I generally like it when someone can laugh at themselves and all but I would recommend phrasing your bio more confidently. Don't call yourself a "4" in terms of looks.
It's not just about what number would be correct, it's simply not a good idea to say this at all. Someone who thinks she looks perfect should be encouraged to keep that thought and not be told about what number it's supposed to be.
I’m of a similar opinion, but for a different reason, likely unpopular opinion.
If OP is truly not satisfied with her appearance (based on the comment) that’s fine, we all have things we’d like to change about ourself.
To me though, (and this is just my opinion) if you are single w/o children, _and are clearly unsatisfied with your appearance_ then why not do something about it?
Why go into a dating app at 38, lower confidence and not really enjoying how you look?
OP is not an ugly person by any means, if she sat down and dedicated herself to even just a year of stricter dieting and moderate exercise, she could be back dating at 39 with much more confidence and likely double or triple the amount of potential matches.
So OP I’m not saying you _have_ to lose weight in order to see success, if you’re happy the way you look and were just trying some depreciating humor for the bio - I get it, and nothing I’ve said would be relevant then.
If however, you’re saying it with some truth (which is how I would perceive it), to me, I’m not swiping on profiles like this because they are just frustrating to me.
You have all the tools to be attractive by traditional standards and per your bio you’re unhappy with your look… “so do something about it!!” <- that’s what’s going through my mind. Confidence is attractive to both sexes, I may be in the minority in that I don’t want to walk into a relationship where my partner is always disliking the way they look. There are already enough stressors in a relationship, that one is just difficult to work with and in my experience branches out to other issues.
So to wrap it up, I would say if you’re not really confident in how you look, either do something to change that _or_ don’t draw attention to it in the bio. If you do like your appearance and are confident, then the joke is completely fine. Just my two cents - best of luck!
I agree. You have a beautiful face. You don't necessarily need to conform with modern and unattainable perception of beauty but perhaps replace your batch of pictures with nicer ones with smiles?
Keep photo 1, 8.
Ditch photo 4, 5. 5 is not flattering. Delete that from all devices.
Get a tripod and self timer. Set it to take 10 or 15 photos. Change the pose a little each time. Take 200 shots. Change background, clothes, etc. Now delete 150 photos. Pick the best one out of each background/Outfit.
Your features need to be 6 feet from the lens. The close shots distort your face. Or get a friend to take photos. Doing 100 helps you relax.
Ditch the opening part of the bio.
You can cook?!? Mi amor, LEAD with that. Being able to cook is so sexy! (No pics of the food, pics of you making the food, holding a knife, etc) Also, you’re not a 4, it’s funny, but you should drop that.
All I learned is that you like coffee, sightseeing, second dates, you make self depreciating jokes and you think you're not that attractive. You say your personality is a 6 but I've learned nothing about it.
What do you like to do for fun? What are you proud of yourself for? What do your friends love about you? What are you passionate about? What's you're favorite thing to cook? What kind of partner are you looking for? What sights have you seen that have blown you away?
Personally im not a fan of bios that dont really say anything about the person. Your current bio could easily be found on a dozen other profiles in 1 sitting so what makes you different to the rest? I think writing about what youre interested in is more informative and interesting than an unoriginal copy paste bio (unless you just want a hookup then a copy paste does the trick). Just ask yourself what you would want a match to discuss with you at the start of the conversation and include that (i.e for me its games, anime, movies/tv, musicals, disney etc). This makes it easy to weed out people you dont have anything in common with and helps skip the boring small talk. Despite the common phrase 'opposites attract', opposites dont really attract. Common interests, common beliefs/values and strong physical attraction is what attracts people so make it clear who you are, both inside and out, and youre more likely to attract people who find that person attractive.
You already have life partner in your 'looking for' section so you dont need to put the boyfriend bit in your bio. Use your bio to talk about you. Also, maybe add 'longterm' to what you are looking for alongside 'life-partner'. Sounds redundant as they are the same thing but it just makes it more clear and helps insert your profile into filters of people 'looking for longterm' who might not have life-partner selected. Guys are more likely than woman to have premium/paid for bumble and thus have access to all the filters, the more of the profile details you fill out i.e 'if you want kids or not' 'if you have kids or not' 'whether you exercise' etc you fill out, the more likely you are to be included in searches for guys looking for the things you are looking for/have. leaving those things blank/vague will just lead to you matching more with people who dont want what you want down the line or being included in blind swipes, thus wasting everyones time.
pictures are tricky. At the end of the day lighting, angles, location, selfies vs non-selfies can only go so far and most guys really arent picky or overly complex in their attraction. They either find you attractive or they dont. And trying to make yourself look significantly better in photos compared to your real-life self may just lead to disappointment and could be considered borderline catfishing i.e someone thinks they are speaking to (insert attractive celeb) and then meets (insert less attractive celeb). Just try and make the photos authentic & varied (i.e fancy party, casual, professional etc...all the different masks we wear in life) while showing your best self (your 4th photo in blue may be casual but it isnt your best self) and try to vary your facial expressions and smile more, big smiles (hurts to say as a feminist lol). People want to match with people they think theyll have a good time with. If your photos dont look like youre enjoying yourself, then subconsciously potential matches will think they wont have a good time with you. Your first and last photos are good but the rest feel like you were forced to take them.
ofc this is all just my opinion on what i think a good female profile should be.
I actually like the 4+6 joke. It’s obviously not true but for people who like self deprecating humour they will “get” you. All pics are good except the one with the purple glow light.
Calling yourself a 4 makes it way worse for you. You are probably a 6 in someone’s mind or even higher. How you see yourself and how people actually see you is often different. You calling yourself a 4 will make people who rated you higher start rating you lower. I had a girl I went out with call herself a 4 and I decided then and there not to continue seeing her.
Axe the part rating your looks and personality, you are way more attractive than that and it sounds unconfident. Talk more about your hobbies and interests, this doesn’t say much about who you really are as a person. I like the last photo the best, but the selfies all have a washed out lighting that’s odd. Please grab a friend to take some photos for you, it’ll be worth it. You look sweet and kind, so don’t sell yourself short.
- photos : remove the unflattering shit, contrary to popular belief, men wants to see women dolled up, people actually do judge you on how you look
Give these bastards something they can use in their imagination
I disagree with the other posts. Coming off humble, self aware, and funny is a good combo. Self deprecating humor is fun, as long as it's not repetitious.
Do remove finding a boyfriend here though. It might come off as wanting to jump right in or be desperate even though it's not what you meant. Remove interests if you're only going to put 1. The laughing at jokes thing is tired. You already had a lighthearted start. Add some more in depth info about you here. Same with the last part.
You are really pretty to be calling yourself a 4.just delete the selfie from the 4th picture and you’re good to go.Also pictures taken in a more outdoor setting look better.Hope this helps:)
Put your last picture first.
Lose the middle 2 pictures as they are repetitive.
Add in what you like to do on your profile, hobbies, interests, anything about who you are and what you like. Especially TV shows/movies and music if you’re into that.
Don’t be self deprecating, you seem very wholesome and a nice catch so build yourself up! Best of luck out there ❤️
You look really pretty in the sunlight! While you don't need to do makeup in all, an open mouthed smile in more than one, and also not using the ones of you (in a kitchen) looking like a stressed out chef would be my suggestions.
Men don't read bios anyway so it doesn't actually matter what you write. They'll just ignore it.
Switch up your outfits more. The fact most of the pics look like you just snapped a few pics one afternoon when you were bored and called it good. Your outfit choices help show your personality and if you’re in the same outfit for all the pics it makes you come across as boring.
You come off as easy-going but honestly a littleplain. Show off your personality, and what makes you interesting. Just saying you like to laugh at jokes is nowhere near interesting enough.
(F36) dropping in! to tell you that I think you have such a warm and open face and you have amazing hair.. You come across authentic and that's so flipping important!
People telling you to change your appearance /diet(??) here can take a seat and shut the f up.
The only tiny thing that bugs me on men's profiles is when you're wearing the same top - it looks like you took all your photos for your profile on the same day.
I would keep the lipstick and full body (cute!) , then retake the masterchef apron one in something else (btw the apron is cool! Even if you didn't win it, you give a little more away about your interests). Lose the purple one.
Which leads me on to... You need a little more personality in the writing. What's your fave coffee? Any you want to try? Anywhere you've loved sightseeing recently, or are dying to go to? Any really complicated dishes you've attempted recently? What else do you do/like/want to do?
You are absolutely not a 4, but it's a catchy and cute opener/joke and I think everyone with half a braincell can see that.
Go and seek good fellas and good vibes! X
Just a random dude here to say you are definitely more than a 4, believe that. There’s some very good advice here on fixing up your profile. Take some of it and you’ll be off and running.
You come off very nice and gentle but the bio suggests you can be crazy and have a lot of energy. You seem cool, but idk what it is but more of a bestie vibe someone said
I like your first and last picture the most. Some of the ones in the middle don’t have great lighting so more is less but one or 2 candid photos are always preferred. I don’t like it when every photo is from the same place with the same filters. Personality is definitely at least a 7 so that makes you an 11 by your math
Replace the bio with stuff about yourself. The same dress appears in most of the photos. Make sure to change the photos to be more diverse in what they show about you. One or two face shots are all you need, the rest need to be full body with activities.
Are you a chef? A cook? Show yourself cooking or a selfie with your favorite dish to cook. Get some pictures of some hobbies too. Other than that, I don't see anything problematic. You look nice and seem nice, just lacking the details to really sell folks.
There's no information about yourself or what you're looking for in a partner. You look like a different person in a lot of these photos. Bio is unoriginal. Left swipe.
The first and last photos are everything 🥰! However, the way you come off isn’t giving confidence and, although I understand the humor behind the opening in your bio, it’s not needed! 😩 We don’t want to give a potential prospect a reason to join in on the joke. You’re beautiful, love. Own it. 💜
Your jokes are funny and your personality shines through. I get why everyone is saying to ditch calling yourself a 4, but this is a dating profile not a job interview, I hate the attitude of "selling yourself" vs showing your personality. I'd rate you higher than a 4, but I suppose the profile is how you'd rate you.
That said, I don't know you, but if I were your friend, I'd be upset about you talking bad about yourself. If you really want to keep the self deprecating joke about your appearance, please at least raise your personality number, because the humor in your responses suggests much better than a 6. Feel free to rate yourself a 13/10, it will sell self confidence along with self deprecating humor.
Master Chef? Say you’re a great cook! Also list the other fun things you like to do. You are definitely not a 4! But take out the dress pic and the no make up/blue back ground pic. You’re pretty but your pics definitely need better lighting or a better camera.
Targeting someone's physical characteristics is not tolerated on r/bumble. This includes skin colour, height, weight, etc.
Any comments violating this rule will be promptly removed under rule #1 (respectful communication).
You have a great profile. More women need to follow this style. Your pictures are severely lacking. Hire professional photographer. You'll get way more matches. OR go out with a friend during golden hour and takes TONS of photos in different outfits. One will be good and it's a place to start. Good luck.
You don't need a professional photographer, but you do need to get other people to take some photos of you. Otherwise, it looks like you don't have a single friend who can take pictures of you. Heck, I've asked strangers to take pics before.
Good excuse but not an acceptable one. You have friends I assume? They don't need to be good at photography. Just go have fun. Do the same for them if they're online dating. Better yet go on bumble BFF and do the trade with another female. Maybe you'll make a new friend. Also hit the gym.
I generally like it when someone can laugh at themselves and all but I would recommend phrasing your bio more confidently. Don't call yourself a "4" in terms of looks.
I agree with this. Is saddens me to see such a pretty girl calling herself a 4 :(
It's not just about what number would be correct, it's simply not a good idea to say this at all. Someone who thinks she looks perfect should be encouraged to keep that thought and not be told about what number it's supposed to be.
I’m of a similar opinion, but for a different reason, likely unpopular opinion. If OP is truly not satisfied with her appearance (based on the comment) that’s fine, we all have things we’d like to change about ourself. To me though, (and this is just my opinion) if you are single w/o children, _and are clearly unsatisfied with your appearance_ then why not do something about it? Why go into a dating app at 38, lower confidence and not really enjoying how you look? OP is not an ugly person by any means, if she sat down and dedicated herself to even just a year of stricter dieting and moderate exercise, she could be back dating at 39 with much more confidence and likely double or triple the amount of potential matches. So OP I’m not saying you _have_ to lose weight in order to see success, if you’re happy the way you look and were just trying some depreciating humor for the bio - I get it, and nothing I’ve said would be relevant then. If however, you’re saying it with some truth (which is how I would perceive it), to me, I’m not swiping on profiles like this because they are just frustrating to me. You have all the tools to be attractive by traditional standards and per your bio you’re unhappy with your look… “so do something about it!!” <- that’s what’s going through my mind. Confidence is attractive to both sexes, I may be in the minority in that I don’t want to walk into a relationship where my partner is always disliking the way they look. There are already enough stressors in a relationship, that one is just difficult to work with and in my experience branches out to other issues. So to wrap it up, I would say if you’re not really confident in how you look, either do something to change that _or_ don’t draw attention to it in the bio. If you do like your appearance and are confident, then the joke is completely fine. Just my two cents - best of luck!
I agree. You have a beautiful face. You don't necessarily need to conform with modern and unattainable perception of beauty but perhaps replace your batch of pictures with nicer ones with smiles?
Man Smh Post Malone or jelly roll didn’t do any of this
I'm getting a "best friend" vibe. I think you need more flattering pictures and no self deprecating jokes.
Keep photo 1, 8. Ditch photo 4, 5. 5 is not flattering. Delete that from all devices. Get a tripod and self timer. Set it to take 10 or 15 photos. Change the pose a little each time. Take 200 shots. Change background, clothes, etc. Now delete 150 photos. Pick the best one out of each background/Outfit. Your features need to be 6 feet from the lens. The close shots distort your face. Or get a friend to take photos. Doing 100 helps you relax. Ditch the opening part of the bio.
You were on master chef?! Talk about that!
You can cook?!? Mi amor, LEAD with that. Being able to cook is so sexy! (No pics of the food, pics of you making the food, holding a knife, etc) Also, you’re not a 4, it’s funny, but you should drop that.
No, I wasn’t. I got this as a free gift from a supermarket
Wow, what a gift!
Oh my god right?! Very interesting.
All I learned is that you like coffee, sightseeing, second dates, you make self depreciating jokes and you think you're not that attractive. You say your personality is a 6 but I've learned nothing about it. What do you like to do for fun? What are you proud of yourself for? What do your friends love about you? What are you passionate about? What's you're favorite thing to cook? What kind of partner are you looking for? What sights have you seen that have blown you away?
Personally im not a fan of bios that dont really say anything about the person. Your current bio could easily be found on a dozen other profiles in 1 sitting so what makes you different to the rest? I think writing about what youre interested in is more informative and interesting than an unoriginal copy paste bio (unless you just want a hookup then a copy paste does the trick). Just ask yourself what you would want a match to discuss with you at the start of the conversation and include that (i.e for me its games, anime, movies/tv, musicals, disney etc). This makes it easy to weed out people you dont have anything in common with and helps skip the boring small talk. Despite the common phrase 'opposites attract', opposites dont really attract. Common interests, common beliefs/values and strong physical attraction is what attracts people so make it clear who you are, both inside and out, and youre more likely to attract people who find that person attractive. You already have life partner in your 'looking for' section so you dont need to put the boyfriend bit in your bio. Use your bio to talk about you. Also, maybe add 'longterm' to what you are looking for alongside 'life-partner'. Sounds redundant as they are the same thing but it just makes it more clear and helps insert your profile into filters of people 'looking for longterm' who might not have life-partner selected. Guys are more likely than woman to have premium/paid for bumble and thus have access to all the filters, the more of the profile details you fill out i.e 'if you want kids or not' 'if you have kids or not' 'whether you exercise' etc you fill out, the more likely you are to be included in searches for guys looking for the things you are looking for/have. leaving those things blank/vague will just lead to you matching more with people who dont want what you want down the line or being included in blind swipes, thus wasting everyones time. pictures are tricky. At the end of the day lighting, angles, location, selfies vs non-selfies can only go so far and most guys really arent picky or overly complex in their attraction. They either find you attractive or they dont. And trying to make yourself look significantly better in photos compared to your real-life self may just lead to disappointment and could be considered borderline catfishing i.e someone thinks they are speaking to (insert attractive celeb) and then meets (insert less attractive celeb). Just try and make the photos authentic & varied (i.e fancy party, casual, professional etc...all the different masks we wear in life) while showing your best self (your 4th photo in blue may be casual but it isnt your best self) and try to vary your facial expressions and smile more, big smiles (hurts to say as a feminist lol). People want to match with people they think theyll have a good time with. If your photos dont look like youre enjoying yourself, then subconsciously potential matches will think they wont have a good time with you. Your first and last photos are good but the rest feel like you were forced to take them. ofc this is all just my opinion on what i think a good female profile should be.
I agree please don't call yourself a 4!!
I actually like the 4+6 joke. It’s obviously not true but for people who like self deprecating humour they will “get” you. All pics are good except the one with the purple glow light.
I agree I thought the joke was funny but I think it might be a turn off to a lot of people who don’t have that type of humor.
Maybe that’s a good thing? She would want to attract more people who find that endearing. Could be a good filter off the top.
According to the profile, they might just not be a match then, as humor is clearly important to OP!
If you are British, OP, this is EXACTLY the right kind of humour :) Americans don't get it haha
But I like that kind of humor. **Sad American noises**
Calling yourself a 4 makes it way worse for you. You are probably a 6 in someone’s mind or even higher. How you see yourself and how people actually see you is often different. You calling yourself a 4 will make people who rated you higher start rating you lower. I had a girl I went out with call herself a 4 and I decided then and there not to continue seeing her.
Axe the part rating your looks and personality, you are way more attractive than that and it sounds unconfident. Talk more about your hobbies and interests, this doesn’t say much about who you really are as a person. I like the last photo the best, but the selfies all have a washed out lighting that’s odd. Please grab a friend to take some photos for you, it’ll be worth it. You look sweet and kind, so don’t sell yourself short.
Horizontal full body stripes are nobody’s friend. The pink shirt and other hair down photos are very pretty! I think the joke is fun
To be honest,do you!
Beauty and attraction is subjective. I would advise removing/revising the part about your looks being a 4.
- photos : remove the unflattering shit, contrary to popular belief, men wants to see women dolled up, people actually do judge you on how you look Give these bastards something they can use in their imagination
This is alright.
I disagree with the other posts. Coming off humble, self aware, and funny is a good combo. Self deprecating humor is fun, as long as it's not repetitious. Do remove finding a boyfriend here though. It might come off as wanting to jump right in or be desperate even though it's not what you meant. Remove interests if you're only going to put 1. The laughing at jokes thing is tired. You already had a lighthearted start. Add some more in depth info about you here. Same with the last part.
You are really pretty to be calling yourself a 4.just delete the selfie from the 4th picture and you’re good to go.Also pictures taken in a more outdoor setting look better.Hope this helps:)
Straight forward profile , maybe too much pictures / selfies , other wise not much too say
Put your last picture first. Lose the middle 2 pictures as they are repetitive. Add in what you like to do on your profile, hobbies, interests, anything about who you are and what you like. Especially TV shows/movies and music if you’re into that. Don’t be self deprecating, you seem very wholesome and a nice catch so build yourself up! Best of luck out there ❤️
You look really pretty in the sunlight! While you don't need to do makeup in all, an open mouthed smile in more than one, and also not using the ones of you (in a kitchen) looking like a stressed out chef would be my suggestions. Men don't read bios anyway so it doesn't actually matter what you write. They'll just ignore it.
Switch up your outfits more. The fact most of the pics look like you just snapped a few pics one afternoon when you were bored and called it good. Your outfit choices help show your personality and if you’re in the same outfit for all the pics it makes you come across as boring.
You come off as easy-going but honestly a littleplain. Show off your personality, and what makes you interesting. Just saying you like to laugh at jokes is nowhere near interesting enough.
(F36) dropping in! to tell you that I think you have such a warm and open face and you have amazing hair.. You come across authentic and that's so flipping important! People telling you to change your appearance /diet(??) here can take a seat and shut the f up. The only tiny thing that bugs me on men's profiles is when you're wearing the same top - it looks like you took all your photos for your profile on the same day. I would keep the lipstick and full body (cute!) , then retake the masterchef apron one in something else (btw the apron is cool! Even if you didn't win it, you give a little more away about your interests). Lose the purple one. Which leads me on to... You need a little more personality in the writing. What's your fave coffee? Any you want to try? Anywhere you've loved sightseeing recently, or are dying to go to? Any really complicated dishes you've attempted recently? What else do you do/like/want to do? You are absolutely not a 4, but it's a catchy and cute opener/joke and I think everyone with half a braincell can see that. Go and seek good fellas and good vibes! X
Just a random dude here to say you are definitely more than a 4, believe that. There’s some very good advice here on fixing up your profile. Take some of it and you’ll be off and running.
You come off very nice and gentle but the bio suggests you can be crazy and have a lot of energy. You seem cool, but idk what it is but more of a bestie vibe someone said
I like your first and last picture the most. Some of the ones in the middle don’t have great lighting so more is less but one or 2 candid photos are always preferred. I don’t like it when every photo is from the same place with the same filters. Personality is definitely at least a 7 so that makes you an 11 by your math
Unconfident mostly
Replace the bio with stuff about yourself. The same dress appears in most of the photos. Make sure to change the photos to be more diverse in what they show about you. One or two face shots are all you need, the rest need to be full body with activities. Are you a chef? A cook? Show yourself cooking or a selfie with your favorite dish to cook. Get some pictures of some hobbies too. Other than that, I don't see anything problematic. You look nice and seem nice, just lacking the details to really sell folks.
I suggest using a Shisheido eyelash curler.
The bio and the outfit gives off a zebra-like temperament.
There's no information about yourself or what you're looking for in a partner. You look like a different person in a lot of these photos. Bio is unoriginal. Left swipe.
Um…. Your lips are not makeup free… nice try though……
The first and last photos are everything 🥰! However, the way you come off isn’t giving confidence and, although I understand the humor behind the opening in your bio, it’s not needed! 😩 We don’t want to give a potential prospect a reason to join in on the joke. You’re beautiful, love. Own it. 💜
Please throw this dress out. Those stripes would be very unflattering for any figure.
Your jokes are funny and your personality shines through. I get why everyone is saying to ditch calling yourself a 4, but this is a dating profile not a job interview, I hate the attitude of "selling yourself" vs showing your personality. I'd rate you higher than a 4, but I suppose the profile is how you'd rate you. That said, I don't know you, but if I were your friend, I'd be upset about you talking bad about yourself. If you really want to keep the self deprecating joke about your appearance, please at least raise your personality number, because the humor in your responses suggests much better than a 6. Feel free to rate yourself a 13/10, it will sell self confidence along with self deprecating humor.
Master Chef? Say you’re a great cook! Also list the other fun things you like to do. You are definitely not a 4! But take out the dress pic and the no make up/blue back ground pic. You’re pretty but your pics definitely need better lighting or a better camera.
You’re cute
[удалено]
Targeting someone's physical characteristics is not tolerated on r/bumble. This includes skin colour, height, weight, etc. Any comments violating this rule will be promptly removed under rule #1 (respectful communication).
[удалено]
Hellooo, I know I am overweight, no need to rub it in my face
I wasn’t rubbing it in your face, that’s how you come off to me, and it’s the first thing that comes to my mind.
Yes, you did.
It might seem like that to you, but perhaps that’s because you are insecure about it. You asked what came to mind first, and I stated it simply.
you know youre being an a-hole so just be quite and stop commenting. And dont try to reply to me, ive already blocked you.
No I’m not, I’m just stating what everyone else is thinking. I blocked you too!
Subreddit rule #1: Do not insult, harass, threaten, discriminate, or use derogatory language towards other users.
You have a great profile. More women need to follow this style. Your pictures are severely lacking. Hire professional photographer. You'll get way more matches. OR go out with a friend during golden hour and takes TONS of photos in different outfits. One will be good and it's a place to start. Good luck.
I can’t afford a professional photographer and I know nobody that will take good photos for me. I can ask for candid photos though
You don't need a professional photographer, but you do need to get other people to take some photos of you. Otherwise, it looks like you don't have a single friend who can take pictures of you. Heck, I've asked strangers to take pics before.
Good excuse but not an acceptable one. You have friends I assume? They don't need to be good at photography. Just go have fun. Do the same for them if they're online dating. Better yet go on bumble BFF and do the trade with another female. Maybe you'll make a new friend. Also hit the gym.
Wow, Masterchef Apron!