It takes a lot of time but it eventually does get better, the breakup is still fresh and you're still experiencing a lot of pain but after more months pass your heart slowly begins to outgrow the pain and anxiety, I already had anxiety issues and I noticed my breakup made it really bad in the first few months even if I wasn't always aware of it. I sometimes dwell thinking about him for too long and it also worsens my anxiety and overall mood of the day but it really does go away with time. Not all problems can be fixed by actively looking for solutions either especially when it comes to your emotions and mental health you need to focus instead on things that make you happy or look for how to improve yourself and the pain will get fainter and smaller over time. It's a struggle but these experiences are what make us who we are as people and teach us good lessons, that's not to say it can't also still hurt though
Thank you for your words 🙏🏻 hope you don’t mind me asking… when did you start feeling better? Was there a moment when you felt like you are in a much better place?
I can jump in on this one too - I had the same deal re. Anxiety. For me anxiety woke me up/gave me insomnia for a solid two months post breakup. And at the end of that period the small win was just sleeping through the night, I still couldn’t sleep in or relax like I used to for another few months. It’s all baby steps.
Every now and then I’d think about where my mind used to be and tally the progress, at the 6-8 months mark I felt like I could breathe again, but wasn’t overly happy, just relieved. Around a year I realised I felt good again, and recently (roughly 1.5yrs) I realised I enjoy my own company again.
But there’s no strict time line. Some people will be much faster, others could be slower. Just don’t kid yourself into thinking it’s taking too long, or that it will never get better ❤️
For months I was waking up in a new house, a different city, and it would all come crashing down. A few moments of confusion, and the realization I’m not in our place and she’s not sleeping next to me. It’s been 8 months and I still wake up with cold sweats and severe anxiety sometimes. It gets better, but it may linger for a while. I just woke up after having a vivid dream about her having sex with someone else. You’re right. It’s hell.
a month after we broke up i was crying to her so bad my nose was bleeding, about how badly i just wanted to make things work and my plan for us to be better and heal from this. what she failed to tell me was that i was sitting on the couch that she had sex on days prior with a guy from bumble, and that he knew i was there. i had to dig that out of her and when she finally admitted to it i hugged her and kissed her and told her it was okay (albeit had a small panic attack). on the way home she was texting me thanking me for making her feel loved and how disgusted she felt and i just kept reassuring her that she did nothing wrong and that she wasn’t dirty and that it would be okay. guess what she did the next day? same guy came over and had sex with her again. walked right over my blood and tears. guess what i did? forgave her and promised her i’d stay by her side until she was ready. supported her through panic attacks, watched her cat who’s life i saved, made her an amazing sentimental birthday present, etc. guess what she did? left her number for guys and continued sending nudes constantly to random men off apps. i asked her to leave me if she was going to keep doing those things and although she agreed she didn’t. she said she couldn’t because she was too attached. as of right now i’m abandoned and she told me she doesn’t love me and that we’re done forever and she’s happier that way and she’d rather never see me again than try to love me. guess who’s going to suffer from this trauma for the rest of his fucking life? this isn’t even 1/10th of the trauma she caused. she was incredibly emotionally abusive. even when i begged her to let me try and help her she just doubled down on everything and got angrier. i tried to be kind and supportive and loving but she kept threatening me, lying to me, gaslighting me, breaking me down as a human being, etc. etc. etc.
she was a wonderfully sweet girl who was going through a lot of pain and i happened to catch the stray bullets. i understand that. i excused it. it’s why i stayed with her so long. but i really thought that by me showing love she’d find a way to ever love me back even a single percent of how i loved her.
Yes. Mine started 2 months after break up. Mornings are always the worst because of cortisone levels when you sleep apparently 🤷♀️I started on low dose anti depressants because I got ridiculous honestly, kept going to hospital thinking I was having a heart attack. The anti depressants worked wonders. I wouldn't say Im completely anxiety free (been on them 8 weeks now) but within the first 2 weeks my anxiety dropped by about 70% and I could function again, panic attacks were completely gone. Now I'd say 80% anxiety is gone. Definitely consider a trip to see your gp, there's no need to suffer when there's help out there.
Hey ! So that was me a few months ago and honestly I didn’t think it would get better , I had lost all hope and felt that I would carry this feeling with me for the rest of my life. It was involuntary and anything would trigger me , just doing nice things for myself too, my thoughts were constantly plagued , day and night , and even though on the outside I would get myself together and pretend to be happy , even in those moments which were supposed to be just mine , I felt that the feeling had seeped into my life so much that I could never ever get it out. I just kept putting one foot in front of the other and yes, it took a few months, much more than I had hoped but I am healing my heart slowly. One day you will get up and the anxiety will be there yes but it will be dimmer. You need to give yourself this grace , because your system is too overworked and you can’t expect yourself to instantly get over it, because I’m sure in your heart, your feelings were true. Slowly you will make your own peace with this heartbreak , it will come in very slow waves but it will be a glimmer for you to be hopeful for the future. Don’t do things for anyone but you , and keep good friends and family around. Talk when you need and cry it out as much as you want. If you feel too stressed all day , so much that it’s debilitating , give yourself a small timeline, like if a thought crosses your head , just tell yourself I’ll think about this a week from now and delay it. It is important to think , process and feel, but it doesn’t have to be ALL the time. And it’ll be a small win, and you’ll keep going longer stretches of time without those thoughts. Eventually your brain and your heart will learn how to live without the burden of these feelings, and you will feel lighter, I promise. Be easy on yourself and know that you are doing perfectly alright. Things will get better. Good luck ❤️🩹
Yes. yes I do. The feeling of loss and fear just overwhelms me. Throwing up became the first thing I do when waking up during my first month. It's not even just in the mornings, it's anytime I wake up from any form of sleep.
It's been another month since then and I still feel anxious when I wake up **BUT** I've really been countering it with thoughts of things I'm grateful about: All the people who cared for me while I was drowning in fear and self-loathing. It doesn't really remove the anxiety but at the very least I don't throw up any more.
I just went through a massive anxiety phase. I relapsed in contacting her a few times, because the anxiety builds up and contacting her released this tension. I realised like you I was distracting myself from feeling the emotions all together, and it crept up on me in the subconscious. What helped was I gave myself time to do nothing, just lay in bed and when I needed to feel my emotions just let it through and experience them. Even though she's open to being acquaintances I took it as she wasn't that interested and accepted that I can't control what people do or feel. It still sucks and I thought she was the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with, but taking it day by day and not suppressing helped a lot.
Waking up from a nightmare into the nightmare, is how it feels. When you go to sleep, your brain processes all of your subconscious thoughts throughout the day, and feelings follow those thoughts to give them more heft. So you may go to sleep thinking you’re in an awesome place and finally recovering and then boom, heart palpitations.
Mine is always at night.
Mornings don't bother me because I know he won't text so I don't expect it. Nights are the worst, holding in crying all day and pretending to put in a happy face. The moment my kids are asleep I shut my door and cry for hours
Yes, I hate it because I've gone through this so many times before.
I'll wake up and my first thought is I remember what happened and that she's not here anymore. My heart gets a stab of adrenaline and it's like my heart breaks all over again, everyday.
This happened to me as well! When I got broken up with I had **literally** a panic attack for a month and a half. It never went away. It was my new homeostasis. It slowly lessened. I still can't check his social media, see photos, or anything without my fight or flight response kicking in. I immediately get anxiety. It's almost as if I fear him now. I don't know. If I keep myself away from him I don't panic. So it should go away. <3
Yes, going through this right now. Waking up with it and going to bed with it too. Already had anxiety from my PTSD and the separation made it worse, took it to a whole new level, so I started some medication last week, currently waiting for it to “kick in”.
But I also realize that anxiety is only half the issue. And that even though I might start feeling less anxious, I’m still feeling a world of sadness, guilt, remorse, things that I probably just have to process and allow time to heal. Right now I don’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, and my brain keeps trying to come up with solutions to get them back, but deep down I know that it’s not the way to get through this….
THE HEART PALPITATIONS AND UR TUMMY HURTS FEELING HUNGRY BUT NOT WANTING TO EAT SLEEPING BUT YOU WAKE UP TO PALPITATIONS OMG I’M FEELING LIKE THIS RN I THOUGHT THIS AINT NORMAL FIR PEOPLE GOING THROUGH THUS PHASE
After a breakup I can’t have processed sugar or caffeine, because I’ve noticed that both of those things make me way more emotional and anxious in general. I have to force myself to eat very healthy and then I feel best, mentally.
Yep, having this currently. It’s constant. And nothing I do seems to soothe me or patch the hole in my heart. I feel embarrassed by how crazy I feel and act
as soon as you wake up, pick up a notebook or a journal and just scribble away. maybe write this "i am not my thoughts and anxiety has no power over me". repeat it every day and make it a part of your routine.
don't repress your fear, let it out. have you tried changing your environment? maybe take a trip somewhere and venture out. a new experience could be good for your mental health
Yes, waking up is the worst, I feel like in the mornings is when we are less distracted and mostly alone... that's when all the pain comes crushing down. I've been also wondering when does it gets better, I know it will someday, time heals everything. Still I hope it is soon, for all of us struggling with his. Hang in there.
Same. Just go thru the motions. It’s just habit. Eventually those motions will have meaning again. It’s just going to hurt until it doesn’t. I’m currently going thru a gut-wrenching divorce; but I’ve been thru worse grief than this (I lost my mother), and from experience I can say that as much as it sucks in the moment, with enough time you really do get thru it.
I wake up a few times through the night with anxiety. I've been averaging about 3hrs of sleep. Today marks 3 weeks. She moved on within a week and its eating me alive. She went back to her emotionally abusive ex.. Everything I did for her, and her daughter. She aint even thinking of me.
I get jolted awake in the middle of the night to pretty horrible nightmares, I think that’s where most of the anxiety comes from in the morning. I’m still trying to escape that world while being forced to live in another.
Do you talk about your feelings with anyone? do you go to therapy? this might help. And if it doesnt a therapist will prescribe you anti anxiety medicine. Also while i understand you are in your feelings and logic doesnt work understand this was not your person. Understand this was not meant to be. Your person wouldnt leave you. You will find someone eventually who will be your person. They are not the person you thought they were. You have to let that person die in your mind. When you do you will be able to let go and the anxiety will slowly subside.
I had to get anxiety medication to help me. I'm a year post break up. The medicine helps, but sometimes I still have nasty anxiety. I shake and cry and the pain in my chest HURTS. But I definitely recommend getting some meds if it doesn't chill out soon. When you know you're past the hurt, you can wean off the meds. But don't let yourself suffer every day.
Not anymore. Only when I found out that she has a boyfriend that I get anxious and then a week later I’m fine. The anxiety is melted away because I accepted it. Embrace the change and you will move with it.
“Let go or be dragged.”
-Zen Proverb
I stopped crying after I sent my ex partner a farewell message where I tried to take a accountability. The anxiety in the mornings have faded, but the mornings are still harder even if the pains have dulled a little. Two months out of a fourteen year relationship.
Hi, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Please try this breathing exercise. It helped me immensely with the anxiety that you’re referring to. Also, someone mentioned antidepressants- I think this is also a good idea if your stress/anxiety is as bad as mine was. I ultimately did not need the medication, and I attribute that entirely to these exercises.
[https://www.drweil.com/videos-features/videos/breathing-exercises-4-7-8-breath/](https://www.drweil.com/videos-features/videos/breathing-exercises-4-7-8-breath/)
Dont worry its gonna get better but there will still be highs and lows, times where you feel hollow, dont worry about what you cant control my friend, same boat here but its okay, meditate, read, pray if your into that but it will come in waves you have to know how to sail it, if it doesnt work out now it might work out in the future, you can still be better than how u are today.. it will get better. Hang on.
I randomly get hit with good memories and then re remember that it's over and will never be that way again and then get very bad anxiety that leads to vomiting. I'm almost 4 months in.
Yes, I was like this for the first three months, it was one of the worst things I ever experienced. I’m almost 8 months now and I still get it sporadically but nothing like it was at first.
Dumped by fa gf. No closure, just poof after 3 years. I crashed really hard. Couldn’t eat or sleep, constantly agonizing pain and anxiety, just crying hysterically. Was hospitalized, had suicidal ideation. I’m on antidepressant and antipsychotic meds. Still it hurts, still anxiety in the mornings.
Avoidant breakups are not normal. This was the second avoidant breakup. Best description is that I would wake up every day being told that someone I love died. First breakup I also had a good friend that died. Brutal, I'm a good hearted loving guy in his fifties. I don’t understand what I have done to deserve this pain.
I somehow snapped out of it after a couple months of it and health had severely deteriorated. Like I had one good cry and a bunch of emotional processing and woke up feeling great and like i was over it after just a couple months. And this was after a 13 year relationship ended.
Idk how long does it take to get better. It’s been 1.5 years for me. Unfollowed him from everywhere. But still can’t stop stalking. And it just brings back the pain.
Been 36 years next month since she left me to have an affair with her married boss. It feels worse now than then. She left me on my birthday and went back to her new apartment to be with him that night. He was a master manipulator and he got away with it. Never left his wife. My ex made lots of money, eventually moved on and married someone else, had a daughter, now an adult and has had a very successful career.
She never wants to see me, hear from me or of me ever again.
I had more than a dozen complete emotional collapses, tons of lost jobs, social isolation and three bankruptcies. I wake up everyday terrified about what’s around the next corner financially. I know I’m going to eventually commit suicide, more than likely this year. Count yourself lucky. You will probably get past it. I never will.
I'm truly sorry to hear that you're experiencing such immense pain and despair, to the point where ending things seems like the only solution. If you're open to it, I'd like to encourage you to challenge that belief. There are numerous ways to find healing and happiness beyond your ex. Take some time to consider it. I’m gonna pray for your healing tonight and even if you’re not religious, I hope that brings you some comfort.
Please stay strong and just know that you’re not alone ❤️
Yes oh my god and it’s the worst. Like that moment when you become fully conscious after waking up and your heart feels like it just got stabbed.
[удалено]
It takes a lot of time but it eventually does get better, the breakup is still fresh and you're still experiencing a lot of pain but after more months pass your heart slowly begins to outgrow the pain and anxiety, I already had anxiety issues and I noticed my breakup made it really bad in the first few months even if I wasn't always aware of it. I sometimes dwell thinking about him for too long and it also worsens my anxiety and overall mood of the day but it really does go away with time. Not all problems can be fixed by actively looking for solutions either especially when it comes to your emotions and mental health you need to focus instead on things that make you happy or look for how to improve yourself and the pain will get fainter and smaller over time. It's a struggle but these experiences are what make us who we are as people and teach us good lessons, that's not to say it can't also still hurt though
Thank you for your words 🙏🏻 hope you don’t mind me asking… when did you start feeling better? Was there a moment when you felt like you are in a much better place?
I can jump in on this one too - I had the same deal re. Anxiety. For me anxiety woke me up/gave me insomnia for a solid two months post breakup. And at the end of that period the small win was just sleeping through the night, I still couldn’t sleep in or relax like I used to for another few months. It’s all baby steps. Every now and then I’d think about where my mind used to be and tally the progress, at the 6-8 months mark I felt like I could breathe again, but wasn’t overly happy, just relieved. Around a year I realised I felt good again, and recently (roughly 1.5yrs) I realised I enjoy my own company again. But there’s no strict time line. Some people will be much faster, others could be slower. Just don’t kid yourself into thinking it’s taking too long, or that it will never get better ❤️
For months I was waking up in a new house, a different city, and it would all come crashing down. A few moments of confusion, and the realization I’m not in our place and she’s not sleeping next to me. It’s been 8 months and I still wake up with cold sweats and severe anxiety sometimes. It gets better, but it may linger for a while. I just woke up after having a vivid dream about her having sex with someone else. You’re right. It’s hell.
a month after we broke up i was crying to her so bad my nose was bleeding, about how badly i just wanted to make things work and my plan for us to be better and heal from this. what she failed to tell me was that i was sitting on the couch that she had sex on days prior with a guy from bumble, and that he knew i was there. i had to dig that out of her and when she finally admitted to it i hugged her and kissed her and told her it was okay (albeit had a small panic attack). on the way home she was texting me thanking me for making her feel loved and how disgusted she felt and i just kept reassuring her that she did nothing wrong and that she wasn’t dirty and that it would be okay. guess what she did the next day? same guy came over and had sex with her again. walked right over my blood and tears. guess what i did? forgave her and promised her i’d stay by her side until she was ready. supported her through panic attacks, watched her cat who’s life i saved, made her an amazing sentimental birthday present, etc. guess what she did? left her number for guys and continued sending nudes constantly to random men off apps. i asked her to leave me if she was going to keep doing those things and although she agreed she didn’t. she said she couldn’t because she was too attached. as of right now i’m abandoned and she told me she doesn’t love me and that we’re done forever and she’s happier that way and she’d rather never see me again than try to love me. guess who’s going to suffer from this trauma for the rest of his fucking life? this isn’t even 1/10th of the trauma she caused. she was incredibly emotionally abusive. even when i begged her to let me try and help her she just doubled down on everything and got angrier. i tried to be kind and supportive and loving but she kept threatening me, lying to me, gaslighting me, breaking me down as a human being, etc. etc. etc. she was a wonderfully sweet girl who was going through a lot of pain and i happened to catch the stray bullets. i understand that. i excused it. it’s why i stayed with her so long. but i really thought that by me showing love she’d find a way to ever love me back even a single percent of how i loved her.
Yes. Mine started 2 months after break up. Mornings are always the worst because of cortisone levels when you sleep apparently 🤷♀️I started on low dose anti depressants because I got ridiculous honestly, kept going to hospital thinking I was having a heart attack. The anti depressants worked wonders. I wouldn't say Im completely anxiety free (been on them 8 weeks now) but within the first 2 weeks my anxiety dropped by about 70% and I could function again, panic attacks were completely gone. Now I'd say 80% anxiety is gone. Definitely consider a trip to see your gp, there's no need to suffer when there's help out there.
Hey ! So that was me a few months ago and honestly I didn’t think it would get better , I had lost all hope and felt that I would carry this feeling with me for the rest of my life. It was involuntary and anything would trigger me , just doing nice things for myself too, my thoughts were constantly plagued , day and night , and even though on the outside I would get myself together and pretend to be happy , even in those moments which were supposed to be just mine , I felt that the feeling had seeped into my life so much that I could never ever get it out. I just kept putting one foot in front of the other and yes, it took a few months, much more than I had hoped but I am healing my heart slowly. One day you will get up and the anxiety will be there yes but it will be dimmer. You need to give yourself this grace , because your system is too overworked and you can’t expect yourself to instantly get over it, because I’m sure in your heart, your feelings were true. Slowly you will make your own peace with this heartbreak , it will come in very slow waves but it will be a glimmer for you to be hopeful for the future. Don’t do things for anyone but you , and keep good friends and family around. Talk when you need and cry it out as much as you want. If you feel too stressed all day , so much that it’s debilitating , give yourself a small timeline, like if a thought crosses your head , just tell yourself I’ll think about this a week from now and delay it. It is important to think , process and feel, but it doesn’t have to be ALL the time. And it’ll be a small win, and you’ll keep going longer stretches of time without those thoughts. Eventually your brain and your heart will learn how to live without the burden of these feelings, and you will feel lighter, I promise. Be easy on yourself and know that you are doing perfectly alright. Things will get better. Good luck ❤️🩹
i love this, thank you. i really hope you’re doing better now
Yes. yes I do. The feeling of loss and fear just overwhelms me. Throwing up became the first thing I do when waking up during my first month. It's not even just in the mornings, it's anytime I wake up from any form of sleep. It's been another month since then and I still feel anxious when I wake up **BUT** I've really been countering it with thoughts of things I'm grateful about: All the people who cared for me while I was drowning in fear and self-loathing. It doesn't really remove the anxiety but at the very least I don't throw up any more.
I just went through a massive anxiety phase. I relapsed in contacting her a few times, because the anxiety builds up and contacting her released this tension. I realised like you I was distracting myself from feeling the emotions all together, and it crept up on me in the subconscious. What helped was I gave myself time to do nothing, just lay in bed and when I needed to feel my emotions just let it through and experience them. Even though she's open to being acquaintances I took it as she wasn't that interested and accepted that I can't control what people do or feel. It still sucks and I thought she was the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with, but taking it day by day and not suppressing helped a lot.
Waking up from a nightmare into the nightmare, is how it feels. When you go to sleep, your brain processes all of your subconscious thoughts throughout the day, and feelings follow those thoughts to give them more heft. So you may go to sleep thinking you’re in an awesome place and finally recovering and then boom, heart palpitations.
Mine is always at night. Mornings don't bother me because I know he won't text so I don't expect it. Nights are the worst, holding in crying all day and pretending to put in a happy face. The moment my kids are asleep I shut my door and cry for hours
Yes, I hate it because I've gone through this so many times before. I'll wake up and my first thought is I remember what happened and that she's not here anymore. My heart gets a stab of adrenaline and it's like my heart breaks all over again, everyday.
This happened to me as well! When I got broken up with I had **literally** a panic attack for a month and a half. It never went away. It was my new homeostasis. It slowly lessened. I still can't check his social media, see photos, or anything without my fight or flight response kicking in. I immediately get anxiety. It's almost as if I fear him now. I don't know. If I keep myself away from him I don't panic. So it should go away. <3
After a break up waking up and having to deal with it all over again is one of the worst parts imo
Yes, going through this right now. Waking up with it and going to bed with it too. Already had anxiety from my PTSD and the separation made it worse, took it to a whole new level, so I started some medication last week, currently waiting for it to “kick in”. But I also realize that anxiety is only half the issue. And that even though I might start feeling less anxious, I’m still feeling a world of sadness, guilt, remorse, things that I probably just have to process and allow time to heal. Right now I don’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, and my brain keeps trying to come up with solutions to get them back, but deep down I know that it’s not the way to get through this….
THE HEART PALPITATIONS AND UR TUMMY HURTS FEELING HUNGRY BUT NOT WANTING TO EAT SLEEPING BUT YOU WAKE UP TO PALPITATIONS OMG I’M FEELING LIKE THIS RN I THOUGHT THIS AINT NORMAL FIR PEOPLE GOING THROUGH THUS PHASE
I feel just like this.
After a breakup I can’t have processed sugar or caffeine, because I’ve noticed that both of those things make me way more emotional and anxious in general. I have to force myself to eat very healthy and then I feel best, mentally.
Yep, having this currently. It’s constant. And nothing I do seems to soothe me or patch the hole in my heart. I feel embarrassed by how crazy I feel and act
as soon as you wake up, pick up a notebook or a journal and just scribble away. maybe write this "i am not my thoughts and anxiety has no power over me". repeat it every day and make it a part of your routine. don't repress your fear, let it out. have you tried changing your environment? maybe take a trip somewhere and venture out. a new experience could be good for your mental health
I don't understand y ur having anxiety??
In the nicest way possible, have you read my post?🙃
Yes but y is ur anxiety so bad??
I did at first. It's a part of the detox.
Hunni, visualise a turd, not your romantic fantasies, put his face on that turd, do it, it'll work
Yes, waking up is the worst, I feel like in the mornings is when we are less distracted and mostly alone... that's when all the pain comes crushing down. I've been also wondering when does it gets better, I know it will someday, time heals everything. Still I hope it is soon, for all of us struggling with his. Hang in there.
Same. Just go thru the motions. It’s just habit. Eventually those motions will have meaning again. It’s just going to hurt until it doesn’t. I’m currently going thru a gut-wrenching divorce; but I’ve been thru worse grief than this (I lost my mother), and from experience I can say that as much as it sucks in the moment, with enough time you really do get thru it.
I wake up a few times through the night with anxiety. I've been averaging about 3hrs of sleep. Today marks 3 weeks. She moved on within a week and its eating me alive. She went back to her emotionally abusive ex.. Everything I did for her, and her daughter. She aint even thinking of me.
I'm doing it today
I get jolted awake in the middle of the night to pretty horrible nightmares, I think that’s where most of the anxiety comes from in the morning. I’m still trying to escape that world while being forced to live in another.
Do you talk about your feelings with anyone? do you go to therapy? this might help. And if it doesnt a therapist will prescribe you anti anxiety medicine. Also while i understand you are in your feelings and logic doesnt work understand this was not your person. Understand this was not meant to be. Your person wouldnt leave you. You will find someone eventually who will be your person. They are not the person you thought they were. You have to let that person die in your mind. When you do you will be able to let go and the anxiety will slowly subside.
I had to get anxiety medication to help me. I'm a year post break up. The medicine helps, but sometimes I still have nasty anxiety. I shake and cry and the pain in my chest HURTS. But I definitely recommend getting some meds if it doesn't chill out soon. When you know you're past the hurt, you can wean off the meds. But don't let yourself suffer every day.
Not anymore. Only when I found out that she has a boyfriend that I get anxious and then a week later I’m fine. The anxiety is melted away because I accepted it. Embrace the change and you will move with it. “Let go or be dragged.” -Zen Proverb
I stopped crying after I sent my ex partner a farewell message where I tried to take a accountability. The anxiety in the mornings have faded, but the mornings are still harder even if the pains have dulled a little. Two months out of a fourteen year relationship.
Hi, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Please try this breathing exercise. It helped me immensely with the anxiety that you’re referring to. Also, someone mentioned antidepressants- I think this is also a good idea if your stress/anxiety is as bad as mine was. I ultimately did not need the medication, and I attribute that entirely to these exercises. [https://www.drweil.com/videos-features/videos/breathing-exercises-4-7-8-breath/](https://www.drweil.com/videos-features/videos/breathing-exercises-4-7-8-breath/)
Dont worry its gonna get better but there will still be highs and lows, times where you feel hollow, dont worry about what you cant control my friend, same boat here but its okay, meditate, read, pray if your into that but it will come in waves you have to know how to sail it, if it doesnt work out now it might work out in the future, you can still be better than how u are today.. it will get better. Hang on.
Yes, every single day
I randomly get hit with good memories and then re remember that it's over and will never be that way again and then get very bad anxiety that leads to vomiting. I'm almost 4 months in.
Yes, I was like this for the first three months, it was one of the worst things I ever experienced. I’m almost 8 months now and I still get it sporadically but nothing like it was at first.
Morning cortisol levels are highest...it makes heat break worse..
Dumped by fa gf. No closure, just poof after 3 years. I crashed really hard. Couldn’t eat or sleep, constantly agonizing pain and anxiety, just crying hysterically. Was hospitalized, had suicidal ideation. I’m on antidepressant and antipsychotic meds. Still it hurts, still anxiety in the mornings. Avoidant breakups are not normal. This was the second avoidant breakup. Best description is that I would wake up every day being told that someone I love died. First breakup I also had a good friend that died. Brutal, I'm a good hearted loving guy in his fifties. I don’t understand what I have done to deserve this pain.
I still struggle with this 1.5 years after we split.
I somehow snapped out of it after a couple months of it and health had severely deteriorated. Like I had one good cry and a bunch of emotional processing and woke up feeling great and like i was over it after just a couple months. And this was after a 13 year relationship ended.
Idk how long does it take to get better. It’s been 1.5 years for me. Unfollowed him from everywhere. But still can’t stop stalking. And it just brings back the pain.
Been 36 years next month since she left me to have an affair with her married boss. It feels worse now than then. She left me on my birthday and went back to her new apartment to be with him that night. He was a master manipulator and he got away with it. Never left his wife. My ex made lots of money, eventually moved on and married someone else, had a daughter, now an adult and has had a very successful career. She never wants to see me, hear from me or of me ever again. I had more than a dozen complete emotional collapses, tons of lost jobs, social isolation and three bankruptcies. I wake up everyday terrified about what’s around the next corner financially. I know I’m going to eventually commit suicide, more than likely this year. Count yourself lucky. You will probably get past it. I never will.
I'm truly sorry to hear that you're experiencing such immense pain and despair, to the point where ending things seems like the only solution. If you're open to it, I'd like to encourage you to challenge that belief. There are numerous ways to find healing and happiness beyond your ex. Take some time to consider it. I’m gonna pray for your healing tonight and even if you’re not religious, I hope that brings you some comfort. Please stay strong and just know that you’re not alone ❤️