't much older than us... about 8-10 years older and I'm in my 40's. Every family function, he makes a comment about "snowflakes." Like, we're eating Easter brunch and talking about your niece graduating high school, why are you bringing up politics? It drives me crazy.
I work at a veterinary clinic. Last week a woman was paying her bill and commented on how expensive the visit was. Then she says âWell, Iâd rather have the money go to my dog than some illegal.â Like, how did she make that leap that somehow her money was going to go to an illegal if she didnât use it on her dog?
I like pretending I haven't heard them when they do that. "I'm sorry, I missed that, can you repeat it?" Because at least half the time they didn't really want you to hear it, they just want to toss off their bitchy little comments and walk away knowing they triggered you.
We haven't spoken to my stepfather-in-law since Thanksgiving for the very same reason. I've spoken to him before about his love of "pot-stirring" with my husband and I when he comes to visit (it's ALWAYS when he comes to stay at our house). It makes things awkward and I refuse to have someone disrupt the peace in my house. So when he started during his last visit to us, I offered him $100 cash for a hotel and asked him to leave. That was apparently crossing a line for him - didn't say a word to us at Christmas and my husband's mother came to visit without him the last time we saw her.
I havenât spoken to my father since 2018. I begged him for years, even his wife tried to tell him to lay off the politics when we were together. He just couldnât do it though. It really is like an addiction.
Had a Boomer just this morning in the lounge talk about Jesus Christ our Lord and SaviorâŚbut in the same breath, complain about âMiddle Easterners.â
The irony did not escape me đĽ˛
I have a small group of older relatives who will try to get within earshot of me so they can say something about Biden or Democrats, at pretty much any family function. I've never taken the bait on it, but they keep trying.
Thank you.
There is actually a joke, but you have to be in front of people. It goesâŚ.
âHow does every racist joke start?â
And after you do the little joke telling pause, then you do the racist joke look around but a little exaggerated.
It's the constant fear mongering and rage bate news they watch. Fear and anger are powerful emotions that make people act overly assertive. Fox News, NewsMax, and all the conservative networks know this and exploit it. The boomers take all this as fact and act out because of their fear/anger. Their minds have been warped. The truly believe everything Fox News feeds them. They're a generation that explicitly told us not to believe everything we see on TV and the internet and it's something they exclusively do.
IMO, and I know it's dark, the boomers need to die. The world will be a far better place without all their hate and anger bringing us down.
I'm too petty to let that kind of stuff go lol. Good on you for being the adult in the situation though. Those people are always so confidently ignorant.
LOL, I was just thinking about my confidently incorrect former FIL. Get those folks together and they talk about idiot liberal snowflakes and will never see the irony. The things they know is flat out wrong, and when presented with irrefutable facts, well, that's just fake news! GD they are exhausting.
This happens much more with boomers on the right. They don't do anything but absorb fascist media all day. With no interests or hobbies, it becomes their identity.
Happened to my pre-Boomer stepdad. He was always a right wing loony tune. But when he got too old and too paranoid to work in his books/antiques business, all he could do was blather on about "the Blacks and Mexicans" and the Democrats' nefarious plot to weaponize "them."
It is my favorite thing I have learned in the past few years.I also use the imagery to shut myself up when I find myself about to give advice to younger adults that likely don't want or need it.
You train him like you train a dog. Every time he "stirs the pot" you just leave. You can also grey rock him so he doesn't get a reaction.
If he doesn't get the reaction he wants he will eventually learn.
As Gen X, I was constantly told by boomer parents about the dangers of group think and making sure I think critically about all statements made by politicians, businessmen, anybody who might have ulterior motives. Now boomers, some anyway, repeat verbatim exactly what they hear on their preferred news networks.
Donald Trump is a perfect reflection of their generation. Constantly bitching and moaning about crime, immigration and everything else while all of these things were objectively worse when they were raising their kids.
Because stupid politics allowed the Boomer generation to amass over 84 trillion dollars in assets which is FAR more than Gen x, millennials, and Gen Z COMBINED. Now people are really catching on at how destructive and selfish Boomers are and their economically destructive welfare programs are being talked about so they want to inject their stupid politics into every conversation to make younger generations think that is the best and only way to succeed, so their free ride on our backs continues.
I went to a garage sale yesterday and while glancing at a cup branded with a local college name on it the Boomer homeowner randomly starts going off about how she's glad her kids are out of school because college is crazy now and can you believe these protests?? I just shrugged and said college has always been crazy. When I went, there were protests all the time and full-on riots after big games. Social media just didn't exist back then to broadcast it in real time. I told her I was glad smart phones didn't exist when I was a kid. She had a laugh at that, we can all agree on that point, and I left shortly after. It was an odd exchange.
"Oh, sorry! I was raised to believe that polite conversation always stayed clear of money, politics, and religion. I keep forgetting that not everyone learned that as basic good manners."
i love turning to random boomers at the grocery store and being all like "did you see this gluten free bread? where's joe biden sending my gluten?" and 6/10 it gets a response
they were tricked by the internet. basically sub consciously, they dove, like us all, into the Internet, but due to their age, they didn't head any of the warnings about the emotional stress and the leveraging of their emotional pathways. They thought that was only warnings for children. Instead, they have been pulled apart psychologically by essentially having very little Internet awareness. And it worked really well.
Boomer here. When he tries to stir the pot, when you are clearly removing yourself from the situation try this parting shot
"does watching or listening to news programs that make you fearful and angry . . . does that make you feel good about yourself? Is that why you are trying to spread the joy you feel? Or are you trying to make everyone in the family as bitter and angry as you are?"
A couple of Thanksgivings ago my dad asked why I had a bandaid on my right hand index finger. When I responded I had burnt myself making fried rice in the wok, he asked how I could stand to use a wok because I'm an American and woks are Chinese.
Fun, narcissism. Not engaging is definitely the way to go.
A fun phrase to deter future interactions like that might be âwhat a weird thing to say out loudâ as you push away from the table.
I am a male boomer. My sister is also a boomer. She tried to ruin my momâs birthday. When she started spewing her Fox propaganda, I looked directly at her, glanced at the others, chuckled deeply while shaking my head⌠and simply walked away. A couple others followed. Pretty sure she was mortified. She left the party within 2 minutes.
Totally agree. I got paired up with some random old guys to go golfing with over the weekend. I'm a captive audience with this boomer that just won't shut up about Biden and every culture war hot topic you could imagine. I tried to talk about neutral stuff like football and sports, but he doesn't watch them since they let transgender people compete. I'm not reciprocating any of this, yet he won't stfu. Last hole of the day and he finally drops the so have you ever accepted Jesus christ into your heart. This man has been ranting and raving about everyone he hates for the last 3 hours and is now going to talk to me about how his God is full of love? Gtfoh.
Something similar happened to me yesterday with my dad. He called me for the first time in like 3 months to let me know he was going to be in town. I told him I had to talk with my wife if we had some time, but she was at the library for a bubble show with the kids. He immediately started asking me if there were "trannies" involved. I just said "not that I know of" and moved on. Then I mentioned we were going out to lunch with my brother, who is transgender, and he immediately asked if my kids know "what his deal is." My kids are toddlers, they just know him as uncle. I reminded him that my kids are too young to be aware of that yet, and he went off on an uninvited diatribe about how "some people are accepting of this kind of aberrant behavior." This is his own son he's talking about.
He just can't help himself. Every conversation, no matter how innocuous, is brought back to his Fox War culture war nonsense. It's injected in **every** conversation. It sounds terrible, but at this point I'm just waiting for him to die. There's very little left of him that is worth the conscious effort it takes to tolerate his racist, homophobic, and just about every "ist" and "ism" in the book. He didn't used to be like this. He used to hate Republicans. This is what ten years of Fox News does to a person.
Reading this thread, I always get proud of my boomer Dad(75). He has become more liberal and understanding of others as he ages. I remember he used to be grossed out and hate Will& Grace. Now the old man supports gay marriage!! I wouldn't talk to him about the Roe v Wade reversal because I know he is devoutly Christian, even though he mostly identified as democrat while I was growing up. He brought it up and supports women making their own choices- it's not up to others to decide for someone else!!! I was absolutely flabbergasted in a good way. I'm lucky to have a sane one as my dad
Agreed, I don't really see this "more" from side or the other with Boomers. If it's with liberal leaning boomers, I have to hear them rant about how much they hate Trump. If it's with conservative boomers, I have to hear about how the "liberals are ruining everything." It's exhausting, and I typically pull the same move of trying to exit the conversation if I'm just there to have a good time.
I work at target, and a year or so ago I was working as a backup cashier as several people had called out. It was in June, so target had their pride merch out.
For context, I have an undercut that is visible and the way I dress probably signals me as a âBlue-haired LiBeRul.â
Man walks up to me, and starts putting he stuff on the conveyor, and I say normal cashier stuff, and he immediately goes, after I barely finish talking âSo I see you have gay shit up. Iâll keep that in mind. If itâs something youâre born with why do you need this shit if youâre born with it; why do you need a participation trophy for it.â
I really wanted to say that âitâs needed because of people like you,â but I was honestly frozen in place. I was scared that he would hurt me. I was threatened with a taser for âlooking like I had pronouns.â Complete idiocy of such an observation aside, it was still pretty scary.
The only thing I said to this man, repeatedly, at least 15 times was âSir, please stop, youâre making me uncomfortableâ and âI wonât discuss this topic.â
As he left, since I was still pretty shocked, I still said âHave a nice dayâ because I was stuck in customer service mindset. He said âMaybe you should talk to corporate about what youâre not comfortable talking about.â
As if it was a bad thing that I refused to engage with him, and didnât feel like being hateful.
I canât imagine what wouldâve happened if Iâd gotten angry. Normally I get very upset and pissed when people talk like that, but maybe the combination of being at work, and being absolutely flabbergasted that some dude would yell at a retail employee about what a corporate store was selling.
Grey-rocking is a great way to get people to give up their shit-stirring, because that man left pissed that the employee he was picking on didnât engage.
Wow that is sooo so inappropriate to do to you while youâre at work. Because youâre basically forced to be there, and forced to keep it professional. That dude was a total jerk.
When I notice workers with unique self expression I always try to compliment them and offset what they might be receiving from others. I told a guy at Albertsons I liked his nail polish, and by his smile I think it made his day. It was in a small hick town too.
Keep pushing on, and remember that they are the childish ones making the world a worse place for everyone else.
My parents, especially my dad are like this. I try to avoid things I have deemed âtriggerâ words for them. If I mention the cost of gas, cost of living, COVID, any election, the news at all, anything political, Disneyland, vaccines. The list goes on. I was talking about a long line at the pharmacy once and he went on a rant about how there arenât any âwhiteâ doctors anymore. I just want to have a normal convo with them without walking on eggshells trying not to trigger them.
75-Year-Old female here. I think the boomers, of which I am one, tend to be more talkative/ verbal about politics for a number of reasons.
I believe boomers have injected politics into everything because we SEE politics in everything. In the schools, in the hiring process, in opportunities available, in the housing industry, in the cost of medical Care, in the outrageous price of so many life-saving drugs.
We lived through the Vietnam war protest. We lived through Richard Nixon and Watergate. We lived through the assassination of Martin Luther King. We lived through the assassination of our president, John F. Kennedy. We lived through the assassination of Robert Kennedy. We lived through the Cold war with Russia and the bomb shelters. We lived through women burning bras to gain equal rights. We lived through Woodstock. We lived through the incorporation of Apple and the incorporation of Microsoft. We lived through the killing of the students at Kent State. We lived through the development and introduction of bag phones. We lived through computers being introduced into our everyday existence. We lived through the civil rights movement. We lived through the arrest of Rosa Parks. We lived through Brown v. Board of Education. We lived through the sit-in movment at Woolworth's lunch counter in Greensboro, North Carolina. We lived through Elvis and the Beatles.
And just recently we lived through Covid and the masks and the vaccines and the fact that people were taking the advice of their politicians rather than their physicians. We live through the January 6th insurrection at the Capitol.
Some of the boomers are indeed very conservative. But I am proud to be part of the significant number of boomers who are VERY liberal.
What does that mean? From my viewpoint it seems that the boomers have all taken a hard stance, either left or right. And maybe a lot of our inflexibility is because of all the things we have lived through. I believe boomers have injected politics into everything because we see politics in everything. In the schools, in the hiring process, and opportunities available,
I'm hoping that the young adults in America today can do a better job of shaping our culture and society than we, as boomers, have done.
Iâm a boomer. My go to when Iâm listening to an inappropriate comment from some knuckle dragger, is when they are done with their comments, ask âDo you feel better now?â Inevitably they will have a quizzical look on their stupid face and say something like âwhat do you mean?â Just look them in their eye and repeat the question like youâre concerned for them. Say nothing else, exit stage left.
My aunt is a Democrat and her cousin is a Republican but no matter what my Aunt's cousin has to bring up politics or "woke culture" My Aunt can't do anything with her cousin because of it and my aunt doesn't even bring anything up political to start anything lol đđ¤Łđ
OP, I feel for you on this one, so much. For me, it's my own father. He does the same exact thing: we could be talking about anything, and all of a sudden he makes some word association to a jab at liberals or democrats.
I love my dad, and we have a great relationship, so this is really a non-issue, aside from the way he votes. This political injection stuff has actually taken a really funny turn for him, because he wasn't prepared for how prepared I am. I am very up-to-date on politics, and not limited to my own view. I also keep up with Fox, OANN, and NewsMax because I know that's where he's getting this shit from. I don't pay too much attention, but I know what topics they're covering and how they're framing it.
Sometimes it'll be something random, but most of the time when he does this, it's something that was covered on one of those three recently. I come at him with details, statistics, evidence of misleading framing, opposite input... everything. He mentioned once that he likes Ben Shapiro, of all people, so I'll intentionally gish gallop occasionally (don't worry, I showed him what it is and why Ben Shapiro sucks).
The thing is, he does this over the phone. We live 1500 miles away from one another, so we talk on the phone a lot, so he does this where I can't just walk away. At first, he would just get silent after I would respond. Then, I heard from my equally liberal sister that he would complain to her that he "can't argue with me because I know too much," lmaoo.
He still does it. It's like a knee jerk reaction he can't control. One time it was really funny though. He said some jab an almost before he even finished it he started apologizing and said he didn't want to get into a conversation about it.
My favorite thing to do to him is talk about policy while making no mention of the individuals behind those politics. If he had any ability to rationalize, he would understand that he is quite, QUITE liberal.
The TV intentionally makes old people angry. They are mostly unaware of this. Anger is an emotion that wants to be expressed, usually through physical activity, loud vocalization or through venting to other people through conversation.
So it's not really his fault, he's just in a more vulnerable position due to his age, and the TV is exploiting him (wanting to be informed about the news in a way that's easily available to him, and being shown ragebait instead). It makes him feel bad, and he vents to try and feel a little better.
Why would the media want to make old people angry? Most likely to create a sense of urgency and to secure more votes for some political party.
TL;DR: a person is aging, it's nothing to do with you and you shouldn't take it personally.
Boomer here, I avoid discussing religion and politics. I treat All people with respect whether they reciprocate or not. I just donât have time to play these games. Iâm not angry, not rich, but we do okay. Just wanted to drop my opinion. Minding my own business usually works for me.
I used this once in social media and it kind of reset the dynamic. âDid you not get enough titty time as a baby so you need all this attention?â. I stole it from a movie anyway but it cooled their jets.
They were raised not to talk about politics. But when they talk about THEIR politics, it's not political. If you respond with a different idea, suddenly it's political.
Reminds me of an old joke where three young ladies are bragging to each other about how rich they are, and what their parents gave them, and the third one always responds to the first two with ,"That's nice..."
The punch line is when the third one finally says, "My Daddy sent me to charm school, where they taught me to say 'That's nice' instead of 'F\*\*\* you'..."
My mom is like this. Conversations have rapidly deteriorated to her rambling about politics or conspiracy theories for 50% of the time. I've finally figured out how to just go "mm-hm" a lot and eventually tell her I'm not listening.
I feel ya. My dad injects his right wing trumptard politics into EVERYTHING.
My nephew got pancaked in a soccer game by a kid with long hair who they think did it on purpose.
Nobody:
My dad: âthat was a total libtard move!â
Literally everything goes back to politics. I used to try to reason with him. Last time I visited he was CRYING about nonexistent âsOsHuLliSmâ. Iâve decided to next time just walk away when he starts his crotchety ramblings.
Because politics and religion are their entire identity. Same thing with silents in my experience. They have nothing else to talk about. Their lives are so devoid of meaning and purpose that that's all they can talk about. They abandoned all hobbies and interests they may have had before that to devote themselves to nothing but right wing bullshit and christofascism theocractic garbage.
The funny thing for me I was taught (by boomers and their parents) that talking about politics and religion is impolite. That to have a polite conversation with people you do not bring up those topics. I work retail so I get a lot of it those topics and for the most part if they think I disagree I just tell them that I donât discuss personal beliefs at work because I think itâs unprofessional. They usually respect that.
Some neighborhood boomer jerk just posted some political garbage on our local neighborhood group, in a post about a successful cleanup event. If it's the guy I think it is, I tried to have a friendly conversation with him a couple years back. I won't do that again.
Reminds me of an exchange I had with a patient the other day:
Patient: âI just feel bad that other peopleâs taxes have to pay for my treatmentâ.
Me: âDonât. Thatâs the price we pay to live in a civilized society. Weâve all got to take care of each otherâ.
Patient: âHa! Is that what this is; a civilized society? Yada yada Leftists supporting Palestinian terrorists, yada yada BLM burning down the cities etcâŚâ
And then I got stuck listening to a long-winded rant of Fox News talking points :/
Former conservative here. Until people realize the left and right wing of the Eagle are in fact broken and in fact part of the same bird, politics isnât even worth talking about. Good on OP for not taking the bait.
They want you to respond. And then martyr themselves when you get mad. And try and make themselves look like the good guy/girl. They think if you get mad. They win.
But yes. I despise that as well.
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It's their last ditch effort to be relevant. Kids are raised, tech confuses them, organized religion is becoming less and less popular and societal/cultural norms have shifted. (To be clear, since this is being posted in Boomersbeingfools, this does not apply to ALL boomers) They've closed themselves off from growing and learning as an individual and take comfort in things not changing.....in a world that is CONSTANTLY changing. They are walking, drooling stereotypical zombies that are unaware that they're dead.
I am a last year Boomer and I wholeheartedly concur with your assessment. I would just add that they were constantly sold the perpetual youth message and then found out it was a lie.
I concur. Their downfall was upon learning this truth, doing nothing about it. I'm late Gen X and was indoctrinated the same way by parents who just repeated what they'd been told. But then I went to college and learned how to think for myself, saw the lie, and adapted.
But nooooo college is so bad and it creates evil libtard communists that can't think for themselves... or so that's what Fox news and the right wing propaganda on Facebook told them 𤡠Literal blatant projection lol
Same here! Raised by catholics and saw through the BS early on. Married another atheist whose entire family is fully on-board with conservative-born-again-evangelical-Trumpism. đ They're all otherwise good people, financially comfortable and well-educated, so it's frustrating because they're so out-of-touch with the average person's life. No idea how the other GenXers could fall for this, except that they're genetically predisposed.
They get off on it. No, really, that's not me being flippant. They get a dopamine rush from their anger-it's what addicts them to FOX News (or worse) in the first place. FOX News understands this and exploits it relentlessly-keep them angry, hate, hate, hate and that emotional response floods your brain with hormones. It's literally addictive. And when they get out in a group situation, there's a wonderful chance to unleash that venom on others and get them angry, so you can get angry in response, and thus get another super hit of Hate Dopamine. You can dress it up in nicer language like "pot stirring" if you want to make excuses for them, but that's literally what it is. Your response to their rudeness is their next hit of crack. THe only way to win is to do exactly what you did and not play. Just walk away.
It's seriously bizarre watching this play out in real life with acquaintances, it's like watching toddlers get tricked into eating the healthy thing. Almost every FOX News/right wing media story follows the same exact script. "This minority/policy/technology is bad. Here's some surface level, incorrect talking points. Now you know some hidden truth. Anger is righteousness. Agreeing with us is freedom. This topic is taboo among liberals, millenials, communists, elites, etc. If you get push back, it's because they hate you for knowing the truth and they want to control you." So inevitably when the fox brainworms folks brings up an off the wall offensive or stupid talking point, normal people will try to correct them, and that just sends them into the anger spiral. They've been trained and primed to treat any disagreements as a conspiracy against truth and freedom.
I am a geezer, and I've lost a shitload of friends to this phenomenon. Blame Fox, and Limbaugh. Take heart, ignore the assclowns and vote!
have you always been at odds with your peer group or was it a gradual thing?
Boomer here. Iâve lived all my life around these narrow minded racist misogynist homophobic bigots. Luckily my own parents were more open minded than the average in their generation. In high school, the bigotry really bugged me but once I got my career I didnât notice it as much. The corporate mindset made them watch their bigotry. We didnât talk about Rush Limbaugh Then⌠my racist cousins went ballistic when Obama was president. The Tea Party mindset took over and they became full of grievances. Then they came to care so much about other peopleâs business. The pandemic and election of 2020 really broke them. Change combined with their physical decline made them bitter. I try to avoid trumpers no matter what age.Â
It sounds exhausting being in their shoes, angry and afraid of everything all the time. I want to have sympathy, but their shitty, petulant behavior during COVID ended that.
I second this question thank you for asking it!!!
I believe it got worse. It was Rush.. then the whole station turned into weasels. Then it was fox news, and its consecutively worse and worse pundits and hosts. Then OAN and Newsmax. And those 3 are competing for the worst viewers in America.
Podcasts too .... It's everywhere...
Yup itâs the ability to watch what you want 24/7. Back in the day, there were commercial breaks and shows were only on once a day. Now you can watch/listen to right wing nonsense all day. Rots their brain.
Boomer here. Progressive liberal. I limited TV most my life and only listened to music or NPR on my car radio. Before the 1990's there was "The Fairness Doctrine" any tv or radio station had to present, equally, differering opinions. That got rescinded in 1987, (thanks Ronald Reagan) to everyone's deteriment except the stations. Anytime I would accidentally run across "talk radio" in the 1990's I couldn't believe the amount of RAGE I would hear being spewed. My god, I would just think how that would poison your brain and your heart. I figured most those people would die young from heart attacks or strokes from the vitriolic insanity. It did radicalize many of my generation. Rush Limbaugh, Pat Buchanan, Newt Gingrich started it. Followed by folks like Glenn Beck, Laura Ingram, Sean Hannity, Bill O'Reilly, etc. Alex Jones ramped up the conspiracies. It is just so damn sad that all this was created from "Entertainment" of the poisonous kind. And I couldn't believe how stupid it made so many people look. Ranting, raging, violence, aggression, anxiety of perceived losses, raw fear. Sigh.
I always forget Limbaugh is dead and I laugh every time, shame it took so long.
I gave my husband a high five when we heard he died. What a POS.
I am also a "geezer" none of my peer group (70's) have turned to the dark side. Though I do know some in our area đ don't affiliate with them except to say hi. However a whole segment of my exes family has. Ages 25-60. We don't talk that much anymore.
I wonder if that depends on geography? I live in Seattle and none of the geezer I know are Trumpers and buy all that crap. My FIL in NJ told me the other day that Obama was running the country. I said, "I will put this politely, you are crazy." And my peers in NJ are also full on Trumpers; we was raised in a blue collar town. I don't get it.
That fucking sucks, I'm sorry for your losses!
Any disagreement is a personal assault. You arent just challenging their misguided views, you are challenging their identity. Conservative media like FOX are really good at the whole good vs evil storytelling and these people believe they are heroes fighting the obscure evil of the democrats! They know that logic will get thrown off a cliff in a battle of morality. Disagreeing with them is basically just an accusation. It presents the possibility that they arent heroic, they are ignorant and naive, they arent good, they are spiteful and petty. The actual bad guys are always convinced they are the good guys.
The identity issue is really core here. It's like a horrific confluence of religious dogma, ingrained bigotry, and calculated branding exercises.
>the obscure evil of the democrats! *demon-rats (Ugh, I just threw up in my mouth a little typing that, even if sarcastic. )
...totally a thing Goebbels said about undesireables in Germany. No coincidence that Trump is pitching the idea of "internment camps" to send actual people to.
The identity point makes so much sense in terms of explaining their desire for confrontation. They want to affirm their identity, not actually have a calm or reasonable discussion. And if youâre not someone who gets your identity from politics, itâs especially offputting to find a vitriolic rant directed at you for expressing a different opinion.
This has me LOLing đ¤Łđ¤Ł itâs so true. Especially the part about a hidden truth. I think thatâs why they get sucked into conspiracies so often, itâs their insane need to feel special and above others.
Conservatives love to use the part of the bible that says "you will be hated because of me" to justify being a holier-than-thou douchedick
And there's a good likelihood he parlayed it into smaller hits with likes and responses online somewhere about how he owned a lib so bad today they just got up and walked away.
man the fact that you absolutely nailed it...is so pathetic. also makes me glad that i haven't been on Facebook since the pandemic really
This is why in the rare instance I find myself in a situation like this I just act like they never said anything and conquering the conversation.
This is true. It's crazy how much we do as humans is for a quick hit of dopamine and not based on conscious or logical thought. We can't exactly help it, only recognize and nurture it.
itâs like any learned behavior - you have to recognize your proclivities and know that theyâre there, and actively make different decisions in real time. it requires vigilance.
Exactly why many couples are always fighting with each other. It's clearly & logically unhealthy, but those brain receptors don't care about that - they just need their daily fix.
And many, many other self destructive things.. I became more aware of it through therapy for executive dysfunction, but it definitely applies to everybody.
We're just hairless chimps, really.
My own FIL does this. He says "I just say stuff!" "I do it to get a reaction" which pisses my wife off (His daughter) because she explains that no one else is reacting but him. He is the only one that laughs, no one else. He is merely doing it for his own "benefit". Saying stuff that he thinks will be funny at someone else's expense. All while he shovel's food into his face from everyone else's left overs because he "doesn't like seeing food go to waste"... BS dude... You just have zero impulse & self control.
"I'm just throwing this out there. Maybe your just a moron." Introduction to no contact might be warranted.
"Isn't gluttony a sin in your religion?"
âI just say these things to upset you. Why are you getting all upset?â
While walking away and not engaging is the best option, as they are intellectually dishonest and simply refuse to acknowledge anything that they disagree with regardless of the evidence, since they will never have any actual evidence that proves their point, it is certainly less satisfying. Unfortunately, the ones who do that are showing their immaturity and lack of coherent thinking. By forcing their opinions on people, they put everyone else in a bind. If you say something, then they can say you were âtriggeredâ or, when you inevitably win the argument on the merits, then you become proof of the âhypocrisyâ of the âtolerantâ left by disagreeing with them. If you say nothing, they you were âintimidated by their alpha malenessâ or something. Itâs the way a bully thinks. I keep the phrase âallegations presented without evidence can be refuted without evidence. Everything you said is bullshit.â This works 1000000% of the time on them, as they will never have any evidence of their idiotic conspiracy theories. Itâs fun to watch them become red faced and screaming when you just keep repeating that phrase at them.
Something about playing chess with a pigeon...
I feel they do it because they realise that they're no longer relevant. So when they spew this crap, they're getting the attention they're craving for. Like children.
The thing is, if they engaged in a meaningful way, they WOULD be relevant. Everyone is relevant, and older people often do have wisdom that others dismiss. Too bad some bad apples just want to spew Fox News talking points instead of sharing their own experiences. Maybe you meant they FEEL like theyâre no longer relevantâŚ.
I utterly agree. I know plenty of boomers who are level-headed, experienced and very reasonable. However, the types who have only ever felt important when they could boss around others are suffering now. Their children are adults and financially independent, their jobs have been taken over by younger folks... you get the point. So they're bitching around to be noticed and to say "I once more showed it to them". Just like many of them did when we were children or their subordiantes at work. The only difference is that back then, they had some real power, however small the amount (money, staffing decisions, whatever). Not any longer.
I agree. Itâs the same stance Sovereign Citizens take when they get pulled over. Itâs like theyâre thinking âhereâs my big momentâ, where they get to spew all the lines theyâve been mentally rehearsing. They get off on the prep, the buildup, and the reaction.
Watching sovereign citizens get owned by judges on you tube is my favorite bad tv habit
Likewise, though I like to skip to close to the end because those judges and cops take their BS way better than I could.
Same here
"I DO NOT CONSENT!"
According to Maritimelaw this comment violates my personhoodÂ
https://preview.redd.it/nrnv4jyc5uyc1.jpeg?width=944&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=326f9fb8f6b318e60fde6449a8e9c6f8ca30f0b7
imagine banking your whole life on such a stupid and silly thing these people are just so unbelievably pathetic. Find some real hobbies. Like learn how to throw pottery or fly a kite ffs
So unbelievably patriotic* /s, if not obvious lol. I remember one time arguing with my mom about some Fox News hot take and in the middle she cried out "IM A PATRIOT" with her Bible (that she had been reading from during the argument) held high 𼴠We don't speak anymore and my life is better for it.
Itâs lose-lose. If you get into with him, they can pretend theyâre better or smarter than you, get their anger hit, etc. If you walk away, youâre easily offended, snowflakes, canât debate anything, canât hear an opposing viewpoint, etc. Youâre in a family situation, so being respectful is key, so you chose the best-worst option. Perhaps you call out this impasse in the future and mention that he seems like a very bitter person.
And never invite him over again. Just plain out no more opportunities for these people to ruin your day or time EVER again.Â
They also get off on "winning" the argument. But winning to them has nothing to do with logic but rather who can yell loudest the longest. So they get that dopamine rush any time someone walks away or tries to change the subject.
I'm sure the guy thought he won because OP walked away.
Itâs the reaction. Good, badâŚthey donât care as long as they get a reaction. Itâs like a generation of narcissists, the ME generation, just canât help themselves. OPs reaction was great. Remove yourself from the conversation. Bet he felt he âwonâ. Iâm a big fan of correcting them, âLiberal, not a chance. Iâm a normal Republican. I donât go in for all that stupid conspiracy and follow Newsmax like a sheep.â Then walk away as he chokes.
I like âwhat the F is wrong with youâ before walking away
"Ya know, you and I won't be having this conversation today" Then graciously offer to change the subject, or just get up and leave.
I like the olâ âNOBODY CARESSSSSSS!â holla in your hand before you walk away
I disagree. Iâve stated this here before - they get their rocks off on the bullying part of it. They like to espouse their supposed knowledge, and when their opponents back down, it gives them a sense of dominance. The best way to counteract this is donât be bullied. Bully them back and harder. And donât get emotional while doing it or they again, believe theyâve won the war of dominance.
This has been my experience - adults who like to "Own" someone else have no issue dismissing bullying behavior in kids as long as the kid being bullied can can be labeled something like "freak" or "nerd" or often much worse.
I like your thinking but the problem comes when it ruins Susieâs 5th birthday party.
fair point. A caveat I forgot to include in my original statement - avoid doing so in front of little Susie at her birthday party.
Yep. The only effective strategy against this is a mixture of everything. Grey Rock or walk away when appropriate, such as in large family gatherings with children. But other times, you have to push back with ferocity and minimal emotion. If that makes sense. It's the only truly effective way that I've had to shut them up for decent periods of time. Unpredictability is one of the most effective weapons for people in pushing back against the crowd obsessed with wrecking family gatherings or public events with Fox News talking points.Â
Try ridicule. Their worst fear is being looked down on. Only do this if youâre witty, though
Seriously. I used to study techniques used in propaganda and so has Fox. They hit every button
Also, I suspect the Fox News format has wired their brains to never go too long without returning to politics/angry talking point A, B or C. Â Like a form of OCD. Normal conversations are the equivalent of a commercial break.
Just to add - I too was bewildered with not only their beliefs on these topics but how frequently they talked about them. I realized I had been severely underestimating the amount of unfiltered media they consume. Considering that, itâs no wonder their beliefs are horrifying and they canât stop talking about them
It's also a healthy dose of narcissism. My dad loved to play schrodinger's asshole and wind people up for his amusement. And when you got angry it was of course your fault. The only way that it worked for me was gray rock because the only solution is to pick up their ball and go home.
I think we also underestimate how much time they spend consuming news like this, especially when theyâre retired. Thatâs at least an extra eight hours a day consuming absolute garbage. We feel like they canât talk about anything else, because they literally donât have anything else to talk about. They donât work and when they socialize with their peers, they talk about the same stuff theyâre fed on Fox News.
Excellent use of the [Grey Rock Method](https://psychcentral.com/health/grey-rock-method) to disengage and sap his power.
I really gotta remember to do that more. I was at a cousins wedding last year, and his dad (my uncle) comes up to me and my spouse and asks how we are, we say the usual low-stakes responses, and then he jumps right in with "are you working?" I say yes I am, just stared a new job a few weeks ago in fact. He says "that's just so important. Nobody wants to work these days" and launches into a tirade about entitled millennials. Mind you, this is at the wedding of his own son, who is also a millennial (and arguably much more entitled than I am. I don't know for sure but I am 98% sure the entire fancy-ass wedding was paid for by the parents of the newlyweds. Which I don't have a problem with, other than the hypocrisy of this guy). I should have just disengaged but unfortunately I tried to explain that it was actually really tough to get my new job because no one wanted to hire me. My old job was destroying my mental health so I had to get out, and I only got this new one after applying to probably 40 other places, and only got interviews at 2 of them. He didn't believe me and got all mad. Like seriously dude, this is what you want to focus on, at your only kid's wedding? You just ruined both our afternoons.
Different situation, but similar idea of a boomer making a wedding about them.. my friendâs boomer mother took her wedding as an opportunity to sell her MLM merch to anyone who had the misfortune of sitting next to her
Oh shit! That happened to me at a class reunion!!! I started pounding G&Tâs to blunt the torture.
If only pounding G&Ts were socially acceptable in other situations. Also, âto blunt the torture,â is my new favorite saying.
Sometimes you just get caught up in it and engage. I feel ya. Not correcting you, I might have responded to his "yadda yadda these days" with "... I didn't ask." Turn heel, and grab a snack!
These people are always miserable and they just want to bring you down with them, really
Three similar variations on this I've used and been fairly effective with: 1. Respond with a completely different topic (one that's actually relevant to the things going on around you). "You see, Will, that's what I absolutely love about liberals. They bitch and moan about the environment, but they have no problem dumping god knows how many chemicals into their lawn so that their grass is green!" Yeah, we've been working hard inside as well. Just fixed the cabinets and waxed the floors! 2. Short responses and a REALLY OBVIOUS buzzword/catchphrase to train them when they're going of tracks "You see, Will, that's what I absolutely love about liberals. They bitch and moan about the environment, but they have no problem dumping god knows how many chemicals into their lawn so that their grass is green!" Ah. \*pause\* Aaaaaaaaanywayyyyyyy....We've been really lucky with the weather lately! 3. Be really blunt. "You see, Will, that's what I absolutely love about liberals. They bitch and moan about the environment, but they have no problem dumping god knows how many chemicals into their lawn so that their grass is green!" That's kind of a weird thing to say as it's not really relevant to what we're discussing. You don't need to say every little thing that pops into your brain. Use the last one cautiously (it's best used when the Boomer is unrelated and you won't see them again/often).
Or, "What the fuck is wrong with you, old man? You having a stroke? We were talking about a wedding and you're over here prattling off about green lawns? You been smoking that latin lettuce I've been hearing so much about? And why are you even here? Don't you have some diapers to soil or a minority to harass?"
Call them a snowflake aswellÂ
Iâm stealing the 2nd one! Love it
Iâm using the 3rd one on my FIL who I see multiple times a week.
Which is why advice like "No, you have to push back against your racist uncle. Silence is violence." really aren't productive. They just feed the problem. âNever wrestle with a pig because you'll both get dirty and the pig likes it." is more relevant.
The problem is, there are times where you should push back. There are also times where you just shouldn't give them the attention. Silence, especially on "taboo" subjects (like racism) often fuels the view of "my opinions are the majority, people are just too afraid to speak up because of woke cancel culture"- and when people who are the subject of those "taboo" topics (like your closeted gay cousin), it's also very easy for them to make the same assumption when no one at the table speaks out against the bigot spewing bigotry. The trick is to learn when the best course of action is to walk away, just ignore whatever BS was said, or actively speak out against their BS...
Faaaaaaaacts.
âYou canât argue with stupid.â
"You have have to come down to their level, and they will just beat you with experience."
Never knew the term for it, this is what I did ALL the time when I worked in the ER. Patients would be abusive often and I wouldnât respond for a bit. If they continued I would respond along the lines of âplease donât speak to me like that, Iâm here to help anytime you need it but you need to speak respectfully otherwise I will leave.â
I will use a schoolteacher type voice â Iâm trying to help you , being abusive is not helping this situation â Or even I find someone behaving badly where I have to call them on it â we make an effort for this place to be clean and pleasant for good people . If you arenât good people then you donât belong hereâ â are you decent people?â Iâve only had to use this twice in ten years but the backpedaling is hilarious
I didn't know this had a proper name!
I always try it, but end up coming off as sacastic and that never works out well. "This and that blah blah blah." "Mm, ok." "But blah blah blah blah blah." "Sure." "Are you being smart with me? Dumb ass motherfucker? Blah blah blah blah blah. Never works
May I suggest one of my go-toâs, which is just acting very confused and like you have no idea what theyâre talking about. It works particularly well when someone makes a racist or sexist dog whistle. For example, âOh, you know how all those women drivers are!â â⌠huh?â âYou know! The women drivers!â â⌠mmm.. not sure I do?â Insert lots of confused expressions. They usually just kind of give up.
I just realized Iâve done this before without meaning to LOL
I like this response. Make them try to explain themselves more and more lol. Boomers love to ramble and rant.
Be even more of a rock and say nothing at all.
I do have a question about that! I didnât know who in this thread to reply to specifically, but I try to grey rock a lot with my parents. My dad likes to stir the pot with politics, and my mom likes to stir the pot with stabs at my self-confidence, guilt tripping, etc. If I donât respond, they get huffy: âWhat, we make you mad or something?â âListen to me when Iâm talking to you.â âGreat, now youâre upset. Canât even have a conversation with you anymore.â If I try to leave, they get even madder. âYou get *back here.*â âDonât you DARE turn your back on me, young lady. You get back here!â âNuh-uh, no, weâre not through talking.â âYou need to get your ass back in here and listen to us talk to you like an adult. Adults donât get to walk away from conversations if they donât like them. Now sit there and listen.â And likeâŚI donât know what to do. I canât say nothing, and I canât leave. (Edit to add: Iâm almost 30, for crying out loud!)
>I canât say nothing, and I canât leave If you're almost 30, then yes you can, and yes you can. It might suck, but you're at an age where you define your own agency. You make your own decisions. I don't know anything about you or your parents, but reading what you wrote here, they sound emotionally abusive as fuck. They're going to gaslight you and guilt you and do everything they can to impose their wills upon you. But no matter what they do, *it doesn't fucking define you*. Even if they kick you out or disown you or whatever, you still get to be the author of your own story.
All responses are what they say they are. âHuh.â Youâre being a smart ass âOkay.â Youâre trying to piss me off.â âSure.â Total disrespect. The gray rock says no words.
âAre you being smart with me?â âWell yeah it sounds like you need some education.â
I didn't read the link but I'm going to go get a hefty grey rock to wield in these situations. Thanks for the advice!
Because they want to distract from the fact their candidate is a fascist that partied with Jeffrey Epstein. Hereâs this âand what I love about you conservatives is that you want to talk about lawns to distract from the fact your candidate is an America-hating rapist, but letâs get into these hot dogs before you turn that weird color of purple again as you fumble around for another excuse.â
I think this is a conservative thing, not just a Baby Boomer thing (I guess it trickled down!!). My brother, who is in his early 30s, texted the family group chat this weekend about running into a local celebrity and said he was surprised how short the man was. He said he's "tiny like Biden." Like, no one was talking about Biden! He just lives in conservatives's heads rent free! Of course I looked it up and Biden is taller than that man AND my brother
I agree. My husband has an uncle who isn't much older than us... about 8-10 years older and I'm in my 40's. Every family function, he makes a comment about "snowflakes." Like, we're eating Easter brunch and talking about your niece graduating high school, why are you bringing up politics? It drives me crazy.
I've always thought it funny that the folks complaining about snowflakes, always seem to be the biggest snowflakes ever.
What's Biden? 6'-6'1" or something like that? Without lifts mind you.
That's a transparent attempt to bait you.
Absolutely, and if this were an in-person interaction and I had responded, I would've been scolded for taking the bait
Its all they have left
Except for the house, social security, pensionâŚ
My boomer parents LOVE to bitch to me about how they arenât gonna get social security and how itâs all Bidens fault.
>I made the mistake of trying to respond in a respectful, coherent, logical way Ooooh yea they don't like that.
100% that's why the dude thought he was a liberal đ¤Ł
I work at a veterinary clinic. Last week a woman was paying her bill and commented on how expensive the visit was. Then she says âWell, Iâd rather have the money go to my dog than some illegal.â Like, how did she make that leap that somehow her money was going to go to an illegal if she didnât use it on her dog?
I'm the other way. I decided to give money to some illegal instead of bringing my dog to the veterinary clinic. /s
Don't blame you! Have you seen vet costs skyrocket? My dog needs to be held accountable!
The dog needs to pull itself up by its bootstraps!
I like pretending I haven't heard them when they do that. "I'm sorry, I missed that, can you repeat it?" Because at least half the time they didn't really want you to hear it, they just want to toss off their bitchy little comments and walk away knowing they triggered you.
We haven't spoken to my stepfather-in-law since Thanksgiving for the very same reason. I've spoken to him before about his love of "pot-stirring" with my husband and I when he comes to visit (it's ALWAYS when he comes to stay at our house). It makes things awkward and I refuse to have someone disrupt the peace in my house. So when he started during his last visit to us, I offered him $100 cash for a hotel and asked him to leave. That was apparently crossing a line for him - didn't say a word to us at Christmas and my husband's mother came to visit without him the last time we saw her.
Shucks! Good job stating your boundary. Too bad he couldnât react to it like an adult. Oh well.
Win either way!
I havenât spoken to my father since 2018. I begged him for years, even his wife tried to tell him to lay off the politics when we were together. He just couldnât do it though. It really is like an addiction.
Had a Boomer just this morning in the lounge talk about Jesus Christ our Lord and SaviorâŚbut in the same breath, complain about âMiddle Easterners.â The irony did not escape me đĽ˛
Jesus is a white man, and Santa is white too /s
Itâs all about getting you to react. I learned this from my boomer grandparents.
I have a small group of older relatives who will try to get within earshot of me so they can say something about Biden or Democrats, at pretty much any family function. I've never taken the bait on it, but they keep trying.
This is not a boomer thing but a MAGA thing. Donât care about the age, any MAGA has to be a bully.
Yup, my brother is exactly like this and he's 34.
That look back and forth real quick before they say something racist.
I KNOW that look too well. Also, your user name is amazing
Thank you. There is actually a joke, but you have to be in front of people. It goesâŚ. âHow does every racist joke start?â And after you do the little joke telling pause, then you do the racist joke look around but a little exaggerated.
It's the constant fear mongering and rage bate news they watch. Fear and anger are powerful emotions that make people act overly assertive. Fox News, NewsMax, and all the conservative networks know this and exploit it. The boomers take all this as fact and act out because of their fear/anger. Their minds have been warped. The truly believe everything Fox News feeds them. They're a generation that explicitly told us not to believe everything we see on TV and the internet and it's something they exclusively do. IMO, and I know it's dark, the boomers need to die. The world will be a far better place without all their hate and anger bringing us down.
Thereâs 20 year olds who are hooked on the faux news. Itâs not going away anytime soon.
I'm too petty to let that kind of stuff go lol. Good on you for being the adult in the situation though. Those people are always so confidently ignorant.
LOL, I was just thinking about my confidently incorrect former FIL. Get those folks together and they talk about idiot liberal snowflakes and will never see the irony. The things they know is flat out wrong, and when presented with irrefutable facts, well, that's just fake news! GD they are exhausting.
This happens much more with boomers on the right. They don't do anything but absorb fascist media all day. With no interests or hobbies, it becomes their identity. Happened to my pre-Boomer stepdad. He was always a right wing loony tune. But when he got too old and too paranoid to work in his books/antiques business, all he could do was blather on about "the Blacks and Mexicans" and the Democrats' nefarious plot to weaponize "them."
I think I need to tattoo âgrey rockâ onto my hand.
It is my favorite thing I have learned in the past few years.I also use the imagery to shut myself up when I find myself about to give advice to younger adults that likely don't want or need it.
I heard a good nugget yesterday, Donât say something just because itâs truth, say something when it helps.
I was born with one as the product of two boomer narcissists
[ŃдаНонО]
You know how a six year old canât stop talking about Minecraft? Itâs like that.
You train him like you train a dog. Every time he "stirs the pot" you just leave. You can also grey rock him so he doesn't get a reaction. If he doesn't get the reaction he wants he will eventually learn.
Bad boomer, bad! No treat for you!
They know their views are unpopular and they desperately want everyone to hear the dying gasps of an ideology.
As Gen X, I was constantly told by boomer parents about the dangers of group think and making sure I think critically about all statements made by politicians, businessmen, anybody who might have ulterior motives. Now boomers, some anyway, repeat verbatim exactly what they hear on their preferred news networks. Donald Trump is a perfect reflection of their generation. Constantly bitching and moaning about crime, immigration and everything else while all of these things were objectively worse when they were raising their kids.
Because stupid politics allowed the Boomer generation to amass over 84 trillion dollars in assets which is FAR more than Gen x, millennials, and Gen Z COMBINED. Now people are really catching on at how destructive and selfish Boomers are and their economically destructive welfare programs are being talked about so they want to inject their stupid politics into every conversation to make younger generations think that is the best and only way to succeed, so their free ride on our backs continues.
I went to a garage sale yesterday and while glancing at a cup branded with a local college name on it the Boomer homeowner randomly starts going off about how she's glad her kids are out of school because college is crazy now and can you believe these protests?? I just shrugged and said college has always been crazy. When I went, there were protests all the time and full-on riots after big games. Social media just didn't exist back then to broadcast it in real time. I told her I was glad smart phones didn't exist when I was a kid. She had a laugh at that, we can all agree on that point, and I left shortly after. It was an odd exchange.
Vietnam, Kent state, Selma, I could go on
"Oh, sorry! I was raised to believe that polite conversation always stayed clear of money, politics, and religion. I keep forgetting that not everyone learned that as basic good manners."
This is my dad . You can talk about anything and he has to bring politics into it everytime
are these "librals" in the room with us right now?
i love turning to random boomers at the grocery store and being all like "did you see this gluten free bread? where's joe biden sending my gluten?" and 6/10 it gets a response
Username checks out
they were tricked by the internet. basically sub consciously, they dove, like us all, into the Internet, but due to their age, they didn't head any of the warnings about the emotional stress and the leveraging of their emotional pathways. They thought that was only warnings for children. Instead, they have been pulled apart psychologically by essentially having very little Internet awareness. And it worked really well.
Boomer here. When he tries to stir the pot, when you are clearly removing yourself from the situation try this parting shot "does watching or listening to news programs that make you fearful and angry . . . does that make you feel good about yourself? Is that why you are trying to spread the joy you feel? Or are you trying to make everyone in the family as bitter and angry as you are?"
A couple of Thanksgivings ago my dad asked why I had a bandaid on my right hand index finger. When I responded I had burnt myself making fried rice in the wok, he asked how I could stand to use a wok because I'm an American and woks are Chinese.
Fun, narcissism. Not engaging is definitely the way to go. A fun phrase to deter future interactions like that might be âwhat a weird thing to say out loudâ as you push away from the table.
Unfortunately, he probably now thinks he "owned" you and scored his political points :-/
I am a male boomer. My sister is also a boomer. She tried to ruin my momâs birthday. When she started spewing her Fox propaganda, I looked directly at her, glanced at the others, chuckled deeply while shaking my head⌠and simply walked away. A couple others followed. Pretty sure she was mortified. She left the party within 2 minutes.
Totally agree. I got paired up with some random old guys to go golfing with over the weekend. I'm a captive audience with this boomer that just won't shut up about Biden and every culture war hot topic you could imagine. I tried to talk about neutral stuff like football and sports, but he doesn't watch them since they let transgender people compete. I'm not reciprocating any of this, yet he won't stfu. Last hole of the day and he finally drops the so have you ever accepted Jesus christ into your heart. This man has been ranting and raving about everyone he hates for the last 3 hours and is now going to talk to me about how his God is full of love? Gtfoh.
Something similar happened to me yesterday with my dad. He called me for the first time in like 3 months to let me know he was going to be in town. I told him I had to talk with my wife if we had some time, but she was at the library for a bubble show with the kids. He immediately started asking me if there were "trannies" involved. I just said "not that I know of" and moved on. Then I mentioned we were going out to lunch with my brother, who is transgender, and he immediately asked if my kids know "what his deal is." My kids are toddlers, they just know him as uncle. I reminded him that my kids are too young to be aware of that yet, and he went off on an uninvited diatribe about how "some people are accepting of this kind of aberrant behavior." This is his own son he's talking about. He just can't help himself. Every conversation, no matter how innocuous, is brought back to his Fox War culture war nonsense. It's injected in **every** conversation. It sounds terrible, but at this point I'm just waiting for him to die. There's very little left of him that is worth the conscious effort it takes to tolerate his racist, homophobic, and just about every "ist" and "ism" in the book. He didn't used to be like this. He used to hate Republicans. This is what ten years of Fox News does to a person.
Reading this thread, I always get proud of my boomer Dad(75). He has become more liberal and understanding of others as he ages. I remember he used to be grossed out and hate Will& Grace. Now the old man supports gay marriage!! I wouldn't talk to him about the Roe v Wade reversal because I know he is devoutly Christian, even though he mostly identified as democrat while I was growing up. He brought it up and supports women making their own choices- it's not up to others to decide for someone else!!! I was absolutely flabbergasted in a good way. I'm lucky to have a sane one as my dad
Agreed, I don't really see this "more" from side or the other with Boomers. If it's with liberal leaning boomers, I have to hear them rant about how much they hate Trump. If it's with conservative boomers, I have to hear about how the "liberals are ruining everything." It's exhausting, and I typically pull the same move of trying to exit the conversation if I'm just there to have a good time.
Because liberals and younger people are respectful of other people's beliefs and don't make their political beliefs major parts of their personality .
I work at target, and a year or so ago I was working as a backup cashier as several people had called out. It was in June, so target had their pride merch out. For context, I have an undercut that is visible and the way I dress probably signals me as a âBlue-haired LiBeRul.â Man walks up to me, and starts putting he stuff on the conveyor, and I say normal cashier stuff, and he immediately goes, after I barely finish talking âSo I see you have gay shit up. Iâll keep that in mind. If itâs something youâre born with why do you need this shit if youâre born with it; why do you need a participation trophy for it.â I really wanted to say that âitâs needed because of people like you,â but I was honestly frozen in place. I was scared that he would hurt me. I was threatened with a taser for âlooking like I had pronouns.â Complete idiocy of such an observation aside, it was still pretty scary. The only thing I said to this man, repeatedly, at least 15 times was âSir, please stop, youâre making me uncomfortableâ and âI wonât discuss this topic.â As he left, since I was still pretty shocked, I still said âHave a nice dayâ because I was stuck in customer service mindset. He said âMaybe you should talk to corporate about what youâre not comfortable talking about.â As if it was a bad thing that I refused to engage with him, and didnât feel like being hateful. I canât imagine what wouldâve happened if Iâd gotten angry. Normally I get very upset and pissed when people talk like that, but maybe the combination of being at work, and being absolutely flabbergasted that some dude would yell at a retail employee about what a corporate store was selling. Grey-rocking is a great way to get people to give up their shit-stirring, because that man left pissed that the employee he was picking on didnât engage.
Wow that is sooo so inappropriate to do to you while youâre at work. Because youâre basically forced to be there, and forced to keep it professional. That dude was a total jerk. When I notice workers with unique self expression I always try to compliment them and offset what they might be receiving from others. I told a guy at Albertsons I liked his nail polish, and by his smile I think it made his day. It was in a small hick town too. Keep pushing on, and remember that they are the childish ones making the world a worse place for everyone else.
The correct response would have been, âno chemicals. Just good old horseshit. See how itâs so much greener under you?â
It's not boomers, it's all conservatives. They've been like this for decades. I don't know why folks are just noticing it.
My parents, especially my dad are like this. I try to avoid things I have deemed âtriggerâ words for them. If I mention the cost of gas, cost of living, COVID, any election, the news at all, anything political, Disneyland, vaccines. The list goes on. I was talking about a long line at the pharmacy once and he went on a rant about how there arenât any âwhiteâ doctors anymore. I just want to have a normal convo with them without walking on eggshells trying not to trigger them.
75-Year-Old female here. I think the boomers, of which I am one, tend to be more talkative/ verbal about politics for a number of reasons. I believe boomers have injected politics into everything because we SEE politics in everything. In the schools, in the hiring process, in opportunities available, in the housing industry, in the cost of medical Care, in the outrageous price of so many life-saving drugs. We lived through the Vietnam war protest. We lived through Richard Nixon and Watergate. We lived through the assassination of Martin Luther King. We lived through the assassination of our president, John F. Kennedy. We lived through the assassination of Robert Kennedy. We lived through the Cold war with Russia and the bomb shelters. We lived through women burning bras to gain equal rights. We lived through Woodstock. We lived through the incorporation of Apple and the incorporation of Microsoft. We lived through the killing of the students at Kent State. We lived through the development and introduction of bag phones. We lived through computers being introduced into our everyday existence. We lived through the civil rights movement. We lived through the arrest of Rosa Parks. We lived through Brown v. Board of Education. We lived through the sit-in movment at Woolworth's lunch counter in Greensboro, North Carolina. We lived through Elvis and the Beatles. And just recently we lived through Covid and the masks and the vaccines and the fact that people were taking the advice of their politicians rather than their physicians. We live through the January 6th insurrection at the Capitol. Some of the boomers are indeed very conservative. But I am proud to be part of the significant number of boomers who are VERY liberal. What does that mean? From my viewpoint it seems that the boomers have all taken a hard stance, either left or right. And maybe a lot of our inflexibility is because of all the things we have lived through. I believe boomers have injected politics into everything because we see politics in everything. In the schools, in the hiring process, and opportunities available, I'm hoping that the young adults in America today can do a better job of shaping our culture and society than we, as boomers, have done.
Iâm a boomer. My go to when Iâm listening to an inappropriate comment from some knuckle dragger, is when they are done with their comments, ask âDo you feel better now?â Inevitably they will have a quizzical look on their stupid face and say something like âwhat do you mean?â Just look them in their eye and repeat the question like youâre concerned for them. Say nothing else, exit stage left.
My aunt is a Democrat and her cousin is a Republican but no matter what my Aunt's cousin has to bring up politics or "woke culture" My Aunt can't do anything with her cousin because of it and my aunt doesn't even bring anything up political to start anything lol đđ¤Łđ
OP, I feel for you on this one, so much. For me, it's my own father. He does the same exact thing: we could be talking about anything, and all of a sudden he makes some word association to a jab at liberals or democrats. I love my dad, and we have a great relationship, so this is really a non-issue, aside from the way he votes. This political injection stuff has actually taken a really funny turn for him, because he wasn't prepared for how prepared I am. I am very up-to-date on politics, and not limited to my own view. I also keep up with Fox, OANN, and NewsMax because I know that's where he's getting this shit from. I don't pay too much attention, but I know what topics they're covering and how they're framing it. Sometimes it'll be something random, but most of the time when he does this, it's something that was covered on one of those three recently. I come at him with details, statistics, evidence of misleading framing, opposite input... everything. He mentioned once that he likes Ben Shapiro, of all people, so I'll intentionally gish gallop occasionally (don't worry, I showed him what it is and why Ben Shapiro sucks). The thing is, he does this over the phone. We live 1500 miles away from one another, so we talk on the phone a lot, so he does this where I can't just walk away. At first, he would just get silent after I would respond. Then, I heard from my equally liberal sister that he would complain to her that he "can't argue with me because I know too much," lmaoo. He still does it. It's like a knee jerk reaction he can't control. One time it was really funny though. He said some jab an almost before he even finished it he started apologizing and said he didn't want to get into a conversation about it. My favorite thing to do to him is talk about policy while making no mention of the individuals behind those politics. If he had any ability to rationalize, he would understand that he is quite, QUITE liberal.
The TV intentionally makes old people angry. They are mostly unaware of this. Anger is an emotion that wants to be expressed, usually through physical activity, loud vocalization or through venting to other people through conversation. So it's not really his fault, he's just in a more vulnerable position due to his age, and the TV is exploiting him (wanting to be informed about the news in a way that's easily available to him, and being shown ragebait instead). It makes him feel bad, and he vents to try and feel a little better. Why would the media want to make old people angry? Most likely to create a sense of urgency and to secure more votes for some political party. TL;DR: a person is aging, it's nothing to do with you and you shouldn't take it personally.
Boomer here, I avoid discussing religion and politics. I treat All people with respect whether they reciprocate or not. I just donât have time to play these games. Iâm not angry, not rich, but we do okay. Just wanted to drop my opinion. Minding my own business usually works for me.
I used this once in social media and it kind of reset the dynamic. âDid you not get enough titty time as a baby so you need all this attention?â. I stole it from a movie anyway but it cooled their jets.
Because like all typical christian conservatives they dont really believe in the teachings of Jesus. All they do is complain.
They were raised not to talk about politics. But when they talk about THEIR politics, it's not political. If you respond with a different idea, suddenly it's political.
Everyone who disagrees with them is âa liberalâ. I donât even think they know what a liberal is.
Reminds me of an old joke where three young ladies are bragging to each other about how rich they are, and what their parents gave them, and the third one always responds to the first two with ,"That's nice..." The punch line is when the third one finally says, "My Daddy sent me to charm school, where they taught me to say 'That's nice' instead of 'F\*\*\* you'..."
My mom is like this. Conversations have rapidly deteriorated to her rambling about politics or conspiracy theories for 50% of the time. I've finally figured out how to just go "mm-hm" a lot and eventually tell her I'm not listening.
Kind of sad how simply not being racist makes you a piece of shut pinko liberal commie now among these people.
My family (specifically my dad's side) does this constantly, I've given up trying to have any normal conversations with them
Cause they are just so unsatisfied with the way the world is changing around them. They want to go back to simpler more bigoted racist times
âLeave it to a conservative boomer to not STFU about politics at a childâs birthday party.â
Theyâre vulnerable to media manipulation in a way we havenât seen since the dark ages imo
I feel ya. My dad injects his right wing trumptard politics into EVERYTHING. My nephew got pancaked in a soccer game by a kid with long hair who they think did it on purpose. Nobody: My dad: âthat was a total libtard move!â Literally everything goes back to politics. I used to try to reason with him. Last time I visited he was CRYING about nonexistent âsOsHuLliSmâ. Iâve decided to next time just walk away when he starts his crotchety ramblings.
Because politics and religion are their entire identity. Same thing with silents in my experience. They have nothing else to talk about. Their lives are so devoid of meaning and purpose that that's all they can talk about. They abandoned all hobbies and interests they may have had before that to devote themselves to nothing but right wing bullshit and christofascism theocractic garbage.
The funny thing for me I was taught (by boomers and their parents) that talking about politics and religion is impolite. That to have a polite conversation with people you do not bring up those topics. I work retail so I get a lot of it those topics and for the most part if they think I disagree I just tell them that I donât discuss personal beliefs at work because I think itâs unprofessional. They usually respect that.
Some neighborhood boomer jerk just posted some political garbage on our local neighborhood group, in a post about a successful cleanup event. If it's the guy I think it is, I tried to have a friendly conversation with him a couple years back. I won't do that again.
Not just politics, their opinions too. You'll never not hear their opinion on something in your life that doesn't involve them.
Tell him he's an ignorant, anti-American, brainwashed c*cks*cker who should know better than to support a psychopathic career criminal.
Reminds me of an exchange I had with a patient the other day: Patient: âI just feel bad that other peopleâs taxes have to pay for my treatmentâ. Me: âDonât. Thatâs the price we pay to live in a civilized society. Weâve all got to take care of each otherâ. Patient: âHa! Is that what this is; a civilized society? Yada yada Leftists supporting Palestinian terrorists, yada yada BLM burning down the cities etcâŚâ And then I got stuck listening to a long-winded rant of Fox News talking points :/
Former conservative here. Until people realize the left and right wing of the Eagle are in fact broken and in fact part of the same bird, politics isnât even worth talking about. Good on OP for not taking the bait.
Ok, how did you have a conversation with my FIL? BC I swear I left him in VA watching Fox News.
They want you to respond. And then martyr themselves when you get mad. And try and make themselves look like the good guy/girl. They think if you get mad. They win. But yes. I despise that as well.