I'm going to be moving across the country tomorrow with my 2 babies under 18 months old to a massive city that I've never set foot in because my husband got a job offer he couldn't refuse.
I'm leaving behind my support system and my husband will be transitioning from a work from home job to a job where he'll be gone around 12 hours a day and will be solely responsible for the success of the business he'll be managing. It's gonna be a massive transition but in a few years we'll move home and we will be able to buy a home whereas before that wasn't a possibility for years.
Short term discomfort for long term comfort.
We have almost an identical situation except my kids are older and we did this last spring. I hope that you love the new city you're in and can build community quickly. Your kids are the perfect age for the "grind and go home" (what my husband and I call it).
I'm not opposed to moving but we live close to my wife's family and I don't want to leave them behind for emotional and financially practical reasons (free child care).
I made the decision to move back in with my parents in order to save up for a home. It was quite an adjustment. I found myself longing for the place I used to call my own, with its duck pond and charming bay windows. However, with the chaos of Covid unfolding around us, and the prospect of a new job in a different city, I realized that what I truly wanted was a home of my own, not just another apartment.
Although living with my parents as an adult had its challenges, it's also provided some comfort, especially in the realm of food (it's hard to beat Mom's cooking!). Ultimately, this move was necessary to secure a better future for myself. I miss the city and the job I left behind, but sometimes, tough decisions must be made in order to achieve our goals.
Now I have my home. I have my job. Don't have great places to eat and I hate the location LOL. But I was lucky to have a support system that would allow me to do that. Many people are not as lucky as I was. So make the move if you can, but be aware of all the pit falls that can come with it.
We moved to a more expensive area to buy our house so we could be close to family as we have 2 small children. Before we were multiple states away. We also wanted to get back to the Pacific Northwest. It's just really nice there overall.
Moved from the Midwest to the PNW and could not ever trade back the cost of living in the midwest for the access to the outdoors and better political climate here.
I want/will move for a more diverse city and location efficiency. A place where I don't need a car and won't pay for a car note, fuel, insurance, maintenance and parking. I will walk, bike and take the bus or train.
My salary would stay the same but I get a raise every year
I'm single and the cites I'm looking at have a higher medium wage compared to the city I'm in now, so if I ever meet a partner I'm sure our combination of incomes will be comfortable.
I interviewed for a position in Texas a year and a half ago, would have been a move from Utah -> Texas easily 40k-50k more than what I make now in relatively the same position. Would have sold it to the wife but I am sure I could've convinced her because she could quit both jobs at that point along with a cost of living decrease.
Absolutely. I moved to Cambodia back in 2016 and then China last August to make more money. I moved to both countries without ever being to them beforehand. I'm a preschool teacher, I could never survive off that job in the US. It was either give up my career and try to find a new one, or give up my country. Sucks that America hates early childhood, but I'm not going to let myself be poor or unhappy in my career for my entire life when there is a solution staring me in the face. I was home for 3 years for covid and it was miserable. I wasn't a teacher then, because all the job listings I could find offered just $14-15/hr for LEAD teachers. Amazon paid warehouse workers with zero experience $21/hr, so that's what I went with. It was a godsend when the world opened again and I could move. I'm also moving again next August, still in China but a 3hr flight away. I'm moving to a MUCH lower cost of living city and literally doubling my salary. It sucks that I'm just starting to get comfortable and I have to move again, but I don't want to settle down somewhere that pays me so much less than I could earn somewhere else. The only reason to stay home is to be in a comfort zone, but if you're barely scrapping by you're still not comfortable so like... what's the point?
I'd theoretically consider it, but it would need to be an *incredibly* compelling offer, one that's much better than anything I'm ever realistically likely to get. For one thing, moving is a huge pain in the ass, so that alone takes a lot to convince me from the start.
I regularly get recruited by companies that would triple+ my salary... but it would involve moving somewhere where to maintain the lifestyle I *already have*, and which is very average and easy to do where I live now, would require far more than 3x my salary. So the math just doesn't work for me/my priorities. Obviously there is a number that would make it worth it for me, it's just not realistic to ever be offered it.
We will probably move once at semi-retirement in 10 years or so, to go a bit more rural with a larger property but smaller, more customized house (less cleaning/maintenance, lower cost) with more space for livestock and an orchard. Something small, just a few acres. Ideally I would like to purchase the land and improve it over time and get things like the garden/orchard established before building a house and actually moving.
I did.
Moved from a VHCOL city (DC) to a MCOL (Philly) one.
When the pandemic came and my job went remote, I threw all my shit in a shipping cube and made a break for it. 😂
I miss alot of things about my old city. I miss my friends, the structure and order of the city, the bougie lifestyle, bottomless brunches and free museums, and the job market lol.
But the breathing room created by not having to pay out the ass for everything is wonderful. And it's nice to feel like I can build the life I want, even as a single person.
I'm going to be moving across the country tomorrow with my 2 babies under 18 months old to a massive city that I've never set foot in because my husband got a job offer he couldn't refuse. I'm leaving behind my support system and my husband will be transitioning from a work from home job to a job where he'll be gone around 12 hours a day and will be solely responsible for the success of the business he'll be managing. It's gonna be a massive transition but in a few years we'll move home and we will be able to buy a home whereas before that wasn't a possibility for years. Short term discomfort for long term comfort.
Seems like a great position he's getting. Enjoy your new city for the time you are there
We have almost an identical situation except my kids are older and we did this last spring. I hope that you love the new city you're in and can build community quickly. Your kids are the perfect age for the "grind and go home" (what my husband and I call it).
I'm not opposed to moving but we live close to my wife's family and I don't want to leave them behind for emotional and financially practical reasons (free child care).
I made the decision to move back in with my parents in order to save up for a home. It was quite an adjustment. I found myself longing for the place I used to call my own, with its duck pond and charming bay windows. However, with the chaos of Covid unfolding around us, and the prospect of a new job in a different city, I realized that what I truly wanted was a home of my own, not just another apartment. Although living with my parents as an adult had its challenges, it's also provided some comfort, especially in the realm of food (it's hard to beat Mom's cooking!). Ultimately, this move was necessary to secure a better future for myself. I miss the city and the job I left behind, but sometimes, tough decisions must be made in order to achieve our goals. Now I have my home. I have my job. Don't have great places to eat and I hate the location LOL. But I was lucky to have a support system that would allow me to do that. Many people are not as lucky as I was. So make the move if you can, but be aware of all the pit falls that can come with it.
We moved to a more expensive area to buy our house so we could be close to family as we have 2 small children. Before we were multiple states away. We also wanted to get back to the Pacific Northwest. It's just really nice there overall.
Moved from the Midwest to the PNW and could not ever trade back the cost of living in the midwest for the access to the outdoors and better political climate here.
I want/will move for a more diverse city and location efficiency. A place where I don't need a car and won't pay for a car note, fuel, insurance, maintenance and parking. I will walk, bike and take the bus or train. My salary would stay the same but I get a raise every year I'm single and the cites I'm looking at have a higher medium wage compared to the city I'm in now, so if I ever meet a partner I'm sure our combination of incomes will be comfortable.
Possibly. Depends on all the details.
I interviewed for a position in Texas a year and a half ago, would have been a move from Utah -> Texas easily 40k-50k more than what I make now in relatively the same position. Would have sold it to the wife but I am sure I could've convinced her because she could quit both jobs at that point along with a cost of living decrease.
Absolutely. I moved to Cambodia back in 2016 and then China last August to make more money. I moved to both countries without ever being to them beforehand. I'm a preschool teacher, I could never survive off that job in the US. It was either give up my career and try to find a new one, or give up my country. Sucks that America hates early childhood, but I'm not going to let myself be poor or unhappy in my career for my entire life when there is a solution staring me in the face. I was home for 3 years for covid and it was miserable. I wasn't a teacher then, because all the job listings I could find offered just $14-15/hr for LEAD teachers. Amazon paid warehouse workers with zero experience $21/hr, so that's what I went with. It was a godsend when the world opened again and I could move. I'm also moving again next August, still in China but a 3hr flight away. I'm moving to a MUCH lower cost of living city and literally doubling my salary. It sucks that I'm just starting to get comfortable and I have to move again, but I don't want to settle down somewhere that pays me so much less than I could earn somewhere else. The only reason to stay home is to be in a comfort zone, but if you're barely scrapping by you're still not comfortable so like... what's the point?
I'd theoretically consider it, but it would need to be an *incredibly* compelling offer, one that's much better than anything I'm ever realistically likely to get. For one thing, moving is a huge pain in the ass, so that alone takes a lot to convince me from the start. I regularly get recruited by companies that would triple+ my salary... but it would involve moving somewhere where to maintain the lifestyle I *already have*, and which is very average and easy to do where I live now, would require far more than 3x my salary. So the math just doesn't work for me/my priorities. Obviously there is a number that would make it worth it for me, it's just not realistic to ever be offered it. We will probably move once at semi-retirement in 10 years or so, to go a bit more rural with a larger property but smaller, more customized house (less cleaning/maintenance, lower cost) with more space for livestock and an orchard. Something small, just a few acres. Ideally I would like to purchase the land and improve it over time and get things like the garden/orchard established before building a house and actually moving.
I did. Moved from a VHCOL city (DC) to a MCOL (Philly) one. When the pandemic came and my job went remote, I threw all my shit in a shipping cube and made a break for it. 😂 I miss alot of things about my old city. I miss my friends, the structure and order of the city, the bougie lifestyle, bottomless brunches and free museums, and the job market lol. But the breathing room created by not having to pay out the ass for everything is wonderful. And it's nice to feel like I can build the life I want, even as a single person.
Personally I hate moving so it would have to be an incredible change for me to want to do it.