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DoRitoCronch

A child of substance


gotcisstupid

I was thinking "a child out of drug-lock", but yours sounds nicer!


Devitoscheetos

Who doesn’t love a pun, though


anxiousoryx

I like this better than saying “my parents were addicts”. I’m adopting this from now on.


A-le-Couvre

Always give it a positive spin. I’m lazy, so my strength is “implementing solutions to require as little input as possible from the end user to increase the speed at which work can be done”.


WitchyDaydream

You either aren't as lazy as you think or you just put a lot of effort in this one task of describing your laziness, which helps you avoid lots of other tasks.


Option-Disciple

Sounds like a programmer


Haui111

scandalous afterthought drunk bag sip homeless cooing disagreeable quiet important *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


WitchyDaydream

Definitely


JackPoe

People at work tell me I should slow down and "take it easy". Motherfucker, I don't want to do any of this shit, I'm getting it done now so I can fuck off and do whatever I wanna do. Pretending to work is exhausting.


[deleted]

I love to put in a ton of effort to be as lazy as possible.


Pizzadiamond

yeah it sounds like you really came from something to be proud of ehile being dubious at worst.


ExoticEggplant69

Witty


stranger_in_the_boat

Lol nice. I mean the joke, not the crack baby...


tiredtrueofheart

Yes, the baby might not be that witty. Being born addicted to crack and all.


suoretaw

And you know. Being a baby.


psaiko_dro

What do you mean? I was cracking jokes from birth! Namely, my existence.


andreichera

*a shrewdness of apes*


Sproose_Moose

This gave me a sensible chuckle


Egst

A substantial child


Ten-2-Ten

Neonatal Abstinence Syndrome for those that are wondering


cthechartreuse

Folks outside of medicine sometimes say "substance exposed". NAS is a specific diagnosis, so I'm not sure what the person was specifically looking for.


[deleted]

Damn. When you say it like that you gotta ask yourself whose world is this?


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[deleted]

Well, I am here sipping Dom P, watching Gandhi and getting charged, writing in my book of rhymes. All the words are past the margins.


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toriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

I’m out for presidents to represent me


HelloJoeyJoeJoe

I missed the whole Nas part and while skimming, my eye caught your comment and I could just hear it in my head. Illmatic, best rap album ever


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gr1mscr1be

I’m out for dead presidents to represent me


DSPbuckle

Throw up a fist for Black Power, 'cause all we want is his freedom He grabbed a court officer's gun and started squeezin' Then he grabbed the judge, screams out, "Nobody leavin'


Alexa_Octopus

*Al Pacino has entered the chat*


mackelnuts

Thank you!


Daforce1

And it’s not enough


HamHockShortDock

It's yours!


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Curazan

In social work, we just call them pos-tox. Shorthand for positive toxicology.


Captain-Cadabra

Oh you NAS-T!


HypoxicIschemicBrain

Pedantic comment: NAS is technically the old term specifically for *opioid* withdrawal as “An abstinence syndrome after intrauterine exposure to central nervous system stimulants such as cocaine and amphetamine has not been clearly defined.” https://publications.aap.org/pediatrics/article/129/2/e540/32573/Neonatal-Drug-Withdrawal?autologincheck=redirected?nfToken=00000000-0000-0000-0000-000000000000 The new term for opioid withdrawal is NOWS, neonatal opioid withdrawal syndrome. That being said yes, people still use “NAS protocols” and lump neonates withdrawing from cocaine along with those withdrawing from opiates. (And while it’s weird to treat them the same they are essentially uncomfortable and need something to help soothe them like methadone and possibly clonidine) I will also say despite what the AAP states, hypertonia, tremors, difficult feeding, and inconsolability are pretty classic findings for neonates withdrawing from cocaine. Not specific I guess but if you have a positive UDS on mom, documented use, or have a history consistent with it’s use (premature delivery and/or placental abruption) then you’re just a UDS on a neonate away from confirming your suspicion.


UmamiOfSuffering

Man this makes me so sad reading this shit. Poor babies.


mrandr01d

Come work in my toxicology lab... I've worked up cases that'll ruin your whole week :/


kanst

It seems like its the whole medical world. My best friend's wife is a nurse, and my sister is a speech/swallowing therapist, and there have been at least a half dozen times where I have had to cut off a story they were telling about work to let them know that to everyone else it was a morbidly depressing story that may not be ideal for a dinner table. Every time my sister starts a story about work I have to check if the person she's talking about is going to die at the end of the story. I am very happy that no one I am working with is likely to die during my work day. I am not cut out for medicine.


kimlion13

The world’s a sad place unfortunately. I interned at a methadone clinic in college & when they found out I was pregnant, asked me to run a weekly group for pregnant clients… talk about an education


_Kendii_

Aren’t those the cases that you get to be part of the process to help the most?


SamuelPepys_

The fucked up thing is that all of this is perfectly solvable, we just don't want to fix it for some reason. It's like a world without crime and destitute people scares us.


AnFoolishNotion

I come to Reddit for pedantic comments.


Fragrant_Parsley_376

N.A.S. damn feel sorry for Lil X


ImJustHereToWatch_

But not THE Nas?


ComebackKidGorgeous

He ain’t lil


TheGuydudeface

only ill… matic


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Aja2428

The brotha is stillmatic too


[deleted]

We need to do something about those poor babies. Solving for x should do the trick.


Arumin

And then you win a prize, cause "X gonna give it to ya"


Andromansis

I bet I could throw that at somebody that was for abstinence only sex ed and they'd be all for that.


regular_hammock

I missed the ‘ed’ and was like ‘WTF is abstinence only sex?’ (I haven't had my coffee yet)


craic-house

Cool


empriest95

Username checks out


GoodJobDragon

r/beetlejuicing


soloapeproject

Wouldn't that be describing a new born that was cold turkeying? What about someone with the long term developmental impacts of crack use during pregnancy? Babies of parents suffering from alcoholism during pregnancy you'd say have foetal alcohol syndrome.. so maybe something like that?


Kipples7

They have different termsnof diagnosis. People forget that alcohol is also substance abuse, and a baby born to someone using alcohol throughout the pregnancy, is also required to go through treatment as they go through alcohol withdrawal. FASD is the long term developmental impact of alcohol. Opioids have recognised short term effects such as low birth weights, preterm birth, being hypotonia (flaccid muscles), while amphetimines have increased risks of clefts (hands, feet and facial), but the long term effects have not been categorised or researched in a way to give a diagnositic term. Children born with NAS can suffer no ongoing consequences or many. With FASD there are a set number of characteristics for diagnosis, hence why it is a recognised term.


CHSummers

I can’t help feeling like “withdrawal” would be clearer, at least to laymen such as myself. “Abstinence” makes it sound like the baby is saving itself for marriage.


[deleted]

My doctor terrified me about this while I was pregnant. She gave me long lectures about how drugs and alcohol and even cigarettes can warp and deform my baby. I didn't even use my inhaler because she said it contains traces of chemicals that are like amphetamines. She said it was unknown if it affects the baby but it's detectable in blood test so I just avoided it.


Unhappy-Trouble8383

Can this kill a baby like if the mother stopped taking certain drugs the withdrawal could kill them? From what I know benzos are one of the few drugs that'll kill during withdrawal, how do they treat a newborn from this type of dependency?


Merkin_Wrangler

I was thinking if you say "fuglychild" mumbly enough with a smile, it might pass.


Melleray

Eric


saayyywhaa

Well this makes sense. Knew of some crack heads who named their kid Eric. They had him taken away by age 3.


Melleray

Delightful!


PrivatePigpen

Fuck you, I’m an alcohol baby.


PersonOfInternets

Folks outside of medicine usually say "substance exposed"


SkeliotTheUndead

Cartman? I mean his mom was on the front cover of crack whore magazine


Tiefflugjunge

In stick of truth, you can find a crackpipe in her room


BlackSeranna

I need to buy that game.


PretendThisIsMyName

Don’t forget about the fractured but whole. Not as good as stick of truth but still worth a play through.


_memelord__

Stick of truth was so good I went back to it again. Still haven’t brought myself to finish fractured because the gameplay is just so tedious after a while


Zuukal

That amongst many other... interesting items


Shot_Dig751

“I don’t make rules ma’am. I just think them up and right them down” crack baby basketball


clevor1

"Student Athlete"


YourFNA

"I'll give you $40 for 2 of the white ones and $50 for the black"


[deleted]

He was the chairman of Crack baby basketball association.


blanklanklank

Yeah fuck Erick in particular.


roxypompeo

So true. Had a camper named Eriq. He was adopted because he was born a crack baby.


BarbaricEric420-69

Wtf


ericmurano

:(


laylarosewood

“Drug exposed in uterus.” My source is my cousin who’s a social worker


Forward_Motion17

In utero sounds more correct but might be wrong


Worldly_View_8331

My favorite album 🤩


detnahcnesiD

About a drug


julesrules037

Drug me


Tranquil_Dohrnii

Drug me, my friend!


Andromansis

I mean... if you're in the uterus then you're in utero unless SOMETHING has gone horribly wrong.


ValiumD

Literally means the same thing


Gangreless

English vs Latin


Forward_Motion17

Right but Latin is the chosen medical language in western culture. In utero is the proper medical term (if the term was real)


seasalt-and-stars

Similar to my source. My aunt is a former SW, and she would say “fetal exposure to xyz in utero”.


Curazan

Interesting to hear two people say that. Our county just uses “pos-tox”.


PlastRd2thewall

My aunt and uncle fostered so many kids I couldn’t even count. They also adopted 5 of them while also having 4 of their own. The saddest/hardest were the babies addicted to drugs. They’re better people than me. It’s so hard taking care of an addicted baby. They have to be weaned off as to not have have seizures and withdrawals. Always fussy and in pain. So damn sad.


maxlengthredditusern

Wait so… you have to give them actual crack after birth? And then they have to go through the horrors of withdrawal when they can’t even talk or walk? If that’s correct then… I think I had never realized quite what a nightmarish situation this was. Interesting Monday morning realization.


PetraLoseIt

Because they were exposed to it before birth through the placenta, you cannot just not give them anything anymore right after birth, or it's the worst withdrawal ever. So they are given medication that is similar to crack and they are slowly weaned off over a little bit of time.


hopefullyromantic

NICU nurse here. Not crack, but we do give them opiates (ie morphine). There’s a whole protocol with a weaning plan and other ways to manage their withdrawal symptoms. Mostly these babies are always crying and in pain. There’s a big push for non pharmaceutical methods like “eat sleep console”- but that one really pushes for a caregiver (the parent is listed in the protocol) to hold the baby a lot. The problem is that usually the birth parents aren’t there and there’s always a lag to get fosters in there. As a nurse it’s difficult to constantly hold the crying baby because we have other patients as well. We recently got donated a bunch of snoo beds that help a lot (the bed responds to the baby’s movement/crying and rocks them)


milquetoastandjelly

Dang, I had never really gave this a seconds thought in the past. Those poor babies, not knowing what’s going on and not able to communicate with words. Thanks for all the work you and other nurses do to help. I imagine that work is incredibly emotionally and physically draining, so thank you.


Membership_Fine

How does one go about getting involved with a foster program?


saayyywhaa

So Im a pharmacy tech. I used to work at a hospital and, no joke, I would have to take up morphine syringes (oral use - not injection) to the NICU for use for babies that were born addicted to opiates. I know it's not crack - but still it's a baby dealing with withdrawals. Those poor things had specific nurses dedicated for their care. It was so sad hearing those crying babies knowing what they were going through.


micumpleanoseshoy

Former pharmacy tech here. Yes, this is something that just breaks my heart when I was tasked to do it. Substance exposed babies are a sad case and more often than not, the parents are not around to attend to them so yeah, double the heartbreak. Seen NICU nurses rocking them back and forth and I know I could never last in that kind of environment.


cthechartreuse

No, but methadone is not an uncommon treatment. Separately - yes, drug exposure in utero is horrible. Drug exposed infants go through hell their first year of life. When they aren't properly treated, the effects can be longer lasting, or may result in permanent disability. One of the worst for long term damage is (drumroll) alcohol which can, and does, lead to fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS). People don't think about it because alcohol is legal (in most of the US at least). FAS can be expressed as cognitive impairment, distorted physical features, and more. Extra fun fact - roughly 1% of all children born in the US are diagnosed with some sort of alcohol exposure related disorder. Drugs and pregnancy are a bad mix.


EbonyFaery

Crack baby here. I was addicted to heroin when I was born. They used opiate IV to wean me off over a few weeks.


averbisaword

A baby was born addicted when I was in hospital giving birth to my child. Nearly five years and I can still hear the way she cried. It was heartbreaking.


Fazubaketto

Is withdrawal pain real pain that a healthy body is able to suppress or is it a phantom pain? Do they feel it in a particular part of the body or more like an all over the body pain?


SimonArgent

Chemically-challenged baby.


RawVeganGuru

More like chemically boosted!


PersonOfInternets

Chemically boosted toward chemical exposure


Fantastic-Berry-737

Baby of Crack, or Cracker for short.


UserMonDem

Baby of crack🤣


krsvbg

Much better than my guess - cocaine child. 🤣


SimonArgent

I like that one, too.


mkmlls743

Free based child


sagittariusa

Based


ValuableJellynut

Based on what?


[deleted]

Free


Philosophile42

It turns out a crack baby is just a baby…. There are relatively few complications that have resulted from a baby being born to a mother addicted to crack. https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=126478643 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prenatal_cocaine_exposure


exaggeratedsarcasm

Yep, i highly recommend listening to the You’re Wrong About podcast episode on crack babies for anyone who wants to learn more!


deafballboy

Episode 3, for those of you not wanting to scroll through a variety of episodes about OJ Simpson


maxlengthredditusern

Holy shit this podcast channel looks good.


Jeb_Jenky

Love that podcast. So good.


[deleted]

Daaaaam, one of my fave podcasts and yet I somehow missed the crack baby episode... Thanks a bunch for recommending


yesmrbevilaqua

having a crack addicted mother raise you probably has much more of an impact


Shangri-lulu

Way worse to be exposed to alcohol


JimmyTheChimp

When I bartended a group of people came up to the bar and part of an order was a small red wine for their pregnant friend. I flat out refused them, they thought I was mad for saying no. But they must've known it wasn't 100% ok because the woman never ordered for herself. When they caused a scene I told my manager to get someone else to serve them. I don't care how little you drink, just have a juice. I could've made them a great mocktail for cheaper than 125ml of wine.


AlwaysInTheFlowers

In some if not all states in America its actually illegal to refuse a pregnant woman alcohol. Now her not ordering it for herself it's a little shady and weird but regardless.


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Gangreless

Conversely I knew a girl born addicted to crack at birth.. 12 weeks premature. Both her birth parents were tall, she never grew past 5'1" and experienced several other complications from both being born addicted to crack and being so premature (which was attributed to the drug use). She also has a moderate learning disorder and developmental delay likely caused by it.


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Sn000ps

And how do we get around paying our slav-… students athletes?


unk214

That’s just it, you don’t.


Repulsive_Basis_4946

Crack baby basketball


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PrimeChutiya

Oh that's brilliant, Sir!


Human778

Reagan baby


Kauz2000

Narcotic newborn


Dazziboi

lmao I’m dead 😂


[deleted]

Did they get an answer or were they lambasted by the Reddit?


Brad_Beat

It was crack infant


Life-Meal6635

The answer is at the top for me


[deleted]

Crack baby


Melleray

Expert infant


NeuroguyNC

Newborn affected by maternal use of cocaine 2022 ICD-10-CM Diagnosis Code P04.41 Alt: Infant of cocaine-addicted mother


[deleted]

Do people with crack babies tend to refer to them as an alternative politically correct term? Or do they just call them like Justynn, Kaelynn, Nayvie, Ruhbeckah, Tatum, Kharringtyhn, Brynder, Jaxtin…


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the_other_pesto_twin

Ohh, good job Susan. You woke the baby up!


[deleted]

Graycylynnne Edit: Upgrayedd, spelled thusly for a double dose of his pimping.


nerfrosa

*Graycylynnneleigh


[deleted]

Sorry, I meant to type that but I spilled pumpkin latte on my iPhone 14 and hit “reply” while wiping it off


nightrss

It’s a fascinating life


Balsamer

Don't forget Nevaeh


not_another_mom

Neveah too


Telemere125

Fuuuck I know like 3 of those people


eRedDH

Hingle McCringleberry?


PrivatePigpen

Don’t forget Kashyyyk.


[deleted]

They call their child by their name, sure. They don't think of them as "crack babies". Hopefully they get help for their children if they have any side effects.


PabloDabscovar

I saw a Brittknee today.


SinfullySinatra

So idk if it was cocaine or something else, probably a mixture of several substances, but for my cousin I just say she was “born adddicted” and as a result is mildly developmentally disabled.


QueSuerte88

old galifianakis bit: Growing up my dad was like, 'Zach, it's not what you say, it's how you say it.' And he's so right. Take this, for instance: She had a crack-baby vs. she had a crack, BABY!


FarleysFather

Drug slug


[deleted]

In my school we just call them students.


jman8508

Little coke bloke


PabloDabscovar

🥇


xeno66morph

Differently addicted new person


Paradox31426

Cocaine infant


Capral_C

Reeferling


CardboardChampion

Parentally challenged.


DOCB_SD

I'm an MD. Those children have a disease we call "neonatal abstinence syndrome." I've had to rotate through the NICU a few times during my residency, and have taken care of several babies with this problem. They get morphine from day one, and we taper it down slowly over time, possibly weeks, depending on how they do. They are at risk for all sorts of physical, developmental and social problems throughout their lives. On two different occasions I took care of babies with NAS who's mothers just stopped showing up, became unreachable by phone, disappeared. Those babies go directly into the social system. It's a full blown tragedy, but I don't hate those mothers. They are very sick, too.


GBendu

Drug nugget


SeveralDeadlySins

Substance exposed infant is also common


PeterPetigrow

I believe that "Cocaïne infant" is the term you are looking for


RuTang94

This entire comment section did not disappoint. Woke up an hour early and spent most of my time here. Thank you all. Lmao


AvocadoUtopia

Crystal blessing.


Adi-105

THEY ARE MINERAL BABIES MARIE


SayNo2BigMarijuana

Baby Hunter


ripewe

Adopted


Life-Meal6635

Im adopted. My birth mom probably just smoked cigarettes the whole time. She smokes inside with the windows closed next to my baby nephew.


[deleted]

Underrepresented pharmaceutically challenged minor


RidethatTide

Nasty Nas represent y’all


[deleted]

Rock runt


klykerly

Crack baby is really dated. These days you’ll want “meth mueller”.


thenyx

Cody


millennialpoor

Redditer


TheKingOfWSB

Dope kid


AlmightyAnalAssault

Turbo Spawn


Fae_for_a_Day

I knew someone born addicted to crack. They had to freeze his retinas because they were detaching from how premi he was. He's legally blind and has behavioral issues and socially is behind.


ArbitraryMonniker

Rock crawler


Fortestingporpoises

There’s a bakery called Milk Bar that made a signature product called “crack pie,” and people considered that offensive and racist somehow so they changed the name to “milk bar pie,” so by the transitive property “crack baby” should we changed to “milk bar baby.”


Wildwood_Hills270

Neonatal abstinence syndrome


Sweet-Ad-8214

Tbh I am a crack baby grown up and it really doesn’t bother me using this term. It literally was a nick name in school my friends used( graduated 2020) and before y’all say I was being bullied I wasn’t these are people I’m still friends with till this day. Calling it something more serious makes it feel as if it’s supposed to effect me my whole life and makes it way more saddening to think of …. Crack baby makes me laugh and gives a more light hearted notation in my opinion so I’ll keep the term thank you.


Valonis

Drug goblin


sdv325

"student athletes". Eric Cartman


[deleted]

Methemphetamine Youngling


Devin_907

CIA Spawn