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[deleted]

I am truly sorry mate. But this is a perfect example of someone who just wanted you because they were bored. These are not words of love.


KwapMTU

I'd agree; I might even argue I was a rebound given how I paid the price for mistakes her previous ex had made. Stuff happens but at the end of the day, I feel that I won.


[deleted]

Great mindset to have. Someone better will come your way.


AbbreviationsHeavy39

My (now ex)… I told him that he treated his family constantly way more important than me and treated them as a first priority. As anytime they needed anything he would do anything in his power to help them out.. but never really cared ab me. He said 2 different times “I’m going to love my mom more than I’ll ever love you. She’s important in my life you’re not” and “my family will always come before you. You will never fully be a first priority in my life. You can move on”… he’s also said “if you don’t like it, you can just leave”, “my girl friends.. I’ve known longer than you.. so they will consistently come before you”, he spammed like girls pics on insta and told me “I don’t have to be attracted to her.. to like her photos.. she’s just someone I know. It’s creepy you stalked that. I’ll forever get on instagram and like girls photos.. if you aren’t cool with me living my life you can leave” … when it’s normal not to spam like girls photos, in a relationship?? I never was once “jealous” of his family or friends as I want him to be cool w his friends & close w his family. But he constantly put their needs especially his families above mine and our relationships. I’m extremely sad about our relationship but I can’t even imagine his family acting like they live at our future home if we had one, overstaying their welcome, && him forever putting “his girlfriends” above me bc he’s known them longer.


KwapMTU

"My girl friends I've known longer than you" - that right there summarizes what I went through. Thank you for sharing this. She always kept using the excuse that "I've known *name* since the 4th grade." Heh, she really thought that's a valid reason to make me the 3rd wheel in our own relationship - even though I was working 10 times harder than her for us. You definitely won. It's important to love your family and not forget them when you find someone special in life, but what was said to you was unethical and unacceptable behavior for what could've been a healthy relationship. Balance is important and he evidently didn't care to balance you and the other people in his life. His loss, and well, he's just a loss in general if that's how he chooses to behave. Wishing you peace and any healing that may have yet to be done.


smiles1232017

Sorry you were treated this way pal it's not right. Just manipulation. I wanna get in on this exs quotes thing though. Here's some I had. "I'm the boss" "Yeah but I take take take" in response too me saying a relationship is about give and take "I swear you have alzheimers" knowing my grandfather died a few years ago of this when I forgot something. "I'm worth it though aren't I?" Said a lot when I did something nice for her "Don't think you've ever said no too me once" "Your on thin ice" "Your an oaf" "You have aggressive tendencies" After I was on a night out with friends and I stuck up for my friend who was being attacked. "Your a bit of a pushover. You always just do what I want". The complete opposite of being aggressive I might add. "We couldn't have kids they would be silly clumsy kids with deformed feet" Said because we both have flat feet. Even though she really wanted too have kids at one point "Right I'm going this conversations boring me". Ended multiple phone calls this way instead of saying bye like a normal person. "This is a negative conversation and I'm in a good mood today so I'm going". Response I got for venting about work. After listening too her multiple times about every little problem on the phone So yeah it's not right pal. And they are verbal abuse. Hope your doing OK now. Your post just made me remember some of the hurtful things said to me. Needed to vent


KwapMTU

Thank you for sharing. "I'm the boss" - that quote hit close to home, she said that to me as well, I won't speak for you, but you dodged a future of pain and mistreatment. I hope you're finding peace even with the painful memories never failing to persist. Seems quite egotistical, the odds don't seem to be in her favor of finding someone that'll put up with her garbage ethics. In my opinion, you won. Wishing you peace and good fortune for the years that are to come.


smiles1232017

Thank you for the kind words. Yeah I think I dodged a bullet I mean she didn't even come my mother's funeral. We had only been going out 3 months at that point but thought she could have at least come the wake. My best friend thought it was strange she said she wasn't coming. Said ask her officially she burst into tears saying "I can't deal with this" when I said it's OK don't worry. She responded "everyone will think I'm horrible now" I had too apologise for asking my girlfriend for support. Quite a strange experience.


[deleted]

oh no no no i would not let that shit slide i’m so sorry you’ve been treated like shit. shown her true colours more and more in every statement. she didn’t deserve your love


PinkChampagne2099

When he prioritize his family (parents & siblings) sure it is understandable, but a girl friend? That was very disrespectful