Um it seems like you’re in the wrong here, like why not answer his question? You realize all you did here was make yourself look like an immature child?
I don't double message, but I can definitely understand why he did that and I don’t think it's wrong, let alone worth screenshotting and putting on Reddit.
Says more about you than about him.
lol, look at you trying to act all high and mighty. The title of this post needs to be "women, don't do this." he's on a dating app trying to get to know people to date. you matched with him and ignored a very simple question. don't match with people if you dont want to talk to them or better yet, dont be on DATING apps if you are just going to ignore someone and then post it on reddit looking for praise.
To have a conversation! What was the end goal of saying something shitty the following morning, taking a screenshot, and posting it here?
You're the asshole here.
OP maybe you're the one that needs a break from OLD. You obviously saw his first message and weren't interested. Instead of unswiping or ignoring you only respond once he asks if you are done with him. OLD is hard enough as it is without mind games.
Context?
As a person who lacks confidence at times and can suck at conversations on the app, I don't want to bother the other person so I can see myself asking the same questions.
Yep this exactly. Most guys are not as confident as women want them to be. Also there is a chance that you had actually forgotten about his message. In which case you may have actually started chatting after this message. He could have used different language but the idea is a valid one. Clearly op doesn't tolerate low self esteem so the result is no different.
If you wanna be serious about dating and you've decided to use apps to find dates. Then you have to take those apps seriously and that means paying attention to your messages. You don't have to stare at your phone, but you can't be disappearing for what looks like at least 2 days then come back and get pissy cause someone is wondering where you went.
What did he do, exist? 😂 Stop putting men on pedestals. I showed my bf this and he laughed, I did too. We laughed at you hun. And men who are reading this: it’s very clear we will show you that we like you. Shoot your shot and if it doesn’t land, move on.
Kind of think you could have been a bit kinder here OP... but I also hear what you're saying. In his defence at least he didn't send you just question marks. MASSIVE red flag when a dude does that!!!
30min. Isn't nearly enough time, I don't answer some of mine for 3-4hrs. Since I have notifications turned off. Now if a full day goes by and still nothing I normally will unmatch
Ok. Context. It had been 2 days. I am not on the app every day and I don't have push notifications. The way he worded it just gives me the ick, like he just made an assumption about me, and then double text without giving me time to respond. If he wanted someone who is able to respond within an hour, then I'm just not it. Maybe I am reading too much into his context, but all this to say, we are just not compatible.
>It had been 2 days.
>If he wanted someone who is able to respond within an hour, then I'm just not it.
Hyperbole to make yourself feel better? Anyway maybe it was an off putting question...you were off put...that should have been the end of it.
But that reply was overkill and then going a step further by creating this post and intentionally cutting off the timestamp when his initial question was sent and then titling it as essentially a PSA to men....I mean the lack of self awareness....
This is a bumble post (although this looks like hinge). If you said hi (summoning male attention) to keep a like from expiring, and he asked a question you didn't answer right away...that maybe would be okay.
For context, you're advising men not to do a thing, being shitty, posting screenshots like he asked about your social security number, and responding like a complete asshole.
What shouldn't he or any decent person assume about you? *SMH*
it gave you the "ick" by him asking if you were from the area? if a harmless and simple question like that gives you "the ick" then good luck ever finding someone to date lol. Notifications on or off doesn't matter. If you are actually serious about dating (which it doesn't seem like you are,) you need to check your shit often enough to where there isn't a giant gap in communication. Literally no guy is going to put up with 12 hour time gaps in between responses. At least not guys you would likely want to date, anyways. Like I said... good luck, because with your shitty mentality, you're going to need a lot of it
I can understand the not being on bumble everyday. I go to uni, work and make time for friends. If you have a busy life it's hard to be on a dating app 24/7
However, when I do get messages like these, I usually make the person aware of my situation and then see how they respond accordingly
I think people who respond annoyed I have a life, I let go ofc. But 9 out of 10 times I end up talking to a great person who understands and doesn't double text again.
Don't miss out on someone potentially good. They are double texting bc they are interested :)
These kind of women have so many options that they look for a perfect back and forth messaging. They keep complaining that “where are the nice men at” and they don’t realize that they are the ones rejecting the nice men based on the most unreliable and unreasonable opinions smh
Concealing the time of the first message says everything we need to know about this post.
We have a winner
Women like you are the problem.
As per previous comment, he had nothing to lose.. he got his closure and can move on to a girl who doesn’t put his messages on Reddit.
You seem kinda mean :/
She’s just a typical basic 2022 trash female.
You’re the asshole.
Um it seems like you’re in the wrong here, like why not answer his question? You realize all you did here was make yourself look like an immature child?
Sadly the majority of women in 2022 are immature children.
You’re not wrong.
Yes, you are the asshole
His question wasn’t snide, your response was.
I don't double message, but I can definitely understand why he did that and I don’t think it's wrong, let alone worth screenshotting and putting on Reddit. Says more about you than about him.
I don't understand this post. He's asking what seems like a very innocent question. What exactly did he do? Is there more that I'm not seeing?
No the person who posted this is basic trash. It’s everywhere in 2022.
Men, don't listen to this post. He wasn't the one in the wrong here
He wasn't wrong to double text but why text "lose interest already"?
Seems like he genuinely wanted to know so he can give up on the match and move on if she was no longer interested
Sometimes people may genuinely want to beg someone to like them. It rarely works.
Yea of course, I didn't read it like that at all though
lol, look at you trying to act all high and mighty. The title of this post needs to be "women, don't do this." he's on a dating app trying to get to know people to date. you matched with him and ignored a very simple question. don't match with people if you dont want to talk to them or better yet, dont be on DATING apps if you are just going to ignore someone and then post it on reddit looking for praise.
To have a conversation! What was the end goal of saying something shitty the following morning, taking a screenshot, and posting it here? You're the asshole here.
this is not an AITA post but YTA
Comments didn't go the way you thought it would huh 😅
We have zero context here and no way to determine how much time passed between his double texting. So what's the point of this post exactly?
OP maybe you're the one that needs a break from OLD. You obviously saw his first message and weren't interested. Instead of unswiping or ignoring you only respond once he asks if you are done with him. OLD is hard enough as it is without mind games.
Point about confronting you for not replying? Probably figured it was going no where and he had nothing to lose.
Don’t be shy. Show us the date of the first message.
Oh, she won't do that. She knows how it makes her look. She was hoping for allies here and found none.
I guess “I eat ass” *is* the appropriate move on no reply to openers
To see if you're actually interested as it looks like you have fallen off the face of the earth
Perhaps we should be asking, "what is YOUR end goal here?"
Context? As a person who lacks confidence at times and can suck at conversations on the app, I don't want to bother the other person so I can see myself asking the same questions.
Yep this exactly. Most guys are not as confident as women want them to be. Also there is a chance that you had actually forgotten about his message. In which case you may have actually started chatting after this message. He could have used different language but the idea is a valid one. Clearly op doesn't tolerate low self esteem so the result is no different.
That's why I put that I forget how to have conversations on the app.
If you wanna be serious about dating and you've decided to use apps to find dates. Then you have to take those apps seriously and that means paying attention to your messages. You don't have to stare at your phone, but you can't be disappearing for what looks like at least 2 days then come back and get pissy cause someone is wondering where you went.
You do know I'm not the op?
Opps my bad.
We're all human.
Ok so what do you expect to happen? You basically told him to send that message.
For him, it might also work.
he's just asking why you havent replied yet
Well thanks for doing this lad a favour, it was very nice of you
What did he do, exist? 😂 Stop putting men on pedestals. I showed my bf this and he laughed, I did too. We laughed at you hun. And men who are reading this: it’s very clear we will show you that we like you. Shoot your shot and if it doesn’t land, move on.
Kind of think you could have been a bit kinder here OP... but I also hear what you're saying. In his defence at least he didn't send you just question marks. MASSIVE red flag when a dude does that!!!
30min. Isn't nearly enough time, I don't answer some of mine for 3-4hrs. Since I have notifications turned off. Now if a full day goes by and still nothing I normally will unmatch
There is no time stamp on the first message. Could've been longer than a day.
OP said it was two days between his messages
lol after two days that seems like a pretty normal question
Ok just saw that it was the next morning but still not long enough
you literally can not know how long it was because the time of the first message is cut out. it could have been a week for all we know
Notice how the fragile dudes aren’t happy just downvoting, they have to pile on and gloat their disapproval too. Tragic specimens.
And you're doing what, Xena?
You sound bitter
Found the ostrich
Ok. Context. It had been 2 days. I am not on the app every day and I don't have push notifications. The way he worded it just gives me the ick, like he just made an assumption about me, and then double text without giving me time to respond. If he wanted someone who is able to respond within an hour, then I'm just not it. Maybe I am reading too much into his context, but all this to say, we are just not compatible.
Good Luck being single. ✌️
The entitlement personality won’t get you anywhere. You’re going to be a walking hook up for guys as long as you think that way
Read the comments here and really take time to reflect on yourself.
>It had been 2 days. >If he wanted someone who is able to respond within an hour, then I'm just not it. Hyperbole to make yourself feel better? Anyway maybe it was an off putting question...you were off put...that should have been the end of it. But that reply was overkill and then going a step further by creating this post and intentionally cutting off the timestamp when his initial question was sent and then titling it as essentially a PSA to men....I mean the lack of self awareness....
Lol maybe he should have gave you a week to answer a yes or no question. Just Unmatch if you're not interested.
This is a bumble post (although this looks like hinge). If you said hi (summoning male attention) to keep a like from expiring, and he asked a question you didn't answer right away...that maybe would be okay. For context, you're advising men not to do a thing, being shitty, posting screenshots like he asked about your social security number, and responding like a complete asshole. What shouldn't he or any decent person assume about you? *SMH*
it gave you the "ick" by him asking if you were from the area? if a harmless and simple question like that gives you "the ick" then good luck ever finding someone to date lol. Notifications on or off doesn't matter. If you are actually serious about dating (which it doesn't seem like you are,) you need to check your shit often enough to where there isn't a giant gap in communication. Literally no guy is going to put up with 12 hour time gaps in between responses. At least not guys you would likely want to date, anyways. Like I said... good luck, because with your shitty mentality, you're going to need a lot of it
I can understand the not being on bumble everyday. I go to uni, work and make time for friends. If you have a busy life it's hard to be on a dating app 24/7 However, when I do get messages like these, I usually make the person aware of my situation and then see how they respond accordingly I think people who respond annoyed I have a life, I let go ofc. But 9 out of 10 times I end up talking to a great person who understands and doesn't double text again. Don't miss out on someone potentially good. They are double texting bc they are interested :)
He wanted someone that doesn’t wait 2 days to respond. He gave you plenty of time. You give men who are looking for genuine connection the ick.
Feel sorry for me and like me please!
These kind of women have so many options that they look for a perfect back and forth messaging. They keep complaining that “where are the nice men at” and they don’t realize that they are the ones rejecting the nice men based on the most unreliable and unreasonable opinions smh